Mom's Crayon - By L. Klonsky

5 Pumpkin Cocktails To Make Your Fall Sparkle

2015-10-30T20:09:00.004-04:00

It's Fall and the air is crisp here, in the Northeast.

Time for my 7 pumpkin-inspired cocktails to help add a bit more spirit to your season!

Hot Buttered Pumpkin Spice Rum – I would imagine that this isn't the lowest-calorie drink because it has butter in it, but it's a great drink to warm you up. Sip it before a roaring fire...

or flickering candle for extra ambiance.

Ingredients: 2 tablespoon of butter (make sure they're at room temperature); 1 tablespoon of softened dark brown sugar, 2 teaspoons of pumpkin-pie spice, 2 ounces of dark rum, and 12 ounces of HOT apple cider.

Directions: In a mixing bowl, use a whisk to whip the butter, brown sugar and pie spice together. Put it in the refrigerator and chill until it's firm. Then halve the mix and the mug and place in two mugs. Stir in the hot cider. Note: you could even top this with whipped cream and sprinkles and add a cinnamon stick to make it even more special.

Pumpkin Flavored Vodka – Okay, this is more time-intensive, so you might want to start now, but it yields a wonderful Fall take on vodka. Note that you'll need a large, sealable glass container for this, like a recycled glass juice bottle or glass storage jar.

Ingredients: 1-1/2 cups of pumpkin pie filling, vodka.

Directions: Place the pie filling in the container and fill the rest with vodka. Mix them both up and let the concoction sit in the refrigerator for a week to 10 days. Filter the mixture through a coffee filter which you've put in a kitchen strainer. TaDa!

Kahlua Pumpkin Martini – It doesn't get any easier than this!

Ingredients: Kahlua Pumpkin Spice, vodka

Directions: Mix equal parts of both together with ice. Shake and strain into a chilled glass. Add a bit of orange zest or a cinnamon stick to garnish.

Spiced Pumpkin Cider – Another warm drink you can sip while watching the leaves fall, it reminds me of the Spiced Rum recipe above, but with fewer calories. It also makes the house smell amazing!

Ingredients: 1 cup of pumpkin puree, 2-1/2 cups of apple cider, 1/3 cup of spiced rum, 1-1/2 teaspoons of pumpkin pie spice, a cinnamon stick, a sprinkle or two of nutmeg.

Directions:

In a large pot, whisk together the puree, cider, pumpkin pie spice, and cinnamon stick. When the mixture begins to boil, reduce the heat to low and simmer for 20 minutes. Strain it to get rid of any lumps and the cinnamon stick. Add rum and sprinkle with a bit of nutmeg. Serve it

warm. Yummmmmm!

Pumpkin Pie Martini – I've been watching quite a bit of Love It Or List It lately and at the end of each episode, the winner buys the loser a martini, so martinis have been on my mind lately. Here's a great one to celebrate with:

Ingredients: 4 ounces of vodka, pumpkin pie spice, 1 ounce of vanilla vodka

Directions: Pour both vodkas into a shaker of ice and, well, shake. Strain into two glasses and add a dash of pumpkin pie spice.

Nothing says Fall like pumpkins (let's ignore all the leaves we need to rake!). Enjoy these EASY drinks and embrace the magic of the season!

PLEASE VISIT ME ON MY OTHER BLOG, "Is It Hot In Here?" Menopause, Motherhood & More. See you there, too!

Because We Need To Be With Families Who Look Like Us

2015-07-01T18:22:00.001-04:00

Ah, this poor, neglected blog! If you're reading this, thank you for coming back! This is my personal blog, as opposed to my other one, "Is It Hot In Here?" Menopause, Motherhood & More (http://isithotinheremmm.blogspot.com), which I'm TRYING to turn into a money maker.

If you've been reading either blog, you know that I am the proud mother of a little girl who was adopted from China. You can read my family's story here. A few years ago, we had a MASSIVE reunion with about ten families who traveled with my husband to China to pick up their daughters. The reunion was INCREDIBLE! All of the girls got along and the parents got to trade stories about their kids (one fascinating similarity: they are very strong-willed children). And even though we're scattered across the country, my family is fortunate to live within driving distance of two of of those families.

We LOVE seeing the Smiths and Johnsons (not their real names). We get together with them at least once a year. It's lovely that the girls are virtually growing up together and pick up exactly where they left off the last time we all gathered.

It's also crucial that they see other families that look like us.

When we first started meeting, the siblings (who are all biological) would also trade stories, but since two are teenagers and of different sexes, that's not happening as much. The teens are bored; that's tough toenails because this is really about the little ones and the parents.

Our gatherings are low-maintenance. We don't need any kind of fancy sightseeing trips. On our last trip to Wilkes-Barre, Pennsylvania, it poured! That was fine because our hotel had an indoor pool (we ALWAYS get an indoor pool) which the girls splashed around in until they were water-logged and tired. They played video games in our room and we ended the weekend with a trip to the mall. For the parents, it's become less of a "comparing notes" session and more the opportunity to just see friends.

My daughter is the ultimate blessing and being able to share our parenting experience with other families who have gone through the adoption process and tackle some of the same issues we do ( such as instilling pride in our daughters' origins and country, some of the questions the girls pose about their births, etc.) has been important to us.

Interracial families are not the anomaly they once were, but they're still not common. Seeing other families who have grown in other ways than by direct genetics is important.

We are so lucky that our family has grown in love thanks to adoption.

Mom's First Experience With A Teenager On Halloween

2014-10-28T19:27:00.000-04:00

Last year, for the first time ever, my new teenager went trick-or-treating outside our neighborhood. While I realized he wasn't foraging into a ghetto or any particularly dangerous areas, it was the first time he went out into a section of town that I'm not intimately familiar with and hanging with friends I did not know. So, as is very common these days, I was nervous. And what do I, The Most Neurotic Mom In The World, do when I'm nervous? I come up with a plan so that there's some predictability in my life and Junior knows what I will expect of him. Here's what I came up with:


When you have a brand-new teen, Halloween is quite different!

Please wear a costume. I HATE it when teenagers come to my door on Halloween night and they're not wearing any kind of disguise. They just stand there, holding out pillowcases or Target bags, blankly looking at me – not even SAYING anything thing – expecting candy. WTF?! You want freebies, you make a friggin' effort! Fortunately, Junior is on board with this. He and his posse are going out dressed, I kid you not, as a herd of horses and unicorns. I have NO idea why, but according to the guy at Party City, these costumes are the hottest ones among teens. The problem is, you can't see too well out of these masks, so I'm hoping my son and his friends are careful. At least Junior's is white so cars will see him. When I suggested he wear reflective tape on his jacket and pants, I thought he was going to shoot

When I call you to find out where I should pick you up, please answer. I don't plan on being in costume on Halloween, however, I may be wearing my froggie pajama bottoms and will have a jar of cold cream and some curlers in the car. If you are not where you're supposed to be, I will get out of the car and come looking for you dressed as Irate, Psycho Mom. I don't think you want your friends to see that.

Please be prepared for pickup by 8pm. I need you and your sister home at a decent hour. I realize that after you guys get home, there will be at least an hour of candy trading ahead of us (remember: Snickers and Butterfingers are mine). I need to get you both in bed at a sensible hour so I can raid your stashes after you're asleep.

The Teen's costume - I'm so proud...(NOT!)

I'm not sure if these guidelines will do any good, but so far, Junior has agreed to them. I'm sure at least one will be ignored and I did have the foresight to make sure his monthly orthodontist appointment has been scheduled for Monday. While I'm a little sad that my son won't be accompanying his little sister trick-or-treating, I realize that it was insane to think he'd hang with us on Halloween. He's too cool and too grown up for that. My job is to try to minimize any dangers he'll be exposed to on Thursday.

Gotta go now. I wonder if he noticed the reflective patches I sewed onto the pillowcase he used for his loot? :)))

Note: this article was updated to see how successful these guidelines were.

--

So here's my update on how it went last year:

Teen discovered after about an hour of trick-or-treating with his sister that the rubber mask he was wearing was HOT. "Mom, can you see how much sweat is in here?" he asked. I declined but inside was going, "Told you so!" He then changed into the costume he wore last year. I have no idea how much he ate while he was out, but I do know that before I took him to his friend's house, I made him eat a burrito which I'd packed in my bag. Only a mother would pack a burrito in her bag...deep sigh. His braces were NOT compromised although the little bugger claimed that he got so little candy (BS!) that he couldn't spare Mom a Snickers. And I did not need to pick him up. My husband, the self-avowed Grinch Who Can't Stand Halloween, offered to get his son because, in my husband's words, "I'd rather go pick up The Boy than be home and have to keep opening the door." PS: Mom is home all day with your stash, Junior, so a few of your Snickers are already in my belly.

Yik Yak, A Dangerous App High Schoolers Should Avoid

2014-09-21T20:27:00.000-04:00

Recently, our high school principal sent out a warning about a smart phone app called Yik Yak. I'm happy he did because if you're the parent of a child in high school, you NEED to know about it.

YIK YAK IS A SOCIAL MEDIA SITE THAT ALLOWS USERS TO POST ANONYMOUSLY.

Yik Yak is a social media site that allows users to post anonymously; they do not have to sign-up nor do they need to declare a user name. Users post comments, questions, or claims about others without assuming any responsibility for their words. They can share posts with those within a 1.5 mile radius, meaning they can target people they both know and don't know. As such, Yik Yak threads have become a platform for libel, drug discussions, sexual suggestions, and cyber bullying. Schools and sometimes even the police cannot identify individuals' postings on Yik Yak.

USERS CAN "UP VOTE" HARMFUL POSTINGS, THUS PROVIDING NEGATIVE REINFORCEMENT.

The app is set up with game-like features that give users the power to “control what is hot” by “up voting” and “down voting” other people's posts. The continuous tally of your “up votes” is called a Yakarma score with users encouraged to “create quality content” to achieve a higher score. In other words, the juicer your posts, the higher your Yakarma score will be. If a post receives five “down votes,” the user's Yakarma score goes down and the post is deleted. Sure, this sounds positive, but it's not because users can “up vote” harmful postings, thus providing negative reinforcement.

The most disturbing thing about Yik Yak are the repercussions posts can have. Someone can post a salacious rumor about your child which can spread like wildfire on their high school campus and neither you nor they have any way of knowing who posted it. Any defense made will certainly not get the amount of views that the initial rumor received. In other words, Yik Yak renders your kid defenseless against their peers.

THERE ARE LOTS OF SEXUAL COMMENTS, RACIST REMARKS, REFERENCES TO DRUGS, SEXISM, HOMOPHOBIA, AND JUST PLAIN MEANNESS ON YIK YAK.

I downloaded the app last night and was immediately disgusted by the amount of sexual comments, racist remarks, references to drugs, sexism, homophobia, and just plain meanness of so many posts. There are some really depraved people on Yik Yak. No wonder at least one psychiatrist has dubbed it “the most dangerous app out there” (read his article here: http://www.foxnews.com/opinion/2014/05/09/psychiatrist-view-yik-yak-is-most-dangerous-app-ive-ever-seen).

So what can we as parents do? Grab your high schooler's phone and/or table and see if they have Yik Yak downloaded. If they do, ask why they have it and discuss with them what would happen if they or one of their friends was targeted in a post. Help them to see how destructive the app actually is – a discussion with you can be extremely valuable.

GRAB YOUR HIGH SCHOOLER'S PHONE/TABLE AND SEE IF THEY HAVE YIK YAK DOWNLOADED.

My son and I talked about Yik Yak and I was relieved to see, for myself, that he does not have it on any of his devices. He said he's heard about it from friends and, in his words, “it's evil.” That's now. He could give in to peer pressure in the future. As I always do, I'll be monitoring his electronics to see what he's downloading. Cyber-beasts like Yik Yak are out there. It's up to us, as parents, to protect our kids as much as possible.

For more on Yik Yak, please visit the sources I used for this article: https://www.insidehighered.com/blogs/student-affairs-and-technology/yik-yak-anagram-hot-mess; http://www.huffingtonpost.com/diana-graber/yik-yak-app-makers-do-the_b_5029679.html; http://nymag.com/thecut/2014/04/gossip-app-brought-my-high-school-to-a-halt.html; http://www.businessinsider.com/what-is-yik-yak-2014-5.

Please note, this article first appeared on the website The Geek Parent.

Copper Fit Knee Sleeve – Does The Copper Really Make A Difference?

2014-08-29T20:39:00.000-04:00

Please note: Although I was given a sample of this product for reviewing purposes, all opinions are my own.

Copper Fit is allegedly perfect for all kinds of people: performance athletes, physical workers, or older individuals looking for easier movement and pain relief. But the truth is, I know plenty of people who don't fit that any of those profiles yet still have pain and restricted movement. In fact, if you're as overweight as some of my relatives are, those two symptoms are a result of too much poundage and not enough exercise. In any case, Copper Fit's goal is to provide relief. It is “designed to help stabilize and support muscles, provide support for pain, stiffness, and soreness, as well as aid in recovery and performance by supporting improved circulation and oxygenation.” The miracle aspect of the product is the fact that the fabric is copper-infused. Copper “possess antimicrobial properties and enhancement benefits” and was used by the Ancient Egyptians, Romans and Aztecs.

But does it work?

Well, yes and no. I am no athlete, but I did wear the sleeve around one knee (for some reason you only get ONE knee sleeve in the box), during the day, for about a week. I do not have a bum knee per se, but since I just started an exercise program, my knees have been feeling sore and tired. Did I notice a difference? If I did, I think it was more because of the compression that was happening to my knee, rather than any copper-induced miracle. In fact, the knee felt the same as it had when I was wearing a generic knee sleeve that I'd bought at CVS.

So if the compression is the aspect that makes you feel better, is Copper Fit (which is priced on Amazon at $16.33 today, $19.99 plus $7.99 shipping and handling on the www.GetCopperFit.com website) worth paying more for when the CVS model was only $10.99? Again, yes and no. Logic says that if you’re really in a lot of pain and the cheaper unit doesn't work, it may behoove you to try the more expensive one. For me, however, the deciding factor is the return policy. While Amazon and CVS provide full refunds, ordering the unit via the Copper Fit company's website will only get you refunded the purchase price, not the $7.99 shipping and handling.

Pain relief is individual and important to one's quality of life. The question of whether or not to buy this product comes down to how much relief is worth to you. Obviously, that's something only you can decide. Try Copper Fit. Physically, it can help. The only thing that it may hurt will be your wallet.

Thanks for reading!

Comforting A Child With Bronchitis

2014-08-27T10:58:00.001-04:00

It's been a rough nine days in my house. My son, who is NEVER sick, was running a 102 degree fever for 8 days. At first, the doctor thought it was a simple virus. When his temp hit 104.8 two nights later, I freaked, although the doctor on call didn't. She started him on an antibiotic. When he still wasn't any better, another pediatrician at the practice diagnosed him as having “bronchitis and 'recovering pneumonia'.” It turns out that two viruses are fighting for control of my poor Teen. She prescribed two more antibiotics which, THANK GOD, have brought down his fever, although he's starting on a steroid today to stop his wheezing.

Making him comfortable throughout this has been a challenge. Here are 5 things I've been doing which seem to be helping:

Eucalyptus oil – A few drops of this on his pillow seem to make him cough less. I did when when my kids were babies and I couldn't rub Vicks on their chest.
Using the Chillow when a child has a fever – When I reviewed the Chillow on my other blog (read it here), I suggested it might be helpful for a feverish child and it certainly was. The coolness of the Chillow helped him on very restless nights. It's now part of my arsenal when anyone is running hot.
Ovaltine – Junior has not been eating much at all. Ovaltine was my go-to drink when my son was growing up and refused to eat fruits and veggies. Yes, it contains sugar but it also has 12 vitamins and minerals. It's one of those “comfort drinks” from when my son was little. I mixed it in with whole milk (because he needs the calories right now) and I'm happy that at least he's getting some nutrition in addition to the seltzer he lives on and, thankfully, has been drinking throughout this ordeal. For more on Ovaltine, click here.
Salt water in the nebulizer – Although the doctor has Junior on Albuterol, at the first cough, I usually put salt water in our nebulizer and start the kid on that every few hours. The steam is comforting. I follow that up, at night, with the vaporizer.
Some fresh air – Junior has been weakened by this illness, but getting him out, just for a walk around the perimeter of the house, clears his head a bit. Plus, since being sick for so long is just plain depressing, it reminds him that there is life outside this house that he'll soon be a part of again.

He just announced he's bored. GOOD! If he can tell me that, it's time that he begins, gradually, to get back to really living. Later on, I'll take him for soccer cleats and a new backpack. High school starts next week and he needs to be ready. The bronchitis and pneumonia will soon be an unpleasant memory. These viruses have robbed him of two weeks of Summer vacation. It's time for us to re-claim what's left of this season before we move on to the next.

Thanks for reading!

How To Shop For Jeans – After You've Gained A Few Pounds

2014-08-23T17:32:00.001-04:00

I will NOT beat myself up for not looking like this!

Please note that although I was compensated for this post and that writing on this subject was suggested, all opinions are my own.

Fall will soon be upon us, here, in the Northeast. That's when I live in jeans - nice, comfy jeans. Unfortunately, I ate a wee bit too much this Summer and I've put on a few pounds, rendering my Size 6 jeans to the closet for the immediate future. What to do?

Since the weight I put on took 3 months to get there, it's not going to disappear overnight, no matter how much I wish it would. It's time to face reality: I need new pants in a larger size. Since I've done this before, here is how to approach shopping for women's jeans after you've packed on a few pounds.

Do not beat yourself up for packing on a few pounds!!! I can't emphasize this enough. Weight gain happens to the best of us. Inflicting guilt on yourself doesn't do a bit of good. Resolve to get the weight off, but in the meantime, deal with the reality that you are now a different size than the one you'd like to be.

Think about what type of jeans you want. Designer jeans or non-designer jeans? What type: denim jeans or colored ones? Ripped or non-ripped? Straight-leg or bootcut style jeans are your best bet. Avoid low-rise jeans because they'll cause the much-dreaded muffin top. Mid-rise jeans are better when you've got a belly.

Go to the store with whatever pair of shoes you'll be wearing the jeans with, since that will help with the issue of where the pant legs will fall. Although I love the look of True Religion Brand Jeans and others you can buy online, trying pants on is essential, especially when you're on the large side. Maybe skinnier people have a greater margin of error, but I don't.

If you stick to one brand of jeans and one size, understand that there will be tiny differences in the fit in every batch of your size because good jeans are hand cut. Take a few pair of the same size into the changing room and try them on. If you need to suck your tummy waaay in or lie on the floor to zip the pants up, you need a bigger size. Again, muffin tops are not pretty, too tight jeans encourage yeast infections, and passing out from not being able to breathe is bad.

Move around and sit down in any jeans you try on. Is the crotch seam comfortable? How does the waist feel – is it digging in? Do your knees feel like a boa constrictor is wrapped around them? COMFORT is as important as look.

Make sure you know the store's return policy before you buy the pants. What if you get home and decide they're not for you? I've had too many “what was I thinking!” moments. Returning the pants has to be an option.

Am I proud that I put on a few pounds? Certainly not! But my self-worth is not determined by a number on the scale. Time to watch what I'm eating, exercise more, and face the reality that I need new pants. After all, I deserve to look good this Fall!

For more tips on how to buy jeans, visit The Chic Fashionista.

Back to the salad bar for me...yumm!

A Literary Sedative For Kids - Dr. Seuss's Sleep Book - A MUST HAVE For ALL Parents

2014-08-17T15:25:00.000-04:00

My children are having a difficult time adjusting from West Coast time to East Coast hours. Their sleep patterns are scrambled. While I could probably give them a tiny bit of melatonin, I'm, instead, taking the literary road – with Dr. Seuss's Sleep Book.

I discovered this tome when the Teen was maybe 2 and it's been my “emergency sedative” for him and my daughter ever since. Dr. Seuss tells the story of Van Vleck, a very small bug who is getting sleeeeepy. His yawn (they're contagious, you know) sets off a chain reaction which makes those around him tired and gradually spreads world-wide.

In the book's pages you'll meet all kinds of exotic creatures including stilt-walkers, the Hinkle-Horn Honking Club, the collapsible Frink, Joe and Mo Redd-Zoff, the Hoop-Soup-Snoop Group, the Curious Crandalls, Chippendale Mupp (who bites his tail), Mr. and Mrs. J. Carmichael Krox, snorers who make music, a dreaming moose and goose, the Bumble-Tub Club which is sleeping afloat, and the salesmen in the Vale of Va-Vode sleeping all over the road (and everywhere else).

The book's cadence is mesmerizing as it lulls you into a state of relaxation. Reading it to your child, you will find yourself calmer and yawning along with your child. It is the BEST Dr. Seuss book you'll ever read and is the next best thing to a ride in the car to help your child fall asleep. Buy it, read it, keep it. You may even use it after the kids move out.

Please note that this posting originally appeared on www.thegeekparent.com.

The Uniform Of The Stay-At-Home Mom

2014-07-23T14:52:00.000-04:00

Not what a stay-at-home mom wears...unless she's insane!

Please note that although I was compensated for this post and that writing on this subject was suggested, all opinions are my own.

There's a parade at our town pool every day. In sharp contrast to most of the people there, mothers and grandparents who are not working and who are dressed in swim wear and coverups, at 5 in the afternoon in comes a sharp line of adults wearing the uniforms of the 9 to 5 world. These tired-looking working parents arrive at the pool to pick up their little YMCA campers who are spending their Summer swimming and playing games. The mostly upper-management women clip-clop around in high heels and try to remain cool, despite the oppression of panty hose, in skirts. They wear make-up and sport the latest hair styles. The men are clad in Wall Street Wear: well-tailored suits in shades of gray and blue. A few have taken off their ties and opened their shirts. All of them look happy to be out of the office and I'll bet many wish to be in swim wear, frolicking in the pool with their little ones. But this “parade of office wear” started me thinking about the “uniform” of the stay-at-home moms I know.

We are concerned, nay, CONSUMED by the desire for comfort. We've got enough to think about, namely kids, without fussing with clothes that are uncomfortable or staying current

Neon peach blossom sports bra - with the holding power of a crane

with the latest fashion. Our clothes must allow for movement as we keep up with Roadrunner-like toddlers and preschoolers who think they're indestructible. For that reason, we gravitate toward workout apparel and yoga clothes like those sold by Sweaty Betty (great name, huh?). You've gotta love this stuff! It's durable, has plenty of support for wiggling, jiggling, gravity-laden body parts. It looks sleek and is comfortable. Sports bras hold EVERYTHING in place without killing shoulders or making you feel like a boa constrictor is squeezing your chest. And yoga pants are snuggly enough so that when our kid takes a nap (if they EVER will), we can curl up for one, too. Workout clothes are nice enough that you're not embarrassed to answer the door when the

Calypso yoga pants - snugly

UPS guy comes and when I wear them, I can delude myself into thinking that I might actually someday want to work out (NOT!).

Right now, I am perfectly content, okay, grateful, for my summer uniform of capri pants and t-shirts when I'm not at the pool. But I am also aware that in my future are heels, skirts, and tailored suits as I get back into the working world. When my little one is older and I finally enter a new phase of parenthood to once again, join the 9 to 5ers, my uniform will change. Maybe I should be paying closer attention to the parade before me. It's only a matter of time before I rejoin their ranks.

Thank you for reading!

The Red Hoodie

2014-07-22T14:00:00.004-04:00

As kids get older, they're supposed to give up special objects they're attached to, right? Maybe. I know plenty of adults who had significant objects they're used to and would miss if the objects were gone. Note that I am NOT talking about technology which contains important information we cannot live without. But every time I lose a pair of earrings or leave a pair of flip flops behind on vacation, I'm a little sad. So I guess I should not be surprised by the red sweatshirt.

Every year for the last few, my teenager has become one with a hoodie. It doesn't matter if he's picked it out or it was given to him. He wears one zip-up sweatshirt...in all types of weather...no matter what. Here's the current model:

Note that he's wearing it at the pool... on a 105 degree day... in the sun. He wore it, and only it, over a shirt when the weather was 10 below zero. He wore it earlier today while he was jogging in 100 degrees. He wears it in the rain, sleet, and snow.

Junior does not let me wash the hoodie. It has crumbs from a thousand protein bars in its pockets. It has stains from burritos and pizza. It smells putrid, like something the EPA fines municipalities for. My husband and I joke that it probably contains bacteria like listeria and e-coli. Interestingly enough, my son takes pride in how absolutely disgusting his hoodie is.

I do, of course, wash it. When he's sleeping, the only time he takes it off, I secretively bring it down to the washing machine. The article gets washed alone, because the water it gets submerged in turns gray. It gets put in the dryer, sans dryer sheets which might make it smell nice, and then placed back in a heap by the front door for Junior to don in the morning.

My son will wear the hoodie until, like the Incredible Hulk, he's bursting out of it. Then, he'll either ask for or get a replacement from a friend or Nana.

It comforts me to know he's attached to something so inane. Someday, when he's a bit more grown, he'll bring home a girl and she'll either demand that he get rid of it or he'll ditch it for her. Until then, the repulsive hoodie is a reminder that he's still my little boy and, like his former favorite stuffed wolf, he needs an object of comfort.

Thank you for reading! Please visit me on http://isithotinheremmm.blogspot.com.

Adding Fragrance To Your House For FREE

2014-07-16T15:37:00.001-04:00

Sometimes when you're burning a candle, the wick burns down so far that all you have left is wax and no wick. Or you may have a candle but don't want to spend the money on a holder. I used to take those pieces of wax and orphan candles and use them in the fireplace when I needed help starting a fire. Last Winter, however, with me using the fireplace less thanks to the kids' busy schedules, I had a stockpile of wax and nothing to use it for.

Without a holder, this candle is useless, right? WRONG!

Then one day when I was in the store looking at wax melts, I realized that they're merely leftover pieces of candles, like the kind I had at home. So I grabbed a few clean baby food jars (I ALWAYS stockpile those) with the labels peeled off, chopped up pieces of my old candles, and placed the now-filled jars on a candle warmer I'd bought on clearance. The wax pieces melt on the warmer and my house smells like I have a candle burning.

Candle fragments melted in a baby food jar.

Alternatives to this are:

If you don't have a baby food jar, use any kind of clean jar without labels that will fit on the warmer. When you need to label the scent, just write on the jar using a Sharpie marker; you can re-label the jar by washing the marker off with alcohol or scrubbing it clean.
If you don't have any candle fragments lying around, grab some dryer scent boosters (see photo below) and place those in a jar.

Laundry scent booster
So that you remember to turn off the candle warmer before you leave the house or go to bed, leave your car keys or cell phone near the warmer. Chances are, you'll reach for one of those, realize that they're not where they should be, and turn the warmer off.

Do you have any uses for leftover candle pieces? Let me know!

Ahhh...the house smells lovely!

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How To Make A Voodoo Doll - A Primer For Kids

2014-07-15T12:48:00.000-04:00

If you follow me on Twitter (and please do: https://twitter.com/IsItHotInHereMM), you know that recently, my 8-year old said she wanted to make a voodoo doll. At first, I was a little concerned that she wanted to make one of ME (aka "She Who Yells A Lot"), but as it turned out, the victim is her brother. Whew! So why him? “Payback, Mom, payback,” she said. She's PISSED at him, big time, most of the time. So I let her make the voodoo doll. Here's why:

While voodoo dolls are associated with evil, they're actually meant to gain influence over whomever you're making the doll about. Diva is 8; her brother is almost 14. She weighs maybe 45 pounds; he's heavier and taller. She is jealous of him and the privileges he gets because of his age. If making a voodoo doll makes her feel better, I'm all for it.

Here's how we made it:

We took an old shirt the Teen had outgrown. The doll is more “powerful” if you use a personal item from the victim.
I drew and made a template out of cardboard. I did it freehand, but free templates can be found here: http://www.allcrafts.net/dolls.htm.
She cut the material out using the template.
Since Diva did not want to sew, we used a glue gun to glue the two pieces together, leaving a hole for stuffing.
This particular doll will not be washed, so I used part of a plastic grocery bag to stuff it; then she glued the hole shut.
She then used markers to color the doll so that it looks like her brother. Note the red sweatshirt that the kid wears, no matter what the weather. On 100 degree days, he STILL wears the shirt outside.

Diva was giddy at the prospect of having influence over her brother while he had decided, quite kindly, to play along with the premise of the doll. He was at a friend's house while the doll was being created, but my daughter still took great pleasure at making the doll do a split, stand on it's head, etc. When we went to pick Junior up, she asked if he'd done the split or felt anything weird. He answered that yes, he inexplicably HAD done a split and had had a headache just at the precise moment when she was playing with the doll. “MOMMY, IT WORKS,” she yelled.

Because I helped her make the doll, I explained that it won't work all the time, which gives us some wiggle room when she wants her brother to do things he just can't be bothered to do. When she finds out the truth, my explanation will be that I wanted to see her to see what a wonderful creation she was capable of making and that I just wanted her to have fun. My sense is that she's going to become bored with the doll pretty quickly. In fact, as I write this, neither she nor I know where the dang thing is.

It's hard enough being a little sister. If making a voodoo doll empowers her, makes her feel better, then I'm happy for my daughter. More power to her!

Please check back in with me soon! Oh, and check out my boards on Pinterest at http://www.pinterest.com/isithotinheremm.

Celebrating The Sandals Of Summer

2014-07-14T20:01:00.000-04:00

Please note: Although I was compensated for writing this post, all opinions expressed are my own. Meet me on the street during the Summer and I WILL be wearing sandals.

It may be silly, but one of the things I love the most about the Summer is the fact that you can wear sandals virtually every day! I ditch shoes the first warm day at the end of Spring and don't put them on again until I'm sure my toes are going to freeze (can you say Toesicle?). Shoes are confining, hot, and take too long to put on, plus you have to wear socks. I HATE socks which mean washing and matching them. Ugh! I slip on sandals and, like a pig in mud, am one happy Mom!

Women's sandals seem to morph every season into one specialty or another, but basically, there are five types of sandals:

Gladiator – Defined by rows of horizontal straps, these sandals may sport a heel or not. They're striking and call attention to themselves, which is great for taking attention off a less-than-fit body.
Espadrilles – Traditionally flat, espadrilles are defined by a sole made of jute or rope. They're beautiful with a skirt.
Heels – These can be strappy heels or wedges. I haven't worn any kind of heels since my teenager was born and I'm pretty sure I'd get vertigo if I even attempted them.
Flats – Beading and jewels can transform a dull, flat sandal into something dazzling.
Ankles – These feature a wide ankle strap and open toe. Some have a shaft around the ankle, like a short boot. Again, for me, they're not worth the extra effort to put on.

I crave shoes I can slip in and out of without a thought. I have a hard enough time remembering which kid is where without thinking about my footwear. I also need sandals to be comfortable, since I'm never quite sure what the day holds in terms of walking. I've tried cheap ones and find that more expensive brands, like the kind found on www.reef.com, are well worth the money because they last longer and provide more support. Another bonus is that the companies that sell better-made sandals tend to stick behind their products more than, discount stores. Here's a tip: sandals that match your skin color tend to make your legs look longer, so most of my sandals are light brown to match my mildly-tanned skin.

Recently, I ordered a pair of Reef's thong flip flops (see photograph above). They have padded leather and provide arch and heel support. That support is essential for me because if I'm on my feet for most of the day, they ache and at my age, I don't need any more aches and pains! The rubber outsole of the Reef Tahoe means I don't slip on the wet patio after my daughter has been in the sprinklers.

Since I need two pair of sandals for the season, I also have a pair from last year that resemble Reef's Movement thong sandals . Models like this are built for maximum mobility, the type a parent needs at an amusement or water park. They protect against germs (and if, like us, your family has had plantar warts, you are very aware of this!) and provide arch support.

For some interesting reading about sandals, visit:

This article (http://www.huffingtonpost.com/steve-rosenberg/the-truth-about-the-shoes_b_1703630.html) entitled The Truth About Shoes of Summer, Sandals, Flip Flops And Wedgesextolls the virtues of the sandal and gives advice on how to choose the right type for you.
SheFinds has a piece on the 8 Types Of Sandals Every Girl Needs In Her Closet This Spring(http://www.shefinds.com/2014/8-types-of-sandals-every-girl-needs-in-her-closet-this-spring). The sandals shown are pretty, but my first reaction is “Yeah, like I have the budget for eight pair!” Author Maria Bobila lists, among the “necessary”ones, stilettos. For me, that's a fast-track to a sprained or broken ankle.
Everyday Health has this article (http://www.everydayhealth.com/pain-management-pictures/shoes-that-hurt-feet.aspx#/slide-2) that lists sandals among the 7 Shoes That Hurt Your Feet. Read into the piece, however, and it says that unsupportive models are the culprit. That's why, again, you'll want to look at sandals that do offer support.

As I type this, I am acutely aware of my sandal-wearing feet. I can wiggle my toes and see my home-done pedicure. My feet are not boxed into shoes, encased in boots, or confined by socks. They are cool, free, and happy. And when my feet are happy, I am happy. You can choose to celebrate Summer's warm weather. Me? I'll celebrate sandals!

Thanks for reading! Join me on "Is It Hot In Here?" Menopause, Motherhood & More and don't forget to follow me on Twitter.

6 Games For Pool Fun When You Can't Use Toys

2014-07-01T09:50:00.002-04:00

My town has two great pools, but the kids are not allowed to bring toys into the large, main pool. After they've place Marco Polo ad nauseum, they sometimes run out of games to play. So here are six alternatives:

Fetch (2 or more players) – Now, toys are not allowed, but goggles and hair accessories are. So one way we get around the rules is to use common permitted items that the kids can dive for, such as goggles (we even keep broken ones for this purpose), hair scrunchies, bracelets, etc. You throw one item and see which kid brings it to the surface first. Note: this can be played with one player if she competes against herself. To do this, time the player and see if she can beat her time in retrieving the object.
Water Leapfrog (4 to 8 players) – Divide players into two teams. Each team is on opposite ends of the pool, standing in chest-high water with their legs spread apart. The last player has to dive and swim through the legs of his teammates and spread his legs. Then the next player goes. The team that reaches the other side of the pool first wins.
What Time Is It Mr. Fox (3 or more players) – This is a variation of a game my son learned in preschool and it's awesome! One person is designated Mr. Fox and stands at the end of the pool while the rest of the players are on the other side. The kids call out, “What time is it Mr. Fox?” Then Mr. Fox says a time and the kids swim that number of strokes toward him. This goes on until Mr. Fox calls out, “Midnight!” Then all the kids swim back to the starting line while Mr. Fox tries to tag one. If Mr. Fox succeeds, that kid becomes the new Mr. Fox.
Contests (2 or more players) – Which kid can dive into the pool: the furthest from the edge, make the smallest/largest splash, can do the funniest dive, can jump the highest into the pool, etc.
Sharks & Minnows (3 or more players) – One person is the Shark and stands in the deep end of the pool while the other players are on the side. The Shark yells “lunchtime” and the players standing on the side of the pool have 30 seconds to swim to the other side of the pool without being tagged. Anyone who is tagged has to join with the Shark and try to tag the remaining player(s). This goes on until either all of the kids are bored with playing or everyone has been tagged.
Freeze (3 or more players) – Players gather in the shallow end of the pool with adults or bigger kids on their knees. Players define the physical boundaries of the game so that everyone can stand up. One person is It. At the signal, It has one minute to tag as many other players as possible. Once tagged, a player has to stand “frozen” and raise his hand. Before a frozen player can return to play, an unfrozen player must thaw him out by diving under water and swimming through his legs. A player can't be tagged as frozen while they're under water. At the end of the minute, count how many people It has frozen. Then choose another player to be It. Keep going until everyone gets a turn being It. The winner is the person who has frozen the most people while they were It.

Not being able to have have toys in the pool makes playing games hard, but not impossible. Use the activities above and challenge your kids to come up with even more variations of games they play on the playground. This Summer, like all, is unique. Enjoy it!

Gearing Up For Summer

2014-06-20T14:42:00.002-04:00

Please note that although I was compensated for this post and that writing on this subject was suggested, all opinions are my own.

The kids are finally done with school. “Yeah” and “Oh my God!” While they're both going to half-day camp this summer, there's still a lot of days to fill (I counted – there are 77). Fortunately, we live in an area with tons of stuff to do outside. I may not be the most athletic or fit mom around, but I try.

Now, I've never camped but this year, we plan on spending at least one night in the backyard. But when I went pricing tents at our local Dick's Sporting Goods and Modell's, I had sticker-shock. Fortunately, there's a website called The Clymb that has outdoor equipment like camping gear, cycling equipment, etc., at bargain prices. They had a tent called The Lynx 4 which looks pretty simple to set up and even has a vestibule (?!) for extra storage. Even if we find out that camping isn't for us, The Lynx 4 will remain set up in the backyard for a few days because I think it would be a fun little place for my daughter and her friends to play in.

We also like to go cycling as a family. It's a great way to see many of the sights we bypass too quickly when we're traveling by car. Cycling, whether locally or on vacation, is great fun as well as fantastic exercise. We chat while we're pedaling along and it's a wonderful way to catch up with my high school-bound teen who is too often so immersed in video that I forget what his face looks like. When we bicycle locally, my husband does not have a bike, so he runs alongside us and the kids have great fun “racing” their dad.

With the beach a scant 90 minutes away, we try to get down there every few weeks, more for my mental health than a family love for it. My daughter spends hours digging in the sand while hubby and son play football further up on the beach. One piece of equipment I think is essential is a yoga mat which is heavier than a blanket and cleans up far easier. It also provides a little cushion from the hot sand. That, combined with a cooler packed with water and ice pops as well as snacks, sunglasses and sunscreen make for a wonderful mini-vacation.

Between those mini-adventures, some day trips, camp, hanging out with friends at the pool and our upcoming vacation to Pennsylvania, my kids should have lots to talk about when they return to school in the Fall. These 77 days will fly by, filled with summer memories that will last a lifetime. There's lots to do. Let's get to it!

The Lynx 4 Tent - Looks like fun, right?

8 Ways To Make Your Theme Park Visit More Fun

2014-06-19T15:20:00.000-04:00

Every year we make a pilgrimage to Hersheypark, the theme park in Hershey, Pennsylvania that really serves as a living advertisement for the Hershey Company. We've been doing it since my son was little and a he's kind of grown up there, passing through each of the height categories which they mark with a product line. He's gone from a Miniature (kids under 36”) to a Jolly Rancher (people who are 60” plus) in the blink of an eye. But we've also gone to plenty of other theme parks, including a few Six Flags, Knobels, and many owned by Disney.

Over the years, we've developed some “coping strategies” to make theme park visits more pleasant and definitely more affordable. Here are some:

Be prepared – Check the park's website for information on how to pay (one park we visited did not take credit cards and we had to run into the nearest town to find an ATM). Find out if there are discount tickets available and figure out which best fit the needs of your family. Hershey offers a Sunset Pass which allows you to enter the park the evening before and enjoy the next day at a bargain price. Whereas this wasn't prudent when my kids were little and had earlier bedtimes, it's great for now when they're older. It means we get more time in the park resulting in less rushing around to see everything.
Find out if you can bring in food/water – Yes, this is part of “be prepared” but it's also a money-saving tip. Water costs a lot in these parks, so if you can' bring it in, enter with an empty water bottle and plan on filling up at water fountains or in the bathroom where you can often find the coldest water. Also, in hot weather, many parks are required by law to give you ice when you ask for it. You can hydrate on ice cold water at a fraction of the cost. Similarly, bringing in protein bars and fruit not only saves money, but calories.
Plan when to go – Weekends tend to be busier. Cloudy days and weekdays tend to be less busy. Find out if there are any giveaways or special events planned. Those will make the park more congested as well.
Buy park souvenirs outside the park – We've found t-shirts and other items with the park's name on them, for a fraction of the cost, at a local Walmart and other retailers.
Do recon on the park and develope a strategy – Grab a map of the park, hopefully before your trip, and decide which rides are musts; then head to those first when you enter. By doing that, you'll avoid disappointment when the rides get super long, when the kids get cranky, or if inclement weather hits. If possible, make an itinerary. We always hit the attractions furthest from the entrance, so while most people are meandering through the park toward the back, we're working out way forward, thus avoiding the crowds. Know where shelter is (perhaps in a theater or arcade) and what might be air conditioned. On hot days, knowing where to find cool air will save you.
Pack a waterproof bag or backpack – You'll be living in your bag while you're at the park, so make sure it's durable and preferably waterproof. Stock it with hand sanitizer, cheap plastic ponchos, a first aid kit in a Ziploc bag, and sunscreen. Pack extra Ziploc bags to put electronics in to protect them from water rides, spills, or rain.
Take pictures of your kids when they first enter the park – In case you get separated, you'll be able to show people what your children look like and what they were last wearing.
Take breaks – Your visit isn't a race, it's an experience. Take into account that little feet need to rest. Don't rush the day; savor it.

Yep. We're headed to Hersheypark next month, as we have for the last decade. The one year we didn't go, the kids missed it terribly and it was then that I realized how much they looked forward to it and how the pilgrimage had become an important part of their childhood memories. Coping strategies won't entirely eliminate the stress of going, but will minimize it, allowing all of us to enjoy a rare day together, as as family.

Note: This post first appeared on the website "Is It Hot In Here?" Menopause, Motherhood & More

Father's Day Funnies

2014-06-15T19:01:00.001-04:00

My daughter and I went to Macy's yesterday to get her father a present. Apparently we were not the only last-minute shoppers. The store's Men's Department looked like a cyclone had hit it. We eventually picked out a tie and shirt for Diva's dad, which got me thinking about some of the funniest quotes by and about fathers that I've seen in Cyberspace. Here are a few:

"Having children is like living in a frat house - nobody sleeps, everything's broken, and there's a lot of throwing up." - Ray Romano

"My father only hit me once -- but he used a Volvo." -- Bob Monkhouse

In 1900, fathers passed on clothing to their sons. Today, kids wouldn't touch dad's clothes if they were sliding naked down an icicle. – Source Unknown

"There should be a children’s song 'If you’re happy and you know it, keep it to yourself and let your dad sleep.'" - Jim Gaffigan

"I never got along with my dad. Kids used to come up to me and say, 'My dad can beat up your dad.' I'd say, 'Yeah? When?'” -- Bill Hicks

"Daddy, Daddy, can I have another glass of water please?" "But I've given you 10 glasses of water already!" "Yes, but the bedroom is still on fire!" – Source Unknown

"My father had a profound influence on me. He was a lunatic." -- Spike Mulligan

One evening, while sitting around the dinner table, a little girl looked up and asked her father, "Daddy, you're the boss, right?" Her father was very pleased by this and replied, "Yes." Then, the little girl continued, "That's because mommy put you in charge, right?" – Source Unknown

“Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope.” - Bill Cosby

“You gotta love dads. At my wedding, when I tripped on my wedding dress and fell flat on my face, Dad said, 'Don’t worry, you’ll do better next time.'” – Melanie White

Happy Father's Day, Gentlemen!

~~

Please note that a version of this article appeared on the website: www.thegeekparent.com.

Daydreaming, Courtesy Of The White Company

2014-06-12T14:03:00.000-04:00

Dreaming of this...

Please note that although I was compensated for this post and that writing on this subject was suggested, all opinions are my own.

When I was growing up, back in the Dark Ages before the Internet, I lived for catalogs. Whenever the Sears, Lilian Vernon, or Spiegel books came, I'd snatch them up so that I could dream about what my house would look like when I grew up. I'd rip pages out showing items I wanted to buy, without a thought of cost, to fill my “happily ever after” place. I paid attention to things like high thread count in my linens, ways to “dress” up my tables to coincide with the Seasons, and tried to understand why table runners were important (they add color and texture to your decor). Dreaming blocked out the reality of my family's extremely tight budget and my mother's obliviousness to anything but practical matters like food and clothing.

Recently, I was transported back to my childhood as I looked over the website for The White Company. Unlike my life right now which is happily filled with kids who leave fingerprints on ANYTHING white, family members with allergies that render bed skirts a health hazard, and my own laziness about dusting and laundry, The White Company allowed me to dream as I had in the past.

I looked a white linen tablecloths and napkins, breakfast in bed trays, soap trays, and white bedding Savoy collection has a 400 thread count!). I delighted in the beautiful champagne glass buckets. I puzzled over a ceramic bottle arch (for those, like me, who don't know what they are, they hold bottles of body lotion). All the while, I tried to forget that my kids ignore the rule about playing ball in the house, that we never serve breakfast in bed due to crumbs, and don't have lit candles or diffusers around because our cat resembles a mountain goat in her desire to climb on any surface regardless of the height.

Some things are out of my reach right now, just as they were as a child, but for different reasons. One day, the kids will be off on their own, and there will be plenty of time to buy some of the lovely, impractical things I see in catalogs and on The White Company's website (although the site has plenty of useful items at decent prices) to adorn my retirement home. Until then, I can dream.

So that's what a ceramic bottle arch is!

The Soothsoft Mini Chillow Could Help Kids With Fevers

2014-06-04T13:38:00.003-04:00

On my other blog, "Is It Hot In Here?" Menopause, Motherhood & More (http://isithotinheremmm.blogspot.com/2014/06/product-review-soothsoft-mini-chillow.html), I recently wrote a review of the Soothsoft Mini Chillow which is helping me with the hot flashes I get in the middle of the night. Here, I want to review this product as something that could, potentially, help a sick kid.

Now, the Chillow is a water-cooled cushion that contains memory foam to keep you cool without electricity. I'd read mixed reviews on Amazon, but decided to try it, so I bought, not the full one, but the Mini model.

When you get it, you have to fill the Chillow up with water. This is the trickiest part because you will spill some. The trick is to hold the opening up with one hand while filling the product with the other hand. Then, after the foam absorbs the water, you carefully squeeze the air out during which you spill even more water. I had to squeeze the air out twice to have the Chillow look like it's supposed to in the instructions. You let the thing “rest” for four hours before using and, to get it even cooler, can put it in the refrigerator for up to 30 minutes before using.

After using the Mini Chillow for about a week now, I can tell you that it is not like putting your head something cold; rather, it is cool to the touch. It can absorb body heat, so I don't think you could honestly expect it to cool you down the whole night, but if you turn it around several times, it will definitely stay cool for several hours. It does have a kind of weird, burnt smell that threw me off the first night or two that I used it, but that smell has subsided. Using it with a pillow case, obviously, raises the temperature a bit, however, since I don't mind sleeping on the plastic side of it, I stopped using it with a pillowcase.

Yes, it helps with hot flashes, but I think it could really help a child who is sick with a fever. The temperature is soothing and since it doesn't require batteries and is medication free, it would be good for a kid who is, perhaps, age 4 and up since I think it could be somewhat of a suffocation hazard for a child younger than that. I understand from some of the reviews on Amazon that the product tends to leak or smell funny after a year, but for under $20, I'm willing to spend that for something that helps me sleep. It could also come in handy when you need a cool, not cold, compress.

My daughter has always felt warmer to the touch than other kids. I suspect that she just has a slightly higher body temperature than most. And since her bedroom tends to be warmer than other parts of the house, even with the central air on, I think this could help her and would certainly help kids whose houses don't have air conditioning.

Again, the Mini Chillow is available on Amazon.com, I've seen it at Wal-Mart and a few other stores. I think it's worth keeping in the house for when your child runs a fever.

The Fashionista And Her Fascination With Rue21

2014-06-03T10:52:00.000-04:00

Note: I was compensated for writing this post, however, all of the opinions expressed are mine.

My daughter's awareness of fashion began when she was in preschool. All the girls had to have Twinkle Toe shoes. When I wouldn't spring for the ultra-expensive shoes and sent her in with Target knock-offs, she was mortified. Apparently the other 4-year old girls knew her shoes weren't the real deal (!!) and made fun of her for it. Since then, Diva has been extremely vocal about the latest designs and even saves up her own money to buy the trendy clothes.

So when she saw me perusing Rue21's site while searching for a gift for a teenage girl we knew, she was thrilled. “Mom, I need Aztec leggings, shortalls, printed jogger pants...” Her list went on and on. She knew what all of those things were while I had to search the site to see what she was talking about.

I don't mind her emulating young adult fashion, as long as it's appropriate for someone in elementary school. The Aztec leggings, though not something that would fit my middle-aged body, would look cute on her. Similarly, tribal leggings would be perfect for the current weather in the

Shortalls would not fit our school's dress code

Northeast. In fact, when it gets hot and she's wearing leggings, she just cuffs them up to look like shorts.

The shortalls are another story. They remind me of the hot pants that were popular in the 70's and although cute, I can't imagine they'd be in accordance with our school's dress code where the length of shorts must be a few inches from a child's extended hand. Shortalls are simply too skimpy for school and not appropriate for a child as young as Diva, although they might be all right for an older girl.

Rue21's jogger pants are nice, but were not what I imagined when I thought of “jogger” pants. I was thinking something baggy in velour. These look more like leggings although they do have a drawstring waist and elastic in the back. Cute for a teen, but not really fitting my image of a younger girl. Similarly, the maxi skirts are lovely but look too old for teenage girls or any girls for that matter. Once again, in a blast from the past, I thought the chevron-patterned maxi skirts looked like something I wore when I was in middle school.

Together, my daughter and I chose a striped, double-scooped neck top for our neighbor and paired it with a high-waisted midi skirt I knew the birthday girl's mom would approve of. Her mother, like me, feels that young adolescents should not show off too much of their bodies.

There's tasteful, and then there's inappropriate. Rue 21 is a site where girls can “shop 'till they drop” and embrace their inner fashionistas without causing a mother too much concern.

My Husband's Birthday Hike

2014-06-02T10:58:00.001-04:00

We would have missed this amazing tree had we NOT taken the bloody hike.

It's the tradition in our family that whenever it's someone's birthday, they get to choose the family activity for the day. Not being great lovers of the outdoors, the only way my husband gets us to enjoy the great outdoors is to play this birthday card once a year. Inevitably, he chooses a family hike.

We've done it for the last few years, with mixed results. The first year, he chose what was probably an amateur hike, but it involved a lot of climbing over rocks and through grass. While my daughter embraced her inner mountain goat and my son used his former Boy Scout training, all I had was visions of sprained ankles while making a mental note of the various treatments I'd read about for poison ivy. About mid-way through the hike, I was whispering my mantra of “I hate this, I hate this” and, although not begrudging my husband his choice of activity, wasn't too happy with it, either.

Last year was better, since DH chose a paved hike through a state park which had been the mansion of some tycoon. The path was wide enough for parents with strollers and although not the most scenic, provided us all with several hours worth of exercise. Momma was happy.

Yesterday we drove 2 hours with the goal being to hike along a river. The website my husband got directions from was misleading, at best, and agonizingly frustrating. When we finally arrived at the State Park and asked a ranger for directions to the easiest trail, he said there weren't any that wouldn't result in a search party being dispatched to find us later. Dandy. We finally did find a decent trail, but the climb it entailed left even my extremely fit daughter panting.

I can see that while hiking isn't my thing (we all HATE the tick checks we have to do after being in the woods), walking is. I like seeing Nature, from a safe distance, while getting exercise and enjoying a beautiful Spring day. And even though trekking through the wild isn't my idea of a good time, it's certainly not too much to suck it up once a day for my spouse's birthday.

And to my husband, who does not read anything I write online, should he decided to finally click on this blog: HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

The Crock-Pot - One Of Mom's Best Friends

2014-05-31T09:46:00.000-04:00

Summertime means we're getting BUSY...camps, the pool, day trips. Thinking about dinner isn't something I really want to do, so the appliance I most treasure in the world continues to work for me during the summer: the crockpot.

Even before I had kids, I marveled at this low-wattage miracle device which allowed me to, literally, throw in a bunch of ingredients (2 points if I get the carrots in) and after a long day at work, come home to a hot, delicious meal. Even if I had errands or chores (shoveling snow, for example), the food usually didn't burn and if it did, it wasn't a lot. I'd walk in to a house so fragrant, one would swear someone had been cooking all day just for my pleasure.

Now that I have kids and a husband who works long hours, I still rely on the crock-pot for its simplicity and convenience. The devices are fairly inexpensive (in the $20 to $150 range) and the one I have has a 4-quart capacity which is perfect for my family. To learn more about choosing a slow-cooker, visit About.com (http://cookingequipment.about.com/od/slowcooker1/a/Aboutslowcooker.htm). Also, since I'm a renowned culinary disaster, I redeem myself with this appliance.

Here are three of my favorite recipes:

Turkey Chili

I make this at least once a week because my son loves it and it freezes well. Come to think of it, most of the crock-pot dishes I make freeze well...

Ingredients:

1-1/2 to 2 pounds of ground turkey

2 15.5 cans of drained black beans

1 28 oz. can of crushed tomatoes (I'd use diced tomatoes, but the boy can't stand tomato chunks.)

1 or 2 packages of chili mix (depending on how spicy I want it)

1 40 oz. can of drained red kidney beans

Directions:

Spray the inside of the pot with cooking spray.
Add all ingredients and set on the Low setting to cook for about 8 hours.
Stir periodically.

Variations: I've added some canned corn and frozen chopped spinach, served it over brown rice, and thrown a tablespoon or two of sour cream and diced Mexican cheese on top just for fun. To stretch it, add a can of Hormel chili.

–

Turkey Meatloaf

Again, an easy-peasy recipe that yields the filling for an amazing sandwich the next day.

Ingredients:

2 pounds of ground turkey

2 eggs, beaten (or 1/3 cup of liquid egg whites)

¾ cup of milk or water

3/4 cup dry breadcrumbs (I use whole wheat ones)

1 cup of ketchup

Directions:

Spray the inside of the pot with cooking spray.
In a large bowl, combine the eggs, milk or water, breadcrumbs, and meat. Mix thoroughly and shape into a large ball. The ball should be large enough that it won't touch the sides of the pot.
Place the ball into the pot and add about ½ cup of water.
Pour the ketchup over the top and cook on Low for 6 to 8 hours.

Variations: To get extra vegetables into my son, I've added a jar of babyfood – squash or sweet potatos work well. You may need to increase the amount of breadcrumbs by ½ cup if you do this.

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Chicken Soup

Ingredients:

1 to 2 cups of shredded chicken (I use thighs because they're cheaper than breasts.)

1 cup of water

2 cups of frozen, diced vegetables (Generic ones from the grocery store work fine, just be careful what they have in them. If there's a lima bean in the assortment, my kids won't touch the soup.)

6 cups of chicken broth or 6 chicken bouillon cubes

leftover rice or pasta, if you have any

salt and pepper to taste

Directions:

Put all of the ingredients in the slow cooker and cook on Low for 6 to 8 hours. Taste periodically and adjust the seasonings to whatever you like.

I've served this over rice, added leftover vegetables and had fun with this recipe. Ask a young child to help – they love it.

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For more crock-pot recipes, visit the following sites:

CookingLight.com – Here's the link to a whopping 105 slow-cooker recipes: http://www.cookinglight.com/food/top-rated-recipes/slow-cooker-favorites-00400000038588/

Spoonful.com – This link has 30 recipes: http://spoonful.com/recipes/slow-cooker-recipes

Chef-In-Training.com – Nikki lists 50 recipes here: http://www.chef-in-training.com/2012/08/50-slow-cooker-recipes

CrockpotLadies.com – They list an Apple Pie Moonshine that sounds compelling. Their link is http://crockpotladies.com

About.com – Linda Larsen has a great article on 5-ingredient recipes here: http://busycooks.about.com/od/fiveingredientsorles1/a/5ingredient.htm

Foodnetwork.com – Probably the best cooking site for cooking. Their Slow Cooker Collection can be found at http://www.foodnetwork.com/search/delegate.do?fnSearchString=slow+cooker&fnSearchType=site

Should I Worry About My Teen And Alcoholism

2014-05-22T15:49:00.003-04:00

Please note that although I was compensated for writing this post, all opinions expressed are purely mine. I mean teens and alcohol? They don't mix. It's pretty simple.

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At the tender age of 13, my son has a lot of firsts to look forward to: his first kiss, the first time he gets behind the wheel of a car, and his first sip of alcohol. While all are thrilling, it's the latter first experience that I'm concerned with.

The statistics make me worry. According to the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism (http://www.niaaa.nih.gov):

A person who begins drinking as a young teen is four times more likely to develop alcohol addiction than someone who waits until adulthood to use alcohol.
A national survey indicated that one in five 8^th graders report drinking alcohol within the past month.
17% of 8^th graders say they've gotten drunk at least once in the past year.

Does one sip of beer mean Junior will slip into alcoholism? No, but some studies have indicated that family members of alcoholics (we have at least two in the family) are three to four times more likely to develop the disease than people who do not have alcoholic family members (source: http://www.alcoholic.org/research/is-alcoholism-inherited). And individuals who are closely related to an alcoholic may have a more positive reaction to alcoholic drinks, possibly because they have a gene which makes the substance more pleasurable, thus increasing the likelihood of addiction. In fact, scientists suggest that alcoholism has a genetic component involving as many as 39 genes!

According to the experts at Advanced Health and Education in New Jersey who specialize in treating adult and adolescent addictions, there are multiple signs of alcohol abuse and dependence including:

Neglecting responsibilities, like school and family.
Relationship issues like fights with family and loved ones or the loss of old friends.
Changing one's plans so that life revolves around planning where and when to get the next drink (for example, which teen party is more likely to serve alcohol).
Making plans on how to recover from a binge.
Physical withdrawal symptoms which can include anxiety and jumpiness, shaking and trembling, sweating, nausea, insomnia, depression, fatigue and the loss of appetite in the absence of the alcohol.

Alcohol abuse also increases the likelihood of at-risk behaviors like driving under the influence, having unprotected sex, and getting arrested for disorderly conduct and theft (source: http://www.advhealth.com/conditions/alcohol-abuse-treatment).

So how can parents decrease the chances that teens will wind up in alcohol rehab and need the alcohol treatment centers? Well, if you've been modeling good behavior (as in not getting drunk or planning your evening based on which restaurants serve alcohol), that's a start. Having a relationship in which open communication is encouraged is another (for a great pamphlet from National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism, click here: http://pubs.niaaa.nih.gov/publications/children.pdf). More tips include:

Make the discussion about alcohol a conversation, rather than a lecture. Control your emotions if you hear something you disagree with and make every discussion a “win-win” experience by respecting your kid's viewpoint.
Give your child the simple facts about alcohol. These include the fact that it's a dangerous drug that slows down the body and mind; that beer and wine are not “safer” than hard liquor; that anyone, including teens, can develop an addiction to alcohol; and that alcohol abuse and addiction can produce impairments in memory even after only a few drinks (source: www.advhealth.com/conditions/alcohol-abuse-treatment).
Set clear, realistic expectations for your child including one which says that you expect him/her not to drink until they're of legal age. Establish appropriate consequences for breaking that rule and be prepared to consistently enforce it, if need be.
Let him/her know that there are lots of reasons for them not to drink (like the fact they're more likely to do something embarrassing when they're under the influence, they're too smart to need the crutch that alcohol provides, that it's illegal, and that it's toxic to their bodies).
Give them the tools to resist peer pressure. Some responses to being offered a drink could include: “No thanks,” “I don't feel like it,” “I actually prefer soda,” “I just don't drink,” and “I said 'no' so stop pressuring me.”

Sure, there are treatments for alcoholism and, God knows, there are plenty of alcohol rehabilitation centers should adolescents go down that path. But as parents, we obviously want to prevent that. The dialogue about alcohol was started with my son years ago. The trick is not to assume he internalized the knowledge that my husband and I, as well as the school, gave him. There's a big difference between talking about that first sip, Junior actually taking it and when, as well as what happens after that. It's worth my concern.

Parents Of Teens: You Need To Know About TeenCentral.Net, A SAFE Place For Teens

2014-05-06T10:04:00.001-04:00

It seems that every day we, as parents, are warned about the dangers facing teens on the Internet. Rare is it that we hear about a positive site aimed at these kids. I'm proud to have found one: TeenCentral (www.teencentral.net). This website is sponsored by KidsPeace, a non-profit organization dedicated to helping children in crisis. It allows kids to post anonymously, was developed by experts in teen counseling and psychology, is professionally monitored, and provides “a password-protected, safe cyberspace for teens to work out their issues.”

Teens have a lot of options here: from writing their own stories (anonymously), to listening to teen podcasts, and exploring and learning about topics like:

Bullying
How To Quit Smoking (Do kids REALLY need this?!)
Alcohol Awareness
Growing Up Military
Interfaith (where kids can learn about different faiths)
Domestic Violence
Dating Violence
Weight Issues

One of the coolest features is the Search-O-Matic where young adults can search by a keyword. So, for example, if a teen types in the word “parents,” any teen stories that feature “parents” comes up. These could be stories about parents favoring one child over another, divorce, parents who promised music lessons but didn't follow through, etc.

Kids can also share videos on Teen Central, however they are warned that because the site values anonymously and safety, it will “not post any video that contains your actual name, where you live or any contact information such as email address or phone numbers.” Furthermore, they stress that “if you submit a video that you are visible in, people will see your face and therefore will be able to identify you.”

There's also a section called Just Ask Me that features a series of videos called “More Than Just Sex” and was created by Community Healthcare Network's Teens P.A.C.T. program in New York City. These videos are targeted to empower teens to make positive decisions, create social change, and positively impact the rates of teen pregnancy, STD's and HIV.

Lastly, the site features links to national and international help lines, thus ensuring that help for troubled teens is only a phone call away.

Kids can register on TeenCentral for free in order to gain full access to the entire site. Since it's interactive, it stores what they tell it and customizes topics to their life. BUT since it's totally anonymous, teens can feel free to share what's going on in their lives and because email addresses are not given, no one can track the kids down or spam them.

Pass this website’s address on to a teen you love. And if you'd like to learn more about KidsPeace, visit http://www.kidspeace.org.

Note: A version of this post first appeared on the site www.thegeekparent.com and also appears on my other site http://isithotinheremmm.blogspot.com.

Blogging About Teens Is A Combustible Thing

2014-02-21T20:20:00.001-05:00

Teens are like fireworks - ready to explode!

Recently, a friend on Facebook was lamenting about how difficult the teenage years are for parents and how, in stark contrast to the number of women blogging about their kids' younger years, there aren't that many of us blogging about the teens. I often mention Junior, who is 13, but I understand why there aren't more of us writing covering this time of life; there are multiple reasons, including, but not limited to:

We're busy because kids at this age are busy. I'm driving Junior to friends' houses, activities, etc.
In addition to our teen, we often have other kids, and keeping the family in check is hard. Schedules are, once again, hectic and trying to keep track of who is where is a challenge.
The potential to wound your kids psychologically is enormous, never more so than when they're teens. This embarrassment factor, which can be fun and powerful, can also be damaging to parent-teen relationships. As parents, we realize that our time with these changlings is extremely limited and I, for one, don't want to mess that up by ticking Junior off too badly.
They're volatile and bat-shit crazy at this age. Their hormones are racing around, their bodies are topsy-turvy, their relationships are confusing and there's a lot of pressure at school. Basically, they're tornadoes with legs. Who wants to unnecessarily be on the wrong end of that?
What goes on the Web, even if it's taken down, stays on the Web. I, for one, don't want to say the wrong thing which can somehow become a permanent part of Junior's digital footprint.
Kids change less quickly during the teenage years than when they were toddlers. The changes are ultimately larger, but they can also be more subtle and less observable when you're with the kids on a daily basis.
Parents of these kids may be in denial. I don't want to think about Junior growing up and moving away and if I don't write about it, then I don't have to face it...until it becomes absolutely necessary.
Many people re-enter the workforce (as I'm trying to do) when their kids become teens and just don't have the time.

So I, for one, choose to write about my teen in limited doses, focusing more on how the changes in him affect me, how they're a part of my parenting journey. These are bittersweet years, unlike the predominately joyful first few; they are to be savored and sometimes, just endured.

No, there aren't as many moms writing about teens, so listen to those of us who do (and remember that in addition to the blog you're reading right now, I write another one: http://isithotinheremmm.blogspot.com). Even if your kid is little, your time is coming. Learn from those us in the midst right now. And bring cookies.