I was chatting to Ben recently about how much I miss blogging, miss this little corner of the internet that’s mine to muse, noodle and potter in. Instagram Stories are lovely, but I feel like it’s the difference between jotting something down on a post it and writing in a journal; the former is quickly lost, forgotten, discarded.

I was trying to untangle why exactly I haven’t been posting as much since having Ari. Sure, there’s lack of time – will there ever be enough time, with a toddler to feed, play with, nap and clean and support? – but it’s more than that. 

This space has always been about chasing my curiosity. It started, many moons ago, as a photo blog back when I was a hobbyist with a shiny new dSLR. That went on to become my career. It continued with a love for interiors and homewares, which helped me land a job at the beautiful Image Interiors & Living, where I became editor a few years later. 

My mantra for blogging and for work was always the same – do I find this interesting? If the answer was yes, I enjoyed going down these rabbit holes and sharing what I had learned. I have a post-it that’s been stuck to every computer I have worked on since my days at KISS mag, and it’s a quote from the late, great Professor Aidan Moran, a psychology lecturer I had in college at UCD who I was lucky enough to interview for a feature about career advice some years later. He said (and I badly paraphrase): “Don’t ask yourself ‘Am I smart enough?’, ask yourself, ‘Am I interested enough?'” I used this as a litmus test when thinking about making dramatic job changes – whether it was leaving a dream job editing a teen mag to join an interiors title despite massive imposter syndrome, or joining a start up, a software dev studio, a tech company.

I also used it as encouragement whenever I got blogger’s imposter syndrome over the years. Who was I to be blogging about interiors back in 2011, when I had zero qualifications? About photography when I still couldn’t figure out white balance? It made me realise it was enough to just share what I had learned, what I curious about it.

Which brings me to now. Since having Ari, I have wandered down a many a fascinating parenting rabbit hole. I have explored and read deeply about calm parenting, simplicity parenting, Montessori, Waldorf, forest schools, and a whole host of other topics that I found eye-opening and enjoyable to learn about. It ticked the curiosity box. But I was really reluctant to post about all of it here, and left literally dozens of posts languishing in drafts. Why? Because parenting is so personal. So open to debate, so full of sensitive subjects. There are so many opinions out there already. I hated the thought of anyone reading a post of mine and feeling judged for their choices, just as much as I hated the idea of receiving judgment for my choices. How you choose to parent is such a deeply personal decision. 

It also didn’t feel entirely fair to our family, to Ben and to Ari, to be exploring these topics so publicly. While my love of mid century furniture is a passion of mine Ben happily indulges, it felt different to openly discuss parenting decisions and how they affected the tiny, brilliant human we share a life with. It felt kind of raw, sensitive. 

And of course, I could always share other things. But having a baby was such a huge blow to my creativity and productivity, I often felt there was little else to share. I second guessed myself a lot. I felt angry, and bitter about the time I was “losing”, feeling ugly envy well up whenever I saw peers moving ahead, accomplishing wonderful things. And yet I felt equally protective of this time with Ari, who was changing at lightning speed, and resented pressure to “get back to normal” when I had no clue what our new normal was. I felt like a spinning compass, unsure as to what direction I wanted to go in.

It threw everything up in the air and, only now that Ari is two, and the baby fog has lifted somewhat, do I feel the dust is settling and I see some kid of a path forward. A way of exploring without feeling I’m sharing more than is mine to share. Shoots of other interests. New ideas, new questions, new values. 

I’d love for this post to coincide with a fancy new blog design, but 5am toddler wake up calls do not lend themselves kindly to long nights spent making blog theme tweaks, so that’ll have to wait. 

If you’re still reading, thanks for sticking around. 

Both pics by Ben, from a batch of film we recently got developed. 

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First things first: I am not buying that this is the ideal time to be hyper productive or creative. Things are, once again, strange and unsettled and I truly think now is the time to go gentle on ourselves and appreciate that our productivity, energy and headspace may be about to take another severe hit. In saying that, if you’re anything like me, your energy has ebbed and flowed. There are days when keeping busy and making things brings me peace and calm and days when not much gets done at all. So you might enjoy this sweet and simple DIY – a fun thing to make on those ‘keep busy’ days, and you can still enjoy it on the go slow ones. Some of the bits you’ll have at home and some you should be easily able to pick up online. 

Lesiele Juliet – my DIY creative partner in crime – created everything here, including the lovely hand-letter labels. Earlier this year I used her exact method to make little egg candles for easter and it worked beautifully. 

You’ll need 

• Glass jars (you can recycle old jars you have at home – the perfect container is those small glass yoghurt pots)
• Premium candle wick (we got ours from Evans Art Supplies, €0.75/m)
• Wick sustainers (Evans Art Supplies €0.85/pk of 10)
• Beeswax (white beaded) (Evans Art Supplies 500g for €15.35)
• Clothes pegs
• Scissors
• Pyrex jug
• Large stainless steel pot (it needs to be big enough to comfortable hold the pyrex jug)
• Essential oils of your choice (we went with lavender)

Method

Step 1: Thread the candle wick through the wick sustainer. 

Step 2: Measure the length of the wick against the jar you’re using, add around 5cm at the top, and trim. 

Step 3: Tie off the candle wick with a knot at the bottom of the sustainer, trimming any excess so that it sits as flat as possible. 

Step 4: Clip the wick through a peg and wrap it around the peg, then place peg on top of the jar to keep the wick centred and in position while you pour.

Step 5: Using another jar, measure two cups of wax per jar and pour into the Pyrex jug. 

Step 6: Place the Pyrex jug into a stainless steel pot filled with boiling hot water. The water should reach halfway up the jug. Make sure not to go any further, as you’ll risk getting water inside the wax, which will spoil it. 

Step 7: Once the wax is melted, carefully pour into the jar until it is half full. Use the peg to balance the wick sustainer, ensuring it stays in the centre of the jar.

Step 8: After you have poured halfway, add in 1-2 drops of your chosen essential oil (one drop for a small jar, two drops for a medium sized jar). Then, pour in the rest of wax.

Step 9: Once wax is poured in, check that the peg is centred and the wick is in the middle. Leave to set, which should roughly take 2-3 hours, depending on the type of wax you use (check the pack instructions for specific details).

And that’s it! Let me know if you give it a try or have any questions (which I’ll swiftly pass on to Lesiele, ha!).

DIY and styling: Lesiele Juliet
Photography: Nathalie Marquez Courtney
First published in Irish Country Magazine.

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He hasn’t met a puddle he doesn’t like to splash in, a dog or cat he doesn’t love to point out, a stone he doesn’t want to hear go “plop” into the sea. Says a cheery “hello day!” and excitedly tugs at the bedroom curtains as Ben and I blearily stare at the clock, praying it’s closer to 6am than to 5am. Breakfast is porridge and berries, or yoghurt and granola or scrambled eggs and a smoothie, all words he can now miraculously say. 

These days, Ben and I find ourselves constantly looking at each other over his head, delighting in his delight, his unabashed excitement and love of the world. Is there anyone more in the moment than a toddler? In my most mindful of meditation sessions I’ll never be close to being as present as Ari is every minute of every day. 

We kicked off the month celebrating his second birthday with a visit to my mum’s in Cork for cake and treats (and trucks!) with his cousins. He slept most of the way there and back, so now keeps asking for us to go to “Nana’s house”, not realising it’s almost three hours away. My mum and sis threw him a gorgeous circus-themed party, complete with candy floss, popcorn, bubbles and a toddler-friendly piñata (instead of bashing it to oblivion, you take turns pulling a string until the treats pop out).

We then returned to Galway and celebrated his actual birth day with two visiting friends and their almost two year old kiddo. Cue visits to the aquarium, an insanely giddy train ride, and – by some miracle – matching pram naps which allowed us parents to peacefully tuck into takeaway Dough Bros pizzas in Eyre Square. We rounded the fun-filled week off with a toddler-free double date night in Kai (followed by cheese and cocktails at The Universal), some trips to the beach and, finally, a visit to the gorgeous Bridgit’s Garden.

If I stop and think about how quickly he is growing, how little of the baby there is left in him, I get close to tears so I try not to. Instead, I try to relish in his growth, and share his happiness at his newfound abilities – his “squeezy” hugs, his two-footed hops off the pavement, how he whispers “slowly, slowly” to himself as he carefully carries a something from the kitchen to the living room, how his Ts come out as Fs (making us peal with laughter every time he points out the “dump truck” toy in our neighbour’s garden), how he excitedly recaps little bits to his day to Ben before he falls asleep.

And yes, houses are messy, the laundry pile is endless, there is never enough sleep, there is always a dishwasher to fill or empty, snacks to make, tiny socks to pick up. Weaning is impossible, and emotions (his and ours) can run high at any point really.

But at the end of another exhausted day, the lows don’t come close to the highs and Ben and I nearly always end the night chatting about what new thing Ari did, said or discovered. It’s such a treat to get to see the world through his eyes and get to hold his hand as he explores it. 

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We got lucky with our rental house, in that it’s near beautiful woods and beaches, but alas both of those are closed at the moment leaving us with seemingly bland suburban roads and few open green spaces, neither of which are particularly toddler-friendly. However, in the past few weeks I’ve seen small pockets of nature explode everywhere.

Slowing down to really look at what’s growing by the side of the road, on bushes, trees and even pavement cracks makes even the most boring 2km come alive. A hedgerow walk is like a mini mindfulness exercise, grounding you in the here and now while also helping you get to know your local flora and fauna a bit better.

On our recent walk, we popped Ari on my back for the first part of it (we’re still using the Boba X carrier), let him run around wherever it was safe to do so and then napped him in the pram on the walk home. 

Here are some tips that helped us, they might work for you. 

Bring whatever camera you have

Whatever you’ve got at home will work, whether it’s your phone, an SLR, an old hand-held digital camera or something like an Instax. The aim is to bring something that encourages you to slow down and take a closer look at things.

You can freestyle and simply shoot whatever catches your eye or give yourself a theme to explore (for example, everything you stand on during your walk, from grey pavements to dandelion-strewn grass) or even stick to a specific colour (kids love this!). If you have any kind of zoom or macro feature, use to get as close as possible and completely fill the frame with your subject.

Play with depth of field too – I’m definitely usually a ‘wide open’ gal, favouring open apertures that blur the background and make whatever you have focused on pop. But, perhaps inspired by our lockdown life (or maybe it’s the Jamie Beck effect), on a recent walk I found myself wanting to create shots that captured as much detail as possible  – every line on every leaf and every tiny petal (that buttercup pic, above left, was shot at f14). 

I firmly believe that the best camera is the one you have with you , so if you feel like yours isn’t great, stick to exploring lines and composition or playing with negative space (the above shots were all taken and edited on my phone). 

Learn about what you’re looking at

I’ve been blown away by the variety of flowers and foliage in our neighbourhood. Sure, there are daisies, buttercups and dandelions aplenty, but also delicate bluebells, the soft white blooms of three-cornered leek (edible!), pretty purple mother of thousands tumbling between over a stone wall and, if you’re lucky, wild garlic (wild garlic pesto is one of my Very Favourite Things. Donal has a great recipe here). 

If you want to learn more about what you come across, the Picture This app is pure magic – it uses AI to help you identify flowers, trees, leaves and weeds with just a quick snap. There’s also a handy list of Irish wildflowers found in urban areas here.

The last time my nephew came to stay with us (pre-lockdown), we gave him a little clipboard and some paper and a pencil and he loved making a nature walk list of things he wanted to see, ticking things off as we found them (Pinterest also has lots of handy printable nature hunt PDFs).

Become an urban birder 

Birds are another fun thing to spot in your garden or on your walks. We bought a few feeders from CJ Wildlife at Christmas and they came with this lovely little poster that helps you identify the different species. The Irish Times has a beautifully illustrated guide to garden birds as well and National Botanical Gardens released a fun garden bird bingo PDF too.

If you feel bitten by the bird bug (which I certainly have been since returning to live in Ireland), there are few books you might enjoy: The Genius of Birds and How to Be an Urban Birder (which, improbably, features an intro from Jamie Oliver!).

Pick a hedgrow bouquet 

Goes without saying, don’t nick anything from private or community gardens! I foraged this little collection of blooms and greens (along with some three-cornered leek) just outside our estate, at the side of a busy connecting road to brighten up my desk and remind me of what’s waiting for me next time I head outside. 

And that’s it! Would love to know if you’ve gone on a wander or a forage and to hear about what you’ve found in your area. 

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Problem was, I now had less time than ever before – to take “proper” pics with my SLR, to sort or process them or to print and get them framed or put them into albums.

I quickly realised that the first thing I was going to have to let go of was my perfectionist steak and propensity for tinkering away at something endlessly – Ari just grew and changed too fast for that. So I started trying to figure out what I could do with just my phone. Here are a few things that helped:

• I edited pics using the Lightroom iOS app instead of filters (which can be a bit heavy handed for print). This also doubled as a storage place for pics I wanted to print.
• If I did take shots on my SLR, sometimes I speedily transferred them to my phone using the Canon Camera Connect app
• Finally, I used the Artifact Uprising app to order batches of prints and even design photobooks. It really helped remove the friction of actually uploading and ordering prints. 

Here are some of the things I’ve made (none of the below sponsored or gifted, by the way, I just like the print quality of Artifact Uprising’s products. I’ve also used Blurb and Photobox in the past, and they’ve worked great too):

Photobooks

I first used the AU app to create a little photobook of Ari’s first trip to Dublin when he was just four months old (the top book in the pic above). They were mainly phone snaps, but I know I wouldn’t have gotten around to actually processing and uploading them and it’s such a treasured little memento now of when he first met some of our very favourite people. Ari loves leafing through it with me as I point out who everyone is. 

Then, when things were a little less hectic and we got our evenings back, I did sit down and properly put together a photobook on last summer and our adventures around Portugal (the yellow book above, from the AU colour series), which again, is even more special now. I think that’s true of every printed photo, right? It almost doubles in sentimental value as soon as your life changes in any meaningful way. 

Photo baby board book

For Christmas, we got Ari this adorable little board book featuring snaps of our extended family (including our cat) – Ari adores looking through them all, naming his cousins as we go.

Unframed DIY gallery wall

And finally, instead of waiting to get around to framing prints, I hung these shots (from Artifact Uprising’s Everyday Prints set) from some twine suspended from a eucalyptus branch to brighten a bare wall in our Lisbon apartment. 

I hope that was useful! I’d love to know if you have any tips or tricks for printing pics out. 

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My toddler’s golden curl. Our resident back garden blackbird. The shells we picked at the beach on Mother’s Day (not knowing it would be our last outing past 2km for some time). Sunset over our little corner of suburbia. 

While tag team parenting and working with a toddler are no picnic, there’s nothing like a tiny person to keep you grounded in the present moment. We’ve been doing pretty much the same things I see so many others doing, and that alone feels heartening: lots of baking (banana bread, carrot cake, lemon drizzle cake, flapjacks…), video chats with fiends and family, drinking tea, lots of cooking and cleaning on repeat and golden hour strolls around our estate before bedtime. 

Here are a few other fun things I’ve been enjoying:

• Books to get lost in: The lush richness of Where the Crawdads Sing, the sweet, evocative twists and turns of The Scent Keeper, the brilliant, prescient wisdom of How to do Nothing. 
• Movies and shows worth watching: For fun and suspense –  Knvies Out; for beauty and perspective (and to nerd out on cinematography) – 1917; for uplifting inspiration – Self-Made; for love and laughs – The Long Shot.
• Cute crafts: Love this Billie Eilish colouring book and I had such a lovely time with these free colouring pages from Ambivalently Yours.

How are you holding up?

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“In my own worst seasons I’ve come back from the colorless world of despair by forcing myself to look hard, for a long time, at a single glorious thing: a flame of red geranium outside my bedroom window. And then another: my daughter in a yellow dress. And another: the perfect outline of a full, dark sphere behind the crescent moon. Until I learned to be in love with my life again.”

– High Tide in Tucson by Barbara Kingsolver

Relocating from Lisbon to Galway hasn’t been without its ups and downs (ups: walks on the prom, fruit scones, exploring the beautiful West of Ireland. Downs: lonely days solo parenting, having to wrap Ari in a gazillion layers to go out, a dearth of custard tarts).

Moving – whether it be to a new house, new city or new country – sort of throws your whole life up in the air, and it can take time for the pieces to fall back into place. You have to work to build a life you love again, bit by bit.

Finding your favourite bread, your go-to Saturday coffee spot, a home for keys, and pens and nail clippers. Discovering what room gets the light when, how to jiggle the back door just so, when the 15.05 bus actually arrives. All of these things take time, and that can come with its fair share of frustrations. 

But on the flip side of all that trying to turn the new into the familiar, comes glorious exploration and fresh discoveries. Barna Woods is one such spot.

 
Like something out of a Tolkien novel, it’s a place of magical, moss-covered woodlands. There are higgledy piggledy stone bridges, plenty of splashy puddles and glorious fresh streams that Ari adored. Better yet, it’s a short bus or 5-minute drive from our front door.

On a recent trip there, we were serenaded by this tiny-but-mighty robin on our way back –  a warm welcome if ever I heard one. 

First pic of the woods in all their gorgeous dappled glory by Ben.

*This is the first in a series of posts on Galway, and our discoveries here. Hit me up with any recommendations!

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Listening to Semisonic’s Dan Wilson discussing Closing Time on Song Exploder led me down a delightful internet rabbit hole that included this brilliant compilation of advice – ostensibly aimed at songwriters, but there are so many gems there that could be applied to any creative work. 

Speaking of podcasts, this episode of Hurrly Slowly on “holding space for yourself” (without the expectation of productivity) is brilliant. 

I’m currently taking part in Erin Loechner’s A Year of Reflection journaling course and loving it so far. I always mean to journal, but get caught up and distracted by methods, by getting the right notebook, finding the perfect conditions. Her super simple approach still manages to somehow be profoundly good.

Ask Again, Yes is the first book I’ve finished this year and it blew me away, in a sort of soft, quiet way. 

Speaking of blown away, any one else getting stuck into Watchmen? Wow, on on so many levels. Also just finished episode one of Modern Love and it was very sweet and tender. 

“Do not ask your children to strive for extraordinary lives“: Need to get these beautiful words on a print.

Some bits on my wishlist: Annie Atkins’ book on creating graphics for filmmaking | this Greta tee | this cool Bill Withers print | this long-sleeved dress with the dreamiest Peter Pan collar | this ridiculously cute ceramic Frida pot 

Top: Love the smooth shape of these stones, snapped on my phone during a windy Sunday walk along the beautiful Salthill promendade. 

Have a great weekend!

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I’ve had this little corner of the internet for over 10 years. At various points in my life the posts have been a trickle or a rushing stream but one thing remains the same: I love having them. They’re like a digital scrapbook of where my head and heart were at.

While I love the immediacy and casualness of Insta stories, ultimately, they are fun places to visit – the blog is home base. 

Post frequency probably never reduced as dramatically as when Ari was born. I could for sure blame new parent fatigue, and the tornado that is a new baby. But it was more than that.

Everything felt too close to the surface to talk about. I wrote a couple of pieces (published in TheJournal and Image Magazine), but lots of it was just too new, too raw, too overwhelming to really process and package up in a neat little post with a pretty header shot.

While I feel no closer to having the answers – and actually more sure than ever that there aren’t any “right” ones – I feel surer of myself and my interests as a parent and a person to dip my toe back in. 

I’ve seen other parents talk about this; the creative desert that can follow having a baby. It makes sense in a way – so much of your self is nourishing this little being, literally and figuratively, no wonder everything else lies fallow. But, without stretching the metaphor too far, that break has resulted in what feels like better, surer soil.

I feel thirsty again, curious and open and excited to share, document and explore. 

So in that spirit, here’s what I hope to talk about in the coming months:

• Nesting and decorating a rental. For a myriad of reasons, a “forever home” may be a long way off, so we’ll do as much as we can with what we have, which right now is a lovely house on the outskirts of Galway.
• Flexible work. There are so many new ways of working – and new tools and approaches needed to do it well – and it’s an area I’m really enjoying exploring (a piece on parenting and flexible work ran in the December issue of Image)
• Creative collaborations and side projects (often with seriously awesome women I’m lucky to call collaborators). 
• Creating a Montessori-inspired home on a budget and parenting stuff in general.
• Fun finds and nerdy internet shiz.
• Life in Galway and exploring our new neighbourhood (not to mention the whole beautiful West of Ireland!)

I also have a few posts featuring some recent photography work too, which I’m looking forward to sharing.

As always, thanks for sticking around.

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I’m reading Balanced and Barefoot at the moment, all about the huge benefits of unrestricted outdoor play and it’s been really eye-opening. Writes author Angela J. Hanscom:

“Moving around in nature offers many new challenges to the mobile baby. Instead of the continuous smooth surface that most indoor environments offer, crawling and creeping outdoors offers a rich and varied sensory experience(…) In nature, children learn to take risks, overcome fears, make new friends, regulate emotions, and create imaginary worlds.”⠀

While we’re still at the grass-isn’t-for-eating stage, the book has motivated me to ensure we spent as much time outdoors as possible. As we live in a small fourth floor apartment, getting outdoors usually means hitting up a local park. Sometimes, Ari just hangs out on the picnic blanket, taking the world in. Other times, he tentatively crawls off it, pulling at the grass, examining twigs and yes, often trying to put whatever he finds into his mouth!

Luckily Lisbon doesn’t disappoint on the public park front – here are four of our favourite places:

Eduardo VII

There’s lots to do here – scope for water lilies and turtles around Linha d’Água, hang out under trees or at the playgrounds (one has a zip line), enjoy a drink at the kiosk or a pizza Central Parque Quiosque,  take in the beautiful azuelo tiles at the Carlos Lopes Pavilion or of course admire the view across the city from the miradouro (above).

Estrela gardens

One of the nicest parks in the city. Lots beautiful, huge trees throwing gorgeous dappled light around and a fab playground (with baby swings, which the Eduardo VII park sadly doesn’t have). There is also a pond and plenty of feathered friends flying and waddling around. 

Gulbenkian Gardens

I love aimlessly wandering around here, amidst the jungle-like bamboo, winding pathways and small lakes. You need to be careful with littles here, as there is lots of water and very diverse plantlife around, but it is a gorgeous place to spend a few hours (and perhaps be tempted to visit Ground Burger for a bite afterwards).

Monsanto Forest Park

A short bus ride away from our apartment lies “Lisbon’s lung”, a huge forest park. We’ve only explored a tiny bit of it, but what we’ve seen so far we’ve loved – dozens of playgrounds, each one different to the other, pretty picnic areas, a cool cafe and fun looking adventure zone for older kids. 

I’ve created a Google Map listing the above spots, should you be visiting any time soon. I’ll add to Let me know if you do!

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