Mom's Whimsy

A sort of vacation and not being tickled...

2011-06-02T08:26:00.000-07:00

Does this picture give you the hee bee jeebies? Imagine this, a delightful view to Menemsha pond in a beautiful house. The long grass swaying in the breeze...infested with ticks!! I walked through said grass and collected 2 in my shoe. Ken had 2 attached to him and we brought 3 home in the car! Can you say YUCK and not only yuck but the diseases they carry are no joke. Here is a list...Lyme disease, human granulocytic and monocytic ehrlichiosis, babesiosis, relapsing fever, Rocky Mountain spotted fever, Colorado tick fever, tularemia, Q fever.

So, enough for the heebee's...I have to say that I should have modified my attitude about going on "vacation" for 3 days. It took 1 full day to pack. Once we got there, we had our rigid 2 nap schedule to adhere to and one very bouncy almost 4 year old (who became even more bouncy with each ice cream cone). It was a task in coordination of nap times and organizing stuff. To add to it the house we stayed in was generously loaned to us but had a problem with the hot water heater. This is not a big deal but we kept leaving stuff at the other house which was a logistical nightmare. I'm remembering the days of lounging on the deck, having a leisurely walk on the beach (insert screeching noise here). Instead I was playing family with my big girl. Her version of family is to order you around and she is always in charge. Our walk on the beach was running to and fro to the ocean to collect water for her sand castle. There was a large group of great people to socialize with over dinner but instead we were putting our littlest to bed and racing back and forth between houses to join in the festivities and collecting ticks in our shoes. When I asked Ken if he was having a good time, there was a long pause and then a "sort of".And now, I'm still doing the laundry and we're leaving for VT tomorrow. I don't want to go! It is enough of a logistical dilemma to stay at home........

Poopology

2011-05-24T07:47:00.000-07:00

So, this week I'm going to write about poop. We thought J was trained but she has some curious toiletry habits. Our dear girl waits too long to poo, does a "little nugget" in her pants and keeps on going. Sometimes she tells us, sometimes she doesn't. Usually, when she does tell us she screams out loudly "Mommy, I pooped in my pants." Imagine the response of the staff in a restaurant or the playground. I thereupon need to take her to the side, go on a fishing expedition for the "nugget" and then put her on the potty where she completes the job. Then she says, "Mommy, you need to wipe my butt, butt butt!" She loves to say the word butt or buchee (translation butt cheek) also in a loud voice. So, this house in inundated with poo in the pants and rear end terminology. Try this at home, yell "poop" very loudly. Do you notice how the sound carries?

J has now developed a poop complex. We were so used to poop success that both K and I are getting frustrated. So, when J has a successful poop she says "Mommy, are you happy." So now, she is pooping in the toilet and looking to please us rather than do it because it is unpleasant to have a nugget stuck in her pants. It is so hard to explain to a almost 4 year old about poop and how it can make you sick. So, I explained the mechanics of pooping using a tube of toothpaste. Imagine me, sitting in the bathroom and explaining how poop is stored in a sack in your body and holding Dora the explorer toothpaste, squeezing out the paste to simulate poo. Yes, lovely! So, there it is, the science of poopology!

Pictures of the week

Whole Paycheck!

Mommy, am I bigger than the cat?

Did I poison her?

2011-05-17T07:41:00.000-07:00

It all started when we realized that the millet tasted weird...I mean really weird. The kind of weird that leaves that back of your throat dry and your nose wrinkling up to your eyeballs. The thing is, she ate it..the baby that is! We had mixed the millet with something else and I had (like a good Mommy) tasted it before giving it to her and yes, it tasted a bit odd. BUT, I was distracted because I was thinking about the phone call from my Mom, who was crying. There I was in the midst of the kitchen, baby food slung all over baby's face and clothes thinking about my poor Mom. Julia was making her usual curious demands (I want it cut in triangles, I want to sit next to you Mommy, I want to do my puzzle) and Ken was talking about a potential renter for our second home. And baby H, was just opening her mouth as I spooned the horrible mixture and opening again and again.....

So, in short we didn't poison her. The grinder we used for the millet had wet mold in it that got thoroughly cooked, killing all the potentially harmful organisms within. I called the doctor twice who kept assuring me that she would throw up within the next 12 hours if it was indeed "bad". In the meantime, I recreated the cooking of the millet and figured out where we went wrong and even ate some of the millet myself to see if I would throw up too! (the doctor thought this was crazy thinking!)

All of this brought home to me the HUGE responsibility one has of being a parent. Do you notice how we just live our lives not thinking of these things and then something like this happens and then WHAMO. This innocent baby doesn't know any better. She will indeed eat what I give her. It could be arsenic or something.

Have you ever fed your baby something bad, accidentally hit their head on the open trunk, spilled hot liquid on them or anything like this before? If so, please share your story.

Picture of the week is below. I hope my daughter doesn't always have to wear a helmet when doing a doodle.

Change

2011-05-10T11:17:00.000-07:00

A lot of STUFF is going on in my head right now and I'm not ready to share it on this blog YET. Let's say that I'm percolating like some good coffee. I'm trying to figure out my career and I must say that everything is so complicated when you have children and having 2 is 2x as complex. I wish that the complexity was more exciting but it really is a matter of..have we paid that bill, what's for dinner and holy cr%$p you went to Whole Foods and bought THAT! I think there is a movie called "it's complicated" which was a pretty sexy movie. My version of complex is not sexy...my version hasn't even taken a shower yet.

Okay, so back to career. I think that life really changes when you have kids. I find myself thinking that if I need to be away from them...it better pay well and it better be meaningful. And, yup here it comes my death thing...at 40, I'm thinking about the end. What will I be saying to myself about my life right now at the age of 80. It feels like a great time to make a career change but at the same time a complicated time and then again I think I'm too old to do it. Then I realize that I get to make the rules here...who said it was too late to do anything? So, blogites, I'll let you know what happens on this career thing...I'll know in a few months.

In the meantime I'm a walking sleep drunk. They say that when you haven't slept...it's like being inebriated...this is on the topic of driving. Well, Ms. Haley has not really turned into the sleeper I had hoped. I average 6 hours of sleep a night and never do I get more than 6. The little "bumble bee" knows when I get to bed early and wakes up for an hour in the middle of the night and then gets up at 5am with the birdies. For a while there, I forgot how to sleep but I'm back on track now. I can barely get out of bed in the middle of the night to feed the munchkin. Haley, when you read this...remember how devoted I was to you!

Here are some pictures of the one man of the house, bathing the girls. It is the cutest thing ever. And thus, it is all worth it!

Catastrophe Mind!

2011-03-15T11:48:00.000-07:00

There I am pushing the stroller across the street and I can vividly imagine the car hitting the stroller and carrying my infant daughter off to her death. I see people falling off ladders and smashing into us, hot liquid being spilled, small objects being caught in little throats, strings strangling. All around me are hazards that might hurt my little girls. I have imagined catasrophes before they have even happened. I was told that this is normal brain weirdness for mom's...a mechanism to protect one's children. But...I'll tell you it is a slice of hell as I wince just imagining how incredibly horrible it would be if anything happened to my precious children.

Every morning I marvel as I look at my 2 children at how lucky I am to have them in my life. From the delighted worble when my 8 month old sees me in the morning to the ritualistic handing out of bears to K and myself in the morning from our 3.5 years old. The love I feel for these girls fills my heart to overflowings of wonder, joy, amazement and love.

When I hear about the losses of our Japanese friends...I cannot imagine how I might feel if I lost any member of my family. I cannot begin the comprehend the horror of seeing one's child swept away by water...the last contact being the clasp of hands and the hope of survival. Life as we know it could change in one instant yet we live as if this isn't so.

Whining = WINE!

2011-02-22T08:26:00.000-08:00

Is she sick? Are my husband and I creating some kind of tension to warrant all this noise? I think I've placed my hand on her head 5 times a day to check for a fever. But no, she is 3 1/2!!! According to her teachers, this type of behavior is age appropriate. J is in between being a baby and being self-reliant. I guess it doesn't help to have a baby in the house. From morning 'til night for the last 3 days, we've had whining most days and a number of full blown tantrums. This morning she lay on the floor and screamed because she couldn't put her "magna tiles" in the middle of the kitchen table during breakfast. Last night, it was because she wanted to sit next to Mommy. There's no in between. It is situation = screaming/whining with no intermediate stage. What happened to my cooperative girl?

I think I'm going to buy some circus music for the morning routine. It consists of me chasing her around with various articles of clothing and she deciding she doesn't like my clothing choices. All accompanied by the horrible sounds from the video above. Then when we're all ready to go she announces that she doesn't want to go to preschool..she doesn't LIKE it...she DOESN'T WANT to go. Once we get there however, she barely pays attention to me as she skips off to be with her friends. Maybe I should just wear headphones with the circus music for the whole morning. I have a very good sense of humor and I often catch her eye during the middle of all this shenanigans and make a joke and we laugh together. It's all a farce of course. She knows it and so do I. In that moment of the joke, I see my girl again who I'm very bonded with. As you can see, the video above is kind of a joke too. I had her watch it and she laughed at her own whining. But when I've had 5 hours of sleep a night for the last 3 nights (thanks to baby), it's hard to find the humor!

Yes, I need a glass of wine and some more sleep. And YES, I love being her Mom. I can see the girl beneath the "whine facade".

(For all you Moms out there reading this, how do you manage the whining?)

How an 80's Mom amuses herself!

2011-02-13T06:44:00.000-08:00

Michael Jackson has extended his reach to children who will never know him. Everytime I watch this video I giggle as Haley is just keeping the beat. Next we'll try moonwalking!

I needed a decaf!

2011-02-07T11:27:00.000-08:00

I am happily sitting in my orderly house thanks to the cleaners, my baby is asleep and I have meditated for 20 minutes. Hallelulah!

Wind time back to 8:30am and imagine a 3 year old kicking and screaming on the steps refusing to put her shoes on. Now imagine the walk out the door where I almost fell on the ice, couldn't open the door of the car because of the snow drift and knocked the trash cans over as I backed out of the driveway. (Thanks to some kind passerby who took pity on me...and picked up the trash cans).

Let's move on to the fact that I lost my wallet sometime last week and have yet to locate it. If you've ever lost your wallet, you know how central a wallet's contents are to day to day life. It is nowhere to be found and I think the credit cards eloped and maybe they're making money somewhere. Let's hope that I find the wallet full of cash in my closet.

So, in summary it has been a very hectic day so far. Not to mention the 3 trips I took to a tag sale yesterday where I purchased a flat screen TV for under $200, 2 steamer trunks and a chest of drawers. The woman who had the tag sale was selling everything in her house and she was crying during most of my visits. The first visit I didn't have cash (and no wallet) so I had to go home for the cash and for the third trip I was so upset that I forgot the remote for the TV. The second trip consisted of me walking into the dining room and buying the TV from the daughter who was watching it with her friends while the woman sat in a chair crying with 6 close friends nodding sympathetically. I was the only buyer/stranger in the house and I felt like I took the TV away...I mean it was still warm when I put it in the car. I was so frazzled that Ken went out and bought us a bottle of wine. (I had 1 glass and felt kind of drunk).

And I might add that last night we only got 5 hours of sleep. Haley's new wake up time is 4:45am and she has woken up at this exact time for the last 3 days. She is getting another cold so cried from the moment we went to bed at 11pm until midnight. Poor sweet girl.

So, when I went to get my latte this morning...I decided that it had better be decaf!

SnOw!!!

2011-01-27T11:41:00.000-08:00

We've had a foot of new snow. Pretty soon we won't be able to walk or drive down our street. Here is a photo of our sledding adventure today!

If it doesn't rain it snows

2011-01-26T11:29:00.000-08:00

Do you like my metaphor? It's been 2 weeks of endless snow and seemingly endless mishaps. It all started when after our foot of snow a few weeks ago, I decided to take the stroller and walk to J's preschool. Well, I didn't make it very far along the path when I was blocked by a huge drift of snow. I then had to walk on the street. A woman stopped her car to yell at me for endangering the life of my children. We made it into the city and then I decided that since Haley was crying and not napping that I would walk from Harvard to Davis Square. I know...duh! On a positive note, there were seemingly endless pairs of hands to help me lift the stroller over all the snow banks I encountered. By the time I got home my feet were soaked as I had left my good pair of snow boots in VT. I forgot that all the salt would melt the snow leaving foot deep puddles of water at each street crossing.

In the meantime, poor H was getting sicker and sicker. We brought her to our pediatrician on MLK day and back again the next day. We agreed that her breathing was too fast and she sounded like a veteran smoker. Off to the hospital we went for a chest x-ray and sure enough she had the signs of pneumonia. I thought about taking a photo of our little baby's body on the huge x-ray machine...poor girl. Antibiotics cleared her right up but let's not forget the week we had of virtually no sleep.

On the mechanical front, the car decided to kick it up a notch. Last Tuesday when we had an important meeting, we all piled into the car and lo and behold it didn't start. Another snow storm was upon us and K raced off with Julia in one stroller and I wasn't too far behind with the other. We had it jump started on Thursday and took it to the dealer. It needed a part which should be in by Friday. Friday brought more snow so I didn't go to the dealer that day. I went to start the car on Sunday and nothing...called AAA and then again on Monday...called AAA. Finally the car is now fixed and starts with a lovely roar.

Let's hope that all these antics are behind us but we are expecting to get maybe a foot of snow again today. I feel the beginnings of not feeling well settle into the bottom of my stomach. I'm hoping it turns into nothing...perhaps it is just stress!

So, if it doesn't rain it snows!!!

A tree outside our condo

A view of our street

H in her new office

The Yin and Yang of Packing

2011-01-07T17:19:00.001-08:00

Today was a different kind of day...I PACKED THE CAR! Yes, I did it all by myself. I have some observations about packing strategies Man Vs. Woman.

Man = I'll pack everything I can and cram it into whatever container no matter what else is in it. I will do it very very fast so we can get out of here pronto.

Woman = I might be slow but everything is planned for and organized so we can find things at the other end. I will become maniacal about order.

Man and Woman pack and organize together = WAR.

I'll admit that I am so far from perfect when packing that I even annoy myself. I'm slow and methodical but I also get hung up on suddenly cleaning something irrelevant (like the curtains). I'm pretty grouchy about it too and will insist upon doing some irrelevant task whilst K gnashes his teeth as he runs out the door to fling something else in the car. However, in my mind I put everything that is baby in one bag (except the baby) and everything that is electronic in another bag. Here is a typical conversation:

Me: Where is the camera?

K: It's in with the oranges

Me: Oh!

Me: Where is my toilet kit

K: Oh, I put that in with my shoes

Me: K, I can't find the baby wipes

K: Oh yeah, it's between the baby seats in the back

You get the idea. I also would like to make one more observation about stuff and Men. Why does he insist on leaving his shoes on the bed when unpacking. Didn't Mom always say to not jump on the bed with your shoes on?

Nothing but a sock with a hole in it

2011-01-04T12:04:00.000-08:00

I mistakenly put on a pair of Ken's old wool socks and noticed that one of them had multiple holes eaten by our VT mice. Of course, I could have changed said sock but with so little time....well, so it stayed on my foot most of the day. A couple of interesting observations are as follows: As I was walking around the condo in my socks the floor felt wet. Then when I brought my attention to the feeling of wet, I noticed that the floor was just cold. And for a moment out of my task driven life, my foot had my full attention. Or more succinctly, the bottom of my foot making contact with the floor had my full attention. (Hmmm, where to go with this story now as in writing this my daughter started to cry and I was on my hands and knees rocking her for 10 minutes and she is still AWAKE!)

I guess the relevant aspect of my above observation is that I need to meditate or something. I must miss a lot of things during the day that are quite wonderful if I metaphorically wear a sock over my head. So, I was thinking that maybe I should stop and meditate at the church where my daughter goes to daycare every morning or night for 10 minutes. Maybe this might help? My day seems to unfold unpredictably that I can never seem to plan for anything but if I piggyback on something that I already do? I now understand why Moms with kids under 5 can never do anything for themselves. And, as we speak the H--monster has resumed her crying. (uggghhh). Doesn't she understand that I have things to do a schedule to keep. And speaking of schedules, if she naps now, she'll wake up at 4:40 and how the heck am I going to pick up my oldest daughter and get my meat share which is the opposite direction of the Church. Meat or Daughter...hmm which should I choose.

Below are some pictures of our growing family. Poor H hasn't had a lot of picture publicity. Does she look fatter now that she is on the 1 avocado a day regime. And notice Daddy at the bottom....you might wonder why is he rolling his eyes. Is it something I said?

Sleep?

2010-12-15T13:34:00.000-08:00

I am writing this post from a completely sleep deprived state. I am having trouble differentiating between what I'm thinking and what I've said. I constantly start off sentences with....I don't know if I told you this already but.... Poor Ken has heard things over and over again. I also find that I say things that pop into my head without editing them first. The other day, I was talking to my friend Roy. I happen to glance at the phone tree for my daughter's daycare which had the word "message" written on it. So, I said the word message right in the middle of the sentence I was speaking. There was a pause and Roy said "message?" It's a little scary.

This has been a very challenging week so far with sleep among other conundrums. We started off the weekend with a date (oh boy) and then a holiday party on Sunday. We brought Ms. Haley (who refuses the bottle) along for obvious reasons. She was passed around and cooed at and then I noticed that she seemed hot...then hotter. We called the doctor who said she needed a temperature. Ken ran across the street to CVS and there we were sticking the thermometer up her butt right in the middle of the party. Temp = 103.5. We were advised to go to the ER. From Party to ER in the space of 1 hour. They poked, they prodded and proclaimed a double ear infection after removing the wax from her ear. The next day, I took her to our doctor who didn't detect any ear infection. It was simply some random virus. So, ear wax removal = $100!

While at the doctor's I was told that Julia did indeed have UTI #4. This might explain the constant whining from the poor girl. She hit her Dad a number of times at dinner last night (Totally out of character I might add) which prompted her to be put to bed at 7pm whereupon she fell dead asleep. Ms. Haley was up every 2 hours all night long. I brought Julia home from daycare after lunch hoping to nap her but the little hooligan sounded like she was having a drunken brawl in her room. She sang, took off her leggings, kicked the wall, threw her stuffed animals against the wall and the started yelling "I'm hungry" (this is a new ploy to not sleep that she's been using at bedtime). One banana later and a bribe of a chocolate if she did indeed nap...there is silence and Ms. Haley has also fallen asleep. I can't believe I bribed my daughter with chocolate!!

I am not intending to complain about my life or my daughters. It has simply just been a rough week so far. On a positive note, I've lost a few more pounds. Our Christmas tree is up and I am still thinking about our 1.5 hour date on Saturday night without children. Our neighbors babysat a sleeping Julia and a crying Haley who just wanted the boob the whole time. By the time we got home, she (Haley) was hysterical but our neighbors didn't call us because they wanted us to enjoy our time out (bless them!). When I saw all the college students being carded on the way in...it reminded me of my 20's and a life that was so far different than it is now. How my life has changed...for the better I might add!

If you are reading this winding blog...have a Happy whatever you celebrate. I am trying to focus on the fact that things in life don't bring joy...it is the experiences. This way I won't buy too much junk that I don't need.

over and out......

Note to self - this is what sleep looks like

What is a cupie doll?

2010-11-10T19:37:00.000-08:00

Well readers...I'm short on time today so thought it would be fun to make my oldest child look like a cupie doll since I get so many comments that my baby looks like one. So, what do you think?

Hmmm...not quite hunh?

Anyway, I am sitting here at my kitchen table smelling the fragrant cat box and once again contemplating why I have a cat with a kidney problem. I just cleaned the darn thing yesterday...or was it the day before. My husband did some cleaning of the kitchen so has left the signature dirty sponge on the kitchen table. (I can't really complain as I don't screw the tops back on things). The girls are asleep and I should be since I have this hacking cough thanks to preschool germs. However, we are heading up to VT and the list of to do's is long. Clean the cat box, laundry, pick up the house, pack, blah blah blah. It will be nearly impossible to do it tomorrow with a 3 year old running around so I tried to do it tonight (unsuccessfully). My one reflection is that laundry is a pain in the neck as once it is all cleaned it takes forever to fold it and put it away. Have you ever just left your clean laundry in the bin and worn it all week...it gets awfully confusing. So, that's my small post for today...I don't have any deep thoughts to share except, that cat box stinks!!

Floaters in the tub

2010-11-02T19:07:00.000-07:00

I know, it's an odd title for a blog post. But hold on...this will morph into a story worth reading...I promise. This post is about the problem with perfection and it is related to my daughter pooping in the tub.

Wind back to earlier tonight. The kitchen is overflowing with dishes and I'm trying to get out the door to vote. We've eaten dinner and piled more dishes atop of the breakfast dishes. Ken puts Julia in the tub and starts cleaning the kitchen...the tub is a hope for respite as Julia is cranky...very cranky. She missed her nap today. All of a sudden there is a desperate cry from the tub and Julia is standing and 2 brown floaters are evident in the tub. I pick up my dear girl and put her on the toilet and give her a big hug. She just clings to me...terrified of her poo poo I think. I tell her, "it's okay...it's just an accident." (side note here is that Ken and I exchanged glances and I had to run out to vote leaving him to deal with the "brown trout").

I just don't give myself enough hugs. When I do something wrong, I'm so hard on myself. Not to be gross but I will be...Julia didn't mean to poop in the tub. Sometimes I say the wrong thing or do the wrong thing. We all do! Other people are much more forgiving of our imperfections than we might think. I realized today that I am modeling for Julia that when she does something wrong, it's okay. Hopefully, when she is an adult she will be kind to herself. A therapist of mine once said...when we are stressed or upset...we all go home. Hopefully, she will go home to a hug. I guess I can't be a perfect parent either.

So, enough about poop. We've had a wonderful Halloween. Julia went on a parade with her school through Harvard Square on Friday. We visited with some friends on Saturday and Sunday and then Sunday night we went trick or treating with our neighbors downstairs. We are emerging from our baby haze...Haley is regulating herself and getting on a schedule. She is constantly smiling now. When I go to pick her up she lifts her head and tries to sit up to meet my arms. She looks positively merry. It is really amazing to me how everyone smiles when they see a baby. I think it makes people realize the wonder of life. It is a weird thing to think that this baby has only been alive for 3 months now. A truly miraculous phenomenon.