Here I am in a real world....

Freakonomics

2014-08-08T22:10:00.000-07:00

Freakonomics reminds me of the book I read long time a ago and somehow it becomes part of my life.

Since one lunch casual conversation about selling drugs, I found out about the podcast of Freakonomics from one of my colleagues. It felt like found out some precious gift in your saving.

Recently, another thing touched me a lot, another book, the magic way to organize your life (no sure which is the right translation). However, I felt something changed in my blood. Especially, after reading the blog posts from people who implemented what in the book to their real life, something small is growing. Although I don't think I am a messy person, some of my friends, such dd and other people will always complain about my desk. After applying several techniques of cleaning desk, clothes draws, and books, I could start to feel life from the room. Thanks very much for teaching me in my life.

Transit of Venus

2012-06-05T20:46:00.001-07:00

Last night, I was at home trying to find the binocular. Since a few months ago, I got this information from National Geography, I marked it on my calendar of this events. I love astronomical phenomena since I was a child. This morning, after I found the binocular, research result of the safety disappointed me. It is not safe at all to use sunglasses on top of the binocular. It can only block certain light. The remaining part can still cause severe damage. I felt sad and assumed that the only thing I can do is to read news and watch the video on line.

Dramatically, five minutes later, I got an email from school, the Physics & Astronomy Department will set up three solar telescopes for public viewing. Around 3:00pm, I can not sit in lab and went tot the Bell Tower to check it out. They were not there.

Two hours later, I tried again. This time, out of my expectation, I saw a huge line. There are lots of student even having they own eclipse glasses. Some of them even tried to use X-ray films. They were all so excited, discussing about it. Finally, I got a chance to look through this telescope to look at the Venus. Unfortunately, I can not take a picture from the telescope since there were still lots of students waiting to see it this special phenomena.

The secret world of Arrietty

2012-05-01T16:39:00.001-07:00

This movie released in Japan in 2010. The reason it attracted me is that it released in US market on my birthday in 2012. From the picture, I can feel the peace theme as usual as Yonebayashi san's style.

I finished this movie on a quite tired day. However, it gave me fresh air and peace energy. Although the story is quite old fashion, speed is slow, and there is no fancy CG, the peaceful country style and the beauty of the spirit shrined the movie as the famous movie "My Neighbor Totoro".

Maybe this world really exist this species. We are just too busy to stop, listen, watch, and find them.

My mystical orchid

2012-05-01T12:06:00.002-07:00

Orchid is one of my favorite flowers. Some says it is hard to maintain, while others opposites. I got this chance to own one. However, due to the long distance shipping, after I separated it from the package, I found some flower buds dropped down struggling to blossom as the rest of them. In the end, they still did not make it. Then, the situation got worse. The flowers on the whole branch started to dry and fall down. I thought I might lose this stem.

Due to the internship in another city, I came home every week to water them as the instruction indicates. However, the weather in Riverside is as what it suppose to be - dessert. One week, after I got home, the first thing I saw is the other branch totally cracked and lingered along the supporting stick. Sad is the only word to express my feeling. This is the last health stem. Due to the dry and hot weather, the flowers on the branch became the burden of it due to the lack of water . Eventually, the branch lost the fight again the gravity and paid the price of life to support the flowers. I hope I have a chance to help them. However, all I can do is to use a small clip to rest the stem on a supporting stick and gave them some water.

I always believe all plants just as animals have their own spirit and strength to fight for life. The following week, I saw it gave up some leaves, all flowers, and drained up the branch, to provide new life. A small branch slowly stretched out from the middle part of the stem, right below the golden dried branch. While the branch with empty flowers on the other stem grew some small flower buds. The new form of life restarted.

I was amazed by the speed of recovering and growth, the spirit of life, just like phoenix's nirvana and rebirth out of ashes. Sometimes, when we were at a cross road, we need to learn to give up somethings and be patient.

Special Movies

2011-11-05T00:25:00.000-07:00

This movie has been sit in my waiting list for a long time. Until a few days ago, finally I got a chance to finish it. I was amazed by the director - Nicolas Winding Refn and the actor - Ryan Gosling. For such a simple store, just above love, violence, gangsters, and driving, However, they could do it in such way that as slow as possible and as beautiful as possible, especially Ryan so calm, quite, and those killing smile. For the color, I felt a little awkward which might be done on purpose for the special rhythm. After I finish this movie, a strong feeling of watching all Ryan's other movies remains for a long time. He seems to have such power to make you feel calm by just watching his eyes.

Dolphin is one of my favorite animal. I remember when people ask me if you have a power to change yourself into other form of life, what you would like to be. Dolphin will definitely be my answer. I like this movie not just because of Dolphin but all the spirit from the kids. Somehow, only child has such strong will to keep doing things what he think is right. As adults, sometimes, we just lost ourselves and impede by so call "common sense". The result is we give up too soon. While on the other hand, we are trying so hard on something that not suppose to be stubborn. We need to learn to find a balance for ourselves, also for other people.

Return to Blogger

2011-10-07T11:51:00.000-07:00

When I was kid, I used to like writing, especially novels and random staff for my life. All of suddenly, I found it becomes really hard for me to write, not just for paper, also for just daily life thoughts. Technology really shortens my attention. We have cellphones that I can write down anything on twitter or social media. The desire to well sort and write down my thoughts keeps been interrupted and stopped. It is a really bad habit.

Talking about writing down thoughts, most of people told me it helps a lot when you have some great idea that you do not want it to just losing in the wind. You need to write them down in a notebook and keeps reminding yourself and realize it. The first thought, we have google doc, TBD, task, all kinds of technology, why do we need a notebook. It turns out we indeed need it. Or life will just like running water. Without carefully planning and reorganizing, sometimes, I do waste my time.

Another thoughts comes from recent research experience. Due to the computer science major, almost everything in my area evolves really fast. Sometimes, documentation becomes a burden. But documentation is the only way to communicate with developer and user. So the result is forum. It seems hard for me to describe my problem in a simple way that other people can understand. I need more practices I think. The better way to analogy or metaphor your work into a simple scenario needs thoughtful insight and well understanding the hinge of your problem.

It is always nice to find out your weakness and always hard to keep track of it and improving yourself. I would like to use this method to remind me and keep working on it.

Nobel Peace Prize

2010-10-08T10:53:00.001-07:00

I was quite excited about the news that the Nobel Peace Prize has given to Xiaobo Liu this morning. After I got to lab, on Twitter and my email box, there were full of congratulation messages and joy for the right choice of Nobel Prize Committee. Also, another news was about the China's official condemnation and disappointed comments from people both in China and outside.

I tried to write something down in my Chinese blog. At the time, I tried to save my draft, I found that lots of words are sensitive words I can't use in my blog. Moreover, I can't publish my blog directly before it is passed the censor. Of course, this is the normal way how Chinese government uses to avoid public consensus.

This might be the first example that a nation or the official government is not honored about its citizen won the first Nobel Prize. Even some Chinese immigrants had won Nobel Prize but in the sense of nationality, they are not Chinese. This is the first Nobel Prize for Chinese people. There is no flower or applause but the forbidden words and expression. Disappointment can't express how Chinese people feel now. Even worse, if you search the Nobel Peace Prize, there is no directly positive news in China. Chinese government might blockade the news.

A few days ago, the blackmail behavior of Chinese government made many people scorned about such a huge and powerful rising government would use this kind of scheme to make other people agree with its opinion on its human right issue. It reminds me the bullies in middle school. If it is a common sense that this behavior is defective for the development of children, then why those governors are not able to see this.

Xiaobo Liu might not be known by most of the later 80s' and 90s' generation because of lack of information resources and that period of history is distorted by the official. In the long time, my history teacher told me that most of history is written by the current authority, and they normally leave the evidences which will benefit them. This is the reason truth is berried under somewhere no one is able to find it. The results might be lost of ability to distinguish right or wrong, although for some case, the line between them is blur.

Most people expected that Nobel Peace Prize is able to give Chinese people power to fast its sluggish reform in human rights, and it is a very challenge to Chinese government. It might trigger curiosity and interest for normal Chinese to dig out his records and that special history. It might arouse ordinary people to start to fight for their rights and make the Charter 08 more publicly. It might provide a breach of China's restricted sensor system. However, what will happen next fully depends on how millions of ordinary people react to this and how much they would sacrifice for the freedom of right.

Key victory to same-sex marriage

2010-08-05T09:15:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, a federal judge changed the history of gay rights who struck down a California ban on same-sex marriages as unconstitutional. This action might affect all over the country or even the world. Now the Propsition 8 moves to a higher court.

Although this success is not the final victory, it gives people hope after the Prop 8 passed in November 2008, which damped down gay right supporters . In comparison, I did not hear any news from China gay rights advocates. Even one of the famous blog writter turned to other topic. When it comes the time, people have the freedom of believe, they should have the freedom to express their nature.

World cup and the sun

2010-07-11T22:03:00.001-07:00

Walking out from the bar, I found the sky became blue and the sun came out. Everything shined in golden and bright color. Before I came to Santa Monica, I dreamed that I am able to watch sunset and sunrise whenever I want. Although I find out it might not be possible for the sunrise, for the bus service is not provided before 5am, the sunset would be possible. Don't need to beg for anyone to drive me to any place for just 10 minutes miracle or worry about my time schedule conflicted with others.

After coming back from "Cyrus" yesterday, I had a conversation with my roommate about the movies -- "before sunrise" and "before sunset". First, I want to talk about that special theater, it is located opposite to my office on the 2nd street. It is a small theater but only puts on independent movies and art house, not like normal commercial ones. I got this information from Nick on the first day of work. I guess we might like the same type of movie. For those two movies, they are two of my favorite movies in my life, which might be scorned by other people for greedy about romance or not real life. For me, they are real life, just like the movie itself from dream, novel to real life takes nice years.

I need to learn how to finding the center of my life in myself, the sun of my sky in my heart. Then there will be sunshine everyday even those I can't see the sun which is just there on the other side of the cloud or 10 miles away from my location.

love is ....

2010-07-11T21:57:00.000-07:00

Those cute pictures were love letters from a cute couple, which are widely spread to express what is love. Thanks for sharing with me. It made me smile as the sunshine in life in this cloudy day.

Need sunshine

2010-07-09T22:16:00.000-07:00

This is the second week at Santa Monica, a city supposed to be full of sunshine and sea view.
This is the second week that I did not stay in the sunshine in this city.
This is the second week of actually real work.
This is the second week began to receive friends' phone call from South Africa and China.
This is the second week left kaixin001.
This is the second week kept missing sending out the invitation letter to professors.
This is the second week ....
Talked with googler, began to understand their life status and understood what is the meaning between life and work. We could talk about economic statistical model, psychology test, agile programming, all the new technologies, families, cookings. Everyone seems to know what they want in life, which is a quite positive influence.

Miss sunshine and the favor of sun. Before I came here, I thought I could watch sunset and sunrise whenever I want. However, current situation made me homesick....

North California travel

2010-05-16T11:32:00.000-07:00

The trip for North California, I am always expecting.
Still did not get my drive license, still not find a group to join to begin the adventure.
Still dreaming....

One day, I might be on the the Pacific Coast Highway, go to Yosemite National Park for its fantastic landscape and beautiful falls, Hearst Castle for one of the famous castle in America, though I might take long for me to be able to go those castles like in fairy tell in Europe , Napa Valley, the The birthplace of California wine as in the movie of 'Sideways' and San Fransisco, special culture, Victorian architecture, California Academy of Sciences museum and famous bay area and redwood.

uniform random generator

2010-04-12T08:49:00.000-07:00

The last interview asked about the random number generator. The problem is that given a uniform random generator which will generate random number from 0 to m-1, you need to come up with a uniform random generator from 0 to n-1 which n > m. I did the normal way as I started the C++, using

number = (rand() % (max - (min - 1))) + min.

However, the modular operation destroy the uniform distribution.
We need to make the distribution untouched. The interviewer told me that any math operation will destroy the distribution. Think about it carefully. I think he was wrong. There is a way to over come it and using arithmetic operations:

number = (rand() * (float(max - min) / RAND_MAX)) + min.

Another reason of not using modular is that in the pseudo random generator, it uses lower bits in the random value. However the reality is the lower bits are less random than higher bits. If you want a uniform distribution, it is not a good idea to use lower bits.

How to Train Your Dragon

2010-04-09T13:02:00.000-07:00

The side effect of watching this movie is to remind me the intimate feeling with pets. On Wed, a lot of friends get together and hang around. All of suddenly, we started to talk about pets which ringed the bell of Dandan and other pets I had before. This is a great movie, however a little bit too short. Even the story is simple, still worthy watching it, especially the feeling it brought you.

Here is the OST , quite great. They used an orchestra and quite a long of different music element. Enjoy it :)

The Marriage of Figaro

2010-02-28T20:18:00.000-08:00

The collaboration by Mozart and Da Ponte, "The Marriage of Figaro " is a comic opera, which gave me the thought that UCR's students are so great that there are people who can fulfill the ability of the soprano and baritone. Well the result was they adapted it into a play. They combined a lot of modern elements and music style, still quite amazing.

At night, when trying to talk with DD about the play, she did not remember we listen part of the opera when we were at college. Sad..... She can't share my joy.

Well, again confirmed that I need to learn English harder, it was quite difficult to understand them while they trying to talk with expression and kind of sing while talking. I guess if I did not know anything about it before I went to watch the play, it might ruin all my passion.

All right, English learning, you are on my urgent agenda now. Hope I can understand better next time.

Don't give up - google

2010-01-16T11:35:00.000-08:00

I am kind of surprised about the Google China's decision, because a lot of global enterprises, once they decided to enter the important emerging market of China, need to be ready to adapt to all kinds of invisible rules or laws, such as the censorship and taxation. I heard that one friend was curious about my attitude about it, and some lab mates discussed it in lab as well.

From my opinion, firstly, I have the same feeling with ZZ. Google China does not set up firmly and positive image in China, because of the scandal of plagiarism of the Chinese input product - Goolge pinyin. And as far as I known, Google China did not release any popular, useful products respect to Chinese market which can actually efficiently change Chinese user's surfing habits. And most of the things they did, according to a lot of people's eyes, just translate all the popular products into Chinese. But Google China still is one of the best dream working places for all computer science college students. Even though, a lot of them felt disappointed about those scandals comparing with its famous slogan - "Don't be evil".

As for the censorship, I remember a lot of web sites we can't get access. However, some of them might have cached page in Google search engine. That's the first time, I felt that there were still some people fighting against it. And I appreciated it. Now it announced to quit Chinese market. I don't know it is the sorrow of Chinese people or the giant company.

Last year, Chinese government enforcedly blocked a lot of Google's service during the insurrection of Urumqi and the anniversary of the Tiananmen Square event, as well as a lot of other websites, such as Facebook and Twitter. Even the e-mail services were sacrificed during certain period. As a company, facing those unfair situation will affect their efficiency of operation. But all the Chinese people are standing at your site.

China has more than 300 million people on-line everyday. If they can just get all the information from the filtered news or stories. The fairy tell - The emperor's new suit, might the most suitable description for the situation. I hope Chinese people would have more speech freedom, but there should be a way to give their channel to express. Right now the organism of Chinese government is kind of loss this function. Even though the media power is not the pivot of solving these problem, at least, it will arise public attention for those are still willing to devote themselves on the current Chinese situation.

Riverdance

2010-01-10T14:58:00.000-08:00

If only using one word to describe, it is fantastic. Quite incredible marvelous, the performance is. Although it does not include all the traditional sounds, still excellent for its dancing, orchestra and singing. All those three elements combines quite fluently. While I guess there is misunderstanding for Riverdance that most people think it is just about Irish step dancing, excluding fast-paced step dancing Riverdance actually contains passionate and powerful Spanish flamenco dancing, elegant ballet, and emotional modern dancing. The orchestra has a lot of my favorite instruments well, such as violin, tambourine, scottish bagpipe, flute. Moreover the stage scenery is amazing too.

Although driving to San Diego back and forth is painful, it is quite worthy. Thanks DC :)

The side effect is quite hard to fall asleep after coming back. While closing my eyes, I can still see those passion steps and dreamlike blue stage scenery.

Walking

2009-12-19T13:34:00.000-08:00

It is Christmas season again. After dinner, wondering around the apartment, I walked alone. It is quite different. Because most of apartments are empty, no lights, no sounds, no people. Stepping on the fallen leaves, I was in enormous homesickness. Normally, in this situation, I might just fill myself with movies, music or novels, which did not work last night. Simple letter and greeting ignite the homesickness from bottom of my heart, wantonly expanding everywhere.

It snowed in my hometown and the fragrance plum blossom might penetrate the whole city. Quite strange, last week, when I was in botanic garden, I seemed to smell it. Effect of my subconscious, could be.

Avatar

2009-12-18T23:40:00.000-08:00

Quite excited to watch the premiere, I was. The more I heard about it, the more I desired to watch it, not only because it is a ten years' masterpiece James Cameron, but also for the sound track. I guess this movie is quite suitable for theater or the people have a really fascinating sound studio at home.

As for the story, I might be just so so. This kind of material or story definitely was used before, though I can't remember the specific name. From the beginning, you probably know what will happen next. The whole point of movie is not the story, but all the CG effects with quite harmonious music to create a whole new world, a spiritual world.

Sometime, it is really hard to decide to be the people we want or just ourselves. One might come from the requirement of race, country, society, family or friend; one comes from our heart. How many of us can really tell the reality from dream and have real action, not just wait to be waken up.

PS. I was surprised of the release speed of the OST and thanks for those people who share this fabulous CD.

Inland Etude

2009-11-29T18:56:00.000-08:00

This is something, of which if you don't do now, you won't do it forever.

This is a quite famous line from the independent movie Inland Etude, which I like a lot, not only because of the sea, music, story, but also for the soul. It is a kind of idea of mini-retirement, which allows you to do the things you desired to do. If you just plan it without any real action, it will just always stay in your dream. Don't be too lazy or negative for your short life. Make it colorful and different.

There is the trailer for the movie, quite a powerful movie for your soul.

Something about expectation

2009-11-28T21:18:00.000-08:00

It has been a quite since I changed the online statement to "lower expectation or no expectation". I think it is a great to learn to be appreciated others no matter what they do and a kind of secret ingredient to become happier. Think about it clearly. It is true indeed that when people get upset or sad, for most cases it is because what they expect does not happen. As for me, I just take everything serious including whatever people tells me. Therefore I need to keep reminding myself to lower expectation or no expectation on others because when they say something or do something, they might not be sure or take it serious enough as me. Well we might be able to take it as another way to become more independent. But after trying for a while, when things happened, I guess I still can't do it for most of time. It is so hard to change the way we used to think.

When I was kids, my mother always told me to lower expectation on myself. I guess it is quite different from other parents especially when it comes to the grade or performance in school. Well I appreciated it a lot, because I know she just didn't want to give me a lot of pressure and wanted me to choose the right thing to do not just aimed at one target. For some cases, grade was nothing but a number on your school report. Different interpretation will give definitely various results.

Therefore I guess I might have lower expectation on others as well. But it is not the truth. Because from DD and ZZ, I confirmed one thing that I did have a lot of expectations on others especially those people who are important for me. Therefore it is easy to them to turn me into upset comparing with other people. That's the reason people keep saying that it is easy to get hurt by the people who are close to you. For most of cases, I think it is just like that double-edged sword which will hurt all of us which is the situation I am working so hard to get prevented from.

I guess I owned a lot of apologies to those people who love me and care me. Even if they did something wrong, they were not desired to get sad or upset because of me. As a human being, learning to be appreciated of others is a great way to become happy which will do good to others as well as himself. Then why not? :) I will Keep on working on it.

metamorphoses

2009-11-28T20:16:00.000-08:00

It has been a long time since I watched the stage play in China. From the campus newspaper I Just known that the UCR theater department would offer a lot of plays during quarters. A lot of those are quite great, while the only difference is that watching player here seems quite official. They sells tickets just like watch movie in the theater and it costs more than watching a movie.

It was quite lucky that day, because it was the last show, for some reason they reduced the number of shows. And we went to the wrong theater, so almost missed it. But quite luckily, we got some company and figured out the right place.

The stage and the decoration were quite amazing. There was a small pool in the middle of stage for the play is related to water a lot. It is a fantastic idea to have a small pool, quite consistent with the original play.

As to the "Metamorphoses",it is a play by American playwright Mary Zimmerman adapted from the classic Ovid poem, Metamorphoses (poem). I read some of those story from the original Metamorphoses when I was kid, and some of those from GRE worlds. Well the first time to watch the adapted version, kind of out of expectation.

From all the vignettes, I liked the one about Eros and Psyche best. Even though those two main actors did not speak any words, the whole story was narrated by "Q" and "A". Eros and Psyche stands for love and sole, which are quite appropriate explanation of the relationship between those. And only through blind yourselves, you can finally fall into a deep love.

And another things, watching the play seemed to be the requirement for some courses according to the survey after the play which is sad ....

Wake Me Up When September Ends

2009-10-05T13:21:00.000-07:00

It has been long since I updated it last time. Now in the middle of the Chinese National Day and Mid-autumn Day, suddenly found that I am in Oct. I really need to be waken up.

Thanks for all my friends who wrote me letters during this special holiday and help me a lot. Summer is over and new school year begins. New journey and adventure are waiting for me. I will always carry on with my smile coz I have all your supports. Really appreciated.

"Wake Me Up When September Ends"

Summer has come and passed
The innocent can never last
wake me up when September ends

like my father's come to pass
seven years has gone so fast
wake me up when September ends

here comes the rain again
falling from the stars
drenched in my pain again
becoming who we are

as my memory rests
but never forgets what I lost
wake me up when September ends

summer has come and passed
the innocent can never last
wake me up when September ends

ring out the bells again
like we did when spring began
wake me up when September ends

here comes the rain again
falling from the stars
drenched in my pain again
becoming who we are

as my memory rests
but never forgets what I lost
wake me up when September ends

Summer has come and passed
The innocent can never last
wake me up when September ends

like my father's come to pass
twenty years has gone so fast
wake me up when September ends
wake me up when September ends
wake me up when September ends

consciousness

2009-08-08T14:53:00.000-07:00

There will be no two peoples who explains the situation in the same way. Most of those opinion or consciousness comes from your previous experiences, knowledge, memory, current requirement, value, belief or future target, therefore none of them would be same and people will form their special and personal views for current situation.

What kind of mental development we really want and we are willing to have?

society and economy

2009-08-08T13:33:00.000-07:00

A about a week ago, while some friends asked me about my opinion about the future of China and the attitude toward Taiwan, we seemed to have quite a different perspective.

For most Taiwanese, they supported that Taiwan is an independent country. But surprisedly, one of them agreed with me that Taiwan is a part of China. Though I am not sure whether or not he will claim himself as an Canadian, therefore he could just say that because it is none of his business to participate in this embroilment. But I did appreciate his agreement. For the other question most of them just agreed that China will have a prosperous future and will be stronger and more powerful.

While in my opinion, I do a agree that Taiwan is definitely a part of China and is an indispansible part, however it is part of China not part of Republic of China. And for the second question, I am not sure whether or not China will become stronger and more prosperous, but I do believe that if it develops along the same way it goes not without dramatically change, the distance between rich and poor will becomes increasingly larger. And the society will become more corrupt, then it will give birth to disaster to the whole society as well as the culture and the future.

For long time ago, I always consider corruption as an individual moral issue. Recently, I do agree with the Venus project that corruption is just a kind of the basis of this society manipulated by the current monetary system. No matter how harder we try, we can not cope with those latent and underlying rules driven by the profit and the nature of the structure of this system, as well as the nature of the greedy and pursuit of the power and benefits.

Looking at current society, most the politicians wear expensive suit, talking about all kinds of notions what a society will be or promised to be. They seldom care about the basic education in rural area or the sustained environment. The most they care is how to maintain their position or the profit of their company by whom they are supported. Maybe for Adam Smith, a society promoted by the profit will become a wealth nature, but some part of those idea society is falling because of those corruption and nature of the persistence of the current system, which makes innovation much more difficult and hopeless. A lot of social issues, such as energy, education, crime and even religious issue, maybe from certain perspective, all can be considered as an corruption which is the sources of evils of this monetary system.