Nab's

Nuffnang madness

2017-01-02T08:54:00.000-08:00

Hello 2017,

I hope you all are having a good start this year. I see a lot of posts on facebook and instagram on what are the new resolutions whats not. I unfortunately, going off with not-so good start on the first day itself and looking at that, my second day of 2017 is about the same situation.

But anyway, if any of you experiencing any bad new year, hey you are not alone. I understand, when you feel like throwing you phone if you see one more picture/post on social media - oh new year off with a good start,oh 2k17 here i come.

Bloody annoying.

But hey, positive vibes only! Lets go through 2017 hoping for things to get better.

Anyone having problem to add their nuffnang html? Please help.

Funny guy lah you.

2016-12-13T06:35:00.000-08:00

I have a friend who told me once, that I am funny, full of expression and I will succeed if I make my own you tube channel. lel

Anyway, laughing comes easily to me especially around my family. Growing up my dad always make this funny voices, characters and jokes and we all will laugh, especially my mum (she laugh the hardest & loudest) and my brother will dramatically rolling on the floor laughing (taking the rofl term seriously) . Oh my uncles , they are adorable and thats it. Only them, the rest of the world, they are not funny. I secretly judge them other people when they attempt to make jokes. They are very few of my friends that can make me laugh but meh, few occasions maybe.

I can name only few tv comedies that I like watching, friends (duh), how i met your mother , big bang theory and new girls. thats all.

malay comedies? heh lawak hambar. if you used repetitively 'bodoh' 'bangang' 'mak kau mak aku' 'bapak kau bapak aku' 'hotak kau sana sini'...thats not comedy. but there is one good show during the 90's, 'jangan ketawa' or something, most of the characters are chinese and indians, very few malays. maybe thats why.

this is the 90's show.

So when i first met this guy back in 2013, him wearing this fierce look ( really tall, broad shoulder and deep dark eyes and thick eye brow) and dont give a fuck face and on top of that answering only few words when I asked anything, I have no idea it will be the same guy who can make me laugh in 10 seconds anytime anyday now.

He was shy at first but after few dates, haha, i dont have to bother to put on any blusher on my face because its covered with red all the time. No sir, I was not blushing but better, I was full of life. I laugh much that I, at one point experienced stomach cramp from laughing. I dont care if others dont find it funny, but i do. He's funny.

He can do it all the time with me, during class, during clinical bedside ( really this is so inappropriate i know), driving (if the road is clear), and skyping is my favourite.

Look at his face? Not funny kan.

Look at mine, red already.

After 30 minutes or so, im still not over it. I cant even remember why i laugh. Heh. Oh, maybe this?

Yep, dont you think this is funny?

I do. HAHAHAH.

Leaving 2016

2016-12-12T09:51:00.002-08:00

Oh no, its end of the year already !

Im leaving 2016 as medical graduates, still a girlfriend to someone, not a good friend, cleansed soul and tembam girl.

Medical graduates !

Oh hey, medical school checked ! I could never dreamt that I can finish medical student. For someone who never got top 5 since primary, never there for hari anugrah kecermelangan except if i joined the choir. Sometimes I doubt myself, most of the time..what I am really doing here? Its a stupid way to prove myself , really.

Along the way, as Allah intended, I found myself loving the situation. I will try, never stop trying InsyaAllah to be the best and learnt to serve better each day. I just hope my compassion and my patience will be forever.

7 years after highschool wey. I lost everything socially..( friends, outside world ) but I learnt a lot more.

Thanks a millions to my parents, families, few boyfriends along the way (HAHA) , sometimes friends.

Still a girlfriend!

I am somewhat dissapointed that I have no abilty to stay single..at all. But, meeting Z during 3rd year is something I never planned. It just happened. What I initially thought a rebound phase after breaking up with P turned to be going-to-be-3years-soon relationship that I cherish, The most honest relationship i have ever been with, no cheating nor backstabbing. Maybe because he treats me as his equals so I am free to go around running to whatever i want without worrying about jealousy and such.

I am lucky to be loved like this. Right now, we are trying to make long distance works which is doing quite well. Miss hanging out with him though.

Not so much a good friend.

I wanted to blame medical school for losing my friends but honestly, I just outgrew them. I became lazy to contact, to make effort to strengthen friendships with old friends and even the new ones. No, I dont blame the school. I blame people in my medical school. They say your medical school friends will be your friends for life. I for ones, eager to make new friends after medical school. I met the worst group of people who they called themselves as my friends. Betrayal after betrayal. gossips, backstabbing, jealousy where to begin? I struggle to restore my trust in people after knowing them. I mastered the highest level of hypocrisy around them. Gosh.

Thank god there are still Shakira, Farah who still havent given up. Still, they thinks that 'kampung kelam kabut girl' are there somewhere.

Cleansed Soul

Alhamdulillah, praised Allah who is the most forgiving, given me a chance to be his guest at the Holy Makkah. My trip there was unexpected, I was scared because I heard stories, the unpleasant one about how god punish is very cruel ways possible.

But , praise Allah 10000000000000000000x times for the chance to understand what is life and afterlife is all about.. to appreciate everything that happened or might happen. I am not good in words,I cant describe exactly what I felt when Holy Kaabah stood majestically infront of me. No, no words can explain how my knee went weak as I shed my tears embracing Allah and I am His humblest servant.

All this while, how ignorant human I am, not to appreciate our Prophet Muhammad SAW. When i went to Madinah, I went to visit this museum just infront of Masjid Nabawi. This museum is more like a art gallery full with charts of Prophet's family, his penghijrahan, his sacrifices..and few description from his friends themselves on his personality. maybe all this while, i read it in bahasa malaysia thats why i cannot understand it..takde feel. But, Masha Allah, in english, I can cry by just reading how his friends describe him. What a perfect human being, messenger to all human race but yet the humblest among all. I am ashamed for what his current human race becoming now, that includes me,

People do expect changes physically, since I dont comply to the physical appearance that I need to be in. Oh how my father is dissapointed with me, it sadden me but I hope he wont stop praying for me as I do too one day want to be physically complete. Do not despair, I am trying slowly. Forgive me for not trying harder, I am still after all , a weak servant to Him.

Coming back from my trip, I believe it changes the way I look around. I feel more at ease because I know I never alone. HE is always there for me, O Mighty Allah.

InsyaAllah Im bring my family again to my next trip. The best trip ever in my life.

Tembam Pipi!

HAHAHA, i gained 2kg after my umrah. This is the heaviest weight I have ever been in..damnn it. Looking back to old photos, I promised myself I should start clean eating & exercise. I never control my food intake for the last 25 years because I was skinning like a doll, so why bother eh?

Now Now Now, i have to control everything. Since this is InsyaAllah my free of stress periods i better start taking care of my health.

** Nabs***

The usual short cases in surgery

2016-04-25T22:27:00.001-07:00

I hate my handwriting, like really, hate my handwriting, even my boyfriend cant read mine sometimes. But actually its not that bad, but it is not neat.

So for surgery, I started to write my own notes by typing it . It that way, I can share to everyone, and people can spot my mistakes and puff I can just correct it right away without having it look messy.

So these are the common short cases examination. Let me know if there is any mistakes. Oh, most of these are from Prof Aung class, ( I love surgery because of him )

Enjoy

Abdominal Examination

Inspection

1. Abdomen moves with respiration

2. Shape is normal

3. Umbilicus is normal

4. There is no surgical scar

5. Upon coughing, both hernia orifices are intact

6. No visible cough impulse on surgical scar.

Palpation

Light palpation

· It is soft and non tender

· No palpable superficial mass

· Carnett’s test / head raising test – It is not prominent if it is retroperitoneal structure

Deep palpation

· No hepatosplenomegaly and organomegaly.

o Site.

o Edge.

o Moves with respiration.

o Surface is smooth/nodular.

o Margin is well defined/not.

o Splenic notch felt/not felt.

o Cannot insinuate

Percussion

· There is no shifting dullness & liver dullness is intact

· Normal resonance noted on percussion.

Auscultation

· Normal bowel sound is heard.

· Increase : bowel obstruction

· Decrease :paralytic ileus

· No bruit is heard- liver/renal

I would like to conclude by performing digital rectal examination to exclude pathology causing acute abdominal pain.

Examination of Thyroid Gland

Pre-requisites

Proper positioning

- Neck in the extended position

- Exposed until upper part of the neck

- Supraclavicular exposed

Procedure

Inspection

· Ask patient to swallow

o Swelling at the midline –R/L/Isthmus

o Move with swallowing – because of superior constrictor muscle & berry ligament that attached to hyoid bone

· Ask patient to potrude tongue –obliterans ligament?

Comment: Thryroid gland is enlarged in both right & left lobe. It moves with deglutition, lower border is felt so no retrosternal extension. Thyroid does not move with protrusion of tongue.

Palpation

· Surface is uniformly smooth, firm/ bossulated consistency

· Thrill at the superior thyroid

· Mid jugular, deep jugular and supraclavicular LN is not palpable

· Trachea is midline

Percussion

· Percussion of manubrium is resonant so no retrosternal extansion.

Auscultation

· At the lateral to cricoids

· No change of voice

CNS examination

· Knee reflex- sluggish on hypothyroidism at the infundibulum ligament.

· Pretibial myxedema (non pitting edema)

· Proximal myopathy – squat 2-3 times to see whether patient is easily fatigue or not

Other Sign

· Bamberton’s sign (big thyroid)

o ask patient to lift up their hands

o sign of facial flushing & congestion

· Lehey’s method(small thyroid)– push to one side, more prominent

· Kocher sign(big thyroid) – press bilateral causing dyspnea

Hand Sign

· Clubbing/Acromegaly

· Palmar erythema

· Moist & shaking

· Fine tremors (ask patient to close eyes)

· Pulse

o TC (direct to SA node, increase symphatetic, increase temp)

o Water hammer pulse + Ectopic heart beat – due to dilated cardiomyopathy

Complication : Atrial Fibrillation because irregularity causing ineffective blood flow -> ischemia -> throtoxic cardiac failure -> collapsing pulse

Eye Sign

1. Lid retraction

a. Because muller muscle is sensitive to sympathetic.

b. No exposure of sclera between eyelid & corneolimbus junction

2. Lid lag

a. Upper lid is lagging behind

b. The lid is covering the upper sclera

3. Exopthalmos

a. Tissue complex deposit with lymphocyte in retroorbital space

b. Eye stare

4. Chemosis suffused

5. Exposure keratitis

6. Opthalmoplegeia

7. Blindness (Malignant Exopthalmus)

Varicose Vein

Inspection

On examination of the lower limb, there is torturous and dilated vein of long saphenous system because it started at the gaiter area from medial site towards popliteal fossa to saphenous femoral junction.

Lateral : short saphenous vein

Otherwise, there is no eczematous skin, hyperpigmented skin, skin tickening, any flaring, venous ulcer or limb deformity.

Lipodermatosclerosis

There is hyperpigmented skin, thickening of the skin , edematous over the medial malleolus (gaiter’s area ) compared to the normal leg.

Venous Ulcer

There is a big/small ulcer at the gaiter’s area ascending from Achilles area.

Surrounding skin is erythematous & hyperpigmented.

Margin is irregular.

Edge is surrounded by slough at the punch out area.

The floor is covered by unhealthy granulation tissue and slough

Palpation

The hyperpigmented skin is thickened and harden compared to the normal leg.

I would like to proceed to Modified Tredelenburg test and Parthke test because:

1) There are obvious long saphenous varicosities on inspection because of incompetence valve.

2) It can be due to incompetence of perforated valve (p/s: if there’s continuous reflux)

3) It can be due to post phlebitis or previous DVT.

Modified Tredelenburg Test

Pre- requisites

1. The vein must be completely empty in lying position

2. Elastic tourniquet

First, patient must be lying down and emptied the vein.

Apply tourniquet at the upper thigh at the SPJ 4 cm lateral and below the pubic tubercle. Do not apply too hard because it will damage the vein.

Ask the patient to stand up (carry the patient to show empathy - 5% marks)

Interpretation (observe from in front of the leg)

There is filling up of vein from below towards the tourniquet, there is incompetence of perforated valve.

Release the tourniquet.

When there is rapid filling from above, there is SFJ valve incompetence.

I would like to continue to Parthke Test while patient is still standing.

Apply the tourniquet at the SFJ junction, asks the patient to walk for 10 minutes and ask whether the patient feels any pain at the calf muscle to exclude DVT.

If there is significant DVT, surgery to remove saphenous vein is contraindicated because it act as compensatory (only outlet) vein to flow. It is to prevent it to be ischemic and gangrenous.

I would like to confirm by Duplex Doppler Ultrasound.

Short Case Colostomy

· Lower Midline scar extending to the umbilical

· In LIF, there’s a plastic bag containing feces

· Insp after open bag
- There is an OUTPOUCHING MUCOSA which is PINK & MOIST
- Which I can see feces coming out from the opening
- My Diagnosis is Pelvic Colostomy

Ø Anus is absent because of surgical scar presence

Ø With this findings
1) Extensive lower midline scar
2) Pelvic Colostomy
3) There is no anus

Ø My comment is that Pelvic Colostomy is permanent colostomy which is part of APR (Abdominal Perineal Resection)

Ø After APR, anus is removed so that permanent colostomy is done.

Definition

ü Surgical procedure of making an opening in the colon & bringing out though the ant. Abd wall for the purpose of diverting feces temporarily or permanently

ü It can be done only in mobile portion (Sigmoid & Transverse Colon)

Classification

1) Site – Transverse Colostomy
- Sigmoid colostomy (Pelvic Colostomy)

2) Purpose of relieving the defunctioning pathology
i) Temporarily

Complication of colostomy

1) Prolapse of Colostomy – Due to coughing

2) Skin excoriation due to colostomy diarrhea
---> Proteolytic enzyme in active form

3) Psychological trauma – Depression
- consent and precounseling

4) Ischemia and gangrene
(Red ---> Black) ------> Mx: Immediate refreshen of colostomy

5) Infection of colostomy site
- redness, swollen & discharge around stoma ---> Mx: Well fitted bag around stoma

6) Parastomal Hernia

Management of Colostomy

1) DIET CONTROL
-No absorption since no short bowel
-Avoid spicy (Irritate Mucosa) and Non-digestable (Osmotic draw)
-Easy digested food
-Well cooked vege
-Moderate fibre

2)      Toilet training & drink a lot of water ---> Stimulate gastrocolic reflex
                                                                         Vagal to sacral reflex
                                                                         Colon will contract

*Stroking skin will stimulate gastrocolic reflex

3) Psychologic support

Indication

1) To relieve Intestinal Obstruction (Defunction or Diverting of feces)

2) To relieve distal infection – eg. Multiple anal fistula & Rectal impalement injury

3) A) Part of colorectal Operation
i) APR
ii) Hartmann
iii) Temporary defunctioning colostomosis to secure anastomosis

B) Benign d/s i) Hirschsprung disease
: Temporary defunctioning

C) High imperforated anus : Anal Athesia

Lipoma(unique tumor)

Benign tumor of true adult fat cell (adipose tissue)

Characteristics feature

· Slow growing

· With capsulated – well defined margin

· Painless

· Soft to firm

Classification of lipoma

· Subcutaneous lipoma

· Intramuscular lipoma – at the medial thingh (don’t confure with liposarcoma)

· Submucosa lipoma – can cause intessuseption

· Intraarticular / synovial (at joint)

· Retroperitoneal lipoma

· Intracranial lipoma – cause fits

Pathology

· lipoma

· Fibrolipoma- firm

· Neurolipoma

· Hemangiolipoma – bleeding

· Multiple lipomatosis with pain

Physical examination

· Skin is pinchable

· Not attach tounderlying skin

· Soft consistency

· Slipagge sign positive

· Transilluminate negative

· Regional LN not palpable

· Lobulation sign is positive ( finger like projection)

Diagnosis: subcutaneous lipoma

Management: excision with nucleation with biopsy

Sebaceous cyst (Epitheloid tumor)

It is a true cyst/ retention cyst

Accumulation of sebum because obstructive of sebaceous duct

Clinical features

· Everywhere except for the palm & sole

· Common in hairy area ( scalp & scrotum)

· Gradual onset

· Pinch test is negative because Arise from epidermis

· Punctum is in 95%

· Fluctuation test is positive

· Transillumuniate negative because is not a clear fluid

· Regional LN is not palpable

Treatment: Excision of cyst together with cyst wall and biopsy

Complication

· Infected -> red & tender with palpable LN and fouls smelling -> give antibiotics

· Calcification of the wall

· Perculior tumor in the head

· Abscess

· Gardner’s syndrome – multiple sebaceous cyst with colonic pathology

Breast examination

On inspection of both breasts, it is symmetrical/asymmetrical (confirm with nipple line)
There is no/yes visible swelling. Skin changes are seen (peau de orange).

Ask patient to raise up their hand to see any skin fixation.

Palpation

· Size

· Shape

· Swelling -pain/painless, mobile/non mobile, tender/non tender

o Outer quadrant – notorious to breast cancer

· Location

· Areolar

o If there is swelling at the sub-areolar, BCS is contraindicated

· Nipple d/c

Ask patient to put their hand at their hip to see muscle attachment (before and after contraction)
If attached to muscle [Pectoralis major], indicates Stage 3 breast ca

Axillary LN (stage 2)

o Pectoral LN

o Apical LN (2^nd rib)

o Central LN( 2^nd rib)

o Lateral (medial to humerus bone) – rare

o Subscapularis LN

o Supraclavicular

Conclude examination by abdominal exam & pelcic examination to exclude Krukemberg tumor

Hernia short case

Examine the patient inguinal region

Exposure is from above umbilicus to mid-thigh

On inspection

(If there is swelling visible upon lying down, no need stand up)

There is swelling at the right inguinal region.

Upon coughing, there is visible cough impulse.

External genitilia is normal. No both scrotal swelling

Palpation

Pre requisite: Reducible by relaxing the abdomen and inguinal canal by flexing the hip.

On palpation, there is a palpable cough impulse on coughing.

· Describe the swelling

· Consistency

· Tender

· Hemispharic shape

· Size

· Location

o Medial tu pubic tubercle – Fonnicular

o Lateral to pubic tubercle – Bubonocele

Because there is a visible and palpable cough impulse, this is a hernia.

I would like to differentiate direct and indirect by doing deep ring occlusion test.

Locate the deep ring- midpoint between ASIS & pubic symphysis (2.5cm above)

· Tell the patient to reduce the hernia

· Occlude the deep ring with 3 fingers

· Ask the patient to cough 3 times

If there is a swelling upon occlusion then it is deep occlusion (-) which is direct hernia

If there is no swelling upon coughing then deep occlusion test (+). It is indirect hernia --> To confirm, release occluding finger, tell pt to cough, hernia will come out.

I would like to finish my examine the external genitilia and do PR examination.

My med mad life

2016-04-25T22:17:00.000-07:00

My pro exam is 150 days away and i am scared like shit scared.
After 5 years in medical school, the end of it will come soon.

But yet, i feel dumber than ever.

Hopefully everything is going well.

Desperate Act

2013-12-14T03:29:00.001-08:00

I might still have the anger within me but I guess I couldn't really express my anger that much. But one thing I am aware of is, i am at the stage where you call BARGAINING.

BARGAIN for something else but it is so obvious that all i want is you. Making myself busy secretly so that you miss me, you know, something like that.

Maybe I was wrong.

Bargain to repeat the same history so that maybe just you know, maybe you will realise this, and you will come back.

A very strong and desperately to have the thing I always have( or had), a relationship although the universe against it. Desperately to have someone back in my life although it meant having a wrong guy, again

BUT maybe, just maybe you see me, and sigh what the hell im doing?

:: Secretly, i just want it to stay like this, like you know i like you and stuff, but you are mine alone.

Rhytm of My Heart

2013-12-04T06:52:00.001-08:00

“Once you had put the pieces back together, even though you may look intact, you were never quite the same as you'd been before the fall.”
― Jodi Picoult

That is what Jodi Picoult says about heartbreak. I read a lot of them, experiencing it is never they say in the book or movies. Its more than that, no not even close like they say in the novel about knife slicing every skin of their body. It is more like having a heart in your hand and there, there, someone will take it and squeeze it till it burst, and the remaining will be there, piercing every angle of the heart till you feel numb, till you cannot feel anything. But you can hear, the sound of your heart.

LUB-DUB LUB-DUB LUB-DUB.

That is the sound of every human being who breathe air in the world right now.No matter heartless you call them, their heart beats exactly like yours.

LUB-DUB LUB-DUB LUB-DUB

Exactly like mine, you can even feel it beating against your skin if you touch it, you know its there literally, you know the shape of it if you trace it, but the truth is, I cannot feel it, there is hollow but what I don't understand is why the hollow seems to be heavier that all this while?

They say about 5 stages of grief, 1st being in denial, 2nd is anger, 3rd being bargaining, 4th depression and the last one is acceptance.

Long way to go for acceptance I see.

:: Its going to be alright, I must. They must be.

Yo Ramly.

2013-11-01T08:42:00.000-07:00

Now this is a sin,

eating burger in the middle of the night.
The best one in Malaysia.

Special Beef Burger (Burger+ Egg) around Taman Samudera, Manjung, Perak is to DIE for.

Seems easier, doesn't it?

2013-10-02T09:07:00.003-07:00

I wish I could be selfish too, it seems easier and I will be HAPPY,definitely .

Really hating my gut now,
To feel about others, SUCKS!

EH?

When you hear it, shh.

2013-09-24T22:14:00.000-07:00

Fellow readers,

Today marked my 6th day stuck in my own happy world at a place called home.
Living in sub rural areas where news travel fast whether you are a big celebrities, or not.

Just by sitting at home, my mom would come back every night re-tailing me the stories or well gossip she heard or in her context , received. My mom is not much of a gossip person, unlike me, HA HA , she received all the 'information' from her patient at work.

So , well most of the gossip that "appropriate" (sometimes I wonder how old she think I am) for her to share the juicy gossip. Mostly, it just revolved my circle of friends, or just circle of people who happen to be my age whom sometimes I never met off.

News travel he/ she went to UK, Aus, German to further their studies, you know stuff like that make you wonder you are getting old.

NOT. Not I didn't think of it, but it just nice that people progressing, and I am myself proud that I am going to clinical years soon, InsyaAllah :) ( This require me to go straight studying 12 hours without clicking any media website, cheerios mate)

And, Im proud of them too. To those who live their dreams, some of us matured very late like me, duh , I actually start taking things seriously after I finish my high school. So i am very proud of us. *smug face*

Wanna-bes? Maybe?

Some of us, don't. They are getting worst and end up in car racing for example, ILLEGAL car racing, if they are good, its a another matter. They will look cool, have a nice hair, I might be their hippies if they are good, but they don't, they are bad, really really bad. Especially this guy who happen to share childhood with me. Things don't just stop there, he O-M-G happen to be living nearby, and hence he is in in my circle of friends .So sad to see, that he just wasting their life going down to the drain. Not that I excel in every single thing in my life, but hey, I am trying man.

So please, I begging you, quit whatever nonsense things that you do, be a man, then you are welcome back in our circle.

I cannot believe my sister used to date that guy, who happen to try dating me at the same time.

Typical douche-bag. LAMO.

Pray Harder

2013-09-22T18:30:00.000-07:00

That's All. :)

Chilling will be the main priority.

2013-09-21T00:09:00.000-07:00

Can be fixed still, chill.

Find something exciting to do, chill.

Stop worrying, chill

Stop crying for the love of god, CHILL.

Go study okay, *POSITIVE* :)

How a day could mean a world to you?

2013-09-14T02:26:00.003-07:00

Hey yeah its me again, I guess I might be spamming the blog frequently now since I actually have a typing box in my BlogSpot.

I am still in my study break week, another 3 days to exam but I am feeling NOTHING. serious shit NOTHING. I am scared, with my continues assessment with just a B- which means it will take some serious shit to write in exam hall on Tuesday next week in order to maintain my 2nd year medical life that is unfortunately getting worst.

IM SHIT SCARED, but UNFORTUNATELY, my unnecessary thought overcome the medical knowledge that I tired to memorize for the whole 3 months, making my life harder than it looks.

Topic for today,

BIRTHDAY!

Everyone seems to talk about birthday today, its kind of annoying.

I have been dumped on my birthday, fought with my birthday, had the best surprise birthday party, had ackward surprise and exam on my birthday (like almost every year) but never ever, I had to celebrate with a person, that maybe will be the last birthday celebration ever.

We started with my birthday and to end up with my birthday too, its too execrating painful to go through.

I just cant.

Throwback my pizza birthday's surprise !

Video of the week

2013-09-13T09:45:00.001-07:00

I swear that I have no idea what is wrong with my blogspot, thank god internet explorer still works.Lol.so do not under estimate the power of internet explorer.

sometimes, it is better to settle for old stuff.

I guess its neurology exam where all my neuron in brain is hirewire, I watched all weird vids on you tube this week to take my mind off from all these medical terms.
(Internet explorer doesn't allow me to link from you tube, oh what the hell)

1. Wrecking balls-by Miley Cyrus
A word: Miley, as medical student I could list down at least 10 bacteria that could infect you by being naked on that ball and licking the hammer.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=My2FRPA3Gf8

2. The Ylvis- The Fox
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jofNR_WkoCE

Its not going to be the next Gangnam, but I am sure of hell, we will see a lot of parody coming from this video. Really stupid, but what the hell, its one of a hell catchy phrase- ding-ding-dong (something like that)

Happy belated 13th Friday everyone!

Kopi Lemak Nasi Ooo

2013-09-02T08:08:00.000-07:00

Still figuring it out,why I am having problem with my blogspot. Sigh.

Throwback last week's SEGi Amazing Race 2013.It was hell of fun. The furious five ( ME ME ME group) won the 2nd plan. We should have been been first if I actually run , or DO stuff. LOL. Seriously, its like i was crawling when everybody else was running.

After 3 hours of running, swearing and all the sweat and well swearing most of it, it was worth it when a random girl announce we were the 2nd team to arrive :)

The FURIOUS FIVE!

ouh and our catchy phrase was : Kopi Lemak Nasi Ooo. Did you get it? Its the terbalik. Okay, im tring to be funny here, i believe it came out L.A.M.O

Doa,Terawih and Ramadhan

2013-07-26T07:55:00.001-07:00

When I begged for mercy.
I begged to ease my pain and my life.
I cried, knelled upon Allah to save me, letting me to keep all the things that mattered to me,to let it be at my side forever,please please please

my parents, my family, my friends, my studies,my life and you.

I beg to keep you.

Fun weekend at the Carl's

2013-07-15T03:08:00.001-07:00

As if it never happen.

Its not wrong to smile and live in a dream once in while :)

It is happening tomorrow!

2013-07-04T06:28:00.002-07:00

Breaking Glass

2013-06-03T22:23:00.003-07:00

This is the time when the sadness is real, realized fully there wont be any light of hope.

No more hope to convince myself.

He is the glass that reflected my own-self. My own reflection that I carry everywhere.It is part of my life. A big part of life.

Now all these are just glasses that cannot be used to pour water. the water that I hope it could keep flowing until death stop the water.

Little that I know, that it could break too soon. Too soon before i put the glass on a high place, a place where nobody can reach, but can be seen and also use by us, no one else.Just us.

Shattered glass seems to be everywhere, all over the place. NO glue could fix this. Not even if i pick every inch of glasses to make a new glass, NO.Nothing can fix this.

Too many tears shed, God knows how silent scream can break any other glasses exist around me. Only god knows. Day and Night, every second of my life I wish that I could find something, anything, anyone who can fix the glass. I love this glass so much. So much.

What I can see, is a beautiful broken glass. Broken glass that pierce my heart. It bleeds and bleeds more every each day.Yet, he is beautiful, shiny still, my broken glasses. Although nothing can fix this, I picked up every inch of it,and keep the memories, and keeping it with me. As long as it does'nt break any further.

Please don't break any further.

God, please give me courage and strength to go through this.

Still

2013-05-29T04:10:00.000-07:00

To write a story, to share with people what I feel. I do not know if anybody cares, but I just feel like sharing, telling, maybe someone will listen. That is enough.

No emotion filled my heart lately, and I do not know why. No sadness, no anger, no joy. Nothing. Instead, I feel scared for almost EVERYTHING.

I might can FEEL easily, but TO LET GO is not my dictionary. I keep asking myself, what do you want.

Yes Nabilah, what do YOU want?

At one point, I was sure what I wanted. Now I do not know. I keep avoiding all these, because I can feel the air stuck between the epiglottis. I just want to vomit whenever I am thinking of doing this matter that I want to do.

I want nothing but to be happy. But right now, I am just scared.

P/S- I don't know what I want,still

White horses

2013-05-28T03:55:00.000-07:00

Had a lovely weekend over with cousins and friends. Such a perfect situation, I was entirely sure every conversation we talked, I would fit in,blend it, perfectly.

Until, one question come up.

" Kau nak khawin umur berapa nab?"

That is a very sensitive question, people. I chose and accept the situation, do not brought it up.

Please.

P/s- Jodoh di tangan Tuhan.

Friend's 21st

2013-04-29T21:40:00.001-07:00

My first time to Indian 21st Birthday Party, and I must say it is quite lovely, I don't have much pictures, so I just took from Facebook that they tagged me. So anyway, Susila- The Birthday girl, she requested for us to wear Indian costumes. I decided to wear Punjabi Suit since I can't fit to saree. Sexaay yaw.

Credit to the photographer and the owner of the suit :)

We had little traditional dancing over there, which was quite funny. Maybe because the fact we we had to dance in front of old people. Ackward.

Group picture that have been uploaded to facebook.

Till next time.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SUSILA !

Can you please hide your stretch mark? Its ugly

2013-04-23T06:09:00.001-07:00

I don't really like to post this kind of thing, but this one girl.She pissed me off every time, since i the moment i saw her. But one funny thing is, she is being hypocritically nice so I stuck with her, for almost one year.

So, I ran away before i change to that figure. Due to recent event moving becoming the back seater, it was the thing I always scared to do but I finally did it. Running away way easier than to face it. Cowardly I went away, Oh my god, just one glance look at her. You know you will just hate her.

I know this is mean. But trust me, she did worst. I am just too angry to feel guilty

Hoping for a paradigm shift.

2013-04-22T00:12:00.000-07:00

Today is just like every other day as a medical student. okay, not like other day , really. But the whole paradigm of Monday is there.

test.review test.long break.lecture. mentoring.lunch. lab

the difference is today we finish the lab in half an hour. Just comparing some blood glucose reading for Diabetes Mellitus status. Prick blood, count the equation and GO.

I just wish there will be a very random surprising day. I think I hope too high. and it is disappointing :(

Endorphin Party

2013-04-21T02:15:00.001-07:00

Yep, that's right.
Sport's spirit is everywhere. I remembered it was years and years ago since I participated in any kind of competition and enjoyed it.

Badminton is not an easy game people. I learned it in a hard way after knee injury, shoulder sprain and do not forget after being smashed straight away to your eye ball and nose.

Nevertheless, i think i will do better in badminton than futsal. Great game everyone.

NBL and Futsal Team !

Sport spirit everyone !

Almost all of us.

Of course after winning most of the game, we had our victory party later that night :)

Freaking awesome victory party !