Nameless Traveler

Full Circle

2017-05-22T15:02:00.001-07:00

Tomorrow, I start studying for the bar which means many more hours in the library for the next couple of months. Still, I wanted to take a moment to express my gratitude and to reflect on what has happened in my life.

Seven years ago, my lawyer told me to go to law school. On May 20, 2017 I walked across a stage and received my law degree after three years of very hard work. I will not pretend to be able to articulate what it all means, so I will borrow from something my mom said as we celebrated with friends and family. She handed my wife a bouquet of green and yellow flowers and she told her that none of this would have been possible without her.

Truer words were never spoken. 

I would be a fool to think that I have accomplished any of this on my own. Getting me to and through law school was a team effort. Regardless of what happens from this day on, I am forever indebted my beautiful wife, Shannon. Not only did she agree to this law school thing, but she has made it her mission to support me every single day in more ways than I can even name. I am humbled by her dedication to our little family. Law school has meant putting our lives on hold, going into debt, and countless hours of hard work. She never complained, and she has not even allowed me to second-guess this decision.   

I am also grateful to my parents, Joel and Rosa Duran. They provided the foundation and the guidance that has allowed me to get where I am today. 

I am grateful to my beautiful daughter Anaya. Even at her tender age, she is perceptive and she knows that "daddy's school" has been a big part of our lives. One day, I hope she understands that I did it for her. 

There are many others that could be named in this post. Extended family, friends, fellow graduates, professors, mentors, teachers, and even detractors. Thank you all!

Besides finishing law school, the past few weeks have brought other important changes to our lives. If you are new to this blog, you should know that I started it to share my experiences as a Mexican immigrant in the U.S. You can go back and read through posts about the process that it took for me to become a legal permanent resident after almost 20 years of living in the country as an undocumented immigrant. On May 17th, several days before graduating law school, I became an American citizen. 
All of this began in the immigration law offices of Raquel Hecht. Not only did she take my immigration case, but she also encouraged me to do something that I never thought was possible. Law school was not on my radar when I walked into her office 7 years ago, but that changed when she looked at me and said, "You should go to law school." A life changing moment, and one that has motivated me to work hard and to continue to be an advocate for those who need it. Thank you, Raquel. 

También me gustaría mandar un saludo especial a mi familia en Mexico y en otros lugares. Quiero que sepan que siempre están en mi mente y en mi corazón. Los quiero mucho y los extraño mas de lo que puedo expresar. Todos ustedes son parte de lo que acabo de lograr porque forman parte de la persona que soy. Reciban un fuerte abrazo de nosotros. Esperamos verlos muy pronto.

From Tulancingo, Hidalgo Mexico to Eugene, Oregon; we have come full circle.

Full Circle

One Year Later

2012-04-29T11:34:00.000-07:00

Yesterday marked the anniversary of my return from Mexico. I can't believe how fast time has gone by, yet so much has happened in the past year. A new status, a new career path, and an upcoming arrival. Things around us change all the time, but God remains constant in His grace towards us.

Several weeks ago when my wife and I realized that the anniversary was approaching, we mentioned doing something to celebrate. We got busy with other things, and nothing came of it. This week both my brothers had their birthdays, so we had a little family get-together last night. Before that, we headed to Autzen Stadium in Eugene for the Ducks' annual Spring Game. Basically, it was the perfect day.

Oregon weather being what it is, you never know what to expect. When we left our house, it felt like it was going to be a cold, rainy day. As you can see by the picture that wasn't the case. Because admission is free, we got to sit in seats that we can only dream of being in.

The fans have been really great these past few seasons, and these spring games have become great events. There is a fan festival before the game, and they have a canned food drive for a local food bank.

Several years ago the game became a way to honor the troops. They had a flyover for this game, and watching those jets fly over game me goosebumps.The sounds those planes make is incredible. There was a flag ceremony, a moment of silence, jersey exchange with the troops, and a re-enlistment ceremony. Oh, and there was also a football game too.


Jersey exchange with the troops

I say all of that to say this; somewhere between the national anthem and the flyover I had a moment where I had to stop and be thankful for everything that I had. I had forgotten about the anniversary, but it popped into my head at that exact moment. One year ago I became I Permanent Resident of the United States of America.

To top off the day, we headed to my parents' house to celebrate my brothers' birthdays. It was mostly family members in their. We laughed, we talked, we ate, we played music, we ate some more, and we had a great time all-around.

Mamacita: a poem

2011-12-30T10:28:00.000-08:00

This was a poem that I read in a literature class. I had an instant connection with it because it is my story, and it is the story of so many people around me. I think it is a powerful statement about the immigrant's experience in America.

MAMACITA

by Margaret S. Mullins

mamacita, mamacita
grab those babies
and run for the border
swim across the river
walk through the desert
hold tight the babies
take the first job
cleaning the toilets
and then the second
vacuuming offices
sleep with the babies
work on the weekends
washing dishes
at the tex-mex place
where they let you eat
take in others' kids
whose mamas work nights
tuck them in bed with you
snuggle them tight
take them to free clinics
feed them tortillas
send them to school
to learn how to read
shop at the thrift store
go to the library
play at the green park
watch them grow strong
watch them grow smart
watch them start college
call their grandma at home
but don't cross back over
your babies are here
and they need you now
to hug them tight
as they fill out the papers
that make them point blame
at you who brought them
and taught them to love
the nation that says
they should never have come

I am America

2011-12-16T03:16:00.000-08:00

There are times when I find it hard to relate to certain issues. When people are discussing things like retirement, Social Security, and property taxes I find it hard to sympathize because I don't have a personal connection with those issues. I am no where near retirement age, Social Security is also far away, and I have no property that can be taxed. I have found others are the same way with issues that are important to me.

I understand the difficulty in relating to something that you don't have a personal connection with. It would be like worrying about somebody that you don't know. That is why I have this blog. Immigration is an issue that is very important to me, and I want to do everything I can to make the people around me aware of what is going on.

Everyday millions of people are denied the opportunity of becoming American residents. These are people that have a strong work ethic and solid family values. The desire for a better life has driven them to come into the country illegally. They work the jobs that many are not willing to do, and they are forced to live in the shadows of society. They are treated unfairly, and the labels that others have placed on them make them seem less than human.

States like Alabama and Arizona have violated their Constitutional limitations to enact strict anti-immigrant policies that have bordered on outright racism. Both of their attempts have been challenged by federal courts, and the Supreme Court is reviewing Arizona's law as I type this. I won't be the person that compares these policies to Nazi Germany, but can't stay silent when my people are being treated unfairly.

In Arizona there is a man who calls himself "America's Toughest Sheriff." That man is Joseph Arpaio, Maricopa County Sheriff since 1993. If I were to label Mr. Arpaio, I would change his moniker to "America's Most Racist Sheriff." His actions during his term are nothing short of appalling. Mr. Arpaio is currently being investigated by the U.S. Department of Justice for his treatment of Latinos in Maricopa County. There are reports of raids motivated by skin color, as well as mistreatment of Latino prisoners in the county jail.

I find it hard to believe that He has been in office for so long, especially when I read those allegations about him. Even when he defends himself Mr. Arpaio cannot help but sound inhumane and bigoted. From the San Francisco Chronicle, "He said the decision by Homeland Security to sever ties will result in illegal immigrants being released from jail and large numbers. They will go undetected and be "dumped on a street near you. For that, you can thank the federal government," the sheriff said."

Dumped on a street near you? Are we garbage to you, Mr. Arpaio? Just because someone does not have the "right papers" does not give you the right to think of them as less than yourself. These words are just a small sample of the things that Mr. Arpaio allows and condones in his department.

Mr. Arpaio. You say tough, I say racist

I could go on an on about what this man has said and done during his time as sheriff, but I wont. I will, however, leave you with one interesting fact about Mr. Arpaio: his parents were Italian immigrants. Ah, l'ironia! (Oh, the irony!)

Then we have the federal government. Their actions can be more aptly described as in-actions. Presidential candidates have promised an overhaul to the broken immigration policy in this country. Not one of them has done anything significant about it when they are elected. After a while, you get the sense that they are merely pandering to the Latino voters with their words, but in reality they are playing political games.

Earlier this year the Obama administration made a policy change having to do with the deportation of undocumented immigrants. If an individual was arrested they would only be deported if they had a criminal record, or if they were repeat offenders. I was glad to hear the the White House was doing its part to make the system work a little better for people who were trying to do the right thing. Unfortunately, it was too good to be true.

I read about Liliana Ramos, a woman who was deported after living in the U.S. for twenty-one years. She was separated from her three children, and taken to country that is almost completely foreign to her. She tried to do the right thing, and she was essentially punished for it. When she brought up the policy change to the immigration officers they told her that it was just politics. I have learned that there is a difference between what politicians say and what politicians do. President Obama is no exception. Deportations have actually increased since he was elected.

A change has to be made. The system does not work, for anybody. I have no problem with securing the border. I have no problem with deporting dangerous criminals, or with the law being enforced, but I want something in return. Fix the immigration system. Everyone should have to chance to know what it means to be an American, not just live in America.

I know this is a long post, and I am having a hard time figuring out how to conclude this essay. I will leave you with a poem I read in a literature class. It was written by an African American poet named Langston Hughes. Even though he was wrote from an African American point of view, I cannot help but relate.

I, Too

I, too, sing America.

I am the darker brother.
They send me to eat in the kitchen
When company comes,
But I laugh,
And eat well,
And grow strong.

Tomorrow,
I'll be at the table
When company comes.
Nobody'll dare
Say to me,
"Eat in the kitchen,"
Then.

Besides, 
They'll see how beautiful I am
And be ashamed--

I, too, am America.

~Langston Hughes

Occupy Your Brain

2011-11-22T14:12:00.000-08:00

The time has come for me to respond. I have sat and watched this Occupy movement for some time now, not really saying much of anything- until now. Personally, I am getting tired of hearing about it, so I thought writing about it would give me some closure. Just thinking about it makes my head hurt. It's not that I am completely against the movement either. It is not that simple.

Looking at it objectively, the Occupy Wall Street movement has the right idea: the ordinary person taking on the corrupt system that controls everything. It's clear that the ordinary man wants change and the ordinary man will stand up for what he believes in. It is like the Protestant Reformation. In the year 1517 Martin Luther walked up to All Saint's Church in Wittenberg, Germany and nailed his Ninety-Five Theses to the door. (Occupy the Catholic Church) There are also similarities to the Civil Rights era, when African Americans stood up and marched against the injustices to which they were being subjected. The list goes on.

All these movements have something in common; they identify a social problem, and they express their displeasure with it. Luther pointed out the corruption that had infected the Roman Catholic Church; his Ninety-Five Theses were his solutions. Civil Rights leaders like Martin Luther King saw the unfair way that African Americans were being treated by the majority, and fought for equal rights. Occupy Wall Street is a group of people that are tired of the greed and corruption that plague our society. They have effectively pointed this out. They have our attention. We would have to be blind and heartless to disagree that the system is broken and in need of repair.

Yet, the question remains: What do you want to do about it? Please give us a clear and definite answer so we can at least have a discussion. As a movement, you have made valid points. Our economy has suffered because greedy people have abused their power, and now the house of cards they created is falling. The ordinary person is left paying for it.

Whatever the solution may be, blowing up the system is not the answer. Capitalism may not be perfect, but at the end of the day, it is by far the best economic system we have. It is vulnerable because of people's greed, but that is an inevitability because humans are in control. Any time there is a human being at the wheel, there is the possibility of error. That is what happened here. A few greedy people took advantage of the situation.

The truth of that matter is that the "system" is just too big. There is no way that it can be stopped. The government can't stop it because government is in the back pocket of these corporations. Neither political party has an answer. If you like take a look at these websites which list some of the biggest donors to the Obama campaign and to the McCain campaign in 2008. If you don't have to time to look, let me just tell you that some of the biggest contributors to political campaigns are the giant Wall Street corporations that are considered so evil. Therefore, we cannot rely on government intervention here, because that would be a case of biting the hand that feeds you.

Do the Occupiers want the "rich" to give them their money? Wouldn't this make them just as bad as the rich people? What motivation do the rich people have for giving away their money? I know I say this a lot, but I have to clarify that I am not an economics major. Yet, I cannot agree with the notion that rich people don't pay taxes. I have met several "rich" people in my time, and when they have shared with me the amount of money they have to pay in taxes, I am astounded. Aside from that, if they want to keep more of their money from the government they have to jump through a million little hoops. The media makes it seem like these hoops keep them from paying taxes at all, but that is just not the case.

People like to point out that corporations don't pay taxes. I don't know enough to say anything one way or another, but consider this. Corporations create job for many people. Those people pay, and they are consumers in the economy. That creates more jobs, which creates more tax revenue. I am sure that many people would consider my ideas naive, but I believe my point of view is not extreme.

The media has done a good job of creating a bad guy in this situation. You see, we are always looking for a scapegoat. Throughout history anti-Semitic movements have blamed the Jews for a million things. The Salem Witch Trials are another example of people trying to find the responsible party for a problem that cannot be easily explained. That is why we have the term witch-hunt.
(Those don't always work out so well.) In this case, the scapegoat has become "rich people", the so-called one percent. No body ever considers themselves rich, so that automatically makes everyone the "good guys." I don't think it is that simple. I think we all share the blame for this, and many of society's ills.

So what is my solution? It is very simple, and it begins on a personal level. Occupy your job. Occupy the classroom. Occupy personal responsibility. Be the best version of yourself that you can possibly be. Stop blaming others for your failures and your shortcomings. Take back the control, and the power that you have given up as an individual. Stop being a sheep.

I could sit here and complain all day about the things that I don't have. I could look across the street at my neighbor's house. I could be envious of his car, his house, his guitars, and his perfectly manicured lawn. Or I could be thankful for what I have, walk over and become friends with him so he will share his things with me. Then I will work hard to achieve what I consider to be success.

That is what it is all about. Educate yourself, find a good job(easier said than done right now, but you get the idea), pay your taxes, don't get into debt, provide for your family, help those in need, be part of a community, don't break the law, don't be a burden to the system, be a productive member of society. Play with your kids. Take your wife out to dinner. Smile. Be happy. Stop worrying about the things that you cannot control. Most of all, Occupiers, stay off the road so I can get to work.

Funny Picture.

Thank you for editing, Peter Ogle.

An eventful week...

2011-11-14T23:37:00.000-08:00

The rumors are true. We are having a baby! I will give you a second to take that in before we move on.

To be perfectly honest, it has not completely sunk in yet. I am aware of the situation, but my mind has not fully grasped the concept. As we are letting people know, the reality is becoming even more real. The reality is that I am going to be a father, and as scary as that may sound to us all, it is now upon us. There is no avoiding the fact.

I am planning on starting a "baby blog" in the coming days, but for the time being this blog will suffice to chronicle the beginning of this journey. Especially since the decision to have a baby is tied to my legal status in the United States. Let me elaborate.

When we first got married, our decision was to wait five years to have a child. There were several factors that contributed to making this choice in the amount of time we would wait. The biggest reason being the state of my residency. I would not be comfortable with starting a family if I could not legally be in the country. For one, it is difficult to get a job with benefits. It is also a struggle to get a loan to buy a house or just to have credit. There is also the ever present fear of being deported and separated from your family. For people with illegal family members this is a very scary thought that is always present.

When I became a legal U.S. resident, I felt more comfortable about the idea of having a baby. For starters, I made a great choice when it came to choosing the mother of my children. She will be a great mother, and that is one of the biggest reasons I chose to spend my life with her. We have a good, solid relationship that will help us transition into our role as parents. Society is quickly changing around us, but I still believe in the value of a two-parent home. Forgive me if that sounds "politically incorrect."

So on our third anniversary we made The Decision. I knew she was ready, and I felt that I was also ready to face the challenge. I felt at peace with the decision, and I knew that was important. I knew that every single one of my concerns would be answered in God's time. We also have a great support group. Our family, friends, and church will be with us every step of the way.

Our anniversary is in September. Fast forward to the beginning of this month. My wife's health was was giving us some strong hints, but we were hesitant to label them as pregnancy symptoms. At times, my wife has had health issues that would lead us to believe that she was pregnant. She would feel sick to her stomach for a few days, and the thought would slowly creep into our minds. We would buy tests, but the results were always negative.

A few weeks ago she began to feel some of the same things, but she told me she felt different this time. She made a doctor's appointment to get a blood test, and if she wasn't pregnant we needed to know what else could it be. I started to get anxious. I wanted to know if she was pregnant, and if she wasn't I was concerned about what else could be wrong. On Thursday she made an appointment for the following Wednesday. This was too long of a wait for me.

By Tuesday I was desperate to know the Truth. My wife also wanted to know, but for some reason she was slightly more calm than I was. I was pacing all over the place, as I am apt to do in certain situations. She finally relented and I was off to find a pregnancy test. I walked to Circle K, and when I struck out there I drove to several other places in search of the tests. I have to say that the pilgrimage helped to calm me down slightly. I found the tests. (I will not say where, unless I can negotiate some online advertising for free diapers.)

I returned to our house, and I gave my wife the test. She made her way upstairs, which left me downstairs alone with my racing mind. I wanted the test to be positive. We had been disappointed before, and we were getting anxious. So I waited some more. A million thoughts were going through my mind. I could not tell you a single one.

Pregnant.

Several agonizing minutes later, my wife comes quickly down the stairs. I knew from the way she was coming down that we had a positive test. I went into a state of semi-shock. I can't remember her exact words, but she showed me the test. The result was faint, yet unmistakeable. It was there. A little blue cross that meant something much bigger. We were going to be parents. We are going to be parents. Even as I write this, the Truth is slowly sinking into my mind.

The result was faint, so she took another one the next morning. (That is the one pictured here.) Then she went to her doctor's appointment where she had another test, as well as a blood test. The results for the blood test would not be know until the next morning. Being the constant skeptic, I decided that I would wait for the result of the blood test before I would fully believe that we were having a baby.

We called the doctor's office the next day, and of course the results were not ready then. So we waited some more. And we began planning how we would tell our family and friends. When the results came back we had a definitive answer.

We are beginning a new journey, and we couldn't be happier. We have had such a great time telling our parents, family members, and friends. This is an imposing task before us, but we know that we are not alone and that makes us feel good. We already love this baby beyond anything that could be written in this humble blog. He or she will be surrounded people that love and care for him.Or her. (It will be hard to write about him or her, until we find out whether he is a he or a she.) That love is evident as we were given our first gift by a special, thoughtful, wise friend.

There will be no questions about where my child's allegiances will lie.

The Aimless Musings of a Chronic Insomniac

2011-10-22T09:09:00.000-07:00

Its 4:04 a.m and I cannot get to sleep. It might have something to do with the rather strong cup of coffee that I had earlier, but I don't want to jump to any conclusions. This was a serious cup of "joe" and I am paying the consequences for drinking it so late at night. If you are reading this you are also paying the consequences. Misery seeks company. My mind is racing a million miles an hour, and this is my attempt to pull it over so I can get some sleep.

I have been thinking about the direction I want this blog to take. I am considering becoming an English major when I transfer to a four-year school, and I have realized that I need to practice my writing. I have several writing assignments during the week, and when I compare my writing to that of my peers I feel that I can definitely improve. I know that I shouldn't compare myself to them, but they just sound so smart.

I listen to my classmate's writing, and I can't feel but feel like my writing is slightly inferior to theirs. I know that I shouldn't compare myself to them, but its human nature. On the other hand, sometimes I think that they have way too much spare time on their hands, and if they were such great writers they would be making a living as writers, not merely studying writing at LBCC. They really enjoy their own writing, and talking about their writing. That is the insomniac talking.

Writing about immigration comes naturally to me. I feel passionate about it, so when the topic comes up I have no shortage of things to say. I read news articles on the matter, and my mind begins to race about what I would write on the topic. I listen to political talk radio, and I hear things that make me want to express myself through the majesty of writing. It is a good way to vent too, because this issue frustrates me sometimes. Especially, when politicians play "hot-potato" with the issues, but that topic is for a different post. Or the next bout of insomnia. Whichever comes first.

There are literally thousands of things to write about. Even when I am supposed to be working on writing for school, I am thinking about various subjects to blog about. I always see or hear things that get my attention, or make me think, and I want to share them with you. I need to get into the habit of writing more often to develop my style, and build an audience. Like most writers I think my ultimate goal is to have a publisher read my blog, love it, and give me a gazillion dollars to write a book. Then I would be on Oprah, and I would not have to depend on student loans to get through school. Once again, that is the insomniac talking.

I have big plans for this blog, and for other blogs. I am learning to enjoy writing for the sake of writing, and if anyone enjoys reading it, that just makes it better. In fact, I enjoy it so much that I just realized I could be doing homework right now. Oh well.

If you are still with me, I hope my ramblings have not confused you too much. I enjoy having this creative outlet, and I like hearing from my readers. All thirteen of you. I enjoy hearing from you, and if you like what you read, share it with your friends. Even if you disagree with my radical political views. Maybe I can help you see things from a different point of view, or maybe I can inspire you to express yourself in your own way.

Or maybe I will just cure your insomnia.

P.S. I think I'm going to wait to post this until I get some sleep. It all makes sense to my sleep deprived mind now, but who knows how it will read in the morning.

Going home

2011-10-19T20:22:00.000-07:00

The return trip was an adventure in itself. It included getting my visa stamped, a long wait at the border, and more airports and airplanes. In a matter of hours I went from the country of my birth, to the country that I know as my home. I started out in the one of the deadliest cities in the world, and I ended up in peaceful Corvallis, Oregon.

I went to the Zaragosa border crossing early Tuesday morning to get my visa stamped. The driver dropped me off on the Mexico side of the crossing and I walked to the American side where I had to turn in my documents. We went early in the morning to avoid having to wait in line, as the border crossing gets very busy. Even at that early hour there were a lot of people crossing into El Paso. I learned that many people work in the States, but they live in Mexico. Certain living expenses are cheaper in Mexico, so it makes financial sense. Depending on where you work you may have to leave your house several hours early to get to work on time.

There are several lanes of traffic as well as a pedestrian bridge. I was on the pedestrian walkway, and I walked across to the United States. Something that I found slightly amusing was that in order to get on the bridge from the Mexico side you had to pay 60 cents. I thought that was kind of interesting.

Boundary Marker

Right in the middle of the bridge there is a plaque marking the boundary between the U.S. and Mexico. I really expected something more exciting to mark the border, but this was all I got. I was also expecting some kind of fanfare as I walked across, but, once again, I got nothing. The truth is you can walk right across the border without having a visa. The only issue with that is that the bridge leads you right to the Homeland Security outpost where they might ask to see some documents.

I got to the crossing, and I walked into a room with a waiting area and a few windows where immigration officers were working. There was a separate line for people that had already been admitted, and who regularly crossed to border to work or shop in the U.S. That line was long, but the area I was supposed to be in was pretty empty. I sat down, and waited for an official to call me up to the window. When it was my turn I walked up, and handed him my packet. He walked to the back for a few minutes.

At this point, I know that I am in the clear, and that I am going home. For some reason, I felt a bit nervous for just one second. Like he was going to come back and tell me that there was a problem, and that I would have to stay in Mexico longer. Or that they had changed their minds entirely, and that I was not welcome in the U.S. Obviously, this didn't happen, but it did not stop my imagination from running wild for just one second.

The officer came back to the window, I signed something, and he fingerprinted me. Then he stamped my visa, and he welcomed me to the United States. He told me that I could leave and re-enter the country at any time. That felt good. It felt like an important moment, and I felt thankful.

Cameras and security devices everywhere

Thousand of people cross everyday

I walked back to the Mexico side where the driver was waiting for me, and he took me back to the hostel. I gathered all my things, and I waited for a different driver to take me to the El Paso Airport. This was no easy task. Even though El Paso and Ciudad Juarez are right next to each other, it took us almost two hours to get from the house to the airport. Without traffic, this would should have taken about twenty minutes. On our way out of Mexico we were also stopped and briefly questioned by the Mexican Federal Police, or los Federales. That was kind of exciting. Then joined the mass of vehicles trying to get into the U.S., and we waited. Snail's pace is a fitting term to describe how we moved towards the border. The good news was if we ever got hungry, or just wanted to waste money, there were hundred of street vendors walking up and down, between cars, selling their wares.

Even after we got past the official border, they were everywhere. Legal or not they walk right past the boundary. They don't go past the checkpoint, but they do cross the line. The driver told me that every once in a while a few border patrol agents with walk up towards Mexico, and they will herd these vendors back into Mexico. These are the things you learn while waiting at a border crossing.

When you go through the border, your car is monitored by massive, high-tech cameras. The driver was telling me that the cameras had extremely high resolution, and they had used the images to apprehend a fugitive several months before. We slowly made our way to the booth where a border patrol agent took our identification, and scanned it. He gave it back to us, and after asking us why we were coming into the country, he welcomed us to the United States. I was getting closer and closer to being home. I was back in America, but this time I came in through the front door(not my expression).

Once again, I was struck by the immediate contrast between these two countries that are right next to each other. It is a completely different feeling that I have had a hard time describing. I pointed this contrast out to the driver, and he dismissed it. He said, "No matter where we are, we are all the same. We work, we eat, we sleep." I couldn't help but think that this was a very simplistic observation. He is half right, but you have to admit that there is a definite contrast between the two places. One is better than the other, and I am not saying that it is a reflection of the people because it isn't. It is two countries that went in entirely different directions, and one has done better than the other. That is not to say that this country does not have serious problems of its own, but that is for a different blog.

It is interesting how certain small things can have such a comforting effect on a person. The simple fact that everything was in English made me feel at home again. I knew that i could drink the water without fear of getting some horrible sickness. My cell phone was not roaming anymore. It is the little things that matter.

He dropped me off at the airport, and I began the process of trying to find a flight to Portland. I was seriously fed up with airports at this point. I walked up to one airline counter, and it was if I didn't exist for a couple of minutes. When I tried to say something the "person" cut me off, and told me to wait my turn. There wasn't anyone else in line. After striking out here, and at several other airlines, I found a flight that was leaving within an hour. Unfortunately, it would come at a steep price. Oh well. I wanted to go home.

I paid for my ticket and went through the slowest security line in the world. Of course, whenever I am not in a hurry these line are quick and efficient. Today, I was in a hurry, and they were taking their sweet time. I always get the impression that they use some acting when they look at your boarding pass so intently. Because all they are looking at is to make sure the names matches with your id, but a higher power told them to look at it as if they were trying to read hieroglyphics. I didn't care. I was going home.

Before I made it to my terminal I made sure I was going to the right place. I read a story about a guy that flew to Portland, Oregon when he actually needed to be in Portland, Maine. I wanted to avoid that mistake. I flew from El Paso to Dallas-Fort Worth, then finally on to Portland. Portland, Oregon.

My wife met me at the the airport. When I saw her I knew I was home. I was having a hard time believing I was back in the States. It felt unreal for the first few days. The familiar places felt unfamiliar for a while, but after about a week I felt like I had never been gone. Of course, there is no way I will ever forget my journey. I think about it often, and I miss my family. My journey is not over. If anything, it is just beginning. I still have friends and family in this horrible situation, and it has become my goal to help them and others. I have seen the need for people that are willing to stand up for the cause, not only in words, but in actions. Which is why I want to go to law school and become an immigration attorney.

I will keep you up to date with that development, as well as giving my opinion on immigration matters as they come up. Immigration has been in the news a lot recently, and I know you are all dying to know what I think about them. Thank you for reading, and feel free to comment.

Waiver appointment, and the longest week and a half or my life.

2011-10-07T20:59:00.000-07:00

Much of my case was built around what is known as a hardship waiver. My wife was petitioning for me as a U.S. citizen, but because I had entered the country illegally I was subject to a ten year ban. To get around this ban you are required to submit a hardship waiver packet.

We built our waiver on several different aspects, but the biggest one was my wife's health issues. We had to present these issues, and why it was important for her to have me around. We also made a point to say that she had to be in the U.S. for treatment of these ailments, and because we could not get used to life in Mexico. They can say that your spouse can move with you to another country, so you have to build a case that shows that both of you need to stay in America.

There are many ways to go about building a hardship case. Some people use their, or a good job, or debt, family problems, emotional problems, or any circumstance you can imagine. This is where our attorney really helped us. She aided us in building a case, and making the waiver packet which included affidavit letters, medical records, bills and other documents that show that you are living together as a couple.

The affidavit letters are very important. They are written, by friends, family member, and co-workers. It should be people that know you very well, and that can attest to how difficult it would be for your spouse to live without you. These letters are not letters of recommendation, which is a common misconception. The immigration officers that are deciding your case don't really care if you are the nicest person in the world, or if everyone really likes you. Their "concern" is for the American citizen who would suffer if you were not around.

Another important aspect of the waiver is the financial aspect. Basically, they do not want you to be a burden on the government, by being on food stamps, or welfare or whatever. You have to prove that you are a certain percentage over the poverty line. If you do not meet this standard you have to get a sponsor. This is someone who can support you in the event that you cannot get a job or if you lose your job.

All of these things are out in a packet that you turn in several weeks after your interview appointment. Before I left for Mexico I was under the impression that my waiver appointment would not occur until the end of May. That would put my return to the U.S. sometime in June at the earliest. I was prepared for this, and I packed accordingly. Everything but the kitchen sink, as they say.

Several days after my interview appointment my lawyer contacted me to inform me that they were able to schedule an appointment much sooner that we anticipated. It was set for April 18th, which was only two weeks after my interview appointment. This was pretty much unheard of. There were people in Juarez that had been waiting for their appointment since January. They didn't believe me, even after I showed them the e-mail from my lawyer. Everyone that I talked to was surprised that I had gotten in so soon after my interview.

I had no explanation for them, but I knew that back home people were praying for me and my situation. I also knew that my legal team was working hard on my behalf. I was just thankful that things were going well for me.

I went to my appointment early on a Monday morning. I had my waiver packet with me as well as my Mexican Passport. I went through the same security line as the first time, and I made my way to the infamous waiting area to wait my turn. I had my number, so I did not look away from the screens so I would not miss my turn.

When my number came up, I made my way to the assigned window. This line was to pay the waiver fee. It cost me five hundred and eighty five American dollars to file the waiver. This was before I even knew if they would grant the waiver, or not. I had a scary moment here because for some reason their machine would not read my debit card. I had a similar thing happen to me at the Mexico City Airport, so this made me very nervous for a minute. Fortunately he was able to run my card manually.

After I paid the man I sat back down in the waiting area to wait for my number to be called up again. I had given him the waiver packet as well. My number came up again, so I walked to a different window, and spoke to yet another immigration official.

This interaction was fairly short and simple. He had my packed, and some notes from my interview. He went over some of the questions with me, mostly about any run ins with the law. I didn't have any problems there, so I gave him my passport and I was done. They take your passport so they can print a visa inside of it if your waiver is approved.

Whether your waiver is approved or denied you have to pick up your packet at a designated DHL branch. To get into the branch you needed a government id. My Oregon driver's license had expired so that is why I had to get a Mexican driver's license while I was in Hidalgo.

After turning these things in to the official he told me that someone would review the documents, and that I would hear from them in the next few days. This meant going back to the hostel, and waiting it out there. I was not looking forward to that.

My waiver appointment was on a Monday. I was hoping to hear from them by the end of the week, and maybe be home by the weekend. It did not happen this way. That weekend was Easter, and because Mexico is a Catholic country they observe the holiday by shutting down on Thursday and Friday. This included the U.S. Consulate. Unfortunately, this set me back two days.

I waited from Monday the 18th to Wednesday the 27th. That was the longest week and a half of my life. The hardest part was not knowing whether I had been approved or not. Being away from my family was also becoming more and more difficult. Everyday people asked me if I knew anything yet, and I could sense that they were getting as impatient as I was. I was also battling boredom, malnourishment, and people taking my things from the refrigerator.

Speaking of malnourishment, I have to say that one semi-positive aspect about this week was that I lost some weight. Mostly because I didn't want to cook while I was at the hostel. Most of the food I bought was bread, instant soups, and granola bars. When I bought ham to make sandwiches, someone else ate it. So one day I took a walk down the street to a place that sold whole roasted chicken, and I bought one. After a few days of no protein, I ate the best chicken I had ever eaten. It seemed that way to me at least.

Even though that week that I waited for my packet seemed to stretch on forever, there are people that have to wait much longer than I did. I met a couple that had been there since the beginning of the year. Another friend waited for another month and a half after his waiver appointment. It was a long month, but looking back I am thankful that it didn't take any longer than it did.

When you turn in your packet, they give you a tracking number that you use to track your packet online. My wife was checking this number several times a day. I would sit in my room, eating reading, watching tv or sleeping, and I would wait to see if anything had changes.

I have to admit that there were a few moments of desperation during my wait, especially during the weekend. when Wednesday rolled around I had sort of relaxed and accepted that I was going to have to wait. I woke up and followed my normal daily routine of doing nothing. Then my wife called me. I knew as soon as the phone rang what it was for. The packet was in. It was ready for me to pick it up.

I went out and found the driver to tell him that I needed to be driven to the DHL branch. He said, "Let's go right now." Even though I didn't know what news the packet had, I felt that I was close to going home. He seemed very optimistic, and that made me feel confident.

It was late in the day so they were pretty close to closing for the day. I presented my i.d. at the door, and I walked inside. I made my way up up to the counter, and I gave the clerk my routing number. He looked up some information on the computer, and he walked to a back room. He came back out holding a large DHL envelope.

I could tell that it was a thick packet, which I heard was a good sign. Thick packets mean that your visa was approved. A thin packet would be a rejection notice. He set it on the counter, and on the top of the pile was my Passport, open to show a visa printed on the inside. I had been approved. I was going home.

He gave me some instructions about what I had to do with the visa and the packet. I had to go to a border crossing, which was indicated on my packet, and have my visa stamped by a Homeland Security officer. I would give him my packet which had various forms that had to be sent out for me to receive a Social Security number, a green card, and for Selective Service registration. I would then be allowed to enter the United States as a Permanent Resident.

Sample photo. Not my visa

Because it was so late in the day, the driver suggested we head back for the night, and that I should leave early the next morning. The border crossing gets really busy during the evening, and it would be hours before I got my passport stamped. So we made our way back to the house where I began packing and cleaning my room. I called my family, and told them the good news. I was going home.

Family time...

2011-09-15T22:50:00.000-07:00

My last post was supposed to be about the time I spent with my family, but it became something completely different. I spent way too much time in airplane and in airports, so I had to express my opinions.

I have to write about my family because they were such a large and important part of my journey. Because I was in the U.S. illegally, I could not go out and visit them without having major complications on the return trip. This is an unfortunate fact, not only for my family, but also for countless others. In my case, I was separated from grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins. For many others it includes parents, siblings, and even spouses. I am very fortunate in that regard because I was only apart from my parents for a few months before they brought me over.

During those months I was looked after by both sets of grandparents and my aunts. Although I missed my parents terribly, they all did their best to provide a loving environment for me. I have very vivid memories of my family caring for me during this time. I was surrounded my aunts, and they all spoiled me to no end. I knew that when I returned I would be received with warmth even though many years had passed.

From the first moment that they picked me up from the Mexico City Airport, my family went our of their way to make my stay with them as comfortable and memorable as possible. They took me in, fed me (too much), and they never let me pay for anything.

Let me share an example of their kindness. While I was there I had to get an ID card. The one that would be easier to get would be a driver's license. One of my aunts took time out of her day to drive me around town getting everything that I needed. The license itself was very easy to get, but because I haven't lived in Mexico I had no residence. I had to go around to different government offices to get different documents, copies of documents, and photographs. Since I was new to all of it, she was doing most of the talking. She was also pregnant at the time, and I'm sure that all of the walking around was not easy for her.

I was blessed by this act and all the other things that my family did for me during my time with them. My favorite times in Mexico where when we would all be together, as a family. I would sit, watch them for a second and take a mental picture of them. I was happy to see them, and to be with them. Even though I hadn't seen them in years, I felt right at home with them. I miss them, and I can't wait to visit them soon.

You may have asked yourself about the blog's title, "Nameless Traveler," and its origin. Or maybe you haven't. Well, it was the only name that I could come up with that was not taken, and at first I didn't really like. Now that the journey has ended I have begun to appreciate the name more and more. Let me explain why.

What a cute baby...

Before I became legal I did not exist to the U.S. government. I was truly nameless. When I returned to Mexico, even though I was a Mexican citizen, I had no roots. I had a birth certificate and passport, but no address or anything to my name. Once again I was nameless. Spending time with my family helped to to remember where I came from, and where my name came from. I saw the places where I was a baby, where I grew up, and where my parents lived.

Even though I was out of my comfort zone, I felt at home with them. I know that at any point I can walk into any one of their homes, and they would be glad to see me. I hope that one day we can all be reunited as a family. I want my parents to see their parents and siblings. I want my brothers to see their extended family, and to see where they come from. I want my wife to see it, and when the time comes I want my future children to see it as well. Someday...

Family

In the meantime...

2011-09-06T12:24:00.000-07:00

I had a couple of weeks between my interview and waiver appointment. It was a perfect opportunity to spend time with my family. I hadn't seen most of them in almost twenty years, and I was really excited about spending time with them. Buying a couple of plane tickets would also be less expensive than staying in Ciudad Juarez the whole time between my appointments. It would also take less of a toll on my emotional well being.

My flight left very early on a Tuesday morning. It was still very dark when I had to leave, so the owners of the hostel were reluctant to drive me to the airport. They have a driver on staff, and my flight was before he even had to be at work. The alternative was hiring a taxi, which is not really the safest choice. Fortunately, the driver was willing to drive me to the airport on his own time.

The Juarez airport is pretty small, and my check-in was uneventful. Except for I accidentally left a bottle of lotion in my carry on. I was hoping that Mexican airport laws would be a little more lax than in America. They were not. So it went into the garbage.

I don't really remember much from that particular flight, but I counted how many total flights I took during my trip. I counted seven total flights. I think I flew more in the month of April than I have in my entire life. I don't ever really want to see the inside of an airport, or airplane, or hear one more flight safety speech any more. I get very restless during flights, and because I can't really afford first class at the moment, there was not a whole lot I could do except sit there and figure out which was of sitting was the least uncomfortable.

I usually enjoy the window seats for the view, and because it if the lesser of three evils. The problem with the isle seat is that you have to get up anytime anyone wants to leave their seat. Anytime the flight attendant comes down the aisle with the drink cart she has to reach over you to give the other people their drinks and snacks. That drink cart can also be very painful if it runs into your misplaced elbow.

The middle seat is a problem because you are sitting between two people. If those two people decide they want the arm rest you will spend the entire flight trying to make yourself as compact as possible. The issue are multiplied if you are sitting by complete strangers. I hardly ever get the middle seat.

The window seat is my favorite, but it is not without its drawbacks. I think we have all noticed most airplanes

are cylindrical in shape. If you are in the window seat your foot that is on the window side will be very uncomfortable because the plane starts to curve, which doesn't let you rest your foot flat on the floor of the plane. I know these are first world problems, but I wondering of this bothers anyone else.

Of course, the good part of the window seat is the view. I love looking out the window throughout the flight. I enjoy the takeoff, watching everything below me become smaller and smaller, and finally I enjoy the landing.One of my favorite flights was from Mexico City to Ciudad Juarez. The name of the airline was Interjet. They had a screen at the front of the plane that showed feeds from various cameras on the plane. During the flight the screen displayed different types of information such as fuel consumption and the flight location on a map.

During the trip I had the privilege of visiting several airports including, Mexico City, El Paso, Dallas-Fort Worth, and of course Portland. I have come to the scientific conclusion that the Portland Airport is one of the best in the country. I don't really know how this post turned into an airport/airplane seat review post, but I guess it is alright considering this is a travel blog. So let me share one of the worst airport experiences I have had.

For my flight to Ciudad Juarez to Mexico City I had to spend several hours at the airport. I had an early morning flight which I missed, but I was able to book a flight in the afternoon. Unfortunately, this meant I had to wait for a really long time. I couldn't even check my bags or go through security. The first this I discovered was that there was absolutely no place to rest comfortably. I found some stairs to sit at, but it was a high traffic area. Any time I wanted to go somewhere I had to take all my bags with me. They were not light, or easy to maneuver. After walking around for a few minutes I found a hallway that was away from everyone, and where I could stretch out and relax. I was sleep deprived, but I could not sleep for fear of my things being stolen.

Finally the time came to check my bags and go through security. I went through security without incident, and I made my way to the waiting area. My ticket didn't have the terminal printed on it so I didn't really know where to go. While I waited I sampled some of the local cuisine. I had Subway, It didn't taste too good.

I found a place to sit while I waited for my flight information to show up on the screen. That is where things went slightly crazy. I am always nervous before a flight right up until the point where I am sitting in the plane. I'm nervous about arriving on time, checking in, going through security, and finding my terminal. Once I am in my seat I can relax and enjoy the flight.

So the fact that I wasn't getting the flight information was not helping my nerves. I had to be in Juarez the next day for my waiver appointment. There was nothing I could do but wait. So I waited.

When the information finally came on the screen, I walked to the terminal which wasn't that far from where I was waiting, and I sat down to wait for my flight. I didn't wait very long before I boarded the plane, and we were off to Juarez. The flight was uneventful, but enjoyable. The plane had a screen that showed different views from cameras that were on the outside of the airplane. During take-off and landing you could see what it looked like from the nose and belly of the plane.

Once we got the the airport I got a taxi to take me back to the hostel. They were all surprised I was back so soon. There is usually at least two months between appointments, but I was able to get mine quicker than most.

My waiver appointment was the very next morning. I settled into my room, and got to bed, but not before taking some time to reflect on the memories I had made with my family. I wish I had more time with them, but I am also excited that I can visit anytime that my finances permit me to do so. I also can't wait to take my wife. I want her to see where I come from, and to meet my family.

A change of pace

2011-08-07T18:45:00.000-07:00

So far this blog has been a narrative about my journey back to Mexico. I have explained the steps that we have had to take in order for me to become a permanent legal resident. It has been an interesting experience writing these things and hearing people's responses to what I write. I still have a few more stories to tell, but this post will be different than the rest.

I wanted to use this blog to chronicle my journey, and share with others what I was going through. As the story comes closer to an end, I have started to think about what I want this blog to evolve into. When I make my triumphant return to school it will be to pursue an English major, which will then lead me to a law degree, which will hopefully lead to a career as an immigration attorney. This blog is a good way for me to practice my writing, and it also helps me articulate my thoughts and feelings about our nation's immigration issues.

My hope is that, as people read my blog, they will not see me as a republican, or a democrat, or liberal, or conservative, or whatever you want, but as a human being. A person with hopes, dreams, and aspirations. Someone they can relate to in some way. As you read my blog, I don't want you to change your political allegiances, but I do want you to see things through my glasses, and walk a mile in my shoes, and other similar cliches.

This change of pace was inspired by a Facebook post. It was not someone that I personally know, but it was brought to my attention. I do not have the post in front of me, but I will try to paraphrase it as best as I can.
And I paraphrase..."There are 97,000 illegal Mexicans living in Oregon. If they all went back to where they belong, unemployment would go down." End of paraphrase.They also wrote that they knew that this would offend people, and they knew there were prejudiced. Really?!

Put yourself in my position for a second. The statement was not just a political one, but it really started to cross the line into blatant racism. How do I respond to something like this? Do I get down to their level, and respond in a similar fashion? No. That would be counterproductive because people are like this are set in their ways, so they would not even be willing to participate in a rational discussion on the matter.

I will, however, respond to their assertion that if all the "illegal Mexicans" went away, all of Oregon's economic problems would also go away. I should point out that I am not an economist, but I did take an economics class in school.

I think the writer of the aforementioned Facebook post is making a large assumption by saying that removing a large number of people from a community would somehow improve the economy. Forget for a second about whether these people are legal or illegal. They are simply consumers. People that work, and spend their money locally.

The most important part of any business is the customer. If you remove any number of customers from any type of business, that establishment would suffer. Whether it is a restaurant, auto repair shop or a grocery store, the fact remains the same. Think about what happens to our local community in the summer when OSU students go home for the summer. Businesses that are frequented by those students are not as prosperous as they are when the students are around. On a much larger scale, Oregon's economy would be negatively affected by the loss of a large number of consumers. Not to mention, the loss of tax revenue that would be lost of those workers left.

A second point I would like to make is that adding migrant workers to an economy does not weaken it, but strengthens it. You don't have to take my word for it either. According to the Wall Street Journal, "migrants are good for economies." There is no simpler way to say it.

This may not address the issue of legal vs. illegal immigrants, but it helps the cause along. There is also something to be said about the diversity that migrants bring to a region. Imagine how boring life would be if you could only eat a certain type of food. Personally I enjoy Italian food, Chinese food, American food, and of course Mexican food. I can appreciate other cultures, as well as treasuring my own.

I hope that I have not bored my you too much with my rambling, but what this person wrote really got to me. I believe the lesson is, think before you post on Facebook. It is one thing to have a personal belief or opinion, but attacking a whole group of people based on personal prejudices is never right. Maybe this is not something that you would ever do, but if you ever come across it do the right thing. I will leave you with the link to the WSJ article I quoted. Wall Street Journal

Interview Appointment

2011-07-21T23:36:00.000-07:00

I had my interview appointment on April 4th. I woke up early to get ready for the interview. I was really nervous and anxious, but I knew that God was in control. I had a granola bar, and a bottle of water for breakfast. I think that is all my stomach could handle at that point.

Waiting at the gate

My appointment was set for 9:15 am, and the driver picked me up at about 7:30. We drove to the consulate, and I got in line at the waiting area. Here they check your passport and other document to verify your identity and that you have an appointment. There were tv screens that had instructions, and told you what you what you could not bring into the consulate. I didn't have to wait there very long.

They had us line up and walk to the consulate, which is down the street from the waiting area. At the consulate we line up outside a metal fence. There was a guard there shouting out more instructions about what the security line would be like.

After getting my documents checked at the gate I went into a security room. There were several lines and metal detectors. I emptied my pockets and walked through without any incident. They gave me a number and I walked over to the waiting area to wait for my turn.

The waiting area is outdoors, but it has a roof over it. There were several screens around displaying people's numbers as they were being called up. The screen shows your number, as well as the window number you have to go to. I brought along a book, but I was too anxious to read. I also didn't want to miss seeing my number on the screen. There was not any logical order to the numbers, so it was hard to predict when your number would be called.

Example of a ticket

Waiting Area

The first time my number was called I walked into the building and up to the window with my first packet. There was also a waiting are inside where there were already several hundred people waiting. I would guess that when I arrived there were over 200 people waiting their turn They asked me for my passport, and proof that I had the appointment. Then the official told me to sit back down, and watch for my number again. I sat once again and waited for my number. When it came on the screen again I made my way to the designated window, and I waited in line. At this window they were scanning fingerprints to verify identification. After I got done at this window, I sat back down to await the final step for the day: the interview.

This is a vital step in the process because the interviewer has the ability approve or deny your attempt at a waiver. The issues they are most concerned with are when you entered the country, family life, and any problems with law enforcement. I was nervous about the interview, and of course this was the longest wait of the day.

I was sitting near the windows so I could hear bits and pieces of other people's interviews. I do not recommend this because everybody's case is different. I saw one lady who had her visa application accepted on the spot. That made me feel better, and I was happy for her. Unfortunately, I also saw people that had sad looks on their faces when their cases were rejected.

Finally, my number was called. This was it. A truly life changing moment. I had thought about what I was going to say for days. I walked up to the window, and I was greeted by the lady who was going to be interviewing me. I had been trying to picture this moment in my head for so long. This interview could make or break my case. She had me read an oath then raise my right hand and swear that everything that I was saying was true.

My attorney had prepared me for the interview, but it was nothing like the real thing. The interviewer asked me a few simple biographical questions. She asked me how I met my wife. She asked about my in laws, my brothers, my parents, when I entered the U.S., when I returned to Mexico.

Then she asked my my wife's favorite food. I completely blanked for a second. Not because I didn't know it, but because I did not expect that type of question. I answered the question, and for some inexplicable reason, I felt relief. It was as if I was affirming to them that my marriage was not a sham to get a green card, and I felt more confident about my application being accepted.

After she asked me all the questions, she informed me that because I had entered the country illegally I was subject to a ten year ban, but that I was eligible to apply for a waiver. I was prepared for this, and I said thank you very much, and I left.I felt so much better at that point. I was half way there, and I knew that I was going to see my family very soon. My flight out to see them was the next morning.

Like so many things in this process, the interview felt like it was over before it started. I had built it up in my had over the past months, but once I got through it I felt much better. I could focus on the next aspect of my journey, which was visiting my family. I had not seen them in almost 20 years. That was really the highlight of my journey.

Pre-interview: Fingerprints and medical exam.

2011-06-30T14:06:00.000-07:00

U.S. Consulate

Ever since I got back many people have asked me what the process is like. Well, where do I begin?

As you can see from the picture, the Consulate is an ominous looking place. On the outside, it looks more like a prison than a government office. Of course, the people inside are much like the friendly government employees we have come to know and love.

Like many of these places, the routine is the same; hurry up and wait. Once you enter this building you become a number. Nothing more, nothing less. They don't care who you are, where you are from, and what you want. You are in their territory. As soon as you leave the building, you no longer exist to them.

The first appointment was a fingerprint appointment I had that the first day that I was in Mexico. Ciudad Juarez is dirty, desert-like place, and the U.S. Consulate is like an oasis in the middle of a desolate wasteland. Juarez is an ugly city, but as you drive closer and closer to the consulate you start to notice nicer buildings and businesses. In the blocks around it there are department stores, nice hotels, Starbucks, and other popular establishments.

Waiting room

The fingerprint appointment was not at the Consulate itself, but at the Applicant Service Center. It is down the street from the main building, and it is not actually part of the U.S. Consulate. At the fingerprint appointment, they take your picture and they scan your fingerprints. It is how they identify you when you go to the appointment. It is also a type of digital signature where you swear that you will the the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth at your interview.

Its a quick affair at the ASC. You present your passaport, proof of your appointment, and you are in the door. Then you sit, and wait. Then they call you over to a counter where you are searched. Then you wait. Then they call you to a cubicle, and the scan your hand and take your pictures. You have to read a placard on the wall that is a type of oath, and you are done. After this appointment I had a quick dinner at a little gordita stand. (I do miss the food.)

Smile!

Then it was back to the house for a nap. I could not stay awake any longer.

The next day our driver took us to our medical exam. He got a few of us into the car and we headed off to the clinic next to the consulate. The medical building was nice, clean, and the people were very professional. Maybe they were a little too professional. It was obvious that this place had become a business that was benefiting from the Consulate. You are required to pay the fee and any shots that you may need. They are not affiliated with the consulate, but they provide you with the results that you need at the interview.

Once again, the theme is wait, wait and wait some more. They have a waiting room. You give them proof of your appointment and your id. They give you a number and they send you to another waiting room. When they call you up to yet another window you give them your passport. They separate men and women and they make groups of about 10.

You are led into a room where they have you take off your shirt. You are called one by one into and x-ray room where they take a scan of your lungs. They do this very quickly and efficiently. Then you go into yet another waiting room. This is where I ran into somebody I knew from Oregon. It was a big relief to have a familiar face to share this experience with. When we found out the next step in the process we got slightly more nervous. We were going to get our blood drawn.

I don't know if I have brought this up before, but I have a problem with needles, and the sight of blood, and the sight of other peoples' blood. The way they did it also made me uncomfortable. You are herded into a room with a group of strangers. They sit you in a chair that has a raised arm. The room wasn't very big at all, so you are sitting inches away from someone getting their blood taken.

On the outside, I was trying to appear calm and collected, but internally I was panicking. I did not want to have my blood taken, nor did I want to see other people's blood. These nurses were very efficient. It was like some kind of factory. when my name was called I raised my hand. A nurse walked over to me and she told me to hold my hand out, and to make a fist. I looked away, fearing the absolute worst. I felt a slight pinch, and it was over. She had her sample. She told me to get up. I didn't eat breakfast so I felt a little faint. I think she noticed because she asked me if I felt ok.

I got out of the chair, relieved that I had lived through the ordeal, but of course it was not over. We were led to yet another waiting area. In the next area they weighed us, took our blood pressure, and checked our hearing and vision. Then we went into individual rooms where we were examined by a doctor. The doctor went over me very quickly, and she asked me questions about drug usage and diseases and things like that. Before I went to Mexico I made sure I had most of my shots. That strategy paid off. The doctor told me that I did not need any shots, and that I could go.

I paid at the front desk, and I waited for the other guys that were with me. One of them had to get several shots, and another had to go through a "psychological exam." I think in a previous interview he had lied about using drugs, so they made him jump through a few extra hoops. They told us to return in a few hours for our results. When we got the results we were told that we could not open them before our appointment at the consulate. Then we headed to the grocery store for some shopping.

You had to do your own cooking at the hostel, which we didn't really want to do so we bought plenty of cup-o-noodles, and simple things that would not require cooking or washing dishes. Then the waiting began. I went to the medical exam on a Wednesday, but my actual interview at the consulate was not until Monday morning.

The next few days included a lot of reading, pacing, talking to the other guys, eating, and watching tv. Once in a while my buddy and I braved the outside world and we would walk to the corner convenience store. Or we would sit on the front porch and count how many times the federales drove by. In the next post I will give a play-by-play account of the actual interview.

Not so triumphant return.

2011-06-03T11:38:00.000-07:00

Bienvenidos a Mexico

Going into Mexico was an adventure. It included long flights, longer layovers, bad airport food, and a run-in with a Border Patrol officer.

I left Portland on April 28th. I flew from Portland to San Francisco. I had a layover that lasted several hours. From San Francisco I flew to Dallas-Fort Worth, then on to El Paso. El Paso and Ciudad Juarez are right across the border from each other.

My plan was to land in El Paso then have the people from the hostel I was staying at pick me up. My flight arrived in El Paso at around 10 in the morning. After I retrieved my luggage, I called the lady that was supposed to pick me up from the airport.. I got a hold of her and she told me where to wait for her, and how I would recognize her.

I should mention something that I found interesting here. Before I left just about everyone that knew that I was traveling to Juarez told me to try my best to blend in, and not look like a tourist. They told me that I had to dress like I wasn't from the U.S.

This is harder than it sounds because clothes that you buy in America is going to look American. Even if I had dressed differently people would still know I had been raised in America by the way I spoke. People told me that I shouldn't wear a nice watch or jewelry because that could make you a target for robbery. This is what I had in mind, but I was surprised when I saw the lady that was picking me up. She had on American clothes. She was also wearing expensive looking jewelry.

We get into her car, which is a nice, decent vehicle, and we head towards Mexico. The border is about 10 minutes away from the airport, and once we get close she starts to tell me about how recently Border Patrol has been checking people that are going into Mexico. This could be a problem because I was in the country illegally. So she tells me to get out of the car and walk across the pedestrian bridge into Mexico. She assured me that I the Border Patrol officers wouldn't say anything to me.

Border Patrol Officer

I get out of the car and I start walking towards the border crossing. There are tons of cars and trucks going into Mexico. As I approach the crossing I see a few Homeland Security officers. They didn't seem to pay any attention to me so I kept walking. Then a Border Patrol officer comes over to where I was headed. He sees me walking towards the bridge, so he walks over to the sidewalk I was walking on, and stands there with his arms crossed in front of him. For someone of my legal status, this is the last person you want to see. Most police officers won't question your legal status unless you get arrested. These officers on the other hand, will ask you and they arrest you and deport you. So I definitely panicked a little.

I have never had a run in with them so I didn't know what to expect. The first thing that I noticed was his demeanor. He stood on the sidewalk like I was charging at him with a bat, and when he spoke to me it was obvious that he was trying to be intimidating. I was intimidated. Good job, Officer.

He stopped me and asked me where I was going. I told him that I was going to Ciudad Juarez. Then he asked for identification. All I had on me was my Mexican passport. Right away he knew that I was in the country illegally. He then had me walk over away from the traffic, and he had me empty my pockets. He was asking me where I was from, and about my family. What made him suspicious was the fact that the lady had me get out of the car, so he asked me what was in the car. I told him that I could only account for the things that were in my suitcases.

He has me put all my things back in my pocket. Then we walk back to where the cars are being inspected. The agents ask me what car she was driving, and I point it out to them. They opened all her doors and walk around and inspect it with dogs and they go through my bags. He has me wait on the side, but before he leaves he looks at me and he says, "Don't you dare run. I will catch you, and arrest you." I'm paraphrasing, but he wanted me to understand that he had the power to arrest me and make my life difficult. (And I think he kind of called me fat by saying he would catch me if I tried to run. Which I had no intention of doing, by the way.)

After looking through her car they had me get back into the car. He mumbled, "Good luck," and we were on our way.I was a little shaky still, but I took a deep breath and we made our way to the hostel. As soon as we crossed the border I felt like I had entered a completely new world. I have said it so many times, but I cannot get the contrast out of my mind. There are people all over the streets selling all kinds of things.

They walk up to your cars and offer you gum, candy, fruit, and cigarettes. If they aren't selling something, they are cleaning your windshield or performing some kind of circus act. They even had young children out there in the middle of traffic. That is how so many people make their living. You have to find any way that you can to survive. I wish I could have taken more pictures of the city, but like I said before, I was trying to look as normal as possible, and taking a picture of every little thing is not normal.

When we go to the house she showed me my room. It was decent sized room with two beds and a chair. The room shared a bathroom with only one other room which I was thankful for. The five rooms in the house had to share one bathroom. I had my own door to go outside, which I liked. There were a few things that might be considered building code violations in the U.S. I'm not a building inspector, but I am sure that an uneven floor would not pass and inspection. I had a bottle of water on the floor next to my chair. If you laid a bottle on the floor it would roll to the other side of the room. I can say that it was very different from any other place that I ever stayed at.

I unpacked and made some phone calls. I tried to relax as much as I could after having that little adventure. I turned on the TV and went through all the channels. I was exhausted, but I could not go to sleep because I had an appointment that day. I began to reflect on what had just happened. I had so many things on my mind at that point. I was away from my home, my family, and everything that I knew. Everything was different. I knew the language, but for all intents and purposes I was a stranger in my own land. For a moment, I felt alone. I started to think about the run in with the officer. I had come close to losing everything.It was a frightening thought. But it didn't happen that way. I had a sudden sense of peace. It was as if God was saying to me, "Don't worry. I am with you." A weight was lifted off of me in that moment. I can't say that I was full of faith from that moment on, but when the doubt started to creep back in, I would remember God's faithfulness and that sense of peace would return.

In Conclusion: Part 1

2011-05-13T11:47:00.000-07:00

I have been back in the U.S. for a few days now, and I have neglected my blog. The truth is I have so much to write about, and I really don't know where to begin. I thought that a good place would be to state the purpose of my journey. I should also mention that things here may be slightly political. Read these things with an open mind, and realize that these are not just my opinions, but these are things that happened to me firsthand.

I came to the U.S. when I was five years old. I entered the country illegally. My family was looking for what so many people in our situation seek; a better life. I am not condoning illegal immigration, but the reason thousands of people risk their lives doing it is because they truly believe that life is better in America. And the reality is that life is better here.

Being illegal is not the ideal situation. As an illegal resident, you essentially live in the shadows of society. You never have the opportunities that others have. There are things that most people would not even think about, like going to college, owning a home or having a credit card.Many people ask, "Why not enter legally?" It is a valid question that does not really have a simple response. My answer would be, "It is not that easy."

Applying for a work visa in Mexico is a long and expensive process. So already there is a barrier for people that don't have the resources to begin a legal process. It is much easier to get a tourist visa, but you are not allowed to work, and your time in the U.S. is limited.So the choice most people make is to enter illegally, and that is the decision my family made.

One of the only ways for someone to become a legal resident is by marriage or by a family relationship. I was able to apply for residency because my wife is a U.S. citizen. So last April we began the process. The process lasted almost exactly a year. It involved a lot of gathering documents, filing out forms, driving back and forth to our attorney's office, waiting, asking for letters, waiting some more, and money. Lots of money. I think we invested over ten thousand dollars. That includes attorney fees, application fees, a waiver fee, a medical exam/immunizations, and travel/lodging expenses.

This has consumed our lives for the past year. There is also an emotional toll that comes from not knowing what is going to happen. At any point in the process, someone could have looked at my file and denied our petition. That is where prayer and faith came in.

One of the worst aspects of this whole process is the fact that you have to travel to Ciudad Juarez for an interview and a waiver appointment. In case you did not know, Mexico is in the midst of a major drug war. There is fighting between the government and the drug cartels, and even amongst the drug cartels themselves. Most of this drug battle is concentrated along the Mexico-U.S. border, and Juarez has become one of more dangerous areas. Innocent people are killed there regularly. This made the thought of having to go there slightly more unsettling. There are also reports of kidnappings for ransom, and violent acts against women.

I do have to say that while there is truth to these reports, there is also some slight media exaggeration. Juarez is a large city, and the violence tends to be concentrated in certain areas. During the day, people go about their daily lives. They work, go to school, and run errands. After dark it is a different story. The city sort of shuts down, and for a good reason. It is a place where you have to be careful who you talk to, and who you trust. I had a flight that left early in the morning, and the people that drove me were hesitant to drive me to the airport because it was still early.

This was all very different to the environment I am used to here in Oregon.So this was a long-winded explanation for the purpose of my journey. Like I said before, read all of this with an open mind. I am not a political person. I don't consider myself to be Democrat or Republican. I am not embarrassed by the fact that I was illegal. If anything, I am a little proud because I believe it helped to shape my character. When you are born in the U.S. so many things are handed to you. As an American citizen you have many rights and opportunities. I am grateful that I can now live here legally, and pursue my goals.

In my next post I will write about my not so triumphant re-entry into Mexico.

Last day with family...,

2011-04-16T13:02:00.000-07:00

I head back to Juarez in the morning. My waiver appointment is on Monday, and I could be back in the States very soon.I wanted to take a minute and try to summarize my time with a quick post. Not to mention the fact that I will soon be leaving behind reliable internet.

As home sick as I am, I am really sad to be leaving my family. I can take comfort in the fact that after this process I will be able to visit them more regularly.I have had such a great time. These are people that I have not seen in over 20 years, but these past few weeks have made that fact insignificant.

They took me in, fed me, drove me everywhere, and they made this journey much easier. I was able to relax and not worry about my situation. It was such a contrast to what i felt while I was in Ciudad Juarez.
I think that is what is making me dread having to go back there.I think I have said over and over again that Mexico is such a different place than what I am used to. I am out of my comfort zone, but being reunited with my family has made my trip worthwhile.

My flight leaves very early in the morning which means that it is time for bed. Keep me in your prayers. Pray that my waiver will be accepted. Pray for a quick response. And pray for a safe trip home. Hopefully before the spring game.

Piramedes

2011-04-12T17:56:00.000-07:00

Click on the picture to view pictures from our family trip to the pyramids.
On Sunday we loaded the entire family into a van and made our way to the pyramids at Tehotihuacan. It was good family time. We walked and climbed a lot. There are two main pyramids. They are dedicated to the sun and the moon. We climbed both of the large pyramids as well as one smaller one. A family member was explaining to me that archeologists have discovered several pyramids within larger pyramids.

The natives used these pyramids as places of worship to different gods. When the weather or other conditions changed, the natives would build new pyramids dedicated to a new god. This made me think about the human condition, and how we are always searching for something to fill the void we feel.As Christians, we know that we can depend on God for all our needs. No matter what situation we find ourselves in, God is always there for us. This has been a comfort to me on my journey. Enjoy the pictures.

Mexico

2011-04-08T18:10:00.000-07:00

Click on the picture to view pictures from my home town and childhood home.

Childhood Pictures

2011-04-08T18:03:00.000-07:00

Click on the picture to see some pictures from my childhood. Included in the album are some pictures of my parents. Enjoy

Everything is in Spanish

2011-04-06T11:33:00.000-07:00

I finally have reliable, fast internet, and so much to write about, and I'm not really sure where to begin.
I expected Mexico to be different. I asked people about it, I looked at pictures, but nothing prepared me for the real thing.

I can't really figure out how to explain it. I have been in Mexico for a week now. In two different places, and those two places are very different from each other. As I write this, I am in Hidalgo my birthplace. It has been really great seeing my family for the first time in so many years. I left when I was very young, so my memories are very vague. But as I walked through my childhood home, things began to come back. It was a very special time.

We also spent some time looking at pictures of my childhood, which was also fun. I am really enjoying my time with family more than in Ciudad Juarez. While i was in Juarez I didn't really go out much, and i didn't talk to too many people. I do have to share that I happened to run into someone i knew from Corvallis. I had only met him once before, but it was the most random thing running into him. I think this helped both of us feel a little more comfortable.

We both noticed the differences in life and culture. For example, driving in Mexico is a completely different experience than in the U.S. People here are in a hurry to get wherever they are going, and they tend to be a little more aggressive. Turn signals seem to be optional most of the time. It has really been an adventure. i think it is all part of the experience.

Ciudad Juarez is not really a nice place. It has a reputation of being a dangerous place, and there was definitely an oppressive feeling in the city.Hidalgo has been a completely different experience all together. The people here are so friendly and nice. Part of my family lives near Tulancingo, which is a big city, and my grandparents live out in the country.

I am looking forward to spending time with them and getting to know them again. They have all been nice and welcoming. I have been able to feel more at ease. I know that even though i don't talk to them very much, i could go to any of their houses at any time, and be well received and treated. That is a good feeling to have.

The Journey Begins...

2011-03-28T17:57:00.000-07:00

I'm sitting in the beautiful Portland Airport waiting to board my flight. I went through airport security quickly and painlessly. I always hear about the nightmares that people have when boarding flights, but I have never really had any problems. I think different airports work differently, and Portland has to be one of the good ones.

Time really flew by. It was almost exactly a year ago that we began this seemingly endless process. The year turned into months, which turned into weeks, which turned into days, which turned into hours, and now here I am about to board an airplane. So many people said so many kind words that really touched and ministered my heart. One thing that stands out in my mind is a scripture that my pastor's wife gave to me. At the moment that she said it to me I knew in my heart that it was not her words, but God's word for me and my wife.

The scripture is Psalms 121

¹ I lift up my eyes to the mountains—
   where does my help come from?
² My help comes from the LORD,
   the Maker of heaven and earth.
³ He will not let your foot slip—
   he who watches over you will not slumber;
⁴ indeed, he who watches over Israel
   will neither slumber nor sleep.
⁵ The LORD watches over you—
   the LORD is your shade at your right hand;
⁶ the sun will not harm you by day,
   nor the moon by night.
⁷ The LORD will keep you from all harm—
   he will watch over your life;
⁸ the LORD will watch over your coming and going
   both now and forevermore.

This scripture is very powerful because it can be applied to any difficult situation that we may face.
Even now, as I read it again I have a sense of peace. I hope that this scripture can speak to your life.
see you all soon and keep in touch

I can't travel without my...

2011-03-25T12:45:00.000-07:00

I decided that I would dedicate a post to the various things that will make trip slightly easier. These are things that will make my stay in Mexico more comfortable.
6th Generation iPod Nano


6th Generation iPod Nano


Cool accessories

The first on my list is my ipod. I have owned several ipods through the years, and this little guy is the latest addition. The reason i chose this for the trip was the size. When you travel you have so many things to keep track of. My thought was that with a small ipod i could clip it on or wear it as a watch and not have to worry about it getting lost. It has 8 gigs, which is enough for what I need. I have found that music helps me relax when I'm on an airplane, and i listen to several podcasts. It has several nice features including a built in fm radio and a built in clip. They say the battery will last 24 hours of continuous playback. The screen is 1.5 inch display is tiny, but has great resolution and color. If you have the Apple headphones with control and microphone, you can control the ipod with voice commands. Link to the nano

Motorola Droid 2 Global

The second item is my phone. The Motorola Droid 2 Global. Several years ago I got into smarthphones, and this is my third one. I stared off with a blackberry curve, then a Motorola droid, and now the droid 2. I am rather fond of the android phones, and in my opinion Motorola makes the best. I wont go into too many of the technical details of this phone, but i will say that it is fast. the display is colorful and responsive and it is a good phone over all.

Obviously, the performance of a phone will depend on the network strength and other variables. One of the main reasons i got this phone was because of its global capabilities. in other words, it should work in other parts of the world that use different cell phone systems. I combined this with a Mexico calling plan from Verizon, and we should be good to go. The plan was not much more expensive than our current plan, and it will allow to talk to people in the U.S. without incurring any extra charges. Texting to Verizon customers is unlimited, which is important. There are many more great features to this phone. The Android app market also makes this and other Android phones popular. They may not have as may as the Apple app market, but the list is growing. These apps make your device much more than a cell phone. Motorola Droid 2 website

Acer Aspire One Netbook

Finally we have the Aspire One Netbook. I realized when I was shopping for one of these that they were slowly dying off thanks to the ipad and other tablets. And they should die off. Tablets are much better and more attractive. On the other hand, this costs half as much as any tablet, and it does most of the things that tablets do. I will use it to blog, surf the web, Facebook, and Skype. Netbooks have plenty of memory, but not as much as a regular laptop, but the advantage is size.

Features include, Intel Atom N455 processor, 250GB hard drive, 1GB system memory, and 10.1" widescreen. All packed into a package that is about an inch thick and weighs less than 5 lbs. It comes with windows 10 starter edition, but office max gave me a discount on an upgrade to windows 10 premium home edition. it has a built in webcam, which will help me keep in touch with friends and family.
Office max link

Miscellaneous:
Prescription sunglasses
Travel pillow
Travel iron
USB charger
Bible

Why I am writing this blog

2011-03-22T15:55:00.000-07:00

     On March 28th, 2011 I will be returning to Mexico for the first time since I was 5 years old. The main purpose of the trip is for a personal matter. I wont go into details about that aspect of the trip because it is complicated, and it it is not what the blog is about.

     The main purpose of this blog is to chronicle my journey, and to keep friends and family updated on my whereabouts and experiences. I will post pictures and maybe videos. The frequency of the updates will depend on the availability of internet access.

     I have less than one week before I leave, and I am getting more and more excited/nervous/anxious about the journey. Feel free to comment or ask question about my travels.