On the Railway of Time

I Am Food I Eat Poetry

2017-05-19T06:02:00.001-07:00

Hello,

I know, I know... I have been all over the place since I stepped foot in Panama. Nevertheless, I haven't stopped writing. I started a new blog called Vie la Rosa, which was going to replace On the Railway of Time (no worries, it will always be me, no matter where I write). The bad news is Vie la Rosa was put on hold, due to circumstances beyond my control.

I still wanted to say hi, and tell you I have been thinking about writing a poetry book. Last July, I started a Facebook page called We ARt, where I share short poems and fragments of my thoughts along with pieces of ARt; a collage, a painting, or even a song. Not all the written work is mine, since I also share wisdom and knowledge from fellow writers and poets. However, I have been trying to post more of my own work to build my little library, so I have enough content to publish my dream poetry book.

Good news is I have written around 90 poems, and my goal is to reach 100. I would probably have to write a little over a hundred in order to choose only the best! Also I want to include some form of art, most likely drawn art or photos. That would be a whole different journey, and story of course.

P.S. I missed you more

Forever young, forever young,

For Now Is All I Have

2016-08-22T09:41:00.005-07:00

Dearest time traveler,

Hi again, it’s me; the already graduated me, the “grown up” me. I came back to Panama in late June and I have embarked in a journey of finding my-adult-self and what I truly love. The problem is I am in love with too many things. Though, I have mastered a thing or two, I still haven’t found the one thing I am completely okay doing for the rest of my life.

You, more than anyone, know I’m not okay with the typical nine-to-five job or sitting in front of a computer the whole day. I like moving around, making things more beautiful, taking pictures, and well, writing about them.

Recently, I read an article that said, one should pick something one is very good at, then work really hard on it. Then, I read something else that said, because one is good at doing more than one thing, how about combining all these things and create something that doesn’t exist. Hmm, what to believe?

I am smooth sailing and trial-and-erroring. I don’t know my destination yet, but I will make sure to enjoy the waters and the route to get there. For now is all I have.

Forever yours, forever young,

A Letter to the Best People I've Met at Penn State

2016-05-04T03:08:00.002-07:00

Dear you,

It doesn’t matter when we met. Maybe it was in our freshmen year, when we were both new at this thing called college. We were young, scared, and missed home like crazy, but we found in each other the fire to warm our hands during our first winter in State College. Or maybe, I met you somewhere in between, when you transferred from another campus, another college, or another country and destiny put us together in the same place at the right time. Perhaps, I met you last year and you have become the first person I call when something really great happens. You taught me that friendship doesn’t have a time tag.

Thank you is never enough for all the great moments we had and all the memories we built together. Thanks for everything that made our friendship grow lovelier and stronger every day ⎯ from the belly-hurting laughs, the jokes from class you and I only understood, the infamous all-nighters fueled by Starbucks iced caramel macchiatos, the coincidental encounters at the HUB filled with “Oh-my-Gods” and “I-haven’t-seen-you-in-forevers", the overflowing joy of seeing each other after summer vacations, the trips and adventures we took together (even if it only meant going to Walmart), to those nights we talked for hours and I realized wow, what an amazing human being I have in front of my eyes.

No matter where I go or who I become, know I will always carry you with me. You have shaped me into who I am today. I am after all, the sum of all the people I have met. So, even if we find ourselves separated by the vast oceans and the limitless sky; I, my dearest friend, will never say goodbye.

Forever yours, forever young,

Sadness

2016-01-31T17:20:00.001-08:00

Fill a bucket with your

tears and feed them to

the sea, watch them

crash against the

sand and fade away

from your feet.

Let the sunsets meet

the moon, let your wounds

be healed. Bathe away

your aching pains and see

them dance along

the winds.

Sail away to married

planets and latte

swirled skies. But don’t

forget to come back

home, my nectar

caramel child.

The Princess

2016-01-24T08:42:00.004-08:00

“Wake up your highness,

it’s already 8 A.M.”

She hears the water

tapping with its feet

and sinks into a creamy milk

bubble bath, infused with roses,

patchouli and dried peach.

She carefully detangles her red
velvet hair and swirls it up
into a ballerina bun.
She lifts her diamond kissed

tiara, looks in the mirror and says

"Maybe, I don't want

to be a princess anymore.

I don’t want crinoline dresses

or crystal shoes,

I don't want to ride pumpkins

or be friends with only books

I want to be a warrior, a soldier,

or just about anyone who

gets to wears boots."

She stares back into the mirror and

fixes her ballerina bun,

she looked perfect

but broken like a plastic doll.

She breathes in and walks down the aisle

and from the balcony,

waves to her people with a candid smile.

If only they knew she was

much more than that;

A sharp edged flower

and a delicate sword.

If they only understood she is

also human

made of stardust,

flesh and bone.

Collector of People

2016-01-02T20:01:00.001-08:00

One of my favorite sites is Elephant Journal because of its great content. They write about love, astrology, yoga, healthy eating and whatnot. My favorite section is the relationship section, which refers to all kinds of relationships, not only romantic ones. The reason I love it is because of its beautiful and powerful writing style. Articles speak to my soul and I feel deeply connected to the words, as if they were curated just for me.

The other day I stumbled upon an article called “The People Collector” (http://www.elephantjournal.com/2014/12/the-people-collector/) and I fell in love with it.

After reading this article, I told myself “you know what, maybe I am indeed a people collector”, but the idea of collecting people sounds terrible, right? It sounds as if people were objects you put behind a glass cabinet or like trophies, the more you have, the better or more popular. But, no. I see myself as a fanatic or a true collector. Take for example a butterfly collector, for him every new butterfly he adds to his collection is precious. Every new butterfly is a missing piece of the puzzle and that’s how I see people. People are the missing pieces of my life. Each person is valuable and has a special place in my chest. What makes them so different from objects, is that people teach us new things, make us feel all kinds of emotions, and have the ability to bring to light things that we didn't know existed within us. People transform us, modify us, and mold us. People are the pieces, the building blocks; We are the complete puzzle, the big picture.

As every everything we collect, there are the common backyard butterflies and the overly-repeated stickers for the World Cup album. And as much as we do not care about them, they still have a place in our collection. But there are also the limited editions and the very rare ones. The ones in a million, the ones we would give everything for, the ones we hold in a special place, the ones we wouldn’t trade for anything in the world.

And that’s life. We get our little packet of stickers and we never know what is inside. It is likely that we’ll get repeated stickers that no longer fit in our albums, but sometimes we are lucky enough to get the glittery/hologram special edition stickers, the ones we were waiting for all along.

____________________________________________________________________________________

2015 was the best year. I met and re-met beautiful people, who in no time became great friends. They are the reason I know that friendship (and relationships of any kind) doesn’t have a time tag. You see, there are people who you meet in one day and you just know. The way they speak, the way they battle their demons, the way they manage themselves through life and how they simply inspire you to be better, is pure magic. I learned you have to cherish these people like your most precious treasure because people like them are not easy to find.

I also learned that people will leave from your life, not because they are abandoning you, but because they are starting something new. It is a good-luck goodbye, a temporary goodbye, a goodbye that stings just a little because there is not doubt you will meet again. They will forever live and stay as long as you carry their love, their care, their stories and everything they have taught you. No matter how far apart you are, you will always have each other in mind and heart.

Dedicated to: Lina Azain, Hyder Alkhalifah, Isabelle Orozco, Ni Yang, Kahing Choi, Richie Buell, María Amalia Pérez, and Gian Tolin ~ people who have permanently marked my life and made 2015 an awesome year. They are, of course, my glittery special edition stickers.

**Never forget people will come and go, just a tiny few will manage to stay forever.

2015

2016-01-01T18:18:00.002-08:00

Dearest 2015,

Thank you for being so good. Thank you for being the best year so far. A year of new beginnings, new friendships and even sad goodbyes. A year of growth and getting to know myself better. A year where I learned to embrace and express my passions. 2014 taught me that gratitude and courage are MY main sources of happiness, this year I learned to put them into action.

I learned that I have to remind others how much they mean to me. I learned to not be afraid of my emotions; that it's okay to not be okay. I learned to be in peace with myself; no masks, no pretending, and no holding-backs. I learned that time means nothing when it comes to any kind of relationship. I learned from my mistakes and my triumphs, my friends and my enemies, and my teachers and my lovers. I learned that it's okay to not be entirely myself because I am, after all, the sum of all the people I have met.

Once again thank you 2015, for being the ultimate best.

P.S. 2016, please be good. Best of luck or may I say fate?

Sincerely,

D

Dancers

2015-12-10T11:53:00.000-08:00

It was our favorite night. Because we got to dance under the same stars and not feel estranged. Because there wasn't fog and smoke in the air. Because it was the first night we looked at each other in so long and accepted what we have, despite the traffic and the busy city lights. Because we know and still believe in a higher form of love, one that does not fade and sail away from the shores.

Art by Catrin Welz-Stein

Soulmates

2015-11-30T06:27:00.003-08:00

It doesn't take too long to realize someone is your soulmate. Soulmates aren't necessarily romantically involved or have known each other for many years. It just takes a simple and powerful connection; an art, a certain glitter and magic, you cannot explain.

Different from lovers, soulmates feel invulnerable and unbreakable with each other. Soulmates let their guards down; they are not scared of desynthesizing themselves and pouring their hearts over their hands as they speak. But the most beautiful thing of it all, soulmates cross the barriers of judgment, masks, and temporary films that only evil social norms create. It is only with true soulmates you are not afraid to be you, the person that only exists in the darkest hours and the corners of solitude.

And oh it feels good to be enchanted with empathy, to simply be understood.

Dedicated to my dearest friends Ni Yang and Hyder Alkhalifah ~ who I certainly met in my past life.

Letter to my ghosts

2015-11-28T22:52:00.001-08:00

Dear ghosts,

Today I thank you for making me stronger and more honest with myself. Thank you for showing me that there's beauty in risk and that time is irrelevant. Thank you for teaching me about hope, that friends don't give up on friends. Thank you for reminding me that now is all I have; that there is nothing I should regret and nothing I should change.

Thank you, even if our stars don't collide. Thank you one more time, even if it meant to let go or say goodbye.

forever grateful,

D.

MoMA | Museum of Modern Art ~ New York 2015

Twenty-two

2015-09-22T21:47:00.004-07:00

First things first. My phone decided to quit on my birthday and I couldn't get the chance to thank all the beautiful people who wished me a happy birthday through Whatsapp. If you are one of them, I just want to let you know it means a lot to me and thank you is not enough. Besides this technical issue, I had an amazing day.

I am grateful to another year of life and to all the people I have met here in State College. People who I'm lucky to call friends, people who have made college a little easier and people who have become my family; my home away from home. It is difficult to put in words the happiness I felt on my birthday. Being surrounded by such amazing people, made my heart warm and fuzzy. I really couldn't ask for better friends. They are the main reason I don't want college to ever end.

The FOODSTERS

Lina and Alex

Baby Ju

"Speech"

Happy birthday to me!

This sums up my happiness

Sup Hyder!

My one and only Ni

My boys, Gian and Richie

#roomielove

La Vie en Casco {14-8-15}

2015-08-27T06:08:00.001-07:00

Casco Viejo never ceases to surprise me. This time I went with my lovely friend Karina.

Ramblings of a Lost Traveler

2015-07-01T20:51:00.003-07:00

Should I count the stars or the infinite grains of sand? How many drops of water could the Seine River have? Prague, Budapest or Vienna? Cambodia, Malaysia or Vietnam? Where will this wind sweep off my feet?

If only my soul could stay in one place, where in this world could that ever be?

Far away in the Himalayan Mountains, where I can brew myself some Jasmine tea, or near the crystalline waters of the Caribbean or the Mediterranean Sea? Would I rather ride elephants in Thailand or in India? Would I rather sail along great whales or jeep-race against cheetahs? Would I rather eat in New Orleans some oysters and fluffy beignets or in Greece, some tzatziki, olives and a side-order of pita? Would I rather shop in Champs Elysees or in some Turkish bazaar? Would I rather be called crazy, extravagant or bizarre?

Too many choices and one life to live, but if I choose wisely, one is all I need.

The Sad Sea Waves #IWTFY

2015-07-01T20:13:00.003-07:00

When I look at you, I can see the person you used to be drowning in the person you are. And it makes me nostalgic and sad because I know when you look at me, you must see the same thing.

~I Wrote This for You

I DO NOT OWN THE IMAGE

Be You

2015-06-24T10:42:00.002-07:00

"Always be a first rate version of yourself"

"Be you and only you"

"Don't try to be someone else"

I say no.

You are the sum of every person you have met. You are the sum of all the emotions they have printed in your heart. You are their lessons and what they teach, a fanatic or a rebel of what they preach. They are the seeds and you are the plant. They are the sun, the rain and the working hands.

I say yes.

You are one of a kind; the perfect concoction of every soul your life has drawn.

You are the beautiful mélange of your father and your mother, your sister, your brother, your friends, your enemies and every angel and demon your God has sent.

In a world where "I" has become the most important figure; be humble, be caring, be kind.

To my dearest friend

2015-04-24T08:01:00.004-07:00

Thank you.

For being that constant reminder that I am the best I could ever be. Because you love me with flaws, thorns and everything sweet in between. Because you protect me and do not want to see me get hurt, but I know that if I fall, you'll be there to heal my wounds. Because you listen to my happy and sometimes broken soul and tune it back when it loses a string or two. Because, you remember how we met each other and how there was no room for coincidence. Because we met each other in the hands of destiny and fate.

Because even if one day we find ourselves separated by the vast oceans and the limitless sky; my heart, dearest friend, will never say goodbye.

I DO NOT OWN THE IMAGE






















Dedicated to Viola Du, Juan Mogoginta, Hilaria Rodriguez and you.

Golden Treasures of Pride and Strength

2015-04-13T15:51:00.001-07:00

To the go-getter and adventure-seeker, to the one who never gives up, to the one I believe in the most, to the one who loves with no boundaries. This is for you, because to me, you are the reason I write and expose my vulnerable, yet grateful heart:

Hope for the best, trust the milky currents of the galaxy and destiny itself and live day by day. Say what you need to say, say what your chest can no longer contain. It takes oceans of courage and small drops of insanity to lung out the words simmering in your blood. Remember that every time you lose, you win. You win golden treasures of pride and strength.

Hear what your heart says and what your stubborn head is trying to stop. I beg you to take care of that kind heart of yours. It is your heart you need to defend, it is your heart that will bring you true joy. The heart can sometimes be fragile, but promise me that if for any reason it finds itself a little shattered, you will pick up the pieces and glue them back together with sticky sweet love.

I believe in you.

Forever yours, forever young,

I DO NOT OWN THE IMAGE

For You I Do it All

2015-03-28T14:24:00.003-07:00

Boiling lava pumps out from the heart, vein to vein, rushing through the muscles like a restless train. Violent waves of uncharming thoughts fill your head, as electric currents of pure negativity cook in the waters of despair. Every breath becomes heavier and shorter, as if a cloud of smog invaded the lungs. The desynchronized rhythm of what lies behind your chest slowly deteriorates your humble brain. You're drowning in the mess of your rushing and trepid soul. But don't be scared of this insensitive world. Hold my hand and I will never let you go.

As for you, I do it all.

I will kill the devil inside you,

I will stand here with my shield to fight restless Fear,

I will dry the tears rolling down your peach and perfect cheeks,

I promise you the stars, the universe and all the infinities above,

Courage is my name and for you, I do it all.

I DO NOT OWN THE IMAGE

Away, away and away

2015-02-22T07:12:00.001-08:00

Why do you go away? So that you can come back. So that you can see the place you came from with new eyes and extra colors. And the people there see you differently, too. Coming back to where you started is not the same as never leaving.

~Terry Pratchett

I DO NOT OWN THE IMAGE

The Kingdom of Us

2015-02-21T22:11:00.000-08:00

In the kingdom of Us, two heroes live: one was raised a prince and the other was raised a peasant. When the prince turned one, the king and the queen finally decided to invite the whole village of I to welcome the future king. No one ever questioned what took them three hundred and sixty-five moons to prepare this great event. Instead, they wondered what kind of heavenly foods they would serve in the banquet, how many pounds of gold could have cost the dress of the queen and how many cups of wine they would clink in honor of the baby. In the end, none of these things really mattered, as the infinite happiness and warmth of everyone united was vast enough to dismiss from the mind any unkind thought.

When the queen held the prince in the air, everyone’s heart stopped for a second and stood in awe before the precious boy. They were mesmerized by his fairness; dewy rosy cheeks, gold-weaved locks and hypnotizing royal blue eyes. Even if he was only a mere child, Usnians already felt safe in his arms and wholeheartedly gave him their trust. From that day, Us knew their future king would be successful. Their guts did not fail.

The prince grew into the love of his people and even today he is acclaimed and applauded for his grand deeds. He willingly stands up for his kingdom and never will he dare to take no for an answer. He is not afraid of using his sword and shield to fight against evil-minded spirits. Bravery, as we all know him, always thirsts for new adventures and accepts them with overflowing enthusiasm.

Now let’s go back to the beginning.

Why then, did the king and the queen take so long to welcome precious Bravery?

When the queen gave birth, not only Bravery was born. For everyone’s surprise, two identical babies were born. And such was their resemblance that no one could discern the difference between the two. It took many sunrises and sleep-deprived nights for the queen and the king to decide on their names. Names that would carry glory, move mountains and leave the earth stained until infinity. Bravery’s twin brother was named Courage.

The kings of Us felt complete. Not even heaven or the cosmic currents of the universe could take away their joy. But one cloudless night, where silence and peace appeared to encompass the whole earth, the crescent moon and the seven seas, something terrible happened.

Us is haunted by a millenary demon that goes by the name of Fear. It terrorizes every street and corner of every artery and vein. It swallows the souls of those who believe they are weak and remain in the shadows, to avoid discomfort and shame. Even before the birth of the twins, Fear knew that Courage would be his undoing. It was written in the stars and near the salty waters, in every grain of sand.

That cloudless night, the evil demon crept into the room where the twins were peacefully sleeping. The air felt heavy and intoxicating, as if a plague had infested the whole kingdom. Fear took away Courage in his skinless arms and vanished in the darkness, the way clouds and fog collide at dawn.

The morning was quiet and grey; not the birds dared to sing, not the sun had the strength to shine. Only the soft and cold cry from the clouds could be heard. The queen joined the clouds with gentle sobs and pouring tears and let herself fall to the ground so delicately, like a feather. The night swept the kingdom and Morpheus whispered to the queen “Be strong”. And so the queen fell asleep with an aching heart, yet a hopeful soul.

Courage grew under the wings of Fear, cuffed in the chains of terror and confined to live in endless nights. He knew nothing, but darkness and despair. Fear deprived him from his identity, his family, his throne and the kingdom of Us, the most powerful and puissant kingdom of them all. But, little did Fear know about the power of love. Courage’s mother planted in him a seed of hope, a seed that would grow strong until the flowers of freedom bloomed in ecstasy.

Even if Courage feared Fear with all his life, that little seed of hope armed him with valor to finally confront his greatest enemy. He broke himself from the chains with the unbelievable strength of Goliath, injured Fear with a single touch and made his great escape from the dungeon of darkness.

Courage never knew about his family.

Bravery never knew he had a twin brother.

The mother never lost hope of her boy being alive.

In the kingdom of Us, two heroes live. One is Bravery: the valiant, the adventurous and the never-afraid. The one that everyone acclaims and never takes no for an answer. The other one is Courage, the silent hero that only appears when the moon shines. The hopeful and sometimes scared soul that fights with no rest to vanquish Fear.

And so the question arises, who is your favorite hero?

En el Casco la vida es más sabrosa {9-1-15}

2015-01-10T16:21:00.001-08:00

Identity

2014-10-25T22:18:00.002-07:00

“Stop worrying about your identity and concern yourself with the people you care about, ideas that matter to you, beliefs you can stand by, tickets you can run on. Intelligent humans make those choices with their brain and hearts and they make them alone. The world does not deliver meaning to you. You have to make it meaningful…and decide what you want and need and must do. It’s a tough, unimaginably lonely and complicated way to be in the world. But that’s the deal: you have to live; you can’t live by slogans, dead ideas, clichés, or national flags. Finding an identity is easy. It’s the easy way out.”

~Zaddie Smith, On Beauty

I DO NOT OWN THE IMAGE

Coping

2014-10-04T08:43:00.002-07:00

Hello dearest time travelers,

Welcome to another year of college by my side {even if you are screens and miles away from me}. Sweet summer sugar-rushed through the days and Junior year started to silently sink into my skin. Now I can finally say: "I am half way there".

Many things have changed, since I have gotten here. Strength, courage, gratefulness {and you} have kept me going. I still don't know if these little life modifications were made for better or for worse, but I courageously {not bravely} welcome them. You see, to embrace change is to embrace growth. So here's to another year of school and another bag full of confetti, surprises and whatnots.

Come hit me with your best shot.

-Dorianne

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Maybe you asked yourself why "..I courageously {not bravely} welcome them." Don't worry, you will know about it soon. My next post will answer all your queries. For now, I will leave you with a short introduction.

You are not the Scarecrow, you have a brain. You are not the Tin Man, you have a heart. You are the Cowardly Lion, only if you let thyself be one. And you ask me, how do I know if I have courage? Where in this anthropomorphic celestial body can I find it? Would it be running through my veins along with the ever-changing red blood cells? Is it a temporary visitor in the lungs, just as the oxygen we inhale? Maybe it’s got wings like the butterflies in our stomachs or plays hide-and-seek under the arches of our feet. For all I know, Courage lives in Us and it is indeed part of our complex anatomy. He is the silent savior of the city of Us {please do not confuse it with Oz}. He is like Batman in Gotham City and his Joker, the abominable Fear.

An Introduction's Story

2014-07-30T11:47:00.001-07:00

Yesterday, right before the clock struck midnight, I was thinking about writing something very special. I fell asleep with the thought of you in my head and from that moment, I knew I had to write this. I was looking for the right sentences to start this short introduction, but all the words known in the library of my brain were not enough to describe the entangled truth residing in my heart. It seems to me that my heart speaks a foreign language, my brain does not know of {but even if they do not understand each other quite well, I still believe they are star-crossed soul mates}.

I wanted this introduction to be shocking, yet kind and polite. I wanted it to provoke fire, ice and everything in between. I wanted it to be yours and only yours to keep. And just like a desperate child or a coy girl playing hard to get, the only thing I truly want {now and forever} is to be the conqueror of your attention.

Yours now and forever,

I DO NOT OWN THE IMAGE

Seasons' Greetings

2014-07-25T09:09:00.000-07:00

This is not about being gentle, but fierce and fervent. Candid, never unkind; mind awakening and sharp {to the point it hurts no more than a harmless bee sting in the midst of spring}.

The dog days are over. The dog days are done. Wake up, wake up! It may be summer in your brain, but not in your heart. It’s beating and begging to shed its rust-colored leaves because autumn, my love, is already here.

All I ask you is to not fear change. Change is vital for the season of flowers, bloom and growth. Change is constant, like the ceaseless tides of the ocean that roar to the moon and silently crash against the soft sand. Change is welcoming winter and its frigid storms, without ever succumbing to its cotton white fur {hold on tight dear, there is no chilly soul that cannot be fixed with a hot cup of time}.

Let the sun eternally shine and wash away with warmth every season of thy life.

I DO NOT OWN THE IMAGE