Never Lose Spirit

Celebrating My Cancerversary!

2012-02-17T08:34:00.000-06:00

It’s been months since I’ve posted on this blog. But today is a special day, so I feel inclined to write an update.

Today I celebrate my two-year CANCERVERSARY. It was February 17, 2010 that I was given the grim news, found out there was a disease called Inflammatory Breast Cancer. But since that day, the fight has been on and the news has only been good. That includes last week’s good news from my brilliant medical team at UAMS: My tumor markers came back perfect. No cancer found inside this body!

And while I continue to battle bone density issues, some leg pain and a few other inconvenient side effects, I can live with all that knowing the medicines I take are successfully fending off the brutal attack of cancer. The great thing is that Dr. Makhoul doesn't believe I HAVE to live some of these side effects - so in the next few weeks and months, he's looking to make some adjustments with my daily meds. As I tell him, I'm just a PR chick, you're the doctor. Tell me what to do and I'll do it. He's still batting one thousand!

A lot has been happening with me these past months. I’m working fulltime again and enjoying every day, every client, and every project. It feels so good to be back in my creative world, helping clients solve problems, master the power of words and design. I work with some of the greatest minds in the communications industry and my colleagues inspire me every day.

In addition to work, I keep busy with my many community projects – Philander Smith College, KIPP Delta Public Schools (I’m now a school board member!), United Methodist Foundation, Arkansas Advanced Initiative for Math & Science, and fostering abandoned dogs for Last Chance Arkansas. I’ve also joined the board of CARTI (my very trusted radiology clinic) and have been busy working with another PR colleague, Brenda Scisson, as we raise funds for a new patient services initiative at UAMS. You can read about it here. They've even named the initiative after my blog - Never Lose Spirit. How nice!

And of course, my girls continue to keep me busy and entertained. Allyson stays busy with her PR position at the Contemporary Art Museum-St. Louis. She also founded a wonderful fundraiser – Celebrate Style – that supports the breast cancer program at Barnes-Jewish Hospital. Anna-Lee is finishing semester two of her sophomore year at the University of Arkansas. She’s majoring in social work, keeps good grades, has retained her scholarship (yeah!), and enjoys college life with a repertoire of new friends. Both of them are happy and doing well - which is all a mother ever wants.

I guess I’ve been remiss about writing on this blog. But it’s only because I've been so busy living life! While I feel guilty about this at times, I stop and remind myself what this blog was really all about - KICKING CANCER'S BUTT. And since we’ve managed to make that happen, I’m living life and don’t always have the time to write. My life is so filled with LIFE!

I will make a better effort to post the occasional update, reminding those who read it that there is life after cancer. It can be a difficult journey back but once you get there it's a pretty amazing place to be!

Many thanks to my family and friends, colleagues and my church family who have helped me stay strong the past two years. I love you all. But more importantly than that, I have felt your love, and I do believe that LOVE helps us keep our fighting spirit!

Here’s to celebrating year two – with hope for many more years ahead!

Never Lose Spirit at UAMS

2011-10-05T12:30:00.000-05:00

Last night was another wonderful evening celebrating more hope for cancer patients at UAMS Rockefeller Cancer Institute.

My first contact with the Cancer Institute was in the mid-90s, when Dr. Suzanne Klimberg hired me to help Rep. Josetta Wilkins pass the Arkansas Breast Cancer Act. And after almost two-years of working on that project, I thought I knew everything there was to know about breast cancer. But in February 2010, I found out I was wrong.

Not long after my own diagnosis, I quickly figured out that the diagnosis of cancer and the aggressive treatments that follow oftentimes wreak havoc, not only on your body, but on your psychological and emotional state as well.

There’s anxiety and fear that can often transcend into depression.
Depletion of normal energy levels along with erratic sleep patterns.
Pain management issues often associated with different treatments.
Drug therapies with powerful side-effects, like Neutropenia, neuropathy, bone density loss, dehydration and more.
Major weight change and total loss of hair, which can definitely impact the body image. It’s difficult to feel physically appealing when you look less like a human, and more like a naked mole rat.
Some patients experience a change in appetite, or can no longer tolerate their usual diet after surgery or during treatment.
Difficulties at work, maybe even with family. And for parents with cancer, we worry about our children, and then worry about the worries our children have about us.
Some of us realize permanent changes to our bodies post surgery, changes that will be with us forever.
Mounting bills, health insurance disputes and tough financial issues.
Well-meaning friends who advise us about cancer-fighting foods, spices, vitamins, supplements, organic teas, and miracle elixirs found online.
But certainly the greatest challenge is our fear of dying, and quite possibly having to make peace with leaving this earth before you had planned.
And for survivors – there’s the constant worry about relapse and having to go through this all over again.

The bottom line is this: Fighting cancer is not for the faint of heart. It can be overwhelming, all encompassing. We find ourselves involved with so many physical and emotional issues that are new. And most of the time all we need is some medically sound advice; someone to answer our questions, new coping skills that will give us strength and renew our spirit of hope.

Of all the issues mentioned, the good news is this. There is a professional at my cancer center, UAMS, who can help with every one of them. But for a patient at a huge medical facility, sometimes it can be difficult to find them

The initiative launched Monday night is called Never Lose Spirit – a renewed focus on patient support services intended to address the emotional, physical and lifestyle changes associated with a cancer diagnosis. Through the sale of a beautiful glass sculpture designed by Hendrix graduate and Pine Bluff artist James Hayes, hopefully we will accomplish two very important things:

Re-package existing services found at UAMS to help patients better navigate themselves through the many services offered. UAMS is more than a multi-disciplined health care center, and all patients have the luxury of a plethora of medical and psychological resources. We just need to make sure that patients know how to find them.
Offer even more patient services that deal with the whole being. I envision this Institute soon employing patient navigators and offering classes on nutrition, meditation, relaxation, journaling and more – all of them complementary therapies that can help us maintain emotional health during the fight.

Here’s a link to the initiative, including the ability to purchase one of these lovely glass sculptures to support our efforts.

The UAMS Rockefeller Cancer Institute is a powerful force when it comes to fighting cancer. And with many thanks to the financial underwriting of this initiative by Judy Tenanbaum, Vince Insalaco, UAMS and the Rockefeller Cancer Institute will soon become known not only as the very best in terms of cancer treatment, it will become known as the very best in patient support services, as well.

With many thanks to UAMS and the Rockefeller Cancer Institute leadership team. Here’s to their vision for treating the whole patient!

A Survivor’s Update

2011-10-01T10:55:00.000-05:00

Wow, it’s been such a long time since I posted on this blog. Many friends and family have mentioned it to me, some have even been a little scolding. However, all has been well, and I’ve become re-engaged into my more normal world, meaning I just haven’t made the time for this blog. But today I have a few things to share.

First, about my health – it’s good! I continue to battle side effects from the medicines I take, but who’s complaining. I don’t have cancer. Tolerating fatigue, pesky leg bones, some vision problems and dry mouth is nothing compared to cancer treatment. And with a few adjustments to my lifestyle, I’m tolerating all of them just fine.

Second, my girls are good. In fact, I am proud to share with you my oldest daughter Allyson’s recent accomplishment in the world of breast cancer advocacy. Last year after Little Rock’s Runway for a Cause, Allyson said to me, “I can do that in St. Louis.” And she did, and has been working on this event for over a year. Already a volunteer with the Siteman Cancer Center in STL, Allyson and her sorority sister Hannah Vargon presented the idea “Celebrate Style”, a high-energy fashion show to benefit their Young Women’s Breast Cancer Program. This inaugural event, held on Friday, September 16, welcomed over 200 guests in a night of connecting fashion and philanthropy in the ultimate celebration of survivorship. Here’s a photo of three generations of “Sells women” celebrating style and cancer survivorship. But more than anything, we were absolutely celebrating Allyson and her penchant for community service. Cousin Paula even flew in from San Antonio and attended with her daughter Cousin Casey who now lives in St. Louis. It was a very successful event, a wonderful weekend for sure.

Speaking of my cousin Paula Callaway, when we returned, I received an email from her about a plea from Women’s Health magazine asking breast cancer survivors to share their story. Paula encouraged me to send mine, so I did. And guess what – my story was selected and now I’m in it. Who would have ever thought I would be in a magazine about health. But I love this photo with my girls, and honored to be in this breast cancer feature with so many other strong women who are fighting the good fight. Thanks Paula! Here’s the online link. Also take a minute to read the other stories too. They are inspiring.

And finally, this coming Monday marks the launch of a new program at my beloved UAMS, at the Rockefeller Cancer Institute. Working with the leadership team and other volunteers at the Institute, we will bring enhanced patient support services that will address the emotional, physical and lifestyle changes associated with a cancer diagnosis. Classes for patients and caregivers, in addition to consultations with nutritionists, pharmacists and social workers are part of the program in development. Fighting cancer is multi-faceted, so it’s very exciting to work with a team of cancer specialists so dedicated to the whole person. More about this come Monday or Tuesday.

I’ll close with this quote from one of my favorite women in history – Eleanor Roosevelt. Indeed what a strong woman she was, a full of character and love for mankind.

The purpose of life, after all, is to live it, to taste experience to the utmost, to reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experiences.

I’m living and loving and tasting life these days. While my body may be slower and my days shorter (due to more sleep), I’m no longer afraid. Instead, I feel blessed that I have learned much and loved more as a result of this cancer experience.

What was it that Nietzsche said? What doesn’t kill us makes us stronger? Well, I am stronger, and more grateful. Thank you friends! Love you all . . .

Blogging The Journey, or just Blogging About Life

2011-06-12T09:27:00.000-05:00

Another friend has been given a breast cancer diagnosis. She spent the better part of last week at UAMS, in conference with her new medical team. She’ll spend the next several months battling this nasty cancer – a disease that has taken the life of her mother and her sister. My friend is definitely taking this unfortunate battle very seriously.

A few nights ago we were visiting about what lies ahead in terms of treatment, side effects, timelines, logistics of care, and more. My first piece of advice to her – get your home and life as organized as possible as the next several months you will only have the energy to battle cancer. Home maintenance, yard care and deep cleaning will definitely be put on hold for a while.

We then moved to the topic of keeping family and friends informed. She’s trying to make that decision now about how to do that.

There are several options including electronic mail to a designated list. After my diagnosis, email updates seemed like the most sensible way to go – that is until I began to think about who to include on the distribution list. If email becomes the communications tool, there is the very real potential of leaving people off who really care, and including others who would rather not be bombarded with regular email updates. I quickly moved from email to social media.

There are many advantages to using a social media network:

§ It eases the burden of the patient, eliminating time-consuming phone calls and emotional conversations. With social media, one post can communicate with an unlimited number of family and friends.

§ Loved ones far away feel much more connected during the serious illness of someone they love.

§ It allows those who want to keep up with your health updates to voluntarily go to your online site. There is nothing intrusive about your blog whatsoever. Engagement is strictly voluntary.

§ Blogs and other social networks allow friends to leave a message. New research shows that verbal support from loved ones, connecting with family and friends is extremely important for those dealing with a serious illness. It lifts the spirits, relieves stress, and creates a compassionate community that brings hope and a sense of healing.

Creating my own blog was the option I chose. Being in the public relations field, it seemed only natural that I should use the same communications tool I recommend to many of my clients. There are also other online alternatives to creating a blog that make it very easy – like CaringBridge and CarePages. Both of them are free website blogs that connect friends and family during a health challenge.

When battling cancer or any other compromising disease, the primary consideration is what is most comfortable for you.

While there are those who will choose to keep their health battle private, I for one am convinced that there is power in the connection with and love from friends. Blogging also helped me find my voice, and allowed me to express my thoughts about the struggles cancer brings to all those affected. It served as a soul cleansing for me.

But remember – blogging is not just for the sick. There are several blogs I follow from very healthy family and friends who’ve created a blog for different reasons. Family friend Lindsey keeps a blog about her current adventure - studying abroad in London. My daughter Allyson keeps a blog about transitioning from college into the world of work and adult life. Heather’s blog, Sunshine Dreams to You, is about discovering a life of dreams fulfilled with our authentic selves. And a friend from Hendrix, Mr. Bobo, varies his posts from nostalgia to humor, my favorite being his suggestion of friends gathering to help write one another’s obituaries, with martinis included.

Blogging is becoming more and more popular each day. It’s fun, a creative outlet, an avenue to be heard, and a way to stay connected, or sometimes create new connections. Why not give it a try. There are many reasons good reasons to join the blogosphere.

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Seek magazine is a publication of the UAMS Winthrop P. Rockefeller Cancer Institute. And during this last year, I’ve found the stories and articles published to be not only informative but very inspiring too. This month Seek has a story about patients who share their cancer journeys online – Coping One Keystroke at a Time. WARNING: Yes, the story mentions my blog, but there is also the story about another blogger, a husband from Atlanta, who found comfort during his wife’s struggle with multiple myeloma.

Treatment Side Effects • More Treatment • More Side Effects

2011-06-06T07:34:00.000-05:00

The cancer is cured, but the physical and mental burden of treatment side effects continues. And that’s the reality for a cancer survivor.

The long-term side effects of chemotherapy can be many, including, heart & kidney failure, infertility, liver problems, lung disease and cataracts. For me, chemo’s side effects have mainly been continued fatigue, chemo brain and osteoporosis. Dealing with fatigue is simple – more sleep. Adjusting to chemo brain – well, it’s the hope that it will disappear in time. But the loss of bone density has been uncomfortable, sometimes even painful. And in my case, I’ve also broken a few bones in my feet. It’s not been pleasant. Bone density loss is not only caused by the chemotherapy but also by the hormone inhibitor that I take daily – Arimidex.

But today I’ll begin a new treatment that should improve my bone density levels, where my legs, hips and lower back have experienced porous and brittle bones. I call them my paper bones, very fragile and not so strong. Hopefully this will be another new wonder drug in my life..

Reclast is an intravenous infusion that I’ll take annually – yes, once a year. Wouldn’t it be great if we could take our drugs only once a year? The Reclast will hopefully strengthen by bones and protect them from broken bones and fracture for an entire year – and then I’ll receive another infusion of Reclast next year, and the year after, and the year after. It’s that simple.

And there’s good news about Reclast. In fact, the news is so good that I’m almost happy that the various drugs have given me arthritis. For women with aggressive breast cancers who’ve received aggressive chemotherapy treatment, who have then developed osteoarthritis and received Reclast as a treatment drug, researchers are recording a reduction in cancer recurrence.

Did you say a reduction in recurrence? I’m all over that! Another notch in my belt to hopefully never see this cancer again!

Researchers are not certain as to what it is about Reclast that is attributing to a reduction in cancer recurrence. That’s why I’ll also join a research study at UAMS to hopefully discover the connection.

Oh yes – there are side effects of Reclast. Short-term side effects at the time of infusion include flu-like symptoms including fever, muscle and joint pain, and headaches. Long-term side effects can include atrial fibrillation (abnormal heart rhythm) and increased risk of stroke.

Oh well, you’ve got to take the good with the bad. I’m ready to get these bones back to where they were, strong again, no pain. And when the bones are repaired, I have a beautiful new bike waiting for me in the garage, a gift from dear friends, and I’m anxious to get these legs back to work, get back on my bike and ride!

Here’s to Reclast!

BReast Friends Forever

2011-06-04T17:13:00.000-05:00

I’ve long had my best friends. But during the past eighteen months, I have built a cadre of “BReast Friends.” It’s my new sisterhood, women like me who are battling, or have fought the battle of breast cancer. This morning I have made added a new sister, a new BReast friend into my life. Her name is Denise.

Denise found me on the Internet, through this blog, researching her doctors at UAMS. We have the same medical team – Klimberg, Makhoul and Yuen – which is excellent news for her. And because Arkansas is one small town, we figured out through social media that we have several friends in common. That’s all we needed to know to legitimize a visit by phone this morning.

Like me, Denise is a mother and a professional woman, as well. And like many of us, and another 560 women each day in the US, she has been given the devastating news of breast cancer - Invasive Ductal Carcinoma. Some will say IDC is the most common type of breast cancers. But for those of us who are survivors, we know there is nothing “common” about any kind of cancer. It’s all terrible, none of it good! And that’s what Denise and I talked about this morning by phone. This week she will put on her boxing gloves and begin her wrestle with the alligator, the first of eight chemotherapy treatments.

We talked about the miracle potion called chemo, losing your hair, wearing hats versus wigs, learning to receive rather than to give, the tough road for our children, and the all-powerful love of family, friends and colleagues. We visited about food, not tempting the nausea Gods, eating stomach friendly protein foods like chicken and eggs. And then we talked about UAMS and our medical team, and I assured her that she was in the best hands.

My new BReast friend feels like all of us at the time of our diagnosis – the Jekyll &Hyde dilemma, I call it. One minute you feel incredibly empowered, filled with all the courage needed to kill the beast. And then, without any warning, a wave of fear consumes your soul, the vulnerability of a daunting disease that has invaded your body and turned your life upside down. But in the end, Denise will be fine, as she has found spiritual peace in the words of Joshua 1, verse 9:

“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go.”

Denise and I have not yet met, but we’re already fast friends, BReast friends, women connected through the unfortunate journey of cancer. But she will join our sisterhood and will be blessed by the love of so many good feminine souls – friends like Ellen, Kathy, Frances, Paula, Kelley, Meredith, Liz, Robin, Carol Ann, Mary, Mare, Barbara, Angie, Coco, Penny and so many more. Some of these strong women I have known for almost a lifetime; others I only met this year. Most have had breast cancer; some have experienced other types of cancer. But they have all blessed me with their strength and perseverance, courageous spirit and inspiration. And yes, they have all survived this nasty cancer.

Welcome Denise, to the BReast Friends Club. It’s not a club any of us wanted to join, but we’re here for you. Rest assured, your BReast friends will love you, care for you, serve as prayer warriors and be by your side when you need us. We’ve faced this journey before and have all landed on the other side. Yippee! We’ll stand by your side as you walk down this tough road called cancer, and we’ll be there to celebrate when you cross the finish line too.

Prayers for you Denise – for hope, faith, courage and healing.

Me, and millions of others, pondering Heaven

2011-06-02T13:30:00.000-05:00

One of the things I have always liked about travel is the ability to be without the distractions of home and read a good book. And that’s what I’ve done on this trip to DC. I’ve actually read two books and now reading my third.

The first book I read my mother recommended, even though she’s not yet read it. She shared with me a book given to her on Mother’s Day by my nieces, Emily and Olivia. As Mom began to share the story with me, I was immediately captured. For you see, like so many who believe in God, I have been forever curious about what awaits us at death.

If you haven’t read Heaven is for Real by Todd Burpo, I highly recommend it. It’s short, an easy read, and to the point – and the amazing story of a 4-year-old buy who entered into heaven when he went into unconsciousness during emergency surgery for a ruptured appendix. Months later, the young boy, Colton Burpo, begins to share bits and pieces of his brief visit to heaven, thus the book seven years later written by his father, author Todd Burpo.

I recall the time many years ago when Anna-Lee was about the same age, a little younger. It was a Saturday afternoon and the girls and I were napping. Long story short, Anna-Lee woke me up to tell me there was someone in our house, downstairs in the kitchen. Once the police arrived and confirmed that we’d had an intruder, they also confirmed children at this age can’t make this stuff up.

And while children at this age have little capacity to relay much beyond their own experience, I began my reading with a critical eye for an embellished story by a pastor-father looking for a book opportunity. I never found it. Instead, I found Colton Burpo's childlike descriptions to be a refreshing depiction of what awaits each of us whose destiny is Heaven. Colton confirms that Jesus really does love children, and he encounters his great-grandfather “Pop” who he has no knowledge of since the man died in a car accident thirty years ago, when the author was only six-years-old. He also meets a young child who he says was a sister he didn’t know about – Colton not knowing that his mother had miscarried a child before Colton was born. There is much more.

Colton’s story helped me revisit a nagging question I’ve had for many years: If we know we’re going to die, why are we so afraid of it?

Let me be clear. I’m not saying we should give in to death, throw in the towel at times of life threatening accidents or disease. Oh no, not at all. Life is good, and our obsessive nature to prolong life with ordinary means is what brings about recovery, a patient’s turn for the better, survival and a renewed sense of living. But if what Colton experienced is for real, and because Christ invited us to come to Him and receive the promise of heaven, then what is there to be afraid of?

If the promise of heaven is not something you believe in, this book is probably not for you. However, if you mourn the loss of someone special in your life, if you wonder if you will be reunited with those who have passed on, if you are looking to find comfort in the finality of death, this Colton Burpo’s story IS for you. Like me, I hope you find a sense of calm and reassurance from this inspiring story.

Another thing you might want to know – this book, Colton’s story, has been on the New York Times bestseller list for the past 27 weeks. Click here for a great NY Times review. No doubt, I’m not the only one curious about heaven.

My Dr. McCool

2011-05-31T09:44:00.000-05:00

Last night the local television station obviously was in need of a health story to use for the holiday weekend. And while I’m out of town and missed it, several friends sent me a message that KTHV used a story from last year’s Breast Cancer Awareness Month package, an interview with my Dr. McCool – or as they spell it at UAMS, Dr. Issam Makhoul.

Here's the link. It’s actually an interview with both of us. And while the story gave too much credit to the spirit of the patient, I will always know that it was Dr. Makhoul who cured my cancer. As I shared with friends this weekend, if I had chosen to receive cancer treatment from a dentist in Booger Hollow, I don’t think my spirit of resolve would have taken my cure very far. While the spirit of the patient is important, it’s the brilliance of the doctor and the medical team and the clinic that delivers the cure.

Watching the clip via the Internet reminded me about so many things about this wonderful physician of extraordinary ability, and I must share, wondering if you agree.

Today, there’s a real buzz about being an active or informed “health care consumer” with some going so far as to mention “consumer-directed health care.” While I agree that being an informed patient is a wise move, I own a B.A. degree in social science! It would not be in my best interest to try to be the director of my cancer care. What a disaster – which is why the credentials of the physician and the doctor-patient relationship are the crucibles of quality health care.

In the eyes of UAMS and Dr. Makhoul, I have always been a patient in need of medical care – not a health care consumer. And I never believed their patient care and treatment services to be a commodity. Far from it!

I’ve always been amazed at how much time Dr. Makhoul spends with each patient, never rushed, always explaining in detail the science of the disease, the pros and cons of treatment options, side-effects and obstacles. I could read all day about Inflammatory Breast Cancer and never be a step ahead of this man. It would not be long before I began to ask him one question: “If I was your sister, what would you recommend for me?” He would then share his suggested course of treatment, and that was ALWAYS the choice I made.

(A note of humor: For those of you who know Tim, you won’t be surprised that one day we were leaving UAMS and he said to me, “I sure hope Dr. Makhoul likes his sister.” It would be Tim’s humor that surely got me through some tough times.)

Dr. Makhoul and Nurse B and Nurse Michelle – they will forever be my medical caretakers (along with Drs. Klimberg and Yuen) and I will always be their patient. And that’s the kind of relationship I want with my health care provider.

Thank you Dr. Makhoul. It’s now May 30, 2011. It’s been 468 days since I’ve been in your care. One year, three months and 14 days later, I still feel an incredible sense of faith in your abilities, and UAMS too. And for that, I am very grateful.

Leaving on a Jet Plane

2011-05-27T07:58:00.000-05:00

Other than a few car trips to Missouri to see Allyson graduate or visit her in St. Louis, the last real vacation I had was in June 2009, a wonderful trip we took to Springfield, IL, and then several days in Chicago. Before that, Tim and I took my parents and their friends John & Nancy Anthony on a Blue & BBQ road trip through the Mississippi Delta. But it’s been over two years since I’ve been on a plane trip.

Today I feel like a kid in a candy store, as in a few hours I’m boarding a flight to Washington, DC – my very favorite place in America! I’ll attend a conference on America’s competitive workforce Wednesday through Friday. But between now and then, I’m looking forward to several days of rest and great fun with longtime friends from college.

Used to for me, living meant traveling. I’m kind of like George Bailey in It’s A Wonderful Life when he said that the three most exciting sounds in the world are anchor chains, plane motors and train whistles. But travel hasn’t been in the cards for me in quite a while. So I’m very excited about getting on a plane and taking off for a new adventure.

Traveling in my new normal world is quite different. Anytime I get on a plane, it now requires wearing a lymphedema sleeve on my right arm. The sleeve reminds me of a wet suit for the arm – a very tight compression garment to prevent the onset of lymphedema.

Most people don’t know what lymphedema is until they have it. For me, it's something I'll hope to prevent the rest of my life. Lymphedema is caused when there is trauma caused to the lymphatic system – in my case, cancer in the lymphatic system that required surgically removing 17 lymph nodes. Lymphedema, or lymphatic obstruction occurs when there is blockage of the lymph vessels that drain fluid from tissues throughout the body and allow immune cells to travel where they are needed. Cancer patients who develop lymphedema do so usually in the first four years after surgery. It's another post-cancer complication I certainly hope to avoid.

The physical discomfort is usually fluid retention and swelling in the arm, and sometimes the swelling is constant and horrific. But the really bad news is this . . . Once you have lymphedema, it’s very difficult to get rid of it. So, the secret here is PREVENTION.

Today I have my house sitter well supplied, the dogs fed, bags packed, my ticket in hand, and I’m wearing my very important lymphedema arm sleeve that will be my new companion every time I board a plane. I sure hope this thing works.

After landing, I’m ripping this sleeve off to enjoy several days in my safe place – with very best friends who allow you to share your most personal self and not feel afraid. Our plans are simple – good food and wine, updates on our lives, and mentally traveling on our time machine to recall special days gone by.

As Thoreau said, true friends cherish one another’s hopes and are kind to one another’s dreams.

I’m very excited about boarding this plane, but even happier about spending the days ahead with cherished friends.

I hope you enjoy a very memorable holiday weekend too.

Cooking Kale – A Super Food (Can I post twice in one day?)

2011-05-14T13:14:00.000-05:00

Keeping with my new venture for eating most things local, this morning was another day at the Farmers Market. I attended two – the new Hillcrest Farmers Market and the Certified Arkansas Farmer’s Market. Both of these markets only include local farmers with local meats and produce - fresh, clean food from small family farms. Last spring and summer I was only able to get to the market one time. But this year is different. Saturday mornings have become my time to shop each market for the foods I want for the meals I’ll prepare throughout the week.

Today I bought some lovely chickens from Cove Creek Acres, a local poultry and pork farm located in Clarksville, AR. And the pork chops we cooked this week from Farm Girl Natural Foods – well, it was simply the best pork I’ve ever tasted. So, I bought more chops, a pork loin and some sausage. I also bought sweet onions, kale, mushrooms, more English peas, fresh lettuce, green onions and Arkansas strawberries. In the meantime, I’ll have to buy out-of-state but organically grown tomatoes at the market. I sure will be happy when the Arkansas tomatoes are ready for harvest. There’s nothing much better than Arkansas strawberries and tomatoes.

Yesterday a good friend asked me about my new love for that leafy green vegetable known as kale. I really didn’t know anything abut kale, never ate it until cancer. My friend Leslie brought a big bunch of it to my house and showed me a very simple method for roasting it in the oven. Since then, I’ve discovered it’s an uber-nutritious vegetable full of vitamins A, C and K, and the all important anti-oxidant vitamin E. Kale is also a great source of manganese, calcium and iron, has no cholesterol, and offers a nice serving of fiber and protein.

I think the reason I never cooked with kale is that it’s much tougher than other leafy greens compared to turnip greens and spinach. So you’ll seldom find anyone using it to make a salad or cream sauce, even though I’ve since found several recipes for kale used with soups and stir fries.

But the recipe below is about as easy and good as you can get and only requires three ingredients. I’m sharing it with you in hopes that you’ll also discover this fabulous vegetable continues to be listed as one of the Super Foods. Super Foods are only good if you know what to do with them.

Roasted Kale with Sea Salt

4 cups firmly-packed kale

1 to 2 Tbsp. extra virgin olive oil (I sometimes use Sesame Oil for a different flavor)

1 tsp. good-quality sea salt (I’ve been using lemon sea salt)

Directions

Preheat oven to 375 degrees F. Wash and trim the kale: Peel off the tough stems by folding the kale leaves in half like a book and stripping the stems off. Toss with extra virgin olive oil. Roast for five minutes. Turn kale over. Roast another 7 to 10 minutes until kale turns brown and becomes paper thin and brittle. Remove from oven and sprinkle with sea salt. Serve immediately.

I’ve seen a few other recipes that add some minced garlic, ground black pepper and toasted sesame seeds. Everybody’s palate is different so do with it what you like. But today I bought two sacks of kale and plan on enjoying its wonderful flavor throughout the week.

If you want to buy local, the Farmers Market is where you want to be. And if you can’t get there on Saturdays, then try shopping at local food markets such as Argenta Market in North Little Rock, or Terry’s or Hestand’s in the Heights. All of these locally owned markets do a terrific job of buying from local farmers too.

Eat healthy, and eat local when you can. It's really not difficult, just requires changing a few old shopping habits.

Single Parenting with Cancer takes a Legal Hit

2011-05-14T07:35:00.000-05:00

A recently decided custody battle has been getting a lot of attention recently, especially inside the cancer community.

On the losing side: A North Carolina mother with stage 4 breast cancer whose two children, ages 5 and 11, were taken away because of her terminal illness. On the winning side, the healthy father who divorced his wife, Alaina Giordano, after her diagnosis. Several months ago he decided to move to Chicago, and now he wants his kids. Essentially, the judge said, a healthy dad is better than a sick mom.

Make no mistake – this divorce was replete with accusations of physical and mental abuse, extra-marital affairs and mental illness. But it was the father who chose to leave North Carolina to pursue a job in Chicago, and it was the judge cited breast cancer as the deciding factor. Custody agreements, in theory, are based on what's in a child's best interest, but moving the children away from their friends, their schools and their mother at a time when her life expectancy is uncertain is incomprehensible.

In her ruling, Judge Nancy Gordon cited forensic psychologist Dr. Helen Brantley: "The more contact [the children] have with the non-ill parent, the better they do. Children want a normal childhood, and it is not normal with an ill parent."

This issue isn’t over and will long be debated in the court of law and the court of public opinion. In the meantime, Alaina has started a blog and well-meaning friends have begun a Facebook page: Alaina Giordano Should Not Lose Her Kids Because She Has Breast Cancer.

On her blog, Alaina writes this:

I AM NOT CANCER.

I am Alaina. I was diagnosed with cancer in December 2007. I am not cancer.

I am a mother of two remarkable children. I am not cancer.

I am a daughter to loving parents. I am not cancer.

I am a sister to two amazing women. I am not cancer.

I am a friend to so many wonderful people. I am not cancer.

I AM NOT CANCER

I plan on staying on top of this issue. It’s difficult to imagine that this kind of child custody ruling could become the norm, that we could begin to see laws passed that suggest effective parenting is contingent on being in optimal health.

Medical update:

Last week I went to see my oncologist Dr. Makhoul for some blood work and my regular checkup – and the news is good.

First, my vitamin D levels are finally normal and I’ll soon begin the Reclast treatment to increase my bone density levels. This is good news, especially since I had an accident last Friday with my toe and a big piece of furniture in the den. I went online to find out what can be done with a broken toe, and most articles said there’s not much you can do. So, I did nothing, until yesterday. With pain and swelling moving into my foot, I got worried – this wasn’t getting any better, only worse. Sure enough, I went to see my neighbor/friend and local podiatrist Dr. Richard Bronfman, and I have a nice clean break across my toe. Eeeeks – no wonder it hurts. I’m now wearing a beautiful black boot, my toe wrapped up in gauze and tape. I need to get my bones back to where they need to be. They are as frail as paper right now.

Second, my tumor markers came back negative. I have long heard the phrase “tumor marker” but had no idea what that meant until last week. This will be a test I’ll have every three months for who knows how long. Tumor markers are substances that can be found in the body (in my case, the blood) when cancer is present. Tumor markers can be used to identify hormones, proteins or parts of proteins to determine if cancer is present. My tumor markers should always remain below a 31. Last week my tumor marker test – 16! What a fabulous kind of test to see if cancer is trying to stir itself back up in your body. While there still is no cure, there are some remarkable tests and procedures that continue to amaze me.

I continue to move along and feel better all the time. Yes, my resistance is down and I seem to pick up all kinds of infections that used to not be an issue. Ear infections, a fever virus – you name it, I can pick it up right now. But I’m not going to let this get me down. Life’s been fun – an evening cruise down the Arkansas River, a French dinner party where Tim and I were the “celebrity chefs,” floating the Buffalo National River, a day at the horse races, a reunion celebration with Hendrix College friends, a decadent dinner and beautiful evening at P. Allen Smith’s Garden Home, and now regular visits to the Farmer’s Market to keep my 80% plant diet on track. Life is good and I’m enjoying every day.

I hope you’re enjoying the spring weather as much as me.

Damn it! I Hate Cancer!

2011-05-03T21:46:00.000-05:00

For me, it seems like cancer has become epidemic. Or maybe I’m just more sensitive to the stories about each new diagnosis. I’m not sure. But it seems like the nasty cancer keeps finding a way to invade the lives of people I love.

About a month ago, some longtime family friends shared with me that their daughter has been diagnosed with breast cancer – and the really evil stuff, Inflammatory Breast Cancer. I knew her when she was a little girl. Today she's a young woman, married with small children, and now she carries the burden of IBC. Just terrible news.

Last week, another friend called to give me an update on his sister, also battling Inflammatory Cancer. Her battle has been tough, treatment hard to handle, treatment now put on hold, and she’s not doing so well.

On Saturday, my darling cousin in Texas lost her mother-in-law to colon cancer. Her mother-in-law lost her own husband just a few short years ago to pancreatic cancer. It hardly seems fair for my cousin’s husband – to lose both of his parents in only a few short years, both of them taken by the ravages of cancer.

Yesterday I found out that another longtime friend, who has been in remission for about two years – well, he got the bad news call. The cancer is back.

Last night I received a late-night email from another dear friend, a kindred spirit whose sister died many years ago from Inflammatory Breast Cancer. My friend found a lump, had an appointment with the radiologist, and has now been told she too has breast cancer.

And just today at UAMS, I ran into one of my cancer soul sisters. Throughout my own journey, she helped keep my spirits high, served as a gracious role model for how to have cancer with great dignity. She’s a classy and tough as grizzle woman who has fought the good fight and made it to the other side. That is, until today. Her breast cancer has returned, even though she went ahead with the double mastectomy. WHAT? Breast cancer without breasts? Unbelievable. What will it take to stop this monster from continuing this ravage on our bodies?

Tonight I’m mad as hell, and yes, I'm scared too. I hate cancer and it feels like it’s closing in!

HELP - Somebody! Make it go away!

Did I mention that I'm scared?

Encouragement from Survivors & Research

2011-05-01T09:43:00.000-05:00

Breast cancer, no matter the circumstances, is terrible. Make no mistake – all cancers are bad. It’s a disease that once diagnosed haunts the body and stalks the mind forever. There are no good cancers. Period.

Having said that, there are some diagnosed with breast cancer who are able to battle the disease without having a to surgically remove the breast. And then there are others, like me, where a mastectomy is mandatory, not an option. The issue can then become a decision about prevention -- “Do I remove the one breast, or both?” Called a prophylactic or risk-reducing mastectomy, it’s a procedure to eliminate the chance of developing cancer in a second breast,. It’s often recommended when a woman exhibits risk factors for the cancer to move to the other breast - age, family history, and the presence of invasive or high-risk cancer cells

The benefits of a preventive mastectomy are simple – removing the second breast significantly reduces the chance of developing cancer in the other breast. Real simple. I

The risks associated with removing both breasts are twofold: (1) The normal risks associated with any kind of surgery, and (2) Because a preventive mastectomy is irreversible, the psychological effects on a woman’s body image of loss of normal breast function must be considered.

And let me tell you, the psychological effects can be real.

During my own breast cancer battle, it would be almost ten days before the mastectomy surgery that I would have my first real emotional meltdown. From February through June, I surprised myself by staying emotionally stable, my head in the game of cancer treatment. However, as the July date for the mastectomy approached, I became terrified, worried about so drastically altering my body. While I’d never had a love affair with my breasts, they were mine and I really didn’t want to lose them. It was a tough time of great anxiety, and sometimes a river of tears. However, though the help of survivor friends and a little therapy, the logical mind would take over, and I successfully made the mental adjustment a few days before surgery.

At Friday’s annual meeting of the American Society of Breast Surgeons in Washington, D.C., there was good news for those of us who've been faced with the "one or two" mastectomy decision.

Researchers at the Mayo Clinic in Rochester, Minn., questioned hundreds of women who sacrificed a healthy breast in the hope of avoiding another cancer. Twenty years after their surgery, 97 percent said they would make the same decision again. Details about the research can be found by clicking here.

Throughout this cancer journey, I’ve been blessed by amazing women who have openly shared with me their pain and fears, and their stories of conquering the beast. These champion women remained by my side to calm my fears and hug my soul. Their stories gave me the hope I needed to fight strong, a much better strategy than traveling the journey alone.

And now we have encouraging news from almost 300 women who 20-years ago were faced with some of these same tough decisions – one breast or two? It’s nice to know that looking back, they would do it all over again.

Thank goodness for survivors who share their stories, and for research that calms our hearts. I am thankful.

Cooking Cancer

2011-04-26T17:36:00.000-05:00

As one oncologist said to me, “Once cancer has invaded your body, the potential for recurrence is always present. Stay emotionally calm and healthy. Remember, stress cooks cancer.”

And he was right.

For those of us in the cancer survivors club, we are all too familiar with regular references to relieving stress during and after treatment. And while a little bit of stress can do us good from time to time, chronic stress can define our overall health and is a widely known to adversely effect the immune system, increasing the risk of heart disease, hypertension, obesity, diabetes and depression.

For a number of years, almost 30 to be exact, researchers have also tried to determine the impact of stress on cancer. Now comes research released only a few short weeks ago from M.D. Anderson Cancer Institute.

M.D. Anderson has been examining how stress might promote cancer in order to better understand the role of stress in cancer patients to reduce its negative influence. And here is what they've discovered:

Stress is a normal function of life. In fact, occasional stress can actually be good in terms of improving cognitive function and the body's immune system. However, chronic stress can and does negatively impact every system in the body.
While stress has not been proven to initiate cancer, there is ample evidence suggesting that chronic stress can promote tumor growth, progression, and metastasis.

You can read more about the details of the study by clicking here.

Future research by M.D. Anderson will delve into a stress ranking system; in other words, how to rank what are called “stressors” based on how individuals respond psychologically, physiologically and behaviorally to various challenging events. And that’s what makes it complicated. We all have our different stress thresholds, similar to our pain thresholds. So each of us has a different “breaking point” in terms of stress. What may feel like stress for one woman could likely feel energizing for another.

Hans Selye (the father of stress studies) once wrote of the rabbit and the turtle. Some of us approach life more like a rabbit, running from place to place, nibbling when we can, shooting off in all directions. Others approach life more like a turtle, proceeding methodically from point to point with careful attention to detail, taking things one at a time. Both extremes are healthy. What is unhealthy, or stressful, is trying to be different from our nature. For example, the rabbit says to his or her turtle spouse, "You never want to go anywhere or do anything." The turtle, feeling guilty, decides to become a rabbit for the night and go barhopping with the rabbit spouse. That, Selye says, is what causes stress- being untrue to our nature.

I admit - I’m the rabbit. Competition, multi-tasking and risk-taking have long been a big part of my normal day. The constant life of a turtle would be very difficult for me. Take for example my job – public relations. Just last week my daughter sent me a CNN article that names PR as the second highest stressful job, a career she is now pursuing. Really? For me, the world of public relations feels like healthy competition, the challenge of deadlines, and the ability to conquer tough assignments. I just really like what I do, but I'm also wondering if maybe I’ve just become accustomed to a stressful lifestyle. Yes, I’m a risk taker, never been accused of avoiding harm if the stakes are high. But is this good for me long-term?

With all of that said, I’m working to eliminate stress from my life, and it seems to be agreeing with me.

I’m finding Saturdays and Sundays to sometimes be good “turtle days” – never leaving the house, piddling with projects here at home, enjoying the peace and quiet and solitude.
I'm getting better at saying "no" - not to my children or my clients, but to all the worthy community projects that call my heard. If not "no", at least I'm getting better at explaining my limitations
I'm settling in to the best use of me and my talents at CJRW. I've long enjoyed strategic planning with clients, and PR writing too. So, I'm spending more time with these client projects, and it's suiting my lifestyle very well.
And just today, I’ve decided to join a course long overdue – yoga. Years ago my meditation training introduced the practice of yoga. But not wanting to take on too much at one time, I just stayed focused on the meditation. But more and more research continues to show that yoga provides both physical and psychological support for breast cancer survivors, and other cancers too – creating a calmer existence, relieving anxiety, reducing depression and strengthening the body from the side effects of treatment. So, I’ve signed up and looking forward to a 6 week introductory class at Barefoot Studio. And what a lovely place – they give breast cancer survivors a discount. Wahoo!

If you have OR have had cancer, what’s your plan? Don’t waste a minute - put STRESS RELIEF on the top of your pile. Do it today! Stop cooking cancer.

Cancer Repellent: Good Meds, Healthy Foods & Exercising with Friends

2011-04-17T19:43:00.000-05:00

Some random thoughts on a beautiful Sunday afternoon . . .

My physical condition remains the same – feeling better each day with a slow but steady increase in energy. I’m not where I used to be, and probably never will, especially due to the side effects of daily medications required for the next several years – specifically bone and joint pain, weakness and fatigue. But I’m sold on Arimidex, (versus Tamoxifen) and here’s why:

Studies show that 5 years of Arimidex is better than 5 years of tamoxifen for two main reasons: (1) Arimidex increases the time before the cancer comes back for those who experience recurrence, and (2) Arimidex reduces the risk of the cancer spreading to other parts of the body.

For me, dealing with bone and joint pain is a far better alternative than dealing with cancer. I think anybody would agree with that.

This week I will complete my regime of 100,000 units of Vitamin D each week. Hopefully I will soon begin Reclast, an infusion treatment for women like me who are experiencing thin, weak bones due to the absence of estrogen and chemo-induced osteoporosis. Oncologists are finding great success with Reclast as cancer survivors on this treatment, for some unknown reason, are experiencing a reduced rate of recurrence. Woohoo! Another notch in my insurance belt – and I’ll take it! And I’ll also participate in one of many cancer studies conducted at the Winthrop Rockefeller Cancer Institute.

*******

I’m looking forward to the leg pain hopefully going away soon as exercise has been somewhat tough for me. Heck, just walking across the parking lot or down stairs can be a real stretch most days.

Some very dear friends gave me a bike last week, a very good and cool bike, too. These folks are huge bike enthusiasts, and I mean the serious kind, complete with bike racks, the proper clothes and hours long bike trips. As my friend upgraded to a better bike, I got her leftover. But let me put this in perspective. It’s like if your friend bought a Mercedes Benz G-Class SUV and gave you her Lexus sedan. It’s real nice! I’ve ridden it a few times in the neighborhood and look forward to more bike excursions after my legs get stronger. What great friends. And speaking of good friends, I did enjoy a walk over the Big Dam Bridge this week with a new cancer survivor friend, a very special lady indeed. We’re both young widowed breast cancer survivors – what a combination. But we’re strong as steel survivors on both fronts.

*********

About food – I’ve gotten myself on a new food regime, and it seems to suit me well. I’ve lot 8 pounds, very slowly, but it will take time to shed this unwanted weight from a year of steroids and a sedentary lifestyle. No diets for me! When you love to cook and eat, diets are like living in prison. But I have made several switches to my food habits

§ More of a plant-based diet, hoping to ultimately get to an 80-20 combination . . . . 80% plant-based food, 20% meat. Some of the best anti-cancer vegetables include broccoli, Brussels sprouts, kale (try a little roasted kale in the oven – delicious!), peppers, sweet potatoes, tomatoes, red onions, squash, carrots, cauliflower and green beans.

§ Less red meat, more seafood. And I’m only buying certified humane meats, which has limited my meat suppliers but it’s worth the trip. Healthier meat, better tasting and I know that these animals, from birth through slaughter, have been raised humanely.

§ Lots more fruits. I’m especially grown fond of having a sweet piece of fruit each night before bed. Some of the best anti-cancer fruits include blueberries, strawberries, oranges, peaches, apricots, grapes and tangerines.

§ I’ve added a consistent increase of fiber to my diet with a helping of granola (stay away from the sweet kind) that tops a bowl of yogurt every morning. Yogurt is a new power food added to my diet at least once each day. It’s one of the very best sources of calcium, and has proven to slow tumor growth by 75% when tested with animals.

§ Green tea has been added to my diet. I have to say it’s still taking me some time to get used to the “green thing” – especially switching from the standard Chai Tea Lattes to Green Tea Chai Latte. It’s very green!

§ In addition, I’ve added a daily intake of fish oil. Click here for an new development about fish oil possibly helping breast cancer survivors successfully battle the loss of muscle tissue. As clinical trials will begin soon, I'm all about going ahead with a fish oil supplement as it's rich in Omega-3 fatty acids and can be attributed to aiding in the treatment of many diseases - heart disease, high cholesterol, depression, anxiety, low immunity, arthritis, diabetes and more. Here's a good web site for a high quality fish oil product that is without contaminants.

§ I'm trying hard to add lots of 64 ounces water to my diet, but it's been a struggle. I so enjoy coffee all morning, iced tea in the afternoon, lemonade and pomegranate juice in the evening and a hot chamomile tea before bed. I'm a creature of habit and it's difficult to change. But I'll keep trying.

Does all this healthy food living mean I can no longer be a gourmet food gal? No way! I’m simply learning to prepare foods differently, using alternative ingredients, to make the final dish a bit healthier. Though occasional, there will still be the traditional favorites still prepared for my family and friends. No kitchen of mine will go without the lovely smell of braised short ribs on top of a dollop of rustic mashed potatoes, shrimp & cheese grits, and Spanish Paella. But tonight we’ll be cooking braised chicken with creamy leeks.

I’m almost certain I’ve never purchased magazines like Weight Watcher’s or Cooking Light. For a cook and gourmand like me, the recipes just don’t cut it in the tasty category. But I have found a new magazine that I’m quite fond of . . . Eating Well. The subtitle says it all: Where Good Taste Meets Good Health. I highly recommend it for all you cooks who want great flavor along with good nutrition.

**********

We are enjoying beautiful days in Arkansas. Friday at Oaklawn was a little piece of heaven – corned beef sandwiches and all. And the Farmer’s markets will soon open over the next several weeks. That means lots of opportunities for fresh produce and cooking on the grill. I love spring with all the signs of new beginnings, and this one seems to be even more special. Both of my girls will be home this weekend for Easter so I’m anxiously getting ready for their arrival, and anticipating some good “girl time” together.

I hope the spring season is off to a good start for you, as well.

Embracing Gratitude

2011-04-03T14:16:00.000-05:00

IF THE ONLY PRAYER YOU SAID IN YOUR LIFE WAS "THANK YOU", THAT WOULD SUFFICE. ~ Meister Eckhart

I’ve begun a new habit – a good habit this time.

While doing some spring-cleaning, I found several journals purchased that have never had the stroke of a pen touch the paper. A stack of three beautiful journals sat on top of the bookcase for several days until the idea came to me as clear as day.

While this blog has been my journey of cancer and my personal experience of getting to the other side, I have now begun to write each night before sleep my list of what I’m grateful for. Naturally the list is ever changing based on the events of the day. But it’s a habit that I hope to keep doing for all the days ahead, to maintain my attitude of gratitude for all of my blessings. As one friend shared with me recently, feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it.

So, while I will continue to periodically write in this blog, I wanted to pass along this new habit, maybe something you might consider doing yourself. Honestly, it's an uplifting way to end the day, and the entry need not be laborious.

After this long year of fighting cancer, and now fighting the after-effects of cancer treatment, I’ve come to believe that attitude is actually a form of medicine too. When trying to define it, I think attitude is simply your approach to life, your general demeanor or disposition, your overall life mood, your response inclination to daily life events.

What is your thought life? And if it’s not what you want it to be, how can you change it?

There are so many things that can influence our life thoughts.

Spiritual life, such as the belief in and worship for a higher power, spiritual practices like prayer and meditation, a feeling of heart and soul.
Connections to the human community, such a family, friends and even strangers who we encounter each day.
A sense of purpose or a life mission that allows us to give back, make the world a better place.
An overwhelming body blanket of peace, calm and comfort with the world.

But there is one thing I know to be true. We are in control of how we view the world and our lives, how we react and respond to life happenings. Positive life circumstances do not come from negative thoughts or action. I’ve often told my girls to remember that nobody makes you happy or sad or angry. These are choices that we make ourselves. By taking control of our own emotions, by pursuing a path of emotional health and abundant joy, the quality of life improves tenfold.

Last night I wrote into my gratitude journal five things I’m happy about, five huge things that I was especially grateful for yesterday.

After an evening at Moss Mountain Farm, my college friend P. Allen Smith’s Garden Home, I am grateful to live in Arkansas, among such natural beauty and splendor only minutes from my urban dwelling.
I am grateful for longtime friends who have been in my world, as Dickens said, through the best and worst of times, friends like Dennie who's come back home to Arkansas, which has made life even more of an adventure.
I’m grateful for puppies that lick you in the face each morning, their kind and gentle way of asking for breakfast.
I feel blessed that my life has allowed me to know and spend time with philanthropic and community giants like my friend Mr. Maurice Mitchell, who passed away yesterday. His was a life that was a sermon unto itself.
I’m grateful to be healthy again this spring, especially after planting my herb garden yesterday. Last year’s herb garden didn’t happen and the anticipation of abundant basil and mint and cilantro and the rest . . . well, it's kept a smile on my face all weekend.

The number of cancer survivors in the United States increased by nearly 2 million from 2001 to 2007. There were 11.7 million survivors in 2007, up from 9.8 million in 2001. If attitude is truly a powerful medicine for mind and body, we’re all going to need new habits to keep our spirits high, and our days filled with gratitude.

“In daily life, we must see that it is not happiness that makes us grateful,

but gratefulness that makes us happy.”

The Medicine of Mind & Body

2011-03-07T05:30:00.000-06:00

A longtime friend battling another disease, not cancer, called this past week. She asked, “how did you keep a positive attitude during the worst days of cancer?” I’ve spent the past several days thinking about that, reflecting and trying to put it all in perspective, and in writing. So, for the next several days, I’ve decided to write about the mental state of battling disease. I’m not a psychologist, nor a student of this topic. Everything I write is based on my own personal experience this past year, and in years past.

********************

I’ll always remember the first day I met Dr. Makhoul, my UAMS oncologist. After the initial diagnosis, I spent almost ten days having a variety of tests to find out more about my particular cancer. With a full report in hand, Dr. Makhoul spent almost two hours with me sharing the details of the results - Stage III-B Inflammatory Breast Cancer, which had also spread its nasty self into my lymph system. He then walked me through his recommended treatment protocol and my likely medical schedule for the months to follow. There was so much and it was difficult to remember it all. But how Dr. Makhoul closed our initial meeting I will never forget.

He said to me: “I want you to trust me with your medical care, and know that I’m going to give you my very best to cure your cancer. What I need from you is to work in partnership with me. Your job is to focus on your mind, your attitude and your spiritual approach to the fight. This cancer will require both of us doing our very best, giving 110%.”

I left his office that day knowing what I was in charge of. Dr. Makhoul would take charge of the conventional medicine for my body. I would be in charge of my mental state, my attitude, and my outlook on life and the cancer. Dr. Makhoul empowered me to own and perfect the “medicine” of my mind.

********************

Some call it Mind-Body Medicine. Others call it Psychoneuroimmunology. Bottom line . . . it’s the study of how the mind, thoughts attitudes and beliefs affect the body and your physical well-being.

Do not be confused. This is not alternative medicine. Instead, it is often referred to as complementary medicine, or integrated medicine – techniques that are used WITH conventional medicine.

The list of what has been referred to as mind-body medicine is endless – guided imagery, deep breathing exercises, relaxation therapy, acupuncture, yoga, biofeedback, tai chi, meditation, and much more. All of these techniques are designed to help the body and mind relax, to enjoy times of inner calmness and freedom from obsessing thoughts. They can also serve as a conscious commitment to direct your energies toward health and healing, rather than obsessing with the negative circumstances of life.

My friend Laura, a cancer survivor, shared with me the great sense of power over disease she felt through guided imagery. In her practice she would imagine a battle going on between her body and the cancer cells, and would picture Pac-Man characters chasing and eating and destroying the cancer. For Laura, she believes this was a magical tool in her battle to defeat what was a very aggressive cancer that has now been in remission for several years.

For me, I was trained in Mindfulness meditation in 2004. Some have described it as the art of stillness, sitting quietly and observing without judgment or evaluation. Since I began meditation, I’ve found it to be incredibly helpful in creating a sense of calm in my life, alleviating stress, reducing pain, accepting what cannot be changed (but still trying to change what is possible), giving up anger and frustration over inconveniences, appreciating solitude and quiet, and so much more. I’m a believer in it, so glad that I was trained and practiced before cancer entered my life. It’s mental mastery, freedom from restless and negative thinking.

How do we make “mind-body focus” work for us? It has to become a part of your daily life practice, a natural habit, not dependent on the day’s events. No doubt, some days are easier than others to pay attention to the connection between mind and body, to carve out time to master the art of this connection. But we have to remain loyal to the practice, during the good, the bad and the ugly.

Finding a daily exercise that creates a sense of peace and tranquility – you can’t go wrong. Inner peace creates outer peace. I’m a big fan, consider myself still in training, and highly recommend everyone find some avenue for relaxation, finding a place of calm, the complementary techniques of mind and body medicine.

The mind is everything. What you think you become.

Buddha

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A few books and DVDs that have been helpful to me:

Return to Wholeness: A Mind/Body Approach to Healing Cancer

Led by world-renowned wellness doctor Deepak Chopra, M.D. along with psychologist Stephanie Simonton Atchley, founder of the Behavioral Medicine Program at the UAMS Rockefeller Cancer Institute.

http://www.cancervisualization.com/

Jon Kabat-Zinn is Professor of Medicine emeritus at the University of Massachusetts Medical School, where he was founding executive director of the Center for Mindfulness in Medicine, Health Care, and Society, and founder (in 1979) and former director of its world-renowned Stress Reduction Clinic. He is internationally known for his work as a scientist, writer, and meditation teacher engaged in bringing mindfulness into the mainstream of medicine and society.

In 2004 I studied his method of meditation at the UAMS Center on Aging. To find out more about Jon Kabat-Zinn: http://www.mindfulnesscds.com/author.html

Two books by Kabat-Zinn that are the core of his mindfulness meditation:

Full Catastrophe Living: Using the Wisdom of Your Body and Mind to Face Stress, Pain & Illness

Wherever You Go, There You Are: Mindfulness Meditation in Everyday Life

CDs by Jon Kabat-Zinn can be purchased form his web site:

http://www.mindfulnesscds.com/index.html

His books can be purchased or ordered from your local bookstore.

A Tribute To Hair - With or Without It

2011-03-05T12:53:00.000-06:00

Yesterday was a mini-celebration of sorts as it became necessary to buy a hairbrush to manage my new short locks. While the whiskery mane has slowly been growing back, it’s been so darned short, making it easy to manage with only my fingers – until the past several days. A hairbrush became very much in need. Yeehaw! So yesterday I drove to the Walgreens store and painstakingly shopped for a brush.

My new brush is shiny red, a very stunning hairbrush for someone like me. And as I sat on my sofa last night, I looked back at my entire escapade with hair this past year.

This is how my hair used to look before chemo. There wasn't anything stunning about it, except that it was mine and I was quite used to it. Like all women, I complained about it, wish I had somebody else's hair, that is until my hair would be obliterated by Adriamycin, a.k.a. the “red devil." It only took about two weeks for red devil chemo to do its dirty work on my hair, while cleansing my body of the cancer.

This is a photo taken in my courtyard, the morning my hair really began falling out in big clumps, 20 March 2010. My dear friend Beth came to my rescue, as she did so many times this past year. She brought over her “hair scissors” and helped lesson the pain by just cutting the long locks off. When we finished, she honestly told me she thought I looked younger. Nice friends say things like that to hair-challenged friends like me.

This was me a few weeks later, with a completely naked head, wearing my pink pajamas from Susan, trying to smile while knowing I look like a freakazoid from another planet. Losing my hair and being bald was a big loss, a very devastating feeling some days. I think that's especially true when you’re a woman.

This is my first real fancy outing – the Oxford American’s Best of the South Awards Gala. I was doing my best to feel elegant wearing a black floppy hat on my head, a gift from my friend MaryKay who now lives in China. The hat made me feel like I was wearing fairy wings, but it would be Tim and Morgan Freeman who led me to believe I was the most beautiful girl in the room that night. We enjoyed our time with him so much, especially a conversation to always be remembered about life and bucket lists . . . "Have you found joy in your life? Has your life brought joy to others? "

I became the perpetual shopper of wigs, never finding what I wanted, never satisfied that I had found the perfect rug to hide the nakedness on my head.

I only had one request to wear a wig, not a hat. Allyson and my Mom asked me to wear a wig for Allyson's college graduation. This is me wearing the wig at Mizzou's graduation. Only a few hours, at a party with Allyson and friends and family, I would totally scare one mom to death because my wig was hanging halfway off my head, and I didn't know it. I hated that wig! To wear a wig or not to wear a wig is a very personal decision for everyone who goes through this. I simply hated the wigs, felt much more comfortable in the hats.

As time went by, it was the cancer that really weighed on my mind, not the hair loss. It would be later that I would attempt to have some fun with being bald. Here I am enjoying my blue beehive hairdo, with many thanks to my crazy friend Gary who adorned me with several funny wigs enjoyed by the girls and me.

In August, I was gently nudged by a dear friend to take off the hats. He told me I looked healthy without them, that the hats reminded him of the cancer that I had successfully managed to kick its butt. So I did. I took off the hats and I never looked back.

The old hair was brown, usually cut at the shoulders. And it never changed from the time I was a born – always baby fine with very little body. My new hair – well it’s grayish, a much different texture, much thicker; thick enough to have “bed head” which I’ve never had before.

Yesterday I bought a hairbrush, and right now that $5.95 purchase is probably the most special thing I own. It’s my red wonder brush.

Give me a head with hair, long beautiful hair
Shining, gleaming, streaming, flaxen, waxen.
Give me down to there, hair, shoulder length or longer.
Here baby, there momma, everywhere, daddy, daddy
Hair, flow it, show it
Long as God can grow it, my hair . . .

Continued Awareness about Inflammatory Breast Cancer

2011-03-03T19:55:00.000-06:00

I’m not a big fan of Dr. Oz, probably because I’m not a daytime television watcher and that’s when his show is on – I think. I also worry about takeaways from his show I hear other claim, simplistic things like drinking cherry juice every day will keep you from getting cancer. Not true, but it may be more about viewer interpretation versus what the famed medical talk show hosts actually promotes. He's probably a great guy, but again, I’ve never watched his show.

However, I was told this week by a friend that Dr. Oz recently discussed the misunderstanding of breast cancer, more specifically the myth that all breast cancers present themselves as a lump.

I did a little research and found that on February 3, Dr. Oz had a guest on his show to discuss the many myths surrounding cancer – the name of this episode being “The Biggest Lies You’ve Ever Been Told About Cancer.”

One of his guests was Dr. Dara Richardson-Heron, Executive Director of Susan G. Komen For The Cure of Greater New York and a 13-year breast cancer survivor.

Regarding Lie #3 The Only Place To Check For Breast Cancer Is Your Breast

Regarding Breast Cancer Prevention: Dr. Richardson strongly advocates physical activity and stress management. This decreases your risk of developing breast cancer and other cancers. She also advocates self-awareness, mammography, and prevention. Dr. Richardson mentioned that getting Vitamin D is very important for breast cancer prevention, and can reduce your risk by as much as 50%. If you don't get it from moderate sun exposure, you should take at least 1000 IU of Vitamin D a day. She stressed that you need the active form of Vitamin D in Vitamin D3.

Regarding Inflammatory Breast Cancer: Dr. Richardson said, “There’s a very aggressive type of breast cancer called inflammatory breast cancer that does not present a lump at all. In fact what you find is a change in the skin, it’s dimpling similar to the skin of an orange, thickening of the skin and dimpling of the skin. This is so important because one it is very, very aggressive and the big part is a lot of doctors don’t recognize this and women are treated as they have a breast infection and that is horrible and I urge every woman if you get an irritation in your breast that does not go away you must go an see your doctor. Even say ‘can this be inflammatory breast cancer’, use the words because this is so deadly it is more common in African American Women and it’s a very, very serious condition women need to know about”.

I’m sharing this with all of you dear readers, especially women. Remember:

There’s more than one kind of breast cancer, and the IBC-kind isn’t packaged up in a lump.
Mammograms usually don’t detect Inflammatory Breast Cancer.
Make sure your doctor is aggressive with an ultrasound or biopsy in the event your breast becomes swollen, warm, itches, changes colors or the texture of the skin or areola begins to thicken. And watch for nipple discharge or retraction too.

Get in touch with your body, including your breasts.

Oh yeah -- P.S. I don't want to sound like a nag, but have you had your Vitamin D levels checked recently?

Waiting for the Big D – A Complete Pain in the Legs

2011-02-28T08:37:00.000-06:00

This week I was back under the care of UAMS and CARTI. On Tuesday I had a follow-up visit with Dr. Gardner, my radiologist. All is good, my skin irritation from the radiation treatment has almost totally healed, so I was officially released from CARTI’s care. While I love all the folks at CARTI, I am most pleased to be discharged and hopeful that I will never have to return.

On Friday I was in touch with my oncologist who called with the results of my blood work from last week – and it’s still not good. Vitamin D levels continue to be a challenge for this cancer-stricken body.

For many years, most of us received adequate vitamin D levels by drinking milk, a dose of exposure to the sun, and possibly taking a multi-vitamin each day. However, new research revels that most of us, as many as 85%, are vitamin D deficient.

What is it that makes vitamin D so important? In a nutshell, the big D gives each of us a better chance of preventing many major illnesses including cancer. Other diseases – heart disease, hypertension, arthritis, chronic pain, depression, inflammatory bowel disease, obesity, premenstrual syndrome, muscular weakness, fibromyalgia, Crohn’s disease, multiple sclerosis and autoimmune Illness

I’m anxious to get this D-train on track as I’m a patient-in-waiting for Reclast, a once-a-year infusion to help correct the osteoporosis, a result of the chemotherapy. Pain in my bones remains, especially the legs, even though bone density tests show I’ve suffered bone loss in my hips and lower back too. They don’t bother me – the legs do, however. Reclast has been billed as the new wonder drug for legs like mine, supposedly the answer to get back them feeling better and stronger. But Reclast will not properly absorb into the bones unless the body has sufficient vitamin D levels. That means my bones still hurt while I await for the this dang vitamin to do it’s job.

Compound all of this with the fact that a deficiency of vitamin D or an inability to utilize vitamin D leads to further weakening and softening of the bones, which equals MORE bone pain.

Goodbye Cancer! Hello chronic bone pain!

Let me put this dilemma into more of a medical perspective. Most people who take a vitamin D supplement consume 1,000, maybe 2,000 units a day. For me, I’ve been taking 50,000 units each week, every Monday, and my vitamin D levels are still terribly low. So as of Friday, the good doctor has bumped me up to 100,000 units a week for the next two months. And yes, there are side-effects from taking such a large dose of vitamin D.

Waiting, waiting, waiting. . . . I don’t do this very well, and I’m ready to get my bones back to normal.

HAVE YOU HAD YOUR VITAMIN D LEVELS CHECKED LATELY? If not, get it done. Call the doctor this week! Take care of yourself.

The Ongoing Perils of Chemo Brain

2011-02-21T08:29:00.000-06:00

It’s been written about, discussed by many, and a topic of this blog on several occasions. However, the other day I realized – I still suffer from chemo brain.

This is not fiction. Chemo brain, sometimes called “chemo fog” is real. It’s the much discussed, but poorly understood side effect of chemotherapy treatment – misunderstood by everyone who has NOT taken chemo. For those of us who are chemo graduates – we understand it all too well.

It’s been described as an inefficiency of certain cognitive functions related to cancer treatment – i.e. chemotherapy. The primary symptom is inefficient memory retrieval, specifically losing your train of thought, a mental block on words or names or numbers. It can mean being distracted or having trouble multitasking. There also seems to be a reduction in how much information a person can process at one time, similar to attention deficit disorder. Those with chemo brain are slower to do things and it takes more mental effort to do almost everything.

The good news: Reasoning, problem solving, basic skills and talent are not affected.

How has chemo brain affected me? It’s usually words. They are on the tip of my tongue. I know what I want to say, it’s right there on the tip of my tongue. Honestly! I can almost feel the word, touch the word. But I fail. I have zero recall.

Today I could not remember the name “mouthwash.” I could only come up with dishwashing detergent. As we all know, they are not the same.

Last week I went completely brain dead trying to remember the last name of a longtime acquaintance. His first name was easy. I could see his face and knew everything else about him, but I could not remember his last name without the help of Tim. He and a few others, especially work colleagues, have become like seeing-eye dogs for me, except they help me with my memory lapses.

The other day I was introducing two friends – one who recently moved to Little Rock from Texas, an education specialist. The other was a college friend who’s returned home from Florida, taking a new position at the UAMS Center on Aging. As I tried to give some background about each of them to the other, I had a complete memory lapse – completely lost my train of thought. I could not remember Dennie’s specialty, which is MEMORY! SHE IS A MEMORY SPECIALIST!!!! If it hadn’t been so tragic it would have been hysterical. Well, it actually was as the three of us burst into uncontrollable laughter! Thank you, my dear friends, for laughing with me, not at me.

Surely nobody with chemo brain is proud of this after-effect from cancer treatment. In fact, if patients are not honest about this post-chemo syndrome, if they try to hide the challenges faced by the lack of memory recall, it could have a negative impact on so many lifestyle matters, including employment.

For me, the answer to chemo brain has been this – tell those who love me, who I trust to take care of me as I continue to make brain progress.

How long does it last? Chemo brain usually goes away. However, there are a few who seem to be plagued with it forever. In studies with breast cancer patients that required chemotherapy, half of them had gotten better one year after treatment had ended – about half had not. So, the answer is: physicians cannot say how long this condition lasts. It just depends on a variety of factors, especially high-dose chemo versus standard-dose.

I’ve done some reading, two very good books on the market today: ChemoBrain: How Cancer Therapies Can Affect Your Mind (Ellen Clegg) and Your Brain After Chemo (Dr. Dan Silverman, M.D., Ph.D.).

It appears that there are several things that can contribute to ridding the cancer survivor of chemo brain – energy conservation, good sleep, mental stimulation and physical exercise, all of them a part of my daily agenda. Let’s hope I’m successful in making these things happen each day.

So remember . . . If a family member, or a friend or a colleague has had to take chemotherapy drugs, be kind. Those who have endured chemotherapy can retain their functionality, but there's a cost and effort when it comes to memory and recall.

Learning More About Breast Cancer Risks & Ongoing Research

2011-02-19T14:52:00.000-06:00

My church, Pulaski Heights United Methodist, has a wonderful ministry called Cancer Friends. It’s a support group led by lay members of the church who have either had cancer or have been through the cancer journey with a loved one. Members support one another with prayers, telephone calls, notes and cards and other assistance. Cancer Friends is for church member, and non-members too; in other words, anybody is welcome to join. Programs include a monthly support group for those battling cancer, and a regularly scheduled luncheon that features an informative guest speaker.

This past week Dr. Suzanne Klimberg, my breast oncology surgeon at UAMS, was the guest speaker at the Cancer Friends luncheon. And was she ever informative. Dr. Klimberg is Director of the Breast Cancer Program at the Winthrop Rockefeller Cancer Institute at UAMS. She’s the best of both worlds – a brilliant physician committed to healing, and a patient mentor who provides emotional support along the way. I could not have been more fortunate to be under her care throughout my own battle with cancer.

I’m going to try to recap a few things she shared with us this past week, as it was very good information for all women to know regarding breast cancer risks, prevention and new treatments.

About Risk Factors for Breast Cancer:

According to Dr. Klimberg, there are several major risk factors that can increase the chances of getting breast cancer – life-style related risk factors vs. genetic or physical characteristics that cannot be changed. The top lifestyle risk factors Dr. Klimberg discussed should be top-of-mind for every woman.

Alcohol consumption: The use of alcohol is clearly linked to an increased risk of developing breast cancer. The risk increases with the amount of alcohol consumed. Compared with non-drinkers, women who consume one alcoholic drink a day have a very small increase in risk. Those who have 2 or more drinks daily almost double their risk of developing breast cancer. As Dr. Klimberg said, if you drink alcohol, drink in moderation.

Hormone therapy after menopause: Dr. Klimberg clearly believes the research linking hormone replacement therapy with an increased risk for breast cancer. While HRT used to be the standard, she said that women should consider alternatives to HRT such as new medicines that can help with hot flashes or bone density issues. It was quite obvious that she is not a fan of hormone replacement therapy.

Being overweight or obese: Being overweight or obese has been found to increase breast cancer risk, especially for women after menopause. Before menopause your ovaries produce most of your estrogen, and fat tissue produces a small amount of estrogen. After menopause (when the ovaries stop making estrogen), most of a woman's estrogen comes from fat tissue. Having more fat tissue after menopause can increase your chance of getting breast cancer by raising estrogen levels. In addition to body weight, evidence is growing that physical activity in the form of exercise reduces breast cancer risk.

About ongoing research and improvements in breast cancer care:

Preventing Lymphedema: Klimberg and her UAMS team, with funding provided by the Tenenbaum Breast Cancer Research Foundation, have developed a new surgical method (ARM, or Axillary Reverse Mapping) to prevent lymphedema after breast cancer surgery. Oftentimes described by women as worse than the mastectomy, it is a swelling that is difficult to treat and caused by faulty drainage of the lymph nodes. Some studies report the incidence rate of lymphedema in the arm and hand as high as 56%. The new technique evaluates the ways in which fluid drains through the lymph node system in the arm using an injection of blue dye. The dye is used to map the drainage of the arm. Mapping the drainage of the arm decreases the chances of unintended disruption of the lymph node system during surgery and reduces the risk of developing swelling in the arm," Klimberg said. UAMS was the first to study lymph node drainage in the arm and it is now using the ARM procedure as standard procedure for breast cancer surgery. Dr. Klimberg now conducts training seminars on the procedure for breast centers throughout the country.

Spit for the Cure: The brainchild of Klimberg and Dr. Susan Kadlubar, Ph.D., Spit For The Cure is a breast cancer research study conducted by UAMS and the Fay Boozman College of Public Health that hopes to identify factors that put women at increased risk for breast cancer. They also hope to find out more about why some women respond to treatment and others do not. In partnership with the Susan G. Komen Arkansas Affiliate, there are now more than 10,000 Arkansas women who are helping to pioneer this research through the simple donation of spit to provide DNA samples. If you want to contribute to your own saliva samples for this important research, it only takes 10 to 15 minutes of your time. More information can be found by clicking here.

Tears for Life: Tears for Life was created in September 2008 as collaboration between researchers at the University of Arkansas for Medical Sciences and MBA students at the University of Arkansas' Walton College of Business. The partnership has an exclusive license for a patent-pending technology from UAMS to develop an innovative, non-invasive, and convenient screening tool that can detect breast cancer using proteins found in women's tears. These protein patterns create a multiple marker "barcode" that accurately identifies the presence of breast cancer in the body. Our vision is that the test will make breast cancer screening easier and more accessible for women, resulting in higher screening rates, earlier diagnosis and treatment, increased survival rates, and reduced treatment costs for patients and insurers. You can find out more information about this research by clicking here.

There is amazing progress being made and research going on with breast cancer prevention and treatment, especially at our own UAMS. The presentation by Dr. Klimberg made me feel much more optimistic about the future.

For anyone living in Central Arkansas wanting more information about PHUMC’s Cancer Friends program, click here. This is yet another wonderful cancer support opportunity right here in our community.

My Cancerversary. I’m a One-Year Survivor!

2011-02-17T06:17:00.000-06:00

Today is my cancerversary!

A year ago today my doctor called, and it was not the expected “you are fine” phone call. Instead, it would become the day “cancer” would come into my life – a terrifying moment, a day every cancer survivor forever remembers.

In the cancer community, you typically say that you’re a survivor from the day you received your diagnosis. So, I am counting today as my anniversary date – or my cancerversary as some say.

I know, I know! It’s the five-year celebration that allows you to really take a deep sigh of relief. But this one-year celebration lifts my spirits immensely.

Today I will celebrate enduring one of the toughest years of life - living with, through and beyond cancer. A little champagne tonight, with a toast to my medical team, family and friends, colleagues and new acquaintances who lifted me up and surrounded me in care and love and immense support. They helped make this tough year much more bearable.

One year later: I’ve endured four months of chemotherapy and twenty-five radiation treatments – medical miracles that can truly obliterate cancer cells. In four months I went under the knife three times – once to remove my breasts, twice to give me what I call “my party favors” from UAMS for having to endure the heartache of breast cancer. Pain in my legs persists from the osteoporosis created by the chemotherapy, and next week I’ll see a lymphedema specialist to help me with the swelling in my right arm. My hair is quite short, and a new shade of gray – but hey, I have hair!. And each morning I swallow a handful of pills, one of them to be my medicine of choice for the next four years.

The end result – I’m alive, I survived and I don’t have cancer! My UAMS and CARTI teams have kicked cancer’s butt!

Last night’s fortune cookie: "Times long ago will present a special treasure to you.”

Obviously that treasure is life, and I will celebrate the gift each day, along with 12 million other survivors in the USA.

Here’s to one year, and counting . . .

Making The Moment Count

2011-02-13T12:41:00.000-06:00

This past week I wrote about doing something fun for YOU every day. A few days later a friend writes to me and says she just doesn’t have the time to do something fun each day. Like me, she works, has kids, very involved in the community, and has a pretty jam-packed life of responsibility. She challenged me to redefine what I meant by this.

Well honey, I meant what I said, so let me say it again:

“Keep loving life. Do SOMETHING every day that makes you smile and feels good. If this hasn’t been your routine, then change it! I did! Do something fun for YOU each day while you have cancer – and make a list of everything you want to do when the cancer is over. And when that day arrives, keep on doing the fun stuff. That’s what life is all about.”

Doing something fun doesn’t require having cancer or surviving cancer. And it doesn't require plane tickets or an expensive shopping spree. It’s the little things that can be fun, if you know how to fully embrace and celebrate the moment.

When I was in meditation training years ago, we learned how to eat with mindfulness – recognizing the food we were about to eat, appreciating its color and texture, savoring each morsel, really tasting what it was inside our mouth, expanding the food palate. That may sound strange, but it was the art of practicing enlightenment, appreciating what is before you, finding joy and happiness in every moment. We practiced with an orange, then moved on to a complete meal.

A few things I’ve done lately, reminding me that each moment can feel extraordinary . . .

Enjoyed a wonderful dinner with friends at the new French bistro in my neighborhood.
Cancelled an unimportant meeting, and instead watched a Christmas move – the 1938 version of “A Christmas Carol.” It was terrific, even though it was February.
Found a new recipe for one of Tim’s favorite food groups – Gruyere cheese. Today I’m making it for his birthday – a caramelized onion cheese fondue.
Enjoyed the winter weather. I relished being stuck at home, took tons of photos of my puppies playing in the snow, and kept a fire in my fireplace for a week. What a treat!
Researched and created a detailed itinerary for a history trip through Virginia. That's half the fun. The other half will be making the trip!
Worked on my genealogy and discovered that my ggggg-grandfather was the first republican chief of the Choctaw Indian Nation. WOW! I’m now wondering . . . is there an organization like Daughters of the Choctaw Nation?
Went to a small gas station outside of town and had lunch. Very good home-cooked food!
Stopped at a new bakery on Kavanaugh Boulevard. Bought a sugar cookie and a cup of coffee, then sat down and enjoyed ten minutes of time with myself.
Mailed a copy of a book – There’s No Place Like Hope – to a friend of a friend who is battling Inflammatory Breast Cancer.
Enjoyed a coffee outing with another friend battling breast cancer. We shared bad hair stories - but laughed about each one of them.
Read through a great food blog by a young woman who was once my summer intern.
Celebrated with colleagues after a long but successful week of work.
Created a terrarium for a dear friend.
Discovered a new musical combo – Sweet Talk Radio – and downloaded their songs.
Visited with another longtime friend by phone, wishing she lived closer, but so thankful we’ve stayed connected for all these years.
Went to a cooking demonstration at my favorite neighborhood kitchen shop.
Organized my laundry room so I can become a committed recycler.
Read a book by one of my favorite authors – Joan Anderson.
Made plans for some upcoming special events at the Contemporary Art Museum/St. Louis, Allyson’s new employer.
Scanned some old family photos, and then had prints made.
Listened to my repertoire of songs from my favorite musical group, Over The Rhine.
Enjoyed a late-night dinner at Tim’s favorite health club – International House of Pancakes. Took Anna-Lee and her friend McKenzie with us. Too much fun!
Every day I’m enjoying a walk with my puppies. Rollo may be a blind corgi, but he’s super on a leash and loves his daily walk.
Yesterday I had a haircut and consult on what to do with short gray hair.
Went through all my Christmas cards again. Saved the ones with photographs.
And much more . . .

Some might think this is a very uneventful list. But for me, the small things have become very meaningful moments in my life. Call it whatever you may - a new lease on life, a new appreciation for the small stuff. But I’m finding extraordinary value in the small nuggets provided to me each day.

Distraction can be your enemy. Don’t let the present slip away. Don’t wait for disease to hit before you savor the moment.

When every moment counts, I feel like the queen, a woman of real purpose.

I love this photoshopped print of Queen Elizabeth with one of her Corgis. I do love my corgis!

Advice For Fighting The Beast, Whatever the Beast Might Be

2011-02-10T08:02:00.000-06:00

Yesterday a dear friend called. This past week one of her employees was diagnosed with breast cancer. She is a strong woman, but very frightened.

Breast cancer is now stalking another remarkable woman.

My friend asked for some advice regarding a few good books, and a few nuggets of wisdom to pass along. So here it goes . . .

My own advice for fighting cancer:

Fight the beast with every ounce of energy that you have. As Winston Churchill said, “Never Give In, Never, Never, Never.”
Keep company with family and friends who make you smile. Their love will bring you a sense of calm and keep your spirits high. Conversely, put out the “go away” doormat for brainless morons who bring you down or who have little regard that you are in the battle of your life. Make them go home and keep them far, far away.
Laugh and laugh hard. Yes, cancer is serious business, but laughter is very serious too. It is a deeply spiritual emotion that may very well carry you through this terribly tough time. Watch funny movies, read funny books, and stay close with funny friends.
Always remember – a disease like cancer does not have to take away your soul. It is only a physical malady and it should not consume who you are inside. Remain true to your core.
Even when disease inflicts havoc on your body, mental strength can carry you through. Beating a life-challenging disease requires a Herculean spirit. If strength is a challenge, seek out The Mighty who can help you unearth it. It can likely be found in a posse of other survivors and cancer warriors.
Hang with God every day for He will provide comfort and stability. "The Lord will guide you continually."
While God is good, it will be wise doctors who heal. Make sure your cancer doctor is the best. If she’s not, get rid of her and find a better doctor. This is your life and it’s no time to worry about hurting the feelings of a physician. You and your life deserve the best.
Learn to meditate. I used to close my eyes and imagine myself at a beautiful lake I once saw at the top of a lovely mountain in Colorado, in the summer. In times of fear or panic, it was that lake that would bring my heart and mind back to tranquility.
If you live alone, find a good dog. There is nothing that will give you love and companionship like a loyal dog.
Keep loving life. Do SOMETHING every day that makes you smile and feels good. If this hasn’t been your routine, then change it! Do something fun for YOU each day – and make a list of everything you want to do when the cancer is over. And when that day arrives, keep on doing the fun stuff. That’s what life is all about.

These were just my own rules – maybe yours will be different. A friend asked, so I'm sharing.

If you’re fighting cancer, or heart disease or depression, a lost job or a divorce, create your own "rules to live by" for getting through the tough times. Without a mantra for life, the beast can take control, whatever the beast might be.