Nicki Woo - The Home Guru

Cinnamon Streusal Muffins, Baking Basics and Beyond GIVEAWAY, and Texting with Love. . . .

2012-02-22T10:14:00.000-06:00

Nana just got an iPhone.
She loves it.
I love it.

She has a Words with Friends Game (similar to scrabble) going on with EVERY member of my family. Except Phoebe, and as soon as Feebs gets an iPod touch, I'm sure she'll oblige.

I told her, "Mommy, I'm really busy, I don't have a lot of time to play games, but I'll try."
And it took me like two weeks but, now I'm in and I'm loving it.

Also, she sends the funniest texts.
Whenever she types, "Oh, boy!" It comes out "Ho Boy!", which makes me chuckle every. single. time.

She sends texts early in the morning that say, "Good morning love. I hope you have a wonderful day." And then I really do have a wonderful day, and I think its no coincedence.

She also sends texts that are undecipherable, and I have to call her on the phone to figure out what the heck she is talking about.

But the best. . .the very best thing is when she texts the kids. They are the most loving texts ever. This is a series of texts between my mom and my 5 year old, Soledad. The first is when Soledad was sick, and my mother was checking in on her. It starts out with a message from Soledad to tell Nana how she was feeling.

Soledad: I am fileg betr (feeling better). Loce (look) at the happy pikchr (picture)
love Soledad

Nana: What a good way to start the day. Seeing my sweet Soledad. Love Nana.

- - - - - - - - -

Soledad: Nana i had a basketball gam my tem wun. it wus 13 to 15. the tem that Had 15 wus my tem. the other tem loess (loses)

Nana: Soli, I'm so glad your team won. Wish I could have been there.

Soledad: Nana i love you so so so so so moch. I love you as a sret apple (sweet apple)

- - - - - - - -

Soledad: I love you so so so so so so so so so so so so so so

So so moch. i love you as a sret apple and a sret buttrfly (a sweet apple and a sweet butterfly -that's a lot of love)

love Soledad

Nana: Hi Pumpkin. love you so much. I am so proud of you. You make me so so happy.

Love Nana

- - - - - - - -

Nana: Soli, I hope your Valentine's Day is filled with lots of fun. I wish I could be with you. Love Nana.

Soledad: Hi Nana. I love you so moch. I have softball practis today. i hop you codov cam (can come) Love Soledad

Soledad: Do you like Lucky?

- - - - - - - - -

[Soledad requesting the game Words With Friends ]

Soledad: Wat are you playeg (what are you playing) with bella? can i play Nana.

Nana: Yes Soledad. Tell your mother so she can put it on your Ipod.

Soledad: tell me the trooth bella!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Nana I mant to sen that to bella.

Nana: OK

Soledad: But I dowt (don't ) have the gam. can you git it four me nana?

Nana: OK Soledad (*Nana then calls me 20 times on the phone until I download the app to Soledad's phone*)

Soledad: I have it nana. i will play. Wan it is lotid Nana (When it is loaded)

Nana: Thanks

Soledad: It is your trn Nana (she is telling my mom it is her turn to play in words for friends. . .totally not necessary)

Nana: it is your turn Soli.

Soledad: Are you dan (done) Nana!!!!!!!

Soledad: Are you playeg (playing) it is your trn nan

Soledad: Your name ment to be spelt like this Nana.

Soledad: I hsvt to go to the stir (i have to go to the store) i cant play

Nana: We'll play later.

Soledad: Nana it is your turn make a word. ia m tiyrd of wateg. (I am tired of waiting) Bo ho ho bo ho ho!!!!!!!!!! If you don't make a word I'm not playing.

Nana: Soledad. I was at work but I am at home now. Do you want to play words?

- - - - - - - - - - -

If it weren't for technology none of that would have happened.
My mother lives in Dallas.
And we live in Houston.
I think technology is a beautiful thing.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

Some say technology removes us from our lives.
And maybe it does, for some.
But, I think it can also bring us back to the basics.
To the simple art of love, and being together.

Basics like playing games.
Board games. Only electronically.
Talking. Only typing and texting.

And sharing a snack.
Like this one.

Cinnamon Streusal Muffins.
It comes from the cookbook, Baking Basics and Beyond by Pat Sinclair.
I would make one for each and every one of you, coupled with hot tea and napkin if I could.
But since I can't, I'm just gonna take this picture, and post this recipe and hope that you'll make it and think of me, and share it with those that you love.

Ho Boy!
I got so carried away with of this love and technology, that I forgot to tell you I want to give one of these cookbooks to YOU!

To say, embrace techonology, but still eat.
Still cook.
Still bake.
Still go the traditional, basic, tried and true way.
Just do it better. Or different.
But just do it.

Want Baking Basics and Beyond?
Here's How to Enter:

Just answer the following question in the Comments section of this post:

"What is your favorite techie gadget? And. . .how does it help keep you connected to 'The Basics' of life? ”

THE RULES
One entry per person, please. You can tell me more than one gadget, but I'm only gonna count it once. You tricky little trickster you.

The Baking Basics and Beyond GIVEAWAY will end February 28, 2012 at midnight CST. Winners will be announced on Wednesday, February 29th, 2011. Entrants limited to US and Canada. They will be chosen randomly using http://www.random.org/

Good Luck!

And NOW FOR THE RECIPE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Cinnamon Streusel Muffins
This recipe comes from Baking Basics and Beyond by Pat Sinclair and is reprinted with permission from Baking Basics and Beyond, Second Edition, by Pat Sinclair, Agate Surrey, December 2011.
I should also say, this is and EXCELLENT Cookbook with over 100 recipes and tons of great tips geared to help the novice and anyone looking to improve their baking skills :)

One of the reasons muffins are so popular is because they are quick and easy to make and full of flavor. Adding the liquid all at once to the dry ingredients actually is called the "muffin method" and makes muffins that are light and tender with an even texture inside. Serve these muffins warm from the oven with apple butter to enhance the spicy cinnamon flavor.

Makes 12 Muffins

Streusal Topping

1/4 cup all purpose flour
1/4 cup firmly packed brown sugar
1 teaspoon cinnamon
3 tablespoons cold butter

Muffins

2 cups all purpose flour
1/2 cup sugar
1/4 cup firmly packed brown sugar
1 tablespoon baking powder
1 teaspoon cinnamon
1/2 teaspon salt
3/4 cup milk
1/2 cup butter, melted
1 teaspoon vanilla
1 egg, beaten

Heat oven to 400 F (200 C) with oven rack in middle. Lightly spray 12 cups in a standard muffin pan with nonstick cooking spray.

Streusel Topping

Combine flour, brown sugar, and cinnamon in a small bowl. Cut in butter with a pastry blender until mixture resembles coarse crumbs with some pea-sized pieces.

Muffins

Combine flour, sugar, brown sugar, baking powder, cinnamon, and salt in a large bowl. Make a well in center of the flour by pushing ingredients out toward sides of bowl.

Combine milk, melted butter, vanilla, and egg in a medium bowl. Pour milk mixture into the flour mixture, and stir only until the flour is moistened even though the batter is not smooth. Scrape down sides of bowl.

Divide batter into prepared muffin cups, filling them about 2/3 full. Sprinkle about 1 tablespoon (15ml) of streusel over each muffin.

Bake 18 to 20 minutes or until golden brown and a toothpick inserted in the center of a couple of muffins comes out dry. Cool slightly and remove from the pan.

Run a small metal spatula around edge of each muffin to loosen it, and lift gently from the pan. Serve muffins warm with butter or jam.

Baker's Note: For muffins, I prefer spraying the muffin cups instead of using paperliners because      muffins usually stick to the paper.

Secret to Success: Muffins are at their best served warm from the oven. Any uneaten muffins can be wrapped and stored at room temperature. I reheat them in the microwave before serving.

Ashley's Sloppy Tacos (Slow Cooker Creamy Chicken Tacos with black beans, corn and tomatoes)

2012-02-16T08:55:00.000-06:00

February 15th

Me: I really thought you were going to buy me the Breaking Dawn Part I DVD for Valentine's Day.

Warwick: Oh.

Me: I mean I didn't really expect a present, but I kinda did. You always buy me something.

Warwick: Yeah. Well, time was running out, and I was going to but. . . . . . then I didn't.

Me: Buy me a present?

Warwick: Yeah. Buy you the DVD.

Me: Oh.

Warwick: I was looking at all the DVD's and I couldn't figure out which one to get. The one with the life size poster? The one with the white cover? The two disk copy with the picture of that guy on the front.

Me: ANY copy would have great. But, ummm.. . . 2 disc copy is always a safe bet. And a picture of that guy would have been good too.

Him: Okay.

Me: But . . . . . . . . I did like the card you gave me. It was really nice. If you really meant all those things the author of the card wrote.. . . . .. for me . . . .from you.

Him: Yeah, I did. I meant them. I started to get you a Twilight Card, but then I thought it was too corny.

Me: I like corny.

Him: Okay. Maybe I'll get it next time.

Me: Okay. Just remember, the card is for ME. You don't have to like it, if you know I will. That's why I put back the Charlie Brown cute Valentine's card for husbands, and got you that card that said "Please DO ME for Valentine's Day." I thought you would like it.

Him: I did. I do.

Me: Good. You know, you can still buy the DVD. The store didn't sell out.

Him: Okay. We'll go and pick it out together.

Me: Really?

Him: Yes.

Me: Okay. I'd like that. I love you.

Him: Love you too.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Well, ours is a bit of a Sloppy Love Story.
And our Valentine's Day was sloppy as well.

But it was nice.
Low key.
He came home early from work and helped me cook dinner, Steaks, Shrimp and Salad.
Blackberry Cobbler for dessert.
The kids ate up a vat full of candy that they got from school.
Two softball practices and an episode of Parenthood later, I was knocked out.

My favorite part of the day was when my eyes were drifting shut, and he leaned over and kissed me on the forehead and told me he loved me.

Sloppy can be a really good thing.

Ashley's Sloppy Tacos
My buddy Ashley gave me this recipe. She is the mama to my sweet Bella's best friend since kindergarten. I love her. She's funny, crazy, and is just one of those people who makes your life better in a million different ways.

Anyway, Ash is the Queen of quick, nutritious meals and she rambled this one off to me last week while we were at the gym.
"Chicken Breast, Corn, Black Beans, Cream Cheese, Tomatoes, Crock Pot. . . . DONE!" She boasted.
I thought, sounds too good to be true.
But it wasn't.
You probably have all the stuff in your pantry to make it tonight.
Just grab some frozen chicken and five minutes and let it ride.

Ingredients:
1 1/2 - 2 pounds chicken breast
1 - 28 oz can Rotel tomatoes
1 8 oz block of cream cheese (I used the 1/3 less fat variety)
8 oz frozen corn
1 - 15 oz can black beans, rinsed and drained
whole wheat tortillas
1 onion, chopped
Cilantro, optional
Sour Cream, optional

Directions:
1. Add all the ingredients to your slow cooker, cover and cook on HIGH for 6 hours.

2. Remove chicken and shred. Place chicken back in the slow cooker. Mix well.

3. Serve with tortillas and garnish with cilantro, sour cream, and cheddar cheese.

Heart Shaped Pancakes with Light Chocolate Ganache Sauce

2012-02-14T08:26:00.001-06:00

Dear YOU,

I wanted to tell you something. Something that kinda gets my stomach all in knots. Makes me a little bit anxious and a lot bit woozy.

Here goes . . . . ..

You make me happy.
I'm very happy having you in my life. I. . . .uuuhhh, love you.

When my husband asks me about my blog, I laugh and tell him about the funny comments you left for me that day. I tell him how much I enjoy hearing your stories and how glad I am that YOU are in my life.

I call you my friend.
I don't call you my reader.
I don't call you my blogger buddy.
I just call you my friend.

Many of you, I've never met in the flesh, but that doesn't mean I love you any less. You have become a part of my life, and it means a lot to me to know that I have you as a friend on the other end of this computer screen.

Anyway, my husband thinks I'm a little coo-coo. Willy nilly calling you my friend, saying that I love you.

But I do. And I hope you feel the same. Happy Valentine's Day.

Love,

Nicole
(Nicki Woo)

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - --- - - - - - - - -

When you are loved by Nicki Woo, it's a heavy burden to bear.

I will. . . . .
Dig in your ears.
Smell your breath twenty times a day.
Yell at you for using harsh tones or calling people out of their name.
Kiss you more times than you can count.
Hug you tight. Hug you long.
Let you sleep in my bed if your tummy hurts.
YELL AT YOU for doing nothing wrong because I'm on my period.
Cry, when you send me texts that say
"Good Morning Love. Hope you have a great day! Love Mom"
Ignore you when I'm on the phone with you because I'm multi-tasking.
And. . . .

Make you heart shaped pancakes with LIGHT chocolate ganache sauce.
I hope the burden is not too much to bear.

Heart Shaped Pancakes with Light Chocolate Ganache Sauce
Super easy to make. . . .and super special.

Basic Buttermilk Pancake Recipe or
Bisquick Ultimate Melt in Your Mouth Pancakes Recipe (this is a great dense pancake recipe perfect for shaping into hearts)

Light Chocolate Ganache Sauce
1 1/4 cup soy milk (or use any type of milk you have)
3/4 cup semi-sweet chocolate chips

1. Make pancake batter according to directions. You need a dense pancake batter that easily holds its shape when forming hearts.

2.Spray griddle with cooking spray.

3. Place batter onto griddle in the form of hearts. Cook until edges are dry. Turn. Cook until golden.

To Make the Ganache:

1. In a microwave safe bowl, add the chocolate chips and soy milk. Microwave until warm. Stir to melt. Whisk until smooth. Pour over pancakes. Devour.

Spinach Pesto IN A FLASH!!!

2012-02-08T12:00:00.000-06:00

All I want is for my girls to get along.

To love each other.
To take up for one another.
To know that if there is anyone in the world who they can depend on, it's their sisters.

They don't have to like each other.
But I want them to, with every inch of their little souls, LOVE one another.
More than they love anyone or anything.
That is what I want.

And this is what I'm up against.
I found this on the kitchen counter yesterday.

A poem written by Shelbi.
A poem about her sisters.
She got a 100 on it.

- - -

Sisters

Sisters are a pain,
just like a stain.

They make me want to cry.
They make me want to die.

They get me in trouble.
I wish I was in a bubble.

I want them to go away,
and never come back someday.

- - - - -

Lord help us all.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

So I'm not really sure what I should think.
I'm thinking maybe this poem is a bit like this pesto.

When you first look at it you think, Oh! Basil, little bit spicy, a lot bit yummy. But then when you taste it you're like oh. . .no basil. it's mild, yet full of flavor. Yummy AND surprisingly comforting.

Maybe that is the essence of this poem.

When I first looked at it I was like "Oh, a lovely poem by my genius child Shelbi! I know this will be a winner."

And then I read it. And it wasn't what I thought it would be. AT ALL. Surprisingly rude and slightly nauseating for a mother who's endeavor in life is for her children to love one another.

But then I reread it and thought, It's kinda funny. And it's not like we didn't know she felt this way. And well, I think I kinda like it. NO. I know I love it. Because this is so my Shelbi. And I'm sure she loves her sisters even if they make her want to die.

It's just all how you look at it.
I guess.

Pesto can be mild. And sisters can be pests.
And its all lovely.
Yes, lovely.

Easy Spinach Pesto
I don't know if words can accurately explain to you how much I LOVE THIS PESTO. My children, God love them (even if Shelbi doesn't) don't really care for pesto made from basil. And well, I love pesto, and was really thinking I might trade my kids in for a new lot for this very reason alone. But ever since Spinach Pesto has walked into our lives, I don't think we'll ever be the same. Last night we ate it on pasta for dinner, on Super Bowl Sunday we used it as a dip to go with the raw vegetable platter. Last week, I put it on chicken, pasta, bread and I may have just eaten it off the spoon. This stuff is so good. No doubt.

Adapted from Thursday Night Pizza (Father Dominic's Favorite Pizza Recipes) By Father Dominic Garramone ~Check out this book for tons of savory and sweet pizza recipes, tips, tricks, and sauces!

Ingredients:

4 cups baby spinach, washed
3 cloves garlic
1/2 cup walnuts
1/3 cup olive oil
1/2 cup Parmesan Cheese, grated
1 small lemon, juiced
salt and pepper, to taste

Directions:
1. Into a food processor or blender add 2 cups of spinach, garlic, nuts and lemon juice.
Puree until well blended.
2. Add remaining spinach, olive oil and cheese. Blend until smooth. Season with salt and pepper to taste.

Last Minute Superbowl Party Dip: Spicy Roasted Red Pepper Dip and The Ninja Professional Blender

2012-02-05T11:04:00.000-06:00

It's five o'clock in the morning.
On Superbowl Sunday morning.

I should be sleeping.
Dreaming about what confections I might eat tonight.
How many wings I might eat.
How many cherry bars I'll be able to shove down my throat.

But instead. . . . .
I'm practicing my Yoga breathing techniques and breathing slow and deep.
Wishing I knew Karate so that I could go all Ninja crazy Kung Fu on these jokers in my house.

WHO ALL wanted a Superbowl Party. WHO ALL said we NEVER have anyone over. WHO ALL were at home BY THEMSELVES, with no distractions and neglected to CLEAN THE HOUSE when that was the only job they had.

And now it's five o'clock in the morning.
And I still have to decorate.
Wash the dishes.
Vacuum.
Clean the bathrooms.
And cook.
Hot Wings.
Submarines.
Box Brownies.
Turkey Chili.
Jalapeno Poppers.
Cherry Almond Bars.
Cheesecake Lemon Bars.
Bacon-Maple-Bourbon-Coffee Caramel Corn.
Fruit Trays.
Strawberry Lemonade.
Tea.

So I decided to write to you instead. And breathe. I've been doing lots of breathing.
I'm not gonna let this upset me.
Because I love those crazy knuckleheads and I don't want any toxic mentalities invading my aura today.

So I'm going to try and stay in the moment.
And suggest that Warwick HANG MY WALL HANGINGS ON THE WALL NOW.

That he clean the bathrooms and supervise the girls more diligently, while I quietly bust my a** in the kitchen.
That the girls clean up their pigstys/rooms so that I don't go all Kung Fu Crazy Ninja on them.

I'm breathing now.
I'm putting on Smooth Jazz.
I'm lighting candles.
I'm burning incense.

And I am not listening to that crazy voice in my head that is telling me to freak out. NOW.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

I'm just now learning that everything and everybody comes into my life for a reason. TO HELP ME GROW.

My kids help me with patience.
My husband helps me with self esteem.
My dog helps me with patience, self esteem, and urine removal.

And this. . .

is going to help me with the SuperBowl.
The Ninja Professional Blender.

When I woke up feeling the vibe of the Ninja, I thought I was supposed to be karate chopping my family for their very horrible behavior.

But looky here. It was just the universe sending me love and help.

Blend your way into calmness, Little Grasshopper.
Press button and chop, chop, chop your frustration.
Choose bright red food that will help you live long time, and shove in mouth.
Use hard bread to scoop it up as utensil.
This will save time and money.
Use Ninja Professional Blender wisely.
Use Ninja for savory and sweet.
Use Ninja always.

Spicy Roasted Red Pepper Dip

The is the first thing I made with my new blender. I think my guests are going to enjoy this last minute sweet, spicy and savory treat I just whipped up.

Adapted from the Ninja Kitchen

Ingredients:

7 Wheat crackers
1 jar 12 oz. roasted red pepper, drained
3/4 cup walnuts
1/2 lemon, juiced
1/2 tbsp. Honey
3/4 tsp. Ground cumin
1/4 tsp Cayenne
1/2 cup reduced fat cream cheese
1/4 of a small onion
Salt and Pepper, to taste
Pita Chips, Bagel Chips or 1 loaf of sourdough bread, cut into 1-inch slices (to make crostini)
1/4 cup olive oil (if using sourdough bread)

Directions:

1. Place the crackers, peppers and walnuts into the blender (Ninja Kitchen System). Cover and process until the mixture is finely chopped.

2. Add the lemon juice, honey, cumin, cayenne, cream cheese and onion. Process until the mixture forms a paste. Season with salt and pepper. Refrigerate until ready to use.
To Make Crostini (little toast chips):

1. Brush the bread slices with the oil. Place the bread slices onto a baking sheet. Broil 7 inches from the heat for 2 minutes or until the bread slices are lightly browned on both sides, turning the bread slices over once halfway through broiling.

Serve Crostini with Spicy Red Pepper Dip.

What I like about it:
The Ninja Kitchen system can kick some serious rear in the kitchen. It can blend, puree and process. Also, IT ALSO (hold your breathe) can knead dough for pizza, bread, pretzels, and cookies.

It comes with . . . .

Ninja® Kitchen System Base and 40 oz. Processing Bowl with Blade and Lid
72 oz. Pitcher with Blade and Lid
Whisk Attachment, Dough Hook and Dough Paddle

The pitcher is XL which is great in my house for making smoothies so that I don't have to make 2 batches.

There is a handy lock on the bottom which makes the base suction onto the counter for heavy duty mixing.

I'm pulling really hard and its not moving an inch.

Retail Price: $159.80
Cost to Me: Free

Disclaimer: Nobody paid me to say I like this Ninja Kitchen System. Nobody paid me to throw a Superbowl party. Nobody paid me to clean my house, play smooth jazz or light incense. Can you get paid for that? If that's a job, I'd like to have it. Anyway. . .I digress. All the opinions are my own, and I received no compensation, but I did receive a Ninja Professional Blender for review purposes.

Superbowl Party Food: Uber Easy Oven Baked Meatballs with Flaxseed Water instead of Egg. . .Yum!!!!

2012-02-01T13:51:00.000-06:00

{Last Day to enter the Edible Brooklyn: The Cookbook Giveaway! Ends tonight Feb. 1, 2012!}

[2 Days Ago]

Okay.

I sat down to type to you, and tell you some other stuff but I've got some serious heavy business on my mind that just can't be escaped.

I was shopping the other day at TJ Maxx looking for new pillows for my couches . . . .

to match a new painting on my wall. . . .

and I found a purse.
Mustard.
Hobo-esque.
Genuine Leather.
With pockets for glasses, and keys, and make-up. Inside pockets. Outside pockets. Pockets. Pockets. Pockets.

And. . . .
it was on clearance. Regular price like $80. On clearance for. . . .$15.

I carried it around the store with me while I shopped. I picked out 4 pillows. And a lovely red and white peppered throw. I saw some baskets that I could really use in my laundry room re-org and I needed like 8 and they were $7.99 each, and. . . . I already had like $80 worth of stuff in my basket.

I put the baskets back.
Those I could wait on.
Can't put the pillows back.
Can't put the throw back.
Do I put the $15 mustard yellow leather perfect purse/bag up? DO I? DO I?

So I just stood there.

It was a painful process.
I wasn't even aware of the purses existence until 20 minutes ago, and now its life or death whether it returns home with me.
What will my husband say?
It's already dicey as to whether or not he's going to fully embrace my redecorating project for the living room. Will he love the contrast of black and white, with a splash of color?

Will he think the throw, thrown onto the sofa will be too 'cottage' like for his taste.
No. I must leave the purse.
The entire living room decorating project depends on it.
The purse can take it like a soldier.
It'll be okay.

- - - - - - - - - - - - --

[TODAY - 9:48 am]

It's NOT okay.
I want that purse.
I just radioed my husband (ie. I ran outside to tell him as he was preparing to leave for work)

"Ummm. . .Warwick. Monday, I saw this purse and I can't stop thinking about it, so I'm about to go back to the store and dirty the truck that you just washed BECAUSE it's crucial that I have that purse and that purse has me."

"Oh." He says. "Well, what does it look like?"

"It's mustard, and its BIG and really great.That's basically it in a nutshell. Oh! And it's real leather, AND its on clearance. Really. Its perfect."

"Wonder if I'll think it's perfect." He raises an eyebrow.

"Does that matter?" I raise an eyebrow to his raised eyebrow.

"I think it does if I'm going to be walking next to it for the rest of my life." He mumbles.

"Okay, then. I'm going to get it so you can see."

"Okay."

"Okay." And I then walked inside the house. To type to you.

To tell you I'm anxious, and that I need that purse. I just called the store to see if it was still on the clearance rack, the sales guy went to check and he can't find it. *taps fingers on the desk*

So you know what that means don't you?
I gotta go.
NOW. Like in real time. It's 9:48 am. I'll be right back.

- - - - - - - - -

I'm back. Its 11:21 am.

I walked straight over to the clearance rack, and couldn't find it.
I went to the back of the store and couldn't find it.
I went back to the front and found five other purses I liked for about $199 a piece.
I groaned.
I moaned.
I moped.
I hoped.

And then I opened my eyes. . .
and I saw it. Crammed into a corner of the sales rack with some really atrocious purses.

And I was so happy. I cried out of pure pleasure.
And then I looked at it closer and thought, It doesn't look as beautiful and life changing as I remember.
And Phoebe didn't even want me to put it in the basket because she said it was too big.
And it is kinda big.
And not really the same color yellow that I remembered it being.
It might be too HOBO-ish.
Uuuggghhh. I don't know. Who cares.
I bought it anyway.
And my life is exactly the same as it was 2 hours ago, just now I own a kinda mustard purse that I'm sure I'll grow to re-love.
Uuuggghhh.

- - - - - - - - - -

MEATBALLS.
What a whirlwind.

Meatballs! Meatballs!
Shopping makes me CRAZEEEEEE!!!!

Meatballs! Meatballs! Meatballs!
Somebody throw one in my mouth and on my fingers so I can stop talk typing and proving that I'm a total nut case.

Whatever, self.
I may be a nut case, but it appears to be working to my advantage so far.
Just look.
I've got this purse I think I like.

My couches have these lovely pillows, I know I like.

And I have meatballs. In my brain. AND on my plate.
That are SUPER (bowl) easy to make.

What else could a person want?

Uber Easy Oven Baked Turkey Meatballs with Flax seed Water instead of Eggs
Seriously. Even though I am crazy, I know a good meatball when I meet one. And these are soooooo good. We had them for dinner last night with pasta and my family tore them up. I think I'm going to make them for Super Bowl Sunday and make mini sliders out of them. Yummers. Or I could throw them in a crock pot with my fave sauce. Whatevs. They take 2 minutes to prepare, and 30 minutes to cook. And zero effort. Total Game Winner.

* I used Flaxseed water instead of egg because I didn't have any eggs. When the flax seed is whirled in a blender with water, the combination of the two becomes the consistency of an egg. Crazy, right? Yes it is. And it binds like crazy, just like an egg. Feel free to use an egg in this recipe, or not. In any case, some other day, when you don't have any eggs you might try this tip out in your recipe and see if it works for you:)

Ingredients:

1 1/2 pounds Ground Turkey
1 package of Onion Soup (dry mix)
1/2 cup plain breadcrumbs
1/4 cup Flaxseed Water or 1 egg (to make flax seed water blend 1/4 cup water with 1 TB ground flax seed in a blender for 2 minutes)
1 TB milk

Directions:

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
2. In a medium bowl, mix all the ingredients together until just combined. Form into balls and place onto a lined baking sheet.

3. Bake for 30 minutes or until cooked through. Enjoy!

Super Bowler Baller Corn: Bacon-Maple-Bourbon Coffee Caramel Corn

2012-01-31T07:58:00.000-06:00

[Don't forget to enter the Edible Brooklyn: The Cookbook Giveaway!]

Every year for the Super Bowl we all wonder where the heck we are going to watch the game.

The year the Bowl came to Houston, all our friends sat together in my husband's old neighborhood munching on Brownies, wings, and popping our eyes out of our head as Justin Timberlake ripped Janet Jackson's shirt the mess off.

Usually the children are running around the house completely involved in their own worlds, as the parents take their seats in the Den surrounded by yummy food, laughter, and tales of Jr. High Football upsets.

These are the times when you find out that your husband was always as sweet as he is today.
And that he has always liked to walk around in his underwear.

This is when you grow deep bonds with your husband's best friends wife because she deals with the same nonsense that you vowed you would deal with for the rest of your life.

Recipes are shared, pots of luck are spread to fit every inch of the kitchen table, and we all unite for one night to enjoy the same things, laugh at the same jokes, and remember what it is like to be completely immersed in the moment.

We'll yell.
IT'S A CRYING SHAME!
But secretly we'll love the call the ref just made.
We'll shove each other around, with all the love we have to muster.
We'll giggle, and chug on beer, and lick our fingers.

It's SUPER BOWL SUNDAY, gosh durnit.

Live it. Breath it. Eat it.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

I think we are hosting a Super Bowl Party for the 4th year in a row.

I'm not really sure.
I think the usual email has already been sent asking my hubs "What is everyone doing for Superbowl?"

Usually he ignores the first go round.

It's the second flag that usually gets his attention.
I think that happened last night. His best friend said EVERYONE is wondering "whats up for the Super Bowl." His friend chuckled and said he told everyone, he's not sure . . . . but maybe The Woo's are having financial difficulties that's why we haven't offered. . . .yet.

Now the third flag has been thrown.
Because Warwick relayed this message to me today.

Still, I think I'll make them sweat.
Make them wait a few days longer before we announce that we are having a party.
Then. . . .

It's on like Donkey Kong. . .Eating Bacon Maple Bourbon Coffee Caramel Corn.

Now that is a serious party.

Bacon-Maple-Bourbon Coffee Caramel Corn

Ingredients:

1 STICK UNSALTED BUTTER

1/4 CUP LIGHT CORN SYRUP

1/4 CUP DARK (Grade 8) MAPLE SYRUP

1/4 CUP BOURBON

2 CUPS SUGAR

NON STICK COOKING SPRAY

20 CUPS OF POPPED POPCORN

1 1/2 TSP FINELY GROUND COFFEE*

1 CUP COOKED BACON, CRUMBLED INTO PIECES*

1 TSP BAKING SODA

SERVES 8-10

1. Melt the butter in a medium saucepan set over low heat. Stir in the light corn syrup, maple syrup, bourbon, and sugar. Increase the heat to medium-high, place a candy thermometer in the saucepan, and continue to cook until the temperature reads 300. *

2. In the meantime, heavily coat a large bowl (or two, if necessary) with nonstick cooking spray, and add the popcorn. Also spray 2 spatulas and set aside.

3. When the bourbon mixture reaches 300 F*, take it off the heat immediately and add the coffee, stirring well. Add the cooked bacon pieces and baking soda. Blend well until fully incorporated.

4. Carefully add the hot bourbon mixture to the popcorn and immediately toss with spatulas until thoroughly coated. (Keep tossing the popcorn until it cools down a bit or the caramel corn will stick to itself. If that happens spray on some more nonstick spray and it will separate.) Let cool completely before serving.

*Nicki Woo's Notes: The recipe is easily cut in half and even in quarters. Also I used Instant Coffee for the finely ground coffee. For ease and quickness, try using the already cooked crumbled bacon pieces that you can find in the salad dressing aisle of the grocery. Not bacon bits, the real bacon. And one more thing. . .if you don't have a candy thermometer, take the caramel mixture to the hard crack stage. . .meaning when the caramel has reached an amber color, test it by dropping a bit of it into ice cold water. If it hardens into crunchy ribbons, it's ready.

Tortilla Crusted Catfish. . .and all the things I love.

2012-01-27T06:31:00.000-06:00

[Don't forget to enter the Edible Brooklyn: The Cookbook GIVEAWAY!]

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Do you know what i love?

Lavender and Rosemary and the scent it leaves on your fingers when you brush it lightly.

I love pretty things.

And babies. That aren't quite babies anymore, but little souls roaming around my house causing havoc.

White dogs. That love so hard, that they often get in trouble for it. White dogs that stink. White dogs that smell like soap. White dogs that turn brown when they've been digging in my garden.

Spin class. Lord have mercy, I can't believe I'm saying that. But I do. I love how my legs want to give out the first 20 minutes and then at minute 21 they suddenly are refreshed and pulling me into oblivion with wet rat hair.

My grocery store. The produce department. The mounds of apples, and 5 pound bags of grapefruit for 99 cents. 15 cent limes and OH! Strawberry Bananas. That are small, and red, and don't ripen quick at all so they can sit on your counter for a whole week and still be perfectly wonderful to eat.

Bacon. Just Bacon.

And him.

And her.

That's what I love.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

I should just stop there.
Just tie it up with a bow all tidy like.
Perfect.
What a sweet Mama to end her list of love things with her family.
But I can't.

Cause I love this too.

AM IN LOVE WITH IT.

Can one love a fish?
A dead one?
One that is part whisker and part fin?
Yes, one can. . . .IF it is covered in Tortilla Crust. It's a fact.

Tortilla Crusted Catfish (or Tilapia or any other fish that would taste great with tortilla crust, which is probably EVERY fish.)
Every time I go to the grocery store I walk right over to the Seafood case to see what's in. Sometimes I buy Fresh Gulf Shrimp or Cod for Fishcakes, but what I always want to buy are Tortilla Crusted Tilapia. They sit cozy all seasoned and lovely calling to me. But I only can answer that call every so often because they cost $2.99 a pop. And 'round here my kids gobble up fish. That's a lot of poppin'.So I googled Tortilla Crusted Catfish, and this is what I came up with. I changed it up a bit, cause I always do, but I do think it's a lovely stand-in.

Adapted from Food.com

Serves 4.

Ingredients:

6 corn tortillas, torn into strips
1 jalapeno pepper (I used a sweet banana pepper), seeded and finely diced
1/2 lime juiced (about 2 tsp)
1/4 cup cilantro, chopped finely
1/2 tsp chili powder
1/4 tsp cumin
1 tsp seasoning salt plus more for seasoning the fish
1 egg, beaten
cooking spray, optional

Directions:

1. Preheat oven to 400 degrees.
2.Season the fish well with seasoning salt. Let sit in refrigerator for 30 minutes while you make the crust.
2. In a food processor, chop up tortilla strips into tiny flaky pieces. Place in a medium sized bowl.

3. Add pepper, lime juice, cilantro, chili powder, cumin, and 1 tsp of seasoning salt. Mix well.

4. Dredge catfish in egg and then into tortilla crumb mixture. Pat to adhere. Spray with cooking spray. Place on a lined baking sheet and cook for 15-20 on 400 or until fillets are cooked through and crust begins to brown. Serve warm.

Raw Kale Salad with Peanut Honey Dressing and a GIVEAWAY ~ Edible Brooklyn: The Cookbook

2012-01-25T12:39:00.000-06:00

Yesterday. My, oh my. Yesterday.

It was a doozy.

I went to a kick your hiney abdominal, legs, arms, crazy lady class at the gym. I figured out that I don't know what a 'plank' is, but more importantly, I CAN'T DO ONE. I need to figure out what do when I'm in an exercise class and I discover that I have no abdominal muscles and my arms don't work. Hint: Don't cry.

Also. . .against my better judgement, I went to Spin Class. And I spun. But, and as warned, it did feel slightly like I had a rod up my rear, but I ate ice cream as a reward afterward, so everything was gravy, baby.

Then, I went to the grocery store, and they didn't have any Kale.
BUT. . . . . . I only had to give Phoebe two lollipops to behave.

I came home, put the munchkin to bed, and cleaned up dog pee 2 times. Once off the carpet and once in my bathroom and once, off of my foot. Scratch that. I cleaned up pee THREE times.

Next, because I reeked, I took a shower. Washed my hair, and made it smooth and slick.

I put on real clothes (those that do not contain elastic AND do not contain holes) and pre-made my kids their after school snack.

I ate my lunch. Tortilla Crusted Tilapia and Green Leafy Salad with Peanut Butter - Honey Dressing.

2 minutes later, Soledad burst threw the front door, home from school. "Mommy, Mommy, Mommy! I need my snack quick! I have softball today. It's my first practice ever and I'm going to be GREAT! So I need a healthy snack and some water." And then I wept from pride.

We all got dressed went to softball practice, where Soledad proceeded to act a damn fool and not listen to a word anybody including the coach said. Warwick was mortified. I was normal.

I left softball practice early to bring Shelbi to the District Science Fair Awards Ceremony. She won 2nd place at her school for her project entitled Puppy Poopy. See above. She measured the different effects of different grades of dog food on the dogs energy put out, ie. dog poop. The more he pooped after eating a certain dog food, the less of the food he was able to use for energy.

As Shelbi and I were rushing in the Auditorium doors to save seats, I looked down and noticed what she was wearing. TO. AN. AWARDS. CEREMONY.

Jean Shorts. Dingy.
Flip Flops. Speedo.
Striped Shirt. Nice. Abercrombie.
And a hoodie. Total chilax.

My heart dropped. I looked her dead in the eye and completely FREAKED OUT. I whisper yelled, "What in the world do you have on? Oh my goodness. Why in the world would you wear flip flops in the middle of winter to an awards ceremony? And shorts??? Don't even get me started. You look like a total frump-chump. YES, that is a thing. And I don't care that you don't care. SERIOUSLY. I'm so angry I could puke! Who cares if you don't care what you look like, I DO. AND SO DOES MY MOTHER . MY poor mother would be mortified! Do you know what Nana would think??? This is horrible. And what if they call your name???? And you walk up on the stage looking like this? What will people think? They'll think I'm a horrible mother, that's what! And they'll be right! Oh. my. goodness. Because I never looked at you before we walked out the door. I'm such a horrible mother. AND NOW THE ENTIRE SCHOOL DISTRICT IS GOING TO KNOW. Thanks for that."

She lowered her eyes. And we went to sit down.
And I wanted to throw up for yelling at her. Horrible mother indeed.

I leaned over and told her I was sorry 20 times, but she just pursed her lips and gave me the side glance.

So since she wasn't talking to me, I took an incognito picture of her toes.
Aren't they pretty? Mondrian inspired. She is a very talented nail painter.

So anyway, Warwick and the other girls, finally showed up and created a ruckus that mortified Shelbi, and we went home, without an award in hand, because Shelbi didn't win for the second year in a row.

We told her we were proud of her 50 times. And she rolled her eyes at us 60 times.

We arrived home.

Ate dinner.

Cleaned up broken tea bags off the floor that the dog chewed up.
Ate frozen yogurt sandwiches.
Yelled at each other because we were all so cranky, and went to bed.

The end.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

I say all of that, to let you know. . . .I'm tired.

My brain hurts.
My thighs hurt.
And I have a headache.

Yesterday was a HARD day.
And the highlight was the Peanut Honey Dressing that I had for lunch and dinner atop my greens. It comes from a new cookbook entitled Edible Brooklyn, The Cookbook edited by Rachel Wharton. (Hardcover, over 100 recipes and color photos)

It's all about how Brooklyn Lives. Cooks. And Eats.

Showcasing the profiles of Brooklyn's Culinary Community, and sharing the traditions, and experiences of the lives of the Foodies of Brooklyn.

I wonder if they yell at their kids while making Backyard Egg Tacos.
OR attend softball tournaments with Pickled Herring as a snack.
I'm thinking no work-out is complete unless you're coming home to Oven-Roasted Salsa Verde.

In any case, 3 out of 4 of my children LOVED the Salad with the Peanut Honey Dressing. So according to my calculations, there is a 75% chance you are going to love it too.
It makes it not matter that you can't lift up your arms.
Or that your daughter is a total grunge type dresser.
It makes your children remember to love you even if you are a crazy person.
Its powerful stuff.

Now. Just to make myself feel better from my lackluster performance of a human being yesterday, I'm giving away one copy of Edible Brooklyn, The Cookbook.

So that maybe if you have a crap day, you can make one of these recipes and turn your frown upside down.

Peace Out Peeps. Much Love.

HERE'S HOW TO ENTER:

Just answer the following question in the Comments section of this post:

"What food can make your frown turn upside down? Does it effect the way you cook. eat. live?”

THE RULES

One entry per person, please. I'll eat everything you type, so give a sister a break.

The Edible Brooklyn: The Cookbook GIVEAWAY will end February 1, 2012 at midnight CST. Winners will be announced on Thursday, February 2nd, 2012. Entrants limited to US and Canada. They will be chosen randomly using http://www.random.org/

Good Luck!

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Update: And the Winner is. . . . . . .

brittany boardley renaldi-

My mom's stuffed shells always make me feel better.

Brittany - contact nickiwoo.thehomeguru@gmail.com in the next 48 hours to claim your prize!

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Now here's the recipe . . . . .

Raw Kale Salad with Peanut Honey Dressing
Reprinted from Edible Brooklyn: The Cookbook © 2011 by Edible Brooklyn. Permission from Sterling Epicure, an imprint of Sterling Publishing Co., Inc.

This salad is going to knock your socks off. And that is a good thing.

Serves 4.

Ingredients:

1 LARGE BUNCH OF KALE (ABOUT 12-15 STALKS), WASHED AND CUT INTO 1/4-INCH STRIPS
JUICE FROM 3 LEMONS (ABOUT 5 TBSP)
1/4 CUP WHITE WINE VINEGAR
1/4 CUP EXTRA VIRGIN OLIVE OIL
2 TBSP HONEY
2 TBSP NATURAL SMOOTH PEANUT BUTTER (NO SUGAR ADDED)
1/4 CUP SESAME SEEDS
SALT
FRESHLY GROUND BLACK PEPPER

1. Place the kale in a large glass or stainless steel bowl, pour the lemon juice and vinegar over it, and toss well. Let sit for 3 minutes to tenderize the greens.

2. In a medium bowl, whisk the olive oil, honey, and peanut butter to combine. Pour over the kale, using a spatula to scrape down the sides of the bowl if needed.

3. Sprinkle with the sesame seeds and salt and pepper to taste. Mix well.

Smoothie for Your Heart: Orange Vanilla Protein (Tastes like an Orange Julius)

2012-01-23T08:50:00.000-06:00

It just occurred to me that in September, I wrote and cried and slobbered and prayed to you about my Poppy Pops. I cried about his heart transplant surgery and how I felt like I was dying inside. I moaned about my regrets, wishes and hopes, and I how I needed him HERE to be a part of all of that.

I needed him NOT to die.
And he almost did.
In fact, if you ask him, he would tell you he almost did. More than once. From fever. From kidney failure. From a crazy one-eyed heavy-handed nurse. That's another story.

That the pain was so bad he wanted to leave this place. But he didn't because he kept hearing the voices of the people he loved. That our faces would appear to him at his lowest, and he made it through fighting demons and devils by calling on Jesus. All the while to his family and friends his body just laid there on the hospital bed, still. . .swollen. . . .broken.

That is what he would tell you.
He would also tell you that he could have sworn that I performed the surgery.. . . . .
which I don't think I did. But he did know exactly what I was wearing and how I was wearing my hair. . .so maybe. . . I think he felt my prayers.

Because I prayed and prayed and prayed. I Facebook prayed. I Twitter prayed. I prayed on my knees, in the shower, and while I was cooking. I prayed while running, walking, screaming and yelling. I prayed all the time. And so did my friends. And my friends of friends of friends.

And I want to thank you.
Because it worked.
Look at my Daddy now.
Getting better everyday.
He can walk five blocks now.
No help needed.

All my love to all of you who had our back. I will be forever grateful.

His tried and true doctor. They are soulmates. They are planning a trip to Vietnam together.

A friend is pictured with my father who had a heart transplant two years ago.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

I've been thinking a lot about my Dad lately.
He lives so far away, so I don't get to see him at much as I would like.

The other day I was in Hobby Lobby and I saw a picture frame that made me think of him.
It says. . ."America calls him a soldier. I call him Dad."

So I picked it up and decided I would send it to him to let him know I'm so proud of him. To let him know that I love him so much. It's a picture of me and my dad running a race together when I was 7. I beat the pants off of him. I'm wondering if he's going to want a re-match.

Maybe I should send him this picture instead. I'm a little out of shape.

And then, after the frame was all boxed up and ready to go, I started thinking of recipes that I could send him. Because, that's what I do for people I love. Fill their belly's with things that will make them strong and happy.

And this little toddy, totally fits the bill.
Super great for his new 20 year old heart, and yours too.
With orange, strawberry, banana, it's sure to put power in his punch and fuel his body for all the rehab he has been doing lately.

I had one this morning, and I liked it so much I think I'll make it again tomorrow morning. And the morning after that. And after that, and after that.

Here's to our hearts!
Treat them well!

Orange Vanilla Protein Smoothie (Tastes like an Orange Julius)

Ingredients:

8 oz. orange juice
1/2 banana
5 strawberries
5 ice cubes
1 tsp vanilla extract
2 tsp Splenda (or whatever sweetener you like)
1 Scoop Vanilla Protein Powder

Directions:

1. Stick all the ingredients in a blender and BLEND the mess out of it. Slurp, Slurp, Slurp away!!!!

Coffee Protein Smoothie with a bit of banana thrown in.

2012-01-20T12:35:00.000-06:00

Dear Self,

Get some cojones. Or maybe just borrow your husbands.

Throw on your tight spandex workout pants (the ones with the neon hot pink around the waist) and your body glove tank top and walk your scary little toosh into the Spin Class and OWN IT.

Will you look like an idiot? Maybe.
Will you not know what the heck your doing? Probably.

But like we heard in that movie trailer that one time for that movie we don't remember the name for, that was advertising to teenagers. . . .If you are scared to do something, that is probably a sign to DO IT. Rock on.

Who cares if when you lean over your stomach is a little rumply.
Who cares that due to a recent hair cut your hair looks like a hot mess when wet and plastered to your forehead. THIS IS NOT A FASHION CONTEST. Plus, your husband loves you and doesn't care if look like a giant unborn fetus that has been swimming laps in an Olympic pool. HE THINKS YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL ALL THE TIME. Or at least, that is what he tells you, and really, that is all that matters.

So go.
Spin. Don't be scared. If you fall off the bike, get back on again. Just try not to pay attention to all the people who are laughing at you.

Love,

Me.

PS- Not to be long winded but I have two more quick little side notes to make.
1.) When calling a friend to complain about "non ball having self" do not ask if they are busy if you do not care what the answer is. Also, please refrain from asking them 20 questions when they have said they are busy, lest you have friends no longer.

2.) Do not be surprised that you have gained 3 pounds when you are supposed to be on a diet when you eat Pasta for dinner adorned with oven roasted garlic, sun dried tomatoes, succulent artichoke and lots and lots of olive oil. Food like that makes your rump shake, which is very alarming on an unborn fetus look-alike.

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Originally I planned on having this smoothie for breakfast as a healthy reward for going to Spin Class.
But I didn't go.

I tried. I did.
I scoped it out.
But all these crazy spinning chics were saving seats, and everyone came in all self assured and bicycle knowledge like, and I got scared.

I didn't even walk into the room.
I just stood outside and stalked the place.
I have issues.

Maybe tomorrow.
My girlfriend promises to hold my hand.

In the meantime, I'm drinking this smoothie anyway, because I completely kicked my butt on the elliptical for being such a pansy.

Coffee Protein Smoothie with a bit of banana thrown in. Fo-Shizzle.
Inspired by Female Fat loss Over Forty

Can I just say this smoothie is Fo' shizzle, my nizzle. With 176 calories and 20 grams of protein, this Smoothie is Dope. As in Good. Great. EXCELLENT! Not as in crack cocaine. Just thought I would clarify.

Serves 2. Or one hungry me.

Ingredients:

1 cup Soy milk (you can use any type of milk you like)
6 oz. vanilla fat free Greek Yogurt
1/4 tsp cinnamon
Dash of Nutmeg
1 TB Instant Coffee
1 cup of Ice
1 scoop Vanilla Protein Whey Powder
*2 TB of your fave sweetner, optional (choose something that dissolves easily, ie Splenda, honey, Agave, etc)

Directions:

1. Slap it in a blender. Blend. Pour it your glass. Say something crass. Drink it up fast.

THE BEST GERMAN CHOCOLATE CAKE YOU HAVE EVER EATEN - And some totes randomness

2012-01-18T11:49:00.000-06:00

AAAAAGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!

I'm frustrated.

My 2 year old baby was throwing up all over place yesterday. Total madness. She's feeling much better now, the house has been bleached and fumigated, so all is good. . . . i think.

My Christmas Tree is STILL up and decorated. Though, I haven't been turning the lights on.
At the moment that I finally went to take it down (I kid you not) Phoebe started projectile vomiting and well. . . .my Christmas tree is still up, ornaments, star and all.

Good news. I'm exercising on a regular basis. And I'm blogging.. . . .Yeah!!!
Bad news. I've been unable to figure out when to shower and brush my hair.

And the worst news yet. . . . .
My Bella, my lovely child who asks for nothing who is always happy, generous, and wonderful, is going to be completely heart broken when she finds out that she wasn't drafted by the softball team she wanted to play for. It's a long story that ends with Bella being a first round draft pick for another coach, and he wasn't willing to trade her.

Uuuggghhhh.

This totally sucks.

So let's take a look back to this weekend when Bella was happy. When she smiled brightly upon arriving at the American Girl Tea Party, dressed to the nines, completely matching her American Girl doll.

Look very closely.
We may not see that smile again for awhile.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Shit.

Can I say that? Should I say that?

My husband angel is sitting on my shoulder whisper yelling at me to watch my mouth. To stop cursing all over the Internet. To be more lady-like. I'm whisper yelling back. SHUT UP, you potty mouth hater. I like curse words. But then, I like that he thinks I'm a lady, so I blush and regain my composure.

Shoot. Gosh durn it. This is really bad news. REALLY BAD. I'm really trying to figure out how to put a spin on it.

Gosh Bella, you're such a good player that your old coach that never won any games drafted you. Yipppeeee!!!!

Winning isn't everything, it's how you lose the game!

Look on the bright side. . . .your uniform might be pink again. Maybe we can convince them to add rhinestones.

I think I'll make Mr. Woo give her the bad news. And I'll have this German Chocolate cake sitting in the dugout to ease her pain.

Because when life gets hard, and you don't know what the hell to do, I say eat chocolate. Lots and Lots of chocolate.

With caramel, coconut icing.

It's a must.

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PS- You may be wondering why I don't have any pictures of the enitre cake. It's my families fault. They ate the cake up so fast, that I was unable to stage any whole cake shots. So I'm sorry. . . .you'll just have to use your imagination . . . . but trust me. . .THIS . . .WILL. . . .KNOCK. . . .YOUR. . . .SOCKS. . . .OFF.

THE BEST GERMAN CHOCOLATE CAKE YOU HAVE EVER EATEN
ever so slightly adapted from David Lebovitz

*One more thing. That angel husband on my shoulder would like you to know that in his most humble opinion this is not a German Chocolate Cake. That in fact this is a delicious, delectable cake, but to him it is not German Chocolate. It comes out darker and richer than the more traditional German Chocolate Cakes. Now he has said his piece, and he wishes to retreat back to my shoulder where he will forever whisper in my ear and make me second guess all my moves today. Thank you.

Makes one 9 inch cake. 16 servings.

Ingredients:

For the cake:

2 oz bittersweet chocolate
2 oz., unsweetened chocolate, chopped
6 TB water
2 sticks unsalted butter, room temp.
1 1/2 cups sugar
4 large eggs, separated
2 cups all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon baking powder
1 teaspoon baking soda
½ teaspoon salt
1 cup buttermilk, at room temperature
1 teaspoon vanilla extract

For the filling:

1 cup heavy cream
1 cup sugar
3 large egg yolks
3 oz butter
½ teaspoon salt
1 cup pecans, chopped
1 1/3 cups grated coconut

For the syrup:

1 cup water
¾ cup sugar
2 tablespoons rum (Lebovitz uses dark rum), optional

For the chocolate icing:

8 ounces bittersweet or semisweet chocolate chips
2 tablespoons light corn syrup
1 ½ oz. unsalted butter
1 cup heavy cream

Directions:

1. Preheat oven to 350. Butter and flour two 9-inch cake pans. Line the bottoms with wax paper.

2. In a small microwavable glass container, melt both chocolates with 6 TB of water. Stir until smooth. Let cool.

3. Using an electric mixer, beat butter and 1 1/4 cup of sugar until light and fluffy. Beat in cooled melted chocolate. Then one at a time, add egg yolks.

4. In a separate bowl, combine flour, baking powder, baking soda, and salt. Mix half of the dry ingredients into the butter mixture, and then add the buttermilk, vanilla, and the rest of the dry ingredients.

5. In a separate bowl, beat the egg whites until they form soft peaks. Add 1/4 cup of the sugar and continue to beat until the peaks are stiff. Fold the stiff whites into the cake batter.

6. Pour batter evenly into the cake pans. Bake for 45 minutes or until a toothpick inserted comes out clean. Cool.

To Make the filling:

1. In a bowl, mix together, the butter, salt, coconut and pecan pieces. Set aside.

2. In a medium saucepan, mix together the cream, sugar, and egg yolks. Heat the cream mixture, and stir constantly until it begins to thicken and coats the back of a spoon. Remove from heat.

3. Pour cream mixture into the coconut mixture, and stir until the butter has melted. Cool completely.

For the syrup:

1. In a small saucepan, heat the sugar and water until all the sugar has melted. Remove from heat and add the liquor. Stir.

For the Icing:

1. In a medium sized bowl, place 8 oz. of chocolate with corn syrup and 1.5 oz of butter. Set aside.
2. Heat the cream until it just begins to boil. Pour over the chocolate, corn syrup and butter. Let stand one minute, then stir to smooth. Allow to cool to room temperature.

To assemble:

1. Remove the cakes from the cake pans and cut them both in half horizontally using a serrated knife.
2. Place the first layer onto the cake plate, brush with syrup, and spread with 3/4 cup of coconut filling. Place another layer of cake on top, and repeat the process until you have used every layer of cake.
3. Ice the sides of the cake with chocolate icing. Use a thin layer at first to hold in the crumbs. Place in the refrigerator to cool, and then re-ice the sides and make a decorative piping edge if you like! Enjoy!(It may seem like a lot of chocolate icing, but use it all. Trust me. You won’t be sorry.)

Quick and Classic Low Fat Banana Bread

2012-01-11T10:15:00.000-06:00

{Don't forget to enter The Beekman 1802 Heirloom Cookbook Giveaway!}
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -- - - -

I tell my 5 year old all the time "Don't grow up too fast. Stay short. Stay sweet."

"Okay, Mommy." She says. "I'll try."

And because she's be so compliant and trying to stay small for me, and she's cuter than all get out, Santa brought her something extra special this Christmas.

An Ipod touch.

Despite the fact that she just started coloring in the lines, and is barely on the verge of reading books, she has some how nailed down texting.

Here's a little peak.
Texting between a 5 year old and our next door neighbor who is 7.

Friend: Are u there?

Friend: Soldad?

Soledad: Yes.

Soledad: Do you wot to play at your Haws with scotr (scooter) and bics With Bella and Soledad

Friend: Yes at 1:00

Friend: Bye. Have to go.

New Conversation:

Soledad: Hi its Soledad. I mist you. Wen you wor gon. Dear Friend.

Friend: What did you say?
Friend: Do you have to take a nap. Does Bella have to rest

Soledad: No.

Friend: Why does bella don't have to?

Soledad: Because Bella is 7 years old.

Friend: Oh.

Soledad: favggb hehehgeggeg hennvveben enwenenfwfwvvw (????)

I think we may have created a monster. The cute, short, sweet kind.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Bananas. Bananas. Bananas.
It is totally crazy cakes over here.
5 year olds texting.

What craziness will ensue next?
It must be a sign of the times.

Good thing some things stay classic.
Like this bread.
Perfectly wholesome.
Split on the top.
Crunchy outer layer.
Soft sweet inner.
Low in fat.
Low in Calories.
High in yumminess.
The best things in life are forever.
And everything else. . . . well, we'll adjust.

Quick and Classic Low Fat Banana Bread
With only about 4 grams of fat per serving, 3 grams of fiber, and as little as 130 calories per serving, this snack packs a punch!
serves about 14

Ingredients

2 cups all-purpose flour (for even more fiber substitute 1 cup of all purpose flour for Whole Wheat)

3/4 teaspoon baking soda

1/2 teaspoon salt

1 cup sugar*

1/4 cup margarine/butter, melted (I like smart balance)

3 mashed very ripe bananas

1/3 cup buttermilk (no buttermilk? try using plain yogurt)

2 large eggs, beaten

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

1/2 cup chopped nuts (I like Walnut and Pecan)

Cooking spray

**Cutting down on sugar? Substitue 1/2 cup packed brown sugar and use in place of 1 c. white sugar.*

Directions

1. Preheat oven to 350. Line the bottom of a loaf pan (8 1/2 x 4 1/2 inch) with parchment or wax paper, and spray lightly with cooking spray. Set aside.

2. In a medium sized mixing bowl, add flour, baking soda, salt, and sugar. Mix to combine.

3. In another mixing bowl, combine the butter, bananas, and buttermilk. Add eggs and vanilla. Stir. Add to flour mixture, and stir until moist. Add nuts if using.

4. Pour batter into the loaf pan and bake for 1 hour or until a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean. Cool 10 minutes. Remove from pan and cool completely.

Try making a second loaf, slicing it up in placing it individually wrapped in the freezer. It'll be there waiting for you when you want a satisfying snack that you won't feel guilty about.

Winter Vegetable Soup, Fishing in the City Pool and A GIVEAWAY: The Beekman 1802 Heirloom Cookbook By Josh Kilmer-Purcell and Brent Ridge with Sandy Gluck

2012-01-09T14:13:00.000-06:00

Food Photography by Paulette Tavormina

It's raining catfish and dogs today.
I'm laughing hysterically to myself, even if you didn't quite get the joke.

I'm laughing because, as I sit here staring out my study window I'm . . .
A.) Reminiscing about what a fun time we had this weekend watching our 3 girls play in their season opener basketball games.
B.) Fondly remembering how Shelbi wrestled her a 3 pound catfish that she unhooked and grabbed with her bare hands from at our annual City Pool Fishing Extravaganza. . . . ALL BY HER SILLY SELF.
C.) and crazily laughing because I'm in denial of having to clean all those fish my kids caught that are currently sitting in a cooler frozen with eyes popped out.

If I have to tell that child one more time to stop just laying her pole around willy nilly, I'm going to explode. And. . .I promise if someone accidentally kicks it in the pool, I'm making her go in after it.

But this is it.
This is exactly the life I asked for.
Strong girls who aren't afraid to get dirty, BUT also paint their nails.
A life where we enjoy all that God has given, and are grateful for it.
A life where we fish in pools for sport. Suburbia meets Daniel Boone.
This is who we are.

The constant struggles.
The never ending cleaning.
The digging, the plowing, weeding, the mulching.
It is just like running a CRAZY Farm.

It's a simple life.
We work hard.
We play hard.
We enjoy the fruits of our labor.
This is what I want to pass onto my children.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

I'd also like to pass this cookbook onto them.

Wouldn't want them making me crap for dinner when I'm too old to care.
Kidding, kidding. What a horrible thing to say.

But for realz. . . . .this is a pretty neat cookbook.
It's set up just as life should be. By seasons. All the recipes are designed around what is fresh, in market, what the earth is giving us. . . . . .NOW.

The Beekman 1802 Heirloom Cookbook showcases heirloom fruits and vegetables and recipes from the authors (The Fabulous Beekman Boys) farm, family and friends.

"Each recipe is simple delicious, arranged by season, and intended for both every day and special occasions. From springtime pea pod risotto and summery strawberry shortcake to quick braised collards in autumn and yummy chicken and dumplings for a snowy winters day, this is a simple yet luscious farm-fresh fare that everyone will love."

BUT THE BEST PART. . . .is that it is made to pass on. With blank note spaces with every recipe and a special section with blank recipe cards designed for you to add your very own heirloom recipes. Genius. And special.

So special that I'm going to GIVEAWAY one copy of The Beekman 1802 Heirloom Cookbook.
As a late Christmas early Valentines present.
Because I lurv you so much.

TO ENTER:

Just answer the following question in the Comments section of this post:

"What are you passing on to the next generation? ” Smelly socks. Crazy Fishing in City Pool Skillz. Worn out bras? Inquiring minds want to know.

THE RULES

One entry per person, please. We wouldn't want pass on too much information to the future generations.

The Beekman 1802 Heirloom Cookbook GIVEAWAY will end Monday, January 16, 2012 at midnight CST. Winners will be announced on Tuesday, January 17, 2012. Entrants limited to US and Canada. They will be chosen randomly using http://www.random.org/

Good Luck!

- - - - - - - - - - -

AND THE WINNER IS. . . . . .

AMYSYNG

"i'm passing on my sense of the absurd"

Amy - Shoot me an email at nickiwoo.thehomeguru@gmail.com to claim your prize in the next 48 hours!!!

- - - - - - - - - -

And now for the recipe.
I went around and around about this.
Do I showcase Cheese Toast Topped Onion Soup or maybe the Caramelized Pear Bread Pudding, But on this very cold and rainy day, only the Winter Vegetable Soup will do.

Here's to family, love and the most perfect of soups.
Enjoy!

Food Photography by Paulette Tavormina

Winter

Vegetable Soup

Reprinted from The Beekman 1802 Heirloom Cookbook © 2011 by Brent Ridge, Josh Kilmer-Purcell, and Sandy Gluck. Permission from Sterling Epicure, an imprint of Sterling Publishing Co., Inc. Photography by Paulette Tavormina

in the middle of winter, root vegetables can be used to make this hearty vegetable soup. We’ve been known to spend a winter afternoon pouring boiling water over our raised beds trying to pry parsnips out of the frozen ground. In this recipe, the rutabagas are an especially nice note, adding a lovely earthy sweetness. Also called swedes, rutabagas are large, orange-fleshed turnips that are sold with a coating of wax to lengthen their shelf life.

2 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil

1 medium onion, coarsely chopped

3 cloves garlic, thinly sliced

4 teaspoons finely chopped fresh ginger

2 carrots, halved lengthwise and thinly sliced crosswise

4 medium rutabaga (about 6 ounces), peeled, quartered lengthwise, and thinly sliced

1 medium parsnip, halved lengthwise and thinly sliced

4 pound Yukon Gold potatoes, peeled, halved lengthwise, and thinly sliced crosswise

4 pound green cabbage, cut into 4-inch-wide strips

2 tablespoons tomato paste

3 4 cups Chicken Stock (page 17), or reduced-sodium canned broth

Salt

Freshly ground black pepper

2 tablespoons fresh lemon juice

1 tablespoon sugar

2 tablespoons fresh parsley leaves, for garnish

In a large saucepan, heat the oil over medium heat. Add the onion, garlic, and ginger and cook, stirring frequently, for 3 minutes. Add the carrots, rutabaga, and parsnip, and cook, stirring frequently, until the vegetables are crisp-tender, about 7 minutes.

Stir in the potatoes, cabbage, and tomato paste, stirring to coat. Add the stock and salt to taste and bring to a boil. Reduce to a simmer, cover, and cook until the vegetables are very tender, about 20 minutes. Stir in the lemon juice and sugar, and season with salt and pepper. Serve garnished with parsley leaves

AND THE WINNER IS. . . . . .

AMYSYNG

"i'm passing on my sense of the absurd"

Amy - Shoot me an email at nickiwoo.thehomeguru@gmail.com to claim your prize in the next 48 hours!!!

Disclaimer: I was given this book to review, and I said thank you very much. They did not pay me. I did not pay them. They said do you want to give one away? I said yes. They said okay. I said i liked the book, because I really did like the book, not because they told me to. Because they didn't. But they were happy. And I were happy. And I hope you were happy too.

How To Keep Your Dog Smelling Fresh. . . . .with products you already have at home.

2012-01-04T08:58:00.000-06:00

Me: I need to go to the doctor in the morning. Do you want to come with me?

Mom: Sure. Why do you have to go to the doctor?

Me: Oh nothing serious. I need to see the dermatologist for a follow up visit. My face just gets really rosy, with these fine little bumps. Kinda like a heat rash on my cheeks.

Mom: *silence.* Oh.

Me: Don't worry. It's called Acne Rosacia and she's just going to look and see what progress we've made. Probably just change my prescription up a bit. It's hardly even noticeable.

Mom: Oh really. Well I've been wondering why your cheeks are so pink all the time. And now that you mention it, you do have quite a lot of bumps on your face.

Me: Thanks for noticing.
Are you coming or not?

- - - - - - - - -

I guess I should be thankful.
She cares, right? She notices EVERYTHING.

Look. Here she is. . . . . .
noticing everything.

I told you.

If a person is going to care that you got a 20 pack of toilet paper on sale at the grocery, that person is only going to be your mom, and she's going to notice bumps on your face.

AND
She's going to tell you about it.

Another thing she kept telling me about this week was that my dog stinks.
Not my house. Thank God. I would have passed out.
But poor sweet Lucky, got a few turned up noises from sweet Nana.

She said that her crazy, rambunctious grand-dog smelled unbearably horrible. Due to his rancid smell and overall dog mustiness.

"Oh come on, Mommy. He doesn't smell bad. Well. . . .sometimes when he's been outside for more than 5 minutes, but that smell goes away quick."
"No, Nicole. It does not. Have you sprayed him with that dog fragrance spray?"

"Yes!" I replied.

"Have you given him a bath lately?"

"Of course I gave him a bath. Like TWO DAYS AGO!" I yelled.

"Maybe if you give him a hair cut just to even his coat out, he'll at least look better, and then maybe the doggy smell wont be quite so unbearable."

"What hair? There is nothing to cut!!!! Well. . .not much anyway." I countered frustrated.

But in my mind, I knew. If she says he stinks. He stinks. No need to get my panties all in a ruffle.

So this is what we did.
And she loved him more.
She petted him more.
Wasn't quite so disgusted with him.
And I even thought I saw him sitting on her lap once or twice.

How To Make Your Dog Smell Fresh, Fresh, Fresh (with stuff you already have laying around the house)

What You Need:

Remedy #1
Spray Bottle
Apple Cider Vinegar
Water

Remedy #2
Baking Soda

What To Do:

For Remedy #1

1. Fill a water bottle, 1/2 with apple cider vinegar, and the other 1/2 with water. Spray on dog. Be careful not to get it in his eyes.
(For about 3 minutes your dog might smell like pickles. But the smell dissipates in a few minutes and he'll just smile like a fresher version of his former self :)

For Remedy #2 (Do this outside if you don't want your floor having coat of baking soda. However, if you do it over your carpet, you can just vacuum it up and it will freshen your carpet as well.)

1. Dust your dog with baking soda, rub in. Allow the dog to shake off. Brush the dogs coat to remove any excess baking soda.

Cut Out Sugar Cookies and the Easiest Sugar Cookie Icing

2012-01-04T06:19:00.001-06:00

Waiting for Nana and Santa's arrival. The kids made up Nana's bed with fresh sheets, pillows topped with chocolates. A bottle of water and sweet notes with drawings were placed on her bedside table.

If you look really close, there is a Shelf Elf crammed into the center of the chandelier. How in the world did he get in there? Probably spying on the 11 and 5 year old. It was a little dicey there for awhile.

Making cookies at 9 pm on Christmas Eves's Eve. Bad idea.

That's my stocking. Not sure if Santa is trying to tell me something.

Nana. Don't yell. I cropped half your face out. Nobody will know its you in the Pooh Bear Pajamas. Promise.

christmas breakfast.

I'm not quite ready for the Christmas season to be over.
So I've convinced my husband to leave up the decorations until the weekend.

I already miss the music being played 24/7 around my house, and the little voices singing Feliz Navidad incessantly. I miss the whispering about presents, the constant search for the Shelf Elf, and the daily notes left in the fireplace for Santa Clause.

It's all rather depressing really.
So after mashing through stores of old pictures to remind myself of all the fun things that come after Christmas and New Years, I've decided to plunge myself face forward into a steady fury of household projects.

Maybe hanging some curtains.
Finishing Shelbi's bathroom (that I started in August).
Painting pictures. That I will convince my husband are kin to Van Gogh, and that he should be happy to stare at for the rest of his life.
Organizing.
Making shelves and painting murals and lots of other stuff that I have been wanting to do since we moved into this house 3 1/2 years ago.

Oh. And cooking healthy.
Really healthy.
Because seriously, I ate an entire Pecan Pie over the course of 2 weeks.
Which might not be soooooo bad if it had been a normal pie.
But this was like some mega crazy big dreamy caramelly lusciously nutty pie that served like 50.

So long Christmas.
Welcome New Year.

My butt has been waiting for you.

- - - - - - - - - -

Over the break we made these cookies.
They are quite delicious and not too sweet.
Coupled with the icing, divine.

We still have a few left. . . . .
That I think might be calling my name.

Cut Out Sugar Cookie Dough

adapted from Allrecipes

Ingredients

1 1/2 cups butter, softened

2 cups white sugar

4 eggs

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

5 cups all-purpose flour

2 teaspoons baking powder

1 teaspoon salt

Directions

1. In a large mixing bowl, beat together butter and sugar until light and fluffy. Add eggs one at a time. Add vanilla. Stir in flour, baking powder, and salt. Cover and chill for at least one hour or until dough become very firm and cold.

2. Preheat oven to 400 F. Roll out dough onto a floured surface to about 1/4 inch thick. Cut into shapes using cookie cutters. Place cookies 1 inch apart onto a lined ungreased baking sheet.

3. Bake 6 to 8 minutes. Cool before icing.

Sugar Cookie Icing
Super Easy to Make. Use liquid food coloring to make the colors pop. The colors stay rich and the icing glides on smooth and glossy. Add a little more corn syrup if the icing is too thick.

Ingredients

1 cup powdered sugar

2 teaspoons milk

2 teaspoons light corn syrup

1/4 teaspoon almond extract

assorted food coloring

Directions

1. In a small bowl, combine powdered sugar and milk. Stir until smooth. Stir in corn syrup and almond extract until the icing is smooth and glossy. If it is too thick, add corn syrup until it is the consistency that you would like.

2. Divide icing into separate containers and color with food coloring. Pipe, brush, pour, or dip cookies. Allow to dry and harden.

How to Steam Clean Your Microwave Lickety Split with Vinegar and Water

2011-12-21T07:35:00.004-06:00

I looked into her eyes, and there was sadness.

"What's wrong?" I whispered.

Nothing but a blank stare. She looked pale, her eyes droopy. In the ten seconds before it happened she just kept shaking her head signaling, no.no.no.

I leaned over to hold her face, to beg her to tell me what was making her so gloomy. Then.. . . .

She threw up.
1, 2, 3, 4, 5. . . . .no I think it was 6 times. . .all over the gym floor. All over her cute little jump suit. Inside of my favorite red leather purse.

In front of . . . .20 or so onlookers.

It was the projectile type.
The type that flies out of the mouth, makes an arch, and then jets onto the wall, splashes onto the floor, and smells like death.

It wouldn't stop.
I pulled her to me, and whispered, "Oh baby. Are you okay?"

And then she thew up again. This time down my shirt, in the open spot between my boobs and my bra. It held the throw up just like a cup.

I sat the baby on the floor. Turned her face into the corner. "Its okay sweetheart. Mommy is going to get you some medicine." Phoebe was looking bluer and bluer.

I yelled to the 7 year old. "Bella, go get some paper towels."

She returned swiftly, 10 seconds later with one tiny piece of paper towel.

"Bells, does that look like it's going to pick up all this???????"

"Uh. No."

"THEN GO! Get me a A LOT. MORE THAN YOU THINK. And run! No! Don't run. We'll call attention to ourselves. Walk fast."

"OK."

And ten seconds later she's back, lickety split, with 500,000 paper towels. All dragging behind her, on the gym floor, in the middle of a basketball drill, all ribboning on the floor behind her and around the corner.

Yeah. Way to look inconspicuous.

I clean up the mess.
Walk my stinky walk of shame holding my baby as I try not to slip and fall (cause its on my shoes too) as I slink by the other parents.
I take the baby to the car.
Warwick, shows up just in the knick of time (late from his business trip), so I'm able to bring her home.

I throw all our clothes in the wash, bathe her, kiss her, and snuggle with her and a barf bucket on the couch while we watch A Charlie Brown Christmas.

She rests her head on my shoulder, and pulls her tiny little hands around to stroke my face. Every now and then she giggles, or she mumbles what a bad woggy Snoopy is.

Towards the end, she reaches up and kisses me on my cheek.
She looks at me for a moment, and says "Thank you Mama."

And I tear up.
She didn't have to thank me. I'm her Mama. I love her. I would do anything for her.
The next morning when I asked her if her tummy still hurts, she told me "No. It's all better."
And then she said it again.

"Thank you Mama." And I started to cry.

She's so little to love so much.
I'll gladly clean up her crap anyday.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

It's crazy cakes over here I tell you.

Soledad just threw up in the car last night. Guess we've got the stomach bug going around my house.
Luckily, it appears as if the vomiting only occurs in one short time period, and then it's over.

So I'll be cleaning up around here and trying to get ready for the big Christmas Day!!!

Nana comes manana. I'm so excited.
So in addition to disinfecting the house so we don't spread our germy germs, I think I might need to clean out my microwave so I don't gross Nana the heck out.

It totally looks like our crazy cakes exploded all over it.

How to Steam Clean Your Microwave Lickety Split with Vinegar and Water

What You Need:

Microwave :)
3/4 cup vinegar
3/4 cup water
Glass microwave-safe bowl (I use a 2 cup pyrex measuring cup)

What To Do:

1. In your small microwaveable glass bowl mix 1/2 cup white distilled vinegar and 1/2 cup water in a microwave-safe bowl.

2.Bring it to a rolling boil inside the microwave (This takes about 3-5 minutes).

3. The steam will loosen baked-on food. Wipe clean.

Simple Corn Salad with Tomatoes and Bacon

2011-12-14T09:17:00.000-06:00

"So, wait. Say that again." I said listening intently as I pushed my grocery cart down the aisle stopping to mull over whether or not it was cheaper to buy a 15 oz jar of sliced pickles or purchase the 30 oz, and slice them myself.

The Christmas music was playing louder than usual, Mariah Carey's All I want for Christmas is You. I couldn't quite concentrate on shopping, because my phone conversation and the music was humming in my ear.

"Okay, okay. That sounds good. Really firm, but logical. I should probably write this down." But before I could dig in my purse to find a pen, she started to wrap things up. I think she was tired of telling me the same thing over and over again.

"Look Nicole. You don't need to write this down. Just look her in the eye and say, I have made up my mind. End of discussion. She'll be upset. She may not talk to you, but she'll get over it, AND she'll know there are consequences to her actions." says my sister, flatly.

"Sounds easy." I choked.

"It is easy." she retorted.

"Kay then." I didn't want to get off the phone.

"Go. Do it. It'll be easier than you think. Call me later and tell me how it went. Bye."

"Bye."

Click.

I checked out with the cashier, grabbed my groceries and proceeded to take the long walk home. Figuratively. I was only 5 minutes from the house, and I drove. But you get my point. I kept replaying the conversation in my head over and over again.

I called my sister. Told her what a horrible predicament I'm in.
I told her that Shelbi wants me to play in the Mother/Daughter Softball game, but I refuse to.
Shelbi calls WHILE I'm on the phone with said sister, and she's crying uncontrollably because I won't go to said game.
I tell my sister there is a new set of circumstances. One including a crying child.
Sister completely baffles me and says, "So what. She needs to learn her lesson."
I stand dumbfounded.
I get off the phone and throw up 10 times.

I wipe my mouth, and I walk into the house. My kid is laid out on the couch, legs outstretched with her red softball uniform on and red crying eyes to match.

I kneel down next to her. "Why are you crying?" I whisper.
"I don't know." she lies.
"You must know why you're crying. If you can't tell me, then how can I help?"
She shrugs.
"Does it have to do with the softball game?"
She nods her head in agreement.
"Are you upset that I'm not going?"
Another affirmative nod.
"Well, you know why I won't go, don't you?"
She shakes her head no, and sniffles a few more times.

"Because you have told me every day for the past 3 months, YOU HATE SOFTBALL. And now you want to go to this game, you hate, and I don't get it. And the softball season is over, and I don't even know why they keep wanting to prolong it. You've had a rotten attitude lately, and I think you need to understand that there are consequences to your actions. You can't just run around being mean and bossy, and then snap your fingers and expect the world to fall at your feet. It doesn't work that way. If you would have given the sport a chance, I could see. But you didn't. You complained incessantly. Over and over again. That is why I WON'T go."

She sniffles more. Tears pooling in her eyes. "It's just that all the other Mom's will be there, and I thought it would be . . . . . .fun."

Holding my head in my hands, "I just don't see how I can do it. And I have to take Bella to a birthday party. How about this? You go with Daddy to the game, and after I'll take you to McDonald's and Christmas shopping, and we can spend time together then?"

"Okay. No problem." She half smiles and gets up, ready to go.

As she starts to stand, visions of her as a little girl tugging on my pant leg, leaning over to kiss me, crawling into my lap, all flash before my eyes. She's growing up so fast. She's almost taller than me now. She doesn't want to be with me as much anymore, and now she's asking to me to spend time with her, and I'm trying to teach her a lesson.

So I rush to change clothes.
Pack up the car and go play in that softball game.
I take Bella to her birthday party, and Shelbi to McDonald's and Christmas shopping afterwards.
She never complained once. In fact I think I saw her smile 1 million times. And giggled a thousand more.
And I think she was the happiest little girl in the universe.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

I've noticed lately that when Mr. Woo and I come back from our late night Christmas parties I always fall asleep on the drive home. And. . . . . I always awaken to him shaking me with my mouth wide open, as he announces we are home.

Apparently, when I sleep while in a sitting position, my bottom jaw releases like a trap door and my bicuspids are visible for all to see.

Uuuhhh. That has got to be completely unattractive of me.
Why do I sleep with my mouth open?

Could it be that I'm in awe of my questionable parenting skills.
Maybe I'm dreaming about catching the softball with my mouth to save the game that we lost. Mom's 10 Girls 22.
Possibly, I'm about to sing a Christmas carole, but Mr. Woo wakes me up before I can belt one out.
Or could it be. . . .
that I'm dreaming of Christmas dinner. At the exact time when the fork meets my mouth and I open it. . .oh . so. . .slowly savoring the grandness that is this salad.

Simple flavors.
Simple to make.
A new family favorite.
It was the only dish that had no leftovers at Thanksgiving.
Open Wide.

Simple Corn Salad with Tomatoes and Bacon

Ingredients:

2 bags of frozen sweet shoepeg corn, thawed
3 large Roma tomatoes, diced
2 scallions, chopped finely
1/2 large red onion, chopped
1/2 green bell pepper, chopped
Handful of Cilantro, chopped
4 strips of bacon, cooked and crumbled
2 TB olive oil
Salt and Pepper, to taste

Directions:

1. To a large bowl add corn, tomatoes, scallions, red onion, bell pepper, cilantro, and bacon. Stir to combine. Drizzle with olive oil and season with salt and pepper. Mix well.
2. Eat it, refrigerate, make it a day in advance. Tastes great no matter what. I like it as is, but it would taste yummy with tortilla chips. But then again, what doesn't taste yummy with tortilla chips?

Holiday Cooking: The Very Best Homemade Green Bean Casserole

2011-12-09T05:29:00.001-06:00

Last night when I went to sleep, I pulled the covers over my face, grabbed my husbands arm, threw it over my chest, backed him into the farthest recesses of our bed and fell asleep.

I was very comfortable.

At 4 am, I woke up because I couldn't feel him anymore, so I popped my head up, crawled back over to him and nudged my head into the pocket that sits between his underarm and his right chest breast, and I fell back to sleep.

Because. . .
I was comfortable.
I like to be comfortable.
This is one of the main reasons why I do anything. Because my ultimate goal is comfort.

Why do I cook? Food comforts me.
Why do I put up Christmas lights? Subdued twinkling lights, lull me.
Why did I marry this man? Because he has ridges in his body that fit me perfectly and he's a really nice blanket pillow. And this my friends, is comfortable.

With all of that said, there are times in my life when I have not been comfortable, and I don't look back on them fondly.

The year my parents made me join gymnastics. Bad idea.
The day I watched Tommy Granger eat boogers at his desk while we watched 1000 Leagues under the Sea. Unbearable.
And two years ago. When I was forced to play a Mother/Daughter softball game. . . .using my left hand/arm. I think I died a thousand deaths.

And I promise, I'm not over-reacting. It is physically painful for me. I hate it. And, I'm being asked to do it again.

Not join gymnastics.

Play softball.
A Mother/Daughter game. And I don't wanna.

They may not make me play with my left hand, I'm really not sure. But it doesn't matter, because what I'm really afraid of is that the lady that wears the brown mu mu and walks dragging her feet will be better than me. And that I won't be able to hit the ball to save my life. And that if I do, I'll start to run and my feet will suddenly grow 10 inches and I'll have to run to first base with my toes jutting out like a clown. And my husband will be watching. .. .and he'll think, "Damn. I thought she was athletic. Why does she run hunched over like that? Is that her butt jiggling that way? Why is she sweating profusely? Is she panting like a dog? Boy. That's unattractive."

And he will hate that he married me, because I'm an embarrassment. And my kids will be ashamed because I suck at softball. And the other moms will whisper horrible harsh things about my sweat pants and my t-shirt not matching or being basketball fashion and not softball fashion. IF THERE IS EVEN SUCH A THING. IS THERE SUCH A THING?

Uuuggghhh.

The coach will think I'm pathetic.
And I won't even be able to participate in the barbecue afterwards because I'll want to puke.

And so I don't want to go.
Me thinks, I won't go.

And probably my daughter will hate me for it. Even though, she has quite seriously SCREAMED in my face that she hates softball. Because, it's boring.

But it won't matter. She'll probably disown me for this one action that I am about to inflict upon her. Because it means she'll miss a PARTY for a sport she hates. And PARTY in her book always trumps EVERYTHING.

No matter.
She'll survive.
It's my duty to make her miserable.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -- - - - - - -

It's a right of childhood.

In order to understand life little one, you must endure something miserable.
- - - Nicki Woo, Home Guru

Also a right of childhood, Green Bean Casserole.

In order to love life little one, you must find comfort in things that do not normally bring you comfort.
- - - - -Nicki Woo, Home Guru

Yes. Like Green Beans.
Like fresh green beans (not canned) steamed to perfection. Tossed in a creamy sauce (that did not come in a can) ladled and nestled next to mushrooms, bell pepper, and onions, and then topped with crunchy ribbons of sweet fried onions (again. . .not from a can).

Simply done. Harmony in your mouth.
Life is as it should be.

Homemade Green Bean Casserole (No can required)
I got this recipe from my blogging pal, Polwig. She is a Cook's Cook. Always preparing the most delightful things on her blog.

I made this for Mr. Woo's Holiday dinner at work, and it was gobbled up. I was hoping it would win 'Best Side" but of course, they decided not to have a competition this this year. Damnit. I'm sure it would have won. Anyway, here's the recipe, slightly different from Polwig's which can be found HERE. I used red onion, rather than shallots (because shallots were expensive at my grocer and I really love red onions). And I didn't put my green beans in an ice bath because. . .1.) I like them on the softer side and 2.)I can be a little lazy like that.

But I think everything else is pretty much the same.

Enjoy!

Ingredients:

6 tablespoons unsalted butter, plus more for greasing the dish

1 large yellow onion, chopped

1\2 red bell pepper, chopped

1 pound your favorite mushrooms, cut into bite size pieces (I used baby portabellas)

2 teaspoons coarse salt

1/2 teaspoon freshly ground pepper

1 1/2 pounds young green beans, trimmed (If they are young and small, I don't cut them. But if they are long, you may want to cut them in half)*

1/2 cup plus 2 tablespoons all-purpose flour

2 cups milk, (I used 2%)

1 pinch cayenne pepper, optional

1 pinch grated nutmeg

1 cup grated Parmesan cheese

1/4 cup breadcrumbs

1/4 cup canola oil

1/2 red onion, cut in half and then into thinly sliced strips

*Make things even easier and buy the fresh green beans that are in the steam ready bag.

Directions

1. Bring a large pot of water to boil. Add the green beans. Boil until the green beans are tender. 4-5 minutes for beans with bite or 6-8 minutes if you like them softer. Drain. Set aside.

2. In a large skillet, melt 2 TB butter over medium heat. Add mushrooms and turn heat to high (high heat helps to pull out moisture and not make your mushrooms mushy and weird). Cook until mushrooms are browned, remove from skillet. Lower heat to medium and add onion and bell pepper. Cook for 3-5 minutes longer or until the other vegetables are soft. Season with 1 tsp of salt and 1/4 tsp pepper. Add mushroom and onion mixture to green beans and set aside.

3. In the same skillet that you used to cook the vegetables, melt 4 TB butter over a medium-low heat. Add 1/4 cup of flour to the melted butter while whisking constantly. After 2 minutes, add milk and continue to whisk until thickened, about 3 minutes. Stir in cayenne (if using), nutmeg, and 1 tsp salt and 1/4 tsp pepper. Remove from heat and cool slightly. Pour over bean mixture and stir to combine.

4. To a buttered 13 X 9 inch baking dish, add half of the green bean mixture. Sprinkle with half of the grated Parmesan. Add the other half of the green beans to the casserole. Sprinkle on Parmesan and bread crumbs. At this point you can cover and refrigerate until ready to serve. Make it a day ahead if you like, or move to step 5 and serve it now :)

5. Make the Friend Onion Strings: Heat oil in a skillet over medium high heat. Toss red onion strings with 4 TB of flour. Fry the onions in the skillet until they are golden brown. Dry on paper towels and let cool. Place in a sealed container or Ziploc bag until ready to serve.

6. If your casserole has been in the refrigerator, let it sit out on the counter and come to room temperature. Heat broiler, and cook covered for about 10 minutes. Remove cover and place back under the broiler and cook for 30 seconds longer, or until lightly browned. Sprinkle with Fried Onion Strings and serve.

Best Slow Cooker White Chili

2011-12-06T05:00:00.001-06:00

What I learned this past week:

1. My husband knows how to River Dance. Well. And he's not afraid to do it at his Company Christmas Party.

2. I have no balls. When I tell a hairdresser to cut my hair just above my shoulders, and she cuts it just below my ears, I will emphatically proclaim I love it, because I don't want to hurt her feelings, and then I will go home and slap myself around a bit.

3. My husband thinks my new short hair is cute. . . . . .because he thinks I am cute.

4. I love that guy in #3.

5. I will go to any length to make soup on a cold day. Or a ummm. . . .a cool day.

6. I'm addicted to dumplings. They must be small, about the size you'd get if a cranberry made love to baby carrot. I make double the amount than any normal person would make, and put them in my soup. Then I pick them out and eat them at five minute intervals until dinner time. By dinner, only a normal amount are left, and I'm full, but I only serve the children a few in their bowls because I don't feel as if they appreciate them enough.

7. Every bowl of soup that touches my lips is adorned with sour cream and cilantro. It's a problem.

8. I can't stop making soup.

Chunky Vegetable Beef Stew

9. Vodka shots are a mother. 2 Vodka shots, 4 Rum shots, and 3 glasses of red wine are a grandmother. This is not a compliment. Patron shots on the other hand are a brother. And I'm not sure what that means.

10. I am no longer 21. Nobody cares if I'm moderately ill from the night before. They still want to eat.

11. My favorite part of Christmas is the 24 days before.

12. I'm one of those people who really does think life is better at Christmas time. Christmas parties, beautiful cookies, and lights. Lots of lights. It makes my heart sing.

I like it when the star is whop-sided.

This is the same Manger Scene that sat in front of my childhood home.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

I love this time of year because I'm such a corny little gusher. I believe in all things Christmas and try my hardest to make my life the image of the Lexus Christmas Commercial mixed with the Hallmark commercials with a touch of that Coca Cola commercial with the big fat Santa where he winks into the camera before or after slushing down his cool and refreshing drink. Love that guy.

I want lights twinkling all over the house.
I want clean kids in flannel pajamas tucked tight into their beds. . . . . . reading books to fall asleep.
I want homemade cookies in the oven.
And I want soup.
Lots of it.
Cooked slow.
Served hot.
So I can sit, relax, and remember that life is beautiful, if only I take the time to notice.

Best Slow Cooker White Chili
Working all day? Too tired to cook? Don't want to sit around and baby a pot of boiling soup on the stove? I hear you. I feel you. No worries. You can still have soup. Just make it in your slow cooker and life again will be good.

inspired by 150 Best Slow Cooker Recipes by Judith Finlayson (check out the book, there is another 149 top dish recipes you might like to treat your self to.)

Ingredients:

2 15 oz. cans white kidney beans
2 TB Canola oil, divided
1 pound ground chicken/turkey
2 onions, finely chopped
6 garlic cloves, minced
1 TB ground cumin
1 TB dried oregano
1 tsp salt
1/2 tsp black pepper
1 15 oz. can diced tomatoes, with juice
4 cups chicken stock
1 1/2 cups shredded Monterrey Jack cheese (plus more for topping)
1 - 4.5 oz. can of diced mild green chiles, drained
1 to 2 jalapeno peppers (optional)
Sour Cream
Cilantro, chopped
tortilla chips
Additional Cheese for garnish

Directions:

1. In a medium sized pot heat 1 TB of oil over medium high heat. Add ground meat and cook until no longer pink, about 4 minutes. Drain. Transfer meat to the slow cooker.

2. Using the same pot, add the remaining 1 TB of oil and onions. Cook until translucent, about 3 minutes. Add garlic, cumin, oregano, salt and pepper and cook for one minute longer. Add tomatoes with juice and chicken broth and bring to boil. Cook until liquid has reduced by 1/3rd, about 5 minutes.

3. Add beans to slow cooker, and pour tomato mixture in as well. Stir to combine. Cover, and cook on low for 6 hours or High for 3 hours. At the end of the allotted time, using a potato masher, mash half of the beans in the pot to make the soup thicker.

4. Stir in cheese, mild green chiles and jalapeno pepper (if using). Cover and cook on high for 30 minutes longer or until cheese is melted and peppers are tender. Spoon into bowls and top with sour cream, cilantro, cheese, and tortilla chips!

Holiday Salad: Kale with Dried Cranberries, Roasted Pumpkin Seeds, Almonds, Candied Ginger and Orange Dressing

2011-11-29T05:43:00.001-06:00

Warwick: Nicole. I'm really sorry about last night.

Me: Sorry? Why are you sorry?

Warwick: Because I was snoring so much. I don't know why I was having such a hard time breathing.

Me: Oh. That's okay.

Warwick: I should have just gotten up and used Saline Drops. They helped a lot this morning when I got up.

Me: Well, don't worry about it. . . .I'm glad you're feeling better . . . .and you know. . . .I'd rather sleep next to you snoring, than not sleep next to you at all.

Warwick: Really? I never would have known that from the kick in the ribs you gave me last night when I was snoring.

Me: Ooops. Sorry.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
I really did mean it.
I would rather sleep next to him snoring ALL up in my ear, giving me NO rest at all, driving me bloody mad, if it meant the alternative was not sleeping next to him at all.

And honestly, I didn't mean to kick him. Well. . . .that hard anyway.
I guess I just don't know my own strength.
It must be all this Kale Salad I've been eating lately.

I'm strong like a whale, 'cause I eat's me Kale.
I'm Nicki Woo the Rib Kicker of her man.

(might need to work on that last line).

Holiday Kale Salad with Cranberries, Almonds, Pumpkin Seeds, and Crystallized Ginger What I like best about this salad, besides the fact that it is completely delicious, is that you can dress it ahead of time, and it will never get soggy. The Kale leaves can stand up to whatever you throw at them.

I first tried this salad at Central Market when I went to visit my girlfriend in Austin. She promised I would love it and I did. Fell head over heals in love in fact. Central market serves this salad with an Orange Sesame Dressing which was quite nice. Below is my version without the sesame added, because I made it on the fly on Thanksgiving (and two other times since) and I didn't have any sesame oil. And I loved it just the same. Here is the concoction I came up with. . . .

Ingredients:
Kale, washed and cleaned
Raw Almond Slivers, handful
Dried Cranberries, handful
Roasted and Salted Pumpkin Seeds (Pepitas), handful
Crystallized Ginger (Candied Ginger), 6-8 pieces chopped up finely*

Orange Dressing:
1/2 cup Orange Juice
1/2 cup Canola Oil
1 TB Soy Sauce
2 TB Apple Cider Vinegar
3 TB Sugar

Directions:

1. Remove Kale leaves from the hard stem. Cut into bight size pieces. Set aside.

2. In a skillet, with the heat on medium, toast almond slivers for about 3-5 minutes or until golden brown. Set aside.

3. Make the Orange Dressing. In a jar, combine orange juice, canola oil, soy sauce, vinegar and sugar. Place a lid on top. Shake to combine. Set aside.

4. In a large bowl, place half of chopped up Kale. Sprinkle half of the cranberries, pumpkin seeds, ginger, and almonds. Drizzle with dressing. Repeat with the remaining kale, cranberries, pumpkin seeds, ginger and almonds. Drizzle with more dressing, serve.

*PS - This is what candied/crystallized looks like just in case you didn't know :) You can find it in the spice isle in little jars already in bit size pieces, or if your grocer has a bulk bin section, often they sell it there as well. No candied ginger? Try drid pineapple instead.

Oh. That's okay.

Thanksgiving Eve Dinner: Healthy Choice Top Chef Cafe Steamers

2011-11-23T13:21:00.001-06:00

This is where I am today. In my car, on my way to my sister’s house, typing away to you because you’re such a great listener.

It’s 24 hours before Thanksgiving Dinner is due on the table, and I’m stressed the mess out.

I went to Walmart at midnight, Tom Thumb at 6am, and still I have no crystallized ginger. Guess what I’ll be making from scratch later on today. Hope it’s easy.

My hair is scraggly, I want to get it chopped off, and Warwick got all tiffy because I prefer to get my locks cut at inappropriate times. Meaning when I should be roasting a turkey.

My sister hates me, because well, she’s my sister. Which is fine by me, because I hate her too. I’m betting that she’ll love me once again tomorrow when she tastes my Drunken Brined Turkey or Lemon Meringue Pie. If not, oh well, more for me.

And now, my destiny is such that I am going to sequester myself to the kitchen, chin down, elbows tucked in,madly cooking my way into Thanksgiving Day.

Here’s what’s on our menu.. . . . .

Turkey & Honey-Glazed Ham

Kale Salad (Kale with dried cranberries, toasted slivered almonds, crystallized ginger, roasted pumpkin seeds, and orange sesame dressing)

Corn, Tomato, Scallion and Bacon Salad

Watergate Salad

Rolls and Cranberry Jelly

Green Bean Casserole, Sweet Potato Casserole, Macaroni and Cheese, Dirty Rice, Cornbread Dressing, Mustard Greens

Chocolate Pecan Pie, Traditional Pecan Pie, German Chocolate Cake, Almond Cherry Bars, and Lemon Meringue.

And all of this will be cooked soon. Very soon.

And my children will expect to eat. Which they will. TOMORROW.

Because whose bright idea was it to feed children on the day BEFORE Thanksgiving. That’s impossible. Unless I order up a pizza, or go by the burger joint, and slide greasy Chinese down their throats.

But I look at their beautiful little greedy faces and I just can’t do it.

Not that I’m opposed to fast food. I’m not. But, I just feel as if we are going to subject ourselves to a gluttonous fever of starches, desserts and tryptophan then one must approach it carefully, with at least a days worth of nutritious healthy foods to adequately provide a pillow of comfort for the big day.

It’ll help us maximize our feast filling capacities.

So instead, for dinner I’ll be serving Healthy Choice Top Chef Inspired Café Steamers. Pop them in the microwave for 3 minutes, and guess what. Dinner is served.

What I like about it:

It’s easy and fast.

It delicious. You can taste the freshness and quality of high quality ingredients. Bits of garlic, fresh tomatoes, basil leaves tickling your tongue (Chicken Marguerita with Balsamic Sauce)

The steaming technology (or ummm. . .steam dish with holes in it) lets the pasta cook al dente, while the veg steams to the perfect crispness.

It comes in a plethora of flavors to please the multitude of palettes in my family. . . . .

Barbeque Seasoned Steak with Red Potatoes

Chicken Fresca with Chardonnay

Chicken Linguini with Red Pepper Alfredo

Chicken Margherita with Balsamic

Grilled Chicken Marinara with Parmesan

Grilled Chicken Pesto with Vegetables

Grilled Vegetables Mediterranean with Rice

Roasted Chicken Marsala with Mushrooms

AND. . . . .The PIECE DE RESISTANCE. . . . . . . . .

The suggested retail price is $2.75 - $3.50 (was only $2.48 at my Wal-Mart) which is cheaper than anything I would have purchased from a fast food joint.

So, my friends, I hope your day is going well, and you’re not a crazy mess like me. But if you are, do this one little thing for yourself. DON’T COOK DINNER TONIGHT. Let someday else do it for you.

It could be the one thing that saves Thanksgiving.

Or any day for that matter.

- For more information, visit www.healthychoice.com or www.bravotv.com/showdown

Disclaimer: This is post was sponsored by Healthy Choice and their new line of meals inspired Top Chef. I was invited to participate in this campaign through my association with The Motherhood. But as always, all opinions are mine, and I do really feel as if these meals are the shiznit. Which means good. Great. Delightful. Yummy. I could eat these for every meal. Yes, that is what that means. You can look it up. J

Healthy Choice Twitter Handle: @Healthy_Choice

Healthy Choice Facebook Page: www.Facebook.com/HealthyChoice

Breaking Dawn Part 1 Movie Review - please tell me you're not surprised

2011-11-21T06:57:00.001-06:00

Hi.

I'm back.

Sorry I've been gone so long. I didn't intend for it to be this way. It's just that I had to go see Breaking Dawn with my bestie. And I had good intentions of typing away to you at 3 am all my thoughts about the movie immediately after the midnight showing, but I was in a total daze.

Let me show you why.

So then I started thinking "Oh my goodness. Why am I behaving this way? I love to talk to you. Why won't my fingers type. Why won't my brain work? Why can't I stop thinking about this man, and this girl, and these werewolves, and this family? Why? Oh, why?"

So I grabbed my bestie and we went to see the movie again. . . .so that we could get to the root of the problem.

And that didn't work. It only got me more worked up. The music from the movie started swirling around in my head, flashes of babies chomping on their Mommies (which really does happen) and werewolves asserting their lineage were all crowding in my mind. So what did I do? Yes. You guessed it, I went to see the movie again.

So thrice, I've seen this movie, and yet I feel it is not enough. Not enough.
In my most humble, biased and totally unwanted opinion, this movie was THE BEST IN THE ENTIRE SAGA. Possibly in the entire universe of movies ever made, as well as those not yet made. It was ridiculously good.

Let me tell you why.

EDWARD was gorgeous.
No really. He was perfect. Yes, I know he was perfect in Twilight. But ummm. . .in New Moon there were some issues. I know he's pale and his skin sparkles in the sun, but please. . . .lose the powder brush and 10 inch sized glitter. It was just too much.

BELLA was beautiful and wretched looking.
Of course, she's beautiful. No shocker there. But in a few of the movies, she wore a wig from hell, and whoever was in charge of hair follicularness should have just been down right embarrassed.

But from my perspective, in Breaking Dawn we really got to see her innocence, her strength and her beauty without a veil of big brown locks in the way. But then. . .without spoiling anything for those of you who didn't read the books, Bella gets dog sick. And when I say dog, I mean it looks like she ate one. And she looks terrible, like death on a stick. But Edward still loves her (sweet, sweet, sweet blood sucking Edward), and looks at her longingly, like she is the most beautiful woman in the world, despite the fact that her breath probably stinks because when people look that way, generally there breath doesn't smell good, but he just moves on in and snuggles anyway. Gotta love that guy.

The Cullens are Strong and Beautiful Bunch
These jokers are the kind you want to have around you when you being hunted by werewolves and are on your deathbed. I'm just saying. They are gorg, which makes them nice to look at after you've just had your face in a toilet bowl throwing up. Not to mention they have lots of money and can pick up whole Sequoia Trees and move them around while carving them into benches so that your wedding guests have a place to sit. This I think is very important if you going to have a demon baby in your stomach. You'd kind of like a nice wedding if your going to go through all that trouble.

Werewolves are beautiful Human Beings and Creatures alike
First, can I just give a big shout out and thank you to whoever was in charge of the Breaking Dawn Clothing Department. Hats of to you for allowing the werewolves to have shirts, shoes and socks. No really. You deserve a prize. For the love of Pete, thank you for realizing that it is not necessary to have them running around half naked in the dead of winter. And that even though we do realize this IS A MOVIE, in fact, it is not. It's real. And in real life, people will wonder why these beautiful men (and one woman) are running around in torn khaki's, and no shirts. Werewolves have pride too. It's about time we recognized that.

And so. . .I could tell you a lot more, like my speculations on why Jasper always looks constipated, and why Sam (the head werewolf) is such a douche, but I won't. I'll just let you go see the movie, because I don't want to spoil it for you. Just know this. Seeing this movie will make everything right in your world because it's about love. Real love. Between friends, enemies, and those somewhere in between.

Now go. Run like the wind. And fall in love with vampires.

Oh, but wait.
Dear children, wait.
There is one more bit of information you need to know. There is a little 4 minute vignette in the middle of the credits, at the very end of the movie. Don't get up and leave right away when the movie has ended, or you'll miss this lovely little teaser with the Volturi :)

Now go.
Run. Don't walk.

Ramblings on Breaking Dawn Part 1 and Butterscotch Bread Pudding for your Thanksgiving Dessert!

2011-11-14T06:04:00.000-06:00

[If you haven't already, enter my latest giveaway, it ends 11/20/11. It's for Chinese Food. Yum.]

As I type this it is exactly 2 days 17 hours and 07 minutes and 56 seconds before Breaking Dawn Part 1 comes out.

THIS IS A HUGE DEAL.

I read all of the books in the span of 2 weeks. There are 4, and they are huge, and I have 4 kids. That's a big deal.

I watched the first movie Twilight at home with my husband and I fell in love all over again, with him, cinema, and ummm. . .errrrrr. . . .Edward Cullen. Vampire Extraordinaire, for lack of a better term.

The second movie, New Moon, I watched with a group of my girlfriend's friends at a midnight showing. That was a little weird. But the movie was ON POINT, so it was totally worth it.

As to not make the same mistake I made with the second movie, I flew my husband and myself to California, to watch the third installment, Eclipse, with my bestie. She's the one who introduced me to this world, and she did not disappoint. We sat in line for 3 hours to get the best seats possible, we made our husbands come with us, and we watched a marathon of the first second and third movies. It was like 9 hours of pure nirvana. I get chills just thinking about it.

And now, the fourth movie is about to come out, Breaking Dawn Part One, and I have had my plans in place for approximately 1 year and 4 months, give or take a day. I'll be watching the movie at midnight with my best friend in a totally posh theater, with reserved seating *squeal*! Stadium seating in leather recliner over sized chairs. There will be pillows and blankets provided and a locker for my purse. Popcorn, yes. Cooked in Truffle oil. Have mercy. Silly contests on Wolf howls and door prizes and so much fun that I just peed in my pants thinking about it.

I'm so excited, I don't know what to do.
And all I ask is that the Woo family come with me on the grand adventure. That they come to the barbecue my bestie has planned. That the children bounce in the bounce house reserved just for them. That they eat, play, and make merry on this very joyous occasion. That Warwick talks and laughs and jokes with his old football buddy (my bestie's husband). That is all I ask. That is all I ask.

But they say, it's too much.
They say they have soccer banquets that weekend.
They say Southern Methodist University is playing football in Houston that day. And tailgating cannot be missed.
They say they have softball games, and tournaments, and skating parties with cake and ice cream, and THIS IS THE WORST WEEKEND EVER FOR ME TO PULL THEM AWAY FROM IT ALL.

"But I want you with me. It won't be the same with out you there. I won't enjoy the movie like I could. Please come. Please come." I beg.

But still, they cry. They complain. They roll their eyes in total defiance, and call me selfish and mean.

"FINE!!!!!" my heart cries out. "I WILL GO BY MY DAMN SELF!!!! And you all can stay here and do all the stuff you always do. . . to make your lives happy. NEVER MIND all the sacrifices I make every day of my life to make you people happy. I just wanted 1 WEEKEND. But no. YOU. CAN'T. DO. IT. Fine. "

And as I lay my sword down, and blood is gushing out of my neck, I'm ready to die a martyrs death. But in an instant, I remember the famous lines from the first movie, Twilight. . . . .

Edward: And so the lion fell in love with the lamb ...
Bella: Stupid lamb.
Edward: Sick, masochistic lion.

And I start to weep. It will be no martyrs death for me today. So I pick up my sword, and I yell, "STOP ALL YOUR MOANING AND COMPLAINING! I'M not going to be dissuaded. Edward fought for the love of Bella, and I am going to fight to see this movie! Gosh durnit. And all 5 of you are going to be sitting in a house nearby playing and having a good time while I do it. That includes the 2 year old!!!! And I don't want to hear any lip!

Call me selfish if you want. . . . But you better. . .call me A FICTIONAL VAMPIRE LOVER.
That is all."

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

It had to be done. I'm not much of a Martyr.
It seems lovely in theory, but yeah. . . .I think I'm a little too selfish to go out like that.

It is going to be so sweet.
To my mind. To my thoughts. To my world.
Just like this Bread Pudding is to my lips. Melting away all my worries. Making me forget about any trials or tribulations I may have.

You just take your spoon, and break into the slightly crunchy, sweet exterior, to find underneath pillows of butterscotch custardy goodness, sweetened with caramel and cream flavors. You take a bight, and your world is forever changed.

And you remember what it is to feel good. And to be happy. And to live life to the fullest. And you promise yourself not to forget.

Whole Wheat Butterscotch Bread Pudding
This recipe is a combination of my Mama and Nigella Lawson. Who in some odd way remind me of one another. My mother used to make a creamy bread pudding with raisins hidden inside, and a rum sauce on top. I would eat the rum sauce straight out of the container. Shhhh. Don't tell.

Oh. And you may notice that this recipe has no butter, nor brown sugar, which typically are key components in a butterscotch concoction. But trust me. You'll never miss them.

Ingredients:

Stale Whole Wheat French Loaf (about 10 oz.), torn into small bite size pieces*
2 cups sugar
1/4 cup water
1 cup heavy whipping cream
1 cup milk (I used 2%)
4 TB Brandy (I used Courvoisier, but I would have happily substituted rum or whiskey)
4 eggs, beaten (I've even made this with Egg Beaters. It still comes out very nice)

*This measurement is not exact. I apologize. But really it doesn't matter. Just fill up your 2 quart baking dish with bread until you come to an inch from the top, and that will be perfect. Also, no whole wheat bread? Any of your favorites will do. Nigella makes a pudding with croissants. Yum.

Directions:

1. Spray the bottom and sides of a 2 quart casserole dish with cooking spray. Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

2. Place torn bread into your baking dish, you should have enough to fill the container up to an inch from the top rim.

3. In a saucepan, combine sugar and water. Whisk to dissolve. Turn the heat on to medium heat and continue to whisk the sugar mixture as it bubbles. You want a light brown/amber color that will take about 3 minutes to obtain once the boiling starts.

4. Turn the heat down, and slowly add the cream, milk, and brandy. The pot will start to splay and sputter, but don't worry. Just continue to whisk, and any solids that form will melt over the low heat. Once the solids have melted, remove from the heat, and slowly add the beaten eggs so that they are not cooked. Pour the entire creamy mixture over the stale bread. Let sit for 5 minutes to absorb the liquid.

5. Bake for 30 minutes or until light brown on top and the center is set.

My Crazy Weekend and Crazy Cuisine Potstickers, Teriyaki Chicken and Orange Chicken Giveaway!!!

2011-11-13T07:13:00.001-06:00

On Friday we cleaned out the guest bedroom, making way for Christmas cheer and holiday guest (Nana) and cleaned up the house a bit.

Saturday, we watched True Blood in bed until 9 am, watched two soccer games, and then pulled out the Christmas lights and started hanging. Don't worry, we won't turn them on until Thanksgiving weekend. We ate Chinese (from the freezer). And my kids loved me for it. Then after they went to bed, I made a Butterscotch Bread Pudding (coming soon) poured myself and Warwick a glass of dry red wine mixed with Sprite (it was really good), and then we watched more True Blood, followed by Saturday Night Live. Ha. Ricky Perry. Silly, horrible Governor Rick Perry.

Sunday, we went to church, and took Lucky for his 4 month shots, at 5 months of age. Watched two softball games and brought snacks to a group of very cute 7 year olds. I read Ramona and Her Father to my kiddos. And helped my 5th Grader with her school portfolio. I think it was more for me than it was for them.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Weekends are generally pretty busy for us. So I don't cook, because I don't have time. Often we order pizza, pick up subs, or go by the McDonald's with $1.99 Happy Meals. Soledad ALWAYS requests Chinese. But the shop by our house has weird hours, and they aren't open on Sundays.

So this weekend we had. . . .

And Soledad loved me to pieces. Of course, she was famished because she forgot to eat lunch (how is that even possible) and when I came in from putting up the lights she was on her death bed.

"I promise dinner will be ready in 20 minutes tops." And I set off to the freezer and turned on the rice cooker.

Pulled out these boxes, read the directions on the boxes, microwaved, and skillet cooked and did what I needed to do. I pulled out some veg, chopped it up while the food was warming, and set it all up, and what do you know, a fantastic Chinese meal in 25 minutes (could have been even less if I hadn't chopped up a salad) and I even ended up with a clean kitchen in the same amount of time.

What I like :
It's like Chinese Take Out in your freezer. My freezer. Our freezer? Anyway, they are super fast, and taste really great. My favorite are the Potstickers. Delicious and only took 6 minutes to make. Warwick really liked the Teriyaki Chicken, and they extra sauce that he could drizzle over his rice. The kids, devoured the Orange Chicken, which was quite nice. Sweet, with plenty of sauce, yet the chicken was a bit crunchy. Nice texture and flavor.

So now, after last night dinner, my children all agree that I'm pretty awesome at microwaving and throwing already cooked delicious food into the oven and skillet.
And you can be to.

BECAUSE. . . . . .A Gift of Frozen Meals including Crazy Cuisine Potstickers, Chicken Teriyaki and Orange Chicken is up for grabs. Which is a WHOLE LOT OF FOOD. One that fed the hungry beasts at my house for two whole days. And those jokers eat A LOT.
TO ENTER:
Just answer the following question in the comments section of this post.

What did you do this weekend?

THE RULES

One entry per person, please. Or the Weekend Police will come to your house and make you do all sorts of horribly wretched boring mundane things on your next Saturday.

The The Crazy Cuisine GIVEAWAY will end Sunday, November 20, 2011 at midnight CST. Winners will be announced on Monday, November 21, 2011. Entrants limited to US and Canada. They will be chosen randomly using http://www.random.org/

Good Luck!

Disclaimer: This is a review/giveaway that I was NOT paid for. All the opinions are my own, and the only payment I received was the gift of being able to pass along a small token of my affection to you. Because why? You know this answer. I love you.