Naturally Nena

20 Chore Tuesday

2012-07-31T08:58:00.000-06:00

So, I sort of dropped off the face of the planet.

Again.

Just a note to self, it's a bad idea to start a 30 days challenge when you are going to be gone for half of those 30 days. Just saying.

Regardless, today I am linking up with Emily at Joyful Abode's 20 Chore Tuesday. This may or may not actually happen every week, but for now, I am going to go with it. I love the idea of lists. I also find I get a lot more accomplished when I use a list. Especially when I write down specific tasks. Not just "clean kitchen"... what actually needs to get done in the kitchen so that I am happy with it? Do I need to clean out the fridge? Do I need to wipe down the fronts of the cupboard doors? What exactly do I want to accomplish today?

This is my list for today. I normally use the Cozi app on my phone (available in online format, too) to write down my list, but today I am going to stay away from my phone as much as possible so I can actually get stuff done and not get sucked into the world of Instagram all day. So I just have a paper copy that I will type out here.

General:
-reorganize Pinterest boards (I have been meaning to do this for ages, and it will only take like, a half hour)
- make meal plan for week
- get groceries (as quickly as possible so I don't get distracted)

Dining Room:
- clear all junk off dining room table
- sweep floors
- mop floors
- clear off extra chairs and put them away (I have a couple extra chairs sitting in the dining room that somehow accumulated piles of junk)

Bathroom:
- clean toilet
- clean sink
- clean mirror
- clean tub
- sweep and mop floor

Laundry:
- fold/put away clothes sitting on top of dryer (I was totally lazy the last couple days and havent folded stuff as it comes out)
- throw current wash load in dryer
- sort clothes in upstairs laundry basket
- complete 1 entire load from wash to put away (for whatever reason this is a challenge for me)

Living Room:
- sort toys into keep & garage sale piles
- move couches (I am not happy with the current set up of my living room)
- vacuum area rug
- clean cat hair off green couch (my white cat is getting old, and it is hot... there is cat hair everywhere!)

And most importantly.... spend time playing with the kids!

Alright, that is it. Hopefully I can get this done so that tomorrow I can move on to another 20 things! woohoo!

Nena

Sleep

2012-06-07T11:24:00.002-06:00

Today is Day 4, and Sarah Mae is talking about Sleep.

How I love sleep. Today, in fact, after coming home from my paper route, I took the opportunity to slip back between the sheets and fall asleep again. Thinking that if I had just a few more minutes of rest, it would make up for my restless night last night.
Boy was I wrong! I woke up about an hour later when the phone rang, and felt like I had been hit by a truck.

I hate it when that happens. There were so many things I could have gotten done during that hour of alone time (the phone, conveniently, woke up my children as well - who desperately needed a bit of extra sleep) but instead I chose to waste it, leaving myself feeling even more tired and frustrated.

I don't want anyone to think I am anti-napping. Trust me, I have taken many a good nap during those quiet afternoon hours when my children are sleeping. The problem is when I start using sleep as an opportunity to escape my responsibilities. Trying to find a balance of getting enough sleep at night so that I am not tired or grumpy, but not so much that I am groggy from over-sleep the next morning is something I struggle with. I honestly could sleep for two days straight and wake up and think "if I could only get 5 more minutes!"

Does anyone else feel this way? What do you find helps you get out of bed in the morning before your kids wake up? Anytime I get into the habit of staying awake and diligently prepare for our day, I find such a big difference. But it's all too easy to slip back into the bad habit of "trying to get 5 more minutes" of sleep.

Today's challenges:

Mary Challenge: Get your Bible out and look up as many references to the word “lazy” as you can find. Write down some key consequences of choosing a lifestyle of laziness. If you have time, also look up references to being diligent and write down the blessings of choosing a lifestyle of diligence.

Martha Challenge: Keep working on your bedroom! If you haven’t yet, clean out underneath your bed. If you’ve done that, move on to your night stand.

I can't tell you how grateful I am that we are still working on the bedroom. Yesterday got so busy, and I became very distracted, and completely forgot about a meeting I had in the evening. Which I hadn't planned for, and was planning on working on my room during that time. Oops. Needless to say, not a lot was done.

So, here's to being more intentional, today! When I can make a point of getting my work done first, I will have more time to enjoy with my kids working on that list of things I want to do that I made yesterday. And I can do those things without the nagging feelings of guilt that say "hey, there are dishes in the sink."

Cheers to you all!

Nena

** I would just like to add a little disclaimer for any of my LDS readers. Sarah Mae is not a member of the LDS church, and so occasionally in her writing I will find small doctrinal differences between what the LDS church teaches and the beliefs she shares on her blog.
I am of the mindset that we can gain knowledge and light from people of many faiths, and not just our own. So I am able to move past those differences, and get to the heart of her writing; her love for the Lord, and her desire to help those of us who may be struggling in the same areas she is. She encourages me to become a better, more motivated person, wife and mother. And that is more important to me than which church she belongs to. This latter part may be helpful to keep in mind for my non-religious readers as well. Thank you.

Priorities

2012-06-06T08:59:00.001-06:00

So, I skipped yesterday's post. Sorry everyone. Yesterday was another focus on distraction. And I chose to spend my down time in the morning as well as the kids' nap time focusing on the Mary challenge we were given, rather than blogging, because I knew that with everything else I had to get finished yesterday, with two extra kiddos on board, and a youth group activity to finish putting together, I wouldn't find time to do it otherwise. And my time with the Lord won out over blogging.

Today, Sarah Mae, who seems like somebody I would totally get along with in real life, is riding the same brain wave as I am. Today's Challenges:

Mary Challenge: Write out your priority list, or find one that you have and then write at the top, “All of life is worship to God” and put all your priorities on one line underneath. Put this somewhere that you can see as a reminder that when you seek first the kingdom, everything else will be added.
Great. This is something I have been wanting to sit down and do for a while now. Yesterday I wrote out a list of all the things I want to do with my kids over the summer (before October). Some of these things are festivals, or cultural celebrations that only happen this time of year. Some of them are easy things like having a picnic in the park, or sleeping in a tent (even if it's just in our living room). But I find that writing things down makes them more like a goal. And it makes it so much easier to achieve something when you can visualize it. And for me, that means writing it down!
I have so many "good" things running through my head all the time. I need to make it a priority to write down the "best" things. So that I can be the best Mom I can.

Martha Challenge: Today is a catch up day. If you have more to do on your closet or in your dresser drawers, take today to do that. For those of you who don’t need more time, your challenge is begin cleaning out underneath your bed.

Fabulous. Thank you Sarah Mae! You must have taken a peak at my schedule for the day. Between a Kindermusik class, errands, and a promised trip to the swimming pool, my day is jam packed! But knowing that I can just work on finishing up in my bedroom (still working on my "closet" from Monday's challenge) makes this whole thing seem possible!

On top of it all, today is a very special day for my lovely Mom. And I want her to know that I love her and am thinking of her today.

So I am off and running for a full day of fun, and am looking forward to getting some work done too! I hope today is the day I tame the wild beast that lives in my closet.

Nena

Distractions

2012-06-04T09:30:00.001-06:00

Okay, Sarah Mae, stop it! Seriously, do you live across the street from me or what?

I am just glad to know that I am not the only one who struggles with distraction.

In fact, just a few weeks ago I posted on my facebook wall that I had been sucked into the tv show "Heroes" on Netflix. Such a time waster! DH and I would watch 2 or sometimes 3 episodes after my kids went to sleep. Considering I wake up at 5:30 to do my paper route, that made for one seriously tired mama! I made it through the entire first season in less than two weeks, and I have thankfully realized how ridiculous I was getting, and slowed down. We only watch one episode every few days. Seriously. Self control isn't exactly my strong suit. And I am still catching naps once or twice a week with my kids to make up for my serious lack of sleep.

So reading today's challenges really hit home for me.

Today's Mary Challenge: "Meditate on Psalm 39:4-5. What is your biggest time waster? What can you do to get rid of the distraction or lessen it? How many days do you have left, if you live until you’re 75? How do you want to use those days?"

I fully plan on spending my quiet time this afternoon writing down answers to these questions. I find I need something tangible to remind me. It's not enough that I know the answer in my head. I need to look and see where I have come from. So I am looking forward to sitting down with my scriptures and my journal and writing about this.

Today's Martha Challenge: "We’re starting with our bedrooms! Today, clean out your bedroom closet. Get rid of the clothes you don’t wear (be honest, are you really going to ever wear that shirt?) If this is a big job, split into two or three days."

That is timely! Just yesterday morning as I was getting ready for church, and sifting through the mountain of clean laundry at the bottom of my closet, I decided I was fed up and announced "I am doing something about this THIS WEEK!" I took a photo of the mess, and am deliberating whether or not I will post before and after photos. It's pretty bad, and I am a little embarrassed to admit I let it get to this point.

Regardless, here is my plan of action:
1. Make bed
2. Sort clothes into piles depending on whose owner it is. (DH, me, Jude, Sadie, and clothes that need to find their way out of my house and to a new owner)
3. Fold said clothes.
4. Put away said clothes.
5. Sweep/Mop bedroom
6. Celebrate!

Doesn't sound like much, but I bet it will take me the better part of the day! So I better hop to it!

Until tomorrow,
Nena

Dipping My Toes

2012-06-01T08:33:00.002-06:00

One of my favorite bloggers, Sarah Mae, released an e-book a while back called "31 Days to Clean." I promptly downloaded this lovely tool and used it in my home and it made such a difference.

Now, Sarah Mae is rebooting the book so that it can be published as a real physical book that you can hold... read... smell... feel... love!

So in preparation for that, she has put together a challenge that will start on Monday, June 4th that I am going to join in on! Because heaven knows I need some encouragement right now in the organization department.

Does that mean that I am revamping this into some sort of cleaning blog? Well, no... but as my life has slowed down a bit I am finally feeling like I am ready to step back into the world of blogging. And when Sarah Mae announced this challenge on Tuesday, I knew this would be an excellent opportunity for me to just dip my toes in and test the waters. And I am hoping that throughout the month, not only will I see my home become less cluttered and more calm, but also that I will worry less about things of little substance. Become less of a Martha, and transform my heart into a Mary heart. And as I do so, I am looking forward to finding some clarity when it comes to what I want and need out of my blog.

I sometimes struggle with this image of perfection. I feel like I have to write this earth shattering, life changing, "pivotal moment" type blog post every single time I sit down to write. I need to learn that sometimes it's okay to just write because I love to write. And sometimes the "fluff" is just as helpful to people. It helps create a sense of normalcy. Sometimes it's all or nothing with me. And today, I want to just be.

Be Grateful.
Be Smart.
Be Clean.
Be True.
Be Humble.
Be Prayerful.

So I will meet you here bright and early Monday morning.

Until then,
Nena

2012-02-19T01:43:00.003-06:00

Hi everyone.
I am sure it's obvious at this point considering how long it has been since I updated, but I am taking a bit of a blogging break.
Lately I have felt as though there is so much going on in my life, and I just have SO much of me out there on the web, and I just want to step back and take a break from it all. I also feel like I need to reevaluate some of my priorities and take some time to just focus on my family.
I may return. I may not. I may take some time to explore different interests blog-wise, but when the time comes that I have decided, I will let you know.
Thanks to all my loyal readers for everything they have given me. It has been an interesting journey, I have come so far. And I appreciate the wonderful online Natural Parenting community that has embraced me and helped me along the way.
All my love,
Nena

Return of the Jedi

2011-10-27T23:52:00.007-06:00

So I apparently felt the need to drop off the planet. I apologize to my regular readers. As you all know, I am still suffering from some depression, and the last few months have been a serious low point for me. It has affected me quite a bit, and I haven't even been able to find the desire to post on here.

But, I am going to push through it and just post anyway. So please bear with me if my posts are disjointed and odd the next month or so. Usually things get better for me as Christmas gets closer.
I thought I would do a quick photo review of what we have been up to the last couple months!


Got to see "Wicked" on my birthday!


DH and I have been married for 4 crazy years!!!

We had lots of fun at the Regina Folk Fest

I fell in love with Twiggy-style mod eyeliner

Sidewalk paint!

Fun at the Beach

I got to see Hanson!!!

Imagine me screaming like a 14 year old girl!

Lost the baby weight!

Sadie got even cuter!

Jude started his third (!) year of Kindermusik!

My brother bought a house with closet doors that are Sadie approved!

I tried to climb through my basement window and ended up looking like a derby girl!

Lots and lots of Rider games!

Jude got to meet his favorite Rider, Weston Dressler.

I went on a 16 km walk with the Young Women from church. Cool street art I saw en route.

Sadie got an awesome new eggplant hat from Papa and Nana

Autumn = sweater and legging weather! Love it!

Jude has become an expert at memory matching games.

Sadie has decided that she will not sleep without me next to her. *sigh*

I joined the Maximize Your Mornings Challenge*

Jude started a Yoga class (which he LOVES) and does yoga at home every night before bed.


October General Conference came and went with much to be learned!

I also got to attend my first home birth! Awesome!

I will be updating again on a regular basis. Thanks for your patience everyone! I can't wait to start blogging on a regular basis again!

*Maximize your Mornings Challenge over at Inspired to Action

Wordless Wednesday: Pioneer Picnic

2011-07-27T07:00:00.003-06:00

Each year our Stake at church holds a Pioneer Picnic out at a ward family's farm. It is always a blast. We all dress in our "pioneer best" play games, eat delicious food, listen to stories of our ancestors, and sing songs around a campfire. This year's was held this past Saturday. Here are some highlights from the day:

cute little pioneer baby

today seems like a good day to learn to crawl

hey Mom, look what I'm doing!

this is awesome!

Golf is a serious game!

Hooray! A hole in one!
(Not difficult when the ball is only two inches from the
hole to begin with! lol)

lining up a putt!

trying on Daddy's new Blue Jays hat

a tired girl at the end of the night.
(Right before the fireworks woke her up!)

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Homemade Playdough Fun

2011-07-26T13:18:00.003-06:00

Due to popular demand after posting a photo of my little man playing with some homemade playdough on instagram, here is my recipe:

2 Cups Water
2 Cups Flour (I use whole wheat flour because that is all I have in the house, but if you want a smoother texture, I suggest white bread flour)
1 Cup Salt
1 Tbsp Vegetable Oil
1 1/2 Tbsp Cream of Tartar
1 Package of Kool-aid, or similar powdered drink (for color)

Add kool-aid mix to water in a pot, then add the remaining ingredients. Stir over low heat until ingredients form a ball of dough.

I use Kool-aid powder for color because the color doesn't transfer as it does with dyes or food coloring. Our favorites are: lime, blue raspberry, and cherry. They also smell delicious!

This is a fun activity you can whip up in next to no time, and your kids will have hours of fun! If you'd like some awesome ideas on what to do with playdough, please check out Nurture Store, they have a great free E-book that you can download with lots of fun ideas! You will find it in the right-hand column on their main page.

Get out there and play!

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Farewell Dear Friends... Farewell.

2011-07-25T23:17:00.002-06:00

This week marked the end of an era as I said goodbye to my beloved, and fondly nick-named "hobo shoes"

It's a long story as to how I actually acquired these shoes (they originally belonged to my old manager), but they have adorned my feet for many months. Throughout my pregnancy with Sadie I wore these shoes until it was too cold to wear anything but boots. These shoes have accompanied me to many playgrounds, letting in lots of sand along the way. These shoes have walked with me several mornings when delivering newspapers. These shoes have been to Niagara Falls and back. Have been worn with formal attire as well as jeans. These shoes have had a good life. And walked their last steps on Saturday afternoon before their retirement. With three holes in the toes, and two soles that are coming detached, I finally admitted, I could no longer wear them, despite their incredible comfort.

And so, I finally had to admit that I needed to spend money on myself (why do Moms do that? We always feel guilty for buying anything for ourselves, but cater to our childrens' needs without hesitiation!?!?), and DH took me shopping. I knew exactly what I was looking for, and was happy that I found something fairly close to what I was wanting.

Hello, new friends. I look forward to walking many miles with you. May you serve me as well as your predecessors. With the added bonus of me no longer looking homeless.

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Thursday Afternoon Share: Connecting

2011-07-21T12:30:00.017-06:00

I came across this blog last night and instantly fell in love with it. I am sharing one of my favorite posts that I was able to read last night. It really stuck with me and makes me reflect on the moments when I was truly able to connect with my kids. Also, her 3 year old's name is Jude. So she gets bonus points for having awesome taste in names! I hope you enjoy this blog as much as I am!

Real Child Development: Connecting with Your Kids in a Tense Situation

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A wee hiatus

2011-07-20T22:44:00.000-06:00

I am taking a bit of a blogging break throughout the month of July. I am busy juggling several other projects at the moment, but promise I will blog as much as I can throughout it all and will be back at full force asap!
Love you all.
In the meantime, here is an adorable baby:

Oh she just makes my heart melt! I can't believe she is 7 months old already!

Wordless Wednesday: Playing Catch Up

2011-07-13T16:44:00.000-06:00

hi everyone, I am so sorry I have been MIA the last couple of weeks. I even forgot to queue up my guest posts! You all must think that I fell off the planet!

I wanted to do a sort of photo review of what we have been up to the last couple of weeks. And then I will try to get back blogging in the next day or two! I have a great post written up in my head that needs to make it's way through my fingers and the keyboard onto the screen, so hopefully I can work on that a bit!

In the meantime, here is what we have been busy doing the last couple weeks.

Happy Belated Canada Day!

Sadie Explores an Avacado:

Mommy gave me this thing... must attack!

What is this avocado you speak of?


oh wow! It's delicious!

Lots of BBQ Goodness

Jude "re-skewering" his lamb and veggie kabobs

First Rider Game of the Regular Season:

The Grey Cup

Jude loves the "Go Riders"!

Scrunchy faced Sadie with Papa

These are how close our seats are! #WIN!

Jude's ~~first~~ second time bowling:

Apparently if he runs to the middle of the lane it works better.


I wish everyone ran like Jude does.

Toddlers vs Body Image

2011-06-30T08:56:00.003-06:00

Between car problems, and my own resolution to use public transit more often this summer, my kiddos and I found ourselves making the trek to the bus stop yesterday on our way to the swimming pool.
Things were going well. It was a beautiful day, Jude LOVES buses (I can't adequately explain how much he truly loves buses), and a nice couple in their 40s were waiting for the bus as well. They smiled at Jude and talked to him a bit, and everyone was enjoying themselves. Then the gentleman made a motion with his hand suggesting a large baby bump and said to Jude "You have a big stomach. Do you eat too much?"

HOLD UP! EXCUSE ME!?!?!?!?

Fighting the urge to immediately jump this man and fight him to the death, I simply held Jude's hand tighter and began pointing out the passing cars. Choosing not to give this man's asinine comment the satisfaction of a reaction.

But it bugged me.

All day it bugged me.

As we sat by the pool enjoying an ice cream sandwich it bugged me.

Last night as I was putting Jude's food on his dinner plate it bugged me.

All morning it has bugged me.

So what does a Mommy do? Blog about it... of course!

Move over ugly duckling.

Why did it bug me so much you ask? Well...
No one would ever dream of saying that to a 14 year old girl. We certainly wouldn't say that to other adults on the street. So what makes it okay to say to a 2.5 year old, regardless of their sex?
Don't get me wrong. There are toddlers out there who are dangerously overweight, and whose weight will cause them serious health problems in the future. Obesity is a real issue. However, my son is not overweight.

And even if he was, does shaming a child and setting them up for an eating disorder so early in life solve anything? If a child hears enough comments like that when they are small, I can only imagine the impact it has on how they view themselves as they grow older. Many times when talking about anorexic teens, the topic of skewed body-image comes into play. Where do you think that starts? Why don't we focus more on educating parents about healthy food choices, and less about telling kids that they "eat too much."

Here is my issue. How do I, as Jude's Mommy, teach him that comments like these are coming from foolish people who don't know how to think before they speak? Unfortunately, this is not the first time he has heard something along these lines, despite how NOT fat he is. How can I reassure him that in this world where he is bombarded with images of super heroes and body builders and beautifully airbrushed pectorals splashed on billboards, that he is 100% completely normal? And how do I say to insensitive people that at two and a half years old it is healthy for him to still be carrying a fair amount of baby fat.

Both of my children were serious chunks as babies (okay, Sadie still is). Breast milk and cloth diapers do a body good. Now, Jude is a very active little boy, a picky eater at times, and a very sweet little snuggle bug. He is surrounded with an intense amount of love and emotional support from family and many many friends. But is this enough to defeat the evil monster that is poor body image?

In this society where women's bodies are distorted to no end, and men's are done in a far more conspicuous way, how do I ensure that my son grows up with a healthy sense of self esteem?

Thank you to Julian Wotherspoon for taking the photo of Jude and allowing me to use it in this post.

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Wordless Wednesday: Story Time

2011-06-29T08:14:00.000-06:00

Just One Thing Series: "You CAN Make your own Baby Food!

2011-06-28T08:00:00.001-06:00

Today's post was written by Jenilyn at Grits and Giggles and is the second in the "Just One Thing" Guest Post Series.

I will be accepting and running these posts throughout the summer. Please look for a new post every few days.

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I am a first time Mommy to an adorable baby girl who will be 11 months old all too soon. Before she was born, I made the decision to give her the most natural and healthy start she could have. I wanted to breastfeed, try babywearing, cloth diaper, and make my own baby food. Each of these ideas was met with hesitation and resistance from most of my family. They raised us in the generation of formula, Pampers, Gerber, and strollers. Convenience was key when we were babies, because these products were "new and improved" and far more accessible than they had ever been. While there is nothing wrong with these products, and they offer parents safety and convenience, they just weren't for us. Fortunately, my husband was supportive of my decision to parent as naturally as possible.

Breastfeeding was a struggle, but has been the most amazing experience of my life. Babywearing is both fun and a necessity when going out with a little one. Cloth diapering came later for us, but has been wonderful, and I'm glad we switched. The homemade baby food....now that was a challenge!

We decided to wait until our baby girl was 6 months old to start introducing solids. I was ready to get down to business making her yummy and delicious food that I was sure she would enjoy! And...she hated it. We tried pears and apples first, thinking "Every kid likes apples!" Not my kid. She would gag and spit out any pears or apples that came near that little mouth. I became frustrated that she wouldn't eat her food, but knew it was just for fun right now, so we took a break and decided to try again later. She didn't want them later either! My husband decided that maybe it was too strong of a flavor for her, so we went and picked up some jarred foods for her to try. She was reluctant, but she ate them. I was sad, but I knew we could try the homemade food later. We went to the beach a few weeks thereafter, and picked up some store-bought food for her to eat while we were out. After she was done eating one day I needed to clean her spoon to put it in the diaper bag, so I licked it....bad idea!! It was so gross! I thought, "How can she actually like this stuff?"

As soon as we got home, it was back in the kitchen for me, trying to come up with ways to prepare her food so she would like it. I couldn't imagine feeding her that awful tasting stuff again! I picked up sweet potatoes, squash, apples, pears, and other goodies to make her food. She LOVED it! I guess she just needed to get used to eating solids and now she couldn't get enough.

My family said "Isn't it cheaper to buy jarred food off the shelf?" I told them I made 30 servings of squash for $2.50. You can't buy 30 jars of baby food for anywhere close to that! They said "You don't have time to make all of that food." It takes me about an hour to make her 30 servings of a food, and I can do laundry while it's cooking...talk about multitasking! Making her food has truly been a joy since I've started. I haven't found a food yet that she doesn't like to eat, and coming up with new recipes is half of the fun. I share my recipes on my blog in a series I lovingly call "Because Gerber is Gross...." .

Don't be intimidated by the shopping, the cooking, or your baby's angry face when you try to feed them peas for the first time. Making your own baby food is a fun and rewarding experience and is so good for your baby! You know exactly what is going into that little tummy and exactly when it was made. Whether you buy your produce and meats in the organic market, right off the shelf, or out of the freezer, it's still going to be great for your little one. There have been many nights my husband has come into the kitchen and said "Ooooh, that smells good," only to see me throw the fabulous food into the food chopper! Poor guy. Knowing what my baby is eating and that it tastes good not only to her, but to me as well has been, and continues to be a very rewarding experience for us! I hope that you will try your hand at making some fun and healthy foods for your little one!

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Friday Outdoor Fun

2011-06-24T16:16:00.001-06:00

This morning the kids ventured outside to the Amazonian Rain Forest that is our front yard (too. much. rain.) to enjoy the sun while it graced us with it's presence. The mosquitoes chased us in after about an hour, but not before we had a lot of fun!!!

Thursday Afternoon Share: Picking Your Battles

2011-06-23T16:38:00.001-06:00

Just something funny this afternoon to make you laugh. Seriously, this woman is hilarious! I can't even imagine! Who hasn't wanted to do something completely ridiculous like this???

And That's Why you Should Pick your Battles

warning: there is a bit of language in the post.

Wordless Wednesday: Finding Balance

2011-06-22T13:56:00.005-06:00

My number one tip for new Moms? Sleep when the baby sleeps! It will help you stay balanced (and sane)!!!

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Just One Thing Series: "How I Lost my Son and Won Him Back Again"

2011-06-21T14:03:00.060-06:00

Today's post was written by Beth at Far From Camelot and is the first in the "Just One Thing" Guest Post Series.

I will be accepting and running these posts throughout the summer. Please look for more every few days.

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Like most women, I had a birth plan in mind, long before I was even married. I was the product of a cesarean section and although my mother was content not to experience labor and delivery for herself, I was not. Our family religion relies heavily on our spiritual and physical healings from God. A birth in the hospital, hooked up to machines and drugs was not the route I wanted to follow. While still a long way from total acceptance, I was grateful to have midwives and home births available for me.

After a miscarriage, I found myself pregnant again, much quicker than I had really been prepared for. Of course I was scared and anxious that I would lose this child too. But I had been able to pick up where I had left off with my original midwife. Debbie is a strong, Christian woman who had been through a lot of her own personal tragedies. Helping women give birth is her true calling. She is everything you think of about a midwife. Strong in precarious situations yet gentle when she examines the baby’s growth. Knowledgeable of all stages of gestation and attentive to all your concerns and feelings. My pregnancy with her was more than just about birthing a baby. She helped me to make more of a spiritual connection to the baby and the birthing process. Her experience would have been an absolute help to me if it all had gone to plan.

I had planned on a water birth to help cut down on the pain for me and the trauma to the baby. We had the perfect tub and bathroom to add to the ease. Riley (I call him RB in my writings) was born exactly one day before my EDD. Much of that day is a blur. I remember it only in bits and pieces. Labor was spent walking around; continuously moving and in and out of the tub. After 18 hours of labor, I pushed him for 2 hours. He was hung up on my pelvic bone and not getting around it. The decision to go to the hospital was not made lightly. God protected us as RB & I were never in distress, so we had time to pray about the situation.

At the hospital they gave me an epidural and had me rest for an hour. Then it was back to pushing for 30 minutes with the on-call OB-GYN. He made the final decision for a cesarean section. After I was all patched up and lucid, I kept RB in the room with me until we were released. Amazingly he had the same habits out of the womb as in it – up all night, sleep all day! Of course I had to take pain pills while admitted and my mom and grandmother were always with me. I was exhausted but functional.

Compared to the next coming year, giving birth was a walk in the park. My recovery was not that of a regular scheduled section because of the trauma my stomach had taken with the labor. A major battle had taken place inside my uterus. For the time being, it had beaten me. If I moved an inch it felt like my insides were going to come falling out, that’s the best way to describe it. Add the pain of the incision and I thought for sure I was going to rip all the staples out, including tearing up all my organs. The Worst Pain I have ever endured! I couldn’t lie down on my back to sleep. I couldn’t stand up straight and walk without holding on to something. You have no idea how much you use your stomach muscles on a regular basis! And I had to go through this while trying to bond with a new baby. This is when I went through my minor bout with post-partum depression.

I couldn’t lift him in and out of the crib. I could barely hold him at all. Getting out of my bed at night to breastfeed, I thought for sure I would collapse and fall on top of him. Baby-wearing was out of the question and that was something I desperately wanted to do. I had little, if any relationship with him and it destroyed me. RB is a very independent child and part of me can’t help but think it’s because of the lack of physical attention I was able to give him. Not only was I sure I was never going to walk again, but I knew that I hadn’t given RB the best start in life. A baby needs its mother to be whole. For that, I felt so inadequate, so angry and so guilty. My brilliant ideas of birth were harming my child and I couldn’t forgive myself. I fell deeper into depression and it was easy because my husband and mother was there to take care of RB. It helped me to turn away from him too. I didn’t want anything to do with the baby at one point. It was easy to hide that feeling being a stay at home mom. I was alone all day with no one to critique my mothering skills. And then my grandmother died. Put another notch in the “poor me” card. It took almost 4 months for my physical healing from the section. Mentally, I still had a ways to go but my father showed up at our house one day, unannounced. He knows me better than anyone and he could see what was happening to me. I broke down and he helped me through it. Honestly I don’t remember a word he said to me, but I never felt that depression again.

However the damage was done. My son would run to my mother for comfort before me. He and my husband have a wonderful relationship and I felt like a total outsider. Strangers probably looked at me as the step mother because of my lack of physical involvement. I let my husband do all the heavy lifting and running around. I still felt inadequate and I still do today at times. I had the safety net of my family that would catch me when I needed to fall.

After RB turned one year old, we moved out of state for a better job opportunity. No more safety net. RB was stuck alone with me and only me, and I had to buck up. The transition was hard for all of us but it forced me to become the mom I knew I wanted to be. And could be. Only in the past few months has the change in our relationship begun to show. My husband regularly comments on how close RB and I are. He runs to his mommy first and his daddy second.

In some strange way, maybe what we all experienced as a new family helped shaped our son into a compassionate 2 year old today. He shakes hands with people he comes in contact with, never leaving anyone out. He says “hello” to strangers that pass us in the grocery store aisle. He is always looking for ways to help us with our tasks at hand. If he gives a kiss to daddy, he’ll give a kiss to mommy too. And when he’s sitting close to you, he’ll put his hand on your arm and that simple gesture of solidarity makes the past hardships worth the trip.

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Happy Father's Day!

2011-06-19T09:43:00.003-06:00

Hope it's a great one!

Thursday Afternoon Share: Babywearing

2011-06-16T12:30:00.013-06:00

I am currently putting together some information on babywearing and came across this wonderful post that a friend of mine shared. It is definitely worth checking out! Reading it makes me very thankful that I rarely carried Jude FFO, and haven't ever carried Sadie that way. And on top of all this, it is so much more fun to snuggle with a little person!

Why We Don't Recommend a Forward-Facing Carry

If you are looking for more info on babywearing, or would like to attend a babywearing class, please contact Tanya at Precious Earth, she offers amazing classes and can answer all your questions.

Wordless Wednesday: Farmers Market Haul

2011-06-15T15:04:00.000-06:00

A few of the delicious veggies I picked up at today's Farmers' Market. Look at the color in that pepper! Yum!

Summer Guest Post Series

2011-06-11T15:17:00.003-06:00

I am so excited to announce Naturally Nena's Summer Guest Post Series!

With everything my family has going on this summer, along with working on my Doula certification, and just trying to get outside as much as possible, I thought I would put together a little guest posting series.

Interested in getting your post featured on Naturally Nena? We currently average between 1800 & 2200 views a month and are one of the up and coming faces in the world of Natural Parenting.

The theme of the series is "If I Could Tell You Just One Thing" and it is exactly what it sounds like. What would you tell us if you could share just one thing? Just one story?
First, consider your audience. Are you writing to your child? To other Moms? To the readers of Naturally Nena?
Feel free to share funny stories that will make NN readers laugh. Emotional stories will make us reflect on how important our calling as a Mother is. Write a letter to your child sharing a special moment. Be creative! What is one thing you would like to pass on to other Moms?
Guidelines for Submission:

You should currently be a mom or trying to conceive.
Submissions can be published as “Anonymous” or you can use your name and link to your blog.
Think of an event that has happened in your life, either recently or in the past, that you have learned from and has helped you to grow into the person you are today. Consider whether sharing this will help others on their journey through parenthood.
Please spell-check your submission and pay attention to grammer, etc. I won't have a lot of time to edit your submission, so please keep this in mind before submitting it to me.
I would really really love it if you would submit a picture or graphic with your post, but please either own it or have permission to use it.
I will only be accepting original content, so please do not submit something you have posted elsewhere. You do not need to be an AP style parent to submit your article. But please recognize that any hostility toward AP parenting practices, natural child-birthing/child-rearing, etc will NOT be considered. Nor will anything offensive or inappropriate.
I may not be able to post everything that is submitted, and if I am not able to post yours I will let you know so that you can use it on your own blog.
The first post will be put up the week of June 20th. But I will be accepting submissions until much later in the summer.

You will get a lovely little button to post on your blog saying you were a guest writer on Naturally Nena and lots of linky love with your post.

If you are interested, please email me at: pineapplelesson [at] yahoo.com with "Guest Post" somewhere in your subject.

Looking forward to reading what you have to say.

Relay for Life 2011

2011-06-11T13:17:00.002-06:00

Our family took part in the Canadian Cancer Society's Relay for Life last night. Just a few photos of our loooooong night:

Luminary for DH's Grandma

My Grandpa's luminary

Sunrise over Wascana