Nathan R. Hale

Enough by Patrick Rhone

admin — Thu, 22 Mar 2012 13:40:41 +0000

I’ve followed Patrick Rhone‘s work for years now because he just keeps coming out with awesome. Also, he’s just a great human being.

Patrick is one of only a few writers out there speaking intelligently and thoughtfully on how real people interact with technology. Equal parts philosophical musing and practical advice, Rhone’s most recent book, Enough, explores what it means to find that balance between too little and too much in life. You’ll notice this work doesn’t just address social media and gadgets; Patrick brings unique insight on existing mindfully into multiple spheres of life. Enough is as useful and applicable as it is a pleasure to read.

Enough prompted me to pause and ponder the implications of what I have and what I need in new and fresh ways. I know it will do the same for you, too.

Buy the book and find out more here.

Lancelot Andrews Press BCP

admin — Sun, 18 Mar 2012 23:29:19 +0000

Since we began worshiping with an Anglican church, I’ve been extremely interested in the history and various incarnations of the Anglican liturgical standard, the Book of Common Prayer. The definitive edition is the 1662 BCP, which also serves as the doctrinal standard for most orthodox Anglicans.

Based on some recommendations by some fellow Anglican friends, I picked up the Lancelot Andrews Press Book of Common Prayer for a mere $15 shipped.

This edition of the Book of Common Prayer is not authorized by any recognized Anglican body that I am aware of, but is an effort by the publisher to create a version of the 1662 BCP that is conformable to Orthodox theology. The target audience for an edition like this would be Orthodox parishes looking to worship with a Western liturgy, or Anglican congregations that find themselves leaning a little toward the East.

First, let’s talk about the physical book itself. For a $15-$30 volume, I think you get your money’s worth. The soft cover is a nice, red “leatherlike” substance with gold accents. About the size of most standard thinline Bibles, the Lancelot Andrews Press BCP text block is trimmed in red. It’s a good looking book, and my washed-out cell-phone photos below don’t do it justice. On the inside, the paper is sufficiently opaque and the type is clear and easy to read. Rubrics are in red, and–although they border on being too light–are not difficult to parse.

I’ve only really spent time examining the liturgy for morning and evening prayer, so I can’t comment on all the theological tweaks and liturgical alterations, but I can say this: except for the Marian hymns and prayers that are added, Evening and Morning Prayer are virtually identical to the classical 1662 forms. Readers will also find that the Nicene Creed is printed without the filioque, and the date of Easter conforms to the understanding of the Orthodox church. This edition does not include the Articles of Religion. Read more about the changes from the publisher (warning: PDF link).

This really seems like a great devotional resources for both Anglican and Orthodox Christians. The form factor makes sharing the book with someone else for prayers very easy. I also really like the simplified liturgies for family worship, and I find the Orthodox theological nuances educational, at the least, and edifying in many places.

You can get one here.

A Talk From Francis Chan

admin — Sat, 21 Jan 2012 18:12:03 +0000

Yesterday I was present at a talk by famous author and pastor Francis Chan. His book Crazy Love changed the trajectory of my Christian life and ministry, so I was truly looking forward to hearing him speak. Here are some brief notes from the talk.

Right off the bat:

If you’ve come to hear from Francis Chan, and not God, you’re here for the wrong reasons. He is what we pursue.

Well, that was convicting because I’m pretty sure I went looking forward to a Francis Chan sermon, not expecting or asking for God to speak to me.http://nathanrhale.com/2012/01/21/a-talk-from-francis-chan/

He spoke on the idea that the Holy Spirit comes and empowers in special ways primarily in times of crisis when Christians are on mission. Examples included the Spirit descending on the disciples in Acts as well as Elijah’s confrontation with the priests of Baal.

He talked about the experience of Korean missionaries imprisoned by the Taliban, who say it was a time of great closeness to Christ that they sometimes wish they could even return to.

Quote:

If you were a sheep, and Jesus was your shepherd (as in Psalm 23) wouldn’t you sometimes want to go through the Valley of the Shadow of Death just to see what Jesus would do?”

As always, Francis comes across as incredibly sincere, and as someone who has a heart of obedience to Christ. He spoke the great importance of all Christians to be making disciples–if we are complaining about not being fed enough by our pastor, he says, it may be time to “man up,” feed yourself if you’ve been equipped to do so, and go to work making disciples. Otherwise you are keeping yourself in spiritual infancy.

Chan says the Holy Spirit in Acts is the same Holy Spirit today, and he calls us live out the mission of going into the world and making disciples. This will bring us into socially awkward situations and perhaps even physical danger, but this is where we see God, in obedience. If we don’t see parallels between
our life and lives of the early Christians in Acts, something is wrong.

Very challenging, but his word on making disciples rings true. Am I being obedient to Christ, not just unto death, but even unto social awkwardness? Do I look at my relationships with friends, family, and my children as opportunities to make disciples? Am I willing to take an active role in seeking out the lost? Is something wrong if I don’t I have the time to search out God’s will via prayer and soaking in the Scriptures?

These are the questions I came away with.

A Minimal XFCE Desktop

admin — Sat, 31 Dec 2011 22:09:36 +0000

Although I’ll go on record as saying that I think the Ubuntu Unity concept is a good one, it’s not excellently executed. In fact, even in this latest Ubuntu release (version 11.10) it is still sluggish, slow to respond, and buggy. If there’s one thing that really gets old to me, it’s a computer that can’t really keep up when I have to get work done. I’m not talking about super strenuous stuff (I don’t edit HD video for living) but simple web browsing and file management. It’s not cool when If feel like I’m fighting my computer to launch an application or switch tasks. Unfortunately, this what I often ended up doing in Unity when ever things got a bit more complex than one or two browser windows open.

So, I did what many other Ubuntu users have been doing…I switched back a “traditional” desktop in the form of XFCE, an environment I’ve used often in the past. I’ve customized the setup so that it’s drastically different from the default Xubntu/XFCE configuration, stripping out everything I could think of that didn’t directly contribute to how I use my computer. What you’ll find is that I took out almost every kind of launcher, widget, and dock and settled on single, simple task bar the top of my screen to use for monitoring the essentials. My ultimate task bar currently has four components:

The Places plugin

1) The Places Plugin for XFCE. This allows me to quickly open my bookmarks as well as mount and unmount removable media with little hassle. I also love that it includes a handy recent documents list.

2) Window buttons. Does what it says on the tin. I like the dock paradigm, but I also like how easy it is to differentiate between my windows at a glance with this traditional setup. Works just as well, if not better than dock for me most of the time.

3) Notification area. Notice there’s no clock. I rarely need a clock on my screen since I wear a watch and have my phone with me all the time. A clock can also be distracting, offering something else to think about than the task at han d. So, I’m performing an experiment and doing without for a bit. The rest of the items there are what I judge to be the bear minimum of stuff monitor consistently: Dropbox status, network, battery, and sound volume.

4) Desktop switcher. I debate about this one, and it may go away. Nevertheless I do use two virtual desktops when I’m doing research and I want to keep a reference handy, so I think it’s nice to have to have something that can give me a quick visual overview of which desktop I am on.

“But you don’t have any launchers or menus…how do you, you know, open stuff?” I’ve got a couple tricks up my sleeve. First, the excellent Kupfer. It’s a fast and lightweight keyboard-based launcher that works great for opening files and programs, if you know what you’re looking for.

Kupfer

Another great tool that stays out of the way until you need it is XFCE’s right-click menu on the desktop. It gives you full access to the applications menu and settings, so if you don’t feel like using the keyboard or want to drill down by category, you’re totally set up.

Right-click menu in XFCE

I threw on a solid theme, and was pretty much ready to roll. Overall, my system feels quicker, operates a bit more intuitively (since it is truly customized to my preferences), and has (thus far) done a great job of staying out of way so I can get stuff done. Time will tell…I wonder if I’ll still be rocking XFCE at the end of 2012?

The Kindle Fire: A Simple Media Tablet

admin — Mon, 21 Nov 2011 22:32:00 +0000

The much hyped, very mysterious, ultra inexpensive Kindle Fire has arrived. I’ve had mine for a little over 48 hours.

I’ve been waiting awhile for something like this. A dead-simple-yet-capable, ultra portable, affordable computer that gives me full access to the web, multimedia, and various documents¹. In many ways, the modern tablet is the new netbook, but unlike the netbook, it debuted at a fairly high price point. Lower priced tablets have been thus far extremely lackluster in both capability and access to established media outlets. The Fire addresses these challenges head-on with decent physical specs, a full-fledged (if slightly limited) app store, and tight integration with all content that Amazon, Netflix, Hulu, and others have to offer.

And the Kindle Fire is simple². It does multimedia consumption, and does it well. That is all. No Skype (no mic or camera), no expansion via accessories (no Bluetooth), no crazy customizable interface. No widgets, calendaring, or advanced contact management. Just your books, movies, the web, and some games…along with a beautiful screen, intuitive interface, and a good sense of aesthetics.

I bought my Kindle Fire primarily for interacting with PDF files and Kindle versions of textbooks. If you’ve ever used the Kindle app for Android, then you know what the experience is like on this device. It’s awesome. Adobe’s PDF reader is available free in the app store, so that takes care of basic PDF needs. I paid 99 cents for ezPDF Reader, a great app that gives me some advanced options like reflowable text and bookmarking. It’s everything I need to get my research done, without breaking out the laptop. This alone makes the Fire a worthwhile purchase for me.

Add in a decent Netflix implementation, solid web-browsing, and some of my favorite apps and games…and I’m a pretty happy camper, even if the user interface still needs a bit of work³.

If you need to be using your tablet as a laptop replacement, then the Fire is not for you. If you are primarily reading fiction, then the Fire is not for you (I’m not giving my up my e-Ink reader for that purpose). If you are all about the Skype and the Facetime, you’re thinking of the wrong tablet. If your wants and needs revolve primarily around entertainment, the web, and a more interactive experience with the text (e.g. fast searches, PDFs), you can’t go wrong with the Kindle Fire. With these things in mind, I haven’t been disappointed.

In fact, it’s just what I wanted.

Get it on Amazon.

To be completely honest, most of us have these capabilities in our smartphones—yet what the Kindle Fire does, it generally does much better and more comfortably than a mobile handset. Video (for the the most part—the Netflix app needs some work) is smooth. The hi-res, seven inch screen gives me plenty of real estate for reading without the bulk of a larger surface. The web browser is snappy and can handle just about anything I throw at it, and again, the 7” screen makes a big difference there. ↩
I really shouldn’t have to write this, but the Kindle Fire is not an iPad. It doesn’t try to be an iPad. It’s not meant to be an iPad. It is tablet, like an iPad, but that’s pretty much where the similarities end. The iPad is much more powerful. It has many more capabilities (Bluetooth, cameras, a microphone). It’s significantly larger than the Fire. Quite frankly, the iPad has defied many critics initial opinions (mine included) and has become in many respects a legitimate content creation device and a communications powerhouse. That’s not the Kindle Fire is all about. It’s really, truly, in every way, media consumption machine. Keep that in mind. And remember they’re selling this thing for less than $200. ↩
The UI does need refinement. Sometimes it takes two taps for an action to register, and currently there’s no way to delete certain media items from the main screen of the device…a bummer if you’re sharing and you’d like some privacy. I’m confident Amazon will take care of these things in future sofware updates. ↩

Why I Chose the ESV

admin — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 08:24:00 +0000

This blog post is pretty much inspired by Carson’s post on the NRSV, since he got me thinking about Bible translations, and why I’ve chosen the ESV. Although we have different preferences for our primary translation, I really appreciate the reasons he chooses the NRSV over the ESV, and in fact he’s the one that convinced me to buy an NRSV. It was my primary Bible for about six months, and I really enjoyed reading from it even though it didn’t “stick” for me. Without even really meaning to, I think I’ve kind of settled on the English Standard Verson for a while, and here’s why:

1) It’s familiar. I’ve been using the ESV since before it was cool. In 2002, it was one of the only freely available modern translations on the Internet—which made it my default in software like e-Sword or Xiphos. Second, the ESV retains traditional phrasing that just sounds right to me like “…the valley of the shadow of death” in Psalm 23, and “deliver us from evil” in Matthew 6, for example. Most of Scripture I’ve memorized at this point (and that’s not nearly enough) is in KJV (just from hearing it a million times) or the ESV (which, conveniently, retains much of the same rhythm and structure of the KJV).

2) Crossway is a not-for-profit publisher with a mission. This means that the license for using the ESV is extremely permissive. Like I noted above, it was one of the first modern translantions to be freely available on the internet, and Crossway still makes the digital version available free in a number of formats for smartphones, etc. I dig the open, missionary spirit, which seems quite contrary to how many other publishers approach their translations. Access is the ESV is ubiquitous and easy.

3) The ESV Study Bible is awesome. Yeah, yeah, I know it has a bit of a Reformed bias and doesn’t really give women’s ordination or Christian Pacifism a fair shake (heck, I’ve complained about those things publically) but it does a great job of representing the classical/traditional Christian view of many issues and argues lucidly for them. Although I disagree on some points in the study articles, the vast majority of the content in the ESV Study Bible is high quality and academically very sound as far as I can tell. The exegetical notes are especially helpful when considering the historical, cultural, and theological context for a passage. Now, a great study bible doesn’t a great translation make, however it’s just one more thing that keeps bringin’ me back.

4) There’s plenty(!) of editions to choose from. You’ve got evangelistic paperbacks, nice compacts, a beautiful online edition, and fantastic premium bindings as well. Pretty much every book Crossway puts out is solid quality—in general a step above comparable Bibles from Tyndale and Zondervan. The ESV is also going to be coming soon in a Cambridge Clarion format, which is pretty much a dream come true for me. Not very many other translations are there yet.

5) It really is understandable and reliable. I know the ESV has its issues. There are some pretty opaque renderings, to be sure…but certainly no more than in any other major translation. And after 10 years on the market, the ESV still has a great reputation overall for both accuracy and readibility. I feel that I can trust it almost as much as the NASB in terms of its fidelity to the original languages, yet I can also be decently confident that it will sound okay (like the NKJV) when I read it aloud at home or in church.

6) The ESV is standard in circles I run with. This one is pretty big for me, actually. My Anglican church preaches and teaches from the ESV. The friends I interact with on a daily basis mostly use the ESV as well. It’s nice to immediately be working with the same translation, whether that be at church or at work, or hanging out online. When I’m talking over a passage, I don’t have to bring up a different version on my phone or computer, although it’s nice to be able to do that pretty easily when I need to!

7) There’s a growing eccumenical spirit surounding the ESV. The translation certainly didn’t start out as an eccumenical effort, and it clearly is still associated strongly with the Neo-Reformed internet rockstars. Yet, the Lutheran Church—Missouri Synod has officially adopted the ESV, and I’m seeing many Evangelical Anglicans embracing it as well. The fact is that thanks to the excellent marketing efforts by Crossway, the ESV is pervasive—I think that it can’t help but move beyond Piper, Discoll, and Co.

I realized a long time ago that there’s no perfect translation. They’re mostly all pretty good, and each has strengths and weaknesses. It’s really easy for a guy like me to sink way to much time into finding “the one” translation, and reading up on the nuances of the TNIV vs. the NLT vs. the NET vs. whatever the hot new translation is. The fact is, I now have on my hands a translation that is reliable, sounds decent, and has endured at least a decade. Plus it’s what my church uses and I’m now very familiar with it. Throw in my dream Bible, and it’s starting to make sense why I’m gravitating that direction.

Star Trek and Bible Versions

admin — Thu, 20 Oct 2011 21:06:56 +0000

This is about to get nerdy. Really nerdy.

If Star Trek: The Original Series is the King James Version of Bible…

…Star Trek: The Next Generation is the NRSV

…Star Trek: Deep Space Nine is the ESV

…Star Trek: Voyager is the NIV

…Star Trek: Enterprise is the CEB

…Star Trek: The Animated Series is The Message

Notes from India

admin — Wed, 21 Sep 2011 23:13:00 +0000

It’s super late for me (10:17 pm on a weeknight!) and I should really be getting to bed, but it’s been over a week since we got back from India, and I want to make sure I write down some of my thoughts from that wonderful, exhausting, whirlwind of a trip.

First of all, everyone thought we were crazy for taking a toddler on a trip that had about 34 hours of transit time. Well, I have something to say to you guys: you were right . It does take a little bit of insanity to take on a challenge like that, but I had two things going for me: 1) I am a little insane, and 2) my wife is even more insane. Between the two of us, we had enough crazy to cover it just fine. Amber did a fantastic job, and I can honestly say that while it wasn’t miserable like many predicted, it certainly was challenging and tiring.

India itself is beautiful, messy, disturbing, dirty, rich, scary country that reminds me a lot of my African home, yet it’s also completely different. The people are wonderful, the food is spicy, the clothing is colorful. The collision between the old and new is evident in explosions of culture that sometimes result in very real casualties.

I was shocked to hear of women committing suicide as result of arranged marriages by their parents. The new generation looks to the West and wants to marry for love—perhaps even across social class boundaries—and who can blame them? Yet this isn’t how it’s been done. It’s still not how it’s done for many, many people…and this idea brings so much conflict to families that some women decide it’s just better to leave their life all together. Weddings in this developing country are also becoming more and more expensive due to influences from the west, and traditionally the bride’s family pays for the celebration. Because of the massive financial burden that this could bring, and the shame that would result in not being able to pay for the wedding, people are now killing their female babies! These are just some of life-and-death struggles this country is engaged in as it seeks to simultaneously join the global village and retain is unique cultural character and way of life.

There are anti-conversion laws there, so you’re not allowed to openly attempt to convince someone of the truth-claims of your religion. It’s difficult to be a missional Christian in India. I have been reminded once again that we enjoy liberties and comforts here in the United States are truly are rare worldwide. Yet, I live a shallow, ungrateful life—rarely exercising my freedom to share what Christ has done for me. I was reminded that the rest of the world has time for tea and spends time with family. I’d often rather work an extra hour than build a Lego tower with my one and half year old or relax for thirty minutes over coffee with my wife. I’d rather blog than take ten minutes to thank God for plenty to eat, relative security, and total access to Scripture and so many helpful resources to understand it.

I had forgotten what it means to see beggars on the corner. Elderly women, with no place to sleep except cement covered in cow crap. Chances are none of them have heard the Gospel. And it’s not just adults on the street, but children playing in filth, eating who knows what and with no clean water. I walked by a child in this condition, with a Diet Coke in my pack and homemade brownies in my stomach. I gave them a dollar. Didn’t even think to give them the bottle of water in my pocket or prayer from my heart. Sure didn’t mention the name of Jesus. The memory makes me want to weep. What kind of person am I? Not the kind that deserves what I have, that’s for sure.

My family is wonderful. It was absolutely worth the whole trip to see little Jensen enjoy his Ama, Apa, and Uncle (who he called Adoo), and to see them enjoy his antics, smiles, hugs.

God was good to us by providing the opportunity to make this journey. He surely spoke to me about being grateful, about loving my family, loving him, and loving everybody else.

I hope I take it to heart.

Packing for Six Days in India

admin — Thu, 01 Sep 2011 22:43:14 +0000

Six day trip to India. Passports, cold meds, phone, headphones, glasses, Kiva pack, electronics, camera, ereader, rosary, wallet, circa notebook, shirt pocket briefcase, clothes for 3 days, flip flops, airline-approved toiletry bag, electric razor, ball cap, flashlight, toys for the toddler.

Packed.

Intentionally Pursuing Discipleship Through Mentoring Relationships

admin — Mon, 22 Aug 2011 20:12:16 +0000

Seeking wisdom from other members of the Body seems to be no easy affair in today’s church culture, regardless of denominational affiliation. Obviously, we can seek wisdom by asking questions of those we respect when in need, but I’d like to think that as Christians we can do better than this kind of consumeristic, reactionary grab for discernment. I want to aquire real wisdom, which I believe must take time and consistent effort. Mentoring relationship are avenues for developing relationships and connections, imparting tradition and knowledge, and supporting one another in trial of all kinds. A few things that come to mind as I ponder my own difficulty in finding these kind of relationships:

1) I’ve had a lot more success when I approach this issue with humility, making a decision to understand that people like my priest, grandparents, and deacons not only know the Bible better than I do in some regards, but they’ve also generally had a lot more time to apply these principles and truths. As much I might like to think my angst is unique, chances are they might know something about whatever it is I’m going through.

2) We’ve got to carve out time to make this stuff happen. There are a few guys at my church that have been such sources of encouragement to me and have been great sources of wisdom as I’ve taken this difficult route of taking my family to a new denomination. Although we are not in a formal mentoring relationship, I’ve never regretting sacrificing a few chores around the house or my Facebook time to spend time with them in formal and informal settings. Taking the time on my lunch break at work to meet somebody for a bite, etc, can be difficult, but worth it in the long run for developing relationships and by God’s grace obtaining some wisdom in the process.

3) Mentoring relationships don’t usually happen by accident. I would say I have had a small number that have happened organically (my relationship with my own father, and one particularly influential high school teacher) however I think in general we have to pursue these things with a high degree of intentionality.

4) All of this is easier said than done I know I don’t like to ask help, my schedule is pretty much packed out, and I feel a little weird going up somebody I don’t know too well (and as a new Phoenician, I don’t know anybody that well) and saying, “Hey, wanna be my mentor?”

Have you ever been intentionally discipled in Christ? If so, how did you make that happen? If not, what’s gotten in the way, and how can help each other get out of this state of formational impoverishment?

Practice Meditative Bible Study with Lectio Divina

admin — Sun, 14 Aug 2011 22:19:59 +0000

Lectio Divina, or “Divine Reading,” is one way of integrating contemplative methods with devotional Bible study that I have found particularly helpful along my journey with Jesus.

The ancient practice of Lectio Divina most likely originated with with monks of the Benedictine tradition, although it is now an integral part of how many faith-communities and individuals worship through prayer and bible study. The driving idea behind Lectio Divina is that Bible study is and should be an expression of your relationship with the Triune God. It is a method that emphasizes a certain conversational aspect of meditating on the Scriptures by providing specific times during your Bible study to both hear from God and respond to His word. There are are four stages to the Lectio Divina process: Reading, Meditation, Response, and Contemplation.

Before you begin, it is advised that you take a moment to pray and ask for the direction of the Holy Spirit as you move through various stages of Lectio Divina. As with any method for Bible study and prayer, it will probably be beneficial to also find a place that is quiet and free of distractions.

Reading. In this first stage of prayer, you choose a passage of Scripture to read slowly and carefully. Don’t read too much, as you want to really be able to focus on just a few aspects of the text that might resonate in your mind. On the other hand, it’s important to not just take one verse out of context, either. I generally try to go methodically through a book of the Bible, using either the pre-marked sections or chapter markers as my guide for each session. I’ve also found it to be helpful to write down verses that stand out or thoughts that come to mind while reading. If you keep these notes, they can become a valuable record of your spiritual journey over time.

Meditation. After carefully reading through your scripture passage, take some time to really ponder what was said. Go back over your notes, and perhaps add any clarifying thoughts you might have. Think about what this passage meant to the writer, to the original audience, and what it might mean for you. You might also re-read the passage in order to glean further meaning and gain greater understanding.

Response. During this portion of the prayer, allow yourself to respond to the text. Think about how the text might change you. Does the text alter how you view the world, yourself, or God? What attitudes in yourself does the passage bring to light? Offer your response to the Father in humble submission to His will.

Contemplation. Simply focus lovingly on God. Words are not necessary in this part of the prayer, because you are resting in His presence. Don’t resist thoughts as they come to your mind…simply deal with them. If they are relevant to your conversation with God, then offer them back to Him and pray for guidance. If they are not, dismiss them, and return your full attention to the One who gives you peace, rest, and understanding.

As with all disciplines, Lectio Divina takes practice and time, however I believe that it can be a powerful way to integrate a meditative and contemplative practice with your existing devotional practice.

Belief & doubt & and a new song

admin — Mon, 25 Apr 2011 13:59:00 +0000

Belief is a funny thing. At least in the biblical sense, it’s more than mere intellectual assent, but rather a trust, confidence, acceptance of something. Sometimes I feel like I have a lot of trouble believing—doubt has been an pretty consistent companion for me on my faith journey over the years, popping up at the worst possible times. Often I can’t believe I’d even ever consider not believing.

I’ve witnessed an interesting phenomenon regarding my belief—sometimes I can believe, but also not-believe, at the same time. Even when I have intellectual doubts, there seems to be some sort of core inside of me that clings to Truth with an unexpected intensity, a surprising confidence. The sad thing is that sometimes, I even doubt that inner stronghold. Why is that even there? I ask myself. It could be that I’ve been a Christian so long that it’s just permanent ingrained on my psyche. Or—and I’m no theologian, but this seems likely to me—it could be the inner witness of the Holy Spirit, pointing to Jesus, reminding me of his faithfulness and trustworthiness.

I wonder if this the kind of doubt and counter-witness that the Psalmist was sensing when he wrote Psalm 13. I mean, he’s asking if God has actually forgotten him! I often relate to the desparate trust of the man had who asked Jesus for a miracle for his son. “Help my unbelief!” Jesus was his last, best, only hope for wholeness.

I paraphrased these passages and put them to some standard folk chords—here is the result. If you don’t care to listen, here are the lyrics:

How long O Lord, O Lord have you
forgotten me down here?

How long O Lord, O Lord will you
hide from me forever?

How long O Lord, how long will I
seek rest for my soul?

How long O Lord, how long will I
be immersed in the sorrows of this world?

Consider me…

Answer me, please.

I believe in your steadfast love
I believe, help my unbelief.

I believe there is joy in your salvation
I believe, help my unbelief.

Help me O Lord to sing to you
For you have been faithful to me

Love I Do Not Understand

admin — Fri, 22 Apr 2011 23:08:43 +0000

Today is Good Friday, the day our Lord was crucified for us.

Last night, my local church (Desert Mission Anglican Church in Phoenix, Arizona) had a Maundy Thursday service that included Holy Communion and Tenebrae. We gathered in a basement lit only by a few Christmas lights and candles. In the darkness, we read the Scriptural account of the events leading to the crucifixion. In traditional Tenebrae fashion, one of eight candles was extinguished after each reading, slowly engulfing us all in that deep kind of darkness only found in church basements.

Holy Communion was especially meaningful, of course, and the songs our worship leader chose could’t have fit the occasion better. What a privilege to be able to join in and play guitar for a service like this. The part that really got to me was the Stripping of the Altar.

After all the candles except for the center Christ-candle had been snuffed out, the worship team and clergy gathered around the altar (communion table, for you non-sacramental folks , and stripped it of all decorative items. The candlesticks were taken away and the table cloth was pulled off in one motion by our pastor. The simple, plain wooden table stood completely bare, with only the single, small flame of the Christ-candle left. It alone kept the blackness from swallowing the room.

By the light of the Christ-candle, a deacon read Psalm 22.

…I am poured out like water,

and all my bones are out of joint;

my heart is like wax;

it is melted within my breast;

my strength is dried up like a potsherd,

and my tongue sticks to my jaws;

you lay me in the dust of death.

For dogs encompass me;

a company of evildoers encircles me;

they have pierced my hands and feet—

I can count all my bones—

they stare and gloat over me;

they divide my garments among them,

and for my clothing they cast lots….

We exited the building in silence, contemplating what we had just participated in, what we had just witnessed. In Holy Communion, we received the true body and blood of of our Savior and the forgiveness of sins, and immediately afterward, we were thrust into the narrative of what happened so that we could come to that table. The God of the Universe became a man, lived among us, healed us, loved us, cared for us. He fed us and gave us words of life. We turned on him, stripped him of his clothes, beat him while was naked, spit in his face, nailed him to a tree, and left him on splinters to die.

We punctured his side and ripped his skin; he now offers us his body and blood freely as a gift. All the world’s life was created through him; we repayed him with torture and a slow death. Yet, he ransoms us from the powers of darkness, forgives us, and injects us with new life.

I do not understand that kind of love.

___
Photo by Kamoteus (A Better Way)

So I’m a vegetarian…

admin — Thu, 03 Mar 2011 20:33:00 +0000

One day I was thinking about the food that I eat and I realized that meat had ceased to be a once-living thing to me. I had totally forced the concept of “animal” out of the idea of “meat” so that it was just another food substance. This disturbed me because I was reading about how the ancient Jews viewed animal food, and how it was strongly emphasized to them through ritual that a very real life was sacrificed for them. The total draining of the blood, the strict requirement on what kind of meat to eat, meant that animal flesh was something valuable, a meaningful symbol, even a symbolic spiritual pointer. This carries over even into Christian life in the New Testament. I realized that when I ate meat, I had no appreciation of a life lost. It meant nothing to me. I was taking a costly gift for granted.

I did not and do not consider eating meat a sin. Clearly, God allows and even sanctions eating meat throughout the Old Testament, beginning with Noah¹. In the New Testament, Jesus ate fish and participated in the Passover meal, so he ate meat. I think when we try to outdo Jesus on the holiness front we typically get ourselves into lots of trouble. No one is weird for eating meat. Pretty sure God is cool with it.

No, eating meat itself is not a sin. The way I was eating meat however, was.

At first, my vegetarianism was a kind a fast to remind myself to not take any life (even that of an animal) for granted. Later, I discovered some pretty disturbing things about how mass-market meat is produced, and quite frankly it just stopped being appealing. I realized that what many of us eat is prone to disease, full of chemicals and “filler,” and is produced by treating people and animals with little respect and decency. After reading up on the meat industry and watching some documentaries (yup, Food, Inc. was one of them) I found that I rarely craved ground beef or any poultry or pork—although sometimes an organic steak still sounds good to me.

So far the benefits of remaining a vegetarian have been:

Opportunities to discuss animal cruelty, the human rights involved in the meat industry, and the health risks of the current mass-meat production system with many people who are genuinely curious.
The willingness to try many new foods—a totally new diet means totally new dishes. There are some absolutely AWESOME vegetarian foods out there and my wife has become quite the vegetarian chef herself.
A connection with the global community and my roots in African culture. In Africa (and most of the rest of the world) meat is considered a delicacy and a special treat. It may be part of your meal, but it is never the bulk of it. From what I can tell, this is both healthier in general and seems more consistent with the general attitude of respect toward meat I am trying to cultivate.
I generally eat healthier. It’s rare for a day to go by that I don’t get my full servings of fruit and vegetables. I get protein from nuts, beans, cheese, and eggs.

Which leads me to the fact that I am not vegan. I still do dairy and eggs. Also, to be totally honest—and this might come as shock, so prepare yourself—I’m actually not really, truly a vegetarian. I eat fish often (about once every week or two weeks) so technically I’m a pescatarian. Moreover, I’m really not that strict about meat either. I strive for my vegetarianism/pescatarianism to be a general lifestyle and attitude, not some strict form of self denial. So if I come over to your house and you make me a meat dish, I will still eat it out of respect for the time, effort, and care you put into preparing it for me. I ate turkey this last Thanksgiving, and I sure had some ham on Christmas day too.

The point is that it is about being aware of what I eat and drink, and making healthy, God-honoring, life-valuing, socially-conscious choices regarding the fuel I put in my body.

Photo: Some rights reserved by SweetOnVeg

Every moving thing that lives shall be food for you. And as I gave you the green plants, I give you everything. But you shall not eat flesh with its life, that is, its blood. (Genesis 9:3-4 ESV) ↩

Tension is a passing note

admin — Thu, 24 Feb 2011 21:51:58 +0000

I have what seems to be an unquenchable thirst for peace through knowledge. What I mean by this is that I like to have things figured out. Who wouldn’t, right? I spend lots of time thinking and studying and seeking after solutions to problems. There’s nothing wrong with this in and of itself, except that like I said, sometimes I’m seeking to find peace through knowledge alone, and ultimately that can never really happen, especially in matters of faith.

When you really figure out Eucharistic theology, what you find is that no theology accurately describes what happens in the sacrament, and you sure can’t articulate it either. You read everything on the internet about predestination, and you find that a fully biblical doctrine election somehow incorporates free-will. You try to find a body of believers to identify with, and you find none of them exemplify their oh-so-elegant confessional statements. You start looking at yourself and your heart drops because the depth of your sin is overwhelming, but somehow the light of grace keeps you from sinking all the way down. You come to grips with the fact you are a sinner and saint and that somehow life is both sacred and so, so profane that your heart aches. Violence seems like the culmination of the corruption of the universe, but then it is the only way we can think of to end the steady march of evil toward our loved ones. For every piece of knowledge you gain, something you don’t know is revealed. Paradox is par for the course in authentic Christianity.

Where is the peace? I think it’s in the difficult, simple act of trusting Jesus. In the midst of rushing rivers of tension that threaten to sweep us away each day, there’s a spot of calm in the storm, and it’s the empty tomb of a resurrected Lord that we can rely on to be our prophet, priest, and king.

I’m not saying that we trust with no basis in knowledge. Part of the reason we trust is that we really can know that Jesus is lord. But trust extends beyond knowledge, past the tensions of life and sin and doctrine and feeble attempts to reconcile them all, and into an anchor of covenant relationship.

Maybe all the tension exists so we don’t have anywhere else to look but to our Lord.

Tension is to be loved when it is a like a passing note, to a beautiful, beautiful chord.

“Tension is a Passing Note” by Sixpence None The Richer