My Thorns Have Roses

An Open Letter to the Tooth Fairy

2012-08-26T21:24:00.001-07:00

Dearest Most Glorious Fairy of the Teeth-

I write to you today

on behalf of my

8-year-old-daughter.

I'm sure you remember her.

Natalie??

My Princess??

You've given a sizeable contribution

to her special lost tooth coinpurse

over the past couple of years.

And you probably know by now

that Natalie is such a sweet girl.

With a giving spirit and not many requests for much in life.

[other than love and snuggles.]

She has never once complained

when you show up late ~~all the time~~ sometimes

or when you've jipped her a few coins here and there.

[how were you to remember that sister got 25 cents more for the little tooth to left of the other little tooth?]

Heck.

She didn't even get frustrated with you

when you gave her "buckies" in place of the original little nibblets of teeth

she had in the first place.

She's been rocking the big beautiful gap-toothed look

for awhile now

and her beauty has never failed to radiate.

She's been grateful all along to YOU for her killer smile

her pearly whites

and her double dimps.

[so what if she hasn't studied genetics yet.]

She's quite sure YOU'VE been helping to watch out for her all these years.

Keeping her smile all aglow and the such.

You've kept my girl feeling pretty satisfied and confidant

and for that

I want to thank you.

But today

we have some serious business on our hands.

Natalie lost some teeth this past weekend.

And by lost -

I really mean...

tragically cracked in half during a freak accident

in a gymnastics flip-attempt

involving

her face and our hardwood floors.

The hardwood floors won.

So I'm writing today

in order to request an increase

in payment for

these two "lost" teeth.

[they are permanent teeth, after all.]

I don't think $1/tooth is going to cut it this time.

I know you work hard.

And I know you have a lot of littles to gift your coins

[for lost teeth]

all around the world.

But

if you could spare just a few extra

this time.

I know one little lady that would really appreciate it.

oh. and we'll be needing those teeth back this time. we're hoping they can be re-attached.

Thanks

dearest

Tooth Fairy.

Sincerely-

Natalie's Mom

*********************************************************

Thanks for all the love and prayers and well wishes

good vibes and karma and thoughts

sent Nat's way this weekend.

She knows she's loved

and she's been a
CHAMPION

this weekend

holding up through this ordeal.

We'll have more updates after we visit the

real tooth magician

THE DENTIST

first thing Monday morning.

*********************************************************

Let's Go On A Diet

2012-08-23T20:34:00.003-07:00

Not a fad diet
though.

[Like the Atkins Diet]

It's really more of a
lifestyle change.

I think we should all go on

this new diet.

I've dubbed it

The "Akins" Diet.

Instead of shedding
pounds

together we'll shed the world

of
one

at a time.

Experts say it's
unwise & unhealthy
to lose more than
1-2 ~~pounds~~ losers/week
so this week
we'll just shed 2.

Starting with the namesake of this new lifestyle change.

#1.

The "Legitimate" Shed

[source]

Yep.
Todd
"I'm a Member of the Congressional House SCIENCE Committee
But Still Somehow Manage to Not Comprehend Basic Biology"
Akin.

Let's get him voted out.

I have a suggestion for his new job.*

[ CRASH TEST DUMMY. ouch.]

Once

there was this

scuzzy politician

who

got into an accident

.
.
.

But no worries-

Mr. Akin.

I hear in "legitimate" crash tests

nobody dies.

************************************************************************

#2.

Eat Less Chikin

[source]

"BEEF" : It's What's For Dinner
or
Eat More Kale

Hey.
I'm not mad at the guy for asserting his first amendment rights.

[um. here i am. doing the same.]

I'm not even mad at people who love CFA's chicken sandwiches that continue to eat there.

[although i was never very fond of the food in the first place.]
I'm not mad at you if you make it a point to spend your hard earned dollars eating chicken
to support free speech.
[i'm more of the raise my own chickens and feed them to hungry people type of gal myself]

I am annoyed
however
that people supported/are supporting the restaurant

in mass swarms

and doing so
supposedly

in the defense of

FREE SPEECH

when really

they just want to defend
the

POSITION OF DAN CATHY.
Let's call things what they are.
Chicken shit = chikin shit
(even if it also = bull.shit)

Just don't try to trick me, peeps.

[I'm looking at you Iowa GOP. I'll pass on the CFA gift card. Mmk? Thanks.]

Next time I want some chicken and pickles

I'll go somewhere else

or
somewhere else
[hah]
or

make my own.

Dan Cathy-
you said you support
traditional [legal] marriages.

With all your new stardom
I think you'd make a perfect officiant
for celebrity weddings.
You know.
the legitimate, sacred, and perfect ones.

Let's start here.*

[legal marriages rock!]

******************************************************

Hopefully we'll be able to shed a few more ~~pounds~~ losers soon.

Any nominations?

******************************************************

* It should be noted that this was written for comedic purposes and not as any real statement of threat or wish of harm upon either of these ~~gentlemen~~ men. No one should have to suffer through an entire Avril/Nickelback wedding.

Milkshake Brings All My Kids To The Schoolyard

2012-08-21T19:58:00.000-07:00

What I mean to say is that
my kiddos and I
love
the band
MILKSHAKE.
[not to be confused with that other song]

For my obligatory
STAR OF THE WEEK
post
this week
I want to feature
***3 little stars***

Yes.
Again.
My kiddos.
Who went back to school this week.
Who each make me proud to be their mama.

They are uniquely special and adorable in all their own ways.

This post is for them.

(Featuring lyrics from one of our favorite rock n' roll bands)

[censored rock bands that is]

MILKSHAKE

and their hit song

[at least with the kids in my house]

"SCHOOL"

from the 2004 album

BOTTLE OF SUNSHINE.

****************

I really love the weekends.

I do a lot of things.

[Izzy at her Great-Aunt's 50th Birthday Party]

I like to go out walking
and think up songs to sing.

[Nat & I before a lil walk together. We are also planning a Turtle Tots Talent Show together as well.]

I got a backyard filled with all my toys.

I run around and make a lot of noise.

[me and the j man headed out for some school shopping. he's thrilled. can't you tell?]

but I can’t wait to get back to school.

[1st grade superstar.]

No matter what other kids say
I have a lot of fun.

[3rd grade fun starter.]

When we’re learning things here at school.

[love it.]

I bet anyone can see we have a lot of fun.

I have really great teachers

who are never ever mean.

I know NY and California

and all the states between.

[that's my line. ;P]

I can tell you all the colors of the RAINBOW.

[he has faithful and adoring fans. ]

I understand just what makes the moon glow.

[the sun's reflection, mother. duh.]

I’m not saying it’s easy -

you know there are times...

When I’d rather not read, write or memorize.

[Isabel with her best friend.]

But I love music, math and art.

[clearly so does Mona Lisa Kudrow]

Putting things together

[siblings]

taking them apart.

[leaving us.]

****

The best part about my new job??

Getting to walk to pick up these amazing little people everyday after school.

****

Rock. On.

Good Times In Missouri

2012-08-20T16:43:00.001-07:00

Last Saturday's trip to

Kansas City, Missouri

where Ryan and I participated

in an aquaponics workshop

hosted by

Jason

from

The Urban Farming Guys

was

MEMORABLE

indeed

for plenty of reasons.

[A certain Missouri politician and I would most assuredly disagree how to define "welfare of the people".]

[driving into the neighborhood where the course was being held]

Eating delicious BBQ Chicken.
[right after spending quality time with live ones]
We were lucky to have the opportunity to meet the owner of
Gates & Sons BBQ
a fantastic little eatery
that employs a friendly and gregarious waitstaff.
{Hi, may I help you?!}

The food was awesome & Mr. Gates' establishment got two thumbs up from this girl
when he said he really liked Ron Paul {Happy Bday R. Peezy} and a lot of his philosophies!!

Thanks Gates BBQ for a great dining experience!

[a memorable street, indeed.]

my favorite part of the entire trip
happened in a rest stop parking lot
while ryan and i discussed how dumb we were
to forget the top of our tent
when
but of course
it was raining.

we knew we were committed to a long drive home

and not much was working

as far as lifting our spirits.

until we saw this.

this guy.

[i only captured the shimmy of his rumba moves. which were pretty sweet.]

I wish I had been video recording what was happening in the picture above.

we saw this man

get out of his car

and proceed to

DANCE

CRAZY

in front of his

teenage daughters.

His smooth rumba moves

up and down the parking lot

and in front of his girls' car door

were amazing

no.doubt.

but nothing compared

to when he started to

do a lil of this

at their door.

no joke.

then a little bit of this went down.

and tears are rolling down my face from watching him from afar now.

and i assume his daughters are beyond mortified at this point.

until.

one of them gets out and starts doing this:

If I hadn't just used the facilities - I would have peed my pants watching this family.

Spirits.Lifted.

We had the energy now [thank you laughter] to get us through the drive.

And now I vote that every road trip

in our future

[especially the ones that involve our eye-rolling children]

include

a little bit of this:

It'll be great.

******************************************************

Anybody have any good Missouri stories?

What gets you through a long drive?

******************************************************

Let it Grow

2012-08-19T19:04:00.000-07:00

I have

farming & growing things

in my blood.

My great-grandfather

[Myron Stonewall. Who is also apparently one of the Rulers of Phlan. hah.]

and his family were farmers.

[just me. and some chickens.]

My great-grandmother was an avid gardener well into her 90's.

[not my gran's work. saw this at the fair. am now inspired to make little fairy worlds myself. so cute.]

My grandparents on my mother's side spent much of their time

devoted to growing and maintaining their flower beds.

[another cute scene from mini plants seen at the fair. adorbs.]

My dad's parents had a beautiful backyard

filled with growth and splendor when I was little.

[i want to grow this. it's a true thing of beauty. an outdoor lettuce art/path/garden as seen on Pinterest]

My parents have always had an amazing vegetable garden

and have recently spent a lot of effort outdoors

in creating a beautiful space full of green goodness and pops of color.

[a portion of my parents' backyard]

I fell in love

with a

wannabe-urban-gardening-gangsta

who had just begun to hone in on his own gardening skills

several years ago now...

[me and the man. summer of 2010.]

and we have been building a life around

plants and produce.

Most of my memories of tending

to the gardens

of my childhood

include doing so as a chore

without much pleasure involved.

And while I've always been able to appreciate

the fresh flowers on the table

or the surplus of veggies a garden can provide

...actually digging in the dirt

and planning what to plant

and tending to the needs of the growing things

hasn't been something I've been able to devote much time to

mostly because I've been pursuing

other areas of interest.

...

Until.Now.

[grown-ups converse with chickens all the time.]

I've always said

I believe the children are our future.

[we saw this at the Iowa State Fair and have decided we NEED one of our own.]

While I haven't been doing much of the actual growing

of our gardens personally

the past couple of growing seasons

-I have found my own way to

nuture growth.

[Ryan saw these competitive mammoth Sunflower heads at the fair and is determined to compete soon.]

If not in

plant form

then in the active development

babies and children

whom I love dearly.

[bowling ball bees seen at the fair. another must re-create project my tots can help with.]

The past couple of years

Ryan and I have really been seeking out

a future career

for the both of us

that somehow marries the concepts

of helping to provide care for growing children

while also having time to devote to growing produce.

[love this bench]

We've tossed several ideas around

and it wasn't until this past weekend that we really

felt like we nailed

just

exactly

what path we've been

searching and dreaming

in our hearts of following.

[it will definitely involve chickens as I now know I can speak their clucking language fluently.]

We truly desire to be productive

in making our world

a better place to live in.

[some artwork painted on the side of a trailer on the KC, MO urban farm we visited.]

The inspiration for our future plans

comes from a combination

of many years of dreaming and planning

and

our recent trip to the Iowa State Fair

and

our even more recent trip to an aquaponics workshop

in Kansas City, MO

held by

The Urban Farming Guys.

and

coming home and watching

The Lorax.

[if you haven't already-please watch this. so good.]

[i realize this is Horton (and not the Lorax). saw this dyed and colored rice artwork at the fair and fell in love.]

A few posts ago I mentioned that

we have such a great desire to get out on some land

and then perhaps after our own children are grown

and out of the house

[i was a young mommy remember]

become foster parents

and build a space for those in need

to feel safe and loved

while being surrounded by immense beauty.

While that sounds and IS an amazing dream

and one we very well might pursue at a later time in our lives -

what we'd really like to do

with our lives

right.now

is find a house with enough land

in the city

and combine a small daycare

with a

non-profit growing organization

which would grow food, produce, and fresh flowers

for those in need.

[pics from Saturday's aquaponics course. on the middle right we're with Jason The Urban Farming Guy]

Right now all we can do

to move forward with our dream vision

is to

plan

save

and seek out assistance.

We're not sure of all

the in's and out's

of creating and running

a non-profit

food growing organization

out of our backyard

[which we haven't even purchased yet]

but we're

bound and determined

to make this vision

reality.

********************************************

“Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot,
Nothing is going to get better.

It's not.”

~Dr. Suess

********************************************