Oh! Look! A Squirrel!

Another Costco Adventure

2026-03-25T01:15:53.506-04:00

I delivered my daughter to her workplace for a 3 to 8 shift, then I made a bee line to the White Cross Dispensary to buy some meds from my favourite pharmaceutical supplier. I was sold on them years ago when I walked into the jount demanded drugs. The pharmacist, Joan, came up to the service counter and said to me, "Let's make it official." She shoved me back hard. "There! Now I'm a dope pusher."

I'd Like To Thank The Following Strangers

2026-03-25T01:15:53.505-04:00

Three weeks into a hell that has me feverish, coughing, and my chest congested, I'd like to thank the various stores that I patronize which do not wipe down shopping kart hand bars. I would also like to commend the placement of many hand empty santizer stations throughout some of your establishments.

Living With ADHDers

2026-03-25T01:15:53.504-04:00

2026-03-25T01:15:53.503-04:00

Console Games That Should Have Made It.

2026-03-25T01:15:53.502-04:00

Call of Doodie:Seek and Deploy

It's the future where all home bathroom facilities are banned. The only toilets are hidden all over the city. You have just returned from a fibre rich meal at the "Bran & Hot Coffee Eatery", the city's only legal restaurant chain, when you discover someone has stolen your port-o-potty from your back yard, the one you disguised as home abattoir.

Donkey Bong

It's a whole new world for Jaun's drug smuggling mule. Watch as the Mexican drug cartel tracks down the Donkey when they find out this critter has been smoking some of the profits. Watch as Daonkey Bong plays musical bottle tokes.

NFL 2011:Steroid Laboratory
Watch as your favorite player does the delicate balancing act of cyclying their steroid use in order to avaoid detection in random blood testing. Watch as players scamble to hide used syringes, doctor shop for injectables, and order larger helmuts for thier thickening brow, and smaller jock straps to tighten up the ver shrinking jewelry set.

Disney's Mickey And The Mouse Trap Factory
Watch as Mickey and his mice friends organize an escape from Walt's Mouse trap Factory. Jailed for instigating labour unresst in Disneyland, Mickey and his fellow rodents rise up against the man and make a jailbreak. They face obstacles like the sticky trap maze, the water drop trap, arsenic and cheese treats,

Super Mario Bros. And Wendy Go Au Natural
Watch as gremlins staeal our heros clothing and leave them with little choice but cover themselves in whatever they find in the world they are passing through. Video seques precede entry to each new level, from the garden of Edaren sequence to the Boisie Idaho Naturalist convention.

Need For Speed:Wheelchair Bound- Fiery Car Crashes

Wii Rave Party
You and your friends attend the late night rave hosted by Dj DumDum.

Super Meat Boy (actually that is a real Xbox 360 game)
Look that up yourself

Halo:Statue

Rock Band 4:Mini Pops Revenge

Mafia III- Laying Low In Montreal

Tales of Monkey Around Island.

Swords and Bandaids

Lara Croft and The Pole of Dance

Enslaved:Lincoln Lost Legacy

Age of Conan:Third Time is the Charm

The Little Girl Who Could (but never got any credit)

2026-03-25T01:15:53.501-04:00

Remember that thirteen-year-old teenage girl, Rebecca Black, whose family payed for her to record the song 'Friday' and have a video made. And then it was posted up on Youtube, and just about everyone in the world just piled on that kid, calling the song and her performance 'the worst, ever!'
As of April 1, 2011, her video has had over 75 million views, 1.3 million comments, and over 1.4 million "dislikes" from YouTube users. The song has earned about 60K from iTunes and Youtube royalties, none of which went to Rebecca.
Her parents are now suing the vanity recording company on Rebecca's behalf. Ark Music has not handed over the masters of Rebecca's recordings. Recording which the Black's payed for and own. In the meantime, Ark Music has collected and retained all the money earned by Rebecca's recording work.
The song, as based on Rebecca's version and video, has earned countless more monies for the folks who have created and posted parodies on Youtube and the like. Friday night on 'Late Night With Jimmy Fallon', guest Stephen Colbert sang 'Friday' as part of a 'The Fallon Colbert Project' charity, helping to raise a total-to-date of about 90K.
Ain't that odd! I mean for a kid. One that was so lambasted by all level of news services and felt obligated to respond on an interview to the reporter's challenge to sing her song on national tv. A kid woefully hurt by a bandwagon mentality of public ridicule on Youtube. Isn't it odd that this kid has generated such a lot of good and funds for others in need.
That's a test by fire if there ever was one.
Rebecca still wants to sing and preform. Ryan Seacrest has hired her to cover the 'Kid's Choice Awards' for his website. Somebody recognizes a winner.

10 Things

2026-03-25T01:15:53.500-04:00

Adhd

2026-03-25T01:15:53.499-04:00

The Launch Pad

As a self-aware ADHDer who has done some reading on the subject, I am somewhat familiar with the Launch Pad and it is part of my fairly decent ADHD Toolbox.

Launch (& Landing) Pad Areas— aka. Losing My Stuff In All The Old Familiar Places— involves setting up an particular area in your home, preferably near the front door, where, with considerable practice, you will consistently place all your common and often used day-to-day stuff. Whenever you enter your home it is a place to empty and sort accumu, and then in the morning, retrieve all those important things thatwillgomissinganywaysonceyoulookawayfromthem when you leave the home.

It's also an area to place all the stuff you may or may not get around to preparing the night before which, depending on the success of preparation and a keen sense of observation, you will take with you when you leave the next day. There is always a chance that you may wonder "How did that all that stuff get there?" by the time morning rolls around.

I think it's worth giving the Launch Pad area a shot. Here's a few suggestions and some possible improvements that I just pulled out of my butt... Figuratively.

Tie all items together with some twine. If you grab one thing, you grab 'em all.
If you drive, make your car the Launch Pad area. This will work for awhile, longer if you have a really big car.
Make enough lunches to last the week and keep them in the fridge or freezer. Keep the fridge or freezer at the front door. Better still, install a walk through freezer as your foyer.
Spread a handful of thumb tacks on the floor before the exit door. This should slow you down considerably, and while you're hopping around in pain you just see your launching pad. Note that Lego is an effective substitute for thumb tacks although Lego is a terrible way to stick a note to your bulletin board.

Things to Keep @ Front Door Launch Pad:

Keys
Wallet
Sunglasses
Map -of your driveway with a picture of your car
Lunch Bag
Lunch - was supposed to be in the bag
Shopping List
Baby
Replacement thumb tacks/Lego pieces and Band-Aids
Clean Underwear (your own)
Back Pack... scratch that- unless you packed all this crap in it
Cellphone
Tickets ( theatre or parking )
Other Stuff which I don't recall at the moment

Do NOT Keep @ Front Door Launch Pad:

Weight Sets
Egg Salad Sandwiches
Chocolate Fondue and Sterno
Pets
Firearms
Porn Collection
Razor and Shaving Creme
TV Remote
BBQ
Tool Chest on Wheels
Preset Mouse Traps
Only Copy of Fire Escape Route

Normal or Not!

2026-03-25T01:15:53.498-04:00

Disorder is what the DSM calls it.
I look at "normal" and ADHD this way.
ADHD is normal in occurrence, in that it's a genetic normality.
It is unique to us humans and only exists as a certain percentage of the population at the moment.
If we start to breed like rabbits we could take over the world!! Not sure what we would do with it. I'll get back to you on that.
What is not normally is our general lot in the world.
Institutions, from education to prisons to employment and others, we are often given the short end of the stick, if not outright smacked with it.
Changes and acceptance are both big horses for institutions to turn.
Here, in Ontario, Education stills views a ADHD as a behavioural issue, despite evidence that ADHDers are profoundly different learners than compared to 90+ % of enrolled students.
An extreme example of the situation would be the programs in place to deal with learning styles of Aspergers students in many school boards, and for good reason.
However, school populations of ADHD students receive no such accommodation.
Therein lies the rub.
We ADHDers grow up without the same privileges afforded the the other 90-95%, a education suited to our way of learning.

The Royal Visit - the "B" List

2026-03-25T01:15:53.497-04:00

The Royal have a sense of humour, right?

Today the Royal couple of Prince Charles landed in Toronto to a twenty-one gun salute—

1. Camilla was so rattled that she began to run and didn't stop until early hit Woodbine where she won the daily double.

Tips on Kicking the Cigarette Habit

2026-03-25T01:15:53.496-04:00

Tips
Pick a Quit date! Then pick another date, and then another date, at least a dozen to start... I mean stop... I mean quit.
I didn't make it the first thorough 58th time I quit. I think the idea of having many quit dates works. I think the idea of having a quit hour is even better, and book about five or six hundred of those in succession. I figure if you keep quitting right after a stumble, then you are at least one for one on the smoke-quit ratio.

Make a list of reasons why you want to quit wether it be for health, family, money. Take your list to either a highrise buliding or to the bottom of a very steep hill. Now, as fast as you can, run up the stairs or that hill as fast as you can until you drop. Wlk back down and take a bite of the paper list and eat it. Repaet this until you have either eaten the entire list iof reasons, died, or you get the idea behind breathing.

They are lots of tools for quitting. Patches medicine filters gum hypnosis support group. By far my favourite is the hostage method. You hire two heartless thugs who will kidnap your most cherished person in the world. One will keep you peep in a room and communicty by video phone with the other thug who will accompany you everywhere you go. If you smoke your shadow will tell his buddy to light up a smoke and extinguish it on your friends forehead.

Dennis keep this curt to point form.

Plant Rights

2026-03-25T01:15:53.495-04:00

Plant Rights

I was thinking of the Christmas trees only because of the annoying requests from my kids to put one up.

How many senseless acts I have commited to plants over the years. Houseplants have never
susrvived me
I eat plants
I chop the heads off grass
I

My Answer to a Recent Question

2026-03-25T01:15:53.494-04:00

Why is the FISH a Christian symbol?- Lady D

First off, thank you for the question Lady D. I was surprised to hear from you, despite your death in that horrific accident in France so many years ago which had absolutely nothing to do with the "Royals" or the "Land Mines for Safer Playgrounds" lobby group. Mind you, the many many pictures taken at the crash site were remarkable in detail, although most lacked proper light and composure. Now, to answer your question.

The symbol evolved (get it.. get it! Darwin joke! Get it) from the Greek word "Ikhthus" meaning fish. Most who would have answered your question would state it most likely relates to the "fish" story where Jesus discovered cloning by replicating a fish and a loaf of bread in order to feed a bunch of people, or from "fisherman" or "fisher of men" stories relating to J.C. and Apostles, an early evangelical Christian rock band.
The symbol was thought to be used by early Christians to indicate the "secret" gathering places for religious practice and the exchanging of fine Tupperware products. It was also used to mark tombs of the faithful who had actually died (Lazarus, you clown), and to indicate "Fish for Sale" by a vendor in of the many marketplaces.
Pranksters were known to slap a parchment with a drawing of a big fish to the back of an unsuspecting victim. The poor sap would walk around, snickers and hushed laughter directed his way until stopped by perhaps a friendly Roman soldier who would point out what the jokesters had done. After a brief lecture on keeping ever alert to such shenanigans, the soldier would summarily execute the rube on the spot.
It appears many Romans in that neck of the desert lands did not take Greek lessons seriously, or they were way too busy growing the empire to worry about another spin-off sect of Judaism, like Christianity or Islam or scientology.
Clueless were the Romans that many of the new Christians bore the Ikhthus symbol near their home's doorways . The Romans, of course, were amusingly amazed by how many people in their purview had the surname "Fish".

Source(s):

wikipedia, Jesus, a really old Roman guy down the street from me. It's the house with the chariot out front.

The Recession Part 1

2026-03-25T01:15:53.493-04:00

My Hair Loss Secrets!
Hi! My name is Dennis and I'm have phalacrosis, not totally though.
I am one of the many men who are “follically challenged”. Most of us eventually accept natures wrath with all it's cruel and cold manner (I wear a hat, especially in the winter) and it's silly genetic coding delivered by Mr. Heredity. I did not ask, and most would not, for my hair to abandon my once hirsute head.
There are many reasons for thinning hair or hair loss, aside from medical conditions and medicines that cause hair loss, and, yes, there is a thing called “female pattern baldness”, but I'd rather talk about myself.
But hey! What are you gonna do... besides panic, do a comb-over, cut your hair short, buy that spray-on hair-paint from Ron Popeil, start rubbing hot radishes or onions on your thinning scalp, have a cow lick your head, rub dry bees on your head. Concoctions including one that consisted of toes of a dog, the refuse of dates, and a hoof of an ass (not my ass), was once used by Egyptian royalty. All these were considered at one time cures for baldness.
Baldness is even mentioned in the Christian bible (Kings 2: 23) where a bald man was mocked and chased by a large group of youths. According to the story, the baldy stopped and turned to deliver the youth a curse in the name of God, after which two bears came out of the woods and mauled forty-two of the misguided youngsters. The bald man ran back to the injured youth and stole any scalps pieces that the bears had torn off, placed them on his head and ran around the village shouting at top of his lungs, “Look at me, look at me! I have hair! I'm so pretty”. That leads me to believe that there may have been other reasons he was chased out-of-town, being it was a Christian town and all.

My Less than true explanations for my balding.
I just learnt that Nair is not a good shampoo.
My wife secretly yanks follicles out of my head while I sleep. Revenge for my snoring, no doubt!
Stress!!! It drives up blood pressure. High blood pressure pushes out the hair follicles from your scalp and leaves you an embarrassed corpse after your massive stroke!
Baseball caps Do cause balding.
My brain is still growing, and it's starting to push out my hair making space for it's enormity.
I touch myself, OK! It's supposed to be a perfectly normal and healthy activity, and it's great for developing an awesome grip.

How I explain the recession.
I am losing my hair so gradually, that everyone will eventually notice.
I have been donating my follicles to cancer patients and hairless Chihuahuas.
I haven't lost my hair, it has simply migrated south.... via my back... to my ass. Do you know how hard it is to comb your back hair, let alone your ass hair!
My hair loss is because I, in particular produce way-way-way too much of the male sex hormone which causes side effects such as hair loss and extreme super sexual stamina.
I joined The Hairless Club for men! Not only am I a member, I'm also the president, secretary, and that weird guy who fetches coffee and donuts.
I have half of the Yule Brenner gene.
I used a Binford B8000 hair dryer, with 8000 watts of scalp scorching heat delivered by a twin turbo aviation grade induction fan, capable of delivering over 600 knots of super heated hair drying. That would the equivalent of Katrini times a factor 3... in Hell... on a hot day.

Ideas

2026-03-25T01:15:53.492-04:00

Isotope Shortage!

Have an election. Couldn't hurt!
Get the Maple reactors going. If they are good enough for South Korea, they are good enough for us. Our technical expertise is very, very good . We can modify the reactors safely and have them producing at 50% in short order. 50% is more than enough to meet and exceed our ability to supply the world with medical isotopes and smoke detectors. We could always hire KIA to work on them. They make a pretty darn good car, and they have 5-year warranties.
Cut the isotopebie thing in halfsies, or foursies.
So what if the Americans want to Harper to pull a Diefenbaker and pretend it's the “New Government of Canada” decision to mothball the Maple reactors. Besides, I don't think you can just chuck a reactor like these into Lake Ontario like they did all those Avro Arrows. I'm not counting the Darlington or Pickering nuclear sites. They work differently and they have great security as you can see in the photos I've included..
Ask MDS Nordion to forgive the idiocy which is now the AECL head honcho, as she is heavily infused with Harperite 27 -an abnormal element that has an unpredictable political half-life. Exposure causes vast amounts of flip-flopping and finger pointing. Funny that they fire the person who warned them time and again about the state of the reactor, which was her job as head of the CNSC.
MDS Nordion, don't sue for money, sue the government to start up the Maple reactors. That, and for a radioactive car in every driveway, just like Atomic Man's and Fallout Boy's. Just for the record, that doesn't mean you can buy AECL either.
Did I mention we have two Maple reactors. No waiting! And I just love those cookies.
Replace Minister of Natural Resources Lisa Raitt with Bonnie Raitt! Rock On!!
Why would a Government want to sell a producing nuclear reactor to the private sector. Let's see? Maybe, huge profits to be realized, if the present ministers get out in time. Cobalt-60 could get a bit pricey if you have to answer to shareholders rather than governmental regulations regarding medical isotopes. The cost to preform the first Cobalt-60 (ala Chalk River) treatment was $50,000. Compare that to the price of radium treatment used at that time at $50,000,000 to preform the same procedure. That's way cheaper and less yucky than leeches.
Double up patients on the treatment table. Treat one for a tumour and maybe get some sort of x-ray or g-ray image on Polaroid paper.
Have an airlift for patients in time for North Korea's next nuclear bomb test. If a little irradiation helps you get better, then a lot ought to cure you.

I bite the cow yesterday

2026-03-25T01:15:53.491-04:00

The Lost Thumb of Jesus

2026-03-25T01:15:53.490-04:00

Diet Confusions

2026-03-25T01:15:53.489-04:00

Atkins Diet
Meat of all kinds in, carbs out.
Founder died last year, wieghing out at a 192 lbs., leaving what some experts described as "a less than healthy corpse".
Sometimes Confused With: The Chet Atkins Diet.

Signs Your Doctor Giving You The Flu Shot Is A Quack

2018-03-22T21:40:00.000-04:00

Places a tourniquet around your neck so he can "raise a good vein."

Tries to inject vaccine using a tattoo needle. Realizing his error, he offers you a belly button piercing at half-price.

He rolls up your sleeve—and pulls down your pants.

Asks if you are allergic to eggs or deep, sensual, massages.

Insists on hooking up defibrillator before proceeding

Takes a selfie while the needle is in your arm.

Offers you a propofol drip before giving you the flu shot.

Sticks you with the needle and surprisingly remarks "Whoa! Your arm has a real bone in it!"

Sterilizes your arm by taking a swig of vodka and licking your shoulder clean.

Insists you wear a shower cap, sit behind the curtain, and call him "Mother!"

Lays a pistol on the desk and says, "Just in case something goes horribly wrong."

Has difficulty pronouncing your name without slurring and giggling and offers you an alcohol swab to suck on.

He warns, "You're gonna feel a little prick," then asks you to reach into his pocket and check for loose change.

Signs The Doctor Giving You a Flu Shot is a Quack

2014-11-27T19:16:00.000-05:00

Places a tourniquet around your neck so he can "raise a good vein."
Tries to inject vaccine using a tattoo needle. Realizing his error, he offers you a belly button piercing at half-price.
He rolls up your sleeve—and pulls down your pants.
Asks if you are allergic to eggs or deep, sensual, massages.
Insists on hooking up defibrillator before proceeding
Takes a selfie while the needle is in your arm.
Offers you a propofol drip before giving you the flu shot.
Sticks you with the needle and surprisingly remarks "Whoa! Your arm has a real bone in it!"
Sterilizes your arm by taking a swig of vodka and licking your shoulder clean.
Insists you wear a shower cap, sit behind a curtain, and call him "Mother!"
Lays a pistol on the desk and says "Just in case something goes horribly wrong."
Has difficulty pronouncing your name without slurring and giggling.
Instead of warning, "You're gonna feel a little prick," he asks you to reach into his pocket and check for loose change.

ADHD Tools ( 4 the Useless )

2012-08-07T15:25:00.001-04:00

The Launch Pad

As a self-aware ADHDer who has done some reading on the subject, I am somewhat familiar with the Launch Pad. It is one of many tools from my fairly decent ADHD Toolbox.

Creating a Launch (& Landing) Pad area— aka "How To Lose My Stuff In All The Old Familiar Places"— involves setting up an particular area in your home, preferably near the front door, where, with considerable practice, you will consistently place all your common and often used day-to-day stuff. It will be a place for such things as car keys, change, To-Do lists, and the many other things thatwillgomissingoryouwillforgetanywaysonceyoulookawayfromthem.

Before beddy-byes, prepare for the next day by adding the stuff you'll need for the next day. Pay attention to what you place on your Launch Pad to avoid the "How did all that stuff get there?" moment when morning rolls around.

Here's a few suggestions and possible improvements that I just pulled out of my butt... Figuratively.

Link all Launch Pad items together with some twine or stretchy cord. This way if you grab one thing, you grab 'em all.
If you drive, make your car the Launch Pad area. This will work for awhile, longer if you have a really big car.
Make enough lunches to last the week and keep them in the fridge or freezer. Keep the fridge or freezer at the front door. Better still, install a walk through freezer as your foyer.
Spread a handful of thumb tacks on the floor before the exit door. This should slow you down considerably, and while you're hopping around in pain you may just think "Oh yeah! I have a Launch Pad!". Note that Lego is an effective substitute for thumb tacks, although Lego is a terrible way to stick a note to your bulletin board.

Things to Keep @ Front Door Launch Pad:

Keys
Wallet
Sunglasses
Map -of your driveway with a colour photo of your car
Lunch Bag
Lunch - was supposed to be in the bag
Shopping List
Baby
Replacement thumb tacks/Lego pieces and Band-Aids
Clean Underwear (your own)
Back Pack... scratch that- unless you packed all this crap in it
Cellphone
Tickets ( theatre or parking )
Other Stuff which I don't recall at the moment

Do NOT Keep @ Front Door Launch Pad:

Weight Sets
Egg Salad Sandwiches
Chocolate Fondue and a can of Sterno
Pets
Firearms
Porn Collection
Razor and Shaving Creme
TV Remote
BBQ
Tool Chest on Wheels
Preset Mouse Traps
Only Copy of Fire Escape Route

ʘ‿ʘ

New Rules for "Devil's Night"

2010-10-30T22:59:00.000-04:00

I think it is important that youth, and those young at heart, and vandals in general, be considerate and as cordial as possible when practicing “prank vandalism”.

Here are some tips:

Use anti-bacterial soap when soaping windows.

Using 1-ply paper will do for tee-peeing houses and is less expensive. Use recycled paper when possible. NOTE- Recycled paper IS NOT "recently used in your bathroom" paper.

Spray targets with a coat of Pam or some other non-stick coating before egging. Bacon, toast, and coffee are welcome additions.

Bags should be lined with fire retardant and a deodorizer.

DO NOT, I repeat, do not include the dog when placing the dog poop it the bag!

Strict arson laws must be obeyed. Instead of using an actual flame, I suggest one of those battery powered L.E.D. candles be placed in the bag of poop. You could also try attaching a large, easy to read note to the bag of poop. eg.”This bag of poop is on FIRE! Quick! Stomp your foot down on it several times to extinguish the raging flames!"

Other Names for Devil's Night

“Mischief Night”, “Gate Night”, “Goosey Night”, “Cabbage Night”, “Mizzy Night”, “Miggy Night”, “Tick-Tack Night”, “Corn Night”, “Trick Night”, “Micky Night”, “Ding-Dong Ditch”, “Knick knock, Knicker-knocking”, “Knock n' Run”, “Knock Knock, Zoom Zoom”, "Ring and Run", “Nicky-Nicky Nine Doors”, “Knock, Knock, Ginger” "Bobby Knocking", “Hedge Hopping", "Chapdoor Runaway", "Chappy".

ʘ‿ʘ

Improvements: Elevators

2010-10-17T21:17:00.003-04:00

Put in swanky washrooms. You have a couple of minutes to kill, why not freshen up while you wait. And it has to have an attendant, with hot towels and tips on horse races.
Install kiddy-slides on all floors. Elevator Up - Slide Down.
Convert elevator buttons to also operate as a slot machine.
In order to carry more passengers, install a much larger propeller. The current ones on elevator ceilings are way, way, too small.
Install a music jukebox so I can choose my own elevator music.
"Mystery Floor" button.
Have elevators that go side to side, as well as up and down, so you can get off right at the door.
Doors that make the "swish" sound, like the ones on the turbo-lift on Star Trek.
Mirrored floors on elevators. What? It's so I can check if I have gum on the bottom of my shoe! Why else would you put a mirror on the floor?
Vending machines for snacks, coffee, soda, samosas and stuff. (but not the stuff you get from a washroom vending machines)
Elevator music by actual preforming elevator musicians.

ʘ‿ʘ

These Guys Saw Me Coming

2010-10-01T16:23:00.006-04:00

Things I learned When Shopping for Eyeglasses

"Specials" mostly apply to the over-sized twisty-straw frames with neon sparkles. You'll find these frames in the greasy box at the back of the store, near the washrooms- follow the smell. It's right next to the box full of fake mustaches and plastic noses.

You have to choose lenses. Selections are rated by quality. For instance: "Better Than the Best", "The Best", "Good", "OK", "OK.. In a Brightly Lit Room", "Recycled Cut Glass", and the special's "Why Bother At All With These- Get Yourself a Dog and A White Cane Instead". The “Special” does not include the cane or dog.

Extras apparently add to the cost. The glasses are not as complete as advertised.

Nose, brows & stache extra!

Pre-scratched lenses are the ones included in all “Specials”. An “anti-scratch” coating can be applied for a large fee. That will have to be done at the factory level. The factory will divert your lenses from the “pre-scratch application” production line to the “anti-scratch protection... sort of, kind of” production line.

UV protection is extra. It helps to prevent your eyeballs from being irradiated by the sun or 150 watt light bulbs. I think it's kind of expensive for the UV treatment, considering most ten dollar sunglasses have the same coating.

You will need an anti-reflective coating if you don't want to see the back of your yucky retinas projected forward onto your lenses.

You will usually when get a handsome flexible plastic eyeglass envelope for free. Allegedly this will keep you glasses protected from minor wind penetrations, fingerprints, and from some of the damage that may result from carrying your glasses very carefully.

Purchase the lens cleaner from the store - 1. It’s really expensive and therefore pretty good stuff, and, B) It has the store's name on it so you can remember where not buy next time.

WARNING - Do not apply lens cleaner fluid directly to eyeballs. Do not consume the lens cleaner fluid. Doing so will probably result in blindness. If either event occurs, feel around for the phone. Good luck dialing. Remember the dial pad numbers start with "1" at the top, keypads start with "7".

Bifocals cost more. They come in two styles. The ones with the line across the lens, and the ones without the line across the lens. You pay more for the ones without the line. I don't think I should pay extra for something that's not there.

ʘ‿ʘ

Ten Things That Happened Today

2010-09-21T00:33:00.004-04:00

On September 20th I awoke at 5:00 am. Then again at 5:20, 5:46, 6:20, 6:27, and 6:53. I find alarm clocks are not strict enough these days.
I went to eye doctor. I have now achieved prescription status. It's glasses or contacts. I lose my readers all the time, so I think "contacts". Eye doc says I won't lose my glasses because I'll be wearing them all the time. He may know a lot about my eyes, but he sure doesn't know a lot about me.
On the other hand, my eye pressure is 22 mm Hg, so I might not need the glasses for very long. You know you've let yourself go when your eyes get the equivalent of high blood pressure.
My sister-in-law cut her finger with an electric hedge trimmer. I suggested she use nail clippers next time.
Stopped at Mickey D's to use washroom. The place was disgusting and smelly... before I got in there. Hanging on the back of the door I found the sheet they sign when staff have inspected the washroom for "cleanliness" on "an hourly basis". I wrote down the phone number of my eye doctor.
Wife got me to stop at the Sally Ann thrift store. She found one of those inflatable beds in a bag and insisted on buying it, despite the fact we enough beds at home for everyone. She says she has always wanted one! I wanted a Ferrari, but the Sally Ann was all out of those.
In my backyard I put a pipe in the ground so I could stick up an umbrella clothesline. Then I washed all our umbrellas and hung them to dry.
I made spaghetti for supper last night. I was too lazy to cook this evening, so I made up a little something from yesterdays leftovers. Spaghetti sandwiches will not be a regular favourite at my house.
After supper my daughter went to the mall with a friend of hers. I asked that she be careful as usual, and to catch an early bus to get home. She is very good about texting me with updates when she is out. At 9:00pm, later than I expected, she texted, "Bus is running late. Me and Steph are getting a ride with this old guy. He has lots of room in his big white van. C'ya soon". My eye pressure went up to 32 before I passed out, banging my head on my wife's recently purchased inflatable bed. My head would not ache as much if only she had taken the time to inflate it.
My home is somewhat unkempt today. Fortunately it is night-time, and I can remedy that quickly. I will turn off my light soon and all will be well.

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