My Hope Fulfilled

The Craft Room That Turned Into A Cabinet

2012-02-01T23:48:00.000-05:00

Wow, the weather was beautiful here today!! Yes, it was February 1, and I was outside, barefoot, in short sleeves, spray painting. Perfection.

We recently moved into a tiny two bedroom apartment. I used to have five bedrooms in an 1800 square foot house, so I had one large sized bedroom devoted solely to crafts/office space.

In our new, much smaller, yet closer to everything, and cheaper house, the living room now has five functions: living room, play room, music room, office, craft room. I'm super grateful for our affordable housing, but I really hate the look of so many pieces of furniture crammed into one space and pushed up against walls. And there is just really no way around clutter. I'm fighting the battle, but losing.

After we got settled in and I realized that I needed some craft storage in the living room, but had no money to spend. Within a week, I found this beaut on the side of the road! (It's the cabinet squeezed between the desk and the armoire, behind the little Elmo lover.) Don't you just love its plum color?

Not.

So country, so horrible.

But so incredibly freeeeeee!

Today, my little craft corner got a makeover!! For $8 I picked up two cans of Krylon Satin Ivory spray paint (although I probably should have had three cans). The sun came out and I hauled this road side piece of country junk out to the patio.

I used the method of spraying that my Mama taught me - short and quick strokes, several thin layers. I did 3.5 layers, but honestly should have done 4. This is after the first coat, obviously before I got my groove going.

The simple wooden knobs were given two coats of oil rubbed bronze spray paint. I love the way they glisten in the sun - too bad my cave of a house doesn't get sunshine like this!

After the paint dried, I scuffed up the edges, and some of the plum showed through. Not exactly what i was going for, but I kind of like it!

I think I'd like to replace the o.r.b. knobs with some teal glass or ceramic ones from Hobby Lobby. I didn't paint the interior part of the open section because I'd like to put contact paper on the back and sides.

One of the benefits of the craft cabinet being squeezed in between two other pieces of (major) furniture is that even though I ran out of spray paint, who cares! I conserved the majority of the paint for the front and tops that are actually visable. If we ever move and this piece of furniture is more prominent, I will just grab another can of spray paint and touch it up. Can you see how the bottom half of the side could use another coat or two?

Levi loves getting in this cabinet, so I invested in some really high end baby-proofing.

And here are some gratuitous shots of the inside of my craft cabinet.

The drawer - tools, vinyl, cricut cartridges

The bottom - ribbon, stamps, stickers, etc

I attached a 3M hook to the left side of the cabinet to hang extra wreath forms and other things that don't fit inside the cabinet that can be hung, like my quilter's cutting mat and plastic guide (what are they really called, mom?).

And that's the story of how I shrunk all my crafts from a bedroom space to a cabinet.

Well, let's be fair, some of my fabric and sewing notions live on top of the TV cabinet. See, I told you, clutter everywhere! Boy, this looks way worse in the picture than it feel in real life.

Oh, and notice the parson desk chair? I think I promised you the 25 part saga - let's get to that this week, mmmkay?

The Anthro (Mug) Inspired Wreath

2012-02-01T23:36:00.000-05:00

Oh, so many stereotypical blogger things on that title. Have you seen this video?

The back story here is that Jess gave me a mug from Anthropology with an S on it. It was Aqua and Red, and you know I love that color combo. Then I picked up a few of them for Christmas gifts; one of them being a B for Becker.

I am so in love with these mugs.

Apparently so is Hollywood. Look, the M mug debuted on ABC last week in the hands of Snow White on Once Upon A Time. (I also spotted this monogrammed mug on Snow's nightstand a few episodes back.)

Image Source

Anyway, as much as I really loved my S mug, and the M that Melody gifted me, the color combo of the B mug was just so striking to me. Teal and mustard. A total win.

When craft night with Jess came along, I picked up some mug inspired teal yarn from the Dollar Tree. Did you know you could get yarn for $1? I also found a small straw wreath form that I got from Salvation Army for $0.50.

Lucky for me, Jess had mustard colored startched felt on hand - and so graciously let me hack away at it. I wrapped the straw wreath form in teal yarn (this step takes forever, by the way). I used the felt to create startched flowers and rosettes, using the tutorials linked below.

Startched Flower Tutorial

Rolled Flower Tutorial

My only issue now is the wreath is a bit petite to be hanging on a door. I'm not sure where to hang it. Any suggestions?

Ships Passing in the Night...and Day...

2012-01-29T22:17:00.002-05:00

Remember the days when the weekend meant you got to spend 48 hours of uninterrupted time together - watching TV, going out to eat, wearing pjs till noon?

Now, I'd just settle for 48 minutes!

That new job I have, although wildly wonderful, helpful, and actually kind of fun, is robbing me of all my Herb time. I would say it's affecting my marriage, but honestly, I haven't seen Herb enough in the last week to know if it is or not.

Ideally, it seemed like we'd have a few hours after my shift to still spend together, but we're both so tired from having jobs and then playing single parent while the other one is at work, that any conversation beyond, "How was your day," is just too physically taxing.

This weekend was especially bad. Herb was doing work at church all day Saturday, and then in between church and his Sunday night radio shift, I took a lunch shift at the restaurant. All told, I saw Herb for maybe 2 hours of awake time in the last 48.

I know this is probably coming off as very complainy. But what I'm hoping, no praying, is that this is the stuff that lifelong marriages are made out of. This is the season of our life that makes us better teammates, companions, lovers, and parents in the end. This is one of those trials that makes the future that much sweeter.

Am I being idealistic?

I keep reminding myself this is only a season, this is only a season, this is only a season. And I'm trying to limit the "I miss my husband" meltdowns to one a week, and preferably not at work in front of people I hardly know, which may have happened yesterday.

In the meantime, I'm just really grateful I don't work EVERY night, Herb doesn't have to install new speakers at church every weekend, and my son is so clever and smart and loveable, making all of this totally worth it.

Last Night At Dinner

2012-01-27T10:17:00.000-05:00

Random things from dinner last night. It's one of the few times in the day when Levi has both mine and Herb's full attention, and it's at this time when he usually does his best tricks.

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Herb and I talk about expanding our family, but that's where it ends for now, just talking. In the meantime, Levi has explored the idea of being an only child.

Case in point: He has been practicing giving himself high fives and pounding his own fists.

[Video Here]

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After making the Solo Pound It Video, Levi was sitting in this ridiculously cheesy pose. He's practicing for his school pictures.

Have a great weekend!

Aqua - Red Loving

2012-01-25T13:01:00.000-05:00

Recently, I whipped up a couple of these Little Guy ties. I got the pattern from etsy, and the fabric from one of Herb's old dress shirts. I made one for Levi, Roman, and Liam. I just wish I could have the three of them together for a matching picture! Unfortunately, Liam and Roman live in Hawaii. That's okay though, matching ties on our boys somehow makes me feel a little closer to Lauren!

Anyway, I made Levi the aqua tie and then realized I didn't actually have a shirt to match it. I went out on a limb and tried it with the red striped Christmas shirt, and I loved it! Here is Levi posing with the coordinating aqua and red Roman shade in our kitchen. I think I'm on an aqua and red kick.

I know the jury is still out for some people. This color combo may not be your cup of tea, and that's okay! But, in my defense, even Target is recognizing it's awesomeness. Check out this chevron dish towel! The dish dowel and coordinating pasta were a gift from Jess - doesn't she know me so well? I just wish that I had the aqua pasta for my wedding. My little color-loving heart is just going to explode when I serve it up with a side of red sauce.

So, there you have it. I just wrote an entire post about loving my favorite color, aqua, and it's accent friend, red.

And speaking of loving aqua, recently I found a couple blogs devoted just to the color aqua. I am so angry I didn't think of creating this myself!

House of Turquoise - http://www.houseofturquoise.com/

Everything Turquoise - http://www.everythingturquoise.com/

What's your favorite color combo?

Patience At Target Pays Off Again!

2012-01-24T12:45:00.003-05:00

Target deals strike again. Try not to be too jealous though, because these are all items I refrained from buying Levi in the last few months. Even though they were adorable and reasonably priced, I knew I would be happier if I waited till they went on clearance. There are sizable 70% off racks at my local Target this week.

I'm especially excited for the 4 pc Christmas outfit - $26, down to $7.80. I bought it in a 3t - hopefully that was a good guess for next year. If not, we'll be having some snazzy fall church clothes.

The corduroy pants and stripped thermal tee are also buy-aheads - a 5t and 3t. I know, even if I fight it with all my might, Levi will grow into those sizes some day!

The little rocker jammies were originally $9, marked down to $2.68, and on the Target website, you can print off a coupon for 20% off a J.O.Y. children's apparel item. Double score!

So to recap, successful Target shopping has three parts:

1. Wait for things to go on clearance.

Patience, patience, patience.

2. Buy ahead for future seasons.

3. Match coupons with clearance items.

Also, I get weekly emails from Money Saving Mom about great Target Deals.

And no, I am not paid or perked by Target to shop there and blog about it, but seriously, this one-income mom wouldn't survive without it, and it breaks my heart to see other people wasting money on full price things!

Hope

2012-01-24T08:17:00.000-05:00

[Image Source]

Bear with me, I'm processing the simple word hope.

For the first time, this morning I realized that hope has two connotations. Most of the time when I use the word, I'm referring to something I "hope will happen."

I hope I will find a husband.
I hope we can adopt a baby.
I hope Isaac will get healed.
I hope we can move.
I hope we get good tenants in our house.

These hopes aren't guaranteed to have the positive outcome, and in fact, some of them have not.

I remember one time at a funeral, my mom was upset because the pastor kept saying, "We have a hope..." She was frustrated because she had more than hope that Fred was in heaven. She knew him well, knew he trusted and followed Jesus, and felt he already had assurance that he would be spending eternity in heaven.

But maybe that pastor wasn't saying "we hope Fred is in heaven." Maybe he was using the second connotation of the word hope.

Ephesians 1:18 says, "I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you..."

This verse addresses the hope that is assurance of the work Jesus has already done. It says we can KNOW the hope. Jesus has already conquered death, providing a way to eternal life for those who believe in him. Who put their hope in him.

So the eternal hope we have isn't that "I hope I get to go to heaven when I die," no, that I am assured of because I have trusted Jesus with my life. But rather,

"Life totally sucks sometimes, but there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I have a hope to look forward to; eternity in heaven with Jesus."

Isaac's word was hope. Often times I thought it just referred to hoping he would get better or hoping his sickness and death wasn't all in vain, that it served a bigger purpose. Now I think that Isaac must have also had the other version of hope in his head. He knew he may or may not be healed, but regardless, his hope was in the fact that either way, at the end of his life he would be running on golden streets, taking a 200 year tour of the world, and meeting Jesus face to face. And I think he was pretty excited about that.

Because Jesus has granted my eternal hope, how can I not trust him with my worldly ones? He knows me best - he created me, he chose me - what have I to fear?

And that is the ultimate hope fulfilled.

So am I way off here? I'd love to hear some feedback about hope - did you ever realize we use the word in two different ways?

His Daddy's Eyes

2012-01-18T18:05:00.000-05:00

This week I went to a mommy group for the first time at a local church - what fun! Ironically, I knew more faces there than Melody, a regular, who had invited me along! Leave it to being back in Lancaster County and the good old Mennonite game.

That being said, I ran into an acquaintance from college who I hadn't seen or talked to in 6 years, and she obviously had not heard our adoption story. Upon meeting Levi, she remarked,

"Oh my goodness what a cutie! Does he have his daddy's eyes, or what?!"

Um, no, actually he doesn't. Thanks anyway. But I couldn't bring myself to correct her in front of all those people; that would have not helped anyone. Instead, I politely thanked her and commented on her cutie of a baby.

Later, Melody and I chuckled about the awkwardness of that comment. Melody told me that as crazy as it is, she knows several adoptive families where the children and parents' features favor each other. And truly, it's not the first time someone has said Levi looks like Herb or I. A time or two I have heard,

"Man, if I didn't know Levi was adopted, I would have thought he was yours."

To which, if I'm feeling soap-boxy, I reply,

"He is ours."

And then they usually correct themselves and say,

"I mean, he looks just like you/Herb."

Herb's aunt sent me some old pictures out of the blue this week, and if you look at Herb and Levi side by side at the same age, yes, I think I do see some similarities. What a coincidence!

Herb, Levi, Herb

Coming full circle, as Melody and I talked about God, adoption, and grace, we realized, just as we're adopted by God, isn't our goal to look more and more like him? I hope as people get to know me they say,

"Wow, she really has her Father's hands/ eyes/ heart."

The Couch Jump

2012-01-16T23:49:00.003-05:00

This little stunt made us say, "Yup, he's a boy."

**No babies were persuaded to participate or harmed in the making of this video.**

(If the embedded video doesn't work, check out The Couch Jump video here.)

Chosen

2012-01-16T10:04:00.001-05:00

In the weeks and months before my two biggest life events - marriage and motherhood - I prayed that God would use these life-changers to teach me more about Him and His character. In marriage, He has given me an amazingly loving, generous, sacrificial husband who is doing his best to follow Jesus' example. Because I know Herb is seeking God's will for our family, I know I can trust his leadership, the way the church clings to Jesus. As a mother, God is showing me that the unconditional love I have for Levi doesn't even compare to the unconditional love God has for me. God is teaching me that love is the foundation for discipline.

One learning opportunity I never previously considered, though probably obvious to everyone else, was the testimony that our adoption story would give as a real life example of God's adoption of us. I know I've touched on it before; it really hit home the day the Levi's birth certificate arrived in the mail. Now as I'm reading through Ephesians as part of the Good Morning Girls Bible study, Levi's adoption and my spiritual adoption are really on my mind again!

Ephesians 1:3-6
Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing in Christ. For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight. In love he predestined us to be adopted as his sons through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will - to the praise of his glorious grace, which he has freely given us in the One he loves.

(Underlining added by me.)

It makes me think about how we chose to adopt before Levi was even conceived. When Levi was created, God knew he would be our son. It reminds me that in the same way Levi's name has been changed (even to the extent of his birth certificate and the fact that as far as legality is concerned, the person under his former name has never existed), my life before Jesus is gone too - I am a new creation!

I can see His hands so clearly orchestrating the construction of our family - how can I do anything else but trust Him with every other detail of my life? And I'm so thankful that God has taken the time to give me real life, living, breathing, loving examples, in Herb and Levi, of His incredible love for me.

My Proverbial Tentmaking

2012-01-14T23:35:00.002-05:00

If you think this is goign to be a post about how to DIY a tent, then you're wrong. But it's a good guess!

I had to get a job this week. But my work options were pretty limited, as in I could only work after 5 pm, when Herb gets home from work. Of course I'd love to get more piano/clarinet/guitar students, but until more come along, waitressing was pretty much my only other option.

I applied for a couple of jobs on New Years Eve, but the job I really wanted was at our favorite restaurant here in town. Coincidently, earlier that day a server position at said restaurant became open! One thing led to another, I was hired, and I started on Tuesday.The people were incredibly friendly, helpful, and nice. The food and beer is so delicious that I want to tell everyone in the world to eat there. The food is priced at a point that makes a server's tips quite nice. And it is precisely one mile from my house. Awesome, awesome, awesome, and awesome.

God had provided a job within days of deciding I needed one and a way for Herb to be home in time to watch Levi so I could get to work.

And yet I was still feeling sorry for myself.

Tuesday night after my shift, I walked in the door, kicked off my shoes, threw my balled up apron on the stairs, and began my pity party. Tears were welling in my eyes, my pockets were empty (since I was just training), feet were aching (when was the last time I literally didn't sit for 5 hours?), I was smelling restauranty, and feeling like I had toilet germs everywhere. Herb was here hanging out with our pastor, and when they asked me how work was, the sobs poured out.

I can see now it was totally my pride, but all I could say was, "I practically have a master's degree, and here I am cleaning toilets?! This is so not fair."

And Dennis, bless his heart, had just the right encouragement. He reminded me that by making this career sacrifice I am blessed to be able to be with Levi all day. He commended Herb and I for "sticking it out" and figuring out ways to take care of Levi and our financial obligations. Sure I could go back to teaching, but then I would lose all those precious moments.

He pointed out that in the New Testament, Paul "labored over tent making as not to be a burden" to anyone he was ministering to. (1 Thessalonians 2:9)

Waiting tables, serving food, and cleaning toilets at the end of the night is my proverbial tent making. This part time job enables me to maintaining my "daytime ministry" in motherhood. Which is seriously my favorite thing ever.

I am so thankful for my little boy, and the time we get to spend together. I am so happy that Herb is willing to make sacrifices so I can stay home with Levi, and even after working three jobs, is still willing to spend quality time with Levi in the evening while I work. I am delighted that God pretty much dropped a great job into my lap.

And I'm really grateful for Dennis inspiring my new "tent making perspective."

What tents are you making?

I Love the Number 12: January

2012-01-12T22:40:00.000-05:00

I love the number twelve. I'm not superstitious, but whenever I play any number guessing game, I always pick the number twelve. (Sometimes I even win.) I was really, quite dorkily, excited about this year being 2012. In honor of the year of 12, I am going to do a monthly series on all the reasons 12 is special to me and all the things it represents.

There are plenty of weird idiosyncratic things I have concerning the number, but for now, I'll address today's date.

January 12

The year was 2004. It was the first day of my fourth semester of college. It was a Monday.

It was the day Herb and I became "us."

You can read the whole story of January 12, 2004 right here (or check out the entire love story from the beginning, here).

Though this is no new content, today, January 12, is an awesome reminder of the last eight years and the blessing that Herb is in my life. He is my best friend, my favorite musician, my supporter and helper, the coolest person in the world, and the love of my life! I am so thankful for January 12.

Happy January 12th to you!

31 and still so fun

2012-01-09T23:28:00.000-05:00

Today my dear Herb turned 31. That's 31 more years than predicted!

No, but seriously, every year on his birthday I'm reminded what a gift his life is, and what a privileged it is that he choose ME to spend it with!

The PA Farm Show always falls around the time of his birthday. Two years ago we went on a Saturday, his 29th birthday. Deep in the throws of {impatiently} waiting for a baby, we were especially in tune to all the strollers around us and hoped that next year we could bring our own baby to the farm show.

2010 Farm Show

Last year, we did indeed have our own little baby to bring to the farm show, but at 5 months old, Levi wasn't all that into it. But he was still cute in his bibs! Last year we said, "Oh next year the farm show will be so much more fun with a one year old!"

2011 Farm Show

And we were right. Levi was full of words like duck, chicken, and cow. He liked getting on the goose's eye level, but wasn't so sure about petting a huge horse. He sucked down half of my maple frozen yogurt and an order of chicken nuggets.

It's also my sister in law, Jocelyn's birthday. For all the years that we were friends, I could never remember her exact birth date, so conveniently, I found a husband who has the same birthday so I can always remember it.

My brother and niece at the farm show. Joelle is saying "cheese."

Not sure why Herb loves the farm show so much (you know, cause we are soooo farmy with our yard that we don't even mow oursevles), but it's a fun birthday tradition and something to look forward too after the holidays.

I love you, Herb! Happy birthday.

(Don't worry, I saved all the super cheesy lovey stuff for his card.)

We Have {No} Explaining To Do

2012-01-07T21:48:00.001-05:00

So often I feel like I try to squeeze open adoption relationships into a framework of something else - something more explainable, more common. Step family relationships, extended family, family friend, etc. But really it's none of those things.

Open adoption is completely its own unique amazing experience.

Levi's sister, Savannah, demonstrates this perfectly. She often calls Levi her little brother or baby brother, which he is. When she helps him during dinner, protects him from a fall, teaches him things like screaming and hide and seek, or hugs his guts out, I can see that she definitely gets the brother-sister thing! She is an awesome big sister.

But then with her next breath, rather than baby brother, she'll refer to him as "your baby."

I love the way that in her precious, innocent mind this needs no explaining. He is my little baby; he is her baby brother.

And that's just the way it is.

The Baby Monster

2012-01-06T14:23:00.001-05:00

Jess's post about the Green Monster was PERFECT timing today, because I've been meaning to write about my version, the Baby Monster.

To catch up, basically The Green Monster is this amazingly delicious and super healthy smoothie created by a really healthy runner over at Oh She Glows. I learned about these powerful energy packing smoothies from my friend Samantha. When I started making them for myself, my simple recipe went like this:

Michelle's Green Monster

2 Handfuls of Fresh Spinach (sometimes I use frozen, too)
8oz skim or coconut milk
3 ice cubes
1 banana
1 tbsp flax seed
1 tsp peanut butter
1 tsp vanilla

And I drink one several times a week - the only reason I don't do it every day is that I can't seem to keep enough spinach and bananas on hand!

Anyway, a few months ago, when Levi saw me drinking one, he got jealous. Well of course I jumped on the opportunity to make one for him - can you just imagine getting all those good things in a little baby!!

The main adaption I had to make was skim to whole milk and dropping out the peanut butter for my then under one year old.

The Baby Monster

1-2 Handfuls of Fresh Spinach

6-8oz whole milk

1 ice cube

1 banana

5 tbsp baby cereal (flavored is good, too) - wheat, rice, oatmeal, etc

1 tsp vanilla

And just like Jess promised, you really cannot taste the spinach! Now that Levi is older and we have established that there is no peanut allergy, I also throw in about 1 tsp of peanut butter into his smoothie.

As you can see, he LOOOOOVES it. Now, if I could just get Herb to eat them, too!

Fighting Fear, Testing Vows, and a Lullabye

2012-01-03T21:20:00.000-05:00

Yesterday was a rough one. Herb woke up with some concerns about his kidney. I started the day feeling like it was no big deal - we have been there and done that. But soon the weight of what-could-be was heavy. Just because this is old hat doesn't mean it's welcome hat.

For the majority of the day, I was absent. Sure, I was there with Levi, we were at home together all day, but I wasn't really THERE. My mind was in a hospital room sitting reliving walking beside someone through dialysis. It traveled to dark places that test the part of our marriage vows that I cried through at our wedding. When I said "in sickness and in health," I knew the reality of "in sickness." But we have been so fortunate to be "in health" for 6 years. I started thinking about "for richer or poorer." Knowing how "poor" we are now, what would happen if Herb got too sick to work? Well, poorer, I guess. And last night we went though medical ordeals, it was just the two of us - how in the world would we handle hospital visits and whatnot as a family of three?

The irony is in the middle of the night phone call I had with my dear friend Lauren two nights ago. Her brand spankin' new baby has been in the NICU, learning how to breath on his own. Covered in prayer and trusting in God's sovereignty, Lauren has no fear. Fear is so useless - what will be will be, and at the end of the day God is still bigger than everything else and still on His throne.

And there I was, just mere hours later, fighting a raging battle with fear itself.

It will not win.

Praise God, the bloodwork and testing he had done today are coming back clear for my dear Herb; probably just a little hiccup on the post-transplant road.

And in the meantime, I will put on my big girl panties. The result of my mental absence yesterday lead to way too many falls, cuts, scrapes, and goose eggs. In fact, poor little Levi may or may not have a bruise on his forehead that looks like he is sprouting a unicorn horn. {I don't want to talk about it, I'm embarrassed.}

Finally, as yesterday drew to a close, and I rocked my little goose egg baby to sleep, a lullaby came to mind. I loved to dream about singing this lullaby to my future baby, but now that I think of it, I don't know if I ever actually remembered to sing it to him. How timely that God laid this tune on my heart last night - last night it was my promise and apology to Levi, but it also served as a reminder to me from my Papa.

JJ Heller - Keep You Safe (listen here)

Quiet your heart, it's just a dream, go back to sleep

I'll be right here, I'll stay awake as long as you need me

To slay all the dragons and keep out the monsters, I'm watching over you

My love is a light driving away all of your fear

So don't be afraid, remember I made a promise to keep you safe

You'll have your own battles to fight when you are older

You'll find yourself frozen inside, but always remember

If you feel alone, facing the giants, and you don't know what to do

My love is a light driving away all of your fear

So don't be afraid, remember I made a promise to keep you safe

2011 Countdown

2011-12-29T21:09:00.003-05:00

The presents are organzied, the tree is packed away, and the ball is ready to drop. You know what that means, right? New Year's Reflection Time!! I'll be back before the end of the year to do an actual year in review kind of reflection.

In the meantime, my stats tell me that these are the top 10 posts written in 2011 that were the most visited. I guess scientifically it's unfair to the posts that were written later in the year, but oh well.

10. New Year's Revelation

Part 5 in the saga of Herb and Michelle; it was this time of year 8 years ago that we made it official.
{If there were a soundtrack to the story, this song would be on it.}

9. Finally Finale

The day my son almost didn't get named on the stand because I was crying too hard.

8. Super Cheap Diapers

My secret weapon? Amazon Mom!

7. My Son't First Mom

The closer we become, the more real it is.

6. Birthday Pennant Banner

The first project in my Necessarily Creative gifts line - a birthday banner for Levi.

5. Sideline Guy

Cue the "Romeo and Juliet" theme, Chapter 1 of our story was about love at first sight.

4. Don't Judge Me

Cupcakes, pool baths, and naked baby dancing...

3. Jen's Story

Levi's birthmom, Jen, shares her side of the story.

2. Fall Wreath Under $5

In all fairness, the only reason this wreath got so many hits is because I linked up to Nester's wreath link party. It has also been pinned by four people I don't know in real life. This is the big time folks. Ha ha!

1. The Groveling Fool Says Thanks

I'm glad this is the number one read post this year. If I learned anything this year, it is about how amazing open adoption can be, but how we really both have to work at the relationship. When I wrote this post, Jen and I hadn't actually spent any time together yet, and had merely exchanged letters. Looking back on the 2011, Jen's friendship is one of the things for which I am most thankful.

And if that doesn't accurately sum up my year of blogging, maybe this will...

Merry Christmas!!

2011-12-25T08:00:00.000-05:00

We are celebrating Griswold style and are having several days of relaxing, family loving, food munching, movie watching, nothingness.

It is awesome.

Peppermint Streamers:Lightest Turquoise Ornament Cards
Check out our collection of Christmas cards and holiday cards.

Christmas Cards, Vol 2: The Outtakes

2011-12-24T01:15:00.000-05:00

My friends Joan and Jon are notorious for having amazingly awesome and hilarious Christmas cards. Do yourself a favor and check them out...

2011

2010 & 2009

After I blogged about my free Christmas cards from Tinyprints, Joan emailed me to volunteer her hubby/photographer extraordinaire to take our Christmas pictures. Armed with a great photographer, magnificent assistant, and a camera that pretty much would cost a year's salary, where do you think we took the pictures? Here of all places (I can't even bring myself to actually write the word.)

Joan, the brains behind the plan, suggested that Levi could eat a cookie (in focus), while Herb (dressed in a Santa hat) and I kissed by a tree (out of focus). To set it up, Levi was standing in a cart, we kissed by the tree. We couldn't stop gigglin (I guess PDA isn't our thing), and it was almost impossible to capture Levi eating a cookie while Herb and I were kissing, no customers were trying to get by, and all the stars were aligned.

This was as close as we got.

In the meantime, Jon and Joan managed to capture several other adorable pictures of my kiddo!

Check back tomorrow to see the final product...

The Necessarily Creative Christmas: The Fishy Purse

2011-12-15T11:27:00.000-05:00

Last week, I began sharing my homemade Christmas gifts with you. I'm calling it the Necessarily Creative Christmas line because my creativity comes out of financial necessity. Well, and the fact that I just looooove a good craft.

One of my absolutely favorite new websites is called Make It Love It. She does all kinds of amazing sewing projects which are usually way out of my league (I can hardly sew a straight line). But when she posted a tutorial for a fabric fishy purse, somehow I mustered up the courage to give it a go. And I'm so glad I did. This project was incredibly fun, rewarding, and actually pretty cheap, too!

My nieces, Ellie and Cora, love animals, especially fish. Some of my favorite memories with the girls have happened at the Baltimore Aquarium and Pittsburgh Zoo, not to mention all the beach trips we've taken together! Their daddy (Herb's brother) is somewhat of a fish aficionado, too, and they have a 6 foot tank in their house. And since they are little girls, I'm hoping they will appreciate having a cute purse. I wanted their purses to be similar, but a little unique to each girl, too. Cora LOVES anything yellow, and Ellie is more inclined to pink.

I'm not going to reinvent the wheel and write down the directions, because they are all right here. All you need is a variety of fabrics (less than a yard, total, and you can probably use up a lot of scraps), 1/2 yard of fusible interfacing, 2 buttons, thread, a needle, a scissors, and a sewing machine. Oh, and a lot of free time. I am guessing I spent about 10 hours to make two purses. But again, I have a toddler who sleeps a lot and a husband who works three jobs.

Oh, and did I mention how amazingly detailed the tutorial is?

Here's what the purses look like all stretched out.

And here they are ready to swim in the ocean.

Now, please excuse me, I need to go find all kinds of fish accessories (crackers, stickers, candy) to put in their purses so they are ready to go to the aquarium!!

Still Getting Chills

2011-12-15T00:35:00.000-05:00

Today I had lunch with a friend from college, who unlike everyone else on the face of the plant, is not a facebook user. We haven't seen each other in several years, but randomly ran into each other a few weeks ago at the farm show. Now both stay at home moms and living in the same community, a play date was in order!

Other than missing out on hours of wasted time, Becca had also missed the entire fertility-adoption saga. She knew we adopted Levi because for whatever reason, it was the FIRST thing I told her when we saw each other at the farm show.

"You have a baby!"
"Yeah, he's ADOPTED!"

Herb claims I actually shouted it.

Anyway, she wanted to hear the whole story, and believe me, I gave her the long version. It was crazy awesome to get to tell the complete story to someone who had no idea what was going to come next. And you know how much I love a captive audience! From no nut-sack needle to incredibly specific answered prayers. From finding out about Levi's birth on facebook to our awesome relationship with Levi's first family. She was literally sitting on the edge of her seat the entire time.

Dang, I guess it is a pretty good story.

My son is 16 months old, and the story still gives me chills. Just last month we spoke at a fundraiser for Bethany Christian Services, and I ugly cried through my speech during rehearsal (thankfully, I got it out then and held it together during the banquet). And then last night when we were at a Christmas party for our adoption agency and I kept getting choked up just thinking about how important those people were to me. Then they called up all the kids who had finalized adoptions in the past year to place an ornament on the Christmas tree. Afterward, Herb thought I was taking Levi outside to run around after he hung his ornament, but I actually went out in the hall and cried.

God is so good. I hope our story keeps me in awe for the rest of my life.

Awkward Hugger

2011-12-13T21:42:00.002-05:00

A little secret, if you don't know me in real life, is that I am an incredibly awkward hugger. I usually love hugs from people, but you will almost NEVER find me initiating a hug. It is way out of my comfort zone.

The reason I say I usually love hugs, is because of what happened in college. It was the first time I realized I wasn't a "hugger." Lauren always greeted me with an 8:00am hug. I tolerated the hugs for a while, but soon I found myself annoyed, Lauren got the drift, and I found the courage to say I didn't really want a hug first thing in the morning. We compromised by creating "free hug" time after 11:00 am.

About five years later, my hugging aversion surfaced again, but this time, the tables had kind of turned. I found myself missing a hug. Jess's husband, Isaac, passed away, and although we spent the whole evening together, never once did I hug her. Maybe it was the fact that if we hugged we knew we would have both lost it, but I think it had more to do with the fact that neither one of us are inclined to hugging, so it just didn't happen.

Not hugging Jess on the day her husband died has stuck with me. I know she's not holding it against me or anything, but I feel like it was a pretty pathetic move on my part.

But I'm turning over a new leaf. I decided I want to be quicker with an embrace, but it's so out of my comfort zone! Since we changed churches and moved counties, I feel like I have a "fresh start" and I'm trying to reinvent myself as a hugger.

It is definitely stretching me. I'm doing pretty good with hello and goodbye hugs, especially when it comes to people I don't get to see as often anymore (like Jess, ironically).

But two weeks ago, I did something really really awkward. More awkward than a non-hugger trying to initiate the embraces.

I met my friend D for coffee. I knew she was pregnant, but when she arrived and I saw how round and adorable her belly was, I instinctively patted it (because all pregant women LOVE that, right?). Unfortunately for D, next came a hug and somehow in the hug process, I forgot to move my hand away from her belly, and as we embraced, suddenly I realized my hand had gone from belly to lower back, and was in between her shirt and coat.

And suddenly, instead of a "hey, good to see you" kind of hug, she got a "hey, this is way more inimate and personal than I meant it to be" kind of hug.

The worst part is, the next week, I ran into ANOTHER pregnant friend and did the exact.same.thing.

The moral of the story is, if you're pregant, don't let me hug you. Lauren, you should be grateful there is an ocean separating your pregnant self from my awkward self.

The Necessarily Creative Christmas: Framed Quote

2011-12-05T09:58:00.001-05:00

This Christmas has definitely been a lesson in necessity inspiring creativity (how does that quote go?). Money we have not, but time and abilities are a-plenty this year. I have been crafting up a storm, but I can't reveal everything just yet, I wouldn't want to ruin any surprises!

Today I'll show you my first installment of The Necessarily Creative Christmas Line. (Nice title, huh?)

The quote comes from Proverbs 23:7, but it was also sentimental to the gift recipient. Christina is a wonderful lady I met during college who just turned 30. In college, this verse was inscribed in the lobby of the building where music majors spent every second of every day for four years.

To make it, I used one of the black 6x8 floating frames I got for a song on Black Friday. I cut the letters out using Sure Cuts a Lot and black vinyl (like I did for this wall quote). I love the simplicity of the black on the see-through frame, and the way the letter cast a shadow on the wall.

(Sorry the pictures are awful - can't find my camera, so cell phone will do!)

In the comments, would you share with me your favorite gift ever received that was hand made?

Two Truths and a Lie

2011-12-03T01:11:00.001-05:00

Did you ever play this game in high school as an ice breaker at peer mediation club? No? Just me?

Anyway, here's how it works. I am going to tell you three statements about my evening - which ended up being pretty rough. Two of them are completely true, one of them is only kind of true, therefore making it a lie.

In no particular order, here they are... can you find the lie?

When I was cleaning up Levi's explosive diaper and putting him in the bath, I accidently wet my own pants.

I bought tickets to see Dashboard Confessional, one of my favorite bands. I bought the tickets two months ago and totally forgot about it until the show was already over tonight.

I ironically cut my big toe on my cricut (of all things). It was so bad I had to go to the ER and get 10 stitches.

See, no matter which one the lie is, it was a bad night.

And no, I will never admit what the truths are.

I Know The Awesomest People

2011-12-02T08:21:00.001-05:00

I love that the right people always seem to find themselves into my life at the right time. When we were (miserably) waiting to adopt, I met so many other adoptive families who showered me with support. When I decided to quit my job, cash out my retirement, and throw caution to the no-career-for-now-wind, I suddenly found several other women who did the same thing, making the transition not so scary.

This week, I have been having warm fuzzies about the other moms God has been sprinkling in my life. They are a wealth of knowledge. They are my real life version of Googling a baby question. Several of them now live in the same county, so suddenly Levi has a play date social life that rivals my college years. One of them lives on the freakin' other side of the world, but what she lacks for in physical distance, she makes up for in heart distance (sorry, so cheesy, but so true). Another one is a superhero who I get to call friend and sister. And then there are two or three whose babies somehow grew up to be my age, but can easily remember when they did "back then" and are so willing to share and encourage.

In case you aren't as blessed as I am to have really incredible friends and family, you're in luck. Two of them BLOG!!

My friend Lauren touched me this week when she blogged about how we are the ones who often hold our children back. She's only been a mom for 2 months longer than I have, but her wisdom rocks my world.

...I understand that the lesson is more important than the completion of the task at hand. I want to have patience and understand that teaching as we live life side-by-side is the most effective way of instruction...

Then there's my friend Melody, who is such a "new" friend that we don't even have any pictures of us together (let's change that, okay?). Melody is actually the friend-who-lives-the-closest now at our new place, and she's been a mom for 4 1/2 years. Melody blogged this week about the ministry we have in motherhood.

...When my first impulse would be to scold or nag or even yell at my children, I want to worship instead. Worship by responding kindly, by speaking gently. Worship by dying to myself (and my carpet) and allowing them to enjoy being children. Worship by getting off of Facebook and playing with them...

If you have time today, check out Melody and Lauren's blogs. Also, thanks, Melody and Lauren for being really good mommy friends, and writing about it so I can shamelessly quote you.