Just how are you feeling today? Happy, joyous, vibrant? Or perhaps you are feeling low, sad or depressed?

Feelings or emotions are the central point of how we live our lives. Emotions charge our actions, and our actions chart our lives. That is why each time we are bored, nothing gets done. Each time we feel energetic and lively, it everything seems to fall in place automatically.

Emotions are powerful. And there’s many of them. If not hundreds, maybe there are thousands different emotions that a human can feel. But generally out of these thousands of emotions we are only stuck with a few. And most out of those few are negative emotions. Angry, sad, jealous,frustrated and disgusted are the most common feelings that come to us. We really seldom feel exhilarated, joyful or enthusiatic. Even if we do feel exhilarated, it is only when we give ourselves a temporary material drug; a new (bank-loaned) sports bike for example.

I can see why; we are living in a modern world that is confusing everyone. We have to find money to live, as we are bound by the laws of modern living. The law says that you need to have a 9-5 job to earn a living. The law says you need to take big loans from banks to stay in a house or buy a car. The law also assumes that you must spend your mornings and evenings depressed in oceans of traffic jam. You are tied to the materialistic regulations that drains your energy, and keeps you away from your true self. And thus, we forget to be happy.

Choose how you feel

Amidst the relentless, tiring, exhausting job that you are in, take some time for this remedy. Look up to the skies, enjoy the fascinating artwork of nature, take pleasure from the vibrant gradients of the sky. If you have trees around you, let your eyes wander on its swaying branches, magnificent trunks and beautiful leaves. I assure you that you immediately will feel glad, because you will again remember that life is full of glorious and magnificent things.

Life is not so bad, actually. You are still living, in one piece, and you have a good life so far. You are probably not as rich as Michael Jackson, but you aren’t crippled, dying or live in a dumpster either. Life is a miracle, a great gift from God with so many happiness in it. Cling to this emotion; there is so much more in life than being sad, angry or hating others. There is simply too much more. Get out there and enjoy life, not hating it.

If you can control your emotions, you can control your life.

Just remember this: “I feel, therefore I am.”

Share and Save

I feel lucky

How lucky we are; we can still enjoy cable TV, we still have Tesco to shop, and most of all, we are most lucky to be here living, breathing and functioning perfectly as a human being.

Despite the deafening crash of the world’s economy, we still live. Some of us may suffer job termination , slump in sales or perhaps salary cut but otherwise we are still in one piece, we haven’t starve to death yet, and we haven’t slept on walkways yet.

Catasthrophes happen, to attest you

Just yesterday a friend told me that he is filing for a divorce. This friend is one of the most caring human being i have ever met, so the news hit me like thunder. The 11 months marriage is shattered to pieces, and I assure you, that is one major disaster more destructive than any plummeting stock market or credit crunch.

A quote says:

“Everything is this material world is only a temporary, loan, not permanent.”

And how I so much cling to the fact that my car and house belongs to me, they do not.

And that divorce really got me thinking, how fragile life is, and just how lucky I am.

Share and Save

People say that abundant wealth comes from doing business. And due to the law of attraction countless people have come and entice him with ear candies, ranging from heavenly MLMs, to contract farming of Agarwood trees. There are also others who persuade him with other “passive incomes” like pre-owned telephone booths, reselling Internet accounts, insurance schemes investments and stocks purchase, in which he has fallen prey to some. All that, in the name of getting richer.

Waking up

Ironically, Jenz Iggo baffles to the fact that he got sweaty whenever the month comes to end. Bills to pay, kids to feed, as he grapples on to his paycheck trying to make a living. “Is this how you become richer?” sometimes he argues. Definitely something is wrong with the system.

There is something wrong indeed. There is a massive boulder that jams his stream of income,the one that he finally recognize; debt.

Jenz Iggo was living in the urban credit fantasy. He thought that debt is a cool way of living a modern life. He could swipe his plastic and bring home a shiny car. He could apply for loans to fund stock purchases. But indeed, the debt that he has voluntarily chosen has become the primary reason for him not going anywhere.

Debt is a tool yes, but only for the banks

People say money makes money. So to make money is to have money, and when you dont have any, then borrow! Debt is an excellent tool, bank managers say. Well bankers, debt is indeed a tool, a tool that makes banks wealthier by the day, while the defaulters end up living a stressful miserable life !

When you borrow money, you virtually create unnecessary burden that actually hinders you from gathering more money. It binds you, and put a shackle on your legs until you cannot walk. Its like stopping at a traffic light, but you never get to see the colour green. You’re driving, the gas is burning, but you cannot engage the gear.

Sure, stock investment, mutual funds and insurances will make you richer. But what these salespeople were not honest about is that all these investments are really volatile.

If only…

Jenz Iggo was then dragged away in his fantasy. “If only”, he thought, “I don’t have to pay the car’s monthly installment, I am 60K richer by now. 60,000 dollars cash! I couldn’t imagine having that kind of balance flashing on my ATM screen!”

But friends and relatives would ridicule me for driving my mom’s Saga that is about to fall apart any second. I wouldn’t look cool and sharp if i’m not driving something branded. I need to get that car!

That’s why you are not rich

Jenz Iggo, by driving that stupid marque of yours, you have lost 60K for the past years. Plus another 20K thanks to the imported spareparts and KL’s instant flood.

And you are losing not just the because of car. You smoke, you have credit cards under your belt, study loans, personal loans and all the other grandfather loans, and you did that just to look cool! Jenz Iggo! Looking cool and sharp is costing you a fortune! And don’t talk about being a millionaire!

You can drive a Chip-Foosed car. You can have stock portfolios. You can have that D3 with the 20,000 dollar lens. You can live in a three storey bungalow. You can do anything. But not now Jenz Iggo. Later, when you have saved the money. If you don’t have the money, and you use debt to look cool and intelligent, then trust me, that you will definitely stay broke and poor!

Share and Save

Have you ever seen such drama? I bet you have. And the little child who screamed until its audible in the washrooms was maybe you during your early years. And this is no shame, as children we don’t really think about things, and when we want something, we want it that instant. Else we throw tantrums or even bang our head on a wall.

The habit brought forward

What shame it is, for the habit to be carried forward in adulthood. And what’s worse is, the community accepts this. We don’t throw tantrums nowadays, but we opt for something much more nightmarish, debt; or a more modern way to say it, credit. We get ridiculed if we don’t own one of those golden credit cards.

You don’t have enough money to buy that super comfy sofa? No worries! We got a 12 month payment plan for you! You got no money for a car downpayment? Relax! With us, you dont have to pay a single cent! Got an itch to buy a PDA phone? Charge it on your plastic! And people feel there’s nothing wrong with that. There’s nothing wrong to rent-to-buy stuff as long as I can afford the monthly payment, some says. There’s absolutely nothing wrong using my credit card to purchase things i couldn’t afford now, simply because I want the item now! Not later! Now, now now!
And here is where the child tantrum of floor-grinding head-banging repeats.

Well, I tell you what. Instant things are never of quality. Trust me. Microwaved pizza. Instant polaroid photos. Instant car loan approval. They all share the same thing: acceptable, but not of quality. Nothing beats a hand made dough and slow cooked tomato sauce. Nothing beats a meticulous lighting setup for a portrait. And nothing beats buying a car with cold hard cash.

Being robbed in the daylight

There is an anxiety among people who say,” I carry credit cards because they are safe. I could be robbed if I carry cash, you know.” Well listen here you intelligent college graduate, with a credit card, you are being robbed every day in your life!

Lets make a simple calculation on credit card. Let say you spend a $1000 and wish to pay the sum in 12 month with 18% annual interest. The layman calculation of a minimum payment is this:

$1000 x 18% yearly interest = $1180
$1180 / 12 months = $98.3

Yay! I can afford a new camera! I dont mind paying a small extra to the bank!
But hold on your horses, junior.The real predatory calculation is this:

You swipe a transaction at $1000.
1st month you pay $98.3. Balance outstanding = $901.7
Bank further charge 1.5% on your balance, and it now comes to $915.22
2nd month you pay again $98.3. Balance outstanding = $ 816.92
Bank further charge 1.5% on your balance, and it now comes to $829.17.
The bank will always charge interest on your balance! Get that?

And you wont pay the whole loan for 12 months. It will be a whopping 20 months! The bank robs you blindly in broad daylight. And don’t blame them because there is a tiny 6pt font clause behind your statement that says bank will charge interest on your monthly rest. And thats a mere $1000. Wait till you go on a swiping spree until your card is maxed. And further wait until you maxed out your second, third, or whatever number of cards that you may have. The damage will be colossal!

See how they rob you? And mind you, this is only credit cards! There’s car loans, housing loans, and all other loans that prey upon us out there.

Financial stability: foundation for a happy life

We couldn’t live without money, even if some say money is not number one in life. But a healthy financial standing would help a lot for you to build a good life, and to become a successful person.

Make a budget, spend wisely. Grow up, dont subsribe to the immature childish tantrums. If you want something but you don’t have the money, then you simply cannot afford it. Live within your means. Carry cash. Pay cash. Pay off all debts, and cut that plastic off. If you really need a plastic, get a Debit plastic. Forget the Junids who flash new alloys rims with the latest PDAs in their glossy Prada suits. If they are not millionaires, they are probably as broke as you.

For free Financial consulting, please visit http://www.akpk.org.my and no, this is not a pay per post thingie. They can really help. Oh yes, the Simple Dollar is an awesome place for free excellent tips on money.

Share and Save

Malaysia, a respectable oil-producing country, through its Prime Minister yesterday, has hiked up oil prices, where consumers are facing almost 40% increase. And expect no other excuse than to blame the world’s oil market, and how the Government can no longer tolerate the subsidy.

And thank you Malaysians for always being the frugal type, jamming up all the trunk roads to save 40 bucks before the deadline ends last midnight. 40 bucks is really worth the wait, I guess.

The spillovers

Some white haired guy from the Ministry has said, “The hike would have no effects on other industries.”

What genius at work! You must be saying that food prices are going to stay, inflation rate unchanging and we still got our currency valuable when traded. If that is really true, I won’t mind even a 100% fuel hike.

But the piercing truth is otherwise. A slight change in such sensitive commodity will have big if not enormous impact to the surrounding industries. And this, is not a postulate, my white-haired friend. It is how the market runs, if you haven’t heard that already from your consultants from Kenanga.

My view

While I may sound hurt, the way I look at it is nothing more than this:

This is life, that changes by the moment, where everything is volatile, and we got no choice other than to embrace it.

Sure enough Malaysian citizens have rights, to show protests, to promote disagreement, and to bash the ruling party. But would all that help? Seriously, if the complains, protests, and bashing can help to reduce the oil prices, (and that means I can re-fit my snazzy 18″ and rev up all to the redline) then by all means count me in. I pledge my honor to carry your demonstration banner up in front the Ruler’s palace.

But if the endless prejudicial citizen-vs-ruler hatred is only resulting nothing in the end, so please, let us find a better channel.

The way I respond

It is critical that we live consciously. We need to be aware of what steps do we take while building our life to its end. Let no petrol hike nor pressing food shortage stop us for being the person we want to be. If the things are expensive, then we just simply can’t afford it. Choose an affordable way then.

There is no shame living life within your means. What shameful is to be a hypocrite, living the life we actually cannot afford.

So if you have not, let us find the serendipity from this issue. This is a real good chance to re-evaluate your expenditures, minimize lavishness, and plan your future. Take the driver’s seat, and be in control of your life. Ranting endlessly will only attract delays and block your way to success.

Yes, perhaps most of you disagree. Then whack me if you feel so.

Share and Save

A 6 letter word that spells unseen fear to many and to the rest it brings good tidings on how the future looks like. Change is interpreted in different ways across cultures, and that explains why some cultures are far ahead others, and far more developed. The ones who are forward thinking, success oriented will never fail to initiate and embrace intense changes throughout their lives.

Change is sure

Being an inevitable force in nature, change can be emphatic as well as chosen, as it comes in both bitter and sweet flavor. But too many times change comes when we least expect, and brings together not only alteration of how we live life, but also discomfort and sometimes torture. This is the case when we meek human beings subscribe to a false perception: the fictitious stability perception. We get education, we get jobs, we get paid and we get ourselves fancy cars, just to be fooled with the false perception of stability, that life is somewhat secure and nothing can stagger us. This is further reinforced if we have some sum in the bank.

But the hard truth is nothing is going to stay the same. Your stability is just a perception. It is physics of nature, the law of life, for everything to undergo a cycle of ups and downs, and nothing, absolutely nothing on earth remains the same. Every entity on earth is either affected or affecting other items so that the change cycle goes on, in an unbroken chain. With every blade of grass, every gush of wind, every splash of sea, this cycle will continue to maintain the delicate balance of nature. Change is really, the essence of life.

Why do we resist

Humans are so resistant to change. We almost hate it; as we are so accustomed with our daily rituals that have embedded a permanent image in our mind, an image which we see as perfect and non-changeable. We are resistant even to small changes. I have once felt dejected simply because my office department was reorganized. We had to switch cubicles, and oh my, how I love my cubicle after sitting there for three years everyday! I frantic upon even such small change!

Sometimes when it comes to change, we lack faith. Yes it requires a leap of faith to move to some unknown direction, with only elusive promises that the new direction is going to make us better. Normally when the risk outweighs the change, we choose to stand still rather than to take action. We absolutely love the current comfort of our chair! We always choose mediocrity, and that’s the root of the cause!

Embracing change

Technically, the process of change sifts through two levels of judgement; the rational being, and the emotional being. We subconsciously evaluate upcoming changes via these two faculties, and the change would not be possible if permission is not granted by either one of the faculty.

Take changing jobs for example. Our calculative mind would reason higher salary and better career future, but the emotional mind may kick back and say, “I love my colleagues; I don’t know whether I can survive in the new place, and I am not sure I will be happy”.

The bottom line is that you yourself (cognitive and emotional together) must face the fact that change is inevitable. And we must sincerely want to change. We must want to be better and to stay away from mediocrity. What we can do to dampen the effect is to take action, change first before we are forced to.

While changing cars, cellphones and even family doctors are trivial, the change of attitude is where it matters most. However, most people tend to evade this. People fear to become better person. Funny don’t you think?

Share and Save

Oh how affectionate those memories were! Nothing was important other than playing. Not caring a bit about the world, my devotion was only to have fun, play, and then play some more. Be it toys, cartoon shows or catching grasshoppers in the back lawn, life was so jaunty and ecstatic.

The world changes

It is wonderful life to live, at such age. Everything seem just in place, fresh and exciting, and apart from the never-ending cries about the toy that I longed for, life was magically simple and exhilarating. Oh how it differs nowadays!

Then things got more complicated as I grew older. The school, albeit more fun with new friends, has brought a new set of perspective of how the world looks like. I assumed various positions throughout my education days, from a class treasurer, to a school prefect. I don’t recall why I had accepted such responsibilities, other than at that time I was feeling important and intelligent, in which was fallacious.

I do not deny the experience and exposure at such tender age. However all those post-school activities, the school representation in competitions, the public speeches and the scoring in exams has turned me into a busy kid when I was supposed to hang out in weekend park screeching that RC car.

Life is simple, no?

The trend is similar nowadays but with a different magnitude. I find myself unreasonably busy, with the neck breaking Japaneses trying to recreate a racial invasion, the photoshoots that now extends to food photography, unfinished travel articles to write, incomplete online business proposals, songwriting, ailing car, and believe me, the list goes on. I get stuck in too many things that eat up energy and time. And this stuck up was really a self-destructive contrivance, as I am the one who created and choose all these and nobody else.

I recall a spot-on advice by a Syeikh:

” In life, only take the things you need, not the things you want”.

While that piece may sound orthodox and unproductive, the essence rings a hard truth. Life is simple, really. Sufficient food, a good mate, ample clothing, a space to call home, good health and spiritual faith are all basic necessities for a human to live. However due to the competetive nature of man, he sets on a materialistic pursuit and at times these pursuits are illusory and when taken to excess, is self-destructive.

Iron them out

What are the most important things in life? Or should I ask, what are the things that bring the best happiness? Is it driving a soft-top roadster with 19 inch alloys? Is it owning a bungalow and a couple condos in an elite residency that makes your relatives itch with jealousy? Or perhaps being a CEO or even a Director in a company that rakes millions per year? What a person thinks important in life depends on what he values. His values and preferences are two basic rules that determine his priorities and the way he occupies his time.

Yes we want to be sucessful. We abhor being a drifter in life, we want to be more than just another oxygen consumer and ozone depleter. We want to achieve significance, and we want that bad. However, be wary that during our flight, the heavier the baggage, the more we have to pay. The carrier only allows a certain amount, any excess will cost you a premium.

Live life simple. Avoid the complication. Reject debts. Live in moderation. When you really focus only on important things in life, you will find that life is much easier and fun to live. Or would you rather pay the premium, for those extraneous excess baggage?

Share and Save

Our mouth is one small piece of organ that makes the biggest boast. Because of the tongue, heads get hung. How true! But yet we fail to notice that. When we uphold a belief in public, we just throw them out in the air. The tongue has never failed to boast of whatever things that we don’t have or worse things that we didn’t do.

For all sorts of reasons, we declare our chaste doctrines hoping to portray ourselves as perfect beings that abide with all that is good. This is everywhere. From a 2-grader up to national politicians, hypocrisy is extensively and ignorantly demonstrated. Well they say empty cans sound the loudest, don’t they?

Why are you preaching things you never practice?

Since Wiki suggested that hyp is medical term that conveys deficiency, (consider hyp-agelsia), hyp-ocrisy can be attributed to the deficiency of honesty. Can we commonly agree that a hypocrite life is synonymed as immoral, deceitful, insincere, and devious? There is no honor in claming things that you yourself are not practicing. There is simply no integrity.

Now don’t shake your head denying yourself of hypocrisy. We all have been there. We both know it.

You may be an obese who declares to your friends to get your tummy flat but at night ice-creams and chips are your best company. Perhaps you are a doctor who campaigns about the dangers of cancer but after lunch time you conceal yourself in a corner to have your dose of nicotine. Or you may be an environmental activist who crusades on the streets protesting about pollution but you drive a 3.0 guzzler to work everyday. Even worse, you flirt with girls when you hang out with your officemates but back at home you stack two dozens of gay porn. Arguably, there is some level of hypocrisy lurking in each of us.

Why we say things that aren’t actually ourselves? Why do we hide the fact that we are also wrongdoers, a fallen prey to our ever-hungry ego, putting false masks trying to act as someone that are not actually real? Why? Is it because we are protecting our status quo? But which status quo is protected when integrity is not a part of it?

The hypocrite criteria

The signs of a hypocrite are three; whenever he speaks, he lies, whenever he promise, he breaks, and when he is entrusted with something, he betrays. What I realized is that once you put on a lie, the other two comes naturally. Thus lying is the true foundation of hypocrisy.

Being a blogger is no different.The chance of being a hypocrite actually doubles. The internet enables anyone to play the split-personality game. Everybody wants traffic and fame on the blogosphere, and by becoming a do-gooder guru on the net, there is more than a slight chance that people will recognize you as someone trustable and perhaps of candor, where in reality all you are is the otherwise.

So be a true you. Don’t let that burden of false-pretender encumber you to lead a successful worthy life. It is indeed a heavy load trying to pull many personalities in one body. There is no sin in advising people to do good, but make sure the good things you are preaching are the things that you practice. Otherwise the advise just fall dead and unworthy.

However in a corporate environment, salespeople and marketing champions may disagree with me. Posh cars and designer suits must stay on even if that means crying all the way to the bank. Well, if that’s the case, let’s cross swords. Or instead, if you are a hypocrite of some sort, you may want to tell me what kind of hypocrite are you.

—————————————————————————————

I love to hear your feedback! Please share your thoughts and critiques! And if you enjoyed this post, you can always get free updates via RSS or email.

Share and Save

Recently things were not as brilliant as I thought it would be. Unimaginable things happen all of a sudden, in a string of unstoppable chain. It started with the unborn child that never gets to see the world, the kid falling from the bed, the wife had an accident that made her car turned over and finally it stopped when I ran into a motorbike that send both the riders crashing on the ground. And, boy I wonder, how did I attract these catastrophes in a very short time? Is this Law of Attraction, or simply an incomprehensible greater power at work?

In life, despite how positively charged your thoughts are, there will be occasions when you feel you are the unluckiest person on earth. The Secret gurus pointed out that we attract everything that comes into our life, negative occurrences included. Even when unwanted circumstances happen, they say, it is the result of what we have unawarely thought of.

My question is, how true is that? Never on earth the wife ever thought of having an accident with the car tumbled over. Miscarriage has never crossed our minds before knowing that we have a healthy lifestyle. The tragedies were traumatic, but thank God my dear wife is the kind who looks forward.

Life is a mystery

The old adage precisely said, “Man plans, but the Heaven ordains.” We may have our intricate plans, but it is not us who have the final say. The life clogwork is too complex and too sophisticated for a human to comprehend. While the basic theory of vibrating positive thoughts may bring us what we want, it does not always work that way. Trust me, there is another huge piece to this mystery that no human ever deciphered. We do not always get what we want.

For those who share the same misadventures, let us not allow these to shackle our legs from moving, block our minds from developing or hinder our success from manifesting. Be patient and grateful as with any adversity, there will always be an equal opportunity. The Lord is always with those who are patient.

And I hope that Law of Attraction flagbearers may throw in something in response.

—————————————————————————————

I love to hear your feedback! Please share your thoughts and critiques! And if you enjoyed this post, you can always get free updates via RSS or email.

Share and Save

Reasoning

Reasoning IS in fact, an act of persuasion. When a person’s argument is blemished by flawed reasoning, usually those flaws can be traced back to them, resulting in fallacy. Not all flaws, however, can be technically labeled as fallacies. Some of these flaws might signify very specific blunders in their reasoning, be it a flaw in a person’s attitude or probably how do they approach the subject matter as a whole.

As a general rule of thumb, the more incompetent a person is at a given skill, the less likely they are to realize it because they also lack the metacognitive skills necessary to evaluate their performance. All of the reason which is why a lot of people don’t really realize that they are wrong, simply because they can’t effectively prove that they are right in the first place. This is where I came in.

More than right or wrong

Not until these recent years, I have been actively observing the masters of persuasive reasoning in action, realizing now that there’s a lot more than meets the eye when it comes to ‘right or wrong’. It is actually widely practiced by fancy lobbyists, stern lawyers, creative spin-doctors, inquisitive journalists, controversial writers and some might even be friends of ours. Surprised? What do all of them have in common? I remembered an excerpt taken from a movie that I watched a fortnight before. It sounded pretty much like this,

“If you can prove that you are right, you’ll never be wrong…”.

This statement can be regarded as the gist from the subject of the matter, which is persuasive reasoning. In the next part, I will elaborate more on how and why the mechanics of reasoning, can change the course of a situation.

So in this short Part 1, here is the rule;

Lesson 1 – If you can prove that you are right, you’ll never be wrong.

Ilham Suardi is an experienced lecturer in Bostonweb College Kuala Lumpur. He runs his own blog at Ilham Suardi’s Nonsense.

————————————————————————————————————-

I love to hear your feedback! Please share your thoughts and critiques! And if you enjoyed this post, you can always get free updates via RSS or email.

Share and Save