Neil Mallett: The Bashed blog

I don't want to be interesting any more.

2015-10-27T18:43:00.001+00:00

We all get ill, some more than others. I got ill in January 2014, now at the end of October 2015, I'm still unwell and currently sat on my Nottingham hospital bed.

I'm still undiagnosed, a mystery to modern medicine. I do still expect to be fit and well again at some point, I just have no idea when. From a distance, I look mostly fine I guess, a bit overweight and slow perhaps but if you don't know me, you'd probably assume that I'm fit and healthy. Get closer however, and you'll hear my laboured breathing. I get fluid where there is not supposed to be fluid, on my lungs, around my heart, in my stomach and down my legs, it comes and goes but seems to really stick around my right lung, hence my breathing difficulties. It took me an hour or so to get my breath back from having a shower this afternoon. Sometimes I struggle just to get out of bed. I've had countless tests for everything imaginable, some very painful, some just uncomfortable and a few that don't really bother me at all anymore. Someone took blood this morning, I barely noticed. I've been given various medicines in the hope that one of them might just work but so far nothing has had any meaningful effect, with the exception of a regular steroid dose. So, here I am, in hospital, where I have been for over 4 months out of the last 22. Still ill, still a mystery.

I do just about anything to pass the time, including writing this blog post. I'm not doing it just to complain, writing stuff down helps a lot, it even becomes medicine in a way. Letting it all out instead of keeping it all in is good for the soul, or so it is said.

A couple of days ago, I was visited by a couple of young doctors. They are in the last few months of their training and as part of their course they need to speak to real patients as if they were that patients consultant. It makes sense when you think about it, within a year, they will be doing it for real after all. I was happy to oblige, I told them the whole story and went through my entire health history, as best as I can remember it at least. I'm happy to help where I can and it passed some more boring hospital time. Then at the end of our chat, they told me why they came to speak to me.

They'd been in a meeting with my consultant and he'd told them that I would be an 'interesting' patient to talk to. They said thanks and left but that word stuck in my head. Interesting!

I really don't want to be interesting, I'm literally and metaphorically sick of being 'interesting' now. I want to be uninteresting to all medical staff, I want to go back to being someone who sees his GP twice a year at most, I want to go to clinics only to get my flu jab every autumn, the only time I want to ever see the inside of a hospital again is when I'm visiting a sick friend or relative. No offence intended doctors, but I really don't want you to find me interesting at all.

Until January 2014, I was a reasonably fit middle aged man, then my fitness was just turned off, I can't express just how frustrating that is. There are do many things I used to just do without giving it a second thought, now even taking a photo can be difficult. I get worn out by almost anything, even talking. I know they don't mean to be annoying when they call me interesting but that is exactly what I now feel when I hear that word.

Please, stop finding me interesting, find me a pill that fixes me and send me home where I can be uninteresting again.

My Halloween pic

2013-11-03T09:22:00.001+00:00

I seem to have done this - http://instagram.com/p/gPznERF8zt/ - on instagram

Shot on a farm near Birmingham with my Nokia 808 pure view then #awesomized on my jail broken iPod touch and finally published on Instagram.

2013-05-19T20:52:00.001+00:00

I seem to have done this - http://instagram.com/p/ZgdR09l86o/ - on instagram

I give you my #awesomized heart.

2013-03-14T09:09:00.001+00:00

I seem to have done this - http://instagr.am/p/W1RS1hF84z/ - on instagram

#awesomized fifi

2013-03-14T08:53:00.001+00:00

I seem to have done this - http://instagr.am/p/W1Piwfl84G/ - on instagram

#awesomized

2013-02-18T18:01:00.001+00:00

I seem to have done this - http://instagr.am/p/V4bHeYl83a/ - on instagram

Brekky.

2012-11-28T09:54:00.001+00:00

I seem to have done this - http://instagr.am/p/SkZ_Ztl81c/ - on instagram

What no shower?

2012-11-27T19:06:00.001+00:00

I seem to have done this - http://instagr.am/p/Si0c22F8-A/ - on instagram

Not my photo, but I liked it.

2012-10-16T10:44:00.001+00:00

I seem to have done this - http://instagr.am/p/Q1xZYNF82w/ - on instagram

Rainy night in new Hythe.

2012-10-15T20:44:00.001+00:00

I seem to have done this - http://instagr.am/p/Q0Rst5F88_/ - on instagram

No whining today

2012-08-22T21:46:00.001+00:00

My video from the National firework championships at Belvior castle last Saturday. [18/08/2012] Cheers, Neil Mallett.

Pntlss abrvtn

2012-08-21T07:10:00.001+00:00

Whilst reading reviews of hotels and holidays online over the weekend I became irritated by what I consider pointless abreviatons. Why write 'gr8 hotel' when you could put 'The hotel we stayed in (name of hotel) was great, it was clean and tidy, the pool was never too busy, the food was varied, tasty and plentiful, we slept well in the comfortable bed and really liked the excellent ensuite facilities.' - the first example is rubbish, it tells you nothing in a really poor manner, the second example, well, that's a review, clear and simple with good information. Why wouldn't you use the latter? If you want to get a point across, it will always be better in good plain English.

This shortening of letters started in the early days of the internet, I was there and yes, I used abreviations. It was needed then, we had dial up modems with very slow speeds and as long as you were connected you were paying by the minute and using up the phone line. Getting your message across quickly was important and this led to the development of the Smiley and TLA's such as LOL and BRB.

These things are now common in SMS messaging and Twitter although there is no real need as both have a 140 character limit, usually more than enough for the average ten or so word message. Gr8 really isn't great and I'm sure mates are better than m8's. I was tempted to refer to this trend as childish but in my experience it's not kids that do this, it's people who really should know better. English always worked well before you got a mobile phone, if you try it, you'll find it still does and people will thank you for it.

English, the most widely used language in the world, sometimes confusing, sometimes accidently funny, always beautiful when used properly. Please don't abuse it, there really is no need.

Neil

brb ;-)

Why Bashed?

2012-08-20T03:25:00.001+00:00

When I used to play on-line games, Bashed was my gamer name. I still use this name on various places around the internet. I have other more specific blogs about my photography and Cambridge weight plan, including facebook pages so I was just going to ditch this blog but have decided to keep it and use the Bashed moniker to represent my grumpier side. So 'Bashed', in this instance is about how life sometimes Bashes me around, or a slightly exaggerated version of it anyway. So I'm going to grumble here, just grumble and moan about everything and anything to get it off my chest. It doesn't really matter if it gets read or not, I very much doubt that many will find my grumbles interesting enough to stop by more than once but I don't really care, moaning is good for you. Bashed is also a reference to being a 'Rail enthusiast' or Train spotter as I prefer to say, so I will continue to blog about my occasional forays into the world of trains too. So there you have it, that's why I'm 'Bashed'

Rant!

2010-12-16T13:54:00.004+00:00

I don't 'blog' often, I just don't have the time or the will to bother mostly but my recent dealing with Expedia pissed me off so much...

The Background.

We booked a few days in New York with friends for spring next year. One of our flights [the outbound] was cancelled, we don't know why, that's just the way it is. Obviously we had to do something because we need to go in order to come back. I called Expedia and waited the required 24 minutes for an answer from an English speaking person who was ready to take my order, once it became clear that I'd already paid and just needed to sort out the new flight time, well, I was put through to the 'we've already got his money, just annoy the fuck out of him 'til he hangs up department', which it seems is based in Bangladesh. This involves someone speaking and occasionally shouting at you down the phone with a comedy 5 second satellite delay for added annoyance.

Me - 'I want to change the flight 'cos you cancelled it.'

Ryan - [yes really, that's what he said, it's a popular Asian name.] Mumble mumble, hello.. sir can you hear me?

Me - Yes, I can hear you [I have no idea what you are saying but I CAN hear you]

Ryan - OK, mumble mumble, change mumble mumble flight to Amsterdam mum - Me NO! Ryan- continues, I can do that for you now sir mumble mumble.

Me - [Staying blissfully calm] No, no, no, New York, we are going to New York, it's in the USA.

Ryan - yes, mumble mumble, put you on hold... [cue very annoying tune on 10 second loop]

After 24 minutes...

'Hello sir my name is Jenny, how can I help you?'

Me - [Oh thank fuck] Hi, Jenny, how are you?

Jenny - Hello, can you hear me?

Me - Yes, that's why I just said hello and asked you how you are y'see.

Jenny - Mumble mumble

Me - Oh Fuck!

OK, you get the picture, that went on for 2 hours the first day then my wife had a go and lasted another hour. Our friends also made calls and went through the same telephonic hell. So, today our friends contact me and tell us they have had success and managed to get everything changed and asked them to call me to arrange the same for us. I waited an hour, nobody called so I heroically picked up the phone and with a plastic smile glued to my face, I called them again.

They answered straight away and it was, as far as I could tell, a native, a genuine English speaker, a slight accent but I understood him perfectly, my lucky day. 'I'll just put you through to the relevant department', 'OK' I said, barely hiding the tremble in my voice...

...after 24 minutes 'James' answered the phone, James, unfortunately, was from the 'we've already got his money, just annoy the fuck out of him 'til he hangs up department', he's very good at his job.

I emailed Expedia - I've yet to receive an answer.

/rant

UPDATE: I received a reply from Syed, I have to wonder if that's an English person pretending to be an Asian, anyway, he told me he can't deal with me because it's got nothing to do with me as I'm only the one who's actually flying and has wasted so much of this miserable week trying to reorganise the flight that they cancelled. Obviously, I'm just not involved enough for him to speak to.
I've replied from the other email address to confirm that he can in fact deal with this disinterested party after all.

Can anyone hear steam?

Update 2: Sorted. Wife got home, we made another call. Got a nice apologetic chap called Stephen who decided to sort it out himself, it wasn't easy because of the way the system works but he did it. Thanks Stephen. I wish we had spoken to him first. Why does it have to be so hard?

RSG at Kirkham Abbey

2010-07-26T22:32:00.001+00:00

RSG at Kirkham Abbey.jpg
Originally uploaded by Bashed

I took a slight diversion on the way home from Whitby to see this magnificent beast again. What a great location to stumble across.

How to celebrate your national day.

2010-04-23T11:16:00.014+00:00

Completely ignore it/Pretend it's not happening, like Tesco.

Put the cross of St George on your Renault, that'll show those Frenchies.

Find an old, crumpled national flag and display 2/3rds of it.

Drink reduced price foreign lager.

Return an Italian toaster to Argos, get your money back, spend it on foreign Lager

Find a cheap, foreign made, seriously creased national flag, [make sure it says 'ENGLAND' in large letters because how else would you know which flag it was?], put it in your shop window and with supreme irony make sure the advertisement for your ironing service can clearly be seen over it.

[CLICK THE PICTURE TO SEE IT LARGER]

I don't have a picture for this one but it's my favourite - get in your car to come home, take the roof off to take in the glorious sunshine, [oh yes] turn the radio on just as Ralph Mctell comes on singing England.

If you don't know this song, check it out using the links below, oh and please send me an MP3 version of it if you find one.

Live version - http://5z8.info/banned-in-the-US_e5r1m_launchexe

Studio Version with pictures - http://5z8.info/cockfights_z7l4s_--INITIATE-CREDIT-CARD-XFER--

Lea road box-inside

2009-02-12T10:31:00.003+00:00

Lea road box-inside
Originally uploaded by Bashed.

Goodbye to Lea road signal box.

Lea road box-Front

2009-02-12T10:31:00.001+00:00

Lea road box-Front
Originally uploaded by Bashed.

Goodbye to Lea road signal box

Lea road box-back

2009-02-12T10:30:00.003+00:00

Lea road box-back
Originally uploaded by Bashed.

Goodbye to Lea road signal box

Lea road box-Approach

2009-02-12T10:30:00.001+00:00

Lea road box-Approach
Originally uploaded by Bashed.

Goodbye to Lea road signal box

I can take it

2008-01-06T12:30:00.001+00:00

Looking for payday loans?

Is it Christmas?

2007-12-02T12:43:00.001+00:00

http://www.isitchristmas.com/

Madness NW5

2007-11-28T16:16:00.000+00:00

Madness are releasing the superb NW5 in January as a single. Check out the video now RIGHT HERE. -
http://myspacetv.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoid=22498483

Safe!

2007-11-28T04:09:00.000+00:00

http://ru.fishki.net/picsw/022007/28/bestphoto/winter/082_winter_60236.jpg

Gainsborough Lea road as a terminus.

2007-09-12T13:47:00.001+00:00

Click the pic for the ful set.

153304
Originally uploaded by Bashed.