My Dad is a Fob

Sideseen With the Family!

mdiaf — Mon, 26 Jul 2010 21:49:08 +0000

My dad was telling me over MSN Messenger about our upcoming vacation to China. He highlighted a couple places we would be visiting:

(04:35:42 PM) Dad: We’re going to 桂林 and 黄果树瀑布 (Asia’s biggest fall)
(04:36:19 PM) Dad: There will be a lot of good “sideseen” (I hope I spell it correctly).

He meant “sightseeing” :).

Exercise Coach

mdiaf — Wed, 21 Jul 2010 00:07:40 +0000

Here’s an email from my dad addressed to two 30+ year-old children…

Dearest Aaron and Audrey:

Good to hear from you both. Health is most important. I want you to take good care of yourself.

I have started to eat slowly and spend more time to chew the food to get its flavors. Sit straight and bring the food up to your mouth. Don’t eat too full. Reserve room for fruit after a meal to get the right vitamins.

Next, you want to find time to exercise. Even stretching all your limbs, bending your knees and doing sitting ups slowly are effective. Make an effort every day and do more during the weekends.

Love from Dad

Good Fathers Appreciate Good Daughters

mdiaf — Wed, 14 Jul 2010 06:17:37 +0000

My dad sent me a really sweet and quirky e-mail one day during the first few weeks that I had started grad school away from home, to show me what he appreciated about me. The subject was, “An Ode to those special daughters”:

Good daughters agree with you on the choice of their first vehicle.
Good daughters don’t mind when you mumble your outdated “insights” and philosophy for an hour.
Good daughters let you win the argument no matter how wrong you are.
Good daughters forgive you after you make them upset.
Good daughters make delicious cup cakes.
Good daughters wash the dishes, clean the house and even swipe the hot-tub.
Good daughters never afraid of spiders.
Good daughters play guitar for their dads not minding whether they have enough musical talent to appreciate.
Good daughters study hard and obtain high GPA.
Good daughters share their facebook.
Good daughters are good and save drivers on the road.
Good daughters are so flexible, they do restaurant, retail and medicine.
Good daughters always call back no matter how busy they are.
Good daughters always present themselves beautifully even their rooms are messy behind closed doors.
Good daughters can survive bed bugs and share rooms with others for years.
Good daughters seek advice from you even on their romantic relationships.
Good daughters manage wisely their spending.
Good daughters get away from trouble and leave you no worry.
Good daughters know it’s all right to screw up, but just pick yourselves up and keep going.
Good daughters make wise choice on their schools, their friends and their careers.
Good daughters have dreams and know how to reach them.
Good daughters walk closely with God.

Praise God, I HAVE A REALLY GOOD DAUGHTER.

My Life is Jused

mdiaf — Fri, 09 Jul 2010 21:37:32 +0000

My friend’s dad is the owner of a Juice It Up! He made the front cover of the menu…

A Spicy Remedy

mdiaf — Thu, 08 Jul 2010 01:33:25 +0000

My dad posted this on his facebook after his team Argentina lost to Germany in the world cup this year:

“It has not been a very good day for me, first my favourite soccer team lost in a humiliating way, and then my daughters soccer team in ohio lost the first two games. to over come my sadness i had alot of tabasco sauce.”

Passive Aggressive Pink Note FTW

mdiaf — Thu, 08 Jul 2010 01:29:13 +0000

My neighbors have 5 Pomeranians that never shut up, so one day, my dad got fed up. I came home to find our fence beautifully decorated with: “NO BARKING DOGS ALLOWED” with the bright pink paint leftover from my room. I found it funny that there was a “beware of dog” sign next to it. :)

Subject: It’s a Boy!!!!

mdiaf — Fri, 02 Jul 2010 19:38:48 +0000

A great exchange between my pregnant sister in law, fob father in law and my wife…

Pregnant sister in law: Just had perinatologist appt. It’s definitely a boy! Brain, heart, kidneys, spine, arms, legs are all normal!
Dad: Oh, Boy! Have you decided his name yet? Email us the picture, mom and I like to see the little “extra piece”
My wife: I’m actually a bit disturbed…
Pregnant sister in law: Very weird comment from him, as usual…

Loudy Disturbing Neighbors

mdiaf — Mon, 28 Jun 2010 04:03:23 +0000

My best friend and I were rooming together for a Church retreat. Upon returning to our dorm, we found that my dad had slipped a note underneath our door reminding us to be more considerate of our neighbors. He definitely put a lot of thought into this. Unfortunately, the thoughtful letter reminding us to keep down the “noise and giggle” only spurred more “noise and giggle.”

Dear Literate Dog,

mdiaf — Mon, 21 Jun 2010 00:56:47 +0000

My dad and dog have a hate-hate relationship; he’s the only person she barks at. My dad has been trying to get her to stay downstairs during the day to minimize accidents. I came home to this sign. I asked him why he wrote a sign and he just said it works…

World Cup : Beauty Pageant :: Soccer Player : ?

mdiaf — Mon, 14 Jun 2010 19:42:26 +0000

The other day, my dad and I were watching the England vs. USA World Cup match. We were discussing their jerseys, and this is what he said.

Dad: I don’t like the America shirts.
Me: Aw, but I like their jerseys.
Dad: I don’t. They look like American pigeon.
Me:…Pigeons?
Dad: Yeah. Stripe make them look like Mrs. Oklahoma. MISS AMERICA!!!! Like that.

Turns out he meant pageants.