my band room

music stor

2011-08-30T22:50:00.000-07:00

today i went shopping, not in the boaring malls but out on the street, walked 2blocks for 2/1/2 hours. there's many fancy cute stylish things. home decor, clothing brands you can't find in malls and a lot of accesories. the day was okay didn't eat for 7hours cuz my mother promised to eat with us, but then she came late to pick us up and she was really pissed off so we ended up not eatting plus i got soar legs so i sate in the car when my mom and sis went to look at a stor that had closing sale. so i slept a bit in the car looking at ppl walking by. i saw a mother and child walk by going to a community center and as time passed i see them walking out so i figuered the girl finished her class, when i checked the time, they took 45min in that shop already, i waited some more, finaly got so pissed cuz i was hungry. well we ended up buying dinner.

so yea i walked into a music stor today, first time in my life, it's not like HMV, it has vinal,(lots of that) old old old arcade machines, and cd's(no duh) well it was an intereasting stor, it was big, you would feel so forne in there, well i did cuz i thought i listen to many kinds of songs and singers, but u look at all the cd's and stuffs they have you wont know even 80% of the things there. well i thought i would find chrsitina agulairas back to basic, but no, they had none of her cd's and as i looked more the only new pop singers they have are lady gaga and a lot of adel, and some new country female singers... sigh*

wonderful food

2011-08-24T17:12:00.000-07:00

this was my breakfast i made. tomato grilled cheese sandwich, it was soo yummy, so that's why i posted this up.

now my lunch, made this myself all so. fried rice, i put 1egg, some meat, chopped ginger and some sauce. the great thing is you add no salt, and every time i cook, i try to add no salt of little salt, cuz the other ingredients or sauces have salt already, so if you mixed it well, the dish should be salty enough. :D by the way this dish is sweet and sour, really Asian.

turn it up

2011-08-19T18:22:00.000-07:00

dis is my new ifrogz toxix pink headphones!!!!!!
i love them so much, they also act as speakers and so far i've been liking it, so comfy and the sound quality is awesome. now i know how clumsy i can get, so i hope i don't break them soon, in till i get a job then it wont mind as much.

by the way next year i might be having a job yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, finally my mother lets me, and i really need the money so i can save up and spend with out being worried. well for now the opportunities i have are, my fav art store Micheal's and my fav i just love this place, marble slab, they've got some of the best ice cream for a reasonable price. so i hope by the time i apply eeither place has a spot for me. hope all this does not interfere with school ):

you hurt me so much when all i ever did was love you

2011-08-18T16:31:00.001-07:00

"I could feel it from the start,
Couldn't stand to be apart."
what about now, aren't you apart.

"Don't know what you did boy but
You had it and I've been hooked ever since."
your all over it, the heat has grown cold.
"Everytime I see you everything starts making sense."

did it make sense for you to break up with him?

"You got what I want boy, and I want it!
So keep on givin' it up!"

not now has he given anything to you, but u gave him a son.

"And I've been hurt so many times before,
That my hope was dying, so sick of trying"

you've been hurt too many times, let's add this one to the list, you might be out of luck in love, but with music it can always give you hope.

"And there's no way to lie to you, you know me better than I do"

girl think again, i think not

"Time went on, and I was wrong
To keep my distance for so long.
So afraid, you wouldn't stay
But you never turned away"

what about now, you broke up with him not too soon when you just had a baby. there was a reason for you putting your distance away, and i would know why, but with me i wouldn't make my wall easy to climb, i wouldn't let my door be wide open.

"So don't you ever go away
I could never face
Losing you would kill my faith"

you got through without him, cuz you had music.

"I couldn't breathe without you here
What kind of world
Would I see without you
I can't dream without you here"

wishes do come true, and wish has been granted, how does it feel now, can you breath, live and see?

"Promise me we'll always stay
The way we are today"

a promise is a promise and one of you broke it. this is why i always say a paper with 2 names written on it means nothing, you can bend the rules to this one easily.

"Cuz some guys have shown me aces
But you've got that royal flush
I know it's crazy everyday"

it's not that craxy after all, you got ride of the person that use to have the roaly flush, but now he's a trash.
"But you've broken all my walls"

yes he has, how long will it be intill you build your walls back up. i'm pretty sure i have many walls undercover, so ppl bring it on.

fridge story

2011-08-16T09:49:00.000-07:00

As I walk out of the kitchen. Holding onto a vanilla drum stick I sit down right next to my mom watching TV.

Mom: can I have one.

Me: get it yourself.

Mom: fine whatever, I’ll be healthy and not eat one.

Me: good girl

Me: lick lick*

Mom: hey!..can I have one bite?

Me: no way

Mom: plz

Me: if u take one bite then I’ll eat 2 drumsticks

Mom: go ahead

Me: neh

Mom: I just wanted to try what the vanilla taste likes.

Me: oh this one is chocolate (lying)

Mom: no I ate the chocolate yesterday

Me: well this is the chocolate one

Me: lick lick*

Me: oh god it’s cold…

my joke of the day

2011-08-16T09:47:00.001-07:00

An Amish boy and his father were visiting a nearby mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny silver walls that moved apart and back together again by themselves.
The lad asked, "What is this, father?"

The father, having never seen an elevator, responded, "I have no idea what it is."

While the boy and his father were watching wide-eyed, an old lady in a wheelchair rolled up to the moving walls and pressed a button. The walls opened and the lady rolled between them into a small room. The walls closed and the boy and his father watched as small circles lit up above the walls.

The walls opened up again and a beautiful twenty-four-year-old woman stepped out.

The father looked at his son anxiously and said, "Go get your mother."

(well if u didn't get the last part, the father thinks she's in heaven)

fridg

2011-08-10T14:02:00.000-07:00

today i had a chocolate chess cake, and by the way i am eating while i'm making this post. sometimes i just really like the feeling of opening the fridge and just easily pick out a comfort food, or sweets, and it does cheer you up and make you feel better. (i have food addiction) that's what its like when i feel sad and alone(like right now) just want to garb some food and eat it, like ice cream cake cereal and my hand cooked pop corn. i really actually make my pop corn the old style way, so that a) don't need to use the microwave, by the way i haven't really used one, b) no wasting money on a pop corn maker, waste space and money. my pop corn is way better then what my mom makes and sometimes the theater, cuz i take time to make it so that every seed is popped well, and when you chuck a handful into your mouth you don't eat any hard stuffs left over from not having the seeds popped well. i can call my self a pop corn mater at my house. my mom's still the cook master and bake master. even the chiefs that cook in grand hotels love my mothers pork chop and mango pudding. you go to a pot luck leave the pudding on the table, less then 5min it's all gone and 10min later they ask for the recipe, then months after, they say : i can't make it look and taste as the same as yours!!

but then i have this question, if u are suffering from depression or bipolar, do u feel more likely to eat, or not eat as much, or can it be both at the same time? cuz i think i have a mix of both which i find funny....

refection's

2011-08-09T22:48:00.000-07:00

looking at the stars remind me of past childhood memories. but remembering that these memories were engraved to my heart, holding them dearly all along not being able to feel the sadness, it's been too long, the memories stay but the feelings is gone.
by: me

no matter if i was happy,sad crying, board, or felt a pain in me, i starred at the stars, and looking back now, i had that flash back, but this time i didn't feel the pain or sadness i use to have, as years pass they pass by too and soon it's numb, nothing do i ever feel again.

hey i just found out that A) i am suffering from bipolar or B) bipolar II i think it's properly bipolar II.
2 weeks i have been feeling sooo dizzy, almost about to faint, but luckily i don't, i hope by the time i go to school i don't feel the same cuz i'd be died, i need all that energy to go to class.... and i hope the stupid chest pains don't kick in too, that be even worse ):

but like i say rather i die for good, or i live and not make such a big problem to anyone, it's getting to be repeating, all i ever think about are the same things i can't get over with 7 years ago and still each and every year i think about it lots, it has invade like 50% of my brain, poor brain, and all it about is me being soo stupid and useless, and 7years i still have not found out my existence in life, if i still haven't found the answer to that in 2 years, i'd shoot myself or something. no one get's what kinds that really exist in my life, to put it into easier words, i'm not a normal human, and i don;t have a normal well efficient brain... it doesn't work normally and it doesn't do the simple things its suppose to be capable with ... but really who cares, no one cares and i wont either, its like a state of dead end. if my mother can call me "insane and crazy" then yes u might have a guess in what it's like. and besides my brain other parts of my body(myself) don't work as normal as well ); but i am lucky that i can walk, so i always wanted to cut my leg off or something to give it to someone that's in need of one.

blue blood

2011-08-08T14:32:00.000-07:00

may be after all i'm not cold blooded, i thought i was, there was a point in life when nothing mattered, and my feelings in me swept away, cuz it felt like everything was gone and hope was lost. but after all i had feelings cuz i miss you. i might just just be messing around with my brain, it so confusing. sometimes there are 2 thing that go on my mind and they can be soo weird afterwards, i try not to think about it, but then when i do the other one pops up. why are my feelings so easy like folding a paper airplane...

------------------------------------------------------

i really hope that my friend didn't burst out anything i said to him, or he said to me,it suppose to be top secret and not that i don't trust him, but he said he will "try to not say" but i want him to be zipped mouth shut for real, so if he did then guess what, i'll have to cut myself and of course to prove that i did cut myself evidence is needed, well i guess in this situation pain and violence does solve problems. can any one tell me how hard do u need to cut, cuz it seems like it never works when i do it....... -___-;;;

to my beloved's

2011-08-06T14:54:00.000-07:00

just when i saw the pv once again and herd the song once more, i thought of something i wanted to tell you guyz, but i know there is no way i can do such a thing. you and me are soo far away from each other, two other worlds. but i wanted to say was, " you can change how u think of visual kei, interpret the fashion and trend to what u think it means and is, people like you can shine brighter once more and make an awesome change, you all look the same. new bands old bands all copy each other, there is almost no disctingion between you all." i love you but when i look at you then i look at them i get a feeling of upset.

music to death

2011-07-31T17:41:00.000-07:00

i just found out one of the things that can bring a deeper isolation is music. not just listen to music in general, but the type and stuffs, hard metal rock and all that kinda stuffs bring to isolation and selfishness, cuz your so competent with yourself. and guess what i love love love my music on full blast, not sure why just do, that when i feel invisible, i can walk by a hall way and feel no one and no one can see me. and just when i thought i liked rock becuz of other influences, it was just myself all along. it's such a habit listening to songs all the time, do it everywhere anytime, just when i have the time i bring it out. know only if i can share it with my friends, but no... they don't like the songs i like, and funny i listen to a wide variates of songs, in language and genera. how can someone not find one song they like from my song list... ): oh well I'll get to practise some selfishness and listen to it myself. i might just have a feeling soon enough i will be soo self fish and alone. but that doesn't matter, i mean I've been a bad bad girl, well I've always been. very rebellious.

usless

2011-07-27T17:15:00.000-07:00

i was going to type out, what i wanted to say for the day, but somehow i didn't felt like it after logging on...weird
well life to me is so freakin annoying, i just want to get it over with live it and die. end of story...

by the way if anyone plays gaia this would be my dream avi, but i am far, away from this one, don't have enough gold..... sigh

24hours

2011-07-19T15:07:00.000-07:00

photo taken by: me

god being the only one eyes wide and mind oped 24hours.

the only one that choose to listen to you carefully, the only one that want to listen to the deepest parts of your soul... sadly u can't see him only he can...

only if in realy human forme someone would gadly do the same thing... ):

darken sight

2011-07-18T14:36:00.000-07:00

photo taken by: me

day's just seem to be more grey and dark day by day....

try-n to break through the problems ahead, but when i'm face to face with them, it's not just a matter of go against it, it's also if you can break them down.

one hammer smash wont work, then you go for a second, when that doesn't work you try for a thrid, but by the time you do you'r third, you feel so tired and annoyed. and right now i want to give up once agian... i can't seem to be capable for helping myself get back up and into the game, and if i can't, neither can anyone.

so i guess the emo sad littel moonchild girl is back agian, aiya.... vat can i dooooooooo?

tonight and wonderland (janice)

2011-05-27T18:50:00.001-07:00

hope you enjoy it comment and rate on the vid thanx

i'm all of what u have just mentioned (todays not my day)

2011-05-23T13:40:00.000-07:00

yea, like no kidding.... i have changed in a bad way, more negative, cry a lot, act stupid, careless....

my mothers like your so stupid and unconsidered, yea okay like if i did'n no that.... and then she says i am careless and selfish, yes that too i may be selfish but not as much as the ppl i'm around with. and yes i was careless the day i was born.

yes just when i use to think that dreaming about things that might not happen is stupid, i am wrong, i have found out the more you dream about it and hope for it, it will sure come to you... keep on dreaming little girl.

keep it up and stay happy

YOUR SMILE

2011-05-21T22:55:00.000-07:00

Show me your smile
Show me real love
Hikari demo kage demo nai
Show me your smile
Show me real love
Mirai ja nai kako demo nai

Kuroi sora kodoku na tsukiakari
Mou mayowanai
Sagashite ita sekai mitsuketa kara

You are looking the wrong way
You feel that you are not enough
Sabishii me de nani wo motomete
You can find your true self
It can't wait to come to life
Let go the pressure
Imi ga nai

This is the singer i love the most, signs any kind of rock, a lot of English lyrics, and there not always about love, which i love

out of jail

2011-05-21T22:44:00.000-07:00

finely i am out of that stupid dinner with a bunch of stupid ppl... more like my enemies, bullies and aunties that think they're so smart... what i have to suffer this like2-3 times a year. ); forced to go... this is like the last time i will go, even though there are 2 more stupid dinners with them thus year... y would i even eat dinner with a bun ch of ppl that bully me... so painful, i don't even speak when i go there, every time i go there i don't even feel like eating. this time once i walked into the house my legs went freezing cooled then it was shaking );..... plz save me
---------------------------------------------

if any one has any great bands to introduce to me plz do, i need a new band to replace superchick, cuz I'm not aloud to listen to them anymore....

where can you find.....

2011-05-17T17:34:00.000-07:00

so today while i was standing at the parking lot, waiting for pick up, i saw 2 couples, the guy wanting to break up with the girl. i see them everyday, so sweet and cute together, but when i was standing there, i felt the pain of the girl, she was grabbing on the guys arm really hard but every time the guy would pushed it away. from what i herd the guy must have misunderstood, or was just not trusting the girl, only becuz she was covering up something. so is this one of the big and easy ways a guy would try to get rid of a girl, they do it all the time when maybe they get annoyed with the girl or they see another one. this may not be the case but thats how i see it. she already told him she did not cover up but the guy would not listen..... and i think, maybe there really is no true love in this world, and love being one of the great things god has given us. not only that, but u don't find genuine affection through anyone, all heartless and cold blooded to other ppl, besides the one they love and things they enjoy. and then after they both run off, i see a double date.... weird......

2 stories, 2 sides to it (insulant )

2011-05-13T22:37:00.000-07:00

i herd 2 stories this week almost about the same things, they have different sides to it. they were both about insulant....
one i herd today was a guy that had diabetes(i think) and he will have to inject insulant as medication. i felt bad knowing that he can't eat as normal as the rest of us and that he would have bruises from having 8 injections a day ): well he had a positive view to this, he said that " i ate healthy foods like whole grain breads, and also it made the ppl around him being aware of what they eat too" that was good for me to learn from him...

the second one is my friends cute little baby "Spencer(guinea pig)" he has a common disease that most guinea pigs will get, a lack of vitemine "C" which was almost impossible, and it had to do the same thing too take medication and coast $500 for every thing. well as i saw it take it's med, i felt bad for the little guy, it shook it's head around not wanting to take it...... after that we gave him sweet orange and he was eating really really fast nibbling on it, and when my friend pulled it away from him, he still garbed on to the orange not wanting to let go.(hope it get well soon) now all i think that effects him to be like that is the area he is in, the whole family is just in a bad situation right now and having one family member begging to emotional to things can be big effect. today once again i saw her cry, i felt so sad for her, but good for her still being able to deal with all the problems she is facing.
-----------------------------------------------------

this week I've been so happy, i was trying to think different, now even though i'm not aloud to listen to superchicks any more, i was still able to go through with no problem, now all i have to do is keep this up. one song says "happiness is free if u want it to be" and all i have to do is think right, not just try to be positive but have everything go well..... AND BEING HAPPY makes my life so joyful and everything i do i had a bit more energy, even though i half fainted today :P

walking by(photo's)

2011-05-09T21:25:00.000-07:00

the guitar one is my art work<3

a page i liked from someones art book

he's just the cutest thing ever

move ahead

nothing in this world is ever reserved for me, i have to go own it myself.

world without you

2011-05-06T16:37:00.000-07:00

today i just had a flash back of all those old times when i was bulled, i never rememberer that i was actually bulled that much. i was already bulled when i started grade one.... sigh, and i remember thinking to myself that no one cared, all cold blooded, i tried to tell some friends about it, but they went on playing ): i get bulled for almost every thing, but it doesn't really matter any more..... what matters is now, but doesn't seem like i have anything to make me move on, cuz i'm so miserable, and to stop having people make me remember about all the sad things.... i'll be ISOlating myself.... i do that a lot, it's not like it's that bad, my whole life i felt that way already.......

may and june calender

2011-05-04T18:05:00.001-07:00

i guess i am fussing around about ppl, this is my longest rant lolz

2011-05-03T22:15:00.000-07:00

I can’t even tell which one of my friends is good and bad to me. All my good friends slowly slip away out of my sight, and the ones that are left… they don’t care a bit about me… well at least that’s what I think it is. I’m just in the middle of their problems and conversations, they tell me all the things they’ve been up to and the latest things they are addicted to. Okay maybe that’s just how a good friend should be liked, but then can’t we just share each other’s likings and feelings, it’s not that I mind all this listening, but now since I found out that no matter what I try to say, no one cares, selfish people, not that I’m not one at times but they never seem to like to hear me talk, they never try to understand me and care about me, so that’s why it might seem so boring to listen to me talking about what I fee at that moment. I think it’s my time, a time for me to care for me a bit more, well as for this week it is, maybe next week it be back to the same old thing.
but... why can't i whine to you about celia?
5/1/2011 8:59:34 PM queen kong Bernard Ng CUZ I NEVER WHINE TO YOU
5/1/2011 8:59:38 PM queen kong Bernard Ng NOT TO ANYONE
5/1/2011 8:59:44 PM queen kong Bernard Ng MMH
5/1/2011 8:59:49 PM Bernard Ng queen kong go ahead...
5/1/2011 8:59:53 PM Bernard Ng queen kong i have nothing better to do
5/1/2011 9:00:00 PM Bernard Ng queen kong CELIA is Adorable...
5/1/2011 9:00:07 PM queen kong Bernard Ng BUT I WONY CUZ U NEVER CARE
5/1/2011 9:00:10 PM queen kong Bernard Ng WONT*
5/1/2011 9:00:12 PM Bernard Ng queen kong uh..
5/1/2011 9:00:15 PM Bernard Ng queen kong do i?
5/1/2011 9:00:17 PM Bernard Ng queen kong or are u sure?
5/1/2011 9:00:48 PM queen kong Bernard Ng YES U DON'T
5/1/2011 9:00:54 PM Bernard Ng queen kong fb's full of bin laden is now dead
5/1/2011 9:01:27 PM Bernard Ng queen kong and officialy exploeded on twitter
5/1/2011 9:31:43 PM Bernard Ng queen kong can u help me out for a second?
5/1/2011 9:31:52 PM queen kong Bernard Ng sure
5/1/2011 9:32:01 PM queen kong Bernard Ng okay a second has past
5/1/2011 9:32:04 PM queen kong Bernard Ng lolz
5/1/2011 9:32:06 PM queen kong Bernard Ng jkjk

I DON'T THINK I WOULD EVER THINK OF DYING IF IT WERE NOT HIGHSCHOOL
5/2/2011 9:03:58 PM queen kong Bernard Ng I WAS ALLWAYS HAPPY, BRIGHT AND SHINE THROUGH(THATS WHAT ALL TEACHERS SAY)
5/2/2011 9:04:17 PM queen kong Bernard Ng HIGHSCHOOL JUST MAKES ME MORE STUPID AND ANNOYD
5/2/2011 9:04:26 PM queen kong Bernard Ng AND I FEEL LIKE IN JAIL
5/2/2011 9:04:33 PM queen kong Bernard Ng I HATE LIFE LIKE THIS
5/2/2011 9:05:07 PM queen kong Bernard Ng IF IT WASN'T FOR MY MOTHER, I WOULD TO GET OUT OF SCHOOL
5/2/2011 9:05:12 PM queen kong Bernard Ng AND NOT EVEN TAKE SCHOOL
5/2/2011 9:08:48 PM Bernard Ng queen kong ...
5/2/2011 9:08:55 PM queen kong Bernard Ng yea
5/2/2011 9:09:03 PM queen kong Bernard Ng i don't expect u to say anything
5/2/2011 9:09:44 PM queen kong Bernard Ng see you will never understand
5/2/2011 9:11:40 PM Bernard Ng queen kong uhhh
5/2/2011 9:11:52 PM Bernard Ng queen kong i'm reading comments on what ppl think of green party of canada
5/2/2011 9:15:33 PM Bernard Ng queen kong anyways
5/2/2011 9:15:54 PM Bernard Ng queen kong how many problems in your mind do you need to solve?
5/2/2011 9:16:34 PM Bernard Ng queen kong cuz i only have 2 :P (what's best for celia, and how different is that from what i want)
5/2/2011 9:16:44 PM queen kong Bernard Ng lets see
5/2/2011 9:16:56 PM queen kong Bernard Ng well there is one big one that kead to many other problems
5/2/2011 9:17:01 PM Bernard Ng queen kong well
5/2/2011 9:17:11 PM queen kong Bernard Ng 5
5/2/2011 9:17:15 PM Bernard Ng queen kong we'll solve one by one
5/2/2011 9:17:21 PM Bernard Ng queen kong big ones...
5/2/2011 9:17:21 PM queen kong Bernard Ng and those are the main ones
5/2/2011 9:17:31 PM Bernard Ng queen kong i would love to here them... and help
5/2/2011 9:17:35 PM Bernard Ng queen kong cuz i have nothing better to do
5/2/2011 9:17:49 PM queen kong Bernard Ng what a nice friend -__-
5/2/2011 9:18:01 PM queen kong Bernard Ng so did u actually read my blog?
5/2/2011 9:18:11 PM Bernard Ng queen kong but first i have to decide do i want bio in the morning or afternoon
5/2/2011 9:18:17 PM Bernard Ng queen kong brb
5/2/2011 9:33:05 PM Bernard Ng queen kong back
5/2/2011 9:33:14 PM queen kong Bernard Ng okay......
5/2/2011 9:33:20 PM queen kong Bernard Ng so when is it
5/2/2011 9:33:28 PM queen kong Bernard Ng afternoon?
5/2/2011 9:33:35 PM Bernard Ng queen kong morning
5/2/2011 9:33:47 PM queen kong Bernard Ng which school
5/2/2011 9:33:58 PM Bernard Ng queen kong jnb
5/2/2011 9:34:02 PM queen kong Bernard Ng ohhhh
5/2/2011 9:34:04 PM Bernard Ng queen kong ventouras's room
5/2/2011 9:34:06 PM Bernard Ng queen kong :(
5/2/2011 9:34:14 PM Bernard Ng queen kong a207
5/2/2011 9:34:23 PM queen kong Bernard Ng yes!!!!!!!
5/2/2011 9:34:30 PM queen kong Bernard Ng the room full of her sickness
5/2/2011 9:34:30 PM Bernard Ng queen kong it was that or venoutras room afternoon
5/2/2011 9:34:35 PM queen kong Bernard Ng and bactirum
5/2/2011 9:36:36 PM queen kong Bernard Ng so?
5/2/2011 9:36:42 PM Bernard Ng queen kong where do u wanna start?
5/2/2011 9:36:56 PM queen kong Bernard Ng whAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
5/2/2011 9:37:01 PM queen kong Bernard Ng THAT WAS WEIRD
5/2/2011 9:37:06 PM Bernard Ng queen kong ur problems?
5/2/2011 9:37:07 PM queen kong Bernard Ng NO IT SOUNDED WEIRD
5/2/2011 9:37:18 PM Bernard Ng queen kong ...
5/2/2011 9:37:21 PM queen kong Bernard Ng LOLZ
5/2/2011 9:37:27 PM queen kong Bernard Ng I NEVR EVER SAID THAT TO U
5/2/2011 9:37:58 PM queen kong Bernard Ng CUZ, IT'S BETTER IF U LET THE PERSON NO WHAT U FEEL AND WHATS THE PROBLEM
5/2/2011 9:40:23 PM Bernard Ng queen kong ...
5/2/2011 9:40:59 PM queen kong Bernard Ng yea
5/2/2011 9:41:01 PM queen kong Bernard Ng okay.....
5/2/2011 9:41:03 PM queen kong Bernard Ng now what
5/2/2011 9:41:42 PM Bernard Ng queen kong what's ur first main problem?
5/2/2011 9:42:11 PM queen kong Bernard Ng do i have to say it out
5/2/2011 9:42:16 PM queen kong Bernard Ng :(
5/2/2011 9:42:39 PM Bernard Ng queen kong me
5/2/2011 9:43:17 PM queen kong Bernard Ng ????
5/2/2011 9:43:49 PM Bernard Ng queen kong i'm the problem
5/2/2011 9:43:59 PM Bernard Ng queen kong always complaining about not being with celia constantly :D
5/2/2011 9:44:13 PM queen kong Bernard Ng what?
5/2/2011 9:44:17 PM queen kong Bernard Ng okay.....weird
5/2/2011 9:44:24 PM queen kong Bernard Ng so it all goes back to her
5/2/2011 9:47:36 PM queen kong Bernard Ng okay my problem is everything
5/2/2011 9:47:37 PM queen kong Bernard Ng lolz
5/2/2011 9:49:02 PM queen kong Bernard Ng whatever i'll tell u
5/2/2011 9:49:09 PM queen kong Bernard Ng but i hate saying those words
5/2/2011 9:49:44 PM queen kong Bernard Ng learning disaility(2 kinds) 1)reading 2)writing
5/2/2011 9:49:54 PM queen kong Bernard Ng and then more stuffs connected to tose 2
5/2/2011 9:49:58 PM queen kong Bernard Ng like math and stuffs
5/2/2011 9:52:13 PM queen kong Bernard Ng coped from my blog: some how i was born to have a learning problem where reading and writing is a littel difficult for me, the thing is my parents don't have it and its so hard having this problem, so many things are very hard for me and with all my friends that are smart that is even more hard.It gives me pressur to get better in my grades.
5/2/2011 9:52:28 PM queen kong Bernard Ng now help me
5/2/2011 9:53:33 PM queen kong Bernard Ng if u tried to google thAT, I'LL GET PISSED OFF
5/2/2011 9:53:53 PM Bernard Ng queen kong ...
5/2/2011 9:54:01 PM queen kong Bernard Ng SOOOOOO
5/2/2011 9:54:06 PM queen kong Bernard Ng HAVE ANYTHING TO SAY
5/2/2011 9:54:23 PM queen kong Bernard Ng I WONT BE SURPRISED IF U HADE NONE
5/2/2011 9:54:27 PM Bernard Ng queen kong how much more difficult
5/2/2011 9:54:27 PM queen kong Bernard Ng HAD*
5/2/2011 9:54:39 PM Bernard Ng queen kong actually i have problems myself... i don't know what to do about celia
5/2/2011 9:54:46 PM queen kong Bernard Ng AND
5/2/2011 9:54:48 PM Bernard Ng queen kong and it is the end of the world
5/2/2011 9:54:56 PM Bernard Ng queen kong and i wanna a fairytale
5/2/2011 9:55:05 PM Bernard Ng queen kong ~ now that i said it, i feel a ton better

So somehow the whole convo goes back to talking about him….. whatever, but I did cry about this. Cuz for 7 years I’ve been trying hard to keep this secrete, and I was so stupid to tell someone like him about that. Have I not made a big fool of myself a million times, y am I doing this again.

butterfly

2011-05-03T21:23:00.000-07:00

graceful butterfly's, if only i can learn to be as peaceful and calm like them. i'm already trying to hide away from the people that try to bother me, but then my heart and mind just get's really frustrated and annoyed. 2 cups of coffee a day, not good . just when can they leave me alone, i already made a fool of myself.