Nat The Fat Rat

Guide Us, O Thou Great Felicity

2010-07-29T21:52:00.000-07:00

Do you remember that episode of Felicity, when she was at graduation and Ben wrote that thing in her yearbook which caused her to abandon pre med at Stanford to follow him to New York? And then it turned out that Ben wasn't really interested in getting to know her at all, but that he liked the Pink Ranger instead, who also happened to be Felicity's first and only friend in the city, and then

The Night Before

2010-07-28T13:33:00.000-07:00

I was six and we were moving across the globe like a band of nomads. That night we slept on the floor of my childhood living room; a room full of boxes, sleeping bags and pillows, and the awful tangible feeling of imminent change. I fell asleep that night in a pink sleeping bag among the browns and mauves of the living room, and in the morning we flew across the seas to a land of spice and a

the problem with dogs as babies...

2010-07-25T22:24:00.000-07:00

is that dogs can't be babies not really, anyway babies can fly inside airplanes and be pushed inside strollers and taken to nice restaurants and worried and stressed over and nobody looks at you funny as long as your baby isn't a dog baby that is it's just not easy when your babies happen to be dogs is what i'm saying the problem with dogs as babies is that dogs can't be babies because that

Holbs Week: Won't You Be My Neighbor?

2010-07-20T22:51:00.000-07:00

This is possibly an exaggeration, but it seems that every time The Holbs sets foot out our front door he is absolutely accosted with love by our neighbors! The Holbs is world famous in Moscow for being the heart and soul behind The Fence. Ohh, The Fence! That bastion of manly craftsmanship! That gorgeous delight of pre-treated wood! Ladies in their late forties from our neighborhood love to

Holbs Week: Caulk-And-Bull

2010-07-20T19:49:00.000-07:00

I would have posted this yesterday, except that yesterday I was so beyond frustrated with my Holbsmover that the idea of saying anything nice about him at all actually hurt me deeply in my soul. All you Marrieds, I know you understand. There are a certain things that come along with a ginger stud of a Holbshusband like mine, in case you were wondering. They are acid indigestion, allergies to

Introducing! A Full Week of The Holbs!

2010-07-19T18:18:00.000-07:00

It happened yesterday afternoon. There I was, lying on the hard floor of the bathroom, watching streaks of water trickle down the mirrors and walls as I inhaled giant gulping breaths of hot, humid air. And then, it finally happened. I mean, it didn't happen when I was croaking orders at The Holbs from the living room to not pack the cups or silverware! while he was wrapping up for storage my (

New York Natalie, Day Four

2010-07-16T00:07:00.000-07:00

Shhh, do you hear that? That whooshing noise? That is the sound of two people who are almost done packing, and who have argued and negotiated and finally agreed to sell or donate more than half of their belongings, finally exhaling as the end is in sight. More than half of their belongings, I said! Heavenly gravy, but it has been an athletic event! My kitchen is empty, save for one cupboard.

New York Natalie, Day Three

2010-07-15T00:00:00.000-07:00

On Monday night the Moscow winds blew in gusts of dust and pollen, turning me for the past two days into a ticking sneeze bomb. My throat burns like a cast iron pan. You can tell where I have been by the trails of tissues littering the floors, and on more than one occasion I have startled both the fetus and the dogs awake with my righteous sneezing. So I will cut to the chase. Here is day three

New York Natalie, Day Two

2010-07-14T00:00:00.000-07:00

"Do you know what is ridiculous?" my Holbspacker asked me today. To which I shoved a cinnamon bear in my mouth and waited most patiently for his response. "Packing . . . with a pregnant woman." Oh, but he is right! Here he is, filling box after box, his poor hands black with newspaper print and riddled with cardboard paper cuts, while I'm momentarily spaced out by the window contemplating

New York Natalie, Day One

2010-07-13T00:00:00.000-07:00

My house is a mess. Boxes are stacked five feet high behind the couch. The Yard Sale pile has grown so big it might eat Peter Pan! Our conversations are a never ending variation of: "Are you sure you need to keep this?" "Yes." "I want you to let me sell it." "No." "But, can't you just replace it?" (Cue hormone-induced fireworks.) Packing is hard! Earlier tonight The Holbs rifled through our

One Hand In The Air For The Big City

2010-07-12T00:13:00.000-07:00

me and my city, back when i was just a baby On Wednesday of last week, we sold our house. On Thursday of last week, we started packing our boxes for DC, land of Georgetown University, the second-ranked LLM program in the country. But then on Friday . . . (and this is just what happens when you are married to a Holbs, you understand--you will have perfectly wonderful plans, things finally

Back In The USSR

2010-07-09T00:38:00.000-07:00

Peter Pan is waiting -- for you? You should sit down for this one. Apparently, we may have sold our house. You're shocked! (Me too!) With this news we finally felt ready to face our uncertain futures, so we came back to Moscowtown this afternoon, The Holbs and two smelly dogs and a wife and a fetus, to set about the business of packing up the things of a tiny little family. (Only problem: we

So, It Turns Out

2010-07-07T00:19:00.000-07:00

Six months in and you know what? I kind of love it. So, it turns out I can march myself over to the General Office of Awesomeness and demand my Awesome At Being Pregnant card back, and also possibly request an upgrade. But would you like to know why? Well, what we all thought was dehydration and exhaustion was actually--wait for it--a kidney stone. Isn't that perfectly dramatic? Yes, a kidney

Have A Great Weekend!

2010-07-02T00:02:00.000-07:00

Hamburger or Hot Dog, friends?This is an important question. (As for me and my house, we will choose the hot dog.Heavy on the sauerkraut, please.)

Life With Boys

2010-06-30T23:56:00.000-07:00

In a complete reversal of life as I know it, we are completely outnumbered in this Lovin house, us Lovin girls are. With my two sisters gone, there are three boy doggies, three big, hulking boys, one boy-in-training, and two delicate lady flowers. Us girls, we never stood a chance. I am using this time to conduct some good, solid research. After all, in something stupid like sixteen weeks I am

Peter Pan, Two Minutes In The Life

2010-06-29T00:00:00.000-07:00

Presenting, Pan The Man, an artful exhibit of Photo and Prose. I Pete, Therefore, I Pan. Hello! And behold as I scratch my chin in masterful strokes!Do you not admire this view of my very manly parts? Do you not appreciate my lithe form as I scratch mine ears? And, I rest. What, pray tell, are you staring at? Behold! I come when I am called! For I am certain this man hath treats!

The Woozy Doozy

2010-06-28T00:45:00.000-07:00

a dramatic photo for a dramatic story Well, the good news is, I passed out at an Anthropologie. Really, passing out at an Anthropologie is far more dignified than passing out at, say, an Old Navy. Don't you think so? I think that's just sound logic. (Can you imagine passing out at a Walmart? Good heavens!) (Also, fainting in an Anthropologie? Haven't we all considered it? At least once?) But

The Rat Recommends

2010-06-26T19:24:00.000-07:00

Friends! I have two items of business for you today. Are you ready? Item the First -- Have you seen my new sponsor? (It's right there, on your right!) So Megan Romo, my bloggie friend and HTML guardian angel, has a really fantastic shop called Logophilia that you are going to LOVE. This is my new favorite: Megan is stinking talented, it's sort of sickening, and her prints are incredibly

Oh, Is It Friday?

2010-06-25T00:00:00.000-07:00

Our Vintage Pearl winner is . . . Weezie! Congratulations, Weezie! Your jewelry collection is now $50 cuter than yesterday! To Everybody Else: You didn't win, how rude! But was it fun? Should I have these more often? As a consolation prize, remind me that I promised to tell you the story about how today in traffic an old man almost drove into us, and my mom shouted at

A Cautionary Tale

2010-06-23T22:47:00.000-07:00

I will remember exactly where I was and what I was doing the first time I saw them for the rest of my life. (Mostly because it is a food item and I was at a grocery store doing grocery-shopping-type-things, but let us not get tied up in the mundane details, please.) Yes, I will remember exactly where I was and what I was doing the first time I saw them because a vision of this type and

I've Had The Time Of My Holbs

2010-06-23T00:17:00.000-07:00

It is true, and not at all an exaggeration, for me to tell you that The Holbs is having the time of his life these days. The time of his life! Oh, but allow me to explain! First, there is the matter of the World Cup. Tell me. Have you lost your husband to the World Cup? I have lost my husband to the World Cup. He is dead to me. Lost to World Cup Heaven. I am a World Cup Widow and I am here to

GIVEAWAAAAAAAAY!!

2010-06-22T00:00:00.000-07:00

Click HERE to access the Giveaway! (Comments on both postings will count for the giveaway, sorry for the confusion!)

What I Learned From My Dad

2010-06-20T23:08:00.000-07:00

Growing up I had my head absolutely filled with pearls of delicious wisdom I am sure, courtesy of my dear old dad. Never trust a Kevin Costner fan, is one that I may forever regret ignoring, Holbsy baby. The only problem is, I can only seem to recall one nugget of fatherly advice with any regularity, and, well, it is hardly terribly useful, unfortunately. When I was 18 and driving to BYU for

Welcome To My Blog, Where It Is Fun And Rainbows Every Day!

2010-06-18T00:00:00.000-07:00

And lo, the day dawned angry and irritable, the kind of day that never deserves to exist, the kind of day that makes you feel like possibly the gods hate you, you and your family, and also your family's family. **DISCLAIMER: The following post is self-indulgent, whiny, pathetic, and entirely not of good report or praiseworthy. Please proceed at your own risk.** First it was cold and grouchy

On Moving (Moving On)

2010-06-17T00:00:00.000-07:00

Oh, Moscow. Moscow, I know what you're doing. You want to make it so I can't wait to leave you, don't you Moscow? First you make it so we can't sell our house, so we have to chop the price by fifteen thousand just so somebody will look at it, and then you dump rain all over me and pretend like this is completely normal for June. Moscow, I'm not buying it. I know what you're doing.