My Modern Country

Ski Trip And Birthday Bash

2012-02-29T19:14:00.000-08:00

I mentioned a few weeks ago, we were preparing for a fiftieth birthday party for my good friend.

And that it involved travel.
We didn't leave our beautiful state, we just headed northwest.

We headed for the hills. Winter Park, Colorado...here we come!

Stunning-isn't it?

We had rented a mountain home, a big one. There was seventeen of us!

Wranglers and I enjoyed a ride on the gondola to get into the village.

Once in the village, we met up with the rest of our group in a little tavern.

Wranglers, my brother, and my bff's hubby are discussing some serious bull.

Here I am with the girls. The one in the black hat and white jacket, is the birthday girl!
She and I have been best friends since we were five years old. My sister-in-law is in the green, and my soul sister is on the end. Two of these chicks are grandmas!

I have lived in Colorado all my life, and never been tubing. I was always too busy skiing.
On this day, we all decided to go the tubing route.

I wasn't sure. Not sure at all.

But, my dear friend helped me along.

Wranglers has the camera, and he's yelling, "push her! hurry, before she jumps!"
I was terrified!

And, after I made it to the bottom, I realized there was a good reason for the terror.
The speed of that tube, on that snow, on that ~~mountain~~ hill, is just too much for words.

I couldn't even scream.

Or breathe.

I loved it. And hated it.

And kept going, and going. Tubing is addictive.

It was a huge blast!

Someone got the great idea to hook our tubes together and then go.

Oh, man.

Here we are at the bottom. Making sure all of our body parts are still attached.

How do you get back to the top, you ask?

My beautiful niece will demonstrate.

The strap on her tube is hooked on to a pulley system thingy, and it pulls you and your tube all the way to the top. Pretty cool.

Here's the house we rented.

The view from every room was just beautiful.

I wouldn't mind doing dishes with a view like this.

One night we made a million pizzas.

They were perfect for the whole crew.

Wranglers just hanging out.

Girls Gone Wild.

We had such a great time. All seventeen of us.

Wranglers And His FFA Annual Nut Fry

2012-02-27T19:25:00.002-08:00

Last week was a busy, busy week.

It was National FFA Week.

And if you happen to be married to a FFA Advisor, then you know what I mean.
(If you are not familiar with FFA, it originally started out as Future Farmers Of America, but has grown to so much more.)

Okay, so it wasn't busy for me, cause all I had to do was show up. Wranglers and his kids do a great job of promoting their program with activities like...

a petting zoo

games for the entire school

a coloring contest for the elementary and preschool children

drive a tractor to school day

a Rocky Mountain Oyster Dinner for the community

and on the last day, a breakfast for teachers, administrators, and supporters

The Rocky Mountain Oyster Dinner, is more commonly called the Nut Fry.

It has nothing to do with oysters, trust me.

People come from all over the area for this dinner. The beauty of it...the kids do it all!

We estimated around three hundred people...that's a lot of nuts.

After the dinner, some of the FFA members are "auctioned off" for a day of work.

This year our son, stood at the helm with his dad, as the President of the organization...gush...

In the background you see a "brand" quilt. Area ranchers buy a space on the quilt for their livestock brand.

At the end of the evening, a drawing is held to give the quilt to one of the brand owners.

This gal is one of his program's most devoted supporters. She brought the quilt idea to Wranglers, AND, she and her helpers put the whole thing together. I have to add that she lost her home last summer to a fire during our extreme drought. But, that didn't stop her. Thanks Deb-you are so very appreciated!

The money raised from this quilt is used for scholarships for our local FFA members.

By the end of the evening, over twelve thousand dollars was raised from the hired hand sale. Now, that is amazing for a community this small, considering our ranchers and farmers have suffered so much, due to the drought in our area.

I want to add, this organization does so much for our community. Anytime someone needs a project completed or "muscle power", they call on Wranglers and his group of dedicated FFA Members. This is truely an organization to be proud of!

Needless too say, I am one proud mom and wife :)

Birthday Quote Jar

2012-02-15T15:47:00.000-08:00

My bff is turning 50 very soon.

And for the record...she is older than me.

In honor of the occasion, her dear friends and family are planning a super cool celebration. I will share those details with you later. I will tell you this...it involves travel.

One of the things we are doing is a Birthday Quote Jar. Or maybe I should say... it turned into a "things you should know" jar.

Either way, for a "milestone" birthday, it is a great idea, brought to me by my ~~partner in crime~~ sister-in-law.

She also found some hilarious quotes and very important "things" one should know. These are really funny and helpful...you know...for older people, like my dear friend.

I found this cute jar at Dollar General. Then I printed "Things You Should Know By The Time You Turn 50", on parchment paper, and cut to fit inside the jar.

I also printed the quotes my sister-in-law found, and placed each quote in the jar.
To add a little more fun, we made up some of our own "things you should know", and put them in the jar also. heehee ;)

Then I just topped it off with a piece of jute.

A Rescued Mirror

2012-02-04T09:32:00.000-08:00

Last weekend I went digging through our shack. What? You didn't know we have a shack?

It's actually a pretty cool out-building on the ranch. We were told it was the school house for the family who originally homesteaded here.

This is The Shack.

Anyway, we use it for storage, and a place to keep one of our extra freezers.

And it has some orphaned items stored in there, which I like to dig through once in a while.

We were gonna throw out this mirror, cause it looked like it was in pretty bad shape.

And it had bird poop all over it.

And spider webs.

I can deal with bird poop. I can wrangle a snake with the best of 'em. And I can deal with an occasional mouse-although, I have been known to throw away the mouse AND the trap. It's really the best way to dispose of the little critter. However, spiders are another matter.

But, I decided maybe, just maybe I could muster up the courage to deal with the webs, clean it up and do something with it.

I used a stick to remove the spider webs from all the nooks and crannys.

A very long stick.

Removed the mirror.

Sprayed on a primer. Then a coat of flat black.

Then, sprayed two coats of white. I let it dry overnight, then took some
fine sandpaper to distress it a little.

I haven't decided if it's gonna be a mirror or a chalkboard.

I sprayed the back board with chalkboard paint. Guess it will be a
multi-purpose frame, cause it's super easy to change out.

I'm so glad this mirror and frame didn't make it into the trash. I just love the detail.

What do you guys think...mirror or chalkboard?

Linking up with Funky Junk Interiors
                           Craft-O-Maniac
                           Cindy Adkins' Whimsical Musings
                            Uncommon Designs

Blogging Tips And Inspiration

2012-02-03T09:02:00.000-08:00

Recently I discovered my blog had "word verification" enabled. I'm not sure how that happened, as I precisely remember disabling that feature.

At least I think I remember doing that! Please tell me...has my blog ALWAYS had that feature on?

Inquiring minds want to know.

I certainly understand when someone wants to have the word verification feature, but I personally like to keep it simple. There may come a time, when I change my mind about this.

I've been known to do that a time or two...hundred.

Donna, over at Funky Junk Interiors has a TON of great advice in this post

Making Your Blog More Visitor Friendly

Not to mention her blog is full of fantastic DIY projects, as well as, a very inspirational story on her "About Me" page.

Another beautiful blog with great blogging tips and lots of pretties (with tutorials) is

Cindy Adkins' Whimsical Musings

My little blog has a long way to go, but I am always looking for ways to make it better. In fact, right now, my blog is all over the place.

Kinda like me!

Here is the mix....

Country life.

A few projects.

A recipe or two.

More than one snake incident.

Dogs. Horses. Goats. And various other critters.

Wranglers ;)

Yep, that's me. All over the place.

I think it's the hot flashes...yea that's it.

I have found some really great tips out there, now....I have to find the time to make the changes.

So much to do, sooooo little time....

Until next time,

THE END

Re-Purposed Burlap Gift Bags

2012-01-29T18:32:00.000-08:00

During the holidays, our business receives numerous gifts from vendors and customers.

We received several burlap bags with peanuts. Well, with our employees, the peanuts didn't last long, but the leftover bags were just too cute to toss.

Sooooo, I took the bags, grabbed some mason jars, and stenciled on some numbers with black paint.

Added some candles, stuck them on my mantel....and there ya go!

I keep lots of candles on hand, and of course, mason jars for my famous dill pickles. Not bad for...well...um...FREE!

Linking up with Craft-O-Maniac
Rasing Oranges
Homemaker On A Dime

Small Town Snowstorm

2012-01-24T19:14:00.000-08:00

Last month we had a snowstorm. A big one.

I posted some of the pictures from around the ranch, but here are some I took in our small town.

This is a shot in front of our business.

This snow allowed me to have a snow day at home. Cause the roads were closed.

And our vehicles were stuck.

I love a snow day.

And here is the view down our Main Street.

And here's what Main Street looked like when they finally opened up the highway.

This, my friends, is the preferred method of transportation for the locals. He came in our store for tow ropes, then headed directly to our one and only grocery store with his wife's list.

And here are a few more shots around the ranch.

And this, folks, really is the Middle Of Nowhere!

Vintage Believe Sign

2012-01-15T19:26:00.000-08:00

Over the weekend, I went out to the barn and rummaged through some of our scrap lumber.

I came out with an almost perfect 1x4. Using a router made the edges have a little more character, but it's not totally necessary. It's just my preference.

I know there are many ways to make a vintage looking sign, but for me, it's all about keeping it simple, man.

A base coat of black paint. Then a coat of ivory paint. A little sandpaper action around all the edges, and bada-bing, it's all done but the ~~cryin~~ inspirational word. I chose Believe, because for me it's a pretty powerful word.

Because I pretty much prefer "easy", I just used stencils and sponged on the black craft paint.

The last thing, which I almost forgot, was intalling a hanger on the back.

BOOM! I have a new sign.

Linking up at Funky Junk
Homemaker On A Dime
Craft-O-Maniac

About Me

2012-01-12T08:33:00.000-08:00

Once in awhile, I think it's fun to find out facts about other bloggers. You know, stuff we don't always type on the screen.

Here are some things you may, or may not know about me.

1. In 1995, I rented a small space, and opened a children's clothing boutique. I had never worked in
     retail, or been to "market", and had ZERO experience in this type of business. Yea, I'm weird like
     that.
     This little business was not only successful, it was a blast! I would still be there, but in 2000, I
      took  my place in our 50 yr. old family business, along with my dad and two older brothers.

2. I had been a single mom (divorced) for ten years, when Wranglers and I got hitched.

3. Said hitching came only after knowing/dating for three months. Yea, I'm weird like that-are
     we seeing a pattern here?

4. When I try to lose weight....I gain weight.

5. I buy and sell unwanted gold jewelry. I started this little business mostly for family and close
     friends, but it has grown into something more, as people in our small community know and trust
     me.
     This is a lot of fun for me-it's like a treasure hunt!

6. I may have mentioned this before, ....I have the one and only tuxedo rental business in our little
    town.

7. I love making chocolate chip cookies, but....somehow, I manage to eat the bag of chips before I
   ever have time to bake the cookies. This happens one handful at a time.

8. My twenty-two year old daughter is the exact opposite of me. You can see that here....

Well now, wasn't that fun?

Have a great Thursday everyone!

Small Bathroom Remodel

2012-01-08T07:23:00.000-08:00

When I used "Small" in this title, I meant...it's a small bathroom.

And it's a small remodel.

But, none the less, it looks totally different, and that's what I was going for.

And it was cheap. Like only $40.00.

Here's the before...

This plaid wallpaper was not horrible. In fact, I thought it was pretty cute and fit in quite well with our house out here in the boonies.

But, it was just a tad busy for me. Of our three bathrooms, this was the only one with wallpaper, and man, I was ready to take it down.

Until we actually started taking it down.

Then, I was ready to quit. Good gosh, that stuff is a pain in the hiney to remove.

Thankfully, once again, Wranglers swoops in and takes over.

He has way more "staying power" than me.

I found spraying a mixture of vinegar and water on the wallpaper glue or backing, or whatever that stuff is, worked really well.

Okay, actually he did most of it, but from where I was standing, I could tell it really worked.

Without the vinegar mixture, it would only come off in tiny little bits.

I have ZERO patience for this kind of stuff-I am working on that now. You know, with Resolutions and stuff.

So now, for the big reveal....

My lighting wasn't all that great, but the color is kind of greenish brownish-I really don't know what it is, but I like it. It's a calming color. And I can use all the calming I can get.

At a later date, we plan to change out the counter top, and the tile. For now, we are pleased with this cheap and effective remodel.

Do you have any projects you are working on, or planning?

Nine Days

2012-01-04T12:28:00.000-08:00

For the past nine days, I have not had internet service at the ranch.

There have been brief moments of service, then........BOOM. No service.

It's off before I can finish a post. A comment. An email.

Mind you, during this painful nine day period, we were actually gone to Oklahoma for a couple of days.

In Oklahoma, they have internet service.

I am going to move there.

But, while we were visiting family there, I never took advantage of using my mother-in-law's computer.

I could have, but we were busy having too much fun. I figured we would be home soon and I could get my internet fix then.

HOWEVER...I had no idea the internet would not be working when we arrived home.

Had I known this, I would have begged my in-laws to let me move in with them in Oklahoma where the internet service is abundant.

And, where the wind comes sweeping down the plains.

Right at this moment, I have internet.

Because I am at work. Blogging and checking my email. I am pretending to do journal entries in Quickbooks, and that will work for a few more minutes.

The internet company says they will have someone down to the ranch on Friday. (When I say we live in the middle of nowhere, I really mean it). Hopefully we will be back up and running soon.

Until then, Wranglers is frantically trying to find a place for me at internet re-hab.

Please accept my apology for not visiting your blogs and returning emails.

Oh, and....

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

A White Christmas!

2011-12-22T18:59:00.000-08:00

Everyone dreams of a white Christmas.

For those of you in warmer climates, here ya go....

While it's been beautiful, it's also been a bit messy.

Here's what happened to me today.

I thought I could make it.

I'm not really sure how I got in this situation, but I, well uhh.... never mind.

Thankfully, Wranglers came to my rescue.

And while I was laughing and giggling....he...was...not.

I tried to come up with a good and logical explanation, but he wasn't buying.

It took some digging. Both with the tractor, and shovel.

And then, all was good again.

On a brighter note, here's Miss Callie, back on duty as Head Of Ranch Security.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

Baxter The Basset Hound aka The Flying Nun

2011-12-20T16:05:00.000-08:00

Baxter is a short fella.

His legs are only three inches long.

So, when we get a big snow, he chooses to fly.

I took this picture this morning after the snow and wind had stopped.

But, yesterday, during the full blown storm, he was doing the same thing.

And, today, he was king of the snow drifts.

Short boy loves this snow.

It makes him feel tall.

Just to give you a better idea of the magnitude of this storm, I wanted to throw in this picture of Wranglers trying to clear our drive.

Here is one last shot of Baxter.

Not his best side, but ( pun intended), here ya go....

THE END.

p.s. I would love to be able to reply to each of your comments. Does anyone know how to install a reply button on blogger?

Inquiring minds want to know.

Christmas In The Country, Continued

2011-12-19T11:57:00.000-08:00

Yesterday it was sixty eight degrees, and I was outside washing windows wearing nothing but a short sleeved tee shirt.

Wait.

That didn't come out right. I did have jeans and boots on. BUT, I wasn't wearing a coat. That's pretty darn weird for December in Colorado.

Here is what it looks like today.

Well, so much for my nice clean windows.
This storm is a doozie-we are expecting two feet of snow, with forty mph winds.

That, folks, is a true... blue... blizzard.

Back to yesterday, here is Wranglers putting a few adjustments on the Christmas lights.

Yes, that's a tractor.

And, yes, that's Wranglers in the bucket with his Christmas hanger light thingy.

I jumped off the tractor to snap a few photos, so you could see how ~~rednecks~~ we hang Christmas lights in the country.

When it was time for this little operation, Wranglers reminds me, "Now, when I am in the bucket, you raise it up. DON'T FORGET...raising the lever up LOWERS the bucket, and pushing the lever down RAISES the bucket."

Ya, ya. I got it...up is down, and down is up.

Do you guys know how hard it is to think backwards like that?? I have operated this tractor many times, and inevitably, I do the wrong thing first.

This time was no exception.

Mission accomplished!

Catching Some Rays

2011-12-14T12:41:00.000-08:00

Today, on my lunch hour, I made a mad dash out to the ranch.

Yes, we live in the country, and yet it's only about a six and half minute drive from town.

Actually, it depends on who is behind the wheel.

All I'm saying is, I can make it in six and a half minutes.

Anyways, here's the deal.

I have always wondered what our Australian Shepherds did while everyone is away for the day.

Our snow just finished melting yesterday, and the dogs found a good sunny spot to nap and catch some rays.

This is Max and Callie. As you can see, I woke Callie up from a little nap.

Callie has always been The Head Of Ranch Security, and seemed to be quite proud of her position.

But now??? It seems pretty clear to me that Max is the one on high alert and keeping watch, while Callie is sleeping on the job.

Either way...what a life!

Christmas In The Country

2011-12-10T18:07:00.001-08:00

I just love decorating for Christmas.

I just wish I had a decorator to show me the way... And that I had a bigger family room.

Anyhow...here's what we have so far.

Yes, I know-there are no presents under the tree.

Yes, I am in a bit of a panic.
Living in the middle of nowhere, I do most of my shopping on line.

Crossing fingers hoping Santa's Elves get everything delivered on time.

Ha! I really am a poet.
And, you didn't know it.

Sorry.

A Little Bright Spot At Work

2011-12-02T07:59:00.001-08:00

Most of you know, I am a partner in our family owned NAPA Store.

What you don't know, is, selling auto parts is only one of many things we do.

One of our employees had a baby. Actually, his wife had the baby, but you get my drift.

Anyway, recently, the new mommy was under the weather. She happens to be VERY young, and her immediate family lives several hours away.

So....we gladly stepped in! And continue to do so, whenever we are needed.

He is so precious, I can't stand it!

Here is my mom, filing daily invoices, AND hogging the baby.

Both the mommy and the daddy are so appreciative when we help them, but, we LOVE doing it! Might seem a little crazy to let an employee bring a new baby to work once in awile, but that's the way we roll here.

p.s. Don't look at the train wreck on top of the gazillion filing cabinets we have. Now that I said that, of course you are looking. Once I saw this picture, I was so mortified, I cleaned them off completely. Really.

Mom's Banana Nut Bread

2011-11-27T09:37:00.001-08:00

Don't throw out those bananas! Instead, please try this easy and wonderful Banana Nut Bread.

This is probably the best banana nut bread EVAH!

Ingredients:

3/4 cup butter
2 1/2 cups sugar
3 eggs
1 1/2 tsp. baking soda
6 Tblsp. sour milk (who keeps sour milk around)? See below*
1/2 tsp. salt
4 or 5 over-ripe bananas, mashed
1 1/2 cups of chopped pecans
3 cups flour

*For the sour milk, I mix milk and sour cream together. Works like a charm.

Directions:

Cream together: butter, sugar, eggs.

Add: soda, sour milk, and salt.

Add: bananas and pecans.

Fold in flour.

Grease two loaf pans and pour mixture in.

Bake at 325 for one hour.

Frozen Cranberry Salad

2011-11-20T17:00:00.001-08:00

If you are looking for a new way to incorporate cranberries into your Thanksgiving meal, you should give this a try.

I made this salad for the first time several years ago, and both my mom and mother-in-law, look forward to it every year. So now, ~~I have to make it~~ it's a regular player on our holiday menu.

Oh, and the kids love it, too!

Here's the ingredients: Warning....I am NOT a food photographer, or any type of photographer, for that matter. AND, I am not a recipe post person. But, here ya go anyway. And yes, my pineapple can is open. I had already dumped it in the bowl, when I decided to do this post. It's the kind of gal I am.

One container Cool Whip
1/2 cup sugar
5 bananas
1/2 cup chopped pecans
1 can pineapple tidbits, drained
1 can whole berry cranberry sauce

Combine sugar, cranberry and pineapple.

Next find an assistant to peel the bananas. If you don't have a sweet assistant like mine, just add a little more sugar to the mix.

Cut the bananas in half, then slice and add to the cranberry mixture.

Add chopped nuts and Cool Whip.

My assistant actually took this picture. Not bad, Little Man!

Pour mixture in a pan, and freeze.

Remove from freezer thirty minutes before serving.

This salad is pink and pretty.

And yummy.

And the best part....you can make it ahead.

That way, you can spend more time worrying about your turkey.

Or stuffing.

Or broccoli casserole.

Or whether or not your hot rolls are raising properly.

Or......

Moonshine

2011-11-16T05:05:00.001-08:00

Recently, as I was heading out for work, I decided to try a little moonshine.

Weird, I know, since it was only 6:30 am.

Normally, I save all my moonshine activities for the evening, but this particular morning, I couldn't resist.

Yes, I was late to work.

Yes, my bonehead brothers gave me the stink eye. (good thing we are equal partners in the biz)

But...I figure...now that I am, ahem....49, I can do whatever I want to. Including, enjoying a little moonshine before work.

Burp.

Girls Weekend Get Away

2011-11-14T09:04:00.001-08:00

My two best friends and I try to get away several times a year.

No husbands.

No kids.

No pets.

No worries.

Earlier this year, we flew to Phoenix, and had a blast. I'll tell you about it sometime.

This past weekend, we made the four hour trip to Denver.

There were mamogram's, annual exams, blood tests...all kinds of fun stuff.

Ok. Maybe fun, is not the right word.

Necessary stuff.

There. That's more appropriate wording.

After the flurry of doctor appointments there was a reward.

No not balloons, or suckers.

Or Sponge Bob bandaids.

We had tickets to the Broadway Production of The Lion King.

THE LION KING!!!

Image sources: http://www.lionking.com/tickets

Oh, my gosh! It was absolutely wonderful.

The costumes, the actors, the music. It was amazing.

If the production comes to your area, you really should go.

You can read more about the show here.

Hakuna matada...

I AM IN SERIOUS TROUBLE

2011-11-07T18:10:00.000-08:00

Hi. My name is...uh...what's my name??

As most of you know...ok...all of you know we just had a time change.

I knew that yesterday.

And I knew that all day today.

But, at work, at exactly 4:00 today (Monday), I looked at the clock, and thought to my very intelligent self, "hmm...I guess no one ever changed the clock."

So, I promptly grabbed a stick, and moved the clock to 5:00, gathered up my stuff, told our employee to holler at my bonehead brother if he got busy, and headed home.

You probably know, there is something very, VERY, wrong with this picture.

I arrived at home, poured a glass of wine, and started cooking.

Poured another glass of wine.

At 4:30, or what I THOUGHT, was 4:30, Wranglers calls.

Honey, where are you?

Hey, I'm home.

What are you doing home so early?

Uh, it's 5:30. I'm always home at 5:30.

No, honey. It's 4:30.

I swear, my life flashed before my eyes.

I had another out of body experience.

Not only had I left work an hour early, I moved the clock. (Which didn't need to be moved)

IN THE WRONG DIRECTION.

Now, in my defense, I could blame this confusion on the fact that we spent the weekend in Oklahoma, and it is an hour later there.

And for my little blonde brain, that can be confusing at times. Couple that with the end of daylight savings time, all in one weekend, and, well....

Or, I could blame it on the fact that on Saturday night, while in Oklahoma, I took a muscle relaxer.

On Sunday, during the trip back to Colorado, I was in some sort of a coma.

And, surely, I am still not normal.

Note to self....when in need of a muscle relaxer, only take one half of the recommended dose.

Somebody, please help me.

The End.

A Dog And A....Dove?

2011-11-02T17:55:00.000-07:00

This is such a rare sight, I really have no words.

The cat has got my tongue.

I am speechless.

Which according to Wranglers, is much more rare than the photos you are about to see.

The End.

Tuesday Tips And Tricks

2011-11-01T05:24:00.000-07:00

Time for another round of Tips And Tricks. I love candles. But for some reason, I don't burn them much in the summer, however, fall and winter are a different story.

Here are few candle tricks.

When the candle is history, freeze the candle holder, and the wax will pop right out.
Rub out nicks and scratches with panty hose.
Put a small tealight in the burn well of a pillar to extend the candle's life.
Store candles in the fridge or freezer to extend burning time.

Another trick I use for adding scent to my house this time of year is:

Place a few drops of your favorite scented oil in your heater vents.

Okay, one more. This is for those of you who cook fish or seafood:

To cut down on the fish odor, boil lemon wedges on the stove while the fish is cooking.

The Week Of...THE SNAKE

2011-10-27T21:32:00.000-07:00

Well, I told you about the snake outside our door.

But, there's more.

This week, we also had another little, tiny, ahem...snake episode.

I wasn't going to say anything, cause, you know my sweet mother-in-law might be reading this.

Hello, Memaw. If you are reading this, please hit the X button, and go watch tv, or play with the dogs.

So, I arrived home the other evening and joined Wranglers on the porch. It's our routine. We catch up on the events of our day.

When he saw that I had finished my glass of wine, he quickly offered to pour me another.

Wow! I could get used to this.

Then, he said, "honey, there's something I need to tell you. But I don't want to tell you. But I really should tell you."

I'm like, "okay, just tell me already"

He says, "well, when I came home, there was a...a...well...it was a...there...was...a...snake...in...the...kitchen."

Me, "WHHAAAATT?"

A SNAKE.

IN MY KITCHEN?

Surely, this is April Fools Day.

Or not.

Folks, this was the real deal.

And now...I have been officially initiated into the country life.

Help me.

p.s. There are no photographs of this incident, as Wranglers disposed of the evidence, just in case he decided, you know...to keep this a secret. ~~which he should have done.~~