This month’s post is about an event coming soon to Lexington – Kentucky Crafted: The Market.

It was a card (umm, obviously). A sorority sister (and my freshman dorm across-the-hall neighbor) requested my address on Facebook earlier this week. I’d been halfway expecting something from her.

I opened it and another little flyer-type of card fell out.

Now, I should be honest here and say that when I saw the front of the card emblazoned with a big ol’ cross, I felt a little bit of dread. I was worried that my friend had joined a new church and was doing some sort of outreach ministry in which inviting known heathens to come worship was part of the deal. Ok, so that wouldn’t have been so bad. I could have just ignored it, but I’d been hoping for something more fun.

Then, I read her card and was awed and amazed at how awesome she is. Here is the text:

Lydia, I have donated 2 nights of shelter in your name. I am doing this because I’m really tired of all of the negativity in the world. Everywhere you turn people are fighting over politics, religion, birth control, immigration, the economy and on and on. People behave in rude and disrespectful manners towards one another.

Since I cannot force anyone else to change, I’m going to focus on trying to become a more positive force in this world. I’ve chosen 10 women (because we get shit done) to receive these cards.

This is a “pay it forward” kind of deal. All I ask is that you do something nice and unexpected for someone else. I know I’m preaching to the choir, but I think you will actually participate in this.

Apparently, Becky has a lot of faith in me? How can I let her down after something as awesome as that?

If you’re interested, The Community Inn is operated by the Catholic Action Center in Lexington, Kentucky. It shelters women and men who have no home and “is part of an all-volunteer effort to provide shelter, food, clothing, laundry service and a hand up with dignity to our brothers and sisters in need.” I think that’s a wonderful mission.

You hear the Gandhi quote, “Be the change you wish to see in the world” so much these days that it has almost become cliché. However, I believe it can really make a difference if each person does one small thing to be that change. My friend, Becky, has done her thing.

I wasn’t planning to observe any sort of Lenten practice this year. This note, delivered just as Lent is beginning, seems like a good impetus to do something and to make that something meaningful. I’m not sure what that something will be, but I’m going to participate. Who knows. You might get a card in the mail from me!

Related articles

• Lent Calendar for 2012 (chenaustralia.com)

While I was gone for a run on Saturday morning (seven miles, woot!), The Husband cut down our dead old dogwood tree. That afternoon, we hauled it away to a friend’s massive bonfire pile. It is great having a friend who is happy to accept your tree trimmings and old dead tree refuse. Our city would put it to good use as mulch for public spaces, but it’s nice to not have to stack it and tie it up into uniform bundles. This way, we just throw it in the back of my dad’s truck (it’s also nice to have a dad with a truck) and toss it on the bonfire pile.

Today, I worked to turn the space into a usable garden area. I bought black plastic sheeting at the big box home store. I laid it out, working it underneath our sad and awful-looking picket fence. I weighed it down with loose bricks, a couple of scrap wood pieces and lots of random heavy stuff I could find. The hope is that, over the next three weeks, this plastic sheeting will smother all the existing grass and weeds. You can learn more about this process at this link.

Please overlook the dilapidated state of that picket fence and the general nastiness of the porch. I’m hoping that working in the garden will prompt me to spend more time fixing up the rest of the area just so I don’t have to look at it. Right now, I almost never am around this part of the house.

Eventually, that space will be occupied by some raised plant beds and lots of nutritious vegetables. In the meantime, though, those vegetables have to start somewhere. I plan to buy some seedlings for transplants, but I also want to try my hand at growing my own seedlings.

I found an amazing resource (PDF link) for planning, growing and harvesting my home vegetable garden. It’s customized for my state and growing zone, which really helps me figure out what’s what. This resource is from my state’s Cooperative Extension Service – check out your area’s similar service. The document has lots of useful tables and lists. One I’ve found myself going back to is a gardener’s calendar. It lists the dates that the home gardener should use to plant seeds indoors, when to transplant the seedlings into the garden, and when the weather is right to sow seeds directly outdoors.

With that information in mind, today, I started some new seeds. I planted Valencia Onions , Emerald Oak Oakleaf Lettuce and DeCicco Broccoli (all from organic seeds).

I used Burpee Seed Starting 3″ Square Peat Pots and Burpee Organic Seed Starting Soil. Once the seedlings are ready for transplanting, I can just place the pots and all in the garden – no need to cut away the container which lessens transplant shock. Honestly, I need all the help I can get!

In order to aid germination, I covered the planted pots with plastic to hold in the moisture and warmth. With any luck, we’ll see some seedlings soon! The broccoli should germinate within 3-8 days, the onion in 4-13 and the lettuce in 5-10.

While I’m waiting for all the magic to happen, I’ve broken out the handy-dandy graph paper and working on planning out the placement of vegetables in my garden. Additionally, I’m trying to plan out a planting and harvesting calendar so I can maximize my garden’s yield throughout the spring, summer and fall.

Here we are, six months after planting the indoor herb garden:

The rosemary is pretty sad. It was difficult to achieve germination of the rosemary seeds. Apparently, rosemary is also a very slow-growing plant. This one is very green, but not very big. A good friend is working on a cutting from her mature rosemary. I’m hoping I’ll remember to get it the next time I see her and transplant it with this little guy.

The cilantro is doing okay – it’s not large, either, but is growing. I’m not sure if this lack of growth is just because it’s winter, here, and sunlight isn’t at its best or if I’ve done something wrong in the care of Silly the Cilantro plant. It’s extremely fragrant when I handle it, though, which makes me happy.

Speaking of fragrant, the overachiever of the bunch is Mr. Basil (bah-sul, like the British say it).

He is green and growing (albeit, growing outward instead of straight up) and is also very fragrant when one handles the leaves.

I have yet to harvest anything from any of these plants – Basil might be the only one ready, but I’m thinking the leaves need a darker color before they are ripe for harvesting.

On a whim, The Husband decided to plant some garlic bulbs. In our normal fashion, we’d let a head of garlic sprout instead of using it to cook with, so he divided the cloves and stuck them in some potting soil. Of course, they’ve gone off like gangbusters.

The plants have been right at this size for a while, so I think they are in a dormant stage.

This weekend, I’m working on planning an outdoor garden. I’ll update you, soon, on that, and show you what I have planned. In the meantime, do you have any experience with any of these herbs we’re growing? Are we totally doing it wrong?

The possibilities are endless. It’s very likely that I plop my ass on the couch and remain there for the weekend – eating, watching sports and trolling Netflix instant for something good to watch. However, let’s explore those possibilities instead.

The first big one I’ve thought about is working to plan the garden I’d like to start. I’ve started a little Pinterest board to keep some ideas in check. There’s a reason that my board is named the Not-So-Green-Thumb board. I really don’t have any idea what I’m doing.

I talked it over with The Husband last night. I’d like to do raised beds. We have a teeny tiny yard, and he suggested what is probably the best spot for my little garden. It’s in full sun, and it wouldn’t require him to perform acrobatics with the lawnmower to work around it. It’s also the closest spot to the watering hose.

The biggest problem is that there is currently a dead tree right, smack in the middle of where my garden would grow. Yes. We have a dead tree in our yard that we’ve done nothing about for at least the past two years. This should surprise no one that knows us in real life.

Can we tackle the dead tree this weekend? I’d love to. More than that, I’d love to measure out the spot and start planning the garden. He asked me, last night, what I wanted to grow. I have a hard time knowing what I want to grow when I don’t have a good mental picture of what the space will be like. I need to plan out sizes and distances and all that before I can figure out what I want to grow. Here’s a short list of what I’m thinking, though.

-onions (He had a good suggestion for growing onions in PVC pipe. Wha? Must research.)
-spinach
-celery
-lettuce
-cabbage
-broccoli
-peas (these are runners, right? they need to have some sort of trellis?)

-tomatoes
-cucumbers
-cantaloupe (but, melons take a lot of room, right?)

I’m already growing some herbs in the kitchen, sad though they may be (I’m hoping they take off in the spring).

What would you grow in my garden?

The second possibility for the weekend is to tackle the chore that I try not to ever think of but which smacks me in the face every single morning. My closet and the gross amount of clothing I have accumulated and hoarded since I was in high school. Seriously. I still have plenty of clothes that I wore in high school. I am rapidly approaching my 15 year high school reunion. It’s ridiculous. I did a t-shirt purge a few years ago to try to conquer the vast number of college t-shirts I racked up in a sorority. I have clothes that are too long, clothes that are too short, too tight, and too big (not very many). Despite the fact that I KNOW HOW TO SEW, I have a huge number of clothes that need a button added, new zippers but in, or a seam repaired.

It’s really ridiculous. I currently pretty much live out of a laundry basket and wear the same two loads of laundry all the time. I can’t find anything in my closet(s). I can hardly walk in there because of the discarded clothing on the floor (it didn’t fit, it wasn’t the right thing, etc.).

I need to purge. I need to donate or keep (no sell option because I don’t want the hassle). Something needs to be done, though.

What does your weekend look like? Any fun plans, or are you stressing about chores you know you need to do?

4:45 am – The Husband wakes me up, as I requested him to. Because my earplugs are in, I don’t hear his first call to wake up. So, he starts jostling the bed to wake me. I wake up irritated. See the time for the main reason. I stumble through the morning routine of Bathroom First!

5:00 am – After about 2 seconds of thought, I decide NOT to go to the gym, as was originally planned and the reason for the early wake up. I’m still fighting off yesterday’s headache. Also, I look out the window and it’s SNOWING! YAY! I love snow. I love winter. So far, this winter has been a big fat dud. It’s been more spring-like than wintry. Bring on the snow, I say!

I lay back in bed until the real alarm goes off at 6. Then, I lay there some more.

6:15 am – Shower and try to find something to wear. I put on the stripey socks I got for free from an Earndit reward. They are fun, but I worry about the comments I’ll get at work. I quickly realize this is a stupid worry and wear my fun socks.

I attempt to blow-dry my hair into something resembling a professional look. I try out my new foundation makeup – I can barely tell it’s on, but once I slap some powder over it, I do notice that the effect is a little nicer than normal.

6:53 am – Running ahead of schedule. Remember that I should go ahead and leave to give the car time to warm up and the snow to melt a bit for easy removal. Grab leftover pizza from the fridge for lunch, my UK jacket and my Keen purse and I’m out the door.

7:03 am – Pull away from the house – front and back windshields clear of snow – roads are not at all slick or icy, just wet.

7:13 am – Turn in to the gas station on the way to work to pick up my incredibly healthy and nutritious breakfast – Frosted Cherry Pop-Tarts and a 20 oz. Diet Dr. Pepper.

7:20 am – Find a parking place in our incredibly ill-designed parking lot(s) and walk in to work, commenting to everyone I see about how much I love the snow and how I wish we’d get three feet of it before the day is over. Everyone looks at me like I’m crazy. This is the view from my window.

Work. I’m trying to catch up from an unscheduled day off, yesterday. My desk is, literally, piled high with paper. Today will be fun! I eat breakfast as I answer emails and voicemails. I much prefer emails to voicemails. I hate talking on the phone. Here are some of the tasks I complete throughout the morning:

- produce and email a cash flow forecast for the remainder of this week and next
- explain to someone that his inability to follow the policies and guidelines means that his expenses don’t necessarily get entered into the period he’d like them to be. GAAP and audit requirements trump his wishes.
- initiate a wire transfer payment to fund my company’s 401(k) match
- review 64 invoices that have been entered to our accounting system for accuracy, approvals, etc.
- distribute checks to those who have requested them (usually for some sort of note inclusion before they are mailed)
- initiate payments to 83 vendors totalling over $1M

8:55 am – Field a call from The Husband. Those aren’t normal at work, but he wanted to tell me about his schedule for the day and the reaction he got to his new mohawk and facial hair at work. Obviously, he doesn’t worry about co-worker comments like I do.

9:45 am – Realize that I have yet to drink any water. This is the effect of being back on the Diet Dr. Pepper sauce, again. I love my green Klean Kanteen – it’s stainless steel, so I don’t worry about BPA. My company provides water coolers from a local natural spring water company. I have no idea how it rates, but it tastes good. I love water and prefer it cold, but without ice (as I do all my drinks, but I never order it that way).

11:17 am – Stomach growling means it must be almost lunchtime. Field emails and mess around on the internet looking at Chromebooks until it’s time to eat!

11:45 am – Have leftover pizza for lunch. Continuing that healthy and nutritious theme from breakfast!

As I look out the window, I find that all my beloved snow has already melted.

Read through posts on my Google Reader subscriptions while I eat, I also spent some time reading up on the reversal of Prop 8 in California. (I really should write about current events more often in this space, but other people do it so well!)

12:04 pm – Second bottle of water filled! More reviews of invoices. Fun stuff!

1:40 pm – Hit a major productivity lag. It is everyday around this time that I feel like whatever it is must be THE LONGEST DAY EVER. I think it’s what those stupid “5 Hour Energy” commercials call “that 2:30 feeling.” Clearly, I’m an early bird.

2:30 pm – 3:00 pm – Conference call regarding bank migration. (Did you know they fly south for the winter?)

3:15 pm – Start making a mental To Do list for the afternoon. I should probably write these things down, because I’m more likely to do them if I get the satisfaction of crossing them off the list.

4:08 pm – Wrap up things at the office, and begin the commute home.

4:25 pm – Pull up to the house. Realize a student at our neighboring high school has left us a lovely gift of their lunch trash in the yard. Grumble about the state of youth, today, while I throw it in the recycling bin.

4:35 pm – Commence the long process of motivating myself to change into my running clothes and go back out in the cold for a 3.5 mile run rather than heeding the siren call of the comfortable couch, blanket and Kindle.

4:53 pm – Actually go get dressed for run. Realize that the Garmin is completely dead. Realize that I don’t need the Garmin to run, but I like the Garmin. Mess around on the internet waiting for it to charge.

5:44 pm – With Garmin charged to 55%, I head out for a run.

6:51 pm – Get back from my run. Yes, that’s how long it takes me to warm up, run 3.5 miles (with an unscheduled stop at the library for a bathroom break), and cool down.

7:00 pm – Realize that I am FAMISHED and that, as usual, we have no food in the house. I head out to pick up some dinner and eventually decide on Qdoba. For some reason, I always forget that this restaurant exists. We almost never eat there.

While eating my naked burrito, indulge in one of my guiltiest TV pleasures – watching the DVRd episode of Switched at Birth – an ABCFamily high school drama about sisters switched at birth and their lives after their families discover it.

8:30 pm – Get way too excited about the fact that Practical Magic is coming on just as my DVRd recording is finishing. Watch until The Husband comes home from his meeting.

10:00 pm – To bed!

First, who isn’t excited about The Hunger Games that comes out on March 23, 2012? If you haven’t heard of this series of books, then I’d like to see the size of the rock you’re living under. I think I’ve told everyone I know about it. I even divulged my love for it to some work people, and that is something that I do NOT do – I am not a sharer of my sacred things at work (except for KY basketball). Book to movie translations are never what I expect, and they rarely please me. However, I am still hopeful for this one. The trailer looks promising. The casting makes sense to me. I’m not sure that I’ll be in line for the first midnight showing, but I’m definitely going to plan it into the weekend. This, (hopefully, please, yes!), will conflict with some VIBW (Very Important Basketball Watching), but I can surely find an early start matinee to watch on Sunday before the tournament starts.

(Why, yes. My entire month of March weekends revolves around basketball. Did you think differently? I am obsessed. I take vacation days for the first and second round games of the tournament. I once took a spur-of-the-moment roadtrip to Syracuse, NY to watch a basketball game. That is the ONLY reason I’d ever go to Syracuse. Basketball. It’s for real, y’all.)

The second movie I’m excited about is, believe it or not, a Disney movie. Thank goodness it’s not animated, because then we would not get to see the glory that is Tim Riggins Taylor Kitsch shirtless (seriously, click on that link). The movie is John Carter and is based on a series of science fiction novels by Edgar Rice Burroughs. It sounds like a far-out story. A Civil War soldier finds himself on Mars as a prisoner of some giant aliens. He also finds that there is a princess in distress. I am guessing that he makes it his mission to save her, and I can guarantee you that if Martian ladies are like human ladies, she is excited about that. Traditionally, I am not a huge fan of science fiction. What I mean by that is that I like the popular science fictiony things but I am, by no means, what you would call a buff or a fan (although I did watch a show called Ancient Aliens last weekend). I’ve never read the novels from which the movie is adapted. Oh no. I am mainly just interested in the Tim Riggins Taylor Kitsch. It opens March 9th which almost certainly guarantees it to be a wait-until-it-gets-to-Netflix sort of movie. It may be smarter, anyway, to wait for that. After all, I do enjoy Tim Riggins Taylor Kitsch the most from the comfort of my couch.

While we are on the general subject of movies, did you know that they are making a movie from the game Battleship? When did this become a thing? Movies from board games? Really?!? Is there such a dearth of creativity or an unwillingness by the suits to fund a creative project that we now have to make movies that include a “from the makers of Hasbro toys” note?  I mean, “The battle for Earth begins at sea?” What is that? There were not aliens in the game Battleship! It appears that it doesn’t even have the customary tagline, “I sunk your battleship!” It does, however, have Tim Riggins Taylor Kitsch. Without long hair. I about died (on the inside, I tried to control myself on the outside) when I saw the trailer during the Super Bowl. I didn’t even NOTICE that Liam Neeson (a perennial favorite of mine) was in the trailer until I just re-watched it. You can see him at 00:13. You can see the shorn Riggins at 00:19 with much more excellent pan footage at 00:37. I am NOT looking forward to this movie. Even Texas Forever probably can’t save it for me. It’s a definite when-it-comes-to-Netflix-streaming scenario. It is slated for a May 18th release.

OK. I can accept that.

I still like to think about what I’d do in any given situation.

One such situation that I’d really never thought about happened the other evening. I was not prepared, and I worry that it showed.

My family was having a big dinner at my parents’ house. It involved aunts, uncles, cousins, my sister and her family. I don’t remember exactly what we were discussing, but I apparently said I “was in heaven” over something or other. My youngest nephew came running in to the kitchen to stand jump on the stool next to me.

He asked, “You were in heaven?!” His eyes were hugely round (Also, so was his mouth. He has this face that I call the Surprise! face, because it could not be more cartoony).

I had no idea what he was talking about. Apparently, I didn’t even realize what I’d said. Nor did I realize that 4 year old ears have a way of hearing everything – even from rooms away.

He repeated himself and clarified, “You SAID you were in heaven. [hint of an eyeroll] Does that mean you died? What was heaven like? What did it look like?”

I got flustered. How did I suddenly find myself in a discussion of life, death and an afterlife with a preschooler? Just like that, I realized that parents probably have this kind of thing happen all the time. You think you have perfectly worded, impactful statements about lots of important things, and then you flounder and say whatever it is you need to in order to avoid a serious discussion.

(This reminds me of the time I had to explain to the older nephew what a buttcrack is. He asked, “What is that line on people’s butts?” I searched, in vain, for some anatomically correct word, because of course, I would use the anatomical, matter-of-fact names for body parts with my non-existent children. It turns out that I know of no other word for that part of the human anatomy.)

I told him that what I really meant was that I was happy. I said that most people think heaven is a happy place (I avoided the idea that I’m pretty certain there isn’t such a thing as heaven) and that what I meant was a sort of pretending.

He was not mollified. He wanted to know what heaven looked like and if it was fun.

I deflected. I asked him the questions.

Me: What do you think heaven would look like?
Him: I think it’d be reaallly tall [hands way up high]. Like, about nine feet tall. [I guess that is tall when you're only three feet!]
Me: What color do you think things would be in heaven?
Him: Green. Definitely. It’s my favorite color. And there would be dinosaurs.
Me: Green is my favorite, too! We share that.
Him: Your favorite dinosaur is Triceratops, just like me. [huge grin, jump off the chair, exit as whirlwindedly as he'd entered]

Just like that, my big chance at an important discussion was over. I looked at my dad, whose shoulders were shaking with inhibited laughter. He just shook his head and grinned. The kid is funny. Everyone admits that.

How do you think I did? I mean, can one really discuss everything that the idea of an afterlife can entail with a 4-year old? When did he even learn about death? How do 4-year olds know what death is if it hasn’t happened to anyone really close to him?

Looking back on it, I’m pretty pleased with my effort. I remained noncommital on the idea of an afterlife. I avoided the sadness part of death, despite how ordinary it is. Instead, I engaged his creativity and critical thinking. I asked for his ideas rather than forcing my own ideas on him.

I think that’s what I’d try to do as a parent. I’d try to teach my child to think on their own – to approach a situation with wondering eyes and the fullness of possibilities for their own beliefs.

I can hear my sister and mom-friends chuckling. I know they are secretly thinking that this free-thinking imaginary child would come back to bite me in the ass when the teenage version of them tells me that their messy room is a way of expressing their individuality.

Thankfully, they do not know that my messy room is how I rebel against society and polite (okay, all) company.

——–

I ran six miles yesterday as part of my half marathon training. I’m four weeks into it and still haven’t died. Win! I told myself that I’d reward myself with a massage if I completed all my scheduled workouts for the week. I did, so I need to call and schedule it. I am in need of a massage, too. I am sore.

——–

My family had their annual karaoke party this past weekend. Yes, my family has an annual karaoke party. We like to sing and just about every single one of us is a microphone hog. One uncle ended up performing in drag. Another had panties thrown at him after a particularly moving (to some women of a certain age) rendition of an Elvis song. Good times. Not embarrassing at all!

——–

I think I have my first age spot. It’s on my cheek. I’ve been noticing it for a few months, but now I’ve also started noticing “age-defying makeup” commercials. I used to think I’d be all laissez-faire about getting older. I wouldn’t mind gray hair or wrinkles. I didn’t mind them for a while (the gray hairs – I’m not sure I have many wrinkles yet), but I caved and got my hair colored, and now I’m thinking of buying that dark spot concealer. Who am I, and why do I still feel 16 years old? (thank god I’m not 16 anymore)

——–

My nephews consistently cracked me up this weekend. When learning that the youngest one can spell his name -  A.D.A.M. – I asked him if he could spell my name. It’s a hard one, I understand. More vowels than consonants. When he struggled, I asked him if he knew with what letter my name started. By that time, he’d lost interest and run off.

The older one piped up and said, “I know! It starts with an A.”

Now, this kid is good at his letters and getting good at his reading, so I gave him a quizzical look.

“My name doesn’t start with an A – not like Adam’s!” I told him.

He insisted and said, “Uh huh! AUNT LYDIA! That starts with an A.”

He’s got a point.

1. Make it work or move on. If you aren’t happy you need to do something about it. This is hard to guage because happiness isn’t tangible. However, I think I’m making strides toward becoming a happier person. I evaluate invitations and actions to determine if the item will make me happy or not. If it won’t, I turn down the invitation. I evaluate if doing something or not doing something will make me happier. The bottom line is that I’m working on this, and I think I am a happier person than I was in December. Baby steps, right?

2. Post a full Post-It note pad of Operation Beautiful notes. I bought a Post-It note pad, but I have yet to write a note. It’s on my list to do.

3. Learn to cook whole, traditional, seasonal foods using Nourished Kitchen. This project was going really well for about three weeks. I got busier and started letting it slip. Then, I got complaints about how the recipes I was cooking were too “out there” and when were we going to start eating “regular” food, again. Since I stopped focusing on this project, I’ve noticed that we both get annoyed and stressed out trying to figure out what we’re having for dinner. We’ve eaten takeout more often, and I know that we’re not eating as healthily. I’d love to get back into this but I’m not prepared to buy and make two dinners nor can we afford to eat two separate foods – especially since one of us won’t eat leftovers.

4. Stop deleting a ton of emails every day and start going through the process of unsubscribing from them. I have not started this.

5. Faithfully keep a personal journal. This has been very hard for me to accomplish, and I think I’ve only been successful on a handful of days. I want to work harder at it. I think I need to start waking up earlier and focusing on this practice in the morning.

Five Concrete Goals

1. Run 500 miles. In January, I battled a cold, a sinus infection, and some lower back problems. I managed only 7 runs for a total of 22.76 miles. That puts me short of the monthly average (41.6) to meet this goal, but I’m still confident that I’ll meet it.

2. Finish up the credit card debt snowball. I’m working on this. I’m trying to rein my spending habits in, but it’s so difficult once I’ve started to spend! I need to work on this more in February.

3. Lose 30 pounds in 2012. January was a challenging month in regards to this goal. I’m really trying to focus more on how I feel rather than what the scale says, but I’m up a pound since the beginning of the year.

4. Once and for all give up the diet soda addiction. I rocked this goal for 21 days. I didn’t even want a soda. Then, I went to the movies with some friends on the 21st. One friend got a Diet Coke, and I could not stop thinking about how much I wanted one, too. The next day, I had one. Then, I had another. I’ve had at least one soda every day since! Tomorrow is a new day. It’ll be a day without sodas.

5. Finish every single unfinished quilt in my house. There has been no sewing. Need to do!