notes of jubilee

How an Unsecured Personal Loan Can Help You

noreply@blogger.com (jubilee) — Tue, 26 Feb 2019 01:48:00 +0000

How an Unsecured Personal Loan Can Help You

It’s very common to find yourself in need of a quick boost of cash. It may be an unexpected repair or medical expense, or to pay for Christmas presents or a vacation. If you need access to cash quickly in there are several reasons that an unsecured personal loan san antonio tx might be right for you.

No credit check

Unlike traditional bank loans, unsecured personal loans do not require a high credit score or even a credit check.

Money is available quickly

Unsecured personal loans provide cash quickly, without having to worry about the pitfalls of collateral and high-interest rates from a payday or title lender's loan or the lag of time during credit checks and approvals from a bank.

Unsecured personal loans can help build credit

If you have poor credit or no credit, an unsecured personal loan can help rebuild or establish your credit rating when you make your scheduled payments on time and in full.

How it works

While a credit check is not necessary, there are some basic requirements to obtain an unsecured personal loan. First, the borrower must be 18 years of age or older, with a valid driver’s license or ID, and social security number. You will also have to have a verifiable residence and income.

From there, it’s simply a matter of filling out the proper paperwork. The lender will then evaluate all the relevant factors (which, again, do NOT include credit history for an unsecured personal loan) and determine how much you are able to borrow.

After you’re approved

Once you’ve been approved for an unsecured personal loan and the lender distributes the funds, you will pay back the loan in equal installments over the course of an agreed-upon term. Like all loans, interest, and principal are included in payments. This type of loan can generally be paid off early with no penalty. After you’ve completed payment, you are free to apply to borrow again in the future.

Joyfully,

noreply@blogger.com (jubilee) — Mon, 18 Feb 2019 21:30:00 +0000

I was over at Omaha Moms Blog last week and wrote a brand spanking new post. I'd love for you to join me over there and let me know what you think!

You can click here to find the post "Living Divorced." It's a rather large topic, so there's much to be said. Fortunately, I have the option to write about what I'm thinking/feeling/stuggling with/triumphing over in more than one post! Could you imagine the length of the post if I had to write everything in one spot? It'd be . . . well . . . a book.

Huh . . . A book . . .

Now there's an idea. ::wink,wink::

Joyfully,

HF 272 and Why It's Terribly Dangerous to Homeschool Families

noreply@blogger.com (jubilee) — Sun, 17 Feb 2019 00:12:00 +0000

I don't usually get into politics here on the ol' blog. But one issue has me a bit fired up. Once again, the government, particularly the Iowa legislature is trying to pass mandates (In the form of HF-272) to get into the business of homeschoolers. You can read an explanatory article by clicking here.

Here are my problems with HF-272.

Home Visits

Basically, the piece of legislation states that four times a year, someone from the state can come in and check on the "well-being" of home schooled children. And they can do so without the consent of the parent, if so ordered.

. . . these home visits “shall take place in the child’s residence with the consent of the parent, guardian, or legal custodian and an interview or observation of the child may be conducted.”
If parents do not provide consent then the school district “the juvenile court or district court upon a showing of probable cause may authorize the person making the home visit to enter the home and interview or observe the child.”

What? Come into my home and observe just because I homeschool? I don't think so. You may wonder why, if I keep everything above board, would I take issue with this. Because this is a slippery slope we are treading.

Who defines "probable cause?"

No one has said. I bet they won't be getting home school families together to help define this. It'll be a group of bureaucrats who think they know how to better raise someone else's child than the parents of that child. Ridiculous. It's the height of arrogance.

Who defines "well being?"

No word on who sets the standards of the definition of "well-being" either. I get it that there are people who mistreat their children and when they must give an explanation as to why their children aren't in school, they claim to homeschool. This is not the norm, of course.

The ignorant want to convince the rest of the population that invading the homes of homeschool families is the only way to prevent these tragedies from happening. It's not. It merely invades the homes of law abiding citizens that have dared to decide to educate their own children. Sorry, but no one knows and loves my child better than I do. No one can make better decisions than I can on what is appropriate to teach my children.

Look at any school and can you honestly tell me that children are better off? There are wonderful teachers and administrators, but not even they can stem the tide that has turned. Often, their hands are tied in crucial situations. Because school is no longer about educating children. School is about feeding children and "keeping them safe." Unfortunately, the schools are feeding them packaged food (sometimes all three meals) and school tragedies (sexual abuse, shootings, drugs, etc) abound.

Mandated Vaccines

The legislation mandates vaccines. Unacceptable. I choose which, if any, vaccines to give my children, not an entity who turns a blind eye to the catastrophic effects that vaccines are causing on a daily basis. Do you know that by age 18, an up to date vaccinated child will have received 72 doses in all? This number includes vaccines that require several doses and boosters and separates the DTaP, MMR and Tdap which are usually given in one syringe, but it's still three dosages, don't forget.

Those professionals who have little patience with parents who dare to be conscientious of their children's exposure, poo-poo this number as being inflated. It is not. They also claim that links to adverse affects is anecdotal at best and fear-mongering at worst. The first attack someone makes when they don't have good evidence is to make the opposition look crazy. They've done a pretty good job, but many parents are catching onto this tactic and looking into the efficacy of modern vaccines.

Who's Gonna Pay?

There is also no word on how this is supposed to be paid for. And yet, the proposed bill wants to include these home visits in the list of duties that already over worked state employees must perform. Or perhaps they will hire a special set of people to get this job done. You can be sure there won't be any homeschool parents on that committee.

I am well aware that the world is going to hell in a hand basket. I usually try to focus on the good. The joy. The only thing I can think of right now is that this world is not my home. It might be terribly, terribly uncomfortable until we get home, but with heaven as our home, He will help us bear it.

Silver lining? We are one day closer to the Rapture. Woot, woot!

Joyfully looking forward to that day,

Let it Be

noreply@blogger.com (jubilee) — Fri, 15 Feb 2019 03:22:00 +0000

I'm a worrier.

Are my kids eating enough vegetables? Getting enough sleep? Did I turn off the kitchen light before I went to bed? Am I ruining my kids' life by going back to work already? Should I limit their screen time even more? Is the Cruise Director getting enough classes in so he'll get into the college he wants? Will the mom-mobile last another winter?

Ugh.

The worrying never ends. Sometimes it even invades my sleep and I dream of stressful situations. I don't know how many times I've reminded myself that worry robs you from joy. Many say worrying is not trusting that the Savior has it all under control. I'm not sure that last one is exactly true, though I get the idea behind it.

Many times I've heard the phrase, "Just let it go!" I even belted out Elsa's theme song as my personal anthem for weeks, hoping that it would happen by osmosis, assimilation or maybe even by coincidence. Something.

It didn't work, by the way.

I'm just a few short years away from 50 (GAH!) and I've never been able to figure out how to 'Let go and Let God." Sure, I pray and tell Him I'm giving my worries over to Him. I've prayed that so often, that I've stopped. Honestly.

Recently, I was chatting with an acquaintance who is also a worrier. She related that her husband has begun to gently remind her to "Let it be."

Oh.

Boy did that strike me. It may be a matter of semantics to some, but for me, it caught my attention in a way that I could finally begin to grasp. Letting a situation "be" reminds me to deliberately take my hands off of a situation. I am not letting the situation slip from my fingers -- I'm making a conscious choice, giving myself permission, if you will, to not take responsibility of what I cannot control. It doesn't exactly absolve me of responsibility of the outcome when I am the one who is responsible, but it reminds me that there are somethings that I don't have control over. And it's those things that I need to, in effect, let go.

I'm not saying that "let it be" is a cure-all. I will need to be reminded often. I'll probably even get annoyed with my IRL people who deem it their responsibility to remind me often.

But it's a start.

Joyfully,

The Art of Gift Giving

noreply@blogger.com (jubilee) — Thu, 14 Feb 2019 03:10:00 +0000

Special occasions come and go. You do your best to leave a lasting impression on your loved ones with the perfect gifts. It can be hard sometimes, especially for the person who has everything. You want every gift to come from the heart and to matter to the person receiving it. This guide will help you master the art of thoughtful gift ideas.

Photo by Christian Lunde on Unsplash

Bags and Totes

Everyone could use an extra bag. In the spring and summer months, totes are especially helpful when it comes to afternoon barbecues, outdoor picnics or days on the beach. Totes are a great practical gift, not to mention a way to accessorize. Find one in a favorite color to match your loved one’s personal style. If someone in your life loves bags and totes, don’t think twice about a gift like that. If they love totes, then odds are they can’t have enough.

Candle Warmers

Photo by Alexandra Fuller on Unsplash

Candle warmers are perfect for every season. Fill them with a variety of different scents to fill your home with warm fragrances. Candle warmers allow you to experience the coziness of a candle without the flame. Unlike those electric or battery powered LED candles, these still emit a warmth and a soft glow wherever you choose to have one. In beautiful designs at Hallmark online, you can choose what makes the best gift.

Framed Art

Photo by Lex Sirikiat on Unsplash

Framed art can come in a variety of styles. From heartwarming pictures to motivational messages, you are able to find something that represents the person. When you give any gift, it’s important to ask a lot of different questions. The more you ask, the more you can narrow what kind of gift would suit them best.

It’s normal for a special occasion to be marked by a gift. Gift giving doesn’t have to be stressful. In fact, it can be a lot of fun when you know what you’re looking for.

Joyfully,

Tips for Preparing Accurate Church Financial Reports

noreply@blogger.com (jubilee) — Thu, 14 Feb 2019 02:40:00 +0000

Many larger churches have their own accountants that they keep on staff. Even if you work at a small church or are just in charge of the reports of your committee or department, you may prepare financial statements for accounting purposes, even if the ultimate responsibility lies with someone else. Here are some goals to aim for in order to create accurate reports.

Timely

Photo by noor Younis on Unsplash

Recording income and expenses as they happen is crucial to making sure your records reflect your true finances. Whether you are preparing individual contribution statements for tax purposes, a statement of financial activities for the year or a statement of financial position at the end of the month, these reports all depend on consistent data entry that happens in a timely manner.

Complete

Photo by Carlos Muza on Unsplash

You can master your church bookkeeping software and be able to answer complicated questions about church taxes. If you don't enter complete data into your program, however, your balance sheet is not going to come out right. In order to make all the numbers match up the way they're supposed to, you have to include every donation, expense, and asset.

Concise

Photo by rawpixel on Unsplash

Church finances can get complicated. If the people reading your report don't understand what they're looking at, it can be especially confusing. Report the information as succinctly as possible so that no one gets bogged down in too many extraneous details. Your report should read simply enough that anyone who pays attention to them can get a clear picture of how the church's finances stand.
It is important that everyone who handles any part of the church finances understands how to report the numbers so that the church's records are correct. By making sure you have all the information you need and reporting it in a timely, concise manner, you can generate accurate reports.

Joyfully,

Tasty Ways to Cool Down a Spicy Burger

noreply@blogger.com (jubilee) — Tue, 12 Feb 2019 13:00:00 +0000

When a burger has spicy ingredients, the bold heat create an intense flavor. The level of heat varies based on the number of peppers or spices that are included in a recipe. Many people eat jalapeno burgers since they can easily adjust the level of heat by adding or removing the peppers. If you want to experience bold heat while eating a spicy hamburger without eliminating the pepper flavor, you'll benefit from including these items with your meal.

Ranch Dressing

Ranch dressing is a delicious product that can enhance a jalapeno burger without overpowering the bold pepper flavor. At most grocery stores, you'll find a variety of ranch dressings with different flavor profiles. Some bottles with feature buttermilk, and others will have bacon bits. No matter what type of dressing you pour on your burger, its dairy components will blend nicely with each jalapeno pepper.

Milk Shake

A milk shake can help you wash down a spicy burger. If you're going to put many jalapeno peppers on a hamburger, this cool, refreshing beverage can calm the heat.

In order to beat the heat quickly, use a straw that bends. Because the end of a straw rests along the bottom of a glass, you'll drink icy cold liquid each time you take a sip.

Yogurt

If you eat a burger with a few jalapenos you can cool down by enjoying an icy dessert after you're done eating the hamburger. Yogurt is an ideal dessert to eat following a spicy burger because the dairy ingredients will reduce the heat from the peppers.

Depending upon your personal experience, hamburgers with peppers might make you sweat as you eat. However, if you consume dairy products during or after the meal, you can calm the heat.

Joyfully,

How to Treat Your Loved One For Their Birthday

noreply@blogger.com (jubilee) — Mon, 11 Feb 2019 13:00:00 +0000

If you have a close friend or a loved one whose birthday is coming up soon, you may already be thinking about how you can treat them for their special day. It can be tough to know what to do for someone for their birthday, especially if the person is very important to you. However, you don't need to spend a fortune or put up with a lot of stress to plan an awesome birthday for someone that you care about. Here are a few ideas to help you to make your loved one's birthday extra special this year.

Photo by Kelsey Chance on Unsplash

First, think about whether you want to take them out for a special meal. This is often the simplest and best way to celebrate a birthday with someone since everyone eats and most people like to eat out with the people that they love and care about. Suggest a fun local eatery that your loved one will be able to enjoy. For example, if you need a cafe Acworth ga look for one like Cookie Galleria, where your loved one can celebrate in style. Think about their tastes and look for a place where you can find something they will truly love.

Photo by Jon Flobrant on Unsplash

If you don't want to just go out to a place to eat, consider trying a more exciting adventure together. For most people, doing something together will be more satisfying and enjoyable than simply receiving another material gift. Think about your loved one's hobbies and try to pick something that they would enjoy. If you don't share their hobbies or if they are not physically fit enough to do something strenuous, you can always go to a movie together. Just spending time with your loved one is important!

Finally, make sure that you tell your loved one how you feel about them on their birthday. You can write it on a birthday card if it makes it easier. The important thing is that you give them a heartfelt message of love and appreciation.

Joyfully,

It's All In The Choosing - Phrase for the Year

noreply@blogger.com (jubilee) — Wed, 06 Feb 2019 05:23:00 +0000

I am long past feeling guilty over not making resolutions as in the typical January routine of making and breaking promises to yourself.

What I am not so successful in is pushing past that niggling feeling in the back of my brain that occurs when someone enthusiastically announces their word or phrase for the year.

It happens all over FaceBook and various blogs. I've always viewed it as another form of resolution. And I've never had luck or will power or whathaveyou with resolutions. Perhaps because the perfectionist in me gets overwhelmed with the magnitude of my resolutions and it all comes crashing down before I even begin. I also tend to feel boxed in to one. more. thing. I. must. accomplish.

Ugh.

Though I wasn't looking for a word or phrase in which to apply as a framework for my year, Jenny, from Jenny On the Spot, DID choose one. Her subsequent blog post had me thinking about this topic a bit more than normal. You can read her post by clicking here.

About the same time, read a meme online that talked about life being hard. Real hard. Life is hard when we know we have to make a change. Life can also be hard when we stay the same. Most of the time, I am pretty comfortable staying in my zone, no sudden lane changes, no big life decisions, etc. Adrenaline tends to not be my friend. I'm just sayin'.

And then about a year ago, I began thinking (again, more seriously this time) about some lifestyle changes that I need to make. I fretted. I ignored. I planned. I put it all on the back burner. And then I decided to go for it, knowing that it will be one of the most physically and emotionally demanding courses I will ever undertake.

The details aren't important for this particular post. Suffice it to say: I can let myself stay stuck and life can continue to be hard. Or I can make some hard changes, but move forward and come out better for it on the other side. I had to choose my hard.

Staying the same: SUPER HARD

Making changes: SUPER HARD, BUT BETTER IN THE LONG RUN.

I usually shy away from the difficult things. It takes a long time for me to get to the point where I'm ready to make a change. I'm not a risk taker. I am honest enough to say that I'm insecure when it comes to making decisions of a BIG nature.

Last July, I chose my hard. And staying the same was not the option I chose. The last six months have been full of preparation. The next six months, in order to see that decision through, will be the most difficult part. And the changes have long lasting repercussions. Mostly good, but repercussions just the same.

I think I will create a great big poster that says: CHOOSE YOUR HARD. I need to hang in where I can see it every morning.

The phrase sounds funny, I know. But if I am to see this through properly, it's a choice I am going to have to make over and over again. Maybe COMMIT TO YOUR HARD is a better way to explain it at this point, but I like the other phrasing better. More succinct.

There you have it. It's not very spiritual, that's for sure, but I do feel like this may jump start other areas in which I need to grow. Maybe.

Let's not get too crazy right outta the gate, tho. ;)

Joyfully,

On Being Divorced - The Thing About Anger

noreply@blogger.com (jubilee) — Wed, 30 Jan 2019 23:05:00 +0000

(You can find more thoughts and tips On Being Divorced, by clicking on the link to the right of the page. Thanks!)

Photo by Gabriel Matula on Unsplash

Sometimes I get angry.

I wonder if by nearly always taking the high road when going through my divorce proceedings, I shortchanged myself. I did try to respond calmly, with forethought and without animosity. Still do. Not easy for a naturally reactionary person such as myself. I hope I've grown in this area.

I had a couple people I could voice my deepest, most ugly outrage to at the time. Yet, I still edited my speech and emotions as I went along. Because who wants to be ugly? I didn't. I may have even pushed the "high road" envelope a bit because then it was perfectly acceptable to feel righteous in my "rightness." Gah. That's ugly enough right there.

Anyway, I'm not advocating not taking the high road. I think I am advocating the feeling all the feels route. Perhaps even saying all the ugly words to someone who will love you anyway. Or you may get stuck.

I feel stuck

I feel stuck in a perpetual merry-go-round of resentment. I can't seem to shake it. I've given my anger over to God countless times. The fact that I have to keep on doing it frustrates me even.

Maybe I've regressed back to the anger stage. Not over the divorce itself, at least, I can't see where I am still angry over the details of the divorce (God has graciously erased many of the details from my mind, but I do remember being perpetually piqued. Maybe one day I will have to remember those and deal with them or maybe it's a gift He's given for eternity).

But I am angry over the continued ripple effects that my divorce has caused. Same old patterns of behavior from my former spouse has remained a constant and that makes me angry. New frustrations with him have arisen and that makes me angry. I often ask myself, "Hasn't he learned ANYTHING?" Surely, he's matured and learned lessons from our divorce. I just can't see it from where I am standing four states away.

On the other hand

I do remember being frustrated with him quite often when we were married. There were so many things that I didn't understand about him or the choices he made. His timing was never my timing when it came to projects and making large purchases. He remained silent so often when a few words would have solved so much.

So, maybe he's the same guy I married, it's just more frustrating because now, I don't get the benefit or the chance of consideration when issues arise. When we were married, there was at least a chance of that happening.

Recently, I felt as though we were making great strides in co-parenting. Even though his normal MO is to be all talk and no action. Now that weighty issues have arisen with one of our children, he's MIA. Silent. Absent. No surprise.

Once again, I have to come to terms with his dropping in and out of the parenting circumstances as if that is an option. If he was willing to walk away from a 15 year marriage and three amazingly beautiful and talented kids in the first place . . . Why should I expect better of him now?

So, yeah. I'm angry

Angry that I fell for his "promises, but no delivery" routine. Again. Angry that I allowed the optimist in me hope for better from him. Again. Those couple of good moments that he was finally going to step up and parent, I let myself believe him. Again. But mostly, I'm angry that he's letting our children down, over and over. Again.

This is the part where I'm supposed to find the joy . . . The "But then, God" part of the post that wraps it all up and encourages. All I've got is a bunch of trite, pat, Sunday School answers that even I can't swallow. None of it seems authentic.

Maybe I need more time to process and feel before I commit to a silver lining. Maybe I need to pray more. Or read my Bible more. Maybe there's something to the fake it 'til you make it technique: Keep on smiling until you actually feel like smiling.

Maybe I'll try that tomorrow. I know God will forgive my delay. Maybe I can eventually forgive myself too.

The Longing - It's A Thing

noreply@blogger.com (jubilee) — Mon, 28 Jan 2019 18:53:00 +0000

(You can find more thoughts and tips On Being Divorced, by clicking on the link to the right of the page. Thanks!)
****

When I began blogging eleven years ago, I had no idea what the future would hold. Obviously, none of us do, but we still hope, pray and plan for our specific ideal. I knew that The Calm One and I would be married and serving the Lord with three children here on earth and two in heaven. Because that was what life looked like then.

Sometimes even the surest of things change. And change they did, six years ago. If you've kept up with my intermittent posting between sponsored posts, you know I've been divorced. They are six of the longest, yet very short stack of years I've ever lived through.

I think I've been fairly successful in not letting my marriage status define me. I sometimes forget that someone divorced me, but I never, ever forget that I am not married and do not have someone to share life with. To parent with. To lay in bed with fingers intertwined and laugh at inside jokes. The dream was snatched from me by two people who put their desires above the good of everyone else involved.

And there were many involved. Our children, of course. Our parents, siblings, extended family members and friends were all suddenly thrown for a loop. All of us had to maneuver through this new, unfamiliar territory.

Don't we all crave someone? Someone that will be a witness to our life? Someone to bathe our gaping wounds with their tears of compassion? Those wide, open chasms of hurt to be filled in with sweet words? Someone we can do the same for?

I realize that's a fairly romanticized view of marriage. I'm not naive enough to believe everyday of marriage could be described that way. In fact, I know those days are few and far between because life gets busy. Kids need raising. Jobs need to be completed.

But on the days that are just too much, and though your head knows God is near and in control, a person sometimes needs arms around them. To hear that it's going to be all right and you'll get through it together.

Should I ever get to experience these things again, I will never take it for granted.

Joyfully,

Choosing A Private School

noreply@blogger.com (jubilee) — Sat, 12 Jan 2019 19:41:00 +0000

Photo by pan xiaozhen on Unsplash

There are many factors that go into choosing a good school for your child. If you have decided that you think private school is going to be the better option for your son or daughter, you probably have your reasons for making that decision. Although the idea of sending your son or daughter to private school might seem like a good one, you might still be looking for advice. Helpful tips have been listed below to help you with sending your child to private school.

Know That Not All Private Schools are Created Equally

You might be under the impression that all private schools are better than all public schools. It's accurate that many parents prefer private schools in general over public schools when it comes to their children's education, but not all private schools are created equally. To help ensure that your son or daughter gets the best private school education Tampa Florida, make sure that you look at different private schools before choosing one. This will help your family choose the private school that will provide your child with the best educational opportunities.

Don't Be Afraid to Talk About Money

Some people think that the parents and staff at private schools are all stuffy and snobby. However, if your family is concerned about the cost of sending your child to private school, you should know that you aren't the only ones. This is a common concern, so it's nothing to be embarrassed about. If you want to ask about financial aid options or about tuition prices, you should do so. Asking questions and looking for help early can help you make private school a reality for your child while avoiding putting too much of a burden on your family's finances.

Take Full Advantage of What the School Has to Offer

Many private schools have a lot to offer their students, such as extracurricular activities or extra help for students who are struggling with their course work. To make sure your child is taking full advantage of what the school has to offer, make sure that you're aware of the opportunities that are available for your son or daughter and make sure that your family makes use of them.

Sending your child to private school has its advantages, but it can be overwhelming for a lot of families. The advice above should be helpful, though.

More Help In The Classroom

noreply@blogger.com (jubilee) — Fri, 11 Jan 2019 19:24:00 +0000

Photo by Tim Mossholder on Unsplash

Although a public school can offer the education that your children need, there are benefits of attending a private school as well. You might think that a private school is expensive, but there are some that don't require tuition or that have scholarships for those who want to attend. Before you make the decision to enroll your children in private school, weigh the positives and negatives so that you make the best decision for your family.

One benefit about private schools in Redmond WA is that there are smaller class sizes. This means that it will likely be easier for your children to meet new people and to get help from the teachers when it's needed. Since there are smaller class sizes, the teachers can usually focus more on the lessons and educational activities in the classroom.

Photo by Jeremy Bishop
on Unsplash

Many private schools are smaller than a public school. They don't have as many classrooms or buildings overall on the property. This can provide a safer environment for students. There are usually more adults on the campus of a private school, which means that issues can be resolved quickly. There is often more involvement from the parents at a private school. The teachers want parents to interact in the classroom and at special functions. Schools try to make students and parents feel like they are part of a solution instead of like they are part of any other ordinary school. They want to make the school feel like it's a community.

Tuition that is collected at private schools is often used to purchase enrichment activities and to promote more classes and resources that benefit the students. There is assistance available to help students succeed so that they can be prepared for high school and college courses. Teachers work with the students to help them discover what they are good at and the careers that they might be successful in after they graduate.

Joyfully,

Sunday Soul Stirrings - Finding Joy Despite Holiday Disappointments

noreply@blogger.com (jubilee) — Mon, 31 Dec 2018 04:43:00 +0000

(For more thoughts and tips on how to navigate through divorce, please click here for a complete list of posts.)

This year my children were supposed to spend Christmas with their father. They didn't. They took the devastating news like champs. My children have become rather stoic about so many things and the circumstances surrounding not getting to be with their dad during his visitation is one of them.

As I listened to the speaker call with their dad from the doorway, trying to not be intrusive, and yet wanting them to know I was near, I felt well-springs of emotions. All kinds of emotions. Hurt for them, but happiness that I would get to be with them. Aggravation over the circumstances which prevented their visit with him, but elation that I'd get to see the delight in their eyes when they opened gifts from me and my parents and various other relatives on Christmas morning rather than two weeks later or two weeks before Christmas.

I also felt a tremendous load of responsibility. Responsibility to make up for their missed opportunity in not getting to spend time with their dad. I struggled with just how much time and energy do I put out trying to make their visitation with their father a reality, since he wasn't doing the same himself? Is that something I must do?

My immediate reaction was to plan the heck out of the last couple of weeks of November and the entire month of December. We'd do tons of stuff that we wouldn't normally do. They'd be so busy that they would forget their heartbreak.

And then I remembered

I'm an extreme introvert. So climbing out of my comfort zone, even for those I love, is stressful for me. Even when I WANT to step outside my comfort zone. My body no longer reacts normally to stress of any kind, even the good, exciting kinds of things become stressful in negative ways. But I determined to push past obstacles, plan and be present for my children.

I had to be careful not to set a precedent that I couldn't duplicate in the future. Money is always an issue for single parents. For married parents too, of course, but especially single parents. While I chose to spend a bit of extra money on activities we might not normally participate in (all day laser tag anyone?), I don't know if in the future I'd be able to spend the money. Financial situations can change at a moment's notice. I always have to be mindful of that. I didn't want to create unrealistic expectations in my children and then have them disappointed in me for not duplicating that in the future.

I don't want to short change my children's grieving process. There is true, honest to goodness grief that my kids stare down when they don't get their holiday with their dad. While I want to cushion the blow best I can, it would be irresponsible to completely take away the opportunity for them to develop healthy coping mechanisms for themselves. My job is not to shield them from disappointments and challenges, rather to guide them to healthy ways to deal.

It's not my responsibility to make up for any real or imagined lack on their father's part. Perhaps one day, I will change my mind: for now, in the tenuous relationship of co-parenting, I don't feel I should bend over backward to make visitations with their father a reality when he does not. So, for now, I am sticking to our divorce decree (that we both agreed upon) pretty much to the letter. Had circumstances been beyond his control, this would be an entirely different post.

Finding the Joy

So, what did I do, you may ask, dear reader. I planned several big outings and several more smaller activities as I knew I could handle them. I made sure they were surrounded by friends and family often. That we remained faithful to our routines, especially going to church to hear The Word. I conferred with a trusted friend so often that she probably got tired of me. I called my parents. A lot.

And I prayed. Still do. Pray I handled the situation with wisdom and grace. Pray that through our faith in Christ my children experience the balm of healing. Pray that my children forget not getting to go to their dad's. And pray that they remember the laughter, the singing, the game nights, pizza and movie afternoons, and all the really REALLY bad puns we came up with along the way.

Joyfully,

Join Me! OMB December Post

noreply@blogger.com (jubilee) — Sun, 16 Dec 2018 20:52:00 +0000

I'm over at Omaha Moms Blog today talking about a few tips on how to help stave off loneliness over the holidays! Please join us. Here is a quick peek:

"Feel all the feels. Empty an entire box of tissues, if you need to. Listen to all the sad songs on Pandora. And then determine to do. Being active, constructive, and giving of yourself. The good news is that it gets easier. The holiday after you use up the whole tissue box, you might find you only need half a box of tissues. Progress, no matter how little, is still progress. Cut yourself some slack."

After reading, you can hop back over here and comment on ways you avoid loneliness regardless of your marital status and the time of year. We'd love to hear from you!

Joyfully,

OMB Blog post -- Join Me!

noreply@blogger.com (jubilee) — Sun, 02 Dec 2018 21:21:00 +0000

Need something fun and different to do this holiday season? Try (or just learn about) some of these Christmas traditions from around the world and right here in your own backyard. Click here to read more!

Here's a sneak peek:

"There is a village in Peru that encourages its people to settle all conflicts by fist fighting on Christmas Eve. Have a grudge from earlier in the year that didn’t get resolved to your satisfaction? Well, then, take it to the streets. Once the fighting is over, everyone starts with a clean slate for the next year. While this may be tempting for some in your family, allowing this tradition may make for some awkward Christmas photos!"

Pop back over here to leave your comments on your wacky traditions!

Joyfully,

Moving Forward After Divorce

noreply@blogger.com (jubilee) — Mon, 26 Nov 2018 03:37:00 +0000

(Interested in more thoughts On Being Divorced? Click here to view the series.)

Moving forward after tragedy is difficult. Recovering from divorce and battling loneliness is no different. Here are a few ideas I've tried and gleaned from others.

Be flexible and above all patient – with yourself, (yes, even with your former spouse), with your children, friends and extended family members. You are all learning how to navigate this new way of living. None of you are going to do this perfectly. It takes time and repetition to get right the intricacies of living divorced. Grief isn’t suddenly “gotten over” and we all take our own time and way to heal. There's no magic formula or one-size-fits-all.

Friends who've not experienced divorce or a great loss may not understand how best to help. It's necessary sometimes to let them know what you need. Children of divorce are hurting and may not recognize your grief. It's fine to give them the bottom line, without going into detail, of why you need what you need. Be upfront about your expectations of them and let them off the hook for things that they may feel is their responsibility, but isn't. I have a child who sometimes takes on my emotions and tries to do what he can to shield me. He's a teenager. That's not his job and shouldn't be his worry. We've had several conversations regarding this because it's easy for him to forget he's allowed to be a child, growing into a man and not expected to be full-grown at his age.

Reprioritize and Simplify – Purging your living space can be cathartic. Already a neat freak? Purging someone else’s living space can be cathartic too. Living in a clutter free environment, calms the mind and spirit. It's a two-part gift to yourself. There are many books and articles on the best way to do this. Try this chart from PopSugar or this set of ideas from Love and Marriage.

Journal – we’ve heard this a gazillion times, but have we really done it? I kept a list that I made (right after my former husband left) of all my blessings. I’ve gone back and read it several times. Each time I’m astonished at how I could find so many blessings during such heartbreak. With nothing as devastating as my divorce, surely, I could find even more blessings now. It’s healthy and productive to revisit gratitude lists and make new ones.

Remember life is about relationships -- Consider becoming a pet owner. Unconditional love from a dog or a cat gives you something to focus upon other than yourself. Renew old acquaintances. Get caught up with that friend from seventh grade history class that you used to cut up with in the back row. Facebook makes that easy. Invest in your children's hobbies and interests. The bonding that can take place over a plate of cookies that turned out terribly is never a waste.

Don't postpone joy – Cross off an item or two on your bucket list. Take that cruise with the girls. Visit Paris with a family member and try every wine and cheese combinations possible. Need something a little closer to home like I do? I’ve always wanted to learn Italian. It wouldn’t take much to sign up for a college class. One step closer to meeting that hot Italian actor, right?

A-hem.

Switch things up -- Who says Christmas or New Year’s must be celebrated the same way in the same place as usual? Rent a cabin and head for the mountains for Christmas. Instead of watching the ball drop on tv, watch it in person and have a rockin’ New Year’s Eve.

One year, as a newly divorced woman, I celebrated Thanksgiving with family members at a local, somewhat fancy restaurant. The food was good, but we had chosen a family style restaurant. Not a problem until we realized we’d be sharing a table with strangers and their family as well. Not quite what we had in mind. My family agreed, our usual tradition around my parents’ table was what we missed the most that year. Sometimes it takes a change in environment to make us appreciate our traditions. Lesson learned.

Focus on others -- Volunteer at a hospital, assisted living building or animal shelter. Maybe you are like I am and putting yourself “out there” is way out of your comfort zone. There are behind the scenes ways to volunteer too. Deliver meals, leave a washer’s worth of quarters to pay for someone else’s load, ring a bell for The Salvation Army, stock shelves for a food pantry, or really go behind the scenes and help out backstage at a Christmas play.

Invest in your faith – This seems like it should be a no-brainer. In the midst of the most heart-wrenching devastation, it’s easy to turn to our faith. Once things settle a bit and we feel like we are doing okay, our faith is the easiest thing to let slide. Yet, it’s the most important thing. We cannot continue to be faithful in honoring the Lord, if we aren’t faithful in maintaining our relationship with Him.

If nothing else, do the last suggestion. It truly is an investment for eternity. As a beloved family member reminds me often: It's either about Jesus, or it isn't.

Let's make it about Jesus, above all.

Joyfully,

Back Seat Storage for Your Pickup

noreply@blogger.com (jubilee) — Sat, 10 Nov 2018 22:35:00 +0000

4 Reasons You Need Secure Back Seat Storage for Your Pickup

Keeping items loose in your truck or trying to pile items in tubs can make the interior space seem cluttered and messy. Below are foViewur great reasons to invest in back seat storage for trucks.

Keep Important Tools Handy

Important tools like basic wrenches, liers, wire cutters, and hammer can all be at an easy access point by installing back seat storage for trucks. It works perfectly for full size and cab and a half models.You can choose from metal or wood styles.

Keep Items From Rolling Around Loose

The motion of any moving vehicle can make items that are loose go anywhere and everywhere when placed at floor level. You can find yourself tripping on tools or have them flying like missiles when you hit the brakes. Keep all of your loose items tucked safely in a secure storage bin designed for truck interiors.

Avoid Losing Items Out of an Open Door

Carrying items loose is one way to lose them permanently by having them drop out of the truck when stopped at a location. The loss is permanent if you don't hear the items fall to the ground. Keep them stowed safely in roomy back seat storage for trucks.

Securely Anchor Box to Back of Interior Wall

Each interior storage box is provided with the holes and hardware needed to secure it to the back wall of the truck. It will be handy to reach, yet safely out of the way. You never have to worry about the weather accessing your items like a bed storage box. You can stow everything from metal tools to sensitive paperwork.
You can add extra storage to the interior of your truck in painted wood, natural wood, or aluminum diamond plate design. All are designed to stow tons of important stuff with little effort.

Resource Ideas for Entrepreneurs

noreply@blogger.com (jubilee) — Tue, 06 Nov 2018 01:43:00 +0000

There are many different ways to work in our society, be it an onsite, 9 to 5 position or something more freelance or “for hire.” There’s absolutely something to be said though for a person who revs up their entrepreneurial spirit and creates a business of their own. Many people do very well these days by creating their own product line and selling it over the Internet. This type of product can range from art pieces sold over Etsy to a piece of creative writing, like a novel or book of poetry. Any of these things can be created and then sold online, and many people today are doing well with making an income this way.

Using Outside Resources

Today there are numerous online resources that can be used to help get a creative business going. Websites can be created as a sales center for a business, and social media sites like Facebook and Instagram can be used for interactive marketing. Youtube is another place that can be used to advertise a product for minimal costs.

Many business owners also use places like mailbox centers to handle some of the business tasks they need to deal with. These centers can provide services like document duplication, P.O. boxes and even a notary public in nyc. These business centers also can offer product fulfillment services. These services include taking product orders over email and then packing and shipping out the products to customers. The products can also be stored in a mailbox center warehouse, which frees up a lot of space in a business owner’s establishment. This is a big job that can be very time consuming for an entrepreneur, so having outside help that’s affordable for this service is hugely helpful.

No, running your own independent business isn’t simple but done well it can be a very gratifying way to work and make a solid income.

Football for the Father? Why Not!

noreply@blogger.com (jubilee) — Mon, 29 Oct 2018 12:00:00 +0000

"And whatsoever you do in word or deed, so all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God and the Father by him." Col 3:17

My oldest, The Cruise Director is nearing his majority and a senior in high school. That brings up a wide range of wacky, normal, and confusing emotions. And that's just on my part. Oh, boy, on his part . . . Well let's just say that there were many late night talks and venting sessions happening around here.

He played his first and only football season this year. It was challenging physically and mentally. I am so very proud of him and how he rose to the occasion each time there was a game or tough practice. I may or may not have had to use the tough love approach once or twice. In fact, when he wanted to be negative after one particular practice, I gave him a speech that he laughed at, but later admitted was effective. I may have channeled my inner Coach Chandler . . . I'm just sayin'

"I don't care if they put you on THIRD string or FOURTH string! You're gonna go out there and work hard. As hard as you possibly can. You can and will work your tail off as if you are fighting for a position on first string. Because at any time, they can change their minds and put you on first string! Do you hear me? And when they are down a man and they call you onto the field, you will be ready. Ready to show them that at any time you can jump in and kick booty in whatever spot you are needed. You are gonna go out there and make them sorry they put you on the bench and not the field! They're gonna scratch their heads and wonder why they didn't play you sooner and more often. You hear me? And if nothing else comes out of this, you will have the pride of knowing that you gave it all you got. You laid it all out on the field. And you did it, not for the coaches, not for me, but for yourself and more importantly -- The Lord!"

I'm sure the term "booty," would have been used in a completely different way in Friday Night Lights. And perhaps it wasn't entirely appropriate the mention in the same conversation as the Creator of the Universe, but you get the idea.

Whether that pep talk was as effective as I imagine it was or not, things turned around for him and played more than we expected for a first time player. He still had tough practices. Still had achy muscles and a weariness that only 10 hours of solid sleep could cure, but by golly, the kid had a great first and only season.

Sometimes all it takes is someone to believe in you. Someone to give you a bit of a push. A bit of a boost of confidence.

And maybe a melodramatic speech for good measure.

"And whatsoever you do in word or deed, so all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God and the Father by him." Col 3:17

Joyfully,

NYC - A trip for entertainment seekers

noreply@blogger.com (jubilee) — Sun, 21 Oct 2018 19:29:00 +0000

For people who love to enjoy live entertainment of the highest quality while also taking in a wealth of amazing cultural attractions, there’s just one city that really has it all: New York. New York City is a place of amazing excitement and legendary events. As the saying goes, “If I can make it there, I’ll make it anywhere,” and that saying continues to be true today. The world’s most talented writers and performers head to New York because of its amazing energy and because of the incredible opportunities this city provides.

An Actor’s Paradise

Actors from all over the United States have long seen New York as a beacon. This is the place to head to if you want to be a star on the Broadway stage. Great stars like Bette Midler and Barbra Streisand got started here, and they rose to the top and stayed there. The great performances that are available here on Broadway, off-broadway and in the Cabaret clubs are a big attraction for visitors, and it all adds up to a lot of excitement for those who love to see great entertainers, live.

Anyone who is planning a trip to New York should take a look at the nyc play reviews in advance, so they can plan on what shows to see. This is the best way to get the best seats and the best deals on tickets, so waiting till the last minute is not advised. Along with seeing a great show, there are also incredible dining options available in the city, so it’s smart to check out the restaurant scene near the theaters, so a whole evening can be planned.

No question about it, New York is truly one of the greatest cities on earth. This town offers art, music, and cultural attractions that are second to none. So, if you’re planning a trip soon, be sure to make New York your first choice.

Cultivating Security for Seniors

noreply@blogger.com (jubilee) — Sun, 21 Oct 2018 19:19:00 +0000

Watching a close friend, parent or another loved one grow old can be incredibly difficult, but creating a secure environment for those individuals can make the aging process somewhat easier for older people and the individuals who love them. Whether seniors are still on their own or live with someone else, there are several ways to ease the transition from adulthood to seniorhood.

Caring for a Live-In Senior

While starting a conversation about having a senior move in with a loved one is not easy, it comes up frequently for the grown children older adults. Although this situation may require a number of adjustments by everyone involved, there are several necessary steps that family members can take to foster the loving, safe atmosphere that those seniors require.
Removing throw rugs or other trip hazards and installing bars in the shower and near the toilet are a couple of ways to increase the physical safety of a senior in the home, but it is also important to address the emotional needs created by drastic changes in a loved one's lifestyle. The loss of independeence is a profound emotional injury that forces coherent seniors to confront their own mortality.

Supporting Seniors in Their Own Homes

Not every senior in need of a little extra help with medical issues or around the house will need to abandon independence and move in with a family member. In fact, many older adults simply need a family member to stop by once or twice a week to offer assistance. If a loved one is not closeby, hiring a professional to provide elder care assistance may be an option.

Making the Tough Decisions

Regardless of what type of issues seniors face, allowing them to participate in the decisions that will directly affect their independence is vital. In short, applying the Golden Rule, which suggests that everyone should treat others in the way that they would want to be treated, will ease the transition of aging for everyone involved.

Tips For Moving With Children

noreply@blogger.com (jubilee) — Wed, 19 Sep 2018 02:19:00 +0000

Moving to a new home is never easy when you have children. They are anxious about their new surroundings, but they are also excited to help with the process. The following tips can help keep your children busy while making the move an easier experience for everyone.

Discuss The Move

You want to discuss the move with your children early to give them time to adjust to this change. Get them excited about decorating their new room and making new friends, but be sure to address any questions or concerns they may have about the move.

Give Them A Job

Children who are excited about the move want to help with the process. You can give younger children a job such as packing their stuffed animals or extra linen. Older children can help pack, seal and label the boxes, or they can keep an eye on the dog as you pack.

Pack A Special Box

Give your child a special box for packing their favorite things, such as their teddy bear, action figure or book. You can even let them decorate the box with crayons and stickers. Let your child take their special box in the car so they have it during the move.

Keep Them Occupied

A tablet with their favorite movie is sure to keep your child occupied for a few hours. If you would rather give them a hands-on project, ask them to draw a map of their new room. They can use crayons, stickers and snapshots to create their map on construction paper.

Hire Professional Movers

It is okay to enlist in help so you can spend more time with your child during the process. You can hire professional movers Morris County NJ to help you pack, load and unload your items. Your movers can even help you disassemble and assemble your furniture.

The moving process can be exciting and stressful for your children, so you want to go into the move with a cool head. You can get your children through the move by talking to them, keeping them occupied and hiring professional movers.

Choosing a Great Seafood Restaurant

noreply@blogger.com (jubilee) — Tue, 18 Sep 2018 02:18:00 +0000

How Do You Choose a Great Seafood Restaurant?

Going to a seafood restaurant can be a bit more perilous than going to any other kind of restaurant. Thankfully, there are ways to ensure that you're choosing a high-quality establishment for your evening out. Here are just a few tips for finding and selecting a good seafood joint.

Look At Dishes, Not Restaurants

Let's say that you have an all-consuming love of shrimp. Rather than looking for a good seafood restaurant that just so happens to serve it, look for a place that's famous for its shrimp dishes. Not only will you get to enjoy your favorite dish, but restaurants that specialize in certain meals tend to have higher-quality food overall. The attention that they pay to their menu is reflected in everything else about the business, too.

Ask About Freshness

Fresh seafood is always better than something that's been packed on ice for a long time. However, restaurants can be dishonest when it comes to the shelf life of their salmon and trout. Don't be afraid to call them up and ask pointed questions about the freshness of their seafood. What body of water does it come from, and when is it delivered to the restaurant? How long do they keep it? How do they preserve it? If they can't answer, they aren't worth your time.

Read Customer Reviews

This is the most obvious way to determine the value and quality of a restaurant, but don't blindly believe everything that you read. Look at the reviews and ask yourself if they seem genuine. Does that complaining customer have a bone to pick with the business owner? Does that praise-filled review seem manufactured? Pay attention to the little details. They can help you determine truthfulness and trustworthiness.

These are just a few things to keep in mind as you search for the best seafood Plano TX. While everyone will have different opinions on things like spices and garnishes, you can't disagree on the quality of fresh versus non-fresh seafood. Use these tips to make sure that you always enjoy the former.

Things. They Are A Changin'.

noreply@blogger.com (jubilee) — Mon, 06 Aug 2018 22:39:00 +0000

I was talking with a friend and we were commiserating over the difficulty in finding time to write. I talked specifically about this blog while she mentioned writing in general. I related that it seems easier to write for Omaha Moms Blog where I have a deadline and certain expectations. With my personal blog, I get to make up the rules and can be as relax or as strict as I desire. It's also a bit more difficult to write about my children, which were the catalyst for the blog.

In this time of life, where my children are teens and ever aware of being written about, it's tough to put on paper the "normal" anecdotal types of posts like when they were little. And, to be honest, there are fewer types of those kinds of things happening because their everyday struggles and triumphs are more grown up in nature. I sure don't want to have them feel like their lives are on display or only good for blog fodder. So, to maintain the bond of trust, I write less and less about them. In fact, I can't remember the last time I wrote about them on this blog. It's a little sad. But only in the same way that they are growing up in general and not little kids anymore kind of sad.

They are so fun. Funny. Talented. Caring. Thoughtful. I want to preserve their desire to remain somewhat anonymous as they navigate the beginning years of their adulthood. While it seems a bit silly to be too overly cautious when I see some of the things they are willing to post on social media about themselves . . . still it's their choice, not mine when it comes right down to it. All this to say, the blog has been changing in nature for quite some time. And while it's hard for me personally to come to terms with that, it's necessary.

I still plan on doing reviews, including some sponsored material, sharing my stories of writing fiction and personal victories and struggles. I hope you will continue to join me, if for no other reason than to be reminded that we're all in this together, God is in control and we are loved with an Everlasting Love.

Joyfully,