my ivf journey

World's Oldest Moms

2010-09-26T23:05:00.000-07:00

World's Oldest Moms

facing it

2010-09-25T10:00:00.000-07:00

I need to write something down to start letting go. I really want to let go but I think I've been forcing myself to let go and be happy too early. I mean really, what was there to grieve? it probably seems silly to others but the process almost took deposits of my emotions, building it high- then a sudden depletion. And I guess I'm just human. My hubbs manifests heartache in different ways.

First week just goes by

2010-09-19T20:20:00.000-07:00

Where to start... few things that I have to write down so I don't forget. Couple of days before the blood test, I had an instintual feeling that it didn't work- heck. to be honest, I didn't think it would work going into this either. I don't know if many girls have this thought....but I never thought I would be pregnant- the idea of carrying a baby in your belly seemed a bit surreal and

a day off

2010-09-14T21:32:00.000-07:00

It's been a day since we heard the news. Negative results to my blood preg. test. We had a good cry, lots of talks lying on the bed- about life, why this(mostly by me), what did I ever do so wrong to deserve this from God, anger, saddness, anger again and saddness, denial. My emotions were high, at some point I was fine- as if nothing happened. then during our conversation, my hubby mentioned

Power of visualization

2010-09-12T20:38:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow I get my blood pregnancy test. I have my appointment at 11AM but will not get results till that night. Torture me why don't you? dangle a carrot at a starving samolian donkey why don't you? no,but kidding aside, I don't think we spoke a word of what would happen between me & my husband for last few days. The closer the date came, less we spoke of serious matter, tip toeing to make

9 days after IVF transfer

2010-09-10T22:57:00.000-07:00

I called the EN to see if i can get the pregnancy test done tomorrow- no go. They need 2 weeks from the egg retrieval day apparently. I was doing great yesterday, and today...is not so good. I'm trying to keep things on the light side, steering away from the negative comments, thoughtless people.. My hats off to those who has done this more than once. I bow to you with my utmost respect,

Eight days after IVF transfer

2010-09-09T12:02:00.000-07:00

Ugh. So far, every day since the 5th day has been getting better. That darn 5th day was a toughey, and according to others, I'm handling this pretty well. Lots of tears on peoples' eyes waiting for the result. Tomorrow is my dad's birthday...his 73rd! geez- he's getting old. We have 3 girls in our family, and I'm the only one married. My husband's family has him & his sister, but he's the

2010-09-08T14:08:00.001-07:00

2 embryos that were excellent

2010-09-07T11:32:00.000-07:00

I went outside for the 2nd time today to walk around and see my little garden. I think I get this trait from my parents. I used to see them stay outside working on the garden all day long, making nursery trips and discussing what trees to plant where and why this doesn't work, we should do that or do this. There are things that we don't realize till we reach a certain time in our lives to

We love you

2010-09-05T12:11:00.000-07:00

Fourth day of IVF transfer. I often jump to conclusions and think the worst of things, and this is definetely eating me alive at moments. Whew.. take a deep breath. Oh, by the way, I am finally off bedrest! Also my acupuncturist told me a day before the transfer to come back after 3 days after transfer to check the pulse of the baby. So even though it was at the end of day 3, I went to the

Two zygotes, no more

2010-09-03T20:17:00.000-07:00

Bedrest....I feel so sore from lying Down. Embryo transfer went smoothly and now we're just waiting for some kind of miracle. There are signs of god everywhere. Will write more when I can actually sit and type :)

They have no tax, free shipping. I buy all my household cleaners from them- all natural~

2010-09-01T21:37:00.001-07:00

so far there are Three

2010-09-01T21:36:00.000-07:00

So. EN tells me that I have 3 zygotes, they all divided, but two of them are better than one other. He will call me after he has his meetings with his endocrinologist. I got a suggestion from a friend to keep beliving that God has the right plan for me. I am keeping myself occupied. Surround myself with positive energy & keeping it going. Please pray for me, if you can. My hubby called

2010-08-31T20:10:00.000-07:00

Acupunture helps IVF

2010-08-31T17:53:00.000-07:00

Caller ID says "Dr.XXX" my EN. I pick up and he starts telling me the situation of our eggs & zygotes. He harvested 7, 5 was attempted to fertilize, 4 were actually fertilized. Since it's less than the number that he was looking for, he said it's unclear if we need to proceed in 3 days or 5 days. Okay. Bring it on. What next? Nothing is clear so far, but heck you know what? that's fine. I

Lucid Dream

2010-08-30T21:06:00.000-07:00

I had a change of heart this morning. Something didn't feel right- we opted for 10 eggs to be fertilized, due to recommendation of the coordinator...she basically gave us worst case scenario and for us to be ready to fail & do this again. Ha. I can't imagine doing this again. Especially after today. I also remembered Dave Ramsey saying not to make any decisions out of fear- that is the wrong

Blessed

2010-08-29T20:50:00.000-07:00

I was speaking with a groundskeeper at our church today about a homeless woman who wonders into our church to look for coffee. Our church is on a major street, and from time to time- according to the groundskeeper, has visitors wondering around the premise. He was trying to describe the homeless woman, and I knew who he was referring to...but what he said sort of stuck in my head. He described

Farewell injections! but one more on the butt.

2010-08-28T18:58:00.000-07:00

Ah...my ultrasound today had shown that my eggs were grown and "well done" as the good Doctor says. :) Things are looking good and we're all set to go for egg retrieval on first thing Monday morning. My husband is to give me a 10,000U of HCG trigger shot on my butt exactly around 10:30PM tonight. I hope he doesn't miss my butt. haha. 30~35hrs later, the eggs are retrieved, very very time

Positive thinking

2010-08-27T21:50:00.000-07:00

What a difference a change of perspective can make. Since yesterday, I keep reminding myself about the promise I made to me & my hubby about staying strong and not get emotional. Hubby comes home and tells me that he feels attached to our future baby! I looked at him and thought....oh no, don't you start getting emotional on me. He's been pretty good, the pillar of emotional strength, but I

Make Money at Home With a Free Blog Site

2010-08-26T23:44:00.000-07:00

Make Money at Home With a Free Blog Site

$30 per vial for Menopur!

2010-08-26T23:33:00.000-07:00

http://www.pharmacyrxworld.com/buy-Menopur.html It's a canadian pharmaceutical company, but it's only $30/vial of 75iu Menopur! Cheapest I found, free shipping with $49 or more order. But order early, it takes 10~15days for you to receive the meds.

Day 9 of ivf

2010-08-26T15:13:00.000-07:00

I had a revelation. I was on my way to my 11AM appointment at EN, and last two days have been...well, not pretty. Two days ago, i saw 2 eggs out of 13 growing, and with that- we had to wait 2 more days to find out if this is going to be a failed ivf. So much time spent on finding out on the net about what that means, my EN didn't give me a clear answer, but did say that it doesn't have much to

Baby On Mind: The Very Expensive World of IVF Meds

2010-08-25T23:54:00.000-07:00

Baby On Mind: The Very Expensive World of IVF Meds

more encouraging pictures from my baby garden!

2010-08-25T18:38:00.000-07:00

Heirloom Greens!Olive treeDwarf Meyer LemonSpring Green Onions!all images copyright Mindee Choi photographs 2010

Easy way to injections / tips on painless way to inject medicine

2010-08-24T19:03:00.000-07:00

If you're anything like me....your heart stops a beat and your blood pressure drops when you see a needle coming at you. Have no fear my dear! I have a tip. I've been injecting myself for over 3 IUI's and now, ivf. I'm a pro. :) hey, at least I got this technique out of it! so what you do after you got all your meds in your needle & tapped out the bubbles. 1. find your spot, 2 fingers below