Take a look around you. How many people are on their mobile phones talking, walking, reading, surfing, emailing, or texting? How many people are multitasking on their phones as they walk down the street, across the street, or driving. (Read, “The Multitasking Myth: Are You a Culprit?”)

Now look again: how many people are engaged with their phones when they’re in person with another person?

What happened to actually paying attention to the person in front of you—the person with whom you (hopefully) arranged time?

The Brunch Conundrum

On any given weekend morning, observe people having brunch at a restaurant. I used to be amazed at how people could share a meal, enjoy their first cup of coffee, and read the newspaper—all without saying a word to each other. Why bother going out? (Some people say it’s a sign of an established relationship, when you don’t have to speak to be together. I don’t buy it.)

Now it’s even worse (yes, this is how I see it, worse). These people no longer bring a newspaper to brunch; their newspapers have been replaced by smart phones and Siri. I recently observed this behavior first-hand when my husband and I went out for a weekend brunch. For at least 15 minutes, the couple next to us never exchanged a word. They were engaged with their phones—the outside world—and not with each other.

Rediscover the Art of Conversation

Connecting with our community is important (evident by Facebook’s popularity). But what’s wrong with the picture when a table of two (or four, or more) is busy updating their Facebook status about where they are, what they’re doing, and taking a picture of same instead of actually being where they are?

What has happened to the art of conversation? I challenge you to put down your phone during a meal or a meeting. Be with the person you’re with.

Find a Topic of Conversation

How about sharing our experiences, insights, observations, points of view, funny stories, or books we’re reading? Maybe you’ll look at people walking into the restaurant and play a game together: guess where they’re from, how they’re related, where they’ve just been, how old they are? (Admission: my husband and I play this game, and have a lot of fun with it.)

You can’t laugh or converse with a phone. OK, yes, Siri will talk to you (and provide some entertaining non sequitur answers), but what about your real, live table partner?

Engage in the Present

We’ve forgotten the sound, the touch, and the power of conversation—one on one. Relationships still rule, so don’t let yours fall apart because of that little device in your hand. Put it away. (In fact, the more you engage in person, the greater the trust you develop—in both your personal and professional lives. Read, “Trust: Get It Right the First Time”.)

Some Things Are Just Better In Person

Do you remember the Southwest Airlines’ “Some Things Are Just Better In Person” campaign (2001)? The commercial series focused on things that were better in person. Among the “better in person” messages:

• You Can’t Fax a Handshake
• You Can’t Pat a Voicemail on the Back
• You Can’t Tickle a Voicemail
• You Can’t Fax a Pillow Fight
• You Can’t Slow Dance Online
• You Can’t Have Coffee With a Website
• You Can’t Smell Homemade Bread on Your Pager (It’s extinct…)
• You Can’t Email a Kiss

Southwest Airlines isn’t perfect (no airline is). But the company regularly raises the bar from the bare minimum to a higher, more personal level. (Read, “Get Personal – Southwest”.)

My point is this: get personal. Put down the phone and be with the person you’re with.

Reach Out & Comment

Either in person, or over the phone—personal connection matters. When was the last time you noticed a shift in success because you used a more direct method of communication (in-person always wins). Comment here, personally.

Email thread after email thread…and nothing gets settled. One Friday afternoon I decided to take action, pick up the phone, and call three people. All three had been emailing back and forth with me, and still there were loose ends.

I reached all three. Many people don’t use the phone as their primary business-communication tool. My calls went right through to my contacts. (Yes, sales success can be sealed with a real, live conversation. Read, “Pick Up the Phone and Guarantee Your Sales Future”.) Here’s how it went:

1. The first was a client. We wrestled with an outstanding issue, and we had never spoken on the phone or met in person. Within five minutes, the situation was resolved, and we had an understanding about how to work together in the future. She told me she was glad I called.
2. The second was to my publisher about my rights on a certain issue. It seems I opened a can of worms with my emailed question. I was amazed that a large publisher didn’t have a policy. They had to go back and forth with legal, and my contact explained why I received the answer I did. She told me she was glad I called and that we got everything resolved so quickly.
3. The third was to a new editor at a publication to which I contribute articles. In a short period of time, we agreed on the best content for me to contribute, and the deadlines. She told me she was glad I called.

Pick Up the Phone, Pick Up Your Pipeline

There’s a direct correlation between your personal connection and your sales success. Email is terrific for setting appointments and exchanging information. But when the situation becomes complex and the going gets tough, pick up the darned phone. You’ll be glad you called…and so will your contact.

Make a Difference

Pick up the phone and connect. What rewards are you reaping?

If you’ve dated in the age of the Internet, it probably went something like this: Before you went out on a date, you emailed back and forth, exchanged photos online, learned about each other’s interests, and then decided to talk on the phone. Did your relationship get serious without an in-person meeting? Probably not.

(Watch my video Top Tip “How to Ask For a Referral”.)

Cut to the Chase

Think about it. When you receive an introduction to your sales prospect, that person knows about you and why it’s beneficial for the two of you to talk. You begin the conversation “knowing about” each other. You skip over the uncomfortable questions that a sales prospect asks (or is thinking) in most initial sales meetings:

• What is this person trying to sell me?
• Why does he talk about himself?
• Please don’t let him ask me what keeps me awake at night?
• He’s asking questions—when he could have found the answers on the Internet.
• He’s pitching his product.
• How fast can I get this guy out of here?

Get Personal, Get In Person

The scenario is positively different when you’ve been introduced. You begin a friendly conversation talking about how you both know the Referral Source. One of the earliest lessons for me on the power of referrals, was after a short phone conversation, the referred prospect (Jim) and I had at a breakfast meeting.

Within the first 10 minutes of our breakfast, Jim shared information that weren’t trade secrets, but certainly wasn’t information that was available in any printed form. He told me he was sharing this information because we were already friends.

Enough said. Get the introduction and skip the awkward first date.

Join the Conversation

What was your first in-person business-referral meeting like? How did the personal referral make a difference in the conversation? (I bet the difference is huge.) Comment here, share your experience, and continue the conversation.

In keeping with my theme of “Get Personal,” I’m sharing with you a blog by email marketing and copywriting guru, Ivan Levison. Ivan is king when it comes to content.

Change your message from one that’s all about you, what you want, and what you offer. Shift the focus to your recipient—your prospect or client—and gain more attention and more business in less time.

Insight and Advice From Ivan Levison

“In advertising jargon, “manufacturer’s copy” refers to the kind of self-referential copy that clients write for themselves.

It’s all about “I,” “us,” “we,” “our,” and only incidentally about solving the prospect’s problem.

Let me give you an example of manufacturer’s copy that recently arrived in my inbox. It was an all-text lead-generation email. (Name and company name changed.)

Hello Ivan, 

My name is Bill Smith and I’m hoping to reach your online marketing representative. I work for LinkFarm and we are an online advertising network with a Managed Services consultancy specializing in link building. I would appreciate an opportunity to discuss our service offerings with you and see if there could be a match. I can be reached by telephone or email (both listed below) or I can call you to discuss at your earliest convenience. Please let me know what works best for you and I thank you in advance for your time. 

Sincerely, Bill Smith

What Bill is missing, I believe, is the fact that nobody really cares about what he’s hoping for or who he would like to reach. Instead of focusing on his needs, Bill should immediately address the prospect’s problem and explain how it can be solved.

Ok. Let’s take a crack at a fast rewrite of the lead and see how we can make something of Bill’s lead-generation email . . .

Hi Ivan:

Want to attract thousands of new visitors to your Web site?  

 It’s easier than you think!

 The secret is to get other Web sites to provide links to yours.

 How do you do that?

 You’ll find answers in LinkFarm’s brand new report titled . . .

                     “101 Ways to Build Web Traffic 

                                  With Link-Building!”

                                  CLICK HERE

              to get your FREE copy with no obligation!

From there, I’d give the reader some examples of the priceless information they’ll find in the downloadable report. Then I’d tell them briefly that their free report comes from LinkFarm and I’d describe the company’s services in just a sentence or two.

The key point is that I would use a free item to get the prospect to “CLICK HERE,” then collect their contact information on a landing page. I would not expect people to call me or email me when I am offering them absolutely nothing!

The take-away message this month? Don’t write manufacturer’s copy that’s all about you and that you want. Think first about what the prospect wants and watch sales take off!”

About Ivan Levison

Ivan Levison is a professional freelance copywriter who builds profits for forward-looking companies. Direct Mail, Email & Advertising Copywriting | http://www.levison.com/

What Matters to You? Comment Here.

How do your vendors speak so you’ll listen? What catches and retains your attention? How to you communicate to your prospects and clients that they matter?

Comment and join the conversation.

“I don’t care about you. I only care about what you can do for me, my team, and my organization.” That’s what our prospects and clients think, but it’s probably not what they say (at least not to your face).

Our clients don’t care about “us.” They care about what we deliver. Top salespeople deliver true business ROI. Do you?

The Standard Sales Response

Then why, when salespeople tell me about their companies and what they do, and why I should work with them, do they respond with these answers?

• We are experienced
• We are professional
• We have been in business for 25 years
• We have long support hours
• We are local to you
• We have multiple industry awards
• We understand your business issues
• We do everything we can to help you succeed
• We provide solutions that help your company grow and prosper
• We do business with integrity and commitment
• We volunteer in the community
• We take out the guesswork and leave you more time to run your business
• We take the time to listen to your goals
• We are your one-stop shop

Yes, these are all real-life examples. These are exact quotes from my clients before we worked together to build a referral-sales organization. You’ll notice the common word throughout: “We.”

Drop the “We” Perspective

Personal pronouns are about us, not about our client. Clients don’t need to know more about us, our experience, our expertise, or what we think. Clients want measurable, positive changes to their business. Clients want results.

Change the way you talk about what your company offers—whether it’s products or services.

Shift Your Perspective, Shift Your Sales

Differentiate yourself from your competition. Frame your answer to the question, “Why should I work with you?” from the customer’s perspective.

• What business results do you deliver?
• What’s the impact of your solution?

Here’s your litmus test: If you can say “so what” after your statement, you haven’t described a business result.

Your Action Step: Get Beyond “So What?”

Work with a colleague and keep saying, “so what” until you can’t say “so what” anymore. That’s when you’ll have the answer that your sales prospects and clients really want to hear. This is hard work, but if you leave it to your sales prospects to figure out what they’ll get from your solution, you’ve already lost the deal to your competition.

Learn how to position, set, and deliver your sales value. Read, “How to Seal the Deal with Real-Life Results”.

It’s not about you. Do the hard work and nail the sale.

What’s Your Biggest “So What?” Challenge?

Post your hurdles, insight, and comments here. Collectively, we contribute, learn, and grow as sales professionals. Comment here.

I love Southwest Airlines. I actually believe that this big airline cares about me. I recently had a birthday (no tears, I’m glad about it!).

Life is high touch. Southwest understands this. (I appreciate a hand-written card. I believe in the thank you note. I believe “The Fortune Is in the Follow-Up”.

Every year I receive a birthday card from Southwest Airlines. It includes a note of appreciation and signatures from a whole bunch of people. OK, I know these aren’t actual signatures, they’re copies, but it’s so personal feeling. I love the photo on the front of the card—big Happy Birthday letters and balloons—placed just as the tide is coming in at the beach.  

The Personal Touch Makes a Difference

I don’t know if Southwest knows that I love the beach, but the card is happy—the company remembered and thanked me for being part of the Rapid Rewards® family. We can all get more personal.

How Do You Stay Connected?

How are you including your clients, prospects, and colleagues in your family? How are you staying connected? (Remember, saying thank you is a key part of staying connected.)

LinkedIn is a terrific sales tool. We learn about a prospect’s current business, where they used to work, where they went to school, their interests, travels, and how we’re connected.

Leverage Your Business Development

LinkedIn is one way to connect, and selling is about connections. Here are three LinkedIn sales tips to leverage your connections and your time on social media. These are not negotiable. Show up as the sales professional you are.

(For more on why relationships still rule, read, “Toss the Technology”.)

Here’s how to use LinkedIn:

1. Include your photo: I want to see who you are. People do business with people. Make sure you have a business-ready photo, and not one on the beach with a margarita in your hand.

2. Personalize your invitation: Your goal is to connect—person-to-person. Let me know why you want to connect. One or two sentences will do. It just takes a few seconds. Do not use:

• Since you are a person I trust, I wanted to invite you to join my network on LinkedIn (You don’t know me, so why would you trust me. Better yet, why would I trust you?)
• I’d like to add you to my professional network on LinkedIn. (Sure you would, but why?)
• “So and so” has indicated you’re a friend (I don’t know you. I’m not your friend.)

3. Always reply with a personal message when you accept an invitation. Tell them why your think the connection is valuable, offer them an article or tool from your website, or offer to help with your expertise. (Yes, I know that means “free,” but sharing your knowledge helps others and truly demonstrates that you value the connection.)

I invite you to connect with me on LinkedIn if you think our connection would be valuable to both of us. It would be great to get to know you.

What’s Your Sales Connection?

Tell me about your small-world story, personal referral, or sales connection story. When you use referrals as your business-development strategy, you’ll have so many great stories to tell, you won’t know where to start!

It’s tempting, in a yo-yo economic climate to slash costs and investment across the board. Don’t. Get selective. Get lean. Discretionary spending is negotiable.

What’s not negotiable are brand building, innovation, and product development. That’s what Ram Charan wrote in Fortune on February 12, 2008, “Managing Your Business in a Downturn”. 

He said “Keep building. When the top line looks shaky and the bottom line worse, the temptation is to go after discretionary spending. Fine – but do not consider product development, innovation, and brand building optional. Sacrificing your future for a slightly more comfortable present is not worth it. If you keep building, you can come back strong.”

Invest In Innovation

It’s four years later and what’s changed? Not that much, really. The economy is still suspect. The stock market has its ups and downs, the situation in Greece keeps rearing its head, and Iran threatens nuclear power.

However, innovation appears to be the “new word” for 2012. I recently returned from an amazing trip to Chile and Easter Island. People are finally discovering this remarkable sliver of a country.

Invest In Entrepreneurial Thinking

Entrepreneurs thrive there:

• A company that provides wine tours has been in business one year. They’re searching for a space to expand their business and provide a Chilean cooking experience as well as pairing wines with food.
• A Santiago tour driver launches a business with his brother to offer tours throughout the country and into the Mendoza wine region of Argentina (just over the Andes).
• A young, energetic Chilean woman who recently returned from working with California wineries, is forming partnerships with VCs and angel investors who want to invest in wineries in Chile.

I picked up a copy of I Love Chile News when I was in Chile. They had a special feature on Innovators of 2012 (alas, not available online). The issue featured education Innovation: innovation and indigenous peoples; agricultural innovation; the game inventor of Phrazzle Me; women entrepreneurs; and a New York street-seller who has 20 vendors in New York, 300 in Chile, and 10 in Spain… and more.

How Are You Innovating?

What changes have you made to survive and thrive? How are you innovating—in connection, product, process, and delivery? Comment here and share your innovation.