Notes from Nadir

The Joy of Melt and Pour Soap Crafting

2011-11-22T06:55:00.000-08:00

For the past two months my double boiler and I have been the best of friends. My kitchen is super clean and my bathroom is stocked with enough soap to starting selling … again! Yes, I've been making soap like it's the Christmas rush even before the official start date!

Key Lime Pie Soap

Last week at this time I was putting the finishing touches on a piece of Key Lime Pie soap for my new book, THE JOY OF MELT AND POUR SOAP CRAFTING. It's been fun getting back into it after a [nearly] two-year absence. But my next project, Leaving Nadir, is calling to me and I must complete that.

So that's what's been going on and I while it was fun to write and recreate some unique recipes, like Fruit of the Vine Wine soap, Coffee 'n Cream soap, Soapsicles, and even my signature Hollywood Fruit, Nuts & Flakes soap, I look forward to my return to fiction.

Have a wonderful Thanksgiving!

THE JOY OF MELT AND POUR SOAP CRAFTING

Help Me Name a Soap!

2011-11-10T07:36:00.000-08:00

Yes, I'm almost done taking photos for my forthcoming soap crafting book! I've been crafting soap, and other bath & body products, for years. I've been planning an entire series of books, and only this month does it look like I'll finally have that soap book finished! It's called THE JOY OF MELT AND POUR SOAP CRAFTING and it'll be available on Kindle, B&N and Smashwords around November 19th.

Before it's completed, I need your help in naming a soap! The backstory is that when I was at the supermarket I discovered a 4-pack of colorful plastic gelatin molds. For $2 it was a great deal and they make some beautiful looking soaps. Currently, it's called Gelatin Soap, but I'm sure a better and catchier name can be found.

Name this soap!!!

The soap is a combination of clear melt and pour base, magenta mica [a natural mineral colorant], and strawberry fragrance.

So what do you get if you supply the name of this soap?

1. A copy of the book in either the .PDF or Kindle format.

2. Your name will be listed in the Acknowledgments section right in the front of the book!

Let me know what you think this soap should be called and the winner will be listed here! If you could do so by the weekend, that would be excellent!

11/16/11 UPDATE! Thanks everybody! A name has been found & the individual insists upon anonymity! I'll reveal the soap's new name next week after the book has been released.

SQUIRRELS IN THE HOOD is in Your E-Hood!

2011-09-21T06:37:00.000-07:00

If you love squirrels, cats and birds, you're in the right place! I discovered the joy of photographing squirrels in my L.A. neighborhood due to their close proximity. And I learned a lot about squirrelly behavior!

Squirrels in the Hood was originally written by hand in a notebook but I finally found some time to transcribe it into Word. The photos I'd taken really helped to shape the story. So, here's the official blurb.

When Sunshine the cat departs in 2006, the second story balcony she occupied is very empty. Now that birds can be fed, the author does so, also attracting an array of hungry squirrels. Follow the adventures of Alpha, Doc, Cocoa Butter and other squirrel-friends as they dine in the Bird & Squirrel Café located in the Miracle Mile district of Los Angeles. Squirrels in the Hood includes 19 color photos taken by the author.

I've also included my first book trailer. Thanks to Alex Cavanaugh, the author of CassaStar, I was able to see how cool book trailers are. I wasn't aware that books even had trailers! I was inspired to try making my own.

Squirrels in the Hood - B&N

Squirrels in the Hood - Amazon

Squirrels in the Hood - Smashwords

Hollywood Office Temp

2011-07-06T07:52:00.000-07:00

Although I've written a little about Hollywood in NOTES FROM NADIR, the majority of the book takes place far, far away from the proverbial glitter and glitz of Hollywood.

What really happened in Hollywood? How long was I out there? Did I work in the entertainment industry? Did I meet lots of celebrities?

Some answers. I originally wrote HOLLYWOOD OFFICE TEMP [H.O.T.] many years ago. This book is partially based on my years working in and out of the wonderful world of showbiz. My character, Chris Yarborough, is just that, someone who might have a few similarities to me. This book is based on people I met in Lalaland, I have also incorporated other peoples' stories to make this a better read. Some of the characters names have been changed to protect the innocent … and the guilty.

I'm also still working on the manuscript for LEAVING NADIR.

***

Chris Yarborough is a Midwesterner as green as the corn back home in Ohio. This former bookstore employee moves out to Los Angeles to pursue a profitable career in screenwriting.

Without an instant script sale, she stumbles upon an ad that reads: TYPE YOUR WAY TO THE STARS! The company is in a prestigious Century City high rise and she works there until the company closes. Out of work, her career as a temp is launched.

Chris temps in an East L.A. warehouse where the elderly owner is carried to her office to downtown where she discovers Banksluts, Inc. Other jobs in studios bring her in contact with famous actors. She learns that as a temp, she is the maid of the secretarial world. One employer says, "If you don't want to use her you can send her away."

As she searches for a literary agent and that elusive script sale, Chris encounters an array of unusual characters. A partying apartment manager, an important film director who could launch her career, a lawyer with an office furnished in kindergarten motif, and several household names. Sometimes working in the entertainment biz, including stints at Playboy, Universal Studios and Warner Bros., to jobs in unrelated fields, the plucky screenwriter perseveres.

HOLLYWOOD OFFICE TEMP is written in diary format. We are shown the excesses of the 1990's as a nobody tries to become a somebody in Hollywood. Here's a new interview!

Notes from Nadir ~ The Interview!

2011-06-06T06:30:00.000-07:00

I've recently been interviewed about my novel, Notes from Nadir. It was a novel interview [pun intended!] in that I got to make up some of the questions that I could ask and answer about how this book came into being.

Instead of using the sample excerpt that is seen when the book's downloaded, I got to choose what part of the book I wanted to share. That's fun to do as the reader can see a "new" area of the story.

Much to everyone's relief, it's not a mega-long interview so I didn't get bored doing it! If you're interested, here's the link:

ANOTHER HOLLYWOOD EBOOK WINNER ANNOUNCED!

2011-05-31T11:58:00.000-07:00

Due to the fact that one of the winners of THE HOLLYWOOD FICTION E-BOOK CONTEST was unable to collect their prize, I'm now announcing another winner!

This individual was chosen randomly by another draw of names. Who is this fifth winner? Let me give you a hint: he's quite a prolific writer and blogger!

Stephen Tremp, SOUTH OF SUNSET

Make sure you visit his blog as he has some great news of his own to share!

Thank you for entering the contest, Stephen!

Stop by every Monday and Thursday to read LEAVING NADIR.

4 Contest Winners Revealed!

2011-05-25T07:38:00.000-07:00

I'm happy to announce the four bloggers who won ebooks in the HOLLYWOOD FICTION E-BOOK CONTEST! I also want to thank all the entrants who took the time to enter the contest.

As with the last contest, I want to reveal how their names were chosen. I typed each entrant's name and/or screen name and book choice on a piece of paper and printed it out. Then I cut all the names out individually and divided them into the two categories: those who wanted to win NORTH OF SUNSET and those who wanted to read the short stories contained in SOUTH OF SUNSET. There were three individuals who were in the "either" category and I chose two for one title and one for the other. Then I placed the South of Sunset names inside a shoe box, which I covered and shook several times. I opened and pulled out two names. I repeated the process for North of Sunset and came up with the second two recipients.

OK, enough, who are they?

Here are four talented bloggers whose names were chosen. I also include their links so that you can check out their blogs.

ANN BEST, NORTH OF SUNSET

LAURA KAY, NORTH OF SUNSET

OLD KITTY, SOUTH OF SUNSET

CONDA V. DOUGLAS, SOUTH OF SUNSET

THE HOLLYWOOD FICTION E-BOOK CONTEST

2011-05-09T05:19:00.000-07:00

There's a new e-book contest here at Notes from Nadir!

Do you like Hollywood? Ever been there? Want to read about it? Now you can – for absolutely no cost!

FOUR people will win free Kindle e-book editions of my novel, NORTH OF SUNSET or my short story collection, SOUTH OF SUNSET!

Just leave a comment saying which free Hollywood e-book you want. Please include your email address. You can write it out to avoid spam.

Your chances improve if you are a Notes from Nadir and/or Leaving Nadir blog subscriber.

Also, you can request a .PDF file if you don't want the Kindle version.

Winners will be chosen by a random draw of names on Wednesday, May 25, 2011. The four winners will have their names and blog links posted in a special blog entry.

CONTEST ENDS TUESDAY, MAY 24, 2010. Due to international time differences, the cut off time is midnight PST.

Stop by every Monday and Thursday to read LEAVING NADIR.

Leaving Nadir Returns Monday, April 18, 2011

2011-04-14T08:42:00.000-07:00

"Leaving Nadir" is returning to blogland! I've been writing blogs in order to keep ahead of myself, but have also completed two non-fiction books. One is mentioned in a previous blog, but the latest one is the first ever e-book all about Monoi de Tahiti!

I've missed visiting so many versatile bloggers here and am trying to work out a schedule where I can read blogs uninterrupted every day.

Writing this sequel has been difficult for me. I'm keeping everything rated PG-13 but when it comes time to write the first draft of the book, I won't be able to keep it that mild.

So, if you want to refresh your memory of that Nadirian place, here's the Index. The blog will pick up right where it left off.

Hope to see you again on Monday, April 18!

Stop by every Monday and Thursday to read LEAVING NADIR.

Been Away – But Not At Play!

2011-02-21T08:35:00.000-08:00

I've been on a leave of absence from writing "Leaving Nadir" as I was involved in co-writing a nonfiction e-book. Haven't written one of those in a while -- the last one was about ice skating and that was a few years ago. Unlike my skating e-book, which also had to be fact-filled and accurate, "Paranormal Reality: Investigating Paranormal State" involved viewing lots of footage and listening to audio. I also interviewed several people. That was fun. One interviewee went from saying please quote me to, oh no, don't reveal my name. Did that change things? You betcha!

Maybe you have or haven't heard of the A&E TV show, "Paranormal State". It began in 2007 and is now in its last season. If you've watched it, you know it's about a group of paranormal investigators seeking proof of ghosts. It's different than "Ghost Hunters" [the SyFy show that paved the way]. In each episode of "Paranormal State" you can see psychics and paranormal investigators trying to help distraught families troubled by haunted houses.

This book is a bit of a departure for me and I'm an unbiased enough to write about the paranormal field. I've learned more about people who seek out paranormal matters and appreciate the fact that they have so much enthusiasm for their work.

My next goal is to get back to working on Leaving Nadir and continuing that journey. It should be back next month.

3 Contest Winners Revealed!

2011-01-01T08:01:00.000-08:00

Maybe you could feel the tension building as it neared the stroke of midnight last night! Many of you must have been wondering who the winning three bloggers would be in the Better Than Chocolate Kindle E-Book Contest.

Before I announce that, I want to reveal how were their names chosen. The old-fashioned way! I typed each entrant's name and/or screen name on a piece of paper and printed it out. Then I cut all the names out individually and placed them inside a shoe box, which I covered and shook several times. There was a hole in one side of it as this was a box that was destined for the recycling bin, and the first 3 names that slid out are the people who will receive NOTES FROM NADIR as a gift via their email.

I also want to thank all the entrants who took the time to read and comment on the blog.

So, who are the recipients?

These three talented bloggers who were nice enough to enter. I also include their links so that you can check out their blogs.

The Words Crafter [The Rainy Day Wanderer]

Neurotic Workaholic ~ Obsessions of a Workaholic

Jemi Fraser ~ Just Jemi

Thanks for stopping by! Wishing everyone a wonderful, prosperous, healthy, writing and reading-filled 2011! J

Stop by every Monday and Thursday to read the continuing adventures at my LEAVING NADIR blog.

A Naughty Narcissist's Yuletide Greetings!

2010-12-23T06:57:00.000-08:00

I've decided to include an excerpt from my novel Love Me, Need Me: A Narcissist's Tale due to the wacky Christmas scene it contains. The narcissistic main character, Arlen J. Stevenson, is a Southern zombie author and public speaker. This scene is from a December speaking gig for firefighters and their wives in a small Southern town…

Warning: Rated PG-13!

Well, I needed to get more festive as it was warming up to be a very merry Christmas for me and I thought, well hell, who sang the best Christmas songs in the world? Me! Because I'd just composed Arlen's Christmas Song and it was gonna get a deal with Sony Music next year.

I went back over to my briefcase and pulled out my Lucky Santa cap with the mistletoe attached to it. I removed the first one and put the new one on my head and went over to the mic and pulled it off its stand.

“Ladies and gentlemen--let me make this the best Christmas show you’ve ever attended. Why? Because there is a special Christmas treat for y'all, that’s why! This is an original musical composition!”

I cleared my throat and began singing, "Here's your Christmas present, baby," and smiled, shook my hips a little to warm myself up and began…

“I said, here's your Christmas present, baby…” I was directing my vocal offerings at Daisy, the sexy ol gal in the back of the room and smiled at her, swishing my hips slowly back and forth, hinting that later on in the evening me and her could share some naked rockin’ and rollin’ in my motel room. I wished to hell she read minds, as I was getting hotter than hell thinking of what that ol gal must be like in the sack. She seemed to be grooving on it too, but I thought maybe I should continue on and do something Christmassy first before coming onto her up close and personal-like.

"Are you gonna pull my red ribbon tonight?" I warbled in a loud, musical voice. "Red ribbon…and if I'm lucky you'll take it through the back door…" I went over to the Christmas tree at the back of the stage and admired it as I sang: “Oh I'm your Christmas present, baby…” extending the lyrics, fondling a large gold ornament, but not quite expecting it to crash to the stage floor and break loudly, but not nearly as loud as my strong tenor.

Time to get off the stage, and I switched hands on the mic and walked into the crowd, working it like the paid professional public speaker/singer I proudly am. I began slowly clapping in time to my singing and encouraging the audience to follow me, even clapping my hands above my head a few times. But they just sat there like some of my zombie characters.

I was making my way over to the sexy broad, but I stopped in front of a grandmaesque fat woman with a few tufts of cotton candy blue hair and thought of singing Blue Christmas to her, but decided to keep on singing what I was and I stood kinda close to her and rocked my hips suggestively as I sang. "Once you unwrap me, baby, you won't need Elvis anymore!" But hell, she was too ugly to kiss so I just pretended like the mistletoe wasn’t there as I made my way over to the hottie with the big, nursable boobs.

On my way across the room I continued to sing, smiling at some ol gal in a wheelchair and deciding to flirt with her. I put my hand on the back of her chair. And I made her feel real good by pushing her wheelchair around in slow, sexy circles as I sang, "If I'd've been in Hollywood I'd've been the leading man and Elvis would work at a shoe store."

She seemed a little bluer in the hair and redder in the face so I stopped the ride and by that time I had found my way over to Miss Daisy who was beaming up at me adoringly. Damn, I was gonna be giving her the Christmas love package a little early this year! I stripped off my sport jacket and my hips were a rockin’ back and forth and I sang directly to her "I'm your Christmas present, baby, touch me and watch your present growwwww". I extended my arms to show how much, and was gonna lean on in to the sexiest woman in the room and get my mistletoe over her head and get my reward…

And that’s when some porky ol gal comes up behind me, interrupting me, by informing me: “Thank you Arlen J. Stevenson for your, uh, performance. But it looks like it’s time for our dinner to be served. Please join us!”

I smiled tightly at her and nodded in thanks. Some fat slob who thought dinner was more important than my groinal gratification had just interrupted my spectacular holiday musical performance.

Note: There will be no Thursday blog at the Leaving Nadir site. The story will continue on Monday, December 27th.

E-Book Contest & North of Sunset

2010-12-17T18:05:00.000-08:00

Yes, the new blog, Leaving Nadir is keeping me busy twice a week. But not too busy to remind everyone who hasn't entered the Better Than Chocolate Kindle E-Book Contest that you have until 12/31 to enter. All you have to do is mention that you want to win 1 of 3 copies of NOTES FROM NADIR and leave your email addy [write it out if you like]. Winners will be notified on January 1 right after the drawing. I'll also post a special blog to announce this.

NEW BOOK! North of Sunset

There's a long history to my latest Kindle release, North of Sunset. First written in 1996, it was e-published in 2000. The company went under and in 2004 it was "published" by what turned out to be a vanity press. It still remains on Amazon in paperback format at $19.95 but no copies are available. Ever since 2005 I retain all rights to North of Sunset. And it's been extensively edited since then.

Since I worked in the film industry, I was able to have firsthand knowledge about what went on in some of those stately homes just off Sunset Boulevard. Here's what this book is about:

It's 1996 and Hollywood is thriving in the era of indulgences. Sherman Lee is a volatile and successful action movie producer who seeks critical acceptance. Ever the partier, his excesses are starting to take their toll. He can't keep a personal assistant for more than a few days until Emily Karelin is sent to fill the position. She's a temp with no showbiz background, one of the requirements Sherman demands.

Emily is struggling to find what she wants out of life. The only thing that fills her nonworking hours is ice skating. She doesn't trust men due to a failed relationship with a pathological liar. When she works for Sherman, they discover their synchronistic style and are intrigued with each other. Sherman's longtime best friend, internationally renowned actor Wesley Barron, is aware of the producer's problems. He also wonders who this unknown and mysterious Emily is.

"North of Sunset" shows a segment of a power broker's jaded lifestyle. Even in one of the most expensive places to live in the world, sometimes you find what you're not looking for…

Leaving Nadir - Monday Post

2010-12-06T08:06:00.000-08:00

Hello Everybody!
Leaving Nadir is now live as of Friday, December 3rd.Here is a link to the second post, Leaving the Factory Early.
Leaving Nadir will have new blog posts every Monday and Thursday. I am also including a chronological Leaving Nadir INDEX so you can read blog entries in order.
If you wish to remain up to date, please become a follower at Leaving Nadir's blog!

Thank you!

LEAVING NADIR is LIVE!

2010-12-03T08:01:00.000-08:00

Hello Everybody!
Just wanted to give you a link to my new blog, LEAVING NADIR!
Here is a link to the first post, Mom's Last Day
Leaving Nadir will have new blog posts every Monday and Thursday. If you wish to remain up to date, please become a follower at Leaving Nadir's blog!

Thank you!

Contest, New Blog & New Book

2010-11-29T07:29:00.000-08:00

The Better Than Chocolate Kindle E-Book Contest! is going well and I have been adding each contestant's name to the growing list. You have until 12/31/10 to enter and have a chance to win one of 3 Kindle ebooks of my first title, Notes from Nadir. You don't need a Kindle as you can get a free Kindle app. Or you can request a PDF version.

Just leave a comment saying you're in the contest and you want to read Notes from Nadir. Your email address should be included and you can write it out to avoid spam. You also should be a Notes from Nadir blog subscriber.

'LEAVING NADIR' BLOG STARTS FRIDAY

The sequel to Notes from Nadir, Leaving Nadir, makes its debut on Friday, December 3, 2010.

BRAND NEW KINDLE BOOK ARRIVES

In 2007 I wrote the first of many drafts of my newest book entitled Love Me, Need Me: A Narcissist's Tale. Unlike Notes from Nadir, this book is rated "R" due to the subject matter. If you have an active book review site or blog and would like to review a PDF version of this title, please contact me. Here is a summary that is even suitable for those readers under 18!

Middle-aged Arlen J. Stevenson hails from Alabama. He's a bumbling sexual predator, narcissist, and author of three insipid zombie books. His relentless and often hilarious pursuit of women online leads him to our other protagonist, Los Angeles-based writer of term papers, Helena Hoffman. She isn’t aware of what Arlen is as she only sees his amusing and entertaining side in their daily email correspondence.

Told in alternating points of view, we see Arlen’s self-absorbed lifestyle as he endeavors to meet his numerous catches all over the South. Helena and Arlen get friendlier via their online communication, and he invites her to be his personal manager because of her communications skills, gullibility factor and location. She launches a MySpace site for his new company. Soon he realizes there are thousands of available women in his region alone! Unlike the jailbait that many online stalkers pursue, Arlen chases after their mothers and grandmothers. Helena is aware of his perpetual cheating and decides to investigate it in person. What happens after that is alternately scary and darkly humorous. Warning: Contains graphic sexual content and language.

Better Than Chocolate Kindle E-Book Contest!

2010-11-15T12:48:00.000-08:00

I want to thank each and every one of you who stops off here and reads my blog. I began writing Notes from Nadir back in March and, like all newbies, I began with no followers and no readers. How much that has changed! And the result has been that I have turned a blog into a book!

To celebrate, I'm holding a Better Than Chocolate Kindle E-Book Contest! which runs through the end of the year.

3, count 'em, THREE people will win a free Kindle ebook edition of NOTES FROM NADIR! No, you don't need a Kindle, as you only need a FREE Kindle app. Here's the link.

So, what do you have to do to be eligible to win a free copy of Notes from Nadir? Not much! And it's all done online!

Just leave a comment saying you're in the contest and you want a free e-book. Your email address should be included and you can write it out to avoid spam.

To increase your chances, you should be a Notes from Nadir blog subscriber.

To enhance your chances even more, you can also subscribe to my forthcoming blog Leaving Nadir. This blog will be active in early December as the story continues to unfold.

If you want to have an even better shot at winning a free, brand new Kindle e-book, come over and see some fun pictures and be a friend at Facebook.

I'm new over here at Open Salon.com, but stop by and say hi.

Also, you can request Notes from Nadir as a .PDF file if you don't have or want the Kindle version.

Winners will be chosen by a random draw of names on January 1, 2011. The winners will have their names and blog or website links posted in a special blog entry.

CONTEST ENDS FRIDAY, DECEMBER 31, 2010. Due to international time differences, the cut off time is midnight PST.

Notes from Nadir on Kindle: First Review!

2010-11-01T08:09:00.000-07:00

Thank you for all the congratulations I've received on getting "Notes from Nadir" from blog form to Kindle form! It went through a lot of expansion and editing to refine it to its current version.

Fiction and non-fiction writer/blogger Talli Roland was kind enough to review a copy of Notes from Nadir. Not only am I pleased with her five-star review, I thank her for the summary she has supplied!

"I first started reading this memoir through the author's blog, and I was quickly hooked by her conversational, down-to-earth style. The book - with lots of new content not featured on the blog - follows the author as she leaves behind her LA life and returns to her roots, with lots of vignettes and familial snapshots along the way. A very enjoyable read about trying to fit back into a mould you no longer fit." Link to Amazon UK version.

I'd also like to let you know about Talli's blogfest to help her forthcoming novel, The Hating Game, out on December 1st when it makes a gigantic splash on Amazon!

December 1st is the date to remember!

Notes from Nadir is Here!

2010-10-22T10:21:00.000-07:00

Notes from Nadir is officially on Kindle! This novel introduces you to new characters and allows the reader to gain more insight into this oddly humorous situation. By meeting the relatives, the groundwork is established for my forthcoming sequel blog, Leaving Nadir.

Initially, I wasn't planning on residing in Nadir for more than a few months, so the omission of certain characters in the blog will make more sense in the Kindle version.

For those of you who have a blog and/or website and would like to review a .DOC or HTML version of Notes from Nadir, please send me an email at: lisamaliga@gmail.com

Notes from Nadir - Kindle version

Even if you don't own a Kindle, you can download a FREE Kindle reader for your PC or Mac here

If you live in the UK, here's a link to the Amazon.co.uk version.

OCTOBER UPDATE

2010-10-10T12:52:00.000-07:00

NOTES FROM NADIR is in the final stages of being edited. While I don't have an exact release date, it should be later this month if all continues on schedule.

This book is now novel length [approximately 59,000 words] and has new chapters and new characters. The reader learns much more about my situation back in Los Angeles and there is another major celebrity encounter.

Starting next month, LEAVING NADIR will continue where NOTES FROM NADIR left off.

New Book Cover & Excerpt!

2010-07-26T14:25:00.000-07:00

Greetings Blogger Friends!

Just wanted you to know that I’ve been trying to keep up with many of your blogs and of course I keep discovering new ones! Wish I had more time to read them, especially on a daily basis.

Got my new cover design and have put it on this profile and over on Facebook, but for your convenience, here it is...

NOTES FROM NADIR will be coming out toward the end of September – don’t have an exact date yet. I’ll let you know when I do.

Meanwhile, here’s another excerpt that dates back to the beginning of my stay in Nadir.

February 2009 - “Job Hunting In Hell”

Before Mom left for her part time office job at a nearby school, she made sure my laptop was hooked up and I was able to get online there and not on her old Dell PC from the turn of the century. Only a few months ago she had changed from dial-up to DSL!

As she was a senior citizen, she worked at her secretarial job no more than two hours at a time. Wasn’t much time at all, but at least I’d have the place to myself between the hours of 10 and noon. Oh yeah, and the maximum commute time of maybe 12 minutes gave me a little extra. In the old days, she would have walked there—but in the old days she worked 40-plus hours per week.

I lingered over tea and toast and took in the ambiance the gas fireplace created. All I did was flick on a switch, observe the manmade logs and flames imitate a real fire, and about 15 minutes later the fan clicked on and expelled heat. It was right next to the table so I was able to have breakfast in warmth. But I got so relaxed I miscalculated my time as I was reading another Charlaine Harris mystery I’d bought before I left entitled Shakespeare’s Christmas. I liked the heroine, Lily Bard, and she had her own cleaning service which meant she was self-employed. Reading about other places than the Left Coast sort of prepared me for being here. But only sort of. As I was engrossed in the adventures of a small town gal, I suddenly realized I wasn’t alone.

The sight of Mom coming inside lugging her canvas library bag made me feel guilty. I was supposed to be looking for work not lingering over breakfast was the vibe I got but she didn’t say it. When I returned to the sun room, I never referred to it as my room, I got online and began job hunting by emailing resumes. Mom thought I was “playing.”

Being the old-fashioned sort, she lectured: “You have to go out and look for a job. You can’t do it online they won’t remember you. Go out and you’ll stand out.” She also wanted to get rid of me, I reasoned.

I did so, spending the time driving around the area and familiarizing myself with where the farmland began and where the city ended. I was just driving and driving and looking at places where I wanted to work and seeing if there were any help wanted signs. In the age of the internet who hunted for jobs on foot or in a car? Yeah, I’d found my first job, even my third and fourth job that way – during the pre-WWW era.

Week 7 March 2009 – Bakery Blues

2010-04-09T14:54:00.000-07:00

The days were again chilly and dreary thanks to the abundant precipitation found in these parts. Rain had always depressed me. Out in California I had little reason to feel low and funky as it rained so infrequently. When it did rain it was usually a relief and rarely did it last more than a day or 2.

Here, it had been almost 6 unrelenting days in a row of rain, rain and more rain.

As I go on my p.m. job search I decided to head east. I end up in the artsy fartsy area and passed an old strip mall and saw a temp agency. Pulled into the small parking lot and thought about how I’d so far avoided the temp scene. It was mainly what I’d done in L.A. for several years. To the right of the temp agency was a bakery. Since I’d never worked in one before I thought it might be a fun place to clock in a few hours; certainly a change of pace.

I headed over there carrying my getting worn manila envelope that contained lots of resumes and my contact info. Also had amassed several applications that I hadn’t quite filled out fully. They were for places like chain stores and/or contained long and exhausting detail oriented looks into one’s work history and personal life. I knew the latter ones would be hitting the recycling bin but just hadn’t gotten around to it yet.

There was one an older woman in a green apron behind the glass counter. She had just finished putting away a tray of sweet rolls that my mom would have loved before being diagnosed as diabetic. I asked if they were hiring and the somber lady said they were taking applications. She started to go to the backroom to get me one but I smoothly pulled out a pale green resume [I had ‘em in different pastel colors] and this was taken by the doughy looking woman and inspected. I had an opportunity to look around the small place and noted a couple of tables and chairs like the kind they had outside in cafés in L.A.

“Can you work part time?” she asked, looking up from the paper.

“Sure.”

“We need someone over 18 that can run the bread slicing machine,” she pointed to a cumbersome contraption behind her that made me grimace. I didn’t want my finger getting stuck in that thing. Guess the lawsuits must be ridiculous for the under-18 crowd, I thought. But hey, some old fart loses a finger and no big deal, they got 9 more.

A customer entered just then and this portly man was quick to point out what he wanted and seemed to be a regular. As soon as the transaction was adeptly completed, she got back to me. “Are you a mom?”

Why the hell did people think that of me? Just because I was a female didn’t mean I was interested in spawning offspring. But I didn’t tell her that and gave her my standard response: No. She allows herself a smile. I’ve learned that meant one thing: I’m probably available to work suckers hours. Yep, that’s next. When am I available? How ‘bout never but I need money and I need to get away from mom every afternoon like I’m some sorta serial noisemaker. Heck, maybe I should invest in a pair of tap shoes…give the ol’ parental unit some real fun…

Upon learning that I could work afternoons I detected more positivity on her part as she continues to gaze at my resume. Of course she wonders why I left California and I simply tell her to be with my sick mom and that elicits sympathy.

She says her name is Becki and that she’ll be in touch with me soon. I remember this is an interview and that I’m supposed to show enthusiasm. So I quickly smile for the first time since entering the bakery, and leave.

At least I’m able to inform mom that not only did I have an interview, but I’ll hear back in a few days.

Just buying a little more time...

Click below to read the rest of the book.

Week 5 March 2009 – Nadir’s Suburban Antiques Roadshow

2010-04-07T14:44:00.000-07:00

I recently met the next door neighbor named Nancy. She’s slightly built and is more formally attired in a dressy pants suit and wears a thick layer of makeup that includes drawn on eyebrows. Nancy has been a Hampton Lake resident for five years and “she goes to church twice a week,” my mom claims, her voice a bit surprised. One of those churches down the main drag and believe me it was hard to tell ‘em apart as they were all different denominations of Christian. “That Kingdom Hall place finally bit the dust,” mom said. I vaguely recalled the place only because it was on a corner and resembled a log cabin. Now it’s a Marathon gas station.

“Nancy’s very respectful,” mom continues. “She even took her wind chimes down after I asked her to.” Mom points to the southeast facing window. “Her porch is right next to mine. They were always making noise.”

“Yeah, they tend to do that. I can’t believe you asked her to take ‘em down.”

“They were bothering me.” She had just sat down in her comfy canary yellow chair with her latest snack of a sugar free slice of strawberry cake.

The next day the rumors of spring finally gave way to the facts. The last of the snow had vanished, even those crusty black bits that clung to corners and northern facing spots. Grass seemed greener and more birds were singing and flying around. I guess ol’ Bobby Ray was busy with his cane chasing all manner of feathered creatures away from the “lake”.

Apparently, wildlife was a real nuisance. Another pond in a nearby neighborhood tract community was anti-bird. That community homeowner’s association also didn’t like wandering waterfowl, so they installed a short wire fence to keep them away. Birds aren’t stupid and they flew over it.

On that 60 degree Saturday, another phenomenon occurred that would continue all season and stop after the first frost: the garage/yard sale. In the “we loathe wildlife” community across the street, within sight, was a yard sale that beckoned. Cars and people clustered in that area and in the bright sunny day my mom wore her pink warmup suit and matching baseball cap with the extra large visor. Mom retained her sense of style as she had sewn on some white lace to make that hat look even more feminine though it was overkill. Pastel pink was as girly as you can get. But no matter how she gussied it up, mom wasn’t keen on wearing it. One of her doctors proclaimed that it was necessary when she went out into the sun, so she complied.

I selfishly hoped it was a compelling garage sale that was the Nadir equivalent of PBS’s “Antiques Roadshow” and she’d be gone for a while. I was in the sunroom which was living up to its name, especially as the yellow and white sheer curtains had recently been changed [by me with mom’s strict supervision]. Gazing outside in the peaceful spring morning I noticed a staggering drunk weave past the window. Drunk? On a Saturday morning? In suburban Nadir? Nah! That discombobulated person was my pink-attired mom. I went to the foyer to open the door as I figured I better check on her. She lurched inside and stood there, panting. She wasn’t drunk; she was really out of breath. Standing by the door that she managed to shut, she held onto the doorknob. I tried remembering the last time I’d ever seen her so … breathless. Mom wasn’t very athletic and she sure as heck had never gotten into that whole aerobics, running or jogging thing. Sure, she went for walks but they were sedate.

Slowly, she went over to the bench and sat down. Gradually her breathing returned to normal and she removed her hat. The sweatiness made her gray hair stick to her head and it seemed almost invisible. She fluffed it up with her shaky fingers and then got up, pretending that a walk across the street hadn’t almost knocked her out.

Her health was worse than ever. I wondered about all the prescription pills she popped twice a day. Some of ‘em were vitamins, but most of ‘em came from amber plastic jars and had weird names on the labels. As the weather was warm and wonderful that sunny Saturday, I was feeling too good to be worried. But part of me filed the incident in my mind and I found it disconcerting that she was suddenly so frail.

Week 4 Feb. 2009 – The Haunted Mausoleum

2010-04-05T09:01:00.000-07:00

After watching “The Amazing Race” on Sunday night, I open my email to receive a $100 surprise. I love surprises like that, they didn’t happen often. This payment is for an article I wrote a few years ago and I had to use a few different password combinations to figure out how to log onto the forgotten site. It now becomes a bookmarked site. It inspires me to find other articles I’d written and get my digital camera out and start taking pictures and earning moola. What a great combo, even though photo payment wasn’t high, it’s enough to motivate me to get in my car the next day and visit the local cemetery. Why? The lighting for one. Overcast, a common occurrence in Nadir, and the potential paranormal subject matter was another. Going by what I’d seen on cable TV, paranormal was hot. Of course mom didn’t have cable TV so I'm going by what I saw up until the end of January.

I put my camera in my purse and dress in my winter warmest to visit Nadir’s biggest boneyard -- Evergreen Cemetery. No one was clamoring to get into the place and there was mucho free parking. But what did I expect near the end of winter on a Monday? I mean, other than ghost hunters and people attending a funeral, who bothers visiting cemeteries?

The place is big enough for me to get lots of atmospheric photos as the day is typically overcast. I take some shots of these large marble walls filled with plastic flowers, flags, and streamers of various colors. Some of the walls have a place to see photos of the deceased. I’m saddened to see a man not much older than me posed happily on a beach with his large family. I wonder where it was and about the man who had died only last year.

After walking around and not seeing another living human being, the last person on earth scenario isn’t hard to imagine. I’m getting chillier by the minute and not wearing gloves isn’t helping my body temperature. Atop a small rise stands the mausoleum which is almost the size of the Admin building on the Warner Bros. lot—a place I’d been lucky enough to work in a few times about a decade ago. How long ago and faraway that famous studio seems given my current location.

Inside the mausoleum I notice two things: it’s deathly quiet and the vibes seem more ominous. I’m out of the cold and the wind, but what is inside is still. Fetid. And that sense increases the deeper into the mausoleum I go. Even though lights are on the environment seems darker due to the weather and the atmosphere.

The camera is set to “indoor” mode causing the flash to go off. I’d seen enough episodes of “Ghost Hunters” to know that even with my camera I’ll be able to capture ghostly activity. I come to a stairwell leading one direction – down. It looks pretty ominous due to the lack of light in the tile stairwell and the tall ladder that is standing at the darkest part that leads down a hallway containing more corpses concealed behind nameplates.

I squeeze off a shot before hurrying down those stairs. If I stand there pondering what is down there then I’ll leave. After all, I’m looking for some atmospheric/paranormal shots. Being in the right place at the right time will get me some much needed moola along with photo credits.

Just before I reach the last step I miss it as I’m falling horizontally through the air like I’m about to launch into a flying camel spin but I wasn’t wearing the right footwear. Time is suspended as I fall heavily to the ground with my camera hitting first and me second. To my astonishment the camera merely slaps the surface and slides a few inches. I examine it before I do my knees. There’s only a small scratch on the bottom, merely cosmetic damage as I switch it on and discover is works fine. Then I looked at myself and my jeans aren’t torn and nothing is broken but I feel sharp pain in my left ankle. I get up and walk around, trying to shake the pain away. It doesn’t budge. I immediately turn and walk back upstairs and down the hall, limping as I flee from that shadowy stairwell.

Outside I continue to walk around looking for pictures and getting some eerie looking ones. But I’m too scared to go back into the mausoleum. Instead of walking around on it for the next 45 minutes, I should have gone straight home and rested it. But it was only 2 o’clock and I would have interrupted one of my mom’s book reading fiestas.

Around 3:40 I returned, still jobless, but with several photos I’d previewed that might sell. I download them and my mom is exasperated with my latest scheme as I still haven’t gotten a job. That’s the first question she asks when I walk into the kitchen area where the comfy yellow chair and hassock have been given a new home. There’s an end table next to it so mom can keep her books, coffee cups and plates there. The woman is never far away from either her kitchen or some sort of snack, I’d observed.

In my room I’d removed my socks and see my ankle is now swollen and sporting a dark purple bruise across most of my foot. Later on mom sees me limping and I end up telling her the whole story. I have her sympathy but the next afternoon I still have to leave and keep looking for “gainful employment.”

Week 3 Feb. 2009 – Drippy Driveway

2010-04-02T10:04:00.000-07:00

One morning I went into the car and find ice in my water bottle. It reminds me of the saying that the rich got their ice in the summer but the poor got theirs in the winter. But the reason I was outside way early in the morning is due to, you guess it, my mom. As I walk into the breakfast nook she greets me with: “There’s oil spots all over my driveway.” As this was mom’s day off she had lots of time to mull over this latest catastrophe.

I take my car over to the nearby Car Fix shop and for less than $30 got an oil change. When I got back to mom’s place I had to park out on the street and spend the morning online looking for articles on how to clean up a greasy driveway. Then I was sent to the supermarket to pick up a few varieties of drugs for mom and a bag of cat litter for the drippy driveway. It was one of the things that was supposed to clean up the stained surface and I had to be generous in adding it, according to the experts who had gone through similar situations.

The next afternoon after another 3 hours spent applying for jobs, I return to see my scowling mother. “You don’t drive an old crate…” she pointed out more oil marks with an old plastic laundry scoop full of cat litter.

Again I took the car over to the Car Fix place and a thorough inspection turned up a transmission leak along with a strong recommendation to take it to a Ford dealership.

My contaminated Mustang had been ostracized to the level of street parking. I acquired a note from the USPS indicating I was parked too close to the mailbox. I also got a large note on the windshield about NO OVERNIGHT STREET PARKING!!! The missive was unsigned but my mom knew the culprit was “that dorky Bobby Ray.” This personage was the esteemed president of the Hampton Lake Homeowners Association. According to mom, and later other neighbors I was to meet, he spent much of his time during the warmer months chasing geese and ducks away from the “lake”.

I doled over way too much money to the Ford dealer and had to go for a couple of days without transportation. Eventually the problem was fixed but it had instilled a deep suspicion of watching for oil/transmission fluid leaks on my mom’s once pristine driveway. She dreaded living in a place where the driveway was spotted with car emissions. “You’ve seen those kinds of places, oil stains, cracks, ugly driveways…” I really hadn’t paid much attention to such flawed parking surfaces. A few dots of oil spills on a driveway seemed normal to me.

But the sight of mom standing there looking for stains as she held the kitty litter filled scoop…it made me wonder how home ownership turned into home possession. She was owned by the home, she no longer owned it.