My Religion is Simple

November 12 Q & A - Coupons

2012-11-12T18:07:00.000-08:00

The writing prompt for today asks me to tell you about my favorite place to blog. The short and long answer to this is: my couch. The only way to make this post more interesting is to also talk about coupons.

I had to kill some time today before an appointment and so, for whatever reason, I pulled out some coupons and gave them a gander. I never cut coupons. I had to go to the grocery store, though, and they were sitting there, so why the heck not.

I remember cutting coupons for my parents when I was little, but I don't recall them being as horrible as they are now. Every coupon requires you to buy three, four or five of whatever it is in order to save money. I mean, maybe it's because we're a household of two, but I don't know how we can save any money when we are buying double or triple what we actually need in order to save money. I get the idea is to stockpile food and eventually you'll save money, but jiminy christmas. I'd like to save $0.75 on tampons without having to buy 3 boxes.

November 8 & 9 Q & A - Career and Changes

2012-11-10T20:08:00.003-08:00

Always late, but worth the wait or so my license plate frame said in high school... or maybe that was a bumper sticker. Wait, maybe it was a keychain. All I remember is that I had something that said that on it.

So the writing prompt for last Thursday was:

If you could have any job (and instantly have the training and qualifications to do it), which job would you want?

What job would I want? That's a good one. I would honestly go back to school to make any of these a reality if I didn't already have a student loan the size of a car (mercedes) payment: interior designer, teacher, marriage and family therapist, or school counselor. I would also not mind going to law school, but that is not really part of the question. Just a random fact. Interestingly enough, I went to school for interior design for one or two semesters, and I am part way there for the other three... Oh, but the question stipulates that I instantly have the training and qualifications.

I think I need more creativity in my nine to five life so I suppose if I had to narrow it to one, I would say interior design. I'd like to work with colors, patterns, textiles, different floor plans, different styles and tastes. It would be like putting a puzzle together, and I think I'd like it very much. I stopped working toward it in school because I didn't care much about my own well being back then, just my loser boyfriend. My PSA to the young ladies of today would be: never sacrifice yourself!

On to the next question. It was from yesterday and goes a little something like this:

If you could change one thing about your life right now, what would it be?

Aside from the obvious (having kids) I would say I would change my fear of flying. Just a short tidbit: Nick and I had a vacation planned this past September. We were going to go to Washington DC and New York. I got to the airport and cried. I didn't think I could do it. I battled between knowing that I would disappoint my husband if I didn't go and torturing myself if I did go. Flying to me is torture. That is the only way I can describe it. For my husband, I tried. We were the last ones to board the plane. I couldn't do it, though. I turned around and walked off the plane. In that moment, I just couldn't do it. My poor husband.

I'd really like to be able to go. I'd like to be able to fly. I'd like to not hold Nick back.

I have to go to LA in December for work (on my freaking birthday). I'm debating whether or not I should fly. I feel like I'm strong enough to do it. It's a short flight. But I know when I get to the airport, it will be a struggle, so I don't know why I would do that to myself. Agh! But, yes, I would take this fear away if I could. That is the one thing that I would change.

Boom. Questions answered.

November 7 Q & A - Um, No

2012-11-07T20:13:00.003-08:00

Writing prompt for today:

Talk about the last compliment you received.

Oh, jeez, that would be very self-indulgent. Although, come to think of it, this whole blog is self-indulgent, right? And I guess what I am about to write about is self-indulgent as well, but whatever.

Like an idiot, I was listening to a radio show this morning with a couple of hosts that are clearly republicans. There are some segments of their show that I really enjoy, so I continue to listen. Also, I don't choose who I associate with based on their political preferences, and I can handle opposing viewpoints, so there's that too. One thing that has always bothered me about them, though, is that they espouse their personal ideas and opinions as if they are fact. Many of their listeners seem to have a difficult time making that distinction.

So people are calling today saying how upset they are that Obama was reelected, and I kid you not, many asked the talk show hosts what they should do. Should they leave the country? I'm not kidding. People wanted to know if they should move to a different country because they were so distraught that their candidate did not win.

Now, I get it. I literally told my husband yesterday, "Nick, I don't know what I'll do if Romney wins." To which he said something like, "life goes on" because my husband is not nearly as dramatic as I am. We all have our reasons for feeling the way we feel. For me, my heart would be sick knowing there was a man, a heartbeat away from the presidency, who refers to rape as a method of conception. Of course, there are other reasons, but I want to limit my obnoxiousness to the next paragraph and beyond.

One caller specifically called to ask the third host, a democrat, a question. Here is the question he posed to her: Since you're a liberal, when you have kids are you going to teach them to have responsibilities, do chores and earn their keep or are you going to give them handouts and give them whatever they want? He was serious. Because no liberals work, we all feel entitled to everything, and take handouts wherever we can get them, obviously. And these people are the same people who have the nerve to say that liberals are creating class warfare. It doesn't make sense to me. Callers, like the conservative hosts, were saying how liberals hate success; liberals resent successful people. Liberals will just continue not working and taking advantage of the successful people now that Obama has been reelected.

Let me tell you this - if you believe that the workforce is made up solely of republicans, you're an idiot. I'm sorry, but you are. I would like to be passive aggressive and suggest that maybe you're just misinformed, but I don't think that's the truth. If you truly think that all democrats sit on their asses taking handouts, feeling entitled, then you're a flipping ignoramous.

If you think that just because you've never needed a helping hand that no one else could ever possibly need one and be deserving of one, then I feel sorry for you. That way of thinking is very, very sad. It's important to keep in mind that one day, you'll be old. You'll probably be drawing on social security. Maybe you'll need medicare! Or, heaven forbid, something might happen to you in your 20s, 30s or 40s and you'll need to draw on state disability insurance. Or you might lose your job and have to collect unemployment insurance, temporarily, to help feed your family. Or you might experience age discrimination when you're older and won't be able to find a job lickety split. I could really go on and on, but my point is, dear radio hosts and callers, I think we should try putting ourselves in other people's shoes before making these broad generalizations.

November 6 Q & A - Winging It

2012-11-06T18:41:00.001-08:00

I'd rather not answer the writing prompt for today (if you were the president of the United States, what would be your first act in office?). Instead, let me entertain you with this:

Doug, the angry squirrel

Moose, the reluctant cow

These were my Halloween boys. The costumes didn't stay on too long, but 10 minutes worth of giggles makes it worth it. I love my sweet little squirrel and silly ol' cow.

PS - Our pumpkins were stolen off of our front porch! How rude!

PPS - Does anyone watch New Girl? Remember the episode where Jess tried to play it off like she invented "How Rude" a la Stephanie Tanner from Full House? Anyone? That show is hilarious.

November 5 Q & A - Election

2012-11-05T12:00:00.000-08:00

Writing prompt for today:

What are your thoughts about tomorrow's election?

Here's what I'll say: I hope that when all is said and done, the victor of the presidential election will have my parents' best interest in mind for the next four years. I hope that he will have my in-laws' best interest in mind, the rest of my family, my friends, my friends' families, my husband, people who are less fortunate that I am, women, gay people (or, as I like to call them: 'people'), the elderly, children, minorities, compassionate and open-minded people, Doug, Moose. I hope that he will not solely focus on what is best for older, white, affluent men. I think we need less of that and more of everything else.

November 2 Q & A - Where to Live?

2012-11-02T20:15:00.001-07:00

Writing prompt for today:

If you could live anywhere, where would it be?

I've thought about this many times. If I could live anywhere, I think I'd choose somewhere along the central coast of California, like Pismo Beach. This general area has such a laid back vibe, which I like very much. Also, the scenery is to die for. I could totally deal with having to look at the Pacific Ocean every day. In fact, wherever I moved, I would have to have a view of that dang ocean. Can you imagine?

A second runner up would be San Francisco, but it would have to be in the China Beach area, in a ridiculously affluent neighborhood. I'm talking affluent as in views of the Golden Gate Bridge from your living room window. I'm talking affluent as in mucho, mucho dinero.

And, of course, just for shits and giggles, I'll throw in Sausalito.

Can you tell I haven't been out of California much? I do love it here, though.

Where would you live?

November 1 Q & A - Favorite Quote

2012-11-01T12:00:00.000-07:00

I'm randomly back again. I have a lot to share from the past few months, but I don't feel like writing about any of that just yet. Rather, I came across writing prompts for the month of November, and it looks like fun! Yay, fun!

Before I get too much into it, though, it was brought to my attention that my blog has compatibility issues with Internet Explorer. Being that I only use Safari, I had no idea! And I have no idea how to fix it. I had been wanting to switch over to WordPress, so it seems like now is the perfect time. Or maybe not if I can fix this compatibility thing. I'm so indecisive. I guess my point is, if you read my blog on IE then I'm sorry everything has looked a mess. You have been so very polite for playing along this whole time; hopefully it will be fixed soon in one way or another.

But back to the point of this post. Here is the prompt for today:

Tell us your favorite quotation and why.

This kind of feels like deja vu. I might have written about this before, but I'm too lazy to check. In any case, what may have been my favorite quote before might not be my favorite quote now. That's the cool thing about quotes. Quotes have different meanings based on what you're going through at the moment. One of my all time favorite quotes is:

"For a long time it seemed to me that life was about to begin - real life. But there was always some obstacle in the way, something to be gotten through first, some unfinished business, time still to be served, a debt to be paid. At last it dawned on me that these obstacle were my life. This perspective has helped me to see there is no way to happiness. Happiness is the way. So treasure every moment you have and remember that time waits for no one. Happiness is a journey, not a destination." - Souza

(my Souza magnet)

There have been so many times in my life that I told myself my life would really start after this or after that. I think school is a perfect example. When I was in school, both times, I told myself how much greater things would be when I finished. Instead of enjoying my time learning, I looked forward to what was to come. But in reality, what came after was working full time and not using my degrees. Fun! And then there's the thought that when Nick and I have kids, as if that will ever happen, our life will really start. Which is just a stupid way to think.

This quote is a favorite because it's a constant reminder not to think like an idiot. I'm getting better, but I'm by no means there yet. Because wherever you go, there you are, right?

PS - Go Giants!

My Life in Sticky Notes

2012-07-11T21:20:00.001-07:00

Perhaps this is a completely idiotic post, but idiotic posts seem to be the most fun. I have a sticky note app for my phone, and I make very good use of it. I write lots of things down: randoms, reminders, instructions, names, books... you name it, I sticky note it.

Sometimes I will look something up over and over again, and I will finally decide to put it in my sticky note app for easy reference. Take my caffeine sticky, for example. I found myself repeatedly looking up caffeine levels in tea. I try to avoid caffeine. It's purely because I am a freak and for no other reason. When I can't have herbal or red tea, with no caffeine, I can look at my trusty sticky note and see that black tea has the most caffeine and should be avoided. Yay! How easy is that?

Digital sticky notes are also great when you're at the vet. Our vet recommended giving Moose Benadryl to ease his itchy skin when he needs it. It would be nearly impossible for me to remember this dosage without writing it down.

I kept dreaming of snakes, and the dreams were quite disturbing. I jotted them down so I could look up the meaning. One night, I had a dream that Doug and Moose had been bitten by a snake and were bleeding to death. It was fucking horrible. The next night I dreamed about a snake in my pillow case. You're dying to know what the snake in my dreams symbolized, huh? This site suggests that it is an, "expression of a strong discomfort, worry or... fear as you are being confronted with a challenging situation." That one seems appropriate, so I'm just going to go with it.

I occasionally hear names that I'd like for our pretend, completely hypothetical daughter. We've had our pretend son's name picked out for a long time, but we're undecided on a girl's name. Among many other names, I think Eleanor is cute.

Oh, dog shit! These little gems all happened to find their way out of my dad's mouth on a lovely Saturday morning this last May. My parents and I went to a community garage sale event in El Dorado Hills, and garage sales seem to wear out my dad's patience in a perfectly delightful and comedic way. If my dad didn't like what someone was selling? Dog shit! If someone's prices were too high? Rotten bastard! If someone was a complete douche bag? My dad didn't want his junk anyways!

I am a sucker for flowers. I love me some flowers. So it's no surprise that I write down flowers that I like. One day I will have a garden of pretty flowers. Or at least a few pots here and there filled with beautiful azaleas and black eyed susans.

That's a small sample of the sticky notes that I have. I like going through them for some weird reason, so thanks for listening. I'm sure I'll share more later.. whether you like it or not :)

Sunflower Inspiration

2012-07-04T18:39:00.000-07:00

To add to the list of things I love about my husband: he stopped to take a photo of a sunflower field on his way to work the other day. I hope he doesn't kill me for sharing that with the thousands of people who follow my blog. I think what I like most about this is that he really savored the moment. I can't count all the times I've driven past something thinking I should stop and take a picture of it. Nick actually had the balls to do it, and that inspires me.

Alcatraz

2012-06-30T00:00:00.003-07:00

I work for the state, and part of my job is to work the public information line for half a day once a week. I get to answer people's questions, listen to their frustrations, and act as a personal punching bag. And so today I was reminded of my all-time favorite incident working in customer service.

Photo: Source
When I was twenty-ish, I very briefly worked for a computer store as a customer service representative. My job was to greet customers as they came into the store, answer the phone, and, had I stayed long enough, input orders into the store's archaic point-of-sale system. Now, this software was not intuitive at all. Go figure for being a computer store, right? It wasn't like 'use the clearly labeled drop down menu and then double click here to place an order.' It was more like 'if you're lucky and accidentally press F4 you might be able to access the menu to the menu wherein you'll be asked to choose between pressing alt + shift and control + enter, but if you guess incorrectly the computer will freeze, make a sound like it's going to take off in flight, and then literally drop a deuce onto your shoes.'

And if you had only worked there a week and lacked any sort of introduction to the system, any sort of training on this software that was so lovingly named after an old-timey California prison, you were fucked. And so I was; I was thrown to the wolves.

One Saturday afternoon, the store was swamped. All the sales associates were busy with in-store customers when I received a phone call from a kind gentleman. He wanted to place a very large order. I very politely put him on hold and ran around begging and pleading with the sales associates to take five and assist this man. He was a sure thing! With money to spend! But no one wanted to take the time to help this very new employee place an order in which they were guaranteed a commission. I got back on the phone and kindly asked this sweet, sweet man if I could possibly take his name and number and someone would call him back. He assured me that if I did not take his order right then and there, the company I worked for would miss out on his very large, very profitable order.

With sweaty palms, I stood in front of that black screen and tried to maneuver my way around the system. There was a lot of awkward silence on the phone while I fumbled through the various screens. There was a lot of "thank you for your patience" and "did you say 5 3200 series with 2.66GHz Intel Pentium 4 505 processor, 256MB of RAM, and a 120GB hard drive or was that 3 5200 series with 3GHz Intel Pentium 4 530, a sack of potatoes, and a lighter?" I made no significant process with this man's order whatsoever because I did not know what the fuck I was doing. He, of course, took it as a personal insult. And so he asked me, and I will never forget, he asked, "what are you, a retard or something?" I'm not sure how the call ended. I truly have no recollection of how I was able to get this complete douchebag off the phone, but I remember going into the bathroom and crying my eyes out.

And I also remember quitting shortly thereafter.

Our Hairy Seamster

2012-06-14T11:53:00.000-07:00

Moose (not pictured) is so resourceful that he was able to update our boring, straight-edged bedspread with a delightful scalloped finish. He has such an eye for textiles!

Red Velvet, Schmed Schmelvet

2012-05-29T21:00:00.000-07:00

I have a confession. I hope you don't hold it against me.

Red velvet? Yeah, I just don't get it. It doesn't really taste like anything.
We had a BBQ today at work and someone brought red velvet cake. Everyone was like "ooooohhhh" and "yum" and "red velvet cake is so good." I gave it a go to be a good sport. Just like every other time before, though - nothing. I think my taste buds are deficient in being able to recognize what everyone else so lovingly lusts after. What is this flavor that we call red velvet?!?

Photo: Source
I know people think I am weird for loving such exotic flavors as banana, coconut and lemon. But I believe in equal opportunity. So, people, please tell me: what is it about red velvet?

Solar Eclipse of the Heart

2012-05-20T19:11:00.001-07:00

The solar eclipse is a major news story here. The news station is at a local science museum interviewing a number of kids.

News reporter to little boy: Can you tell us what an eclipse is?
Little boy: An eclipse... um... an eclipse is where the sun... um, I mean the moon... it's where the moon covers the sun. It looks like a fingernail.

News reporter to another little boy: Tell us about the eclipse you're going to see today.
Other little boy: You... you can only see it in eastern Asia and the western United States, where I am. It's like a smiley face covering the sun.
News reporter: So you've really been reading up on this, huh?

News reporter to little girl: Why is the eclipse so special to you?
Little girl: It's just so beautiful. I mean, it's like, so beautiful. Honestly, it makes me want to be an astronaut.

Photo: Source

Apparently, people are having solar eclipse parties, too. The news station is on location at an eclipse party in Granite Bay where people are getting toasted, throwing back some margaritas and playing around with their pin-hole cameras. It's actually pretty funny, and I think I'm going to steal the idea the next time a solar eclipse rolls around.

Even Doug wanted in on the action.

Doug: Pawing at the back door.
Me: Can you let him out, Nick? He wants to go see the solar eclipse.

You had to be there.

QOTW: March 25 - March 31, 2012

2012-03-31T11:55:00.003-07:00

"No matter where you go, there you are." - Confucius*

Photo: Source
*There's debate about the origin of this quote, so don't kill me if the attribution is incorrect.

Alive

2012-03-27T19:02:00.001-07:00

Something dawned on me today:

I am alive.

I should back up. About a month ago I started a blog post and never published it. It went something like this:

I've been in the mother-of-all-funks lately.

I have no desire to take care of myself. I have no desire to take care of my house. It's anyone's guess how I still manage to wear clean underwear on a daily basis. I'm sad all the time. I think I do a good job of hiding it, though. I am on the verge of tears all day, every day.

I usually cry on my way home from work. I have a somewhat lengthy commute home, so I have a lot of time to think about things. Music makes me cry. Don't even play This Year's Love by David Gray or I Won't Give Up by Jason Mraz in my presence. It won't be pretty. I tried to start reading A Stolen Life by Jaycee Lee Dugard during my lunch break today. I had to stop at the dust jacket, because, you know, bawling uncontrollably at work is not all it's cracked up to be.

You can see why I didn't publish it. My mom would have taken it as a giant cry for help and would have called me in two seconds flat. Besides, I never finished it, so there's that, too.

In any case, I told myself today that I AM ALIVE. I might not be able to have babies and as soul-crushing as that may be, at least I am alive.

I am alive and can experience all the good things life has to offer. We've lost a few loved ones in the recent months. They can no longer spend time with their loved ones. They can no longer see their loved ones grow and flourish. They can no longer take advantage of all of the good things life has to offer. And here I am taking my life for granted.

Changing my thinking is not going to be automatic. Not knowing if we will ever have kids, with odds that are so stacked against us, is still devastating in a way most people will never be able to comprehend. I still cry easily. It's a very sensitive topic for me.

But if I can remind myself of this, of the fact that I am alive, I hope that it will be easier for me to cope and easier for me to enjoy all the good things.

Photo: Source

QOTW: March 18 - March 24, 2012

2012-03-21T20:34:00.003-07:00

"You wanna fly, you got to give up the shit that weighs you down." - Toni Morrison

Photo: Source

A Couple of Things...

2012-03-17T11:09:00.002-07:00

I wonder what it says about me when I go missing from my blog for a month and a half?

And I still owe you three days from January's photo-a-day challenge.

But what I really want to say is:

1. It's such a shame that David Gray's This Year's Love was played out on the worst season ever of The Bachelor. Such a goddamn shame. A waste, really. It's such a beautiful song.

2. I heard Tomorrow, a Silverchair song, on the radio the other day. It reminded me of middle school and how much I hated the lyric:

"You say that money, isn't everything,

But I'd like to see you live without it."

Don't ask me why, but it always got under my skin.

Which reminds me of other lyrics that I f-ing hate.

"Me not working hard? Yeah right, picture that with a Kodak."

- Pitbull, Give Me Everything (Tonight)

My rule is that if I could have written the lyric, it sucks. (That's not entirely true considering I do love me some Britney Spears.)

This one takes the cake, though:

"Nobody seldom made me feel the way that you do."

- Enrique Iglesias, Tonight (I'm Lovin' You)

This one hurts my brain. How does NOBODY seldom make you feel a certain way? I just don't get it. Can someone explain it to me? I can understand if other people seldom make him feel this way or no one ever makes him feel this way, but how does NOBODY seldom make him feel this way? How are you seldom made to feel a certain way by nobody? I just don't fucking get it. I DON'T GET IT, and it hurts my brain to think about it.

I Kinda Want a Hot Dog

2012-01-27T16:19:00.000-08:00

I don't know if either of these top the first one I already shared, but they're still pretty funny. I hope they keep cranking them out because it's kinda like I'm laughing at myself.

Shit Girls Say - Episode 2

Shit Girls Say - Episode 3

And, by the way, isn't Juliette Lewis gorgeous?

Day 27: Lunch

2012-01-27T12:01:00.000-08:00

Day 27, January 27, 2012:

LUNCH

Because I'm home sick today I'm able to dine on an unusual mix of leftovers for lunch. My plate consists of black bean and tortilla bake from Wednesday night and potatoes and carrots from the Crock-Pot chicken dinner I put together yesterday morning before learning I had bronchitis and a temperature. Yay for germs!

And I washed it down with a nice glass of milk.

Photo-A-Day Challenge: Day 1 - 6, Day 7, Day 8, Day 9, Day 10, Day 11, Day 12, Day 13, Day 14, Day 15, Day 16, Day 17, Day 18, Day 19, Day 20, Day 21 - 22, Day 23 - 24, Day 25, Day 26

Day 26: Color

2012-01-26T13:06:00.000-08:00

Day 26, January 26, 2012:

COLOR

Pink.

Pink is the color of the pajama pants I put on when I got home from learning that I have bronchitis. Yes, I was diagnosed with bronchitis during my second week of my new job. Nothing says awesome new employee like having to leave work early for a doctor's appointment and then to be subsequently written out for two days for bronchitis with a fever over 100 degrees. Let this be a lesson to everyone: if you have a cold that's lasted a month and a half, it's probably not a cold. It's like you'd think I had a penis for having waited that long to go to the doctor.

And, yes, I am wearing two different socks and one is inside out.

Photo-A-Day Challenge: Day 1 - 6, Day 7, Day 8, Day 9, Day 10, Day 11, Day 12, Day 13, Day 14, Day 15, Day 16, Day 17, Day 18, Day 19, Day 20, Day 21 - 22, Day 23 - 24, Day 25

Day 25: Something You Made

2012-01-25T19:57:00.000-08:00

Day 25, January 25, 2012:

SOMETHING YOU MADE

This doesn't look very appetizing, but it sure tastes good. It's white chicken chili with rice. I didn't make it today, though. I made it for dinner last night and ate the leftovers today for lunch. Sorry, that's as close as I'm going to get for making something today unless you count making piles of paperwork, a reference binder or reservations for a sewing class. Because I made all those things today, too.

Photo-A-Day Challenge: Day 1 - 6, Day 7, Day 8, Day 9, Day 10, Day 11, Day 12, Day 13, Day 14, Day 15, Day 16, Day 17, Day 18, Day 19, Day 20, Day 21 - 22, Day 23 - 24

Day 23 & 24: Something Old and Guilty Pleasure

2012-01-24T19:23:00.000-08:00

Day 23, January 23, 2012:

SOMETHING OLD

My friend Sheri gave me this necklace years and years and years ago. I wear it nearly every day. It's cute and it has sentimental value. The engraving on the back has all but worn off, but I know a dear friend gave it to me and that's all I need to know.

Day 24, January 24, 2012:

GUILTY PLEASURE

You'll have to ignore Doug in this photo. He sees ice cream, so nothing else in the world exists to him. My guilty pleasure... er, one of my guilty pleasures is sweets. Anything with sugar in it is A-OK in my book. This is a 100 calorie Skinny Cow White Mint Truffle ice cream bar. A Snickers candy bar also sounds good to me and, for that matter, so does a gooey cinnamon roll. Sure I feel guilt with each and every sweet I eat, but now I live my life by the directive of this fortune cookie: "Be good to yourself. Dessert three times per week is OK."

Photo-A-Day Challenge: Day 1 - 6, Day 7, Day 8, Day 9, Day 10, Day 11, Day 12, Day 13, Day 14, Day 15, Day 16, Day 17, Day 18, Day 19, Day 20, Day 21 - 22

QOTW: January 22 - January 28, 2012

2012-01-22T18:59:00.000-08:00

"I'll tell you this: the first 6 months, I was SO relaxed. I was Al Bundy, hands down my pants while sippin a brewsky and watching TV, relaxed. Guess what? That didn't make me pregnant! I know, hard to believe, right?" - Jen Knepper

Photo: Source
I've been reading Jen's blog since before Nick and I were even trying to conceive. I remember thinking how awful it must be for a woman who wants to have children to struggle to get pregnant. I remember thinking that I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy. And here I am! Yay!

Jen's quote is from a post she did on what people said to her while she was trying to get pregnant. Like, the above was in response to people telling her to "just relax." I've gotten that one more times than I care to admit. I actually had someone tell me that "it's been proven" that if you just relax and don't stress about it, you'll get pregnant. I was pretty relaxed for that whole year and a half I was off birth control before we even started trying and that didn't work, so WTF, proven science?

Day 21 & 22: Reflection and Shoes

2012-01-22T14:12:00.000-08:00

Day 21, January 21, 2012:

REFLECTION

You won't believe how much I fretted yesterday over the thought that I had to do a reflection photo. I pictured myself standing in front of a mirror taking a photo of me taking a photo of myself. Annoying. But today it occurred to me that the prompt isn't necessarily a photo of MY reflection. So this one is another cheat photo. I took it a few years ago behind our house in the nature preserve. Right now it looks like a g-darn mess back there, but in the spring, when this was taken, it's beautiful.

Day 22, January 22, 2012:

YOUR SHOES

If I were going somewhere today I'd probably be wearing these sneakers. They're old and they're dirty, but they're super comfortable. I got them for zip lining before our Mexico trip way back when, and I've been loving them ever since.

Photo-A-Day Challenge: Day 1 - 6, Day 7, Day 8, Day 9, Day 10, Day 11, Day 12, Day 13, Day 14, Day 15, Day 16, Day 17, Day 18, Day 19, Day 20

New

2012-01-21T14:37:00.000-08:00

Lord knows I'm good at jinxing things, so I've avoided saying anything until now. (Spoiler alert: I'm not pregnant. This post is not about a pregnancy.) I started a new job this week. I wish I could say it's a library job, but it's not. It's just as well, though. I'm happy with the move that I made.

I was with my last company for seven years. One thing that I had forgotten was how it felt to be the new person. There's that slightly nervous, somewhat uncomfortable feeling you get when you're new to an organization. You don't know the people, you're not familiar with how the company operates, and you aren't sure if you're allowed to hang stuff on your office walls or if you have to ask someone to do it for you. This week I thought back to how it felt to move to California when I was in the third grade. Back then, I had the same feelings. Imagine being in a new school, in a new town, where there's fog and seagulls and multiplication tables, and everything is a great departure from what you're used to. In Arizona there's heat and clear skies and cactus. I truly felt like the odd man out in Sacramento. Albeit, my third grade transition was much more difficult and much more emotional; I cried a lot and I constantly wanted to be by my mom's side. This time, I still want to be by my mom's side, but I have the understanding that everything gets better. Everything gets easier. Everything gets more familiar and routine.

Starting something new has made me realize that as great as I thought I was with change, I'm not. Don't get me wrong, I think I'm pretty adaptable. I can go with the flow and make the best of it. The feelings associated with the change are what surprised me. Sure, I knew I'd be nervous, but the uncomfortableness of it all caught me off guard. I realize now that I'm good with little changes, but sweeping, drastic changes probably aren't my forte. The challenge is to get over the new girl hump. And I can do it. It's just a matter of time, and I'm glad that I know that.

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