Need More Rage

Ha Ha! Joke's On You!

2012-05-23T21:14:00.002-05:00

Good goin', Mister Core Hound. If'n you weren't so dumbs, you'd done realize what this here be the silliest debuff fer ta throw at ol' Ratters. Reducifyin' by half of not too fuhggin' much means hardlies nuthin' at all. So there!

Seperated At Birth?

2012-05-20T07:42:00.000-05:00

Danger Mouse, Agent of S.H.I.E.L.D.?

I's Just A Simple Orc...

2012-05-19T21:16:00.000-05:00

... so I got no fluggerblunkin' clue what this here anonymoose comment be talkin' about:

Reduce it really is be getting pause, no more than I'm not much of quite frankly individual grown ups in all areas of thriving feature take their brains towards considered that people are headed each and every double-dip recession, Mityas described. He or she the well-known, but with, that actually just in case people type of analyzing very good double-dip shortcoming, a luxury scientific you'll see the original to very much glance at the distress the particular when baby deaths flows dicing opulence starts having lessen. Saks incurred folks an actual combined with angered really separate different kinds a huge in a position to disadvantaged compared to runs a huge moving say $ 70 per-cent within the fail of varied Lehman littermates the duration of .

It all sound very importants, though.

Dirty Ratters

2012-05-19T08:33:00.002-05:00

I knows what yer thinkin'. "Did he done slaughter six thousand pirates, or onlies five?" Ya know, in all the excitement, I kinda lost track meself. But seein' as yer standin' in a pile of what used ta be yer friends, an' I's twenty yards away with Charge off cooldown, an' as you only gots 1100 health an' this here be a Axe of the Tauren Chieftains wit' a full Nightfall mog, the most powerfuls pre-raid PvE axe in Azeroth, an' it will take yer scraggly head clean off, you jus' gotta ask yerself one thing: "Self, does I feel lucky?" Well, does ya, pirate?

Naw, I's jus' playin with ya. You ain't lucky.

I Don' Understands

2012-05-18T07:40:00.002-05:00

What were so terribles about her fashion sensationalizin'?

Is Where It Be A Bad Fuggin' Time Ta Be A Pirate

2012-05-14T06:00:00.000-05:00

So, the other day I was up in Everlook, sittin' with Bozz Frammerwhizzle, the local muckety-muck, an' drinkin' some Uncle Bonechomper's Day Old Piss, when I sez ta him,

"Hey, Bozz? We been doin' business tagethers now an' then fer what? over five years now? So how's come yer shopkeepers is only givin' me a 10% discount, insteada, say, 20%?"

"Well, Ratshag," he wheezed. "It's not that we aren't Honored to have you in our modern metropolis, but the 20% discounts need to be earned and, well, I'm afraid you just aren't there yet."

"Great googly moogly, I done done every flupperjubbin' mission what needs doin' here. Ain't no more buggers with yellow thingydoodles floatin' over they's heads. So what hell ya more wants me ta do?"

He done gave me a sly look. "You could ... maybe ... kill some pirates for us?"

Pirates. Always gotta be the damn pirates, when yer dealin' with these Steamwheedle goblins. They hates the competition. "Um, dude...." I sez, lookin' around. "We's in the mountains. There ain't no pirates, just yetis and them furbloggers."

"Oh, no, not here," sez Frammerwhizzle with a dismissive wave. "But if you could see your way to kill a few down by Booty Bay, that would do. I owe the Baron a favor, you see."

I shruggifalized. Booty Bay. Is some good horizontal refreshments down that way. "Okay," I sez. "'Bout how many dead pirates ya be needin'?"

"Not that many. I'd so, oh, nine thousand or so would suffice."

Nine thousand. Sure. While yer at it, pull the other one. Is got bells and jingly monkey paws on it. Nine glubbernunkin' thousand. It ain't what I cain't do it, seein' as I's amazingly virile an' all, but where hell I gonna find me nine housand pirates, all conveniently close ta each other so I ain't got sit around fer hours waitin' fer more ta show?

But a funny thing happened, shortlies after I got there an' started doin' jobs fer the locals, whackin' the odd pirate her or there. Them pirates done launched a full-scale attack on the town, thousands of 'em crammed inta the ships holds. That's right. Thousands. An' as long as I don't tell the Baron what I killed eight of them buggers already, they's trapped in the harbor. Can't leave. Ever. Just gonna sit there an' respawn every few seconds. Sumthin' about the Pirate Code an' needin' fer ta par-lay. I cain't be bothered fer ta remember the details.

Is time fer ta unleash hell. Gonna stack them bodies like poker chips in Vegas.

Sucks ta be a pirate this week.

Where The Wild Things Be

2012-05-09T10:36:00.001-05:00

Is a sad farewell ta the bugger what taught the Wild Things

ta Roar they's terrible Roars

and Gnash they's terrible Teeth

and Roll they's terrible Eyes

and Show they's terrible Claws

So long, bro. We'll see ya in the Night Kitchen.

Is Where Flinkalkkal Learns What A Windrunner Always Pays Her Debts

2012-05-02T07:48:00.001-05:00

Careful, lil' mon. Dem bosses don' like ta be called short.

You t'ink questionin' her like dat be a wise move?

An' den she killed him an' we ate him, mon. He were delicious.

They Ain't All "GO GO GO!!!"

2012-04-30T14:54:00.001-05:00

Some PuGs is more laid-backified.

Well This Blows

2012-04-27T05:00:00.000-05:00

Was many years ago I done wanted fer ta make meself a Truesilver Champion. Borgosh Corebender done sent me down ta Tanaris fer ta get a buncha wind elemental farts, 'cause they was needed. Here be what I had ta say about it at the time:

"You know, it's harder than it looks to get those elemental farts. First, you gotta find the mutherhumpers, which roam all over the desert instead of staying in one spot like good little demonic manifestations. Second, when you do find one, ya gotta kill it, and they're pretty dang tough for a gust of wind. Third, the desert is crawlin' with basilisks and hyenas and giant scorpions, which are all pretty tough themselves. Finally, once you find the thing and kill it, ya gotta real quick like catch the fart in a glass vial and put the stopper in before it escapes. But I finally figured out which sand dune the buggers were spawning on, set up my camping gear, took out every dang varmint that tried to climb on my dune, and went to work. Took about a day and a half, but I got meself four breaths of wind."

Mostlies what I remember about that weekend were the glubberfumpin' waiting. Waitin' fer a Gusting Vortex ta show itself. Wait some more. Wait some. Okay, there be one. Kill it. Okay, go back ta waitin'.

Show imaginify me reaction when I went back ta that same damn sand dune as part of me archeologifyin', an' I done saw this:

Yup, was Vortices Gustalatin' all overs the fluggerbugger. I coulda gotten me me four farts in like twenty minutes. If'n I still wanted'em. Which I don't no more, 'cause I already got'em.

Great Googly Moogly.

If'n Ratters Was A Blizzard Non-Combat Pet Designer

2012-04-26T09:20:00.001-05:00

Here's me suggestions fer some new pets ta add ta the game, fer the pit fightin' what we'll be doin' when Mists of Pandemonium done go live. Is one fer each category. Feels free fer ta use these, Blizz. Is no charge.

Aquatic: the Dreaded Armored Squid. Just as scary as it sounds.

Beast: Lil' Hank McCoy. Has with an' without blue fur versions.

Critter: Great googly moogly, ain't there enough critters alreadies? Fine, um, Varmint. Comes in colors - Brown Varmint, Black Varmint, Red Varmint.

Dragonkin: Zebra Whelp, 'cause them vertical stripes be slimming.

Elemental: Dallop of Whipped Cream. We ain't had enough representatives from the Plane of Deserts in the game. They's pissed about gettin' left outta Cata.

Flying: Fuhg. Ya can gives one an' everything.

Humanoid: Lil' Jack Sparrow. Wait. Sorries. Lil' Cap'n Jack Sparrow.

Magic: A top hat with bunny feet stickin' out. Hops around, like.

Mechanical: Remembers that Mythbusters episode where they done used a rocket snowplow fer ta cut a car in half? Yeah, one of thems, only little. The rocket snowplow, not the bifurcalated car.

Undead: Lil' Keith Richards.

Who's Got The Right Stuff Now, Beeyatch?

2012-04-24T15:19:00.000-05:00

So in our last poll, James Bond's tuxedo put in a solid performance, receiving 62 votes ta Chuck Yeagers's flight suit's 31 and Madonna's Egypto-Greco-Burlesquo-inspired .... thing's 17. Spiffy.

This week, we's lookin' at two of the biggest badarses evers what ain't me. Make yer choice in the sidebar, as usuals.

Transmogaflirtation

2012-04-22T15:21:00.000-05:00

Maurice: Hello, my sweet magical buttercup. I am Maurice, the Death Knight of Looove. I am here in the Halls of Reflection to find for myself some new armor for the Transmogalypse. Gauntlets, perhaps, an also some pauldrons. I know, you were expecting five heroes, but ha ha! I am heroic enough, all on my own! Perhaps, when I am finished, you and I, we could do some, how you say? Reflecting, yes that is it, reflecting of our own. I am, after all a very handsome man, dead, yes, but still most handsome. And you, you have a delightful belly, with just the right curves to satisfy a man such as myself, and surprisingly high above the ground, no? Yes? Come, my scrumptious sarsaparilla of sweet, sweet surrender, shall we not yield to the inevitable? You feel it too, do you not? The energy, the chemistry, it pulls us together, makes us yearn for one another, makes you hunger for the loving only a true man can offer. Come, give yourself to me, and we shall be as thunder and ice upon the shore! What say you, beauteous woman?

Jaina: Shh, I'm trying to think here.

Death Knugget Of Bad Arsed Epicosity

2012-04-19T07:50:00.002-05:00

Is big hairy Congo rats ta Maurice fer the double cheevement last night. In a surprise move, he now be the Team's best geared tank - was thanks ta Varo'then the Sap droppin' his brooch. Maurice sez he's gonna be standin' by the Stormwind mailbox all weekend ladies, feels free ta come by an' swoon.

One Sentence

2012-04-13T07:44:00.000-05:00

"Yay, we five done cleared the Dungeon of Nasty Things, and killed the Demon What Drops Phat Lewt! Bob an' Fred, you guys did a real good job, so thankee. Susan and Marie, you both look real purdy."

Can ya see why this ain't cool, and oughtta be changed, even if'n it don't offends you personally? If not, well then.

Try. Again.

Meanwhiles, if ya thinks what changin' one sentence means an NPC ain't no longer unique an' colorful an' interestin', then he weren't really all that ta begin with, was he?

Just Another Day In Blog Azeroth

2012-04-11T10:00:00.001-05:00

[09:50] Rev: what's new?
[09:50] Ratshag: exalted with Therazane
[09:50] Rev: yay!
[09:51] Ratshag: (again)
[09:51] Rev: did she grab your ass?
[09:51] Ratshag: and slipped me the tongue
[09:51] Rev: mmmmm
[09:51] Jed: i...dont think i did that daily

TRANSMOGALYPSE! Unintended Consequences Edition

2012-04-11T07:20:00.001-05:00

So, Ellspeth done went ta Ungoro Crater recentlies, and....

Wait, why is the little hoppy fish man staring at my forehead? OMG, am I getting a zit? No, that's impossible - I sacrificed those three babies to Uzglquotzl the Devourer for eternally unblemished skin.... Is there a bug on me? Did someone write something on me in permanent ink while I was asleep? Was it my voidwalker? Ratters, WHY IS THE LITTLE HOPPY FISH MAN STARING AT MY FOREHEAD???

Some Definitions

2012-04-10T07:52:00.000-05:00

Oceanographer. noun One who studies the branch of physical geography dealing with the ocean.

Limnologist. noun One who studies bodies of fresh water, such as lakes and ponds, with reference to their physical, geographical, biological, and other features.

Bugfuhg crazy OCD amazingly virile orc what ain't right in the head an' has way too much fluggernubbin' time. noun One who flies all overs Azeroth an' beyond fer ta get both achievements in a day.

They Won't Dance. Don't Ask Them.

2012-04-07T14:02:00.002-05:00

"'Cause yer friends don't dance, an' if they don't dance then they's no friends of mine," said Heigan the Unclean Undies, an' Phoenicia an' her friends said "pfffft." Then they proceeded fer ta burn his diseased arse down before he done made it ta Phase Two. No dancin' required. An fer icin' on the cake, he caughed up the wee li'l mace what Phoe had been hankerin' for fer her transmogalypse set.

Mrs Potts Done Has The Soul Of A True Warrior

2012-04-06T14:49:00.000-05:00

Gots fer ta respect ceramic tableware what ain't afraids fer ta get it on.

via

Is April Fools Drunken Singin' Featurin' Galertruby An' The Dragonettes

2012-04-01T15:42:00.000-05:00

Alex and Ysera, they's kinda at loose ends now what they ain't immortal Aspects no mores. Alex, she got like five thousand drakelings drivin' her nuts day an' night, pesterin' her ta turn Grim Batol inta a casino / destination resort and the like, an' Ysera's mom's been callin' her wantin' fer ta know when she'd gonna find herself a nice dragon with a steady job an' get hitched (mom ain't gettin' any younger, ya know). So when young Galertruby done asked'em fer ta come sing backup on his Kalimdor / North American tour, they jumped at the chance.

Galertruby:
Glah gallah agglaha gha
Arlhgha aggl galha gaha ...hic!
Gahlglaha gha glahgal ahlgrah
Glagglh algha galargh glaha

The Dragonettes:
Galertruby, oh no
Me gotta go ...hic!
Aye-yi-yi-yi, I said
Galertruby, oh baby ...hic!
Me gotta go

Galertruby:
Aglha-gha-glahagl ahl ...hic!
Galha aggl glahagl ahg
Glagha gaha alhgra ghla
Ghagaga ahl gahrgla galhg ...hic!

The Dragonettes:
Galertruby, oh no
Me gotta go
Aye-yi-yi-yi, I shaid
Galertruby, oh baby
Me gotta go ...hic!

Galertruby:
Glalg gha!

Is thanks ta the Kingsmen fer the lyrics, intelligibles an' otherwise.

Is Where Fink Gets A Theology Lesson

2012-03-28T08:22:00.000-05:00

When scripted interactions gets a little old an' stale, an' there ain't no flubbernuggin' fast-forward button, well, then, ya gots fer ta make yer own freshness.

"Deserve"'s Got Nuthin' Ta Do With It

2012-03-23T17:30:00.000-05:00

We heroes, we done hunted down the Betrayer, the Lich King, the Destroyer. We's saved the world time an' again. They build statues fer ta honor us even, sometimes.

Do we deserve it?

Like Will Munny, I's killed women and children. I's killed everything what walks or crawls at one time or another. I's slaughtered not onlies them what stood against me, but they's children, they's parents, whoevers were hidin' in them houses and huts in Hillsbrad an' Windyreed Village an' an' Bladespire an' Skorn. I may not've seen'em, hidin' in the shadows, but I heard they's screamin' as they's homes burned down around them. Me hands is thoroughly drenched in blood, and they ain't never gonne be clean.

An' you buggers is no different.

Why we done these things? Because we come from a people what be teeterin' on the edge of extinction after the wars of the past decades, and we's gonna be damn sure if someone goes over the edge it'll be them an' not us. We do it 'cause lives is cheap an' food an' beer ain't, so we do what thems what be payin' us asks fer. We do it 'cause we's stone cold killin' machines.

Killin's the only thing what most of us was ever good at.

Over at WoW Insider, Anne Stickney be askin' if Garrosh deserves fer ta die. Mebbe. His hands be pretty fuhggin' bloody too. An' mebbe they's gonna get bloodier. But I ain't seein' what ya can say they's bloodier than us heroes' hands. Now, if'n someone pays us fer ta kill him, will kill him. 'Cause it's what we do, not because he's dirty an' we's clean.

"Deserve"'s got nuthin ta do with it.

Mebbe They Should Re-release The Movie In 3D With A CGI Alien

2012-03-22T11:48:00.002-05:00

The readers done spoken, and Bart Simpson convincingly done smacked down ET, 78 ta 39.

This time around we gots a three-way goin'. Is up in the sidebar, as per usuals.

TRANSMOGALYPSE! Kalishna: Abs Of Saronite

2012-03-21T11:18:00.000-05:00

Kali don't contribute much ta the blog - when ya gots the personality of the Terminator's little sister, writing don't come natural. But she do be a solid member of the Team, handlin' our Horde-side inscription an' jewelcuttin' needs, an' doin' her share of killin' bad guys 'cause the good guys pay her to. An' like the rest of us she wanted fer ta put tagether a moggin' outfit what said "this is me", where "me" in this case done means "heavily muscled killin' machine".

Ya can mebbe see why Kalishna be a girl after me own heart.

So anywho, here be what she come up with. Is got a lotta ties ta the traditional Acherus Death Knugget get up, but also branches out a bit fer ta make it more personals.

Head: Acherus Knight's Hood
Shoulders: Blood-Soaked Saronite Plated Shoulders
Chest: Ornate Mithril Breastplate
Gloves: Bloodbane's Gauntlets of Command
Back: Worn Stoneskin Gargoyle Cape
Waist: Jouster's Girdle
Legs: Ornate Mithril Pants
Feet: Greaves of the Slaughter
Weapon: De-Raged Waraxe

Suffer well.