OMG It's Luc!

My feet could shatter concrete

2011-05-09T22:03:00.000-07:00

So I've already told the world about my creepy stalker story in which I play the role of the stalker.

Well there have been some new developments. I'm too lazy to write it all out but here's the TL;DR:

We met on the internet and now it's semi-awkward whenever I see him and I try to say hello sometimes. Whatever. No biggie.

Well here's a story from tonight that I thought was rather amusing:

So I'm studying with my friend Alicia in her dorm's lounge right?

Alex is there right?

I'm terrified and my hands are shaking and my blood pressure is through the roof and I try my very hardest to ignore him and still make it look like I'm not some douche bag who doesn't say hello. It's plausible that I could have not seen him.

Fast forward a little bit. He's gone. I study some. I decide it's time to leave.

I'm walking out the door and I hear from behind me "HEY! [Stalkee's name]! So and so is looking for you..."

Not words nor science nor sheer determination of will could have you fathoming the force with which my feet propelled me out of that room.

I could have shattered concrete.

I hate my life.

I fell into temptation...

2011-05-09T14:12:00.000-07:00

I got a tumblr...

Don't judge.

Just accept it.

I'll still post here for larger and more important stories. But for right now my addiction has become Tumblr.

Oh internet you have forsaken me.

Check it out right here

Good friday. Earth Day. Today is good. Not.

2011-04-22T14:55:00.000-07:00

ALL MY FRIENDS HAVE LEFT ME FOREVER.

Just kidding, but I am alone this weekend because my friends went home for easter. I live 12 hours away so that's not exactly...pragmatic for me to be doing. So I'll just stay here in my dorm room all weekend doing absolutely nothing but studying and playing video games. HURRAY PRODUCTIVITY!

I posted a new YouTube video because I was bored. So you should probably watch it, I think. Unless you don't care about my life and you wish I wasn't alive. And then my only question is why are you reading my blog? Stop it. You know who you are.

Anyway.

I guess that's it for right now. Tweet me 'n stuff.

Oh and watch my new video. Here I'll even embed it for you.

You're welcome.

The College Grind: Cold Brewed Iced Coffee

2011-04-20T12:44:00.000-07:00

The College Grind: Cold Brewed Iced Coffee

Above is a link to my friend Anna Guiles' blog where she likes to post about her adventures throughout the land of Coffee. She really is obsessed. Follow her as she learns more and more about coffee every day, maybe you'll learn something yourself. I mean, coffee is the drink of the gods right?

Imma go have a latte.

I'm a youtuber now, does that make me famous?!

2011-04-14T21:30:00.000-07:00

I'm ready for my closeup! and stuff.

Yeah. I'm not really the most creative bean in the tool shed (best mixed metaphor ever) but I decided I wanna be a youtuber and be super awesome and drink awesome drinks and tell awesome stories and soak up each others' awesomeness.

Sorry. Had to.

Enjoy my video please.

Best Song Ever.

2011-04-05T16:13:00.000-07:00

Found this song yesterday thanks to a friend, and I'm terribly appalled that it doesn't have more than 1 million views yet. It's been out for 2 months and yet only 120,000 views? And Rebecca Black has millions of views? I'm offended.

Faith in humanity? What's that?

James Franco comes to UCSB

2011-04-03T14:14:00.000-07:00

James Franco came to UCSB on Friday for the premier showing of "Your Highness". Autographs were signed, hair was touched, hugs were given, and underwear was swung.

Yeah you heard me. James Franco came to UCSB and swung some girl's underwear over his head. It was hilarious. I even took some incriminating footage.

Rate, comment, whatever.

I also won a free ticket to see the show next weekend.

If you wanna know more about why James Franco was at UCSB check out the article about it on our daily newspaper The Nexus

That's it, pretty much.

Spring Break should NOT be boring. Or Cold. Mine is turning out to be both...

2011-03-22T14:25:00.000-07:00

The title says it all.

The only reason I'm even posting is because I'm bored, otherwise I'd leave you all without updates about my spring break because I'd be frolicking with my friends all over town. But my friends seem content to be by themselves this spring break, and get this, they've even decided to go on Vacation! I'm looking at you Anna G.

How dare they? Don't they know I'm sitting at home bored and waiting for their call? I'm not one to invite myself to do things with other people, but that's looking to be how things are going to turn out. I'm appalled.

Also: Fun fact. Due to this extreme boredom I've been experiencing over the last 3 days, I have become well acquainted with Reddit, and I've discovered that it's extremely addicting and I can't stop. EVER.

But I can stop any time I want to, really, it's my choice.

Now I have another thing to be addicted to...Stumbleupon, Facebook, Reddit. Oh god the list keeps getting longer. Pretty soon I'll never leave my computer.

Oh wait that's already happened.

Whatevs.

Finals are OVER! Also: Amtrak sucks.

2011-03-21T15:54:00.000-07:00

I'm back! Yes that's right; finals are over and I've returned to the blogosphere with renewed vigor! I've been working on the idea of starting a new blog that focuses on how incredibly geeky I am, hopefully posting news articles about geeky/sciency things and posting reviews for geeky/sciency things and generally just being geeky/scienc-y.... I don't really expect much to come of it, but I imagine it will at least be a fun thing to try out.

I'm writing this post on ~~an amtrak train~~ Hell on Earth. Where I will patiently be sitting for the next 12 hours of my life. Hurray. Woo. Fucking. Hoo.

I've done this 12 hour ride from Santa Barbara to Chico a few times now (8?...Maybe?) and it doesn't get any easier with each successive trip. In fact I'm fairly certain it gets progressively worse. The first few times it was like:

Me: “OMG I'M ON A TRAIN THIS IS COOL I LOVE THIS YAY I DON'T EVER WANT THIS TO ENDDDD WEEEEEEEEEEEE” (I might have actually “weeee”'d the first time I rode a train...don't judge me.)

However. After the 5^th time or so it became more of a:

Me: “HOLY SHIT KILL ME THIS IS WORSE THAN DEATH.”

Seriously.

We just got done with finals week (hence the unannounced hiatus) and studying for all 5 of my finals for 6 hours a day was not nearly as bad as this. I'm serious. No joke guys this is the worst thing I've ever experienced. And it keeps getting worse every time I do it.

Anyway, check out my new blog some time (I've already got it set up with a few recycled posts you might recognize from here that I deleted, more to come probably.)

Have fun, or whatever.

Fudge you multiple choice testing!

2011-02-28T10:21:00.000-08:00

I just took a chem midterm that was entirely multiple choice.

I hate multiple choice on science/mathematics tests, it makes it so that I need absolutely 100% the correct answer, regardless of the path that I took to get there.

On my tests last quarter that weren't I could have gotten the wrong answer, but the path to get there could have only had one error in it and I could have gotten at least half credit for the question.

This is not the case with this test. It's all or nothing. I was tempted to just not write anything down, just to spite the teachers, and the testing gods.

I hate my life.

On the bright side, this iced latte with soy milk is probably one of my new favorites.

That's not a very bright bright side. I fucking hate my life. Kill me.

There's nothing funny about this post. It's just sad.

[Edit] Just kidding, disregard this entire post, I got an A- and I feel better about life. All of it.

<3

I just can't even believe how Artsy I am right now.

2011-02-23T10:40:00.000-08:00

I just can't even believe how artsy me and my friends are, I mean look at us, wearing our jackets and holding our beverages in our pockets. Let them forever now be known as "beverage compartments". I'm just too speechless for words right now. Just. Wow. OMG.

Faggot.

2011-02-14T10:24:00.000-08:00

I don't understand, UCSB is supposed to be an institution of Higher Education not ignorance and bigoted speech. How can there be people who still use the words "faggot" and "that's so gay"?

So here's my story:

I was walking back from dinner with my friend Alicia, we had had a grand old time and I was still smiling because we were laughing so much, and I was walking past this great big group of people. Now, I thought nothing of this because I walk back big groups of people all the time, especially on a Friday night like it was. This time was a little different though, the people in this group were "uber-douchebags" as I like to call them. They were yelling and beating each other up and stuff and it was just a hot mess of testosterone that I wouldn't want to be a part of.

Anyway, I had passed them and I was pretty relieved they hadn't said anything to me, not that they would anyway, I was trying really hard to be anonymous, when I hear from behind me:

"I AIN'T NO GOD DAMNED FUCKING FAGGOT, I'M JUST A REGULAR PUSSY LOVING GUY"

First of all, great job objectifying women and insulting the gay community by implying that being gay is "abnormal". Now, I wouldn't have thought TOO much of this, except for the fact that all of his friends were laughing and jeering and being the biggest douchebags I've ever seen (that night).

All I secretly wanted to do was turn around and yell equally loudly:

HEY! I AM A GOD DAMNED FUCKING FAGGOT, YOU GOT A FUCKING PROBLEM WITH THAT?!

Now, this situation could go down one of two ways, the few girls they were with could have shut them up at that point and everything could have gone smoothly and I could have come away from that with my ego boosted and my head the size of Nantucket.

Or.

He could have beat the shit out of me as the rest of his friends watched.

I'm leaning towards that second one.

I hate people.

Party Culture and Why I Hate It.

2011-02-09T21:14:00.000-08:00

Here at UCSB there's something I like to call "party culture". Party culture is defined, by me, as the proliferation of everything party-related. It's the fact that a good 70-80% of the social interactions that occur here at UCSB revolve around partying, or exchanging party stories, or something similar.

Sitting here in the library, just listening to the people around me I can hear at least 3 groups talking about their weekends, or their plans for the weekend, and in 3 out of 3 of those groups, they're talking about getting completely fucked up and then going to a bunch of kickass parties to get more fucked up whereupon they will sleep with everything that moves and then they'll wake up and do it again on Saturday night...

Now, I realize that this is college and partying is going to be a pretty important part of socializing for the next 4 years, and I've realized that, from the very beginning coming into college, I was going to be surrounded by things that might make me a little uncomfortable. However, I was very willing and even excited to step outside of my comfort zone to find my inner college student. What I've found is completely the opposite. I'm completely unwilling to step outside of my comfort zone for any length of time, it makes me uncomfortable (maybe I'm missing something?...). I attribute this inability to step outside of my shell to my inability to relate to all of the partiers (read: Douchebags) who are EVERYWHERE.

I hate Party Culture, I hate the people that enjoy Party Culture, and I kind of abhor the mainstream social scene here in Santa Barbara, because it all focuses on partying. I don't even know if I can emphasize that enough.

Here let me say it again: EVERYTHING IS ABOUT PARTYING HERE.

I'm lucky enough to have found a good group of friends who are just about as disillusioned about the party scene as I am, but it's impossible for a small group of friends to shield you from an entire college worth of the disgusting, douche-y, bitchy, drunken messes that people are calling college students here, I mean seriously when do these people find time to study? Are they even studying?

I can't go 10 minutes without hearing somebody telling a story about how they slept with 3 guys in one night, and as interesting as that is, I don't really want to be hearing about it when I'm studying for my calculus midterm. I mean that's great, go you. But I don't really care. Also you're kinda gross. Also you're a slut. Also I hate you.

On top of all of this I have an intense phobia of normal social interaction.

I hate my life.

On the bright side my mother sent me this poster and I love it SOOOO much. Glee!!!

I still hate my life. Ugh.

Transfer?...

2011-02-07T12:36:00.000-08:00

So I'm quite honestly considering transferring schools. If I did it would be from UCSB (here) to UCD or Cal, hopefully Cal but more than likely UCD.

It's always been an option for me, but lately I've been realizing how optimal it would be for me to go to school in the Bay Area instead of way down here in southern California where I don't have any family or a stable social circle that I can absolutely depend on.

I've been having emotional breakdowns in between classes when thinking about it, and I have to wait until July for the winter quarter transfer application to open because I missed the fall transfer deadline (why is it so early? screw you UC's) which means that I'll be having emotional breakdowns for the next few months and completely freaking my shit every time I think about it.

I feel really bad about leaving all my friends behind that I've made here at UCSB, but it really would be more optimal for me to be living closer to home, especially considering the intense amount of homesickness and friendsickness I've been feeling as of late.

I must look like some sort of freak because I'm looking at my laptop with really sad eyes in the library and I'm certain somebody in this room thinks that I'm writing a suicide note or I'm emailing my Mom about the death of the family pet or something. I hate social relations.

On the bright side the newest Glee episode was A-MAZING and to make things better THERE'S ANOTHER ONE ON TUESDAY!!

I guess what I need to do right now is focus on getting the best grades I can, so I can optimize my chances of transfer...time to kick it into hyper-drive. Go.

ugh. Why is life so hard? Stop the world I wanna get off.

kthxbai. :(

Scooters? Really? Really?

2011-02-04T10:20:00.000-08:00

Really?

I thought it was just a fad at first, I thought it was just a few weirdos who decided it would be cool to ride around campus on FREAKING RAZOR SCOOTERS.

I was mistaken.

Over the past week I have been witness to over 20 ridiculous people (yes, I counted) riding ridiculous scooters everywhere (ridiculously).

It's bad enough that I almost get run over by a skateboarder every single day of my life, do I really need to add "looking at extremely stupid looking people" to the list of daily atrocities? I don't think so.

I mean, it might be okay of they actually..you know...extended the handle bars to a normal height. These people are riding around hunched over these scooters like geriatric old men clinging to some semblance of youth by trying to look "hip" except they don't know that scooters went out of style when I was...actually they were never really in style.

Furthermore they don't even go that much faster than me on their precious scooters! In exchange for getting to class 20 seconds before me they get intense back problems later in life. Congratulations!

I just heard someone in the Library shout: "LET'S PRAY NOW!!!"

I think the right hemisphere of my brain just exploded.

Please enjoy this Adam Lambert video while I go scrounge up the remainder of my faith in humanity.

Can I Get Arrested For This?

2011-01-29T19:53:00.000-08:00

...Ok. So here's my story...Don't judge me.

Did I tell you all about the French kid that I heard on the train going home? I didn't? Oh. Well there was this French kid who was sitting 2 seats in front of me on the train going home, and I heard him speaking French with one of his parents.

Well If you read my post about my paralyzing social phobia then you probably know where this story is going.

I was way too shy to actually talk to this kid like a normal person who was interested would. So I just kinda sat there and eavesdropped on all of his French conversations like a creeper and hoped that somehow he would realize that I was also French and that we should be friends.

This didn't happen.

So fast forward to now, I'm eating lunch with my friend Alicia and I see French kid seated at the table across from us and so I point him out to Alicia in a very non-creepy, I'm completely normal, way.

Me: "OMG DO YOU SEE THAT KID SITTING OVER THERE HE'S FRENCH OMG OMG OMFG"

And so Alicia looks and we discover that Alicia knows one of the people he was sitting with and of course the idea popped into my head that she should bridge the connection between the two of us, or at least find out his name so that I could find him on Facebook and find him like the not-creeper I am.

Well she did. She found his name. In fact, she even found out which room he lives in (he lives in her residence hall).

Well I got really excited about knowing his name so I went online and found him on Facebook COMPLETELY NORMAL RIGHT?!

I was disappointed to find that his profile was very private, and I couldn't add him because that would surpass the "creepyness" threshold that I'm willing to pass.

So, naturally, I asked somebody else to do it.

And they did.

Now, because we have a mutual friend, I am able to completely not-creepily scroll through his photos and his wall to try and figure out whether or not this person is gay or bisexual or something. My results? Asexual.

I have found absolutely no evidence of any sexual desire coming from this person at all, it's alarming.

However, in my mind Asexual = Gay. So...mission accomplished...?

DON'T JUDGE ME YOU KNOW YOU ALL DO IT TOO.

Can I be arrested for this...?....I think I'll stop now...Let normal social functioning commence!

I shall resolve to actually talk to this person (funny story, I accidentally got in his way once in the dining commons, and get this, I said SORRY, I know right? Exciting.) before the end of the quarter. I don't know how I'm going to do it, but I will I WILL DAMMIT!

He definitely knows I exist at least...I mean I stare at him all the time, that's normal right? That'll get him to want to talk to me right? Oh god...

Being normal is probably #1 on my list right now...I feel like such a creep. omg. help.

French Club Woes

2011-01-24T17:54:00.000-08:00

Failure at life is fail.

I quite literally just broke down and sat in the fetal position on my bed with the covers over me.

You see, internet, I have a problem. A few problems actually. My first, and arguably my most problematic problem (redundancy!), is that I have intense anxiety problems.

Doing anything that is a new experience for me is potentially debilitating, disrupting my every day life with bouts of panic attacks and seizures. Well, I've never had a seizure, but I'm sure it could happen. Even some things that I've done a million times before make my stomach feel like I've just eaten some boiling acid and concentrated pepper spray with a dash of nails (to taste).

Like this, but with acid and nails, and less hair.

My second problem is that the French club meets every Monday and I have nobody to go with, which is causing me anxiety. Intense anxiety. Hence the aforementioned breakdown.

Internet, I am stuck in a negative feedback loop. I have nobody to go to French club with, and the only way I'm going to French club is if I go with somebody, that somebody is most likely going to have to be French or speak French. The most likely place for me to find French speaking friends is, you guessed it, the French club.

Is that not a natural reaction?

I'm sure that if I actually go to the French club that I'll make a plethora of amazing friends and my world will be all smiles, rainbows and kittens, I'll meet my future beau and I'll be happy for the rest of my life. (Reasonable right?) However my body will not let me go anywhere near the club at 6:00PM on Mondays.

I'm going to go try and work up enough courage to go to the dining commons and eat dinner.

kthxbai.

I'm never wrong. Ever.

2011-01-19T23:41:00.000-08:00

Actually I was wrong once, it was that time I thought I made a mistake.

This blog post is in response to this video shown below.

I don't know about any of you, but I'm never wrong. Ever. In short: this video offends me.

Actually just kidding. I'm almost 60% sure that i'm 80% wrong 95% of the time. That's a lot of wrongness.

Take for example, today:

This man walks up to me (and my friend Chelsea) and asks us where the nearest parking structure is because he's misplaced his friends' car.

Now my first question to myself was "Why is this man accosting me? Make him go away." and my second question was "WTF how did you misplace your friends' car? First off you're a bad friend, and didn't you drive the thing here? How did you forget?"

My third question to myself was "HOLY SHIT WHY ARE YOUR EYES SO GOD DAMNED BLUE?!"

It was like the entire world had been made into a black and white movie solely so that it could accentuate the blueness of his eyes. It was like god made two sapphires colored the deepest blue he could fathom and inserted them into the eye sockets of this man, and then painted over them with more blue, then added some blue glitter just for good measure.

Stare into the abyss.

Naturally I stared at his eyes the entire time we were speaking, which either made me seem very trustworthy to this man, or very creepy. Probably the second one.

Anyway, Chelsea and I both stumbled all over ourselves trying to give him directions to the parking structure, and when he had gone on his merry way to find the car he lost for his friends, Chelsea and I looked at each other and decided that we had no idea where the Parking structure was in relation to us. We had probably lied to that poor man.

We had led this man astray. Completely astray. I'll be he's still looking. Probably.

What was the point of this?....

Oh yeah, I was wrong.

Actually now that I think about it, Chelsea was the wrong one, she led him astray.

I'm never wrong.

My life is Pretty Little Liars, but uglier.

2011-01-18T18:00:00.000-08:00

I love trashy television, especially if it involves a gaggle of girls getting all freaked out because someone sends them an anonymous text message and signs it "--A".

Wow that's oddly specific isn't it?

I don't know what it is about Pretty Little Liars, but it's so bad it's good. It's hilarious to watch because the characters and the plot is so laughably unbelievable that it's almost believable. I especially love the lesbians in the show. Hot, exotic, Asian girl and her smokin' Latina girlfriend? Um. Yes please.

I was watching this show while working out on an elliptical and I thought to myself:

Why isn't my life more like this? Why am I not having wondrously convoluted adventures involving murder and absolutely gorgeous guys? Why isn't everybody that I'm surrounded with completely gorgeous?

Seriously do people think this is realistic? Are there people watching this show because they think it's GOOD? I hope not, because they're probably really lonely people who think their lives suck because they're not surrounded by this... or this.... or this...

Seriously, these guys are too attractive to be alive. They should just stop. They're making the rest of us look bad. And ugly. And depressed. And ugly.

I'm going to go cut myself now...this is too depressing. I'm done. Done.

Also: New Hyperbole and a Half YAY!!!

Wow I hate rap but...

2011-01-18T12:30:00.000-08:00

Seriously this kid is good...

Seriously! Like what the hell? He's white.

I like to think that I'm somewhat of a YouTube buff, I know most of the celebrities (granted I don't subscribe to all of them, but still.) I'm always on the lookout for cool videos that haven't gone viral yet SO THAT I CAN SAY THAT I SAW THEM BEFORE THEY WENT VIRAL. Also so that I can post them on my blog and be a part of the reason that they go viral.

So here you go pale kid, here you go.

I'll take sole responsibility for this kid's eventual internet fame. You're welcome.

Also nice cat.

kthxbai.

OH MY GOD I FOUND THE FRENCH CLUB! THEY'VE BEEN HERE THE WHOLE TIME!

2011-01-17T19:38:00.000-08:00

I was walking through the University Center today after checking my mail for a care package from my darling mother, (it's been 4 months mom, I'm still waiting.) and I heard a snippet of French conversation going on somewhere amidst all of the white noise (this is a popular study/lounge area). Naturally I stopped dead in my tracks and like a deer in the headlights of a car I stared around the room doe-eyed for the cause of this wondrous sound.

I had finally found it. I was elated, ecstatic, exultant, and every other "e" word for happy. Sitting around in a circle were a copious amount of people (5) having a very natural conversation in French about politics or something. I wanted to run over and start blurting out every French word I've ever learned to impress them with my knowledge, however my instincts told me that this might be a good way to alienate myself and make them hate me forever. Instead, I reattained my composure and walked out of the room (I'm a busy man, I had things to do. [I was hungry.].

However, rest assured, I will be back next Monday to wreak havoc on the unsuspecting French club. I'll ravish them with my (ravishing) use of the French language. Dazzle them with my spectacular verb conjugation and correct usage of the plus que parfait verb tense. They won't know what hit them. They'll be so awed by my command of the French language that they'll promote me to discussion leader immediately upon arrival.

Actually I won't even have to arrive, I'm sure word of my amazingness has reached their ears already and they're trying to prepare for my arrival. No doubt they're preparing gifts for me to assuage my anger at having not known about their little club.

Let it be known that Lucien Raymond Gendrot III has found the UCSB French club, it had better prepare itself.

I Am Utterly Outraged. Utterly.

2011-01-16T16:08:00.000-08:00

I ate it anyway.

What is this? What is this abomination? I am offended beyond reasoning with. Not only do the dining commons seek to serve the freshman on this campus paltry excuses for food, they also have the audacity to call this...this thing a CROISSANT?!

Croissant means "crescent" people, not "cone". How dare they take all that is sacred and French and turn it into this?! What is this?! It's disgusting is what it is. I'm going to write a strongly worded letter to the dean..or the principle...or the directer of dining services, whoever handles this kind of thing!

How DARE they.

Regardless of its abomination I still ate it and it was delicious.

I must now go purge myself of the tainted croissant, that the Frenchman in me can always shine through.

Why Am I Not Constantly Partying?

2011-01-14T22:49:00.000-08:00

I am a failure as a college student.

Why do I not have plans to be out every weekend partying it up and hooking up with random people left and right?

Why do I not have anybody to *ahem* provide certain drinks of a non-nonalchoholic nature for me?

Why is life so evil to me? What did I do to deserve this? Is it because I stole that $5 bill from mom's purse when I was 15? (Sorry mom) Am I repenting for some kind of karmic debt that I'll have in the future? (Future Karma Exists. Look it up.)

4. Aagami Karma (Future Karma)
Aagami Karma is the Karmic Map that is coming, as a result of the merits and demerits of the present actions of your current birth. In other words, it is the portion of Karma that is created because of the actions in the present life and that will be added to your Sanchita Karma. If you fail to work off your debt, then more debts are added to Sanchita Karma and they become more Karmic Seeds and are served to you in more future lives.

So maybe somewhere in my future lives or my past lives I've done something to warrant the universe TOTALLY SCREWING ME OVER IN COLLEGE SOCIAL LIFE. It must have been something really awful, because this totally sucks.

From Very Demotivational

Dear Gods and Goddesses of the Universe:

I want this to be my college experience.

kthxbai.

I'm hopeless.

2011-01-14T10:39:00.000-08:00

I just sat in the library for 20 minutes watching a plethora of French music videos hoping that SOMEONE would walk up to me and comment on them. I wouldn't have even cared if they were French or not, I just want someone to notice that I am without me feeling the need to shout at them from across the room:

OH HAI YOU ALL THE WAY OVER THERE, HEY GUESS WHAT?! I'M FRENCH! YEAH! LOLOLOLOL I'M SO COOL.

I mean, I don't see the other French kid in my hall doing that, and everybody knows HE'S French. Of course, his name is Pierre so it's kind of obvious...BUT MY NAME IS LUCIEN FOR BUDDHA'S SAKE! I mean come on people, what act of Buddha will it take to get me to develop some kind of friendship with another French person?

I KNOW YOU'RE HERE FRENCH PEOPLE I HEAR YOU TALKING IN THE LIBRARY ALL THE TIME BUT I'M ALWAYS TOO BUSY OR SHY OR SCARED TO MAKE FRIENDS WITH YOU, APPROACH ME PLEASE.

I'm going to go alienate myself some more by watching some more French music videos.

kthxbai.

I know why I'm behind in school! It's so clear to me now!

2011-01-13T12:46:00.000-08:00

I can't focus on my school work because I'm too focused on creeping on other people! Why didn't it occur to me before? I'm so distracted by all the beautiful people around me that I have no time to study or function as a basic member of society.

One time (yesterday) I was in the library "reading" for my Chicana studies class and I kid you not I sat there scanning the room I was in every 5 seconds just to make sure that nobody super-attractive had walked in in the short amount of time since I last looked up. I must have read for a cumulative total of 10 minutes in the entire hour I was there at the library.

...
...
...

Oh sorry I'm writing this post in the library and I just got distracted by somebody...

I didn't say I was going to STOP. Sheesh, who do you take me for? A normal person? No.

My friend showed this to me the other day and I almost orgasmed all over her which would have been awkward, but I figured I should post about this.

No words are necessary.

Also, as is customary, I embarrassed myself in my lab class last night being pretentious again.

TA: Ok, you can get started on the lab now.

Me: *turning to the girl next to me* Wanna be lab partners?

Her: Sure! My name is Soleil.

Me: SOLEIL?!!?! LIKE THE WORD "SUN" IN FRENCH?!? OMG. *waving arms frantically*

Her: Yeah :) What's your name?

Me: LUC, LIKE THE FRENCH WAY.

Her: Oh that's cool, we both have French names.

*Period of silence as the TA says something*

Me: OMG OMG OMG OMG ARE YOUR PARENTS FRENCH?!!?!? ARE YOU FRENCH?!?!

Her: Oh...no...they just like the name I guess...

Me: oh...well...my dad is French....

Her: Oh....sorry....