my convertible life

Pippipalooza 2012: It's On

2012-02-22T22:35:00.000-05:00

Hard to believe, but it's already time for Pippipalooza again -- my baby girl turned four today.

Four.

There's been lots of time spent lately on everything except blogging, but I hope to catch up soon. In the meantime, you can celebrate with Pippi by checking out her post from Monday on I Dressed Myself. See how she can turn one set of clothes into three outfits over the course of one day.

Just one of her many amazing talents.

Happy birthday, baby girl!

And in case that's not enough, you can always go back in time:
Pippipalooza 2011
Pippipalooza 2010 (which was really only one post)

Friday's 5: Kitchen Remodel

2012-02-17T06:30:00.000-05:00

Part four of an occasional series about what I'm enjoying in my "new" house one year after we started our big renovation project.

We saved the kitchen for last during the renovation, knowing that it would be the most disruptive part of a very messy process. You may recall my tips for eating when you don't have a kitchen -- and I've already shown you some of the before-and-after shots of the kitchen.

The change was dramatic and wonderful. But the more we live in our kitchen, the more I discover that it's the little things that make me love it the most. Here are five of my favorite details:

1. Drawers: In a space that used to have four small drawers and a jumble of cabinets, we now have three big-ass drawers. The top one has silverware and cooking utensils, while the middle has foil, bags and other related items. But the bottom drawer is the genius one -- contains both tupperware and my kids' plastic plates and cups so that they can serve themselves. Plus, all of our drawers (and cabinet doors) have this awesome soft-close feature, so you can just give it a push and it closes gently the rest of the way. (The only danger with that feature is that now I go around accidentally slamming the cabinets in the bathrooms and other places, but it's a price I'm willing to pay.)

2. Window wall: The kitchen window, which looks out over the backyard, is a stroke of genius recommended by our architect. It's a casement window, so it opens out on a crank instead of raising up on a sash. This is perfect over the sink for two reasons: it's super easy to open (no leaning over the sink to push a stuck sash) and there's no bar right at eye-level (where the two sashes meet) to block my view. I also love the open shelves beside the window (there are some on the other side, too) -- less bulky than cabinets and a pretty way to display fun things. Plus it keeps the wine glasses at the ready.

3. Sliding shelves: I used to store my crockpot on the dining room table, the electric frying pan on top of the fridge and other big pots/pans so far back in a corner cabinet that I practically had to crawl inside to get them out. Now I just open the cabinet doors, slide out the shelves and select whatever I need. And we can actually eat dinner at the dining room table now.

4. Smoothie station: Because we make smoothies every morning, we keep the blender on the counter along with an excess of bananas (I usually buy 12 at a time). So we carved out this little counter area between the fridge and the pantry cabinets to have a space for making smoothies. We also store the toaster and the electric can opener in the cabinet below, so everything is close to an outlet.

5. Spice rack: When we took out the top half of the wall between the kitchen and dining room, I lost the over-the-stove cabinet where I used to keep spices, oils, etc. So when we redesigned the kitchen, there was just enough room to tuck this handy spice/oil sliding cabinet beside the stove. It keeps everything right where I need it and doesn't require having a spice rack on the counter.

What little details do you love best about your kitchen? Or what spaces would you most like to change?

Check out the rest of this series...
- Part 1: Powder Room
- Part 2: Dining Room
- Part 3: Family Room

Marital Threats and How You Can Help

2012-02-16T10:23:00.000-05:00

Somehow, I just can't believe that 76-year-old Lennie and 87-year-old Pearl are a threat to my "traditional" marriage.

And yet, conservative politicians, religious leaders and other groups keep trying to convince me that allowing homosexuals to get married threatens the very foundations of the institution of marriage.

Yeah, right.

I'm here to tell you that what threatens my marriage is not the notion that my across-the-street neighbor might one day want to marry his adorable boyfriend, or that my friend a few streets over is planning to have a baby with her girlfriend. And I definitely do not see a clear and present danger in two septuagenarian/octogenarian women who have loved each other faithfully for 45 years while making great contributions to their community and generally being nice people.

If you really must know, here are a few things that are an actual threat to the health of my one-man-one-woman, walked-down-the-aisle, have-a-license-to-prove-it marriage:

My children get up absurdly early. Every. Single. Day. My son is up AND DRESSED no later than 6 a.m. Even on Saturdays -- okay, he's still in his pajamas on the weekend, but he's up nonetheless. My daughter, convinced she might miss out on something fun, is up with him at the same time. And they expect to be entertained. Otherwise they start whining and annoying each other.
My husband has his own opinions and ideas. I mean, I thought he was just going to agree with me. Who knew he'd have his own vision about decorating the house, planning vacations or scheduling our weekends. Now we have to work together and compromise to get things done -- this means disagreeing sometimes, even arguing or fighting occasionally. After 10 years, there are no deal breakers, but it still takes work.
Babysitters can be expensive. In order for us to spend time together without our kids to nurture our relationship, we have to hire a babysitter. Then we have to go somewhere, which means spending more money. Without even doing anything fancy, we can easily spend $100 on a evening out. It might actually be cheaper to go to a marriage counselor who offered childcare in the waiting room than to plan a date night.
Social media is a time suck. After the kids go to bed, when we should probably be engaged in quality conversation together, we both tumble down the rabbit hole of Twitter, blogging, Words with Friends, Angry Birds, Pinterest, Gentlemint and a hundred other online traps. Not that there's anything wrong with reading blogs (ahem), but it does keep our focus off of each other.
Downton Abbey and Mad Men are too good. Again with the night-time distractions. But seriously -- how can we focus on each other when there's Lady Mary and Don Draper to worry about? Plus there's Modern Family and 30 Rock when we need a laugh, or Psych and White Collar when we want some investigating, or Portlandia when it's time for something random and hilarious. That TiVo box is seriously hazardous to our marital health.
The house is not self-cleaning. Even if we manage to turn off the TV and other electronics, there's still the laundry to fold, the dishes to wash, the grass to mow, the bathrooms to clean, the dinner to cook, the lunches to make, the bills to pay, the groceries to buy, the appointments to schedule. It would take six adults running this house in order to free up enough time for us to really stop and just be with each other. Again, Downton Abbey seems like a good idea.

So if you're really serious about wanting to protect North Carolina families and preserve healthy marriages across the state, you have a few options:

a. You can volunteer to babysit my children for the weekend free of charge.
b. You can donate time or money to an organization like Protect NC Families, the Equality NC Foundation, Race to the Ballot or We Are NC -- or attend the Love Wins dance this weekend in Durham.
c. You can make sure you're registered to vote NO on May 8.
d. All of the above.

Just let me know when you're ready to schedule that babysitting weekend.

Best Friends Forever

2012-02-06T20:50:00.001-05:00

Every girl needs at least one long-time, old school BFF.

That friend who loved you when you were an awkward teen-ager and still loves you when you're both heading into your 40s. The one you can call and pick up right where you left off, without explanations or apologies. The one who knows your whole family and all your skeletons and would never think of using any of them against you. The one who has an arsenal of big hair 80s photos of you and hasn't posted a single image to Facebook.

I'm absurdly lucky to have more than one of those friends -- just a few treasured women who have known me for almost three decades and remain a part of my life, even before we had email and social media (gasp!) for keeping in touch.

There are many wonderful women in my life -- my list of good friends is an embarrassment of riches. They've been neighbors and classmates, colleagues and roommates. Some friendships I've wandered into and others I've ~~wooed~~ strategically planned.

But there's nothing quite like that best friend since age 12.

We live in different cities and don't get to see each other very often -- life sometimes has a way of getting in the way. Even when we don't visit or talk regularly, I feel better just knowing she's out there if I need her.

And that's why I'm so sad tonight. Because my friend Marty lost her best friend Susan today.

Although I felt like I knew Susan thanks to Marty's stories and connections on social media, we never actually met. I loved her anyway -- not only because she seemed like an incredible person, but mostly and simply because she loved my friend.

We are too young to lose a best friend. I have nothing useful to say to Marty except that I am so incredibly sorry for her loss. And that I will probably bring over a casserole at some point, because that is what we do.

In the meantime, I will be saying prayers of thanksgiving and peace -- for Susan and her family, for Marty, for my friends from all stages of my life.

Name Dropping

2012-02-01T09:01:00.000-05:00

This is the conversation that Pippi and I had in the car on the way to preschool this morning.

Pippi: Mommy, do you know Anna Lewis?

Me: Sure, I know Anna Lewis. She's in your class at school.

[Long pause]

Pippi: Mommy, do you know B.B. King?

Me: Umm. I know who B.B. King is. Do you know B.B. King?

Pippi: Yes! I see him at the coffee shop. [pause] Does his guitar have a name?

Me: Yes, it does. Do you know his guitar, too?

Pippi: Is it Lucille?

Me: Yes [laughing], actually it is Lucille. Is that funny?

Pippi: [cracking up] I'm going to call Anna Lewis "Lucille"!

* * *

Not to ruin the comedy, but just as background... Pippi's dad sometimes takes her to a nearby coffee shop on Saturday mornings. Apparently there's a picture of B.B. King on the wall, so they've talked about him and his music while they're having Saturday scones. Just goes to show that kids are really listening sometimes -- and there's no telling when they're going to share what they remember from those conversations.

Image borrowed from The Silver Tongue.

When Fashion Happens

2012-01-25T07:30:00.000-05:00

There was this girl in Junius's 2-year-old preschool class who wore something smocked and monogrammed. Every. Single. Day.

You know what I'm talking about -- the matching ruffly outfits, the seasonally decorated dresses, the ready-for-a-professional-portrait clothes. The girl with nothing from Old Navy or Target in her closet.

She ended up being one of his best buddies because beneath those fancy duds was a really fun little girl. But I teased her mother regularly about the outfits.

Why in the world to do you do that to her, I would ask. It's just preschool, not a fashion show.

Her answer? "Because it's fun and I can and it won't last forever."

I still thought she was crazy.

Until I had Pippi.

Let me tell you, no matter what you might believe before it happens, having a daughter is not the same as having a son. I enjoyed dressing Juni in cute outfits as a baby, but nothing compares to little girl clothes. The vast and unending realm of patterns and ruffles and layers and smocking completely overwhelms the tiny little boy section of stores.

Although I never got to the smocked-every-single-day level (mostly because my budget wouldn't allow it), I did so love dressing her in adorable outfits. I even let a photographer friend use her as a photo model for a fashion project because she just looked too cute (I mean, seriously, just look at that picture!).

And then Pippi decided she wanted to dress herself.

[Cue sound of screeching brakes]

After far too many knock-down-drag-out fights over what she was supposed to wear to preschool last fall, I finally just gave up. I decided that as long as she was wearing something weather-appropriate, she could pick out her own outfits most days (I reserved the right to put her in smocked for church).

I knew it was the right call on the morning we went grocery shopping -- Pippi was wearing pink leggings, a white long-sleeved shirt, a satin floral sleeveless bubble dress that was two sizes too big, silver glitter shoes and a tiara. The 50-something woman in the elevator with us looked at her with a big grin and said, "You dressed yourself this morning, didn't you? You look very beautiful!"

She was right. Pippi did look beautiful. And it was quite obvious that she'd dressed herself -- no one was judging my personal style or my parenting skills because of Pippi's own sense of flair.

In order to really enjoy this fashion as it happens, I started taking pictures of her outfits -- trying to catch the essence of Pippi style.

So I'm happy to share with you my latest venture: I Dressed Myself. It's a new blog about how the best fashion happens when mommy and daddy aren't involved. I hope you'll check it out, follow along and maybe even share some of your own gems. There's a few posts there already and I plan to post at least one new outfit a week -- because there's no better way to keep myself sane than to enjoy the wealth of blog material in my crazy life.

photo credit to evolve studio photography

Friday's 5: Books for Pippi

2012-01-19T20:10:00.000-05:00

I've been binge reading again. This time it was The Hunger Games trilogy -- in total, I read all three books in about five days. Would have been faster, but I decided to sleep some here and there.

Highly recommend the books -- but as a public service announcement, I should caution you not to start them unless you have a few days to spend doing nothing but reading. Or unless you don't really need to sleep at night.

The good news is that I'm not the only who's been finding good things to read lately. My kids are having fun digging into their own books. Like me, Junius is getting into some good series -- The Magic Tree House and A to Z Mysteries are currently at the top of his list.

Pippi isn't actually reading, but she's got some strong preferences. Lots of Barbie and My Little Pony books, which I can't stand (sorry if those are your beloved books). But also these five titles that I enjoyed along with her.

Miss Fannie's Hat by Jan Karon and Toni Goffe: Miss Fannie is 90 years old and owns just about as many hats. The story is sweet, but I think it's the illustrations of all those hats that Pippi liked best.
Every Cowgirl Needs Dancing Boots by Rebecca Janni and Lynne Avril: As a girl with her own pink dancing boots, Pippi was bound to like this one. I like the main character for her unwillingness to give up on finding fun friends.
Tallulah's Tutu by Marilyn Singer and Alexandra Boiger: We probably should have named Pippi "Tallulah" in real life -- I'm sure that's one of the reasons why she likes this book so much. That, plus the dancing, the tutu and the fiesty main character.
The Skin You Live In by Michael Tyler and David Lee Csicsko: Without getting all preachy and political, this book uses cute illustrations and fun rhymes to point out that not everyone has the same skin -- but we can all feel good about the skin we've got.
Louise the Big Cheese (Divine Diva) by Elise Primavera and Diane Goode: Louise doesn't get picked for the role of Cinderella in the school play, but she doesn't let that stop her from saving the show.

So what are you (or your kids) reading this weekend? Share your recent favorites in the comments below.

Note: All links go to the titles at Quail Ridge Books & Music, which is my wonderful local independent bookseller. If you don't have your own independent bookseller close by, I'm happy to let you borrow mine -- order online and let them ship to you. QRB does not compensate me for linking to their site, but I love them anyway.

Watching Him Go

2012-01-17T22:02:00.001-05:00

Somehow it never gets any easier. More manageable, but not actually easier.

I still ache when I leave him somewhere.

Yes, Junius is six-and-a-half (and we all know how critical that extra "half" can be). And yes, he's fine and will have fun and will somehow manage to stay safe without my hovering over him.

But knowing those things hasn't stopped the lump in my throat, the feeling of my heart dropping into into my stomach.

Last week it was hockey track-out camp, where he didn't know anyone. Even pumped up with shoulder pads and standing taller than usual on his ice skates, he seemed so little as he walked away. I loitered in the lobby, wondering if he might turn around and change his mind about staying. The camp lasted for five full days, but he asked me to pick him up after lunch each day -- and, of course, I did.

This week it's grandparent camp, where he gets to be the center of the universe for four days with my in-laws and then my parents. Today he practically pushed me out the door so he could have alone time with his grandmother. Every night this week I will call him before bed, listening to him recounting his day and helping me hold onto the illusion of tucking him in. Having only one child will make my week easier, but strangely lonely.

It's a cruel trick of parenting. When they're here, they are crazy, exhausting, unrelenting, needy -- some days I want nothing more than to walk away for an hour alone. But when they're gone, their absence doesn't bring simple relief -- although it does create a quiet that is welcome, for a bit, until it's not.

Already I know I will cry when he leaves for overnight camp, for college, for study abroad, for some job in another state. I will want him to do all of those things, will put on a brave face for him so that he will trust his decision to go, will be unreasonably proud of his accomplishments.

But it will not be easy watching him go.

Color Me Crazy

2012-01-12T15:59:00.001-05:00

Anyone who suggests that I'm a neat, tidy, organized kind of person doesn't really know me -- or has only been over to my house when I'm expecting company.

The counters and tables are regularly covered in piles and I shudder to think what our bathrooms would look like without help from a housekeeper. Even my desk at work is a mangled mish-mash of lists, notebooks, brochures and reports.

But I do like for everything to have a place -- and ideally for all those things to be in said places.

Particularly when it comes to Play-Doh. I mean, there's a reason that each color comes in its own container with the little color-coded lid, right?

So why does my daughter love to inflict so much pain by doing this?

Watching her gleefully smush all the colors together actually makes my palms itch. Or maybe that's just an ingredient in the Play-Doh. Either way, it's all I can do to let her enjoy it the way she wants to.

When she's busy building something, I catch myself at least trying to group the rainbow lumps into color-themed piles (note the pinkish, bluish and yellowish balls above). But it doesn't work. She sees what I'm doing and starts taking chunks of my piles and blending them into a new shape.

So how do I keep from destroying one of her creative outlets by enforcing my organizational rules into her game? I turn to my own creative outlet -- writing -- to get me out of her way.

Now excuse me while I go check out Pippi's newest creation: the pinkyellowgreenbluetanpurple double-winged, four-eyed wedding bird.
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Say Cheese

2012-01-09T08:33:00.000-05:00

A year ago, you saw what happens when Pippi takes the camera. This year, she's focusing more on herself than the house.

There's no profound message here. Those expressions just made me laugh -- plus the close, chin-multiplying angle she gets by having preschooler arms.

Happy New Year! Hope 2012 is bringing smiles.

2011 Convertible Life in Review

2011-12-31T20:46:00.000-05:00

Thanks to friends who (like us) have young children and aren't planning to party through midnight tonight, we celebrated "Happy Noon Year" today with friends, neighbors and lots and lots of kids.

So if you're like us (admit it, you can't stay up past midnight unless you're reading The Hunger Games -- oh wait, that's me) and you don't have big plans, you can entertain yourself with this recap of posts from 2011. This list isn't necessarily the most popular posts, but they're a selection of posts I liked writing or ones that capture something particular to the past year.

Happy reading -- and hope to see you in 2012!

January: Still Catholic After All These Years
Where I wrestle with my religion some more.

February: Saturday Strategery: Moving to the Big Girl Bed
Where I come to terms with the fact that my baby doesn't need her crib.

March: Moody Toddler Available to a Good Home
Where I admit that I don't always enjoy the company of my daughter.

April: The F-Word
Where Junius gives me a vocabulary heart attack.

May: Is That a Leak in My Ceiling or Just My Own Tears?)
Where I am more than done with home renovation projects.

June: Hair
Where Junius tries out a bold new look.

July: Camping: A Timeline
Where we go family camping and live to tell about it.

August: Big Teeth
Where Junius grows up when I'm not looking.

September: Tenth Anniversary of 9/11
Where I remember the day and am grateful for blessings.

October: Dread
Where I terrify you into wearing sunscreen.

November: Love Letters
Where my dad shows me he loves me.

December: The Burden of Making Decisions
Where I bemoan one of the hardest parts of parenting and complain some about schools.

If you've made it this far, then you've earned some credit for yourself. Share a link from your own blog (or one you like to read, if you're not a blogger yourself) in the comments to take us to one of your own favorites from 2011.
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Friday's 5: Christmas Decorations

2011-12-29T20:56:00.000-05:00

Many of you probably kicked your Christmas tree to the curb on Monday. You Scroogey Grinches, you.

But because I have a strict no-tree-before-my-birthday policy, I'm not tired of our Christmas decorations just yet. In fact, I like to keep them up until Epiphany, although sometimes they come down a little earlier because we need to get it done over a weekend.

So in honor of the festivities still lingering around my house, here are five of my favorites from holiday decorating this year:

1. Mantel: This is the first year we've actually had a mantel in a long time, so I loved having a place to hang stockings and display my nutcracker collection. Throw in some branches trimmed from the tree and a sparkly Target wreath and it all fills in quite nicely.

2. Window: No drapes in the dining room? No problem. Just hang some of those leftover balls that wouldn't fit on the tree. They're even pretty at night, but especially fun sparkling in the sun during the day.

3. Cards: We're lucky to receive lots of cards from friends and family across the globe -- but I've never had a good way to display them all. This year I stretched string across those quick-release hooks along the empty dining room wall, covered the hooks with bows and used kid-painted clothes pins to hold the cards on. Next year, I think I'll do three rows so I don't have to cram them in so tight.

4. Napkin rings: These little gems are not only festive and useful for setting the holiday table, they also provided a craft project that distracted my kids for about 15 minutes while I was cooking on Christmas Eve morning. Just cut toilet paper tubes into thirds, cover with stickers and enjoy an instantly festive table.

5. Carolers: If you've been reading this blog for a couple of years, you know I can't take credit for these winners. My crafty neighbor one-upped herself again (see brilliance from 2010 and 2009), using my one leftover Halloween pumpkin and four of her own to create this caroling crowd that she left on my doorstep. In case you can't see their song sheets, they're singing "Silent Night" (*snort*). You can only wish you lived across the street from her, too.

So what was your favorite holiday decorating trick this season? Share your best so we can add it to our list for next year.
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Guest Room Gone Wrong

2011-12-18T21:15:00.001-05:00

Update 12.29.11: It worked! Thanks to Molly's contest with Tempur-Pedic, we'll be getting a brand new bed!

Recently I've shared some of my favorite details from our big renovation project, along with pictures of my house. But in case you think that my home is all clean and sparkly and new without any mess or chaos, let me make a little confession.

My guest room? Total disaster.

So when Molly Gold announced a contest inviting her fans to share a video story of the worst guest room they've ever stayed in, well...

I'll let you see for yourself.

Nonna and Grandpa -- I promise we'll be ready for you by Saturday. And if it weren't for the prospect of winning a Tempur-Pedic bed (courtesy of Molly), I would never have given you that video tour.
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Friday's 5: Family Room Remodel

2011-12-15T21:11:00.000-05:00

Part three of an occasional series about what I'm enjoying in my "new" house one year after we started our big renovation project.

The dining room isn't the only space that will feel different for the holidays this year -- the family room got a total overhaul as well. Last year we were able to get a tree in there about a week before Christmas, but the room was otherwise mostly empty given that most of our belongings were boxed up in the guest room or stashed in a pod in our driveway.

Now we have a brand new room to enjoy (although it's still the same old furniture) -- we took out a load-bearing column that chopped up the space, installed a steel beam in the ceiling to support the second floor, added recessed lighting, replaced the floor and completely changed the focal wall of the room. Within all those changes, here are the details that I like best about the space...

1. Bookcases: The biggest feature we added to the room is the built-in bookcases flanking the fireplace. As lifelong book nerd and former English teacher, I love having books out and available. There are still more books in boxes upstairs, but at least I've got lots out where I can see them. Plus, what you don't see are all the toys tucked away inside those cabinets.

2. Dictionary shelf: In case having lots of books isn't nerdy enough for you, I also love being able to have a big, fat dictionary open and ready. Yes, I know you can look up anything on the internet. But it's just not the same.

3. Fireplace with mantel: Our old fireplace had a crumbling brick facade and no mantel -- nothing for hanging stockings or displaying treasures. Now we have sparkly mica tile (complete with a keystone) and a gorgeous mantel that ties into the book cases on either side. IT's so pretty that we didn't want to cover it up with a big fireplace screen (and it's just gas logs anyway), so we found this funky metal design with leaves and birds -- a great bit of quirky on an otherwise traditional design.

4. Media cabinet: No, this photo doesn't look pretty. But that's exactly the point. All those cables and boxes and electronics stay hidden inside that cabinet below the TV. And thanks to some kind of magical sensor that my husband installed, the remote works through the wood cabinet doors to run the TiVo box inside.

5. Trim work: The beautiful molding around the bookcases isn't the only trim detail in the room. Our talented architect and carpenter (who also created the bookcases and mantel) added a column effect at the corners of the room, which is open to the kitchen on one end and the foyer/hall on the other end. It's a great touch that helps separate the room (and the wall colors) without taking up any real space in the floor plan.

What little details make your family room great? Or what projects are you plotting to turn the space into the room you're imagining?

Check out the rest of this series...
- Part 1: Powder Room
- Part 2: Dining Room
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The Burden of Making Decisions

2011-12-12T21:04:00.000-05:00

I think I liked it better when we didn’t have all these so-called choices.

The new student assignment plan for Wake County is supposed to create stability and give parents greater control over their children’s educational options. All it’s creating for me is headache and heartburn.

Junius is a first-grader at our original base assignment – a year-round elementary school just over a mile from our house. While it isn’t our “neighborhood school,” it is close by, the schedule works well for us and we’ve had good teachers there.

But under this new plan – for better or for worse – I find myself wondering about other options. Wouldn’t it be great for him to have Spanish instruction every day? Or maybe he’d excel in a program with smaller classes? Or would he get more benefit from the consistency of six years in the same school? And will any of the schools on our list even have seats available for second graders?

One of the toughest things about parenting is the millions of decisions, both small and large, that have to be made every single day. Do you vaccinate? Buy only organic foods? Do you let your daughter wear a tutu to church? When is bedtime? Who do you trust to serve as guardians in your absence? What’s an appropriate punishment for a 3-year-old who tells lies? Is your son sick enough to stay in bed or is he just trying to skip school? Is he too young to watch Star Wars? What school is the best fit?

Where’s my Magic 8-Ball when I need it?

The truth is that I’m tired of being the decider. I just want to know that everything is working out for the best. I want to believe that any school he attends will be the right one, that every teacher will challenge him with high expectations, that his classmates will encourage him to excel, that every experience will help him grow into a successful adult.

So how will I know if we made the right choice?

“Reply hazy, try again.”

Image found here.

Showing Your Work

2011-12-05T20:06:00.001-05:00

Today Junius came home with information about Math Superstars -- it's an extra math program that his teacher offers during lunch once a week to give kids a chance to explore problem-solving and logic beyond what they're doing in class. It involves some extra homework, but also a chance to do independent thinking work.

I'm a supergeek -- we all know that already -- so I'm totally psyched about Math Superstars.

As part of the info packet, his teacher included a sample sheet of problems for a test-run. I'm proud to say that Junius got five out of six problems right without any help. After he finished, we talked through the questions to see how he got to the answers.

This is the one I was most impressed about:

I mean, I didn't expect a first-grader to understand enough about percentages or probability to get that one right. I expected him to pick the bird since that's where the arrow was pointing.

"How did you know the answer was fish?" I asked him.

His response? "Well, I figured that Julio and his parents might be allergic to dogs or birds, but they probably wouldn't be allergic to fish."

Looks like we've got a qualitative -- not so much quantitative -- researcher on our hands.

Friday's 5: Dining Room Remodel

2011-12-02T06:30:00.000-05:00

Part two of an occasional series about what I'm enjoying in my "new" house one year after we started our big renovation project.

Last year, in the midst of renovating most of our downstairs, we hosted Christmas. It wasn't fancy, given that most of our furniture was still outside in a pod in our driveway. But we made it work.

The dining room was only partially finished then, so I'm extra excited about hosting Christmas dinner in there this year. It's not a very big room and mostly square, but here's what I like best about the room...

1. Open space: Because the space was small, we opened it to the kitchen (by removing the top half of the wall) and living room (by widening the doorway and adding the pass-through openings between the columns) to give the illusion of more space. It's a less formal space that way, but it also means that we use it every day now.

2. Woodwork: The wainscoting adds interest to the room and dresses it up a little. It also breaks up the expanse of wall along the side of the house, so we could use a darker wall color above without having it overwhelm the room.

3. Display cabinets: Again, because it's a small room, we didn't want to put a lot of furniture in the space. But we desperately needed storage. So our talented carpenter built cabinets into either side of the doorway with the living room. Now we have beautiful storage/display space inside the cabinets, as well as serving and display space on top.

4. Hidden cabinet: Not as showy, but no less lovely than the display cabinetry is this little wonder tucked into some dead space on the back of the kitchen wall. Our fabulous contractor built the cabinet door right into the wainscoting, so you almost don't even see it -- but it's hiding a huge storage space that otherwise would have been wasted. (Unrelated to the dining room, that pumpkin sitting there is the one I used to make this soup.)

5. Chandelier: The piece de resistance in this room is definitely the chandelier. Originally a gift from my husband's grandparents to his parents when they were married, my mother-in-law passed it on to us a few years ago. We waited until the renovation was complete before installing the fixture. It's tough to capture with my amateur photography (which may or may not have been done with my iPhone), but the design is funky and sparkly and beautiful. Combining the fancy lighting with the rough table adds just a little touch of quirky to the room that makes me very happy.

Now all I have to do is order our Fresh Market holiday dinner, and we're ready to go!

Check out the rest of this series...
- Part 1: Powder Room
- Part 3: Family Room

To the Mom with the Screamer -- Oh, That's Me

2011-11-30T21:06:00.000-05:00

Here's the post I wrote earlier today:

Dear Mom from this afternoon --

You were sitting in the lobby area before dance class with your screaming, crying, wailing daughter clinging to your lap, her face the color of rage. I was running late, so I missed seeing whatever brought on the trauma -- but it sounded like maybe it had something to do with her leggings.

I just wanted to tell you... what, I don't even know. But somehow I wanted to wave a magic wand and make it all stop.

Not because she was bothering me, which she wasn't. Simply because I felt so terrible for you -- both of you -- that your Wednesday afternoon was melting down into madness.

I know that moment. The one where you're silently wrestling over the lesser of two evils: a) standing strong in the face of the fit because dammit you PAID for these dance classes and they ARE fun and she WILL go to class and enjoy it or b) tucking her under your arm and taking her fit-throwing self home because you're both just too exhausted to do anything else.

After more than six years of parenting, I'm no closer to knowing the right answer to that debate.

All I really want you to know is that I'm not judging you, that I stand in solidarity with you and that I hope you got a very early bedtime tonight.
Love,
Me

* * *

But then I had one of those early evenings where everything is going along fine and then, suddenly, Pippi goes completely deaf to the particular pitch of my voice and she ignores every single thing I'm saying to her and loses one of her brand new gloves on the walk home and just grins while I dissolve into fist-clenching frustration.

So she ended up back in this familiar spot while I had a glass of wine and put the pizza in the oven.

And by the time I'm finally back at my computer to finish up this afternoon's post, all I can think is who the hell am I to be offering magic wand wishes to another mom?

Here's hoping that all of us have smoother days tomorrow.
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Singing along with "The Sing-off"

2011-11-21T17:57:00.001-05:00

Reality TV has never been my thing. Unless you count HGTV or the occasional make-over show, I'm just not that into it. Although I will say that Storage Wars is pretty interesting -- but not enough to make me set the TiVo.

Survivor started while I was living overseas -- when I got back, I tuned in once to see what all the fuss was about and just couldn't catch on. Maybe because I didn't care about any of the people? Or possibly because I'm grossed out by the notion of eating bugs. I watched a few episodes of American Idol when a Raleigh contestant was in the finals, but that's about it. I have enough reality in my life -- when I turn on the TV, that's not what I'm looking for.

So imagine my surprise to discover that I am completely and totally sucked into a reality show this season: The Sing-off.

I stumbled onto it a few weeks ago when I was home by myself (translation: in control of the remote and looking for anything to watch other than Two and a Half Men). I started watching because I heart Ben Folds. After two songs, I was hooked.

Finally, a reality show I can enjoy. A capella groups of all shapes, styles and sizes singing and dancing their hearts out in front of judges who are genuinely talented and seem to honestly care about the performers.

If you're not already watching (and come on, admit it, some of you are), then you better start tonight -- it's the next-to-last episode and you WILL be sorry if you miss it.

And my prediction of the group to take it all? Pentatonix.

Here's a sampling why:

...and...

Think I'm wrong? Share your prediction in the comments. The show starts tonight at 8:00 on NBC.
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Friday's 5: Powder Room Remodel

2011-11-18T07:00:00.000-05:00

A year ago this month, we started our big renovation project. Looking back, I'm so glad we did it -- but I'm also a little amazed that we survived it all.

In celebration, I'll be sharing some of my favorite things about our "new" house over the next few Fridays. Today, we'll look at an often overlooked little room: the powder room.

Ours is tucked between the foyer and the family room near the stairs. It's small and has a low-ish ceiling -- but you can see it from the kitchen and we walk past it every time we go to the front door. So even though it's not a big space, it still needs to look great.

Here's what I like best about the room...

1. Magazine rack: Yes, the bathroom doubles as a library -- as if you can honestly say you never read in there. Plus this way I have a storage area for all our catalogs and magazines that isn't my kitchen counter (where these things used to pile up). The brushed nickel finish matches the faucet and ties in with the floor.

2. Pedestal sink: Small enough to fit the space, but still substantial enough to have a presence. So maybe the footstool isn't so classy, but I love the rectangular bowl and squared off base of this sink.

3. Wall color: Because the rest of the downstairs walls are painted in more neutral shades, the red is fun in the tiny room. And it coordinates perfectly with my favorite cover print from The New Yorker magazine.

4. Molding details: Not just crown molding, but molding that accommodates the lower ceiling (because of plumbing from upstairs) and makes it beautiful above the doorway. Only a fabulous finish carpenter would think of such details.

5. Tile floor: We used the same tile from our new hearth, in the adjoining room -- it looks like slate, but is actually tile with tiny mica flecks that make it silvery sparkly. Not so warm on the feet, but it hides every speck of dirt and adds a little flair to a very small space. Also notice the fancy register cover.

What's your favorite touch in your powder room? Or what project are you planning to improve this small but essential room?

Check out the rest of this series...
- Part 2: Dining Room
- Part 3: Family Room

Love Letters

2011-11-17T08:54:00.000-05:00

My dad still uses the mail. You know, the write with a pen on paper U.S. postal service lick the envelope stick on a stamp drop it in the box kind of mail.

It's one of the many things I love about him.

I started getting letters from him when I went away to college -- that was pre-email (ahem) and pre-free-long-distance-on-my-cell-phone (cough) days, so mail was a primary communications tool with my family. But even now, when he's got email, cable phone and texting at his fingertips, I still get the occasional envelope in the mail box from my dad.

More often that not, the envelope contains an odd assortment of newspaper and magazine clippings. Occasionally, one of them is a wedding announcement for someone I knew in high school, although those have become less frequent as I've gotten older. Sometimes it's just something quirky that caught his attention. Or it's something relevant to a part of my life or recent conversation we've had.

The recent pile you see here includes a photo feature about fathers and daughters, an op-ed about Mitt Romney, an op-ed about Art Pope and The New Yorker and a spotlight on a local restaurant owned by my college roommate's family. Always a hodge-podge.

The articles are generally interesting or at least a little trip down memory lane. But what really makes me smile when I get a collection in the mail is knowing that on any given ordinary day, while he's sitting at the table reading the paper and eating his morning bowl of cereal, my dad is thinking about me.

Capture the Everyday: Sign of Fall

2011-11-14T23:11:00.001-05:00

This is from last year. But I love it too much not to share it.

We were walking home from the bus stop and he was just neck deep before I could even stop him. The sheer bliss on his face actually made me forget (for a moment) about the laundry and the bath that would be required later.

Capture the Everyday is about getting you to capture those everyday moments in your life! Each Tuesday, Melissa at Adventuroo will issue a simple challenge to capture something that’s a part of your daily life. You can post just a picture or add some words to go along with it. You’ll have a week to get it done and then she’ll issue another. It’s a quick, easy way to start capturing those little parts of life we sometimes take for granted.

Friday's 5: Trade-Offs

2011-11-10T22:04:00.001-05:00

When Junius was a baby, I thought he would be this tiny, needy, helpless (and adorable, but still exhausting) bump on a log forever. And I was terrified.

I looked at my friends with toddlers and school-aged kids and longed for the day when my child wouldn't be attached to me in such a literal way.

Of course, as it turns out, those early days quickly disappeared. Sometimes I miss the baby days, but I also enjoy the advantages of not having an infant in the house. Now that I've got a 6-year-old and an almost 4-year-old, life looks really different.

But I've been noticing lately that there are good and bad sides to having kids who are getting older and more independent. So for those of you still wandering in the hazy exhaustion of newborn-ness, here are five trade-offs that you have ahead of you.

Reading:
The Good: Now that Junius can read he can better entertain himself and Pippi. He's also better at answering my questions because he has access to a lot more information.
The Bad: Now he can read everything -- including speed limit signs (which may or may not correspond to the speed of my car), event announcements (that I wasn't planning on taking him to) and other less appropriate material. It's like baby-proofing, but different.
Clothing:
The Good: Junius gets himself up every morning and gets dressed before waking us up -- he's our school day alarm clock. And now Pippi is old enough to dress herself, too -- great that the only person I have to dress in the morning is myself.
The Bad: There's no telling what they'll come up with. For Junius, it's probably red gym shorts with a different-shade-of-red t-shirt. For Pippi, well... she could go through as many as four (ahem) unusual selections in one day, usually involving something a) sparkly, b) pink, c) flouncy, d) too big/small or e) all of the above (see photo).
Eating:
The Good: My kids can make their own breakfast now, reach the snacks in the pantry and fix juice out of the fridge -- again, one less chore that falls on my plate.
The Bad: They're making their own food choices sometimes without asking, meaning they're fixing Chex Mix for breakfast or eating the last banana that I needed for smoothies.
Time:
The Good: Because Junius really is our household alarm clock, it's very helpful for him to be able to tell time. It's also nice to tell him that a friend is coming over at 4:00 and have that actually mean something.
The Bad: It's a lot harder to convince him that it's time to go to bed when he can look at the clock and tell that it's only 6:15.
Television:
The Good: So it's probably not our most stellar parenting move, but we've discovered that we can sleep in a little on Saturdays now that the kids are able to work the TV (including the TiVo) on their own. Hey, I still remember sitting in front of the test pattern with my brother on Saturday mornings waiting for cartoons and I turned out okay -- trusting that my kids will, too.
The Bad: If we're not up with them, then they're choosing their own programming -- which is often the Disney channel (and I'm sorry, but I think most of those shows are terrible) or occasionally something less-than-kid-friendly from TiVo.

As they say, the grass is always greener... If you've got a newborn, what older stage are you looking forward to? Or if you've got older kids, what mixed blessing of the future should I be worrying about now?
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Late Night Adventures in Parenting

2011-11-08T07:36:00.000-05:00

"Mommy? There is gooey on my finger."

That sentence is not something I really want to hear at any time of day. But especially not coming from my child at 4 a.m.

So I grab my glasses from the nightstand and fumble my way into the bathroom to find Pippi standing beside the toilet. She's holding her finger up in the air, her pull-up and pajama pants around her ankles.

I grab a tissue, wipe her hand and reach to pull up her pants. And that's when I realize what was on her finger.

Poop.

Somehow, even though she's been waking up dry for weeks, tonight she has slept through pooping in her pull-up and didn't realize it. That is, until she stuck her finger in it.

Ick ick ick.

And yet, somehow she's so sweet about it and appreciative of my help and just happy to have some quality time together in the middle of the night that I can't get mad at her. I wipe her bottom, scrub our hands, find a clean pull-up, get her pajamas back on and carry her to her bed.

As I'm tucking her in, she says, "I love you, Mommy. You are the Best Mommy Ever." Then she smacks my hand with one of her noisy little kisses and grins at me over the edge of her blanket.

Melty hearted, I drag back into my bed, fluff my pillow and settle back in toward sleep.

Except that Pippi isn't done yet. And that's the roller coaster of motherhood. One minute I'm all weak-kneed in love with the girl. The next minute she's wailing for me from the other room and I'm wondering why she hates me so much.

An hour later, we were finally both asleep.

One more hour and we're starting another day. One more crazy ride.

Photo: Self-portrait by Pippi has nothing to do with the story except that I thought it was funny.
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Recipe: Pumpkin Soup

2011-11-07T19:08:00.001-05:00

Full credit for this recipe goes to Ilina at Dirt & Noise.

She was pinning all these great pumpkin recipes last week and I had this pumpkin sitting on my counter from The Produce Box (not the jack o' lantern pictured here, of course -- but I'm still very proud of my first-ever carvings). So I asked her for an easy but tasty recipe recommendation.

Here's what she sent:

Pumpkin Soup

small cooking pumpkin (or substitute butternut squash)
olive oil
1 chopped onion
1 clove minced garlic
2 tablespoons apple sauce
3 cups chicken broth
1 cup pulp free orange juice
splash (or more) dry white wine
pinch cinnamon
1-2 teaspoon paprika
1-2 teaspoon cumin
salt and pepper to taste
1/2 cup cream

Roast pumpkin and cook until soft. Scrape out seeds and reserve pulp. On medium heat, cook onion and garlic in olive oil until slightly browned in a dutch oven. Add apple sauce, chicken broth, orange juice, wine and give it a stir. Turn heat to low. Mix in pumpkin and seasonings. Simmer for at least 20-30 minutes, stirring occasionally. Take off the heat and whisk in the cream. Use an immersion blender or puree it in batches (though this step is not necessary). Serve with bread and garnish with fried onions and cashews.

* * *

It turned out delicious -- plus I'm super impressed with myself for being able to say that I made pumpkin soup from scratch. But I do have a few notes to go along with the recipe.

Not knowing how to roast pumpkin, I googled it and came up with this solution: Preheat oven to 400 degrees F. Place the pumpkin cut side up on a parchment lined baking sheet. Season with 1/2 tsp salt and 1/4 tsp pepper. Turn cut side down and drizzle with 1 tbsp olive oil. Place in oven and roast until skin is golden brown and the pumpkin is tender, 50 to 60 minutes. Remove from the oven and allow to cool.

Next time, I think I'd use less orange juice -- unless maybe I had a bigger pumpkin. Don't skimp on the spices -- they're yummy. I did use my immersion blender because it makes me happy and makes the soup smooth and lovely. And sadly I didn't have any fried onions or cashews in the pantry, so I just crumbled Saltines into my bowl -- the saltiness is a nice balance to the soup flavor.

Junius didn't like it, but Pippi did -- so that makes it a win at our house.

Now go show Ilina some blog love (remember what we talked about on Friday?) and then leave us a link to your favorite pumpkin recipe here in the comments.
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