OMG Fatty!

Thank You!

noreply@blogger.com (Holly G) — Thu, 28 Aug 2008 14:42:00 +0000

I just checked back in today after a fairly long (and I hope understandable) absence to see the kind thoughts left for me and Lily. I just wanted to say thank you, it means a lot to me.

It's my blog and I'll ramble if I want to

noreply@blogger.com (Holly G) — Thu, 12 Jun 2008 08:11:00 +0000

Stop reading now if you don't care.

At this point, it's not Lily's absence that gets me, it's the subtle reminders and habits I've formed around her that make me miss her. Every time I hear a noise, I look for Lily. Every time I leave a bowl on the floor, I wonder if Lily will get to it. Every time I look away from the computer screen, I look for her. Every time I walk in the door, I still expect to pay the kitty toll. Every time I realize she's gone, I feel lonely. When I feel lonely, I want nothing more than to find my sweet ball of fur and hold her while thinking about how much I enjoy her purr.

She was always my buddy, she's been with me through so much. I got her when I was 9 and still living in California. She's been with me through cross country moves, elementary school, middle school, high school, moving houses, new friends, boyfriends, jobs, college, first careers, living on my own for the first time, my parents' divorce and my marriage.

I remember her fondly and I know I made the right decision. Her last week was pretty heartbreaking and I feel like I've spent all of it crying. I'm generally ok and functional until somebody calls me and asks how I'm doing. What am I supposed to say? I'm obviously not ok but it's hard not to be dismissive of my own feelings; some habits die hard.

I'm now in limbo about what to do with all the kitty accouterments (e.g. food bowls, litter box, toys, etc.). I'm obviously not going to keep them and their presence is a remind of her absence. Getting rid of them now, however, feels like I'm trying to rid myself of all signs of past kitty ownership. I'm just not ready to clean my hands of her, so to speak. The best I've been able to do is throw away her medicine and pick up her wet food bowl. Everything else hurts too much to move. I broke down in tears over the treat jar!

My default coping mechanism is retail therapy. I had even decided what I wanted. I just can't do it, though. A purse, while extremely cute, is just a purse. I've decided to donate the money I would have spent on that purse to an animal charity instead. I haven't decided which one yet. August suggested paying for all expenses for a cat so some little girl could take her/him home; a sort of pet sponsorship. I'm not sure yet, I'm still debating. Regardless of what I choose, though, I'm happier with this than with my retail therapy.

Rest in Peace My Sweet Baby

noreply@blogger.com (Holly G) — Wed, 11 Jun 2008 16:04:00 +0000

Lily
February 1992 - June 11, 2008

Kitty cuddles

noreply@blogger.com (Holly G) — Wed, 11 Jun 2008 03:39:00 +0000

I think this is what I'll miss the most. She's half asleep, twitching, and purring. She loved to purr.

An update, although I'm sure you all know. I went back to the vet on Monday because she had been throwing up all of her medicine. The vet found a mass in her lower intestine that she (vet) believed was the cause of the vomiting and indicative of lymphoma. After a brief discussion of care options, all of which included some form of hospitalization or extreme measures (e.g. IVs, feeding tubes, chemo, etc.), I decided not to pursue treatment. Because of her swift decline, and my belief that euthanasia is kind and humane in the right circumstances, the vet recommended putting her to sleep soon. Lily was given a pain killer, a steroid, and some fluids to make her comfortable. I'm bringing her back in tomorrow morning to put her to sleep. Every time she purrs, I second guess myself; every time she walks, I realize just how sick she is, how much pain she's in, and I know I'm doing the right thing. It still hurts.

nom nom nom

noreply@blogger.com (Holly G) — Tue, 10 Jun 2008 03:00:00 +0000

Fancy meeting you here

noreply@blogger.com (Holly G) — Sun, 08 Jun 2008 04:00:00 +0000

Why oh why is my cat hanging out in the bathtub now?

She EATS!

noreply@blogger.com (Holly G) — Sat, 07 Jun 2008 13:26:00 +0000

Without a syringe! YAY!

Health problems

noreply@blogger.com (Holly G) — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 13:43:00 +0000

My two regular readers know the details, but I feel the need to talk about this all the time and I don't want to bore them. I'm going to write here for you to read (or not) as you feel.

Last week, I noticed she was not eating much or using the litter box and she seemed more tired. I was overall pretty worried. I took her to the vet (general neighborhood vet) who did a blood test and urinalysis and determined that she has some serious liver problems, but he didn't know what. He also could treat, but "didn't think I'd be happy with that option. And I'd have to start making decisions soon." He made it sound like she had one paw in the grave! Maybe she does, but I'm not ready to give up. I decided to treat, so he told me to feed her as much as possible and pick up the meds Wednesday.

During some emailed discussions with my mother in law she suggested a cat specialist to see if he could confirm a diagnosis or make another recommendation. I found a place nearby that made the same diagnosis, but seemed more optimistic about treating her. So that's what I'm doing. I have three liquids to give her daily. She hates all three of them.

She's pretty much stopped eating. I've started trying to syringe feed her baby food, but she HATES that. So I broke out the big guns: I went to the grocery store and bought every canned fish/meat product I could find and will be tempting her with it over the next few days. I'm worried about it being too rich for her, though, so I'm going slow and mixing it with cat food. My first success this morning: anchovy. If she eats it again tonight, I'll start chopping it and mixing it in to the food to encourage her to eat more to get to the fishiness. The last time I got her to eat anything substantial was Tuesday night, and she won't touch those foods again. Here's hoping.

OMG Fatty's first ever caption contest!

noreply@blogger.com (Holly G) — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 04:08:00 +0000

I'm not feeling creative so I leave the caption to you. Winner gets... bragging rights. Sorry, folks, I can't afford lavish prizes =)

Poor Fatty

noreply@blogger.com (Holly G) — Wed, 04 Jun 2008 02:49:00 +0000

Proof that she's sick - her back turned on kitty treats. Her 16 years and fattiness finally caught up to her :-(

Fatty Kitteh

noreply@blogger.com (Holly G) — Thu, 22 May 2008 03:55:00 +0000

Wants spotlight back on her. Meow.

Guest Kitty Wizard!

noreply@blogger.com (Holly G) — Thu, 22 May 2008 03:54:00 +0000

This big boy was man of the house. He tolerated petting, but didn't seek out affection. And check out his extra toes!

Guest Kitty Gypsy!

noreply@blogger.com (Holly G) — Thu, 22 May 2008 03:51:00 +0000

Gypsy is a shy little (ok, big) lover. She escaped one day and explored her inner yard panther!

Guest Kitty Buffy!

noreply@blogger.com (Holly G) — Thu, 22 May 2008 03:49:00 +0000

This little girl (who is scandalously nekkid!) likes scratching, sleeping, and generally being lazy. She does NOT like hands or her face being touched.

Cougar kitty

noreply@blogger.com (Holly G) — Thu, 15 May 2008 03:55:00 +0000

Wishes to pounce on guest star.

OMG Fatty Guest Star!!

noreply@blogger.com (Holly G) — Wed, 14 May 2008 22:46:00 +0000

Introducing Felix P. Owen!

Don't judge me for loving mah mouse.

Spoiled kitteh

noreply@blogger.com (Holly G) — Sun, 11 May 2008 22:58:00 +0000

Moves in to the warm spot.

Lily inspection

noreply@blogger.com (Holly G) — Sun, 11 May 2008 22:57:00 +0000

Holly Inspection

noreply@blogger.com (Holly G) — Fri, 09 May 2008 03:21:00 +0000

Yoga cat

noreply@blogger.com (Holly G) — Fri, 09 May 2008 02:41:00 +0000

Practices spinal twist

Queen kitty

noreply@blogger.com (Holly G) — Mon, 05 May 2008 05:34:00 +0000

Claims blanket as throne.

Chic-fil-a

noreply@blogger.com (Holly G) — Fri, 02 May 2008 21:01:00 +0000

aka - kitty temptress

Scrapbook kitty

noreply@blogger.com (Holly G) — Fri, 02 May 2008 18:52:00 +0000

Still critical.

Going....

noreply@blogger.com (Holly G) — Fri, 02 May 2008 18:47:00 +0000

...going...

...going....

Gone!

Sleeping, part 1

noreply@blogger.com (Holly G) — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 02:26:00 +0000

The first in a series of sleeping pictures. What is it about the tail over the face that's so adorable?