Not My Year

once

2009-10-15T17:20:00.001-04:00

The wind screams loudly past my door
Carrying vestiges of you
Vain attempts to force
You in

You lived
So loudly in my life
Once

And now
You’re nothing but wind

letters

2009-02-04T14:18:00.004-05:00

and letters
float to the front of my mind
like whispers
conveyed
and faded
on the wind

letters
baring our souls
to the computer screen
in the early morning hours
while the world slept

baring our souls
through a buffer
'cause its easier
than face to face

through a buffer
so I didn't have to hide my excitement
at your name

so I didn't have to hide my excitement
at your voice
speaking mine

© 2009 by Danielle Romanick

of romeo and snow

2009-01-13T11:59:00.013-05:00

you reside
where relaxation abides
by no rule or interruption
the calm felt
when wrapped in your arms
and you

entangled

peace found me
in deep deep slumber
and in the lazy smile
on your lips
tranquility drifted
down upon us
like snow

like silence

and you exist
in a world
rife
with challenge
that you weather
with a wink
and a song
your laughter
like a soft rolling thunder

you looked at me then
unspoken words across
your skin
and with content filled sighs
i read them
and watched
in wonder
blithe to be
a leading lady
in the land
of romeo and snow

© 2009 by Danielle Romanick

fall

2008-09-28T17:31:00.003-04:00

If leaves could speak

they would say
nothing

only whistle as they glide

content in landing
where they may

© 2008 by Danielle Romanick
written 2007

someones something

2008-04-14T11:09:00.007-04:00

i'd rather be
someones freedom
someones kingdom
someones fuse
someones muse
someones light
someones ms. right
someones connection
someones ressurection
someones happy ending
someones everything

© 2008 by Danielle Romanick

painters block

2008-03-11T17:34:00.002-04:00

the little blond girl
in a white dress
sits on my easel

unfinished

the ocean tide laps at her feet
threatening to sweep away
her almost existence.

© 2008 by Danielle Romanick

2008-03-04T17:25:00.005-05:00

I sat at my desk like I do everyday
Useless searching And typing away
Looking for one page TAX 550 starting with XC
not LW in a database of 200 thousand and three
when suddenly
I remembered what it felt like to kiss you
Back in high school
In your living room
How comfortable I felt on your L shaped couch
the softness of your lips
the innocence of a boy who didn’t really know
how to kiss
the smell of your cologne
(that still finds me in the city)
and your house
candles and cigarettes.
And I paused and remembered you
And all the smiles you brought me
And I paused – long enough to smile
And be a little sad
At the many wrong turns
I may have made.

© 2008 by Danielle Romanick

2008-03-02T12:56:00.003-05:00

he claimed it
took what was not his
to take
layer by layer
stripped it
of all its idiosyncrasy
every bit
that made it special
gone away
until it existed
naked
nothing more than a
sullen,
plain,
fragment
of faded glory

© 2008 by Danielle Romanick

life, anxiety, and hammocks

2008-02-25T13:01:00.008-05:00

If we didn’t fight so much. And if I reminded you more of the girl you used to think was “the one”. And if Mercury never went into retrograde. And if I left you a million messages and notes a day. And if I wasn’t “difficult”. And if you didn’t have to work so much. And if we could be young again. And if I did everything differently. And if I didn’t take you so seriously. And if you had seen what else was out there for you while you had the chance. And if grass really isn’t greener on the other side, but grayer. And if we were older. And if you were ready. And if I wasn’t. And if we were even in the same book only 5 pages apart. And if I didn’t feel like I was failing again. And if somehow we could find our way through this. And if we couldn’t keep our hands off each other. And if I didn’t want 4 kids. And if we could be happy. And if I never mentioned our house. And if you didn’t have to think about mowing the lawn. And if I would cook more often. And if we could talk about being in love for the rest of our lives. And if you could look at me with love in your eyes laugh and tell me I can’t get another puppy. And if I got one anyway. And if it was a golden Labrador. And if I was healthy. And if we could have dinner parties. And if I was proud of you and you were proud of me. And if my family didn’t drive everyone crazy. And if you told me you couldn’t decide on a fall or summer wedding. And if all of my friends were jealous again. And if you looked at me and saw a life full of light and laughter and children. And if I wasn’t afraid. And if you were the sure one. And if we never, ever, ever ate tofu. And if I gave up everything I wanted except for you. And if I was sweeter. And if you were less angry. And if we could actually go on vacations. And if I learned how to not be sarcastic. And if I didn’t spell theatre with an “R-E”….. Then?

Then could could we have a hammock in our backyard?

harvest moon

2008-02-19T11:58:00.003-05:00

the moon hung low that night
low, scarred and a deep orange
like fruit ready to fall
from the comfort of being high on a limb
she felt sympathy for the moon
stuck inbetween

she glanced up
one last time
and felt
kindred

© 2008 by Danielle Romanick

harvest moon two

2008-02-19T11:45:00.001-05:00

* So I apparently wrote this poems twice -the plan was to erase "harvest moon" and replace it with the following rewritten one. As it turns out - I like them both. *

walking late
into the night
searching for reasons
in past regrets
the skies hold
a harvest moon
hung low
stained
deep orange
supple fruit
ripe and about to fall
ready to be torn away
from the comfort of the orchard tree

i felt sympathy
for the moon
stuck in the world of
in between

on the cusp
of being thrust into
somewhere it
desires not to go

as I walk away
i glanced back
and felt
for a moment
kindred

© 2008 by Danielle Romanick

you and I

2008-01-29T11:22:00.002-05:00

so different
you and I
I the low, and you
the high tide
your edges are soft
mine
are jagged and weathered

your way
draws them in
moths to your
inner flame
your smile
their window

my way
my manipulation
of words
shocks them
with what I can form

© 2008 by Danielle Romanick

shades of red

2008-01-29T11:15:00.004-05:00

and so
i grab a pen
hold it tight- purpose coursing through my fingers
and I write litanies on my wall
rationalizations in vermillion
excuses in crimson
justifications in carmine
reasons
why i hate
and love
and wake
in a cold sweat

i've never been one
for shades of red

© 2008 by Danielle Romanick

Lyrics to "I'm"

2008-01-12T22:30:00.001-05:00

Your voice
crosses the distance
crossing miles
crossing loneliness
off of the list
of things
I'd rather not discuss
like us

I'm fine now
I'll be okay
I've lived through
the fear of
living
without you one day

and I'm fine
and I'm near
being through
saying I love you
a thousand times
just so you can hear

if you can't see
that baby you mean the world to me
by now
somehow
then let's call a truce
cause its no use
yea, let's call a truce
we're no use
for love

at the end of the story
in movie montage glory
i want the true kind
the blue kind
the passion big and unfurled
i want the guy
who wants to be the guy
that gets the girl

And I'm fine
and I'm finally happy
with me
and I'll be
the belle of my own ball
if you won't dance with me

your voice
cannot cross me
and I've added this
to that list
of things I won't discuss
like us

used to be

2008-01-12T11:12:00.003-05:00

there used to be a time
when he answered her calls
like breathing
his only connection
to the world of the living
there used to be a time
when he
was only for her
and innocence and love shrouded them
when times were never easy
but at the thin end of the line
felt
right
there used to be a time
when she knew
who to love
and
which way
was up

© 2008 by Danielle Romanick

nyc

2008-01-11T11:09:00.004-05:00

rainy new york mornings
buildings fade into invisibility
long fingers reaching into the fog
grasping infinity

© 2008 by Danielle Romanick

twisted

2008-01-10T11:07:00.005-05:00

there is little joy left
in the idea of you
so little remains
for me to cling to
i read you
like an open book
all summed up
just one look
your inner monologue
alights your face
your case of imaginary characters
gone to waste

© 2008 by Danielle Romanick

dissapointment

2008-01-08T17:11:00.002-05:00

I want to convey to you
dissapointment
like lead
sinking
towards my toes
or
a child
clad in hat and gloves
scarf wrapped tight
face
pressed against the window
not a snowflake in sight

© 2008 by Danielle Romanick

fable

2008-01-08T17:00:00.002-05:00

that night
our fingers drew across the sky
images
how we wanted our future to be
constellations of us
the fable of you and me

© 2008 by Danielle Romanick

Happy New Year!

2008-01-02T12:20:00.000-05:00

Around New Years, every year, I tend to look back over what has happened in my life, where I thought I was going, where I ended up, and where I go from here. I'm sure most people do. Then comes the point where people make their resolutions. I haven't made a resolution in years. I thought they were silly, and no one ever stuck to them anyway so what was the point? This year is different. This year I am making changes to my life, making resolutions and sticking to them.

I've realized that my writing dwindled down in the second half of 2007. That realization made me somewhat sad. This past year I've been able to just get back into writing after a 4 year hiatus I refer to as "college". It made me sad to think that it died down so quickly. So I resolved to post something twice a week. I know that doesn't sound like a lot - especially considering some of my blogger friends who rarely miss a day. But its a step for me. And I spend 3 hours of my day on trains - you'd think it would be no problem to write. But sometimes my mind just wants to take a nap and creativity is not an option. :)

I've also been told that with a new out look and a new optimism on the coming year - it may be a good idea to change the name of my blog. :) Not My Year was named in 2007 using a song by the Weepies. It was one of those songs that, listening to it, fits your life so accurately at that time - you swear some one is psychically making money off your brainwaves. But that was last year - the song (while still a favorite) does not exemplify 2008. So its time for a new title. No drum roll... I don't know what it's going to be yet. These things take a little time to figure out.

Thanks to everyone who keeps coming around to read my little words and who made this last year so fulfilling for me.

Happy New Year and Good Resolution-ing!

i think too much in the shower

2007-12-22T11:04:00.002-05:00

glitch

2007-12-21T11:27:00.001-05:00

as we walk the streets
listening to unending dissonance
stories of lies and love
the fury and rumble of madness
swept past underneath me
and the man on the corner lowers himself
asking help
no sight lack of left limb
his heart reaches out to me
on a blazing Saturday
and we walk by
my heart sinks
no one notices
not even a glitch
in the conversation

© 2007 by Danielle Romanick

passive regret

2007-11-08T12:09:00.002-05:00

a thought breeds inside me
like ivy
wrapping itself
coiling
around my spine
barricading my heart
so your small attempts to hurt
go almost unnoticed
it lets me live as you never would

and I
throw morals at you
fistfulls of frameworks
how you would exist
if you were a real boy
and they bounce off your plastic undetected

rules of benevolence
and respect
lost upon you
or simply lack a warm place
within your cold
you lie to me like breathing
and mar even easier
guiltless in your world
and smiling

you live your "life"
as you always wanted
sex and substances
lacking life
shrouded in a thick coat
of a perception you’ve created
as good, honest, reliable
rather than the true blue you underneath
painting me awful for keeping you
safe and afloat
how dare I
you live your "life"

sex and substances

and disregard
have you told them the smallest truth
why our nights were so cold
when I was so warm
or have you lied
to keep your ego from going limp
as well

simplicity is this
no longer can i be disregarded, lied to
no longer can i be painted in a pale shade of insanity
solely for the reason that the view of me
looks better on you
no longer will i listen to you
or accept false apologies
issue the bare minimum again
of thinly veiled platitudes
variations of the lie that you are capable of caring
that you want me in your life
prove it
respect me
treat me as such
for all that I am
all that I have ever meant to you
and all that you have become because of me
or live your life
without me in it.

© 2007 by Danielle Romanick

*comment section contains an afterthought*

La Tortura - - Shakira and Alejandro Sanz

2007-11-07T10:33:00.001-05:00

AS: Ay payita mía Guárdate la poesía Guárdate la alegría pa'ti

S: No pido que todos los días sean de sol
No pido que todos los viernes sean de fiesta
Tampoco te pido que vuelvas rogando perdón
Si lloras con los ojos secos
Y hablando de ella

Ay amor me duele tanto
Me duele tanto (AS)
Que te fueras sin decir a donde
Ay amor, fue una tortura perderte

AS : Yo se que no he sido un santo Pero lo puedo arreglar amor

S : No solo de pan vive el hombre Y no de excusas vivo yo.

AS : Solo de errores se aprende Y hoy se que es tuyo mi corazón

S: Mejor te guardas todo eso A otro perro con ese hueso Y nos decimos adiós

No puedo pedir que el invierno perdone a un rosal
No puedo pedir a los olmos que entreguen peras
No puedo pedirle lo eterno a un simple mortal
Y andar arrojando a los cerdos miles de perlas

AS: Ay amor me duele tanto
Me duele tanto
Que no creas más en mis promesas

AS & S: Ay amor es una tortura perderte

AS : Yo se que no he sido un santo Pero lo puedo arreglar amor

S : No solo de pan vive el hombre Y no de excusas vivo yo.

AS : Solo de errores se aprende Y hoy se que es tuyo mi corazón

S : Mejor te guardas todo eso A otro perro con ese hueso Y nos decimos adiós

AS: No te bajes, no te bajes
Oye negrita mira, no te rajes
De lunes a viernes tienes mi amor
Déjame el sábado a mi que es mejor
Oye mi negra no me castigues más
Porque allá afuera sin ti no tengo paz
Yo solo soy un hombre arrepentido
Soy como el ave que vuelve a su nido

Yo se que no he sido un santo y es que no estoy hecho de cartón

S : No solo de pan vive el hombre Y no de excusas vivo yo.

AS : Solo de errores se aprende Y hoy se que es tuyo mi corazón

S : Ay ay ay
Ay, todo lo que he hecho por ti
Fue una tortura perderte
Y me duele tanto que sea asi
Sigue llorando perdón Yo... yo no voy
A llorar por ti

- Shakira and Alejandro Sanz

bored :) not related to poems whatsoever....

2007-10-22T12:11:00.000-04:00

What Famous Leader Are You?
personality tests by similarminds.com

First time I took "Which classic movie are you" I got this as my answer...

second time I got this.....

What Classic Movie Are You?
personality tests by similarminds.com

how does that happen? :) Is it just me?