Paging Dr. NerdLove

What "Forged In Fire" Can Teach Us About Manhood

Transcript available at doctornerdlove.com

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#154 — Building Incredible Emotional Strength And Powerful Confidence

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 05 Nov 2020 04:03:20 +0000

Right now, we are living through the most stressful, even outright traumatic year that most of have ever faced in our lives. Even if you're in a relatively good place, we're all getting hit with bad news, more stories of police violence, political corruption, the continuing pandemic, even potential fallout from the election. It can be incredibly hard to have a positive attitude and solid confidence. It can be hard not to look around and say "how am I supposed to have the strength to keep going?"

But you need that emotional strength, powerful confidence and positive attitude more than ever. And the first step is to recognize the things that are stealing your happiness and sabotaging your life and learn how to build the emotional strength it takes to persevere, that appealing confidence and the positive attitude that can help build strong relationships and help you face and overcome the challenges in your life that seem impossible.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

Why one simple word can ruin your self-confidence
How we convince ourselves that we're powerless... when we're not
The mistake we make that makes us miserable... no matter what we do
How we talk ourselves out of success
Why your rivals can be your greatest allies

... and so much more.

You Are Your Own Worst Enemy

"Your Attitude Controls Your Dating Success"

Transcript available at doctornerdlove.com

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#153 — The Secret to Healthier, Stronger Relationships

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Wed, 21 Oct 2020 04:30:00 +0000

Have you struggled with relationships that were bad for you?

Maybe you've been in a toxic relationship with somebody who was always manipulating you into ways of getting what they wanted, leaving you feeling like a doormat. Maybe you had friends who treated you badly or would pressure you into going along with jokes at your expense or doing things that made you uncomfortable or went against your values.

Or perhaps you've had family members who would leverage guilt or reciprocity to make you do whatever they want, even if it's a huge inconvenience to you or emotionally draining or even damaging. Or you were constantly being made to feel as though your interests, desires or wants were unimportant or inconvenient… even if it's simply "don't treat me like sh*t."

One of the most important things you can do to ensure you have strong, healthy relationships — with your wife or girlfriend, your friends, your family or even your co-workers — is to have strong boundaries.

Today, I'm going to teach you how to build strong boundaries... and how to enforce them.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

What one viral video teaches us about toxic relationships
Why abusers and toxic people prey on people with weak boundaries
How abusers trick you into lowering your boundaries for them
How to push back when people push against your boundaries
The most important part of maintaining healthy relationships

...and so much more

Enforcing Your Boundaries

How Do I Avoid Abusive Relationships?

How Do I Get My Family To Respect My Boundaries?

Transcript available at doctornerdlove.com

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#152 — This Is What Nobody Tells You About Having ADHD

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Wed, 07 Oct 2020 04:30:00 +0000

Growing up, I knew I was struggling with things that other people seemed to be able to do without a second thought. I thought I was just lazy, that I needed to be more disciplined and to take things more seriously. But it never worked, and I never understood why.

Now, after a lifetime of searching, I finally have the answers.

This week, I want to talk with you about my experiences with having been diagnosed with ADHD as an adult, how it can affect you and your relationships, and my experiences with getting diagnosed and getting treated.

Here's what happened.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

What people get wrong about ADHD
Why so many people don't get diagnosed or treated when they need it
How having ADHD can affect your confidence and your relationships
Why people with ADHD have anxiety and depression
How getting treatment has changed my life

...and so much more.

RELATED LINKS:

Overcome Your Fear of Rejection - https://www.doctornerdlove.com/overcome-your-fear-of-rejection/

Top 5 Dating Mistakes — https://www.doctornerdlove.com/top-5-dating-mistakes/

This is What Happened After I Tried Meditation for 30 Days — https://www.doctornerdlove.com/this-is-what-happened-after-30-days-of-meditation/

You Must Unlearn What You Have Learned — https://www.doctornerdlove.com/how-to-unlearn-what-you-have-learned/

When It's Time To Ask For Help — https://www.doctornerdlove.com/when-its-time-to-ask-for-help/

ADHD In Adults — https://www.additudemag.com/adhd-in-adults/

Transcript available at doctornerdlove.com

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#151 — The 5 Things You Need to Know About Dating

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 24 Sep 2020 05:30:00 +0000

The #1 reason why so many men struggle with dating is very simple: they don't know what it takes to be successful with women. Attraction isn't a checklist; having all the right "stats" isn't going to magically make you attractive to women. Learning to succeed with women isn't about having the right car or the right body, it's about learning how to become your best, most desirable self.

That's why this week, I'm going to teach you the 5 things YOU need to know in order to succeed with women, become the man you've always wanted to be and build the love life you've always wanted.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

Why the men who have everything women want still struggle with dating
How to build your dream life... by working backwards from success
Why attraction ISN'T about your body, your height, or your income
How to escape the trap of your comfort zone
Why your own brain tricks you into failing with women

...and so much more.

RELATED LINKS:

NerdLove Academy Merchandise

Book a Private Coaching Session

Level Up: Facing Your Dating Fears

How To Take Your Love Life To The Next Level

"I Took The Red Pill. Why Am I Still Not Happy?"

What Women Wish Men Knew About Attraction

The Value of Failure

Transcript available at doctornerdlove.com

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Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

#150 — Stop Being Afraid Of Rejection

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Wed, 09 Sep 2020 05:00:00 +0000

Rejection hurts... but the fear of rejection can often hurt even worse. In fact, when we give into the fear of rejection, we often set up a pattern that can affect us throughout our lives. Rejections we've experienced in the past can end up affecting us NOW. When we give into the fear of rejection, we can end up reliving that fear, long after it's happened... feeling the pain as though it's happening to us again, right now. When that happens, it becomes a way that we almost give up our free will; life becomes a series of steps that you take to try to AVOID feeling the discomfort and pain of rejection.

It's time to learn how to break the cycle and learn how to stop letting your fear control you.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

What science can teach us about rejection and rejection sensitivity
How our brains work against us and keep us in a cycle of fear and avoidance
Why rejection hurts, even years later
How a fear of rejection can CAUSE the very rejection we're trying to avoid
How understanding your body can help you conquer your fear of rejection

...and so much more.

RELATED LINKS:

Face Your Dating Fears

Overcome Your Fear of Rejection

A Man's Guide To Improving Your Emotional IQ

This is What Happens After Meditating for 30 Days

How To Deal With the Awkward

Rejection Sensitivity and the Defensive Motivational System: Insights From the Startle Response to Rejection Cues

How ADHD Ignites Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria

The Social Skills Survival Pack Playlist

Transcript available at doctornerdlove.com
Send your dating advice questions to doc@doctornerdlove.com

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#149 — How Do You Know if She's Right For You?

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 27 Aug 2020 04:00:00 +0000

What makes one relationship last, while another falls apart? Why do you seem to have found your dream relationship, only to have it turn into a nightmare? Your partner may seem perfect, but it takes more than shallow commonalities to make a relationship work. Just because things are amazing in the beginning doesn't mean that everything is going to work out on it's own.

If you've ever wondered whether she's "the one", or you want to know if your relationship has what it takes to go the distance, then you need to answer these questions.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

Why people end up in cycles of relationships that SEEM great, but fall apart within six months
How "New Relationship Energy" can hide relationship destroying flaws
What you REALLY need to have in common to make a relationship last
Why the way you fight may be more important than your "love languages"
What sexual compatibility REALLY means

... and so much more.

RELATED LINKS:

Are You Ready For A Girlfriend? — https://www.doctornerdlove.com/are-you-ready-for-a-girlfriend/

Is She Right For You? — https://www.doctornerdlove.com/is-she-right-for-you/

5 Questions You Should Ask Before You Start Your Next Relationship — https://www.doctornerdlove.com/5-questions-you-should-ask-when-you-start-relationship/

Are You Sexually Compatible? — https://www.doctornerdlove.com/are-you-sexually-compatible/

How To Have The "Defining The Relationship" Talk — https://www.doctornerdlove.com/defining-the-relationship/

Transcript available at doctornerdlove.com

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Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

#148 — What Avatar: The Last Airbender Can Teach Us About Finding Redemption

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 13 Aug 2020 04:00:00 +0000

It's very easy to feel like you're forever going to be defined by your worst decisions or your biggest mistakes. But while you can't change your past, you can change your future. By examining one of the best redemption arcs in modern media, we can learn how Prince Zuko overcame trauma and earned his redemption... and find how we can learn to find our own in the process.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

How our response to trauma can shape our lives... and why it can transform us into different people
Why a desire for acceptance can turn people into villains
How to make a break with the past to build a new future
Why it's so hard to make amends
Why you have to let go of your desire to be "right"

...and so much more

RELATED LINKS:

How Do You Find Redemption? — https://www.doctornerdlove.com/find-redemption/

How Toxic Masculinity Hurts Everyone — https://www.doctornerdlove.com/toxic-masculinity/

Recovering From Failure — https://www.doctornerdlove.com/recovering-from-failure/

Why It's So Hard To Be A Good Man — https://www.doctornerdlove.com/why-is-it-so-hard-to-be-a-good-man/

Solving The Incel Phenomenon — https://www.doctornerdlove.com/incel-phenomenon/

Transcript available at doctornerdlove.com

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#147 — How to Talk To Anyone (At Any Time)

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 23 Jul 2020 05:00:00 +0000

One reason why a lot of guys have a hard time meeting women is because they've put ALL of their focus on ONLY talking to women, and even then, only women that they're attracted to.

The truth is that the most popular and socially successful men — the ones who do the best with women — tend to be the ones who talk to everyone. Part of the secret to their success is that they know how to connect with people and build relationships that lead to the results they're looking for, whether it's networking, making new friends or meeting and dating new and amazing women.

They're able to start conversations and talk with just about everyone they meet. And today, I'm going to teach you how.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

How you can start a conversation with anyone at any time
When you should approach people directly, and when you should use a more indirect approach to start a conversation
Why asking a stranger for a favor helps turn them into friends
How to get people to come talk to you
What the most socially successful people do that makes them instantly magnetic

...and so much more.

RELATED LINKS:

5 Signs Women Want You To Approach Them

Never Run Out Of Things To Talk About

5 Secrets to Make People Like You

The Science of Nice Guys and Assholes

Transcript available at doctornerdlove.com

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#146 — How To Transform Your Life (With Arden Leigh)

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Wed, 08 Jul 2020 05:00:00 +0000

What does it take to turn your life around? How can you learn to recognize negative patterns in your life that are sabotaging your progress? And what does it take to break those patterns and make positive lasting changes?

This week, I've invited my friend and coach Arden Leigh of The Repatterning Project to talk about how to recognize the patterns in your life that are holding you back and what it takes to transform yourself so that you can find stronger, healthier and more positive relationships.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

How we create and reinforce patterns in our lives
Why certain patterns and behaviors keep you from meeting your needs
What your moods and mindfulness can tell you about the patterns in your life
How your social circle can help transform your life
Why "Is this working for me?" is the most important question you can ask

...and so much more.

——————————————
About Arden Leigh:
Arden Leigh is the creator and facilitator of The Re-Patterning Project, a course in understanding the human operating system and repatterning trauma imprints and social conditioning in order to achieve creative freedom. Her certifications are in neuro-linguistic programming and TimeLine Therapy. She is also the creator and frontwoman of indie pop rock project Arden and the Wolves, as well as the creator and host of web series Peace Talks. She is currently at work on her next book.

Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/ItsMeArdenLeigh
Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/ItsMeArdenLeigh
The Repatterning Project — therepatterningproject.com
Arden and the Wolves — facebook.com/ardenandthewolves
——————————————

#145 — The Problem with "Nice Guys"

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 18 Jun 2020 04:00:00 +0000

Women often say that they want a nice guy, so why do so many of them think that nice guys are THE WORST?

The trouble is that Nice Guy's behavior works against them; what they see as positive and respectful is actually pushing people away.

Here's why being a Nice Guy drives women away... and why it can be so hard to STOP being a Nice Guy.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

What "Nice Guy" behavior says about them
Why "treating her like a queen" is actually unattractive
How Nice Guys ruin their relationships
The #1 mistake Nice Guys make that "bad boys" don't
What it takes to STOP being a nice guy... and why being a jerk isn't the answer

... and so much more.

RELATED LINKS:

Developing An Abundance Mentality

Eliminating Neediness

What's Wrong With Being a Nice Guy?

FIND YOUR VALUE AND DEVELOP YOUR SELF-CONFIDENCE! GET YOUR FREE WORKSHEET HERE: http://eepurl.com/dgn7c5

Transcript available at doctornerdlove.com

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#144 — Use This Mindset To Overcome Your Self-Limiting Beliefs

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 04 Jun 2020 04:30:00 +0000

Over the course of my career, I've dealt with a lot of people who haven't had much dating experience — from people who've only had one or two girlfriends in their lives to literal 40 year old virgins.

They all had in one thing common: they had the same fears, beliefs and anxieties regarding dating and women that made them give up.

Here's how to break through your dating fears, conquer your anxiety and overcome your self-limiting beliefs.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

How we project our anxieties onto other people
How self-limiting beliefs hold us back
Why our brains trick us into giving up
Why we give up control so easily
How to let go of fear

...and so much more.

RELATED LINKS:

Your Attitude Controls Your Dating Success

These Self-Limiting Beliefs are Holding You Back

Develop An Abundance Mentality

The Value of Failure

Transcript available at doctornerdlove.com

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Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

Bonus Episode: Ask Dr. NerdLove Anything!

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 28 May 2020 00:09:39 +0000

This week, we have a special bonus episode: a live episode where my patrons got to ask me anything — from dating advice to moving to Austin to what shows I've been binging during the lockdown. Plus guest appearances from Mr. Senior Kitty!

If you want to take part in the next AMA, be sure to support the podcast by becoming a Dr. NerdLove patron!

SIGN UP FOR THE DATING ACCELERATOR PROGRAM

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Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

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#143 — The Art of Sexting Like A Gentleman

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 21 May 2020 04:30:00 +0000

Sexting and knowing how to flirt over text is a skill that's invaluable whether you have a friends-with-benefits relationship, a long-distance relationship, or if you and your partner are looking to keep things exciting.

In fact, knowing how to start sexting with someone the right way may be one of the most invaluable skills you can develop for keeping the spark in your relationship.

But you have to know how to get things started the right way.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

How to lay the groundwork to start sexting with your partner
Why the right text can be sexier than any photo
What to say to a woman over text to turn her on
Why most guys FAIL at sexting
What to say to start sharing pictures

... and so much more

How To Look Good in Photos

What Women Want in Men

Take The Perfect Tinder Photo

F*ck Like A Gentleman

SIGN UP FOR THE DATING ACCELERATOR PROGRAM

Transcript available at doctornerdlove.com

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Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

#142 — 5 Things You Need To Get Your Life Together

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 07 May 2020 04:00:00 +0000

How happy are you with your life right now? If you're like most people, you probably have a list of major changes you've wanted to make. You may even have looked at the current pandemic as your chance to work on yourself and get your life where you want it to be.

Now tell me, how far HAVE you gotten on that list? The odds are not very far. You probably attacked it like a man possessed… only to find your motivation and desire drained away. Now you're basically back where you started, just more frustrated than before and wondering why you're such a failure.

Except, you're not a failure. Honestly, you were always going to end up in this situation. Because here's a secret: this was always going to backfire on you because you — like most people — were going about this the wrong way.

That's why,. Let's do this.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

What everyone gets wrong about self-improvement
Why your problem isn't a lack of discipline or willpower
How you accidently sabotage your own progress
Why most self-improvement plans fall apart within weeks, if not days
How ritual and routine leads to success

... and so much more.

RELATED LINKS:

The Dating Accelerator Program

Starting From Zero

How To Take Dating to the Next Level

5 Simple Ways to Improve Your Social Skills

Maintaining Positive Changes in Your Life

How To Improve Your Willpower

Transcript available here

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#141 — How To Get Your Ex Back... The RIGHT Way

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Wed, 29 Apr 2020 05:00:00 +0000

Last time, we talked about the recent trend of folks reaching out to their exes, why it's happening so frequently and why it can be comforting to try to rekindle an old relationship.

But it's far too easy to fall back to old patterns and old routines with your ex, which means you're going to make the same old mistakes that lead to new pain.

Today, I'm going to teach you the RIGHT way to get your ex back.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

Why the most popular ways to get your ex back DON'T WORK
What you need to do before you try to reconnect with your ex
How to reach out to an ex without feeling forced, fake or manipulative
What to say to make your ex want to take you back
Why so many relationships fall apart for the second time... and how to avoid it

...and so much more.

RELATED LINKS:

How To Deal With Your Ex

Why You Will Never Get Closure

How To Stay Friends After The Break-Up

Ask Dr. NerdLove: We Were On A Break

The 5 Things You Need To Get Over Your Breakup

When You SHOULDN'T Get Back With Your Ex (And When You Should)

Transcript available here

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Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

#140 — Should You Get Back Together With Your Ex?

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 23 Apr 2020 05:00:00 +0000

With the stress and the chaos of the COVID-19 pandemic, more and more people are reaching out to their exes for comfort, for connection and something more.

But is it ever a good idea to get back with your ex? If you're thinking of trying to get your ex back — or reaching out to them again — then you need to be able to answer these 5 questions first.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

Why we look to our past relationships when times are hard
When an old relationship is better left in the past... and when it's worth trying again
Why it's so hard to make a relationship with your ex work a second time
How to avoid repeating old mistakes and reliving your old break-up
Why your ex might be right for you NOW

... and so much more.

RELATED LINKS:

How To Deal With Your Ex

Why You Will Never Get Closure

How To Stay Friends After The Break-Up

Ask Dr. NerdLove: We Were On A Break

The 5 Things You Need To Get Over Your Breakup

Transcript available here

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

#139 — How To Help Your Relationship Survive the COVID-19 Quarantine

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Wed, 15 Apr 2020 05:00:00 +0000

Self-isolation can be a trial for even the happiest lovers. Couples under quarantine are starting to feel the strain on their relationship. Relationships are rarely tested the way that they're being tested now, and many people are discovering their relationship isn't as happy or as strong as they they thought. In some parts of the world, divorce rates are starting to skyrocket as soon as quarantine orders have been lifted.

Don't let that happen to YOUR relationship. In this free workshop, I'll teach you what it takes to keep your relationship happy, healthy, safe and strong, so that your relationship can survive the COVID-19 crisis.

Book a private coaching session with Dr. NerdLove
Sign up for The Dating Accelerator Program

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

#138 — Love, Sex and Dating During Quarantine

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Wed, 08 Apr 2020 05:00:00 +0000

The COVID-19 pandemic doesn't mean that your love life has to be put on hold. In fact, relationships are more important than ever. People are still meeting, dating and even falling in love during social distancing. The coronavirus pandemic has forced us to think about dating in new and different ways.

In this replay of the live workshop, Dr. NerdLove will talk about how dating has changed, how we can change with it and how the current crisis has the potential to make us more desirable dates, better lovers and incredible partners.

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

#137 — How To Have A Great Social Life During COVID-19

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Wed, 01 Apr 2020 04:30:00 +0000

Loneliness is one of the unspoken side-effects of sheltering in place. And yet, we need our social connections more than ever. How can you build and maintain a social life when social distancing is the rule?

In my latest live, free seminar, I talk about how to build and maintain those important social connections, meet new people and strengthen the friendships you already have.

Want to take part? The next seminar is on 4/7 at 3 PM CST. Join me at facebook.com/DrNerdLove and join NerdLove Academy at facebook.com/groups/DrNerdLove

DOCTOR'S NOTE: So since I did this over Facebook Live, there's a little funkiness with the audio. I've done my best to clean it up but some of it is baked into the episode itself. Sorry 'bout that, we're seeing what can be done for next time.

▶︎ SIGN UP FOR THE DATING ACCELERATOR PROGRAM: https://nerdloveacademy.com/the-dating-accelerator-program-beta

▶︎ 1 ON 1 COACHING: https://www.doctornerdlove.com/private-coaching/

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes, Stitcher and on YouTube.

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#136 — DR NERDLOVE LIVE: Managing Your Emotional Health During COVID-19

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Fri, 27 Mar 2020 16:36:33 +0000

How do you manage anxiety in the middle of a pandemic? How is living under quarantine affecting you? In my first LIVE teleseminar, I talk about how to manage stress and maintain your emotional health during the COVID-19 pandemic.

Want to take part? The next seminar is on 3/31 at 3 PM CST. Join me at the Dr. NerdLove Facebook Page and be sure to join the NerdLove Academy group!

Ask Dr. NerdLove: How To Make A Long Distance Relationship Work

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Wed, 18 Mar 2020 06:30:00 +0000

I'm answering your most important dating questions! If you have a question about love, sex or dating, then be sure to leave a comment. Maybe the next question I answer will be yours!

This week: he and his girlfriend have been stuck in a long-distance relationship because of the COVID-19 pandemic. How can they keep their relationship alive while they're apart?

Book a private coaching session with Dr. NerdLove

Virtual Museum Tours

Virtual National Park Tours

Free Metropolitan Opera Live Streams

15 Broadway Musicals and Plays You Can Watch At Home

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#135 — The 5 Things You Need To Get Over A Breakup

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Wed, 11 Mar 2020 06:30:00 +0000

The reason why you have such a hard time getting over your ex is because most folks have the wrong idea about breakups. The pain of a break-up is equal parts mental and physical. When you're struggling with how to get over your breakup, you're almost never handling BOTH halves of the equation. Getting over your ex quickly and successfully requires that you address both sides of the breakup.

So today I want to give you the 5 things you MUST do in order to get over your breakup and move forward.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

How focusing on the wrong parts of a breakup only prolongs the pain and the heartbreak
Why it's important to let yourself feel the pain and frustration of breaking up with someone
How breaking up changes who you are
Why staying in contact with your ex is a mistake
The secret to getting over the loss of your relationship... quickly

... and so much more.

RELATED LINKS:

How To Survive Being Dumped — https://www.doctornerdlove.com/survive-being-dumped/

The (Positive) Value of Anger — https://www.doctornerdlove.com/positive-value-anger/

This Is Why You Can't Get Over Her — https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aevlnBwpEWw

"Cutoff Culture" And The Myth of Closure — https://www.doctornerdlove.com/cutoff-culture-and-the-myth-of-closure/

How To Protect Yourself From A Broken Heart — https://www.doctornerdlove.com/protect-yourself-from-a-broken-heart/

Transcript available at doctornerdlove.com

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Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

What Letterkenny Can Teach Us About Positive Masculinity

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Wed, 04 Mar 2020 06:30:00 +0000

I'm answering your most important dating questions! If you have a question about love, sex or dating, then be sure to leave a comment. Maybe the next question I answer will be yours!

This week: With all the talk about toxic masculinity, what does POSITIVE masculinity look like? Here's what we can learn about being better men from the hicks, jocks and skids of Letterkenny.

What Does Positive Masculinity Look Like?

Book a private coaching session with Dr. NerdLove

Listen Here
Download Here

Transcript available at doctornerdlove.com

#133 — You Are Your Own Worst Enemy

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Wed, 26 Feb 2020 06:00:00 +0000

The reason why so many people struggle with dating isn't because of their looks, their height, their genes or their hairline. It's because they are caught in a cycle of bad habits and practices that destroy your confidence and sabotages your ability to improve.

Here's how you can break out of this negative cycle and build the habits that will improve your willpower, your self-esteem and help you find the dating success you deserve.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

How self-limiting beliefs cause you to fail before you've even begun
Why negativity is so powerful and seductive
How the training secrets of US Navy SEALS can improve your social life
Why dreaming about a better life keeps you from achieving your goals
How Brad Pitt and George Clooney developed their famous charisma

...and so much more

Getting Out of Your Own Way

Starting From Zero

Build Your Emotional Resilience

You're Ok, I Promise

Transcript available at doctornerdlove.com

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Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

ASK DR. NERDLOVE: How Do You Handle Being "Just Friends"?

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Wed, 19 Feb 2020 07:00:00 +0000

I'm answering your most important dating questions! If you have a question about love, sex or dating, then be sure to leave a comment. Maybe the next question I answer will be yours!

This week: Everyone's heard the "let's just be friends" speech from someone they've been attracted to. But how do you make a friendship work with someone you're attracted to? How do you keep sex from getting in the way of your friendship?

Book a private coaching session with Dr. NerdLove

The Secret to Being "Just Friends"

Why "Men and Women Can Never Be Friends" is BULLSH*T

Transcript available at doctornderdlove.com

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Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

#133 - What Makes a Man Sexy To Women?

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Wed, 12 Feb 2020 11:00:00 +0000

Do you know what women find sexy in a man? Not attractive, not aesthetically pleasing but what makes a woman want to peel a man's clothing off with her teeth.

A lot of guys… don't.

In fact, a lot of guys have the absolute WRONG ideas about what turns women on. If you want to be sexier than other guys, then you should know what draws a woman to a guy... and why she says YES to sleeping with one guy and no to the rest.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

What men DON'T understand about desire and arousal in women
Why physical looks aren't the same thing as being sexy
What your presentation says about your desirability
Why women don't actually LIKE "alpha males"
What all the great seducers have in common

...and so much more.

RELATED LINKS:

How To Be Sexier

Why Women Say Yes To Sex

The Science of Nice Guys

The Truth About Casual Sex (And How To Get It) -

The Secret to Getting Laid (Without Losing Your Soul)

Transcript available at doctornerdlove.com

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

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Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

ASK DR. NERDLOVE: How Can You Learn To Love Being Single?

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Wed, 05 Feb 2020 10:00:00 +0000

I'm answering your most important dating questions! If you have a question about love, sex or dating, then be sure to leave a comment. Maybe the next question I answer will be yours!

This week: Valentine's Day is coming, and it's stressing people out. How can you learn to be happy when you're single, especially when it seems like the universe is determined to remind you that everyone else is coupled up and you're not?

Book A Private Coaching Session With Dr. NerdLove

The Secret to Being Successful With Women

How To Get Over Your Fear Of Rejection

How To Survive Valentine's Day (When You're Single)

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

#132 — The Secret to Being Successful With Women

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Wed, 29 Jan 2020 05:00:00 +0000

Here's something nobody will tell you about being successful with women: nobody is "naturally" good with women. Nobody is born with an instinctual ability to get dates. Everyone — people who seem to be naturally gifted and people who learned later in life — all developed their skills the same way.

That's why all the people who are successful with women have the same things in common. If you want to learn how to have the love life you deserve, then you want to master the four key components to developing the skill to meet, connect with and date amazing women.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

Why "naturals" don't really exist
How people learned the right — and wrong — lessons about how to be good with women
Why confidence is a vital part of success with women — but not for the reasons you'd expect
Why most people fail when they try to get better at dating
What makes the difference between someone who succeeds at dating, and someone who will never improve

...and so much more.

RELATED LINKS:

Become Someone Worth Dating - https://www.doctornerdlove.com/become-someone-worth-dating/

Level Up: Face Your Dating Fears - https://www.doctornerdlove.com/facing-your-dating-fears/

Developing An Abundance Mentality - https://www.doctornerdlove.com/leveling-up-abundance-mentality/

Your Attitude Controls Your Dating Success — https://www.doctornerdlove.com/your-attitude-controls-your-dating-success/

How to Use Humor in Your Flirting — https://www.doctornerdlove.com/use-humor-flirting/

Transcript available at doctornerdlove.com

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

ASK DR. NERDLOVE: How Do You Keep The Spark In Your Relationship?

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Wed, 22 Jan 2020 05:00:00 +0000

I'm answering your most important dating questions! If you have a question about love, sex or dating, then be sure to leave a comment. Maybe the next question I answer will be yours!

This week: How do you keep your relationship from fading into boredom? What's the secret to keeping the spark making your long-term relationship feel as fresh and hot and alive as when you first met?

Book A Private Coaching Session With Dr. NerdLove

Transcript available at doctornerdlove.com

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

#131 - How To Flirt With Women on Social Media

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Wed, 15 Jan 2020 08:00:00 +0000

We live more and more of our lives online, and that means that more of our relationships start there too. But most guys don't know how to flirt effectively on Facebook, Instagram or Snapchat. If you want to be the guy that women like to talk to and enjoy hearing from, not just another thirsty dude trying to slide into her DMs, then you want to follow these rules for flirting with women on social media.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

The three deadly sins of flirting on social media
How to get women to want to respond to YOU
Why what you say will affect how she sees you
How to be attractive on Facebook and Instagram
The right way to get slide into her DMs

...and so much more.

RELATED LINKS:

How To Talk To Women on Social Media

5 Secrets To Make People Like You

Make The Right First Impression

5 Common Texting Mistakes Men Make

This Is Why You're Creepy (And How To Stop It)

Transcript available at doctornerdlove.com

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

Ask Dr. NerdLove: How To Take The Perfect Tinder Photo

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Wed, 08 Jan 2020 05:30:00 +0000

I'm answering your most important dating questions! If you have a question about love, sex or dating, then be sure to leave a comment. Maybe the next question I answer will be yours!

This week: What are the best pictures for dating apps like Tinder, Hinge, Bumble and OKCupid? And how can guys look more photogenic and get more matches?

Book A Private Coaching Session With Dr. NerdLove

Transcript available at doctornerdlove.com

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

#130 — How To Find The PERFECT Girlfriend

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Wed, 01 Jan 2020 06:00:00 +0000

How do you find someone who's the RIGHT girlfriend for you... and how do you make sure that YOU are the guy that SHE'S looking for? We're going to talk about what you can do to turn 2020 into the year you meet someone who is your perfect match, and how to be the exact right man for her as well.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

Why online dating is the WRONG approach for trying to find the perfect girlfriend
How men sabotage their own success when they go out to meet women
Why even successful, socially skilled men meet the WRONG women
How to let go of the self-limiting beliefs that are keeping you from unlocking your true potential
How understanding exactly what and who you're looking for will help you meet the right woman for you.

... and so much more

RELATED LINKS:

How To Find The Right Woman For You

5 Questions You Should Ask Before Starting A Relationship

What To Look For In A Girlfriend

Is She Right For You?

Transcript available at doctornerdlove.com

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

#129 - 3 Tips For Flirting Like A Master

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Wed, 18 Dec 2019 05:30:00 +0000

DR. NERDLOVE MERCHANDISE: https://nerdloveacademy.com/shop/

One of the biggest reasons why people have a hard time flirting successfully is that they don't understand how flirting is supposed to work. But when you understand the overall philosophy of flirting, you're in a much better position to fine tune your flirting style to one that works for you and lets you adapt to whomever you're trying to flirt with.

These three unusual tips will teach you how to flirt like a master.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

What guys get wrong about how to flirt with someone they like
Why social calibration is THE most important part of flirting
How to read someone so you can flirt with them the RIGHT way
Why understanding how to set the pace makes you more attractive
Why you should think like a cat to flirt more effectively

...and so much more

ASK DR. NERDLOVE: How Do You Meet More Women?

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Wed, 11 Dec 2019 06:00:00 +0000

I'm answering your most important dating questions! If you have a question about love, sex or dating, then be sure to leave a comment. Maybe the next question I answer will be yours!

This week: How can you meet more women when you live in a small town? And how do you stop having a fear of missing out on the "perfect" relationship?

Book a Private Coaching Session With Dr. NerdLove

Transcript available at doctornerdlove.com

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

#128 — How To Get Over Your Fear of Rejection

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Wed, 04 Dec 2019 05:30:00 +0000

What would you do if you weren't afraid of being rejected? How would your life change if you could approach people you were attracted to without the fear of rejection?

Eliminating your fear of rejection could create a profound transformation in your life.

You can do this. You can learn to be absolutely fearless when it comes to meeting new people.

It's just a matter of making a very simple change in your life.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

Why a fear of rejection is about a fear of loss
How a scarcity mindset leads to being terrified of being rejected
What the most successful, rejection-proof men all have in common
How embracing the Friend Zone can make you fearless with women
How having more people in your life can destroy your fear of rejection

...and so much more.

5 Ways To Develop Your Social Skills... Quickly

Finding True Confidence

Facing Your Dating Fears

Transcript available at doctornerdlove.com

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

Ask Dr. NerdLove: Should You Tell Your Date That You're A Virgin?

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Wed, 27 Nov 2019 05:00:00 +0000

I'm answering your most important dating questions! If you have a question about love, sex or dating, then be sure to leave a comment. Maybe the next question I answer will be yours!

This week: Should you tell women that you're a virgin, or is it better to keep it a secret. And is dating your co-worker a good idea?

The Virgin's Guide to Great Sex

Book a Private Coaching Session With Dr. NerdLove

Transcript available at patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

#127 - Why Women Won't Text You Back (And What You Should Do)

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Wed, 20 Nov 2019 05:30:00 +0000

Why did she stop replying to your texts? Why won't she text you back? Is time to panic?

When when stop responding to your texts, it can feel like she doesn't like you any more. But that's not always the case. If your text conversations are drying up before you can get her out on a date, then you may be having one of these common issues.

Here's why women won't text you back… and what you can do about it.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

Why most reason why women won't text a guy back — it's not what you think.
How you end up telling women not to bother replying to your texts
What to say to keep a conversation flowing effortlessly via text
Why guys who know this one texting secret go on more dates and have more sex than the guys who don't
The text that is GUARANTEED to get a response, even from someone who hasn't responded in days or weeks.

... and so much more.

RELATED LINKS:

5 Common Texting Mistakes Men Make

How To Talk To Women On Social Media

How To Use Humor in Your Flirting

How to Be Instantly Magnetic To Women

Private Coaching With Dr. NerdLove

Transcript available at patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

Ask Dr. NerdLove: What Do You Do If She Gives You A Fake Number?

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Wed, 13 Nov 2019 14:00:00 +0000

I'm answering your most important dating questions! If you have a question about love, sex or dating, then be sure to leave a comment. Maybe next week the question I'll answer will be yours!

This week: Why do so many women have empty online dating profiles? And what do you do when a woman's given you a fake number?

Transcript available at patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Get one-on-one coaching with Dr. NerdLove: https://nerdloveacademy.com/private-coaching/

Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

#126 - Why Online Dating SUCKS (And 5 Ways To Fix It)

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Wed, 06 Nov 2019 06:00:00 +0000

Online dating sucks. Doesn't matter if it's Tinder, Bumble, OKCupid or Christian Mingle. Men get next to no matches, women get flooded with awful messages, bots, trolls and zombie profiles run rampant on most apps... it's like trying to find a diamond in a pit of sewage. Most dating apps seem designed to be frustrating to ANYONE who wants to date someone of the opposite sex.

But it doesn't have to bet that bad.

Here's why online dating is so awful... and 5 ways you can make it better.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

What science has discovered about how men and women use Tinder
Why men match with women less than .6% of the time
How to use dating app algorithms to your advantage
Why you're using the WRONG dating app
How The Cat Theory of Online Dating can improve your matches
The biggest sin of online dating

... and so much more.

RELATED LINKS:

How To Master Tinder

Tune Up Your Tinder Profile

How To Get Laid (Without Being a F*ckboy)

Texting Mistakes Men Make

How To Write The Perfect Online Dating Message

Transcript available at patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

#125 - Are You Trapped In An Abusive Relationship?

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Wed, 23 Oct 2019 04:30:00 +0000

Toxic relationships can be hard to recognize. Are you being stubborn and selfish? Or is something actually wrong? Toxic people don't look like cartoon abusers, gloating about how great it is to manipulate folks.

Learning how to recognize the signs of a toxic relationship — and how to avoid them in the first place — will strengthen your relationships, improve your confidence and make you 100% happier. Learn to recognize these signs and how to drive toxic people out of your life.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

Why toxic relationships are so hard to recognize
How toxic people trade on myths about love and relationships
What red flags you should be watching
Why "no" is your shield against toxic people
How to enforce your boundaries — even when people think you're wrong

...and so much more.

RELATED LINKS:

Is Your Relationship Toxic?

What Will You Put Up With? Boundaries, Self-Esteem and Dating

Why It's So Hard To Break Up (Even When You Need To)

Dump Your Toxic Friends

Enforcing Your Boundaries

Transcript available at patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

#124 - Why Women Don't Like Nice Guys

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 10 Oct 2019 04:00:00 +0000

Why do women say they want to find a nice guy, but never seem to want to date them?

The answer is that what women are not saying is actually more important. Whenever a woman says "I wish I could find a nice guy", there's the unspoken modifier: "I wish i could find a nice guy… who actually excites me."

Here's how men can stop being so "nice", and start being amazing.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

What women REALLY mean when they talk about finding a nice guy
Why women aren't attracted to "nice" guys
Why being "nice" by itself isn't enough
Why nice guys lose respect... and how to get it back
How to develop the qualities women are REALLY looking for in men

...and so much more.

Transcript available at patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

#123 - 5 Things Men Do That Women HATE

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Wed, 25 Sep 2019 04:00:00 +0000

Are you ruining your chances of meeting incredible women before you even start? Women HATE it when the guys they meet do these 5 things.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

How guys turn women off before they even say a word
Why trying to impress women you're attracted to is the wrong move
How to demonstrate REAL value and status when you're flirting
Why you don't want to have TOO much in common
How men manage to turn a win into a loss with this ONE mistake

...and so much more.

RELATED LINKS:

5 Signs Women Want You To Approach Them

5 Secrets To Make People Like You

How To Be Charming

Make The Right First Impression

How To Tell Amazing Stories

Transcript available at patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

#122 - Conquer Your Social Anxiety and Develop Bullet-Proof Social Confidence

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 12 Sep 2019 04:00:00 +0000

Confidence isn't about being 100% sure of your inevitable success, it's simply feeling that you know how to handle the situation.  Taking away the fear of social awkwardness helps build bullet-proof social confidence.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

Why your attitude is the key to your social success
How you accidently cripple your in-person social skills
Why MeetUps, mixers and networking is better for developing your social skills than cold approaches at bars
How to block out social anxiety by avoiding the Spotlight Effect
How to make it easier for other people to approach YOU

... and so much more.

RELATED LINKS:

Stop Being Socially Awkward Pt. 1

Stop Being Socially Awkward Pt. 2

Developing an Abundance Mentality

Face Your Dating Fears

How To Get Women To Approach YOU

Transcript available at patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

#121 - The 5 Things That Make You Irresistible To Women

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Wed, 28 Aug 2019 05:30:00 +0000

What does it take to be someone that women want to date? It's not about looks, status or money. It's about understanding the secret behind why we fall in love and with whom.

Show Highlights:

Why guys focus on surface issues... and miss the most important parts of attraction
Why women will reject you BEFORE getting to know the real you
How guys turn off women long before they ever start talking to her
Why you keep meeting the WRONG women
What makes a woman decide INSTANTLY whether she will EVER sleep with somebody

...and so much more.

Related Links:

Become Someone Worth Dating

The Science of Nice Guys and Assholes

Why Women Say Yes To Sex

This Is Why Women Won't Date You

Build An Amazing Lifestyle That Attracts Women

Transcript available at patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

#120 - What REALLY Makes Men Attractive?

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Wed, 14 Aug 2019 04:00:00 +0000

Does personality matter, or are looks the only thing that's important? Why do guys have a hard time understanding what makes a man attractive to women?

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

How much your physique ACTUALLY matters to women
Why "attraction triggers" and evolutionary psychology give men all the wrong answers
How we let self-limiting beliefs sabotage our dating success
Why attraction is about more than biology
How we confuse power fantasies for sexual ones

... and so much more.

RELATED LINKS:

The Myth of What Women Want

What Matters More, Looks Or Personality?

The Subtle Things That Make Men Attractive

Do Looks Matter?

The Dr. NerdLove Facebook thread

The Dr. NerdLove Twitter thread

Transcript available at patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

#119 - What Does A Real Man Look Like?

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 01 Aug 2019 04:30:00 +0000

Men feel immense pressure to look a particular way and they're breaking themselves, physically and psychically to try to get to reach those ideals. 

As bodies are marketed to us as products and men are sold self-loathing, we have to ask: what does a REAL man look like?

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

How male celebrities are getting the body-shaming treatment from the media
Why the idea of what makes a "real" man is always in flux
How the "perfect" body has changed over time
What men get wrong about trying to achieve the perfect body
Why there's no body positivity movement for men

...and so much more.

The Fear of Being Invisible

The Myth of What Women Want

The Selling of Masculinity

What Men REALLY Need

Transcript available at patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

#118 - Dating Tips for Short Men

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 18 Jul 2019 04:00:00 +0000

When Chris Morgan had a meltdown at the Bagel Boss in Long Island, he was tapping into real frustrations short men have in dating. Here's how short guys can learn to get the girl.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

How the body shaming of Jason Momoa and the Bagel Boss meltdown are symptoms of the same problem
Why your height isn't the deal breaker you think it is
What Tom Cruise, Robert Downey Jr., Donald Glover and Bruno Mars have in common
Why women like tall men
How to seem taller than you really are

...and so much more.

RELATED LINKS:

5 Dating Tips for Short Men

Why You Should Fake It Til You Make It

Finding True Confidence

What is The "It" Factor?

Transcript available at patreon.com/DrNerdLove

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Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

#117 - How To Be Instantly Magnetic To Women

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 04 Jul 2019 04:00:00 +0000

Charisma and personal magnetism aren't about being the handsomest or most impressive person in the room. It's about knowing how to connect with people in ways that other folks can't. Understand how to build the right connections with people and amazing women won't be able to stop thinking about you... instead of someone else.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

What the story of one man's failure teaches us about personal magnetism and charisma
Why your presentation matters more than your looks
How your body language affects your connection with others
Why intensity and authenticity is so important
What most men get wrong about being cool, popular and desirable

...and so much more.

Find Your Swagger

The Value of Authenticity

5 Secrets To Being Make People Like You

Elliot Rodger and the Price of Toxic Masculinity

5 Rules For Instantly Upgrading Your Style

Transcript available at patreon.com/DrNerdLove

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Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

BONUS EPISODE: Learning the (Love) Lessons of End of Evangelion

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Fri, 28 Jun 2019 04:00:00 +0000

Now that Neon Genesis Evangelion is available on Netflix, what can we learn about love, life and loneliness from Shinji Ikari?

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

Why so many fans relate to Shinji Ikari
How the End of Evangelion and "The Beast That Shouted AI at the Heart of the World" represent two paths for Shinji... and us
Why our fear keeps us from making the relationships we most need
How loneliness can turn to anger and violence
Why we're (not) alone

... and so much more

Captain America and Non-Toxic Masculinity

Why Your Life Won't Get Better (And How To Fix It)

Transcript available here

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#116 - This is Why Your Life Isn't Getting Better... and How To Fix It.

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 20 Jun 2019 04:00:00 +0000

Incels are spending tens of thousands of dollars on plastic surgery to become Chads and they're still miserable. Here's why your life isn't getting better... and how to fix it.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

Why there are no external solutions to an internal problem
How a micro-revolution can give you back control over your life
Why you're stuck in your comfort zone... and how to escape it
Why it's important to embrace The Pain Period
How to change the world around you to fix YOUR future

... and so much more.

RELATED LINKS:

5 Reasons Your Life Isn't Getting Better

How To Take Your Dating To The Next Level

Your Attitude Controls Your Dating Success

The McGurk Effect

Transcript available at patreon.com/DrNerdLove

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#115 - The Secret to Successful Flirting

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 06 Jun 2019 22:36:30 +0000

Flirting with amazing women is far less complicated or difficult than people think it is. Here's the secret.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

Why we rarely recognize flirting when we see it
The key to finding your flirting style
What makes the difference between conversation and flirting
How to make women become addicted to you
An underused secret technique for successful flirting

...and so much more

RELATED LINKS:

How To Use Humor In Your Flirting

The Subtle Things That Make Men More Attractive

The Most Attractive Aspect of a Man (Isn't Looks or Money)

Fix Your Flirting

How To Tell Amazing Stories

Transcript available at patreon.com/DrNerdLove

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#114 - The Mistake That's Costing You Dates

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 23 May 2019 04:30:00 +0000

This common belief is ruining your relationships and making it impossible to find the dating success you want.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

How one simple change in your mindset means the difference between romantic success and failure
How guys sabotage their own chances with women
What Doctor Horrible's Sing-Along Blog teach us about Nice Guys and Bad Boys
Why being wrong can help you connect with women
Why women REALLY choose the "Bad Boy" over the "Nice Guy"

...and so much more.

RELATED LINKS:

5 Simple Ways To Jumpstart Your Life

What Bad Boys Know That Nice Guys Don't

5 Secrets to Fix Your Love Life

Why Nice Guys Lose and Bad Boys Win

The Truth About "Nice Guys"

The Politics of Dr. Horrible

Transcript available at patreon.com/DrNerdLove

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Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

BONUS EPISODE: Why Are Millennials Having Less Sex?

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 16 May 2019 04:30:00 +0000

Millennials in general and Millennial men are having less sex than ever. Why? And what does this have to do with #metoo and the recent #sexstrike?

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

What the Economist gets wrong about Millennials and sex
Why #MeToo IS to blame for the "sex recession"... kind of
Why a "sex strike" is bad activism
How our attitudes towards sex affects our ability to please our partners
The REAL reason why men are having less sex

...and so much more

RELATED LINKS:

F*ck Like A Gentleman

The Unbelievable Secret to Getting More Sex

Can Consent Be Sexy?

Did #MeToo REALLY Ruin Flirting?

Is Masturbation BAD For You?

Transcript available at patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

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#113 - The Dr. NerdLoveLine Special

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 09 May 2019 04:00:00 +0000

You've been waiting patiently, and it's finally here! This week, the Doc - and special guest host Crystal Donovan - take your questions from the NerdLove Hotline and dispense wit, wisdom, dating advice and digressions into side topics.

Loved this episode? Have a dating question you'd like to hear answered on here? Call your question in to 512-522-6513 and leave a voice mail!

Show Highlights:

How do you talk about being an older virgin? What about when your friends want to talk about sex and you feel anxious?
How do you approach women during the day on a college campus?
What's the best way to flirt when you're worried about running out of things to day?
How do you approach an introverted guy?
How can you manage approach anxiety?
The time the Doc screwed up so badly the club closed down

... and so much more.

Related Links:

The "Problem" With Male Virginity

How To Approach Women During the Day

Overcome Your Fear of Rejection

How To Have The Awkward Conversation

Finding Strength Through Vulnerability

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

Listen Here
Download Here
Transcripts available at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

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#112 - Overcome Your Self-Limiting Beliefs

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 25 Apr 2019 04:00:00 +0000

Almost every man who struggles with dating, is holding on to these self-limiting beliefs: beliefs and assumptions about yourself and the world that hold you back from achieving your true potential. It's time to break free from the lies we tell ourselves and discover what we're truly capable of.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

How to understand what self-limiting beliefs really are
How to recognize our own self-limiting beliefs
Why our beliefs are a self-fulfilling prophecy
What it takes to break free from the cycle
Why compassion is the most important trait for self-improvement

RELATED LINKS:

Transcripts available at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

#111 - This Is Why Women Won't Date You (And How To Fix It)

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 11 Apr 2019 04:00:00 +0000

Young men are having less sex than ever. But what's more important is how you respond to that information. Here's what's ruining your chances with women.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

▶︎ How "why are men having less sex" is the wrong question

▶︎ The #1 reason why men ruin their chances with women

▶︎ How your attitude affects your love life

▶︎ The problem with "women are too picky"

▶︎ What a toxic waste monster can teach you about attraction

RELATED LINKS:

▶︎ This Is Why You Fail With Women

▶︎ The Trouble With Incels

▶︎ Which Matters More, Looks Or Personality?

▶︎ A Man's Guide To Being Happy About Being Single

▶︎ Become Someone Worth Dating

Transcript available at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

#110 - The Truth About Women and Casual Sex

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Fri, 29 Mar 2019 20:16:37 +0000

Why aren't more women interested in casual sex? What can guys do to find women who're interested in a no-strings hook-up? It's time to talk about the TRUTH about women, casual sex and how to find it...

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

▶︎ Why women prefer relationships to hook-ups and casual partners
▶︎ How the orgasm gap affects our relationships
▶︎ Why being The Cool Girl works against women AND men
▶︎ Why "casual" sex is BAD sex
▶︎ What men can do to find more casual, no strings hook-ups

...and so much more

▶︎ 5 Rules For Better Hook-Ups

▶︎ What Women Wish Men Knew About Good Sex

▶︎ Who REALLY Has The Power In Dating?

▶︎ Stop Calling It 'Casual Sex'

Transcripts available at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

#109 - This Is The Worst Dating Advice In The World (And You Need To Follow It)

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 14 Mar 2019 04:00:00 +0000

"Just be yourself" is some of the worst advice that you can give someone who wants to get better at dating. It's also the most important. So here's how to quit being yourself and learn how to become your BEST self.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

▶︎ Why "just be yourself" is useless advice
▶︎ What we REALLY mean when we say "just be yourself"
▶︎ How you can learn to change who you are
▶︎ Why most people fail at changing themselves
▶︎ Why you should fake it 'til you make it

...and so much more.

RELATED LINKS:

▶︎ What's Wrong With "Just Be Yourself"

▶︎ The 5 Things You Need To Fix Your Life
|
▶︎ How To Reinvent Yourself

▶︎ The Secret to Maintaining Positive Changes

▶︎ 5 Types of Dating Advice People Need To Stop Giving

Transcripts available at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

#108 - The Virgin's Guide To Great Sex

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 28 Feb 2019 05:30:00 +0000

Many virgin men-- especially older virgins -- believe that no woman's going to want to sleep with a guy who has no experience… but they can't they get that experience without having sex.

So let's ruin any chance of this episode being monetized and talk about what anyone — even a virgin — can do that will make them an amazing lover.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

What women REALLY think of male virgins
Why understanding YOUR needs can help you fulfill HERS
The one thing men DON'T do (but they SHOULD) before their first time
Why you need to use your tongue (but not like that)
How to avoid being a "one minute man" in bed

... and so much more.

RELATED LINKS:

Sex For Beginners

Busting The Fear of Virginity

Be The Greatest Lover She's Ever Known

F*ck Like A Gentleman (pt.1)

The Virginity Paradox

Transcripts available at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

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Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

#107 - Who REALLY Holds The Power In Dating?

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 14 Feb 2019 05:00:00 +0000

The power dynamics of dating directly affect your dating success. But who REALLY holds the power when it comes to dating? Why do so many people get the power dynamic of dating wrong and what's the REAL power when it comes to love, sex and romance?

Show Highlights

How many of the "rules" about dating are self-limiting beliefs in disguise
What we're REALLY talking about when we ask who has the power in dating
Why women DON'T have it easier than men... and how that helps YOU
How to control the interaction
How understanding the power dynamics of an approach can bring you greater dating success.

Related Links:

▶︎ The Economics of Sex
▶︎ Why Do Women Have All The Advantages In Dating?
▶︎ Why Women Don't Approach
▶︎ How To Get Women To Approach You
▶︎ Yes, It's STILL Creepy When Brad Pitt Does It

Transcripts available at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

#106 - Did #MeToo RUIN Flirting?

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 31 Jan 2019 06:00:00 +0000

Did the #MeToo movement change flirting forever? Can men no longer approach women? What makes the difference between flirting and harassment in this day and age?

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

The two types of complaints about #MeToo
The goal behind the meme that men can't flirt anymore
How men are getting the point of #MeToo wrong
The MOST important part of flirting
How to avoid being yet another creeper

RELATED LINKS:

Transcripts available at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

#105 - Is Masculinity A Mental Illness?

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 17 Jan 2019 06:00:00 +0000

Don't forget: I'm taking your questions for the NerdLoveLine special! Call (512) 522-6513 and leave a voicemail with your question!

The American Psychological Association updated it's guidelines for the treatment of boys and men to say that toxic masculine ideologies are bad for men.

Does this mean that masculinity is now a mental illness? Or is this an acknowledgement of the difficulties that men and boys face in modern society?

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

How being a man leads to unique mental and physical health issues
Why men have a difficult time receiving effective mental health care
What the new APA guidelines say... and what they DON'T say about men
How understanding toxic masculine ideas affects men and boys alike
How MRAs hurt the men they supposedly want to help

... and so much more.

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

#104 - How To Keep Going (Even When It Feels Pointless)

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 03 Jan 2019 06:30:00 +0000

Don't forget: I'm taking your questions for the NerdLoveLine special! Call (512) 522-6513 and leave a voicemail with your question!

Tell me if this has ever happened to you: you've started off trying to make some major change your life. You want to get better at dating, be more social, learn how to approach women, flirt a bit more... but once you've gotten started, nothing seems to be improving. Maybe you've made some minor progress, but the major changes, those big, life-changing moments, just aren't happening.

While any journey is easy at the start, when the going gets rough, most don't don't keep going. Here are six tips on how to stay motivated, to find the strength to get up and keep moving forward... even when it feels like there's no point.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

Why New Years Resolutions are mostly useless
Why most people fail to make lasting, positive changes in their lives
Why expecting trouble makes it easier to make changes
How you are your own worst enemy
Why journaling can help keep you on track

... and so much more.

RELATED LINKS:

5 Steps To Having An Amazing New Year

5 Ways To Jumpstart Your Life

The 5 Things You Need To Fix Your Life

How To Change Your Life (And Make It Stick)

How To Avoid Self-Sabotage

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

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#103 - Offset, Cardi B. and The Wrong Way To Win Back Your Ex

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 20 Dec 2018 06:00:00 +0000

There are the right ways of getting back with your ex. And then there are the wrong ways.

And then there's what Offset did to Cardi B., which is one of the most astoundingly stupid ways of trying to get your ex back.

Here's why those "grand romantic gestures" aren't romantic at all.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS

Why it's so hard to let go of an ex
Why "Grand Romantic Gestures" are actually creepy
How public proposals backfire
What Offset's "apology" says about him
Why grand gestures are the WRONG way to win someone back

...and so much more.

RELATED LINKS:

The Wrong Way To Get Your Ex Back

The Trouble With Romance (According to The Movies)

The Problem With Nice Guys

5 Signs Your Relationship Is Over

Why It's So Hard To Leave (Even When You Need To)

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

#102 - Is Masturbation Bad For You? Understanding The NoFap Movement

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 06 Dec 2018 06:00:00 +0000

To fap or not to fap... that is the question. Are there health benefits to giving up masturbation? Is porn addiction a real thing?
And just what is the NoFap movement, anyway?

It's time talk about sex with someone you love… yourself.

Show Highlights:

Why the "dangers" of masturbation haven't changed in hundreds of years 
The connection between testosterone and masturbation
Why NoFap gives "super powers"
Why stigmatizing masturbation can be dangerous
Why the real problem is shame, not masturbation

…and so much more.

Important News:

I'm taking answering your questions on the air! Call in with your dating questions at (512) 522-6513 and leave a voice mail or you can record it send the audio file to doc@doctornerdlove.com and put "For YouTube" in the subject.

The "Problem" With Male Virginity -

Did Porn Ruin Our Sex Life?

Porn and The Real World

What We Get Wrong About Sex

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

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Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

#101 - This is Why You Can't Get Over Her

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 29 Nov 2018 05:30:00 +0000

Friends, do you suffer from uncontrollable longing for someone who barely knows you're alive? Are you unable to get over that break up, even after months or years? Do you have the sinking feeling that nobody in the world could be as right for you or mean as much as she does? Are you afraid that this was your last chance for true love?

Then you may suffer from a disease known as Oneitis. Symptoms include heart palpitations, hopelessness, anxiety, terminal loneliness, embarrassing Spotify playlists, failed romantic relationships and a tendency to seek out pornstars that look like your ex. But there is hope! Stay tuned for a special offer that's guaranteed to cure your oneitis… Today!

Show Highlights:

Why it's so hard to get over an ex
What we get wrong about Oneitis
How to understand why you can't get over her
Why you need to practice some radical forgiveness
How learning to get over your ex can make your relationships better

... and so much more.

Related Links:

Eliminating Neediness

How To Develop An Abundance Mentality

Do You Suffer From Oneitis

How To Get Over Her

Getting Over Your Fear of Rejection

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

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#100 - Is She Flirting Or Just Being Friendly?

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 22 Nov 2018 06:00:00 +0000

How do you tell the difference between when someone's flirting with you and just being polite? And why are we so bad at telling the two apart in the first place?

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

How men and women both misjudge flirting behavior in others
Why "Straight Dude Thinking" gets in the way of flirting success
Why we mistake politeness and friendliness for interest
How to recognize the signs that someone is flirting with you
The number one key to recognizing that someone is interested... and not just being friendly.

RELATED LINKS:

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

#99 - Let's Talk About Toxic Femininity

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 15 Nov 2018 06:00:00 +0000

One of the subjects I come back to fairly often is the idea of toxic masculinity.

It's something that I personally feel is important to talk about because of how much it directly affects men and makes our lives that much harder and that much worse.

However, whenever we talk about masculinity in any form, there is such a regular response from people, in the comments and on twitter and elsewhere, that you can practically set your watch by it: "when are you going to talk about toxic femininity?"

And you know what? Fine. Buckle up folks, 'cuz we're doing this.

Show Highlights:

Why nobody can agree on a definition of "toxic femininity"
What we don't understand about toxic masculinity... and how that affects how we see femininity
Who gets to define what is or isn't toxic behavior
What are the differences between "toxic" forms of manhood vs. womenhood
What is the source of toxic femininity

...and so much more.

Related Links:

The Selling of Masculinity

What is Toxic Masculinity?

How Men Make Women Feel Unsafe

Why Is It So Hard To Be A Good Man

Nerd Role Models: Captain America and Non-Toxic Masculinity

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

#98 - How To Build A Lifestyle That Attracts Amazing Women

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 08 Nov 2018 06:00:00 +0000

When we talk about being more attractive to women, we tend to focus on the surface. We talk about how to dress, what to say, how to act. But that's the polish, the sizzle, not the substance. It may get people's attention, but without any substance to back it up, it won't keep it.

Your lifestyle is what makes you more interesting and more desirable to women.

When you have built the right lifestyle, it will bring women into your life without effort.

Show Highlights:

Why your looks, your job, your bank account or your style isn't what attracts women
What we get wrong about attractive lifestyles
Why most men live empty, boring lives
How authenticity attracts more attention than "cool"
How living an attractive lifestyle brings the right women into your life

...and so much more.

No More Magic Feathers: The Secret to Real Self Improvement

Developing Your Lifestyle

Five Simple Ways To Jumpstart Your Life

How To Meet Women, Effortlessly

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

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Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

#97 - How To Develop a Mindset For Relationship Success

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 01 Nov 2018 05:00:00 +0000

Success, whether in life or in relationships, doesn't come from having the perfect plan or never making a mistake. It comes
a mindset that strips away the things that hold you back and keeps you focused on what matters. You learn to avoid all of the ways you sabotage yourself and develop the emotional strength it takes to get up and win.

Whether you're looking for love or chasing your dreams, if you change your mindset, you change your life.

Show Highlights:

Why success is born out of your attitude, not your actions
How a self-limiting beliefs trap us in a cycle of failure
Why we let the things we can't control ruin our chances for success
Why an abundance mindset makes it easier to succeed in relationships
How the way we choose to see the world can change our future

... and so much more.

Developing an Abundance Mentality

Redefining Failure

Overcome Your Fear of Rejection

How To Build A Mindset for Success

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

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Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

#96 - This Is Why You Fail

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 25 Oct 2018 05:00:00 +0000

How often has the frustration of being single gotten to you?

How many times have you asked yourself: why aren't you going to get any better? Why do other people find love and you don't? Why aren't you able to build the life that you want to live and be the man you dream about being?

It's time to talk about the reason why so many guys won't find a girlfriend or lover... and what you can do to avoid their mistake.

Show Highlights:

What is the Negativity Bias and why does it ruin your social success?
Why so many men choose pain over love
Why we believe that truth has to hurt
How men's anxieities cause them to self-destruct
How to build the strength you need to keep going

...and so much more.

Related Links:

What Is Toxic Masculinity? - http://www.doctornerdlove.com/what-is-toxic-masculinity/

Build Your Emotional Resilience - http://www.doctornerdlove.com/build-emotional-resilience/

Your Attitude Controls Your Dating Success - http://www.doctornerdlove.com/your-attitude-controls-your-dating-success/

The Only Thing In The Way of Social Success - http://www.doctornerdlove.com/only-thing-in-way-success/

Redefining Failure - http://www.doctornerdlove.com/redefining-failure/

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#95 - What Men Get Wrong About Women

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 18 Oct 2018 05:00:00 +0000

If you're looking for advice on dating women, then you're going to find many, many self-proclaimed experts in the female mind.

The problem is that most of them are almost entirely wrong. Worse, they set men up for failure by insisting on an outlook that puts men and women in conflict.

It's time to talk about WHY men often have a hard time understanding and relating to women... and why it's so important, if you want to be socially successful.

Show Highlights:

Why so much "advice" about women causes conflict instead of helping to resolve it
How we convince ourselves that we know more than we actually do
How the "Men Are From Mars/ Women Are From Venus" dichotomy gets it wrong
The REAL reason men and women don't understand each other
What the most successful lovers have in common

...and so much more.

Related Links:

The Myth of What Women Want

5 Simple Ways to Jumpstart Your Life

Detoxifying Masculinity

Understanding The Dangers of Dating

How To Understand Women

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#94 - How To Be A Better Man

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 11 Oct 2018 04:00:00 +0000

Over the last month, the nation has had one of many conversations about sexual assault and the affect it has on survivors. And as more women speak up, sharing their stories, sharing their pain and their rage, there are guys — guys who don't want to be part of the problem, who want to be good men — who want to know what they can do to make things better.

And the answer is simple: men need to step up. We need to learn to be the men we were always meant to be and the men the world needs right now. We need to learn how to be better.

Show Highlights:

Why men need to do the work to make the world better
How the system we live in keeps men from seeing the realities women live with
Why it's important to simply listen to women
What #believewomen actually means
Why we need to get comfortable with being uncomfortable

...and so much more

Related Links:

Nerds and Male Privilege

What Does It Take To Be A Better Man?

Reclaiming Manhood: Detoxifying Toxic Masculinity

Why It's So Hard To Be A Good Man

Captain America and Non-Toxic Masculinity

Straight White Male: The Lowest Difficulty Setting There Is

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#93 - Flirting Mistakes That Women Hate

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Wed, 12 Sep 2018 06:00:08 +0000

There's a lot of bad advice out there when it comes to flirting. Advice that not only does it not work, but is actually a masterclass in how to creep women out and occasionally piss them off.

Meeting women can be hard enough without making flirting mistakes that're going to backfire, messily and all over the place. The last thing you want to do is ruin your chances with a woman by making the wrong move. Women want to like you and for you to like them too. So don't screw it up. Learn how to avoid these common flirting mistakes that men make and women HATE.

Show Highlights:

Why your attitude controls your dating success
How flirting the wrong way just wastes your time
The common mindset that drives women away
How many guys ruin the attraction they've built with women
Why status isn't the attraction switch guys think it is

and so much more...

The Mistakes Men Make WHen Approaching Women

Privilege, Entitlement and Dating

How To Not Being Creepy

The Mistakes Men Make That Cost Them Dates

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#92 - How To Upgrade Your Style, Instantly

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 06 Sep 2018 04:30:00 +0000

Learning how to dress well is one of the quickest and easiest ways to be more attractive. When you start dressing up sharp, you look amazing... and most people don't. But it takes very little to stand out and be sharpest dressed, most stylish guy in the room… and without spending a small fortune in the process.

You just have to know the rules.

Show Highlights:

The one style rule that matters above all others
The celebrity secret to looking incredible all the time
How clothes are SUPPOSED to fit
The secret to upgrading your wardrobe for cheap
How to use Hollywood's secrets to improve your style

and so much more...

Related Links:

Discover Your Style

5 (Cheap) Ways To Look Better

How To Stand Out (The Right Way)

Find Your Archetype

The Subtle Things That Make Men More Attractive

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#91 - How To Plan The Perfect First Date

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 30 Aug 2018 04:30:00 +0000

How many times have you had a first date that you thought was amazing... but never lead to a second date?

First dates can be tricky and frustrating. A lot of guys are good at getting a first date, but can never turn it into a second or third date. No matter what they seem to do, they're left with a series of first dates to nowhere with nothing to show for it. And the problem is that most first dates are just bad. If you want to get that second date, then you need to understand just what makes one first date boring and another date incredible.

Show Highlights:

What guys get wrong about first dates
Why women don't want to see you again
What to talk about on a first date
Why traditional first date ideas are bad
How to plan a memorable and unique first date

... and so much more.

Related Links:

Make The Right First Impression

Solve Your Dating Emergencies

How To Survive a Bad Date

Get That Second Date (By Acing The First)

How To Be An Amazing Kisser

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#90 - How To Be More Attractive... Instantly!

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 23 Aug 2018 04:30:00 +0000

When we talk about being attractive, we tend to think of it in terms of being physically good looking. But there's a difference between being good looking and being attractive. People can be stunningly beautiful but have all the sex appeal of a block of wood. Meanwhile there can be people who are ugly as sin and yet have an almost mystical level of sex-appeal.

Being attractive isn't about whether you have abs like whoah or cheekbones that you could cut cheese with. It's not about your skull or your jawline; it's about the way you present yourself and the effort you put in. Attractiveness is about the holistic person and the little changes that make you go from "nice" to "...niiiiiice".

Show Highlights:

Why physical looks are only a small part of attraction
The simplest and quickest way to change how you look
One simple tip for an amazing haircut
The number one way men kill attraction
Why most men will never actually improve

...and so much more

Which Matters More, Looks or Personality?

Discover Your Style

5 Things Men Do That Make Them Less Attractive

5 Ways To Look Better (Without Going Broke)

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#89 - How To Improve Your Social Skills... Quickly

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 16 Aug 2018 04:30:00 +0000

One of the mistakes a lot of people make is that they assume that social success is a binary. Either you're good with girls or you aren't and there's nothing you can do about it. But the good news is: that's not true.

Dating, being more successful with women, even just being more socially fluent is a skill that you can practice, and if you can practice it, you CAN get better at it. And you can learn to improve those skills quickly by breaking things down and practicing those skills individually… and integrating that practice into your day to day life.

Show Highlights:

How to make practicing social skills faster and more efficient
How to master making strong eye-contact
The secret to learning better non-verbal communication
Why practicing awareness leads to stronger social skills
The secret to beating approach anxiety

...and so much more.

Related Links:

How To Level Up Your Dating

Starting From Zero

How To Make Small Talk (For People Who Hate Small Talk)

5 Simple Ways To Strengthen Your Social Skills

5 Tips To Improve Your Communication Skills\

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#88 - Why Nice Guys Lose (And Bad Boys Win)

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 09 Aug 2018 04:30:00 +0000

Doctor's Note: There's a recurring audio issue with this week's episode that I wasn't able to fully eliminate. I've edited around it as best as I could but it'll crop up a couple times. Sorry about that.

The idea that women like "bad boys" or "assholes", and that there a bright line between guys who get dates — the assholes — and guys who don't — the "nice guys" gets kicked around in dating circles as though it were gospel truth. It's one that feels true, especially if you're someone who thinks they fall into the nice guy side of the equation. But the reality is very different.

The issue isn't that bad boys are desirable and nice guys are unattractive because science or evolutionary psychology or anything else. It's far simpler than that. It's not about what those supposed 'bad boys' do. It's about what the nice guys… don't.

Show Highlights:

Why nice guys buy into the myth of the bad boy
How nice guys hinder their own success
The simple, easy way to transform an average joe into a hot man about town
How your attitude affects your attractiveness
The one thing "bad boys" know that nice guys don't

...and so much more

Related Links:

Being a Nice Guy Isn't Good Enough

What Bad Boys Know That Nice Guys Don't

What is The "It" Factor

The Appeal of "Bad Boys"

5 Attraction Myths... DEBUNKED

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#87 - How To Overcome Neediness

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 02 Aug 2018 04:30:00 +0000

When it comes to dating, there is one common issue that men have that will kill any chance you have to build attraction or a relationship: neediness.

Neediness and needy behavior is the Anti-Sex equation. No matter what else you have going for you in your life — you could travel the world, you could be world famous, you could be a millionaire with a mansion and a yacht — neediness will ultimately make people nope the hell out of your life, whether you're in a relationship, or just trying to start one. Neediness drives people away because it's that's a sign that someone's just not ready for a relationship.

But overcoming neediness isn't about following rules like "only text X number of times" or "only see her Y times per week"... it's about addressing the source of needy behavior.

Show Highlights:

Why women are turned off by needy behavior
How neediness is a sign of other dating deal-breakers
Why men with low self-esteem have a harder time finding lasting relationships
How fear causes needy behavior
Why most men never overcome neediness

...and so much more.

Related Links:

The Problem With Neediness

Eliminating Neediness

Avoid These Dating Deal Breakers

Better Dating Through Mind Control

Listen Here
Download Here

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#86 - How To Approach Women In Groups

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 26 Jul 2018 04:30:00 +0000

A lot of men don't know how to approach women in groups — whether they're with other women or a mixed group of men, women and more. As a result, they tend to focus on that one person… and end up coming across like a hyena trying to separate a gazelle from the herd. Fortunately, it's actually very easy to join in a groups, in a way that not only encourage them to accept you, but help you make a powerful connection almost immediately.

You just have to understand how to manage group dynamics.

Show Highlights:

What men get wrong about approaching groups of women
The common mistake that gets you rejected by groups
How men send the wrong signal when approaching women
Why talking to one person in the group is a mistake
Understand the power of the 3:2 ratio

...and so much more

Related Links:

Reading the Room (via Seanan McGuire)

The No-Fear Guide To Navigating Parties Like A Pro

5 Different Ways To Boost Your Charisma, Instantly

Popularity 101

The Art of Social Calibration

5 Secrets To Make People Like You

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#85 - Understanding The Difference Between Flirting and Harassment

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 19 Jul 2018 04:30:00 +0000

Recently Henry Cavill gave his thoughts about flirting in a post #MeToo era during an interview with GQ Australia, where he claimed to be afraid that flirting with someone might lead to his being dragged through hell because… reasons. And while he has since apologized for his insensitive remarks, they struck a chord with many people: where do you find the line between welcome flirting and sexual harassment? Does it come down to "flirting is when women like you and harassment is when they don't"? What are the rules that define what's flirting and what isn't?

Show Highlights:

Why do some men get away with flirting with women when other men get called out for it?
Why "Just Be Attractive" gets it wrong
The crucial details that make the difference between welcome flirting and unwelcome invasions of space
How to tell when someone wants you to flirt with them
Why nobody is harassing people by accident

...and so much more

Related Links:

How To Not Be The Office Creeper

Understanding The Dangers of Dating

What It Takes To Be A Better Man

Read Her Signs (Without Reading The Tea Leaves)

Sexual Harassment in Nerd Culture

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#84 - Can Silicon Valley Save Sex Ed? A Conversation With Brianna Rader

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 12 Jul 2018 05:30:00 +0000

The state of sexual education in America is appalling. If schools aren't required by law to only teach abstinence-only education, then at most we get a glorified plumbing lesson instead of what we really need to know. As a result: more and more people are turning to porn for lessons in sex and sexuality.

But what if there's a better way? If the educational system fails us - either through ignorance or design - can we take sex-ed to the people? Can we disrupt sex education and give people access to the information they need via their smartphones? This week, I talk with Juicebox app developer Brianna Rader about relationship coaching, what we get wrong about sex ed, the trouble with porn... and also what it's like to be condemned personally by the state of Tennessee.

And be sure to listen until the end; there's an exclusive offer for my fans.

Show Highlights:

Why schools are falling behind when it comes to teaching us about sex
How porn is filling in the gaps... and why that's a problem
Why we have such a hard time communicating our wants and needs with our partners
What it's like trying to fund a sex-based start-up today
How independent apps are changing the future of education

... and so much more.

Related Links:

Porn and The Real World

What We Get Wrong About Sex

What Do Your Secret Sexual Desires Say About You?

What Men SHOULD Have Learned In Sex Ed

F*ck Like A Gentleman (pt. 1)

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#83 - What Terry Crews Can Teach Us About Standing Up For Male Victims

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 05 Jul 2018 05:00:00 +0000

(Content Warning: Sexual Assault)

On June 26th, Expendables and Brooklyn 99 star Terry Crews testified before Congress in support of the Sexual Assault Survivor's Bill of Rights. As part of his advocacy for survivors of rape and sexual assault, Crews talked about his own experience of having been the victim of sexual violence. In doing so he challenged the narrative of what it means to be the survivor of sexual assault... and showed us how we fail male victims of sexual violence.

Show Highlights:

Why few men ever speak up about having been sexually assaulted
How we teach men to not trust other men
How we treat male sexual assault as a joke
Why the narrative of who can be a victim harms survivors of sexual assault
Why rape and sexual assault isn't about sex

and so much more.

Sexual Harassment and the Toxic Culture of Comics

Jonathan Martin and the Quiet Strength of Manhood

When Masculinity Fails Men

Understanding Toxic Masculinity

#82 - How To Get Women To Approach You

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 28 Jun 2018 05:30:00 +0000

Lots of guys get anxious about approaching women that they're attracted to. But what if there were a way to change that. Ever wished you were one of those men who had women coming up to them?

You can be... if you understand why women are willing to approach some men and not others. If you understand the secrets to why women do and don't make the first move, you can learn to be the guy that women notice... and they'll be eager to introduce themselves to you.

Show Highlights:

Why women don't make the first move... and what you can do about it
How most men make it impossible for women to approach them
What you can do to make sure you stand out and be the man that women want to approach
The secret signal that you can use to get women to come talk to you
The number one mistake men make that makes women decide to talk to someone else

... and so much more.

Related Links:

Fix Your Flirting

The Subtle Things Men Do That Make Them More Attractive

Discover Your Style

5 Ways To Look Better (Without Going Broke)

5 Signs Women Want You To Talk To Them

Don't forget to pre-order my new book I Got Her Number. Now What? A Geek's Guide To Texting, Snapchatting and Sliding into DMs, coming July 24, 2018

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#81 - The Texting Mistakes That Cost Men Dates

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 21 Jun 2018 05:30:00 +0000

How often has this happened to you: you've got a woman's number, but you never seem to be able to actually get a date. You may be doing great at first, but then you notice that it's taking longer and longer for her to reply and those replies are getting shorter and shorter until you get... nothing. And now you're left wondering just what happened... and why it keeps happening to you.

Texting may have been a godsend to shy, awkward guys who want to get dates, but you still have to know how to do it right. You may be used to talking with your thumbs like God intended, but that doesn't mean that your texting game is all it should be. In fact, if you're regularly getting radio silence or have a hard time turning numbers into dates, then you're probably making one of these common texting mistakes.

Show Highlights:

How texting changed the dating game... and how it made things harder
Why so many men get ghosted after they get her number
The mistake men make when trying to build attraction over text
How even the most well-meaning men can end up ruining women's interest in them through one wrong text
The number one mistake men make that costs them dates

...and so much more

Don't forget to pre-order my new book I Got Her Number. Now What? A Geek's Guide To Texting, Snapchatting and Sliding into DMs, coming July 24, 2018

Related Links:

Find Your Flirting Style

How to Use Humor In Your Flirting

How To Avoid Getting "The Fade"

The Mistake Men Make That Cost Them Dates

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#80 - How To Make New Friends (When You're Out Of College)

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 14 Jun 2018 05:00:00 +0000

Men on the whole, and white, heterosexual men in particular, tend to have fewer friends than women and the friendships they do have tend to be shallower and less fulfilling. It's really not uncommon for guys to look up and realize just how few friends they have outside of family members and romantic relationships. And by then… it feels like it's too late. After all, it's easy to make friends when you're in college. But how do you go about making friends when you're a grown man?

Show Highlights:

How men train themselves out of having close friends
Why male friendships tend to be shallower than female friendships
Why it's harder to make friends after college
The Friendship Formula: what it takes to make close friends
How to turn acquaintances into lifelong friendships

...and so much more

Related Links:

Men And the Epidemic of Loneliness

Five Secrets To Make People Like You

How To Make New Friends

Building a Closer Friendship Between Men

Finding Strength Through Vulnerability

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#79 - Men and the Epidemic of Loneliness

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 07 Jun 2018 04:00:00 +0000

Men, especially heterosexual men, tend to have very few deep, emotional connections, and of the ones they do have, very few of them are with other men. And that's actually a problem.

Men are dealing with an epidemic of loneliness and isolation and it's literally killing us. But despite the damage that loneliness can cause, men have a hard time finding and fostering emotionally close and intimate relationships. Why are male friendships so shallow and transitory and what can we do to build the relationships we need?

Show Highlights:

How loneliness is literally hurting men
Why men have a harder time building closer, stronger social ties than women
How society inadvertently teaches men to avoid close friendships with other men
Why toxic masculinity prevents men from from building the relationships we want
How the ways men try to bond actually makes it harder to actually become close with their friends

... and so much more.

Related Links

Detoxifying Toxic Masculinity

Why We All Feel So Lonely

What Men Really Need

The Surprising Need For Male Intimacy

Defining a Modern Masculinity

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#78 - 5 Tips To Unlock Powerful Self-Confidence

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 31 May 2018 20:11:02 +0000

Everyone and their dog will tell you that confidence is sexy, it's probably the oldest trope in dating advice besides "just be yourself". And, in fairness… they're right. Confidence is an important part of being attractive, and not having confidence is going to hold you back.

Of course, nobody ever tells you just how you're supposed to get that confidence. It's easy to talk about being confident when you already feel it. When you don't… well, as far as dating advice goes, "just be more confident" is about as useful as telling someone "it's easy to fly; all you have to do is throw yourself at the ground and miss!"

But what makes it even harder to develop your self-confidence is that a lot of people don't understand what confidence actually is.

This week, it's time to break down what confidence is, what it isn't and 5 tips that you can use right now to unlock powerful, unshakable self-confidence.

Show Highlights:

The mistake that people make that makes it impossible to build their own self-confidence
Why even the most accomplished people may not feel confident
What unconfident men all have in common
How you sabotage your own self-confidence
Why failure is the key to confidence

...and so much more.

Related Links:

Learn To Be More Confident

Find Your Swagger

How To Discover Your Style

Dump Your Toxic Friends

How To Avoid Self-Sabotage

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#77 - This Is What Makes You Creepy

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 24 May 2018 05:30:00 +0000

What is it that makes one person creepy and another person attractive? Why do some men set off women's Spidey-sense while other men can do the exact same things and be perfectly fine?

Guys - especially ones who aren't the most socially well-calibrated - worry a lot about being creepy by accident. They worry that being a creeper, even if it's entirely unintentional - will start be the start of a long process that begins with being called creepy and eventually leads to their dying alone in a cave because they've been kicked out of all society, everywhere. But what is it that can cause even seemingly perfectly normal behavior to make people feel uncomfortable... and how can you avoid it?

Show Highlights:

Why being creepy isn't about who's hot and who's not
How society makes it harder for women to trust their instincts
The psychology behind why certain behaviors make women uncomfortable
What behaviors trigger women's sense of danger and why
The key to avoiding being a creeper

...and so much more.

Related Links:

On The Nature of Creepiness

The Science of Being Creepy

Socially Awkward Isn't An Excuse

Yes, It's Still Creepy When Brad Pitt Does It

How To Read Body Language

Don't Be a Creeper

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#76 - The Virginity Paradox

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 17 May 2018 05:00:00 +0000

Recently, we've been talking about toxic masculinity and all of the ways that it damages men on the individual level and society on the whole. One of the enduring questions is: so what do we do about it.

Part of the way we start end the damage that toxic masculinity does and help heal some of the pain is to talk openly and honestly about some of the issues that come bundled in the toxic masculinity package. And one of the biggest issues is the topic of sex - especially how it affects men who aren't having it.

A lot of people - men and women both - feel ashamed of being virgins, and honestly, the way we treat virginity is profoundly fucked up. And it can be especially troubling for male virgins because there's a lot of cultural bullshit caught up in masculine identity and sexuality. Sex is a core component of toxic masculinity; your value and measure of a man is in how much sex you have and how often you have it. If you haven't had any… well, are you really a man at all?

It's time to talk about the shame, the stigma and the frustration that comes from being a virgin when you don't want to be.

Show Highlights:

How our brains drive our frustration with being virginity
Why toxic masculinity is behind the shame of being a male virgin
How society creates pressure to lose your virginity as soon as possible
Whether being a virgin is a turn-off to women
Why there's no such thing as "too late"

...and so much more

Related Links:

The 20, 30 and 40 Year Old Virgin

The "Problem" With Male Virginity

The Virgin's Guide To Great Sex

Sex For Beginners

How To Be An Amazing Kisser

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#75 - How Do You Fix The Problem With Incels?

homalley@doctornerdlove.com (Harris O'Malley) — Thu, 10 May 2018 06:00:00 +0000

Over the last couple of weeks, it seems as though the world has been talking about incels - people who refer to themselves as being involuntarily celibate. But while we are all bringing attention to the existence of incels, but there aren't many resources for people who want to stop being involuntarily celibate.

What is the real issue that drives otherwise good people to the incel community? How can someone who calls themselves involuntarily celibate break the cycle and escape the hate and misogyny that's inherent in the incel scene?

Show Highlights:

Why getting laid and sex workers aren't the solution to the problem with incels
How incels doom themselves to failure when they try to get better
Why sex and sexual frustration isn't the root of the problem
How the incel community deliberately makes people feel worse
The key to fixing the real problem that's driving incels

... and so much more.

Related Links:

The "Problem" With Male Virginity

Your Attitude Controls Your Dating Success