Mormon Mommy Blogs

Discussion Wednesday - YW/YM Mid-Week Activities

noreply@blogger.com (Mormon Mommy Blogs) — Wed, 08 Feb 2012 12:00:00 +0000

I have been a Youth Leader on and off for years and have always felt like Sunday was the most important meeting that I wanted my youth to attend. That is where they will feel the Spirit the very most and if they came to the mid-week activity? That's "gravy."

Not everyone feels the same.

I also have two teenagers aged thirteen and seventeen. The seventeen year old is so busy with AP classes, homework and her job that I have adopted the "gravy" attitude with her. She goes to her Sunday meetings, the firesides and other Gospel Centered ones but not Wednesday night and I'm OK with it. My son attends his mid-week activities because he is only a deacon and still working on his Eagle Scout Award. He is not so busy that he can't benefit from the interaction with the other youth.

I personally feel like the mid week activities are wasting a lot of time with superfluous stuff that frankly are not only disorganized but down right silly at times. Playing tag in the mall? What Gospel Principal are they learning from that?

I understand the need to socialize with other youth her age, however for us? We have chosen to pick our battles, and Wednesday Night is not one of them.

How 'bout you guys?

What are your feelings about the Mid Week activities that the youth have?

Lets Discuss.

Ready. Set. Comment.

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Word to Your Mother

noreply@blogger.com (Elisa) — Tue, 07 Feb 2012 18:20:00 +0000

I wish I would have gotten the "Mom Wisdom Box" punched up in heaven.

Instead I got "Mom Trial and Error Box".

Yeah. That's not as much fun.

Do I qualify for an upgrade yet?

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Kind Words - An Observation

noreply@blogger.com (Mormon Mommy Blogs) — Tue, 07 Feb 2012 10:00:00 +0000

I am no parenting expert, that much is so ridiculously obvious I really didn't even need to say it. But on occasion, I am capable of making an astute observation that helps me out in my chosen profession.

Before I became a parent, I would have sworn up and down, side to side and on a stack of chocolate that I would never yell at my children. Like, never ever.

*snort* Amateur.

While perhaps I may not be raise my voice all the time, and I certainly never yell mean and terrible things at them, on occasion the volume on my voice box does get away from me. Once I had done it, it was easy to do again. Seems like one you cross that line, it's so hard to back step across it.

Dang. I hereby vote for do-overs! And start-overs! And popovers! Wait....

But still, I try. I really do try.

One evening, as I was preparing dinner, the boys started going at it. They were flinging angry comments back and forth and it was escalating fast.

The girls decided they just couldn't be left out and had to throw in a few choice words of their own, which only fueled the situation.

I have taken to yelling above such noise to get every one's attention, but I really hate doing that. It does nothing to diffuse the situation, it only makes me upset and the kids, while they may break up the fighting, still remain in bad spirits. Still, it's often just the reaction that springs up.

Well on this particular night, I did something that I had no idea I was even going to do until I was doing it.

Speaking calmly and just loud enough to be heard so the kids knew I was talking, I said:

"You know, I think Alayna is really cute when she smiles."

A couple of the kids stopped yelling and turned to me.

"And I really think Jacob has the best laugh ever."

It was seriously incredible. At this point all of the kids stopped what they were doing and stood watching me, obviously waiting to hear what I was going to say about the next child.

"I think Joseph can say some of the sweetest things when he wants to."

A smile here, a giggle there.

"And Savannah is the best helper ever. She is just so great."

I said all this while still calmly preparing the food.

There were several seconds of silence before the kids turned back to each other. Savannah started doing her homework quietly, the boys went off to play, and Alayna went back to her coloring.

There really wasn't any kind of grand acknowledgement of what happened, except to myself. The kids stopped fighting, everyone was in a better mood, and I didn't even have to raise my voice.

Wow.

The power of kind words.

Do I do this all the time? No. Should I do this more often? Definitely. Will it work every time? Most likely not.

But it won't hurt to try.

"Be patient with yourself. Perfection comes not in this life, but in the next life. Don't demand things that are unreasonable, but demand of yourself improvement. As you let the Lord help you through that He will make the difference." - Elder Russell M. Nelson

Just sayin'.

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Serene is a mom of five crazy kiddos who blogs about all her parenting misadventures at Serene is my name, Not my life! She is also a freelance artist so be sure to view her portfolio page!

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Inside All of Us is a Little Hope We Can Share

noreply@blogger.com (Mormon Mommy Blogs) — Mon, 06 Feb 2012 19:36:00 +0000

After our request for people to submit questions for Sister Beck we were not only inundated with comments, but with hundreds and hundreds of emails.The majority of the private emails came from women who were in a lot of pain. Their lives were not turning out how they had envisioned them as a Young Woman and they did not know where to turn for hope.

Sure, the primary answer is "read your scritpures" but over-whelming those women stated they were doing that, but they still were not finding their much needed hope. For lack of a better analogy, the little piece of hope they are looking for is that straw that they can put in their nose to keep from drowning from life's problems. They know life is not meant to be "easy" and they are doing everything-- attending Relief Society, Women's Conference, Time Out for Women, reading their scriptures -- looking for that piece of hope to help them keep from drowning and they just aren't finding it.

As I read and re-read those private emails, my heart ached for these women. They opened themselves, looking for hope where they felt as though they were getting none. They know they can look to the scriptures and pray, however the pain was being caused by others in their lives and the choices they were making, which cannot be "fixed" by these women. Overwhelmingly the private emails dealt with women in abusive relationships and spouses and children heavily involved with Pornography.

These women felt shame, horror and embarrassment because of the choices their loved ones were making. They hear the voices of our prophets and apostles telling them to "stay away from Pornography, it's the plague" and to "fight fight fight for their families", and yet the plague is in their homes and they have no clue HOW to fight.

It's super easy for those of us who do not have a loved one using Pornography to say "it's not your fault" or "you should feel no guilt" or "you should feel no shame because it's not about YOU" or even worse "clamp down and take away all privileges and passwords."

Not helpful at all. And these good women feel ashamed; They feel guilt and they are very, very sad.

This is a silent burden that these women -- our sisters -- carry. They want to fight they just don't know how, where to turn or even whom they can trust. They love their family members that are ensnared, and they don't want you to think badly of them when they confide of their "hidden sorrow that they eye can't see." So they carry this burden alone. And because of that, they truly ARE alone in their fight to save their family.

After seeing all of the emails that came through-- some from women whose husbands are in prominent leadership positions within the church -- I feel as though we need to band together and fight this horrid battle together.

Our humanistic instinct when faced with these kind of problems is to Fight or Flight, however after interviewing several prominent therapists, I have come to realize that we may be fighting in ways that only furthers the shame and pushing the use of pornography further underground. Becoming control freaks does not, in anyway, actually fight the problem. It makes the woman the warden, and her spouse the prisoner and that is not a healthy environment for healing or marriage.

One thing the therapists that I interviewed all had in common was that we needed to take the "taboo-ness" out of Pornography, and healthy marital sexuality in general. We need to make it less about shaming and more about healing and understanding. Why? Because we can't effectively talk about it or support our sisters that are fighting this battle if our heart-beats accelerate when we hear the word PORNOGRAPHY. We can't support them or help OUR loved ones --who may be hiding because of shame -- if we are in denial that it is even an issue "in our community."

That is why I was so excited with this film project. They want to educate about the effects of pornography and take away the "taboo-ness" of this subject so that we can more effectively support each other. And fight.

Don't be afraid to watch the video. It's not scary. My heart didn't beat a million miles a minute and at the end of the movie, I felt compelled to share. This is a worth-while project, and they need our support.

I have also partnered with Michelle from Mormon Woman and we have been gathering articles and a very large network for women to rely on and go to for help and support. I am excited about the things that she is working on and ways that we can come together and support our sisters who are carrying this burden alone.

She has a wealth of information on her site with regards to this subject. She has met with wives of men who are in recovery, as well as men and they have shared their stories with her. LDS.org also has a wealth of information with regards to pornography as well as MANY trained therapists at LDS Family Services who are versed in how to fight this battle.

We can fight this battle, if we fight it together and this is our Call to Action.

If you want to help fight, consider embedding this video on your blog or Facebook page and then if you feel compelled, donate money to this fantastic cause. They can't make this movie without us, and frankly, we need more information like this available for people who are not only struggling with Pornography, but for those who love them.

I realized as I read those hundreds and hundreds of emails is that what these women ~~needed~~ wanted as some hope and inside each of us is a little hope that we can share with our sisters that are hurting.

Together we can populate the Internet with Hope. Won't you join us?

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Hollywood Presents: The Gospel

noreply@blogger.com (Mormon Mommy Blogs) — Mon, 06 Feb 2012 12:00:00 +0000

I LOVE watching movies. As a kid I remember listening to my parents try and find gospel principles presented in some of Hollywood's blockbusters.

Lame!

Well, at least I thought so until suddenly I found myself doing it too. Remember when Luke used the force to get his lightsaber to come to him while he was hanging upside down in the cave? I remember asking my Dad if that could ever happen and of course he then spent the next -what felt like hours - describing water being turned to wine, mountains being moved, waters being parted and the dead being raised through the power of the priesthood.

Whoa. It's real. The force is real.

Maybe finding gospel principles in the movies isn't so lame after all. If you love movies (and the Gospel) as much as I do then continue reading on as I give you 5 great connections between different movies and the gospel....

5. Name this movie quote : "With great power comes great responsibility..."

Did you get it?

Spiderman. (Not one of my favorite movies, but a solid gospel connection nonetheless)

We're taught that because we have the Gospel, we are held to a higher standard. We are more accountable. We may not like it, but it's the truth. Embrace the responsibility.

4. I'm a HUGE fan of the way Christopher Nolan has revived the Batman series. And each of the new movies have had little gems perfect for gospel comparisons.

Remember when Bruce Wayne was chastised by his friend Rachel? "It's not who you are underneath, but what you do that defines you..." Ooohh, zing! It's easy to talk about doing good, but how many of us back it up. Heavenly Father would rather have 1 doer of the word than a million eloquent speakers talking about doing good.

3. Lord of the Rings trilogy. Yeah, the entire trilogy. Look, we watched roughly 8 hours of good vs. evil (more like 12 if you watch the bonus footage). The beauty of the movies is that they show that no matter how much it looks like evil might win.... good will always prevail. The story of the Gospel of Jesus Christ is that no matter how much it might seem like evil is winning - good will always win. ALWAYS.

2. Just in case you thought I only watch action movies, I've thrown Sabrina on here. Sabrina, my favorite RomCom of all time. Thanks in large part to the fact that my mom watched this movie a lot when I was a kid and we listened to the soundtrack on almost every family drive we took. I highly recommend it. So, the main family is ridiculously rich and has practically anything you could ever want, except for something you can't really ever buy, love. At the end of the movie as Harrison Ford's character is chasing his love he says, "I need her.... and I don't need anything." The type of love we're all looking for is the kind that can't be bought. But it's the only kind that can last eternally....

1. And now to my absolute favorite, Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade. Harrison Ford in his glory days (before the weird hoop earring he now wears) and Sean Connery as his father in the best Indiana Jones of the trilogy (yeah I know there was a fourth, but it was so bad I don't acknowledge it). The scene where Indiana has to step out and make the "leap of faith" in order to reach the holy grail still gives me goosebumps. We talk about faith in Sunday School and sometimes describe how it is similar to stepping into the darkness and having the path lit as we move forward. The scene in the movie literally depicts Indiana stepping into the unknown hoping that the path would be there.

I know it might sound kind of lame - but I promise once you try looking for some way to see the gospel in your favorite movies, you'll actually enjoy them even more.

I know there are tons of examples that I've left off the list - what are some of your favorite Gospel/Hollywood connections?

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Kyle Aldous is the Marketing Director at Blickenstaff's Vintage Toy & Candy store located in Provo, Utah. He loves to bboy and read in his spare time.

Photo Credit: Barnaby Wasson

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Sunday Devotional - I'm In It

noreply@blogger.com (Mormon Mommy Blogs) — Sun, 05 Feb 2012 10:00:00 +0000

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Stuff We Loved This Week

noreply@blogger.com (Mormon Mommy Blogs) — Sat, 04 Feb 2012 18:59:00 +0000

Did you think we had forgotten all about this little feature? Nope. We've just been... how do we say it? Lazy?

Anyway. We've found some pretty cool stuff and wanted to share it with you.

Here's one of our most favorite things that we found this past week. Ferris Bueller purposed for the Super Bowl.

Pink Sparkly Puffy Heart Love It!

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Here are the rest of our super swanky finds from this past week.

1.Words to Live By
2. Super Cute Marble Fence
3. Star Wars Humor
4. Wall Clock
5. In A Pikle - Best. Gift. EVER. (watch for a review of this amazeballs product later)
6. Knowledge
7. Best Lamp Ever

See you next week!

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Church Was Canceled

noreply@blogger.com (Mormon Mommy Blogs) — Fri, 03 Feb 2012 16:00:00 +0000

In December the county I live in was hit with the worst storm we have seen in over 20 years. We had winds for 2 days straight that were over 100mph. The golf course in town lost over 350 trees-- and they were our old, beautiful trees that dated back to when the golf course we built in the 1950's. The destruction that my town suffered was massive!

The storm moved on to bigger and greater things and in it's wake left uprooted trees, smashed cars, homes without roofs, vehicles overturned on the interstate and fences completely wiped out. The porta-potty from the gun range ended up across town in someones yard and there was a trampoline stuck in a tree!

However, what was amazing is what happened after the storm. Church was canceled all over the community and people came out in droves to help each other clean up from the mess.

I drove around town and as I approached the golf course I saw hundreds of people that had come out that cold Sunday Morning to clean up the mess at the golf course-- and really all around town -- before the next storm came through. I felt a lump in my chest start to rise as I realized these people had come out to serve just because it was the right thing to do

They could have stayed in their nice warm houses and hoped that someone else took care of the mess, but they didn't. Church was canceled and everyone buckled down and got to work-- even working across town and in areas that were a mess but "someone else's problem" (read: the state). As I slowly drove around town watching everyone working so hard the tears freely fell. Their were old and young working side by side cleaning up the mess simply because it was the right thing to do. And, there was my father, who is in his mid sixties, leading the pack of volunteer cleanup.

It was an incredibly moving experience for me to witness because I knew that his body would be loudly protest his time of service. And yet, he gladly, and even eagerly offered not only his time, but his body because it was right. And, it made him feel good.

I have reflected on this experience as I have been attending RootsTech as a guest of Family Search. As I have listened to all of the amazing things they are involved in, I have felt my heart turning. And, you know what? It feels really good.

The Service that they are asking of us to give will give us the same rewarding feelings as physical service, and the best part is that we can offer this service from the comfort of our warm homes and with our entire families.

A family that serves together stays together. I heard that somewhere and it's true. Whether that service be cleaning up a town from a horrific storm or indexing names for family night, its service and it does something to you. Something really, really good.

I will be honest, I am not a Genealogist. Chasing dates is not something that interests me, but the stories do. I love the stories and I want to know them so I can give them to my children. As a child my favorite stories that my Parents would tell me were from "the olden days." My goodness. I just couldn't -- and still can't -- get enough of those stories from my parents.

Family Search is trying to make Family History easier for all of us "regular joes" who don't like" the chase." The types of technology they are using to help us accomplish mission critical is mind blowing to me. They know that we feel the guilty because we're not doing it. Our Family History.

It's hard. It's for old people, right? Where do you start? How do you do it? Family Search hears that. They know it and they are trying to help us help ourselves to stop feeling the guilt. The biggest message I got from this weekend is to STOP FEELING GUILTY. There is no reason to let the dreaded "boogity-boogity" take over anymore.

I can't wait to share with you all the amazing ways you can easily be involved with Family History. Like indexing from your smart phone. Yup. You totally can.

Hello High Council Sunday.

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Disclosure: Family Search paid for Elisa to attend RootsTech, however the opinions expressed here are hers and hers alone.

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February 2012 Visiting Teaching Printable: Guardians of the Hearth

noreply@blogger.com (Caroline) — Thu, 02 Feb 2012 13:45:00 +0000

The February 2012 Visiting Teaching message is called Guardians of the Hearth, and focuses on how ALL women, regardless of their marital or familial standing, have a responsibility to nurture and strengthen the family. We are all members of God's kingdom, and we are all members of His family.

Click here to read the entire February 2012 Visiting Teaching message.

Click here to download this month's message.

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The digital scrapbook kit used in this download is called I Wuv You Beary Much from Just So Scrappy.

All MMB Printables are made especially for our readers, and are free for personal, non commercial, private printed use only. Thanks!

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The Hearts of the Children

noreply@blogger.com (Elisa) — Wed, 01 Feb 2012 23:10:00 +0000

Last Sunday I attended our Stake Standards Night. This is an annual meeting for all youth ages 12-18, and their parents. My husband and I suggested, encouraged and then finally dragged all three of our boys to the meeting. Our stake has issued a challenge to the youth that each of them take 5 family names to the temple this year. We have approximately 500 youth in our stake so that would be 2500 names ready for temple work. They also challenged our youth to collectively index 1,000,000 names during 2012. It seems like a huge task, but when broken down it would only take each young man or young woman 6 minutes per day to do their part.

Last November in General Conference, Elder David A. Bednar spoke directly to the young men and women of the church about their role in the work of Family History. He said:

“My beloved young brothers and sisters, family history is not simply an interesting program or activity sponsored by the Church; rather, it is a vital part of the work of salvation and exaltation. You have been prepared for this day and to build up the kingdom of God. You are here upon the earth now to assist in this glorious work.”

I’m excited to teach my boys about their family history and help them learn how to index names in Family Search. I don’t feel like I will be starting from scratch since many relatives on both sides of our family have a love for genealogy and have spent countless hours gathering information and compiling it into books. One night, I came to my 16 year olds bedroom to tell him goodnight. Upon opening the door, I saw him sprawled across his bed, his face buried in a book. Reading is not a contact sport and therefore, not something he readily enjoys. My curiosity got the best of me and I walked in to take a look at what had him so captivated. Imagine my surprise when he held up “The Simpson Family of County Durham” a hefty 682 page collection of family history stories compiled by a dutiful historian on my husband’s side of the family. He proceeded to share with me some of the stories he had read and the names of family members dating back hundreds of years. After the shock wore off, I began to realize that he really had an interest in Family History. I feel like it’s my duty as his mother to share the spirit of Elijah with him and teach him about his heritage. I’m so grateful for the months and years of research that has already been done for our family, but I know there is much to do.

I look forward to attending Roots Tech this week so I can learn more about Family History and the technology available, and know better how to encourage my boys to help further the work.

I love what Elder Bednar said at the end of his talk:

“It is no coincidence that FamilySearch and other tools have come forth at a time when young people are so familiar with a wide range of information and communication technologies. Your fingers have been trained to text and tweet to accelerate and advance the work of the Lord—not just to communicate quickly with your friends.”

Judging by the number of texts that come and go from each of their phones on a monthly basis, I’m confident that my boys are more than ready to begin.

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Veronica is the lucky mom of 5 great kids who keep her busy with their games, practices, and other activities. She and her husband Kevin recently celebrated 19 years of marital ~~chaos~~ bliss and are looking forward to at least fifty more.

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Word to Your Mother

noreply@blogger.com (Mormon Mommy Blogs) — Tue, 31 Jan 2012 20:59:00 +0000

Fact: the more kids you have the worse your memory is. They kill brain cells, yo.

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My Daughter Is A Mess, What Do I Do? {what got me through}

noreply@blogger.com (Mormon Mommy Blogs) — Tue, 31 Jan 2012 01:00:00 +0000

I have five children. Five wonderful, awful, beautiful children. They range from the age of twenty-three to seven. Four of these kids are boys and I have one little -- who is now not so little-- daughter, and we’ll call her Kelly.

This little girl of mine has been her own person since day one. At the age of one, when I was working full time, my babysitter came to me and said she couldn’t watch Kelly anymore. This babysitter had watched my son, but Kelly was not him. She was her own person and she could not just be "fed, bundled up and put to bed.” She was who she was and she needed attention. I was able to find her another sitter-- A neighbor who loved her like she was her own. This woman had lost a little girl and was so happy to have the chance to take care of another little girl. She loved my daughter like she was her own, and my daughter knew it.

We moved several more times over the years with one being right at the time she was to start High School. This was a difficult transition for her and she really struggled. It has always been hard for Kelly to make friends. She is a bit standoffish and is afraid of opening up to others because that makes her feel vulnerable.

As her mom, I get it. I’m much the same way.

She found a good friend in our ward and we were excited because we thought this meant that her high school experience was going to be a great one. However, this was not the case. This young woman, who was her friend at church, was not her friend at school and would ignore her. This left my daughter feeling very hurt, vulnerable and left her open to that group of kids who will take in anyone. You know the ones who accept all people, because they are not accepted? Those were the kids who befriended my daughter.

Her grades started to go down because she and her new group of “friends” were skipping too much school.

We got a boundary variance and moved her to a different High School hoping that this would help her solve some issues. She knew kids at this new High School and her Dad and I were hopeful that she would make new friends that would help her to be stronger and make better choices. However, things just kept getting worse for her. Her friends were not a good influence on her, her grades were awful and she was failing eight classes.

My Daughter Is A Mess, What do we do? We had hoped that she would get new friends at church, but this didn’t happen either.

How do I explain this, without sounding prejudice myself? My husband is from Central America and I am white. I have beautiful brown babies. I don’t see color, but I am amazed at how many people in this state do see color.

I’m sure that people will argue with me that it’s not true, but remember, I’m living it. I see it. I’m watching it happen with my very own eyes. It happens at school, it happens on the street, and yes, it even happens at church.

Things happened in our lives that were beyond our control and this led to yet another move. But, this time it was a move closer to my childhood home. A move closer to my mom. A move that would put my beautiful brown daughter in a different High School--the school I went to as a child.

This was her third high school and as she started this new school, she seemed happy. There were definitely issues, but they seemed to be smaller than our past issues. The biggest problem were those dumb friends from her old high school were too darn close. They did not go away. They brought drama with a capital “D”. We were able to find a good counselor at the high school that made sure that Kelly graduated -- by the skin of her chinny-chin-chin she graduated.

Through all of this my oldest son went on a mission. We were good church going, praying, scripture reading LDS people. We were not perfect, but we tried our hardest to do our best.

Kelly however started drinking. She started smoking marijuana. She started doing the things that she knew she shouldn’t and because of this she was angry. She hit walls and she would fight with us constantly. She was -- is -- a mess.

What could I do? How could I help? If I talked religion, she would throw it in my face how awful her experience was in our old ward. I would try and explain the Gospel is true, even if the people aren’t. She didn’t -- doesn’t -- believe me. Right now my house was a war-zone. I have been through struggles in the past and I have weathered a few storms. However, I do not know how to weather this storm. The straw that broke the camels back was a tattoo she got in a drunken state, and a car hitting the divider on the highway.

I constantly turned to the scriptures but I could not find what I needed to help me feel peace. I prayed constantly, but did not feel like I was getting any answers. Finally, I pulled out my Patriarchal Blessing and that is when the peace came. I read the line “Your children will not stray so far that they will not remember your teachings and come back.” There it was. That was my hope.

My hope is that I have taught this young woman correct principles. She knows I love her, no matter what. I even tease her to this day, “Kelly, what do you think that means “so far”. How far IS that?”

I don’t know how my little girls life is going to turn out nor do I know where she will end up. But, I do know that I have done my best. I have tried to teach her correctly and she will return. It may not be in this life, but one day she will return. This is what is getting me through. My patriarchal blessing. My knowledge. My faith.

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About the Author: This author has chosen to remain anonymous. If you would like to contribute to this series, please email your submission to info@mormonmommyblogs.com with What Got Me Through in the subject line. Or send it via our contact form. We ask that your post to not have been published before. You can, however re purpose old posts by changing at a minimum the first 100 words. It also needs to be no more than 600 words.

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Lets Discuss - Sacrament Meeting

noreply@blogger.com (Mormon Mommy Blogs) — Wed, 25 Jan 2012 23:56:00 +0000

Sacrament Meeting.

We all go (or should) and if you have kids they may get bored. Unless you're super righteous, then they don't.

My kids seem think they need crayons, paper -- and if I would let them-- scissors and glue to "make it through" Sacrament Meeting. I let them break it out before the Sacrament Hymn and then once again after the Sacrament is over. Once they hear the opening chords of that hymn start, they have to put all their stuff away and sing at the top of their lungs.

It's the rules. At least my rules. What are your rules with regards to activities during sacrament meeting?

Then lets talk food. I don't bring any treats at all to church because it's not Snackrament Meeting its Sacrament Meeting. My friend however brings sandwiches and sippy cups filled with milk for her kids. Other families have bags of cheerios, crackers and I have even seen a candy bar or two.

What do you do?

Is it "Snackrament" meeting for you or no?

What about that bag-o-tricks? When does it come out-- if at all?

And, I'll be totally honest with you-- I may die a little inside if you tell me that your kids sit quietly with their arms folded singing kumbaya in their heads all through church because mine? Not so much.

Ready. Set. Discuss.

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YouTube Finds

noreply@blogger.com (Mormon Mommy Blogs) — Tue, 24 Jan 2012 21:28:00 +0000

We have a testimony of YouTube and we'd like you to know that WE know it's true. These videos make us feel all sorts of sparkly inside. Enjoy Peeps.

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A Case of the Mom Frump: Take Two

noreply@blogger.com (Caroline) — Wed, 18 Jan 2012 13:00:00 +0000

Be gone Frumpy Mom!

Well, some months ago, I wrote a piece about being a frumpy mom.

And people had ALL kinds of things to say about it. From, "You and me both!" to "Oh my gosh you basically pulled a bait and switch on your husband!"

Yes, people feel very very strongly about this whole subject.

So, all of the comments really got me thinking and considering.

Since then, I've been making an effort.

I know, shocking, right?

I am attempting, these days, to get dressed in the morning, not just throw on whatever. I am trying to learn more about what looks nice and what goes with what.

I am far from perfect. I still throw on yoga pants some days. But I throw on a skirt on a weekday quite often now too.

My clothes still get covered in goo, it's true. Today my white tunic (why did I buy white?) got smeared with graham cracker. But, I have found that is what stain spray is for.

And the result?

Well, I don't think my husband loves me any more than before.

I don't think anyone has noticed the change at all.

Except me of course.

I do like looking nice. I do like walking around with my four kids and thinking, "Yes, my children are crazy, but at least I look put together!"

I still fail at wearing my wedding ring. Sorry. It's just not my thing. Husband is looking into plain bands for me.

I still don't put on make-up everyday. I don't think I ever will. I am allergic to most, and they make my face hurt!

But my hair is as neat as I can make it. My clothes are clean (as I can manage) and as "outfit-like" as possible.

It's a good thing.

I must MUST place this disclaimer: I have purchased almost nothing to make this switch. The few pieces I have bought were from the thrift store, a blouse here and there and a couple of skirts and even a pair of second-hand skinny jeans (GASP!). I know my budget has no wiggle room, name brands from the mall are NOT an option. If you're interested in making a change, I strongly suggest you start with thrift stores. Because if you buy something that doesn't work for you, you're out four bucks instead of forty.

I guess the moral of the story is: Don't knock it til you've tried it.

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Morgan blogs about life. And you know, stuff. Check her out!

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Word to your Mother

noreply@blogger.com (Caroline) — Wed, 18 Jan 2012 00:59:00 +0000

Before I had children, I was a morning person. Now I am a night owl. This is because it's the only time that I can legitimately get away with doing nothing.
So I sit, by myself, in the dark, and enjoy the silence.... it's not weird. It's motherhood. ******** Get MMB’s newest posts in email or in your blog reader. Follow us on: Twitter, Become a Facebook Fan and keep-up via Networked Blogs!

Time to get Mad

noreply@blogger.com (Caroline) — Tue, 17 Jan 2012 13:00:00 +0000

"When things look bad, and it looks like you're not gonna make, then you gotta get mean. I mean plumb mad dog mean." ~Clint Eastwood

Recently, I faced a few setbacks at work. Things did not pan out the way I wanted them to, and I was incredibly frustrated.

When I was a kid, and something went wrong or turned out differently then I expected, I would hold onto the negative feelings; 2 weeks later, I would still be stewing over the incident. What I didn't realize was that moping never solved my problem. As I held onto certain issues, I kept myself from being able to move on to take advantage of new opportunities.

My wise mom taught me a great trick for dealing with setbacks. She said that when something goes wrong you need to determine a set period of time you're going to allow yourself to be mad, and once that time has passed, you need to drop the issue and begin looking forward.

So here's my current method for handling life's disappointments: The moment something doesn't go my way, I tell myself - "Ok Kyle, you've got 24 hours to be as angry, sad, frustrated, upset, emotional, negative as you want. But, once that 24 hours is over, you've got to let go and move on."

Then I've got 24 hours to let my emotions go CRAZY!

"Sad Kyle" usually mopes around the house, watches a sad movie, and eats a lot of candy. (more candy than I usually eat)

"Angry Kyle" puts Eminem, Limp Bizkit, and Jay-Z on, then goes into RAGE mode.

No matter what the situation has been, it has been incredibly helpful for me to follow this pattern for learning to let go of anger, disappointment, frustration. I t has allowed me to really let the emotion go crazy for a short period of time before I'm able to let go and then embrace new opportunities.

What do you guys like to do when things go wrong? How do you let go of the negativity?

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Kyle is Marketing Director at Blickenstaff's Vintage Toy & Candy store. He is also a competitive bboy!

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Just Like Her

noreply@blogger.com (Caroline) — Mon, 16 Jan 2012 13:00:00 +0000

I love this picture of my middle daughter. Out of our three kids, she is hands down the happiest. She lives in her own little world, set to her own sound track, and thinks life is not complete unless she's wearing a skirt.

She's also a joy to give gifts to. Each gift, from a box of cereal to a pony, is greeted with an enthusiastic gasp of air and squeal of delight. She can honest to goodness play with a string for an hour at a time happily.

I want to be like her when I grow up.

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Myrnie blogs about life over at I, Wonder Woman and talks about her latest gardening, home school, and homesteading projects at DIY Mama.

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Snow and Ice

noreply@blogger.com (Caroline) — Fri, 13 Jan 2012 13:00:00 +0000

For the past couple of weeks, we have had snow.

All the roads have been covered, the roofs covered in white, the driveways are slick and icy, and the trees wear a shimmering crown high up in the boughs. I love the way that snow changes the landscape, the way it glistens, and the way it changes my perspective.

I love and appreciate seeing all the different seasons throughout the year. (Something that I never had when we lived in the desert). But, along with all the beautiful white stuff, comes the cold, the ice, the fog, and even more of that bone chilling, windy cold air.

It has seemed to me like I just can not get warm enough this year. We have the fireplace, heaters, and blankets, but somehow, I am still cold.

One of the things that I have really had to learn with this winter season is that, if I can change my focus to something else, (and wear a sweater or a sweatshirt), I can forget about the cold and find the beauty in each day. I can forget about my longing for spring and color blooming everywhere, and instead appreciate the here and now.

I have learned that it is easy to get complacent in our own lives. We see the same things day in and day out. We have the same family living under our roof, the same child who listens and picks up, the same husband who fixes lunch (or maybe doesn't fix lunch), the same house to live in, clothes to wear, and food to eat. Sadly, the same old things cease to look like blessings in our eyes, and instead start being something we expect to have instead of a blessing to have.

Take the snow for example. When it is fresh and new, it looks magical. It makes everything around us look like a wonderland. I love to see the faces on my girls when we all go play in the snow together. It brings joy to my heart and to their eyes. What a blessing for us to spend time having fun together, instead of doing our normal, everyday, living together things. However, that same snowfall, also means that we have to make several trips to the woodpile each day, we have to shovel the driveway, and sometimes even walk to work because of the ice in the road. It can take away the magic that I found earlier in the morning if I do not keep my focus on the good instead of on the perceived bad that comes from snow. The snow has not changed, instead the way that I am looking at it has changed.

I have learned that blessings are a lot like snow. When they are new and fresh in our eyes, we see them and recognize the Lord's hand in them. We know He has answered our prayers to bring us to this point. But when the blessings become a common, everyday occurrence, we start to forget the magic. The blessing is still there, but we are focusing our attention on the perceived negative, instead of being grateful for that which we really do have.

I have discovered that changing my heart to one of gratitude, profoundly affects the world around me.

When I approach my life as something to be truly thankful for, I find more and more things that really are blessings in my life. I have found God's hand in the world around me in so many more ways than I ever thought possible.

So today, my challenge to you is to simply look around you. List the things in your heart and mind that you are grateful for. Write them in your journal, or even on a notebook page and hang them where you can see them often. When you start to doubt that you are blessed, go back and look at your list. In my life, I have found that some of my greatest trials are responsible for bringing me some of my richest blessings.

"Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos into order, confusion into clarity.... It turns problems into gifts, failures into success, the unexpected into perfect timing, and mistakes into important events. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today and creates a vision for tomorrow." ~Melodie Beattie

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Patty Ann is a busy mother, grandmother, and wife. She lives her life in the woods she loves up on the top of a beautiful mountain. She loves music, photography and writing. Most of all she loves her Heavenly Father and enjoys writing about his influence in her life. You can find her on her blog at Pitterle Postings

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I Am a Child of God Printable

noreply@blogger.com (Caroline) — Thu, 12 Jan 2012 13:00:00 +0000

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You would like more LDS printables, yes?
We thought so.
To kick things off, we have this fantastic "I am a child of God" print in six different colors. It's an 8x10 print, so you can either print it off on your computer, or you can send it to your local photo printer.
It would look GREAT framed in your hall, your entry, or your child's bedroom. Promise.
Click to download the I am a Child of God Printable from Mormon Mommy Blogs

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Walking on Stormy Seas: On Serving in the Church

noreply@blogger.com (Caroline) — Wed, 11 Jan 2012 20:05:00 +0000

Can I be really honest? I'm going to write from my heart here, in the hopes that it might help someone else. I'm not digging for compliments or looking for someone from my stake to say, "Oh, but you do such a good job."

Here's my secret: I really struggle in my calling. It's very difficult for me on a multitude of levels.

Two years ago, I was called to the stake presidency. This meant my release as a bishop--a calling that had been a challenge, but that was deeply rewarding on a variety of levels.

At first, the calling was accompanied by a spiritual high. Being interviewed, called, and taught by a General Authority was invigorating and nourishing to my soul--beyond my ability to express.

But before long, the high faded and reality set in. I love the men I serve with. They are some of the best men I've ever known. But I am younger than they are, and much different in many ways. I frequently felt like the odd man out--not because of anything they did, just because of who I am.

I found myself in new situations that stretched me and worked spiritual and emotional muscles that had grown weak. I won't bore you with details, but the calling became very, very difficult for me. Periods of bleak depression set in, punctuated with positive things as well.

Why am I saying this? Well, because I think it's important for us to understand that callings are meant to be difficult in that they are given to us to help us grow, to refine us--and that is inherently going to be difficult.

I also think that many people assume that someone who is serving as a bishop or in a stake presidency somehow has it made--that they don't struggle with doubts and weakness and so on. I have come to believe that this view is as pervasive as it is false.

I once extended a calling of great responsibility to a man. He accepted, but confided in me some of his doubts and fears. He seemed surprised when I empathized with these fears and explained some of my own struggles, and those of others I knew.

But more than that, I tell this story because I want to share the resolution, hoping it might help someone else.

As I went through my period of darkness and depression, I cast about, searching urgently for something--for peace or guidance--something to help me. I knew I had years ahead in this calling and was desperate for a scrap of light to help me.

I finally found that scrap as I read in Matthew. One night, as the disciples were tossed about in a boat, Jesus walked out on the water to meet them.

Filled with what I assume was exuberance and energy, Peter asked the Savior to bid him come out on the water. The Savior agreed, and Peter jumped out of the boat and walked on the water.

And then Peter saw the waves and felt the wind--he noticed all that was going on, all the reasons he couldn't walk on the water and he began to sink and called out for help. The scriptures record that Jesus immediately stretched forth his hand and caught him.

The next verse says this: "When they were come into the ship, the wind ceased." (Matthew 14:31). To me, that implies that Peter and Jesus--together--walked back at least a few steps to the ship.

Peter's experience, it seems to me, provides a pattern. Jumping out of the boat and running across the waves to the Savior must have been exhilarating--a physical and spiritual high. But then, realty set in and Peter was surrounded by a storm. As he sunk, he cried out for help--which came. And then, together, the Lord and Peter finished the task.

The darkness of my depression felt like going under the waves, causing me to call out. And, as with Peter, I found the Savior's warm rescue. Now, I'm trying to walk with Him as I do my best in my calling. I am convinced that most of us feel, from time to time, that we are walking (or sinking) in stormy seas. The trick is to reach out for that hand that will always be there.

Photo credit: Stained Glass Window--First Baptist Church (Hamburg, Arkansas)

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Braden Bell is a husband, father, teacher, director and author. He blogs about all of these things at bradenbell.com.

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Word to your Mother

noreply@blogger.com (Caroline) — Tue, 10 Jan 2012 19:00:00 +0000

Emotional Vampires suck. Don't let them eat your heart out.

Sunday Devotional - The Spirit

noreply@blogger.com (Elisa) — Sun, 08 Jan 2012 19:02:00 +0000

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What Got Me Through

noreply@blogger.com (Elisa) — Thu, 05 Jan 2012 18:00:00 +0000

Whenever I have a problem I Google it.

I do. I totally Google my problems with the hopes that I'll find that magic solution in 2.1 seconds with the answers listed in order of importance --from best to worst -- with ten pages to choose from.

Of course I pray about it, too, and ask my friends and family members for advice. But eventually I turn to Google and ask it what I should do. I am always hopeful that this time the solution to my problem is as easy to find as typing "what do I do" into Google.

It's not.

But I keep doing it, hoping that I'll find those magic solutions.

Don't we all wish our problems could be solved just by asking Google? We're looking for the solutions, we're asking the questions and sometimes it's really hard to hear the answers from Him. So, we turn to "the world".

Only "the world" typically doesn't have the heaping dose of hope that we are searching for.

When I am in the middle of my muck, I try to attend everything I can to see if the Lord will reach out to me and give me my answers. Womens Conference? Yes. Time Out For Women? Yup. Stake Relief Society Conferences? You Bet. Enrichment Meetings (or whatever it is they're calling it these days)? Sure.

The problem is that rarely have I found that version of hope, comfort or even an answer that I am so desperately searching for. Why? Because sometimes in order to get that nugget of hope that will keep me pushing forward requires other people to be vulnerable and to share. And that, my friends, is a scary thing for most of us to do--open up and be vulnerable. Sharing our struggles and trials does just that-- it makes us vulnerable and easy targets for trolls.

So what do we do? We keep quiet and share nothing... and keep Googling trying to find what it is we are searching for--hoping eventually we will find it.

When you're struggling it's lonely and hard . It's so much work to try and figure out how to solve your problems. Especially when those problems include other people.

This idea made us both Caroline and I start to think: How many other people out there are searching for answers or some hope-- via Google? How many people are Googling their trials? Their problems? Their stresses with the hopes of finding something that will get them through? Some sort of answer that worked for someone else?

That's really why we Google. We want help. We want answers. Solutions. Hope.

My son doesn't want to go on a mission...
I'm super sick, what's wrong with me...
My daughter has spinal-bifada...
My husband likes porn...
My baby died and I'm falling apart...
My mom has been given 6 months to live...
I have cancer...
My child has a severe mental illness...
My marriage is falling apart...
My kid is on drugs...
My husband had an affair..

How do I cope?
WHAT DO I DO?

Maybe deep down we know we aren't really going to find that magic 8-ball answer when we Google it. But it sure would be nice if we could at least find someone else who has traveled the road we are traveling. It would be nice to read how they muddled through the muck and what Gospel principal, quote, or scripture they held onto that got them through. Or in the very least helped them hold on for just one more day.

That's where YOU and MMB come together.

Everyone has trials, problems and stress in their life. And, we want to help you, via Google, find some hope when you need it most. Hence our new feature here on MMB called "What Got Me Through"

We will feature various bloggers who currently have or had a problem, trial or stress and the gospel principal, quote or scripture that helped them cope, and gave them hope... Got them through. And, we're going to show you how you're not alone and hopefully give you a little something to hang onto that can help get you through.

We're really excited about our new series and have several posts ready for posting. If you are interested in sharing what helped get you through a specific trial-- but don't want everyone to know-- you can do so anonymously. Send us your post and let us know if you want it anonymous or if you want it linked (and where) and we will take care of the rest.

Make sure to title it what you would Google if you were looking for some sort of answer and we will take care of the rest so that Google will find your words of encouragement that someone else is so desperately searching for.

Let's populate the Internet with hope, people. Let's use it for good.

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Story? Slam!

noreply@blogger.com (Mormon Mommy Blogs) — Thu, 05 Jan 2012 12:00:00 +0000

This is Cassie Ashton.

She's a professional story teller, and will be facilitating the Story Slam at the Story at Home conference.

And guess what? My family had the whole 'story slam' idea completely wrong!

I have three sisters, and we really get a kick out of each other. Seriously. Sometimes we hear bone crack.

But most of the time we get along great.

Now, the way my family is structured -- and I grew up thinking everyone's family worked this way -- is Girl - Boy - Girl - Boy (deceased) - Girl - Boy - Girl, all two calendar years apart.

My mom has been napping for the last 20 years. Very well-deserved.

So, if you took the time to do the math, you'll see that each of us girls is four years apart in age. I'm the oldest, which also makes me the Boss. Stands to reason.

Amber is the youngest, which in our family makes her the Keeper of the Family Lore. She knows everyone's birthdays -- including in-laws and grandkids -- and she has memorized every single story every told by anyone at any time in our family.

Here's the problem: My family are all a bunch of filthy liars. You should hear the nonsense they spin about me when we were kids and I was merely teaching them how to work independently by foisting my chores onto the nearest sucker while I watched "All My Children."

What? You should see Jill's house. Spic and span, day or night. Think that just happened? Ha! Don't make me laugh.

The really great stories are about Kim, who shares a birthday with Jill but with four years difference. Kim is the 'sweet' one. Beware, all ye who are introduced to 'sweet' women. They conceal wicked, brilliant, calculating hearts. The kind of hearts that, when their older sister (by four years, to the day) is frantically searching for her new bikini in preparation for a weekend getaway with friends, and is nearly beside herself because the friends will be here any second now, and somehow if they have to wait a few extra minutes Lake Havasu will dry up into dust and they'll have to spend the weekend running through the sprinklers in the back yard -- the SWEET sister will very SWEETLY help her look for the lost swim suit.

That sweet, sweet girl will go through closets, empty drawers, and sort through unfolded laundry, all the while cooing sympathetically at her hysterical sister. Eventually, Big Sister will settle for last year's model and trek off to Lake Havasu, ashamed to be seen in a bathing suit that is 11 whole months old but happy to be on her way.

And then -- THEN -- the next day, when their mom is changing sheets on all the beds, she'll find the missing bikini, hidden beneath the mattress belonging to the SWEET sister!

This is where the Keeper of the Family Lore comes in. Big Sister has no sooner arrived home when Littlest Sister shares the tragic saga of loss, shame, and betrayal that solves the Mystery of the Disappearing Bikini.

Up the stairs marches the Big Sister. Into the Sweet Sister's room she storms. Heated words are exchanged. Sweet Sister is unrepentant. Big Sister is incensed. More heated words. More lack of repentance. More rage.

Until finally, the sunburned Big Sister flies out of the Sweet Sister's bedroom, and -- SLAM! goes the bedroom door with such force that the house is moved three feet off its foundation.

Growing up, that was what we might have called a "Story / Slam."

But in real life, a Story Slam is something totally different! I know! Doesn't that beat all?

In a real Story Slam, professional story tellers have a set amount of time in which to tell a story, often on a given subject and frequently off-the-cuff. It's fast and exciting and not for the faint of heart, much like Black Friday at Walmart. Only you're less likely to lose an arm at a Story Slam, which to my way of thinking is a good thing.

Pictured above is Cassie Ashton, who is one of the facilitators at the Story at Home conference in March, 2012. I'm really looking forward to watching the performances by some of the best storytellers in the business.

In fact, if they call for any tales about bathing suits and sisterly love, I might just march myself up onto that stage and share my story.

Slam and all.

Contributed to MMB by DeNae Handy, who also has two brothers. They have their own stories to tell, including the one about the Mexican police officer and the sleight of hand that kept them out of a Tijuana jail.

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