On the Road to a New Me

KISS Me!

2012-09-24T06:45:00.001-07:00

Ok.. not in that sense, but HEY.. whatever works! Keep It Simple, Stupid. That's the route I'm taking. Back to the basics of food and fitness. If there's one thing I've learned in my journey, it's that you never really fail unless you completely give up. Sometimes it takes stepping back for a minute and putting things back in order, but that's not failing. In fact some of the most successful people in the world have had to take a step back.. take a break.. re-evaluate. This is a lifelong journey to become healthier and stay that way. It won't ALWAYS be smooth sailing, because.. well.. that's life! So, now that I've taken my step back and am back into full fledged 'Revolution' mode.. I've decided to try and not overthink things too much. Keeping it simple. I've said it before, but the very basics of food and workout were once laid out for me so plain and simple so that I could understand it, "Don't Eat $h!% and Move Your @$$"! So I am! And I'm LOVING it! I've got about 5 weeks worth of REGULAR, CONSISTENT and good "FAT BURNING" workouts under my belt and two and a half weeks of a new "wheat free" eating style I'm trying. Notice I say "eating style"? Why? Because I despise the word "DIET". BLEH! Who wants to be on a diet for the rest of their cotton pickin life??

I'm Not As Good As I Once Was
If you've ever made it to the gym for any amount of time, slacked off for even a couple of weeks, then try to pick up where you left off; you'll be able to sympathize with me. If you haven't gone to the gym ever and decided to do a workout class for the first time since you were in your teens.. you'll be able to sympathize with me. After I was able to get all of my ducks in a row, the first thing I did was call my trainer. I was feeling so sluggish and gross. Nothing has been fitting right, I lacked the energy I once had, and most importantly.. I was uncomfortable in my own skin. I was not feeling fantastic at all. So, I met with my trainer and guess what happened. I sucked eggs. Workouts that I had been used to doing were kicking my butt! I know to get a good workout, I have to get to that stage where I am a little out of my comfort zone.. heavy breathing.. sweating. Not exactly a great feeling from being able to do these workouts to sucking wind like I'm dying! It was very humbling. No.. maybe humbling isn't the word.. more like EMBARASSING! I asked my trainer several times.. "I'm sucking huh?" He was nice enough to tell me that I was doing good. I'm glad.. I need that positive reinforcement. So after a couple of weeks of slugging through my workouts and still not feeling at the top of my game, I knew I still wasn't quite right. I made a very important step in making my way back to the workout arena and that was to get my but in gear and make it a habit again of going to the gym, but I still had some 'tweeking' to do.

No Wheat? NO WAY!
It's no secret that I've never been a fan of fad diets. There's that damn word again. :-/ I've heard all about the Atkin's Diet, South Beach Diet, Low Carb this, Cheat Day that, etc, etc, etc. I am a working mom with two young kids. It really does not work for me to have these books that give me strict guidelines and planned meals that include ingredients like broccoli sprouts and kale. (Funny thing is.. broccoli sprouts and kale are actually pretty delicious foods! LOL!) Or recipes with 6984375984 different ingredients. My kids and I are still (and may always be) trying to find our groove. School has started full swing, in a few weeks I'm starting another Zumba camp; so I have to find things that work with our busy schedules. I am reading a book which talks about breaking away from processed foods and eating lean meats, fruits, and vegetables. Now.. I understand that any ol' dummy can write a health book.. or write a blog.............. -__- But I am very interested in what the book "Wheat Belly" has to say. If you are interested in finding out all the ins and outs of the book please feel free to read it, but I'm going to stick to the basics here. It all comes back to eliminating as many processed foods in your diet as possible.. and more to the point, completely. It can be challenging, but I find that it's only challenging when I start to over think it. My diet.. stupid word.. these days consists of eggs, fresh veggies (broccoli, bell pepper, cauliflower, carrots, celery), fruits, nuts, chicken, fish, and turkey. Wow.. a new concept.. I know. o.O But believe it or not.. after all that I've read, researched, learned, I FORGOT! GAH! So.. here I am.. back to basics and using the KISS method! :) Thursday will mark the third week that I have eliminated all processed foods from my diet and have eaten only fresh fruits, veggies, and lean meats. I went through some changes, I may or may not have been a little grumpy in the first few days. :) But in this third week especially, I find that I don't crave the junk like I used to. When I was on "vacation", I constantly craved the crap! The more crap I ate.. the more I HAD to have it! Like a DRUG! I understand there are people in the world who have no problem eating "Raw" diets or Vegan Diets or Paleo Diets.. I always felt that wasn't for me. But here I am telling you that I am thoroughly enjoying my new eating style. It's like finding myself again! I have energy, I feel great, and I don't feel weighed down! I would recommend to anyone, even my own bestest good friend.. before you try a new "diet" I encourage you to read, read, read. Don't dive into something without first knowing the consequences and if this will even be healthy for YOU. Everyone is different.. your results will not be exactly the same as others.

I am so grateful for the encouragement from friends and family.. for those not ridiculing me for taking my vacation. I am proud to announce that I am 9 pounds lighter than I was two and a half weeks ago! I am back on board and I hope you are too! Until next time! ;)

They Call Me the Comeback Kid

2012-09-11T20:46:00.001-07:00

Whew! It sure is dusty around here! A few cobwebs in the corners.. hmm.. I guess that's what happens when you take a little break! ;) This blog has always been about one thing.. weight loss and my journey to achieve my weight loss/healthy lifestyle goal. But today, I have to step out of those lines just slightly so that you can understand. Two years ago, everything changed in my life. Wow.. where did the time go? It's been a while.. so pardon me while I find my groove. 'K.. back on track. Two years ago, everything in my life changed.. then changed again.. then changed AGAIN. I chased my dream of becoming, not only self employed, but self employed by doing something I became so passionate about. I left my great, full time job to become a full time Personal Trainer and Zumba Instructor Extraordinaire!!! ((**JAZZ HANDS** )) It has been a roller coaster and I will try to give you the Cliff's notes version and not the Lifetime Movie. :)

NEVER LET 'EM SEE YOU CRY
I had that much faith in myself, in what I was about, and in God that I could do this and that with a little hard work and budgeting, I would be successful.   In my last entry early this year, I touched on going through a divorce and trying to make a go at this new career as a single mom and sole provider. I was depressed.. no matter how much I tried to deny it.. it was there. I tried desperately to put on a happy face, put on my big girl panties and go forth "as if".. as if everything would come out ok. I truly believe positivity plays a big part in where we end up in life. I had to stay positive for my kids, my business, and well for my own sanity. So, in this journey of building my career and I continued to workout at the gym, I taught as many Zumba classes as I could fit into one week's time, I trained my clients, I researched, marketed, worried, prayed, cried, and prayed some more. I not only was over working my body, but my mind and my spirit as well.. mix that with not getting proper nutrition. I felt horrible 90% of the time. I tried to shake things off, but that usually ended up with me beating myself up BECAUSE I felt awful. I had hit complete exhaustion. Mind, Body, and Soul. My body was rebelling against me.. My workouts weren't as fruitful.. which made me feel less than.. which led to more bashing of myself. I gained weight.. more bashing. I was embarrassed. In my attempts to market my studio, I put an advertisement on my windshield.. I constantly marketed my Zumba.. I was always "on". Who knows.. maybe no one gave a rat's "batooty" about me, but in my mind everyone was watching me fall apart and gain weight.

YOU CAN DO ANYTHING, BUT NOT EVERYTHING
A few months after my last blog entry, I had decided that I was going to give myself a break. That I wouldn't beat myself up if there was dust on my tennis shoes. So what, if I didn't workout more than once that week because I was taking my kids on date night or karate or just needed a break from the hustle and bustle. I had no interest in becoming obese and neglecting everything that I learned along the way. I still worked out, just not quite as religiously. I was still somewhat mindful of what I ate, but I didn't obsess over it. I was on vacation. I allowed myself some reprieve. I didn't know when I was going to "come back from vacation".. but all I know is that I finally felt free.. it felt great to not beat myself up over every calorie that went into my mouth. Please understand though, I didn't feel as fantastic physically as I did when I ate well, but my spirit was free. I had to do this for myself. I had to stop beating myself up over everything in my life INCLUDING my eating habits and weight gain.

MY SOUL HAS HEALED AND VACATION IS OVER
I have been blessed enough to go back to the job I left in the same exact capacity.. as if I never left. Only I did.. and my soul was better for it. I was back in a routine with schedules laid out for me daily. This is good for me. A few weeks ago I called my trainer (and friend) that I had always had and helped me through more than even he is probably aware of. I feel like a baby learning how to walk. I did NOT gain all of my weight back (THANK GOD), but it was enough to make a difference. I was on vacation.. frolicking and not beating myself up.. but there came a point where I wasn't comfortable in my own skin. THAT was the turning point to "come home". I started out by getting my workouts going.. then turned on what I know (and then some) about my nutrition. I have been eating very well and I am already feeling so good. It's like detoxing.. Just have to get past the threshold then my body won't crave the crap. I'm finally REALLY excited to be back on this journey. I still train, teach zumba, and work full time. I still find time to be with my kids. I don't over commit myself. I want desperately to get my body where it was 2 years ago and then some, but I've tried to stop putting the pressure on myself (and it's still a struggle.. old habits die hard). I have some really great friends, family, and clients who've become friends.   I've gone on long enough and I will update you next week on my journey of this new eating style I'm trying. It's great for your body, but it can get challenging! I may have stumbled, but I have not fallen.. and THAT's why they call me the Comeback Kid! BOOYAH!! ;)

The Low Down, Dirty Truth

2012-02-20T09:22:00.000-08:00

Yep. Time to get real. I began this blog a few years ago to tell of the ups and downs of my journey. I was steamrolling my way through it quite nicely, too; until about a year and a half ago, that is. I'd post every now and then about trying to motivate myself and what I had been doing to stay motivated even if it were in just two week increments. I've had so many people telling me for quite sometime how inspiring and motivating I am. I try so hard to believe that, but it's intimidating! LoL! I put myself out there for people to keep a critical eye on me.. but I did it ALL for accountability to myself. Do you know how scary it is to be "on stage" all the time?? So.. instead of ruining something that kept people motivated and inspired, I would avoid posting blogs so much (and yes, probably a little bit of fear of being judged. Since I'm being honest here) . The truth is that since late 2010 I've had a lot more downs than ups regarding my journey. So by avoiding, I lost my accountability to myself. I was enjoying my new lifestyle so well and felt SO passionately about it that in November 2010 I decided to quit my full time job and become a personal trainer. A decision I do NOT regret and profession that I DEARLY love doing! Just two short weeks later, I separated from my husband. I will spare you details of my divorce and the struggles of being a single mom and trying to make a go of my new career. That's not what this blog is about.. this blog is and always has been about my weight loss journey. As you can imagine, there are many emotional ups and down of divorce alone.. add the pressure of being the sole provider for your family to that.. well.. you can see where I'm going here. I admitted LONG ago that I'm an emotional eater. These are all the perfect ingredients for weight gain and loss of motivation.

"When you feel like giving up, remember why you held on for so long in the first place."

Before you start having visions of me laying on the couch with a gallon of ice cream and an economy size bag of Doritos each night or running through fast food drive thru's every chance I got.. I AM proud to share with you that I did NOT give up on my fight. I taught Zumba, on average, 3 times a week and worked out with my own trainer a couple times a week. I would still start out every week with the INTENTIONS of making great choices each and every day, only to find myself giving in to temptations or cravings.. telling myself.. "just one last time of chocolate before I (fill in the blank)" or my all time favorite "I haven't had (fill in the blank) in SOOOO LONG!" Well.. with all that working out you'd THINK I'd still lose or even maintain. Think again. It's a known fact that exercise is only 10% of fat loss.. that leaves the other 90% to nutrition. Over the last 17ish months I have gone up 2 pant sizes. There are two big things I want to point out here. First..Vanity.. I am no longer happy in my own skin. Although I'd never in my life wore a bikini nor felt the need to.. I was very happy where I was and felt comfortable putting on a swim suit without wearing a tent over it. I felt great wearing shorts that weren't to my knees with tank tops. While it's not the end of the world and I haven't gone back to where I began.. I am not comfortable with me. THAT is what's important. Not what magazines or society thinks I should be like.. but what I WANT for myself. Second.. Health.. I do NOT feel as good as I did before. When I was eating good 95% of the time I felt GREAT! I had energy. I felt clean inside. I thought clearly. These days I feel dragged down, unmotivated, and lethargic. I think Kate Moss once said "Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels".. well my friends.. that poor little toothpick has it all wrong. Nothing tastes as good as being HEALTHY feels!

"When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on"

So.. instead of making promises or trying to give tips to keep myself motivated, I'm just going to get real again. We are coming up on Lent to which I have decided to give up alcohol. I am a social drinker and I have been trying to socialize a lot lately. It just comes with the 'trying to find a life' territory, but it has, no doubt, contributed to my weight gain. I am also giving up chocolate for Lenten. I miiiight be a chocoholic. ;) And yes.. I do love the taste of it, but it does give me a "feel good" feeling.. an indulgence that makes me feel like I'm giving myself a special savory treat. I don't feel this way about lemon cake or sugar cookies.. just chocolate. LOL! Sick! I know! This isn't really about giving it up for fat loss as much as giving up something that I've sort of leaned on for comfort with hopefully the benefits of fat loss and also gaining the spiritual and physical cleansing that I NEED!

Anyway.. it's back to baby steps! I am so grateful to have had the last year or so to recover emotionally, but I feel as if I've revert back a year physically. I'm not making promises I can't keep.. just starting over. Anyone who wants to join me.. PLEASE.. SAY SO! My first goal is to be accountable. My goal is to blog every month as I did beginning.. and maybe MORE!! (But no promises on the "more" statement! lol!) Thank you ALL for the encouragement I've had since the beginning of my journey. I hope to continue to inspire and motivate you all to not give up on your fight, no matter what little battles you might lose.

How Tina Got her Groove Back

2011-09-12T08:39:00.000-07:00

In case you haven't noticed.. I've been on hiatus for the past few months. This year has been a year of BIG changes in my life. I've sat down to update my blog a couple of times, but just couldn't. I wasn't feeling very inspired. I haven't felt myself in a really long time. Today, I am inspired and I am happy to report that through some of these huge curve balls and life changes that have come my way, I have maintained my weight! YAY! Considering I'm an emotional eater, I'd say that's pretty good. To be honest it's been almost a year since I've seen any real results on the scale, however I have seen changes in my physique and clothing size. I am beginning to feel like me again. I'm inspired, excited, and have set some goals for myself. I'm in a much better place than I was a year ago. Did I just say a YEAR?!?!?! My MY how time flies!! But have no fear.. I found my groove again. I feel it deep down in my soul! ;-)

You are What You EAT
How many times have we heard this saying? With emotions running amuck (who says "amuck"?) and trying to be Super Mom all at the same time, my eating habits started slipping here and there and before I knew it most days out of the week I'd have at least ONE crappy meal or "snack". I'm not proud of it and honestly HATE telling you about it. But I'm real. It happens. No one is perfect. We all have our moments or seasons. I'm just very grateful for some very wonderful people in my life. I have been able to lean on them instead of food. Junk food makes me feel guilty, nasty, jiggly, lazy, tired, like a slob. The people who have recently come into my life not only have been there for me to lean on, but we share an interest in healthy living. It reminded me of who I am.. it brought me back to what I know makes me feel good in every way. I've found my confidence again. I'm not hiding in my kitchen eating the very crap that I wouldn't feed my children. I feel WONDERFUL! It didn't take 6 weeks of eating rice cakes and bean sprouts to make me feel energized and alert again. It took like 1 stinkin DAY! Heatlhy eating and drinking plenty of water makes you almost euphoric. It gives me a clear mind, wonderful energy, and peace. Is it all these special foods that provide it? Maybe yes.. maybe no. But what I do know is that by making choices that I know are good for me, I not only have the energy to get a GREAT workout.. but I don't have the guilt, and the lazy, and the bloated feelings. I feel light on my feet. Like a butterfly! Watch out Mike Tyson! ;-)

I Like to Move It MOVE IT!
One thing that never changed was my physical activity. I'm still teaching Zumba three times a week and I still go to my trainer. The difference is, my workouts weren't near as productive because of what I was eating. Sure.. I was going through the motions and it wasn't awful. But I didn't get those wonderful cleansing workouts because my body was lacking the energy to do any real output. I can completely tell a difference in myself during my Zumba classes and my independent workouts. My mind is "with it" and I don't feel like I weigh a TON while doing it! Nutrition is 90% of fat loss. Let me just say that again. NUTRITION IS 90% OF FAT LOSS. Why?? Because it's not just something you fill your belly with so that you don't die.. it's FUEL! It fuels your mind and your body! Without that.. why even put forth the effort to exercise? You're not going to get what you need out of it. A very wise man told me "Don't eat $h!t and move your @$$".. the more I learn the more I understand just how equally important those two things are.. one feeds the other.

A new challenge has been presented to me and it is one that I'm very excited to take. I have until Christmas to lose another 15 pounds. I'm pretty flippin excited about this! It really got my motor running! I may not be 100%.. but I'm bringing my "A" game and baby I'm AAAAAALMOST there. ;-) Who's ready to challenge themselves???? GAME ON!

I Once Was Lost, But Now I'm Found

2011-05-30T08:48:00.000-07:00

Have you ever gotten so consumed in something or someone that you sort of lose yourself? Forget what it was that made you really happy and feel good? I'm pretty sure most of the population is guilty of that at one time or another. If you've been keeping up with my blog then you already know that I took a running LEAP of Faith and completely changed my career from a 8-5, desk sitting, pencil pushing momma to Zumba Queen and Personal Trainer Extraordinaire! When I made up my mind that I wanted to change my career I was so excited to teach people what I had learned! I felt so wonderful, found a way to work out my stresses, become healthy, and have a balance of healthy mind, body, and soul. Once I became a Licensed Zumba Instructor, I started reaching far and wide so that I could really make a go at making a living doing what I love doing. Same thing when I became Certified as a Personal trainer. I spent so much time trying to get things moving and getting my name out there that I didn't have much time left for my children. I was wrapped up in pleasing this group or that group or this person, that I was seriously wearing myself out. I'd wake up at crazy hours of the morning to work and had to have others hustle my kids to their activities so that I could work until at LEAST 9pm at night. I'd get my kids just in time to bathe them and send them to bed. I LOVE Zumba, but it's not MY workout. I have a WONDERFUL time with the people that take from me.. but it's not what really turns me on and works out my stresses. I love a good independent all out, hard breathing, challenging, meditative workout. I do some of my best thinking and have some of the best conversations with God during those times. I have been missing that for some time now. I've been too exhausted with teaching anywhere from 5 to 8 Zumba classes a week to get my own workout in. After recently taking another certification class, I realized that I completely lost my balance. I was so concerned with hurting someones feelings or putting them in a tight spot that I'd neglected the three people that mean the most to me.. my two children and MYSELF! I've said before.. if you don't take care of yourself.. who will? I mean, if I'm exhausted and running on empty, then how in the heck can I lead by example and teach, not only my children, but my clients a healthy lifestyle. So.. I'm THRILLED to report that I've made some recent changes and I'm well on my way to getting my balance back! ;)

My Kids Have Too Many Happy Meal Toys
After I'd made up my mind that I needed to get my balance back and not over commit myself, especially while building up my new business, I'd come across FOUR Happy Meal toys in my daughter's bag. That's when it REALLY hit me. Over the last 5 or 6 months, my children had spent just about every weeknight at a sitter's house or in a play area while I worked. This meant that either others were enjoying my children's company at dinner or we were pulling through a drive thru on our way home. By the time I'd get home from work it would be too late to cook or warm something. Now, don't get my wrong.. I don't believe that my children have been abused, neglected or traumatized because they were at someones house or eating McDonald's.. but the point is.. this time last year, I was teaching them healthy habits. They were choosing the healthy over the junk most of the time and now here I am shoving it in their face with no other option. I'm not teaching them the very habit that I'm trying to teach my clients. So when I saw these Happy Meal toys tucked away in my daughter's purse, I realized that I had to get my balance back for my entire family. After this week, school and other extra activities will be winding down for all of us. I will now be able to make healthy nutritious meals for my children and be able to spend some time with them AND work. I just had to put me first and then work my schedule around that. Make sense?

Funny This Is..
I have been trying to make the healthier choices and sometimes when things get crazy and I’m running from one thing to another, the healthier choices are not all that healthy. I’ve tried to plan out some good snacks and quick meals so that I can get my nutrition in check while working with such a crazy schedule. In my infinite search for different meals, meal ideas, and my overall thirst for helping people plan out some easy , practical meals for themselves and their families.. I bought a few very good books for research. I have maintained the same weight and clothing size for several months now (THANK GOD), but I haven’t lost anything significant as far as total weight goes. It’s well known that I’d like to lose a little more or drop another size or two. While I was putting together some sample menus and meal ideas for some clients, I evaluated my own “diet” and I realized that I was off balance there too! I wasn’t taking in enough calories on a regular basis and then on some days I’d take in TOO MANY calories. I changed my activity drastically, but not my eating habits.. or even sometimes fell back into a bad habit or two. There are four points to a balanced life.. Physically. Mentally. Emotionally. Spiritually. Though I may have wobbled a little.. I am placing one foot in front of the other on this tight rope and moving forward with ease. I am so thankful for my family and friends for helping me out and supporting my dream. I’d like to thank the “village” for helping me with my kids and those of you who helped me keep my balance no matter how wobbly!

On that note.. take some time out for you today. What will it take for you to find your balance? ;)

I am learning all the time. The tombstone will be my diploma. ~Eartha Kitt

2011-04-05T13:19:00.000-07:00

Boy of BOY! I'm surely loving the time change and longer days! I love that the sun goes down later in the evenings giving us plenty of time of daylight to enjoy! For some reason, the spring and summer reminds me of my childhood days. Playing in the pool with friends, cut off shorts, bare feet, walking the neighborhood roads popping the tar balls with our toes, picking honeysuckle off the vine, laying out in the grass basking in the sunshine with not a single worry in the world. Aaahhh.. the good ol' days. My children are around the same age as I was when I was enjoying all of these times. I want my kids to experience the same things.. not always video games and tv. More importantly.. I want to experience it all over again with them! Three years ago I never would've had the energy to go out and do these things with the kids. Now I'm bouncing with energy and can't WAIT to take little mini vacations to the camp and the beach! Last month I ran an AWESOME 5K obstacle course called the Warrior Dash with a friend of mine. It was something neither one of us had done before, but what a GREAT feeling it was!! No we didn't lead the pack, but it was a great sense of accomplishment and a LOT of fun! I'm not QUITE were I want to be as far as my weight goes, but I keep getting a little closer to the mark! Before I wasn't comfortable in my own skin to get out and run around with the kids, but now I'm like a whole different person.. one who is surely enjoying life. I just had to take control of myself and stop letting other things control me.

"Willpower is not some mythical force that we either have or don't have. Willpower is our decision to use higher-mind thinking instead of lazing around in the clutches of our primal mind."~A.B. CURTISS

This is a Battle of Wills

I knew I had a challenge on my hands when I started spending more time at home. My office is currently in my kitchen. It's the only place that is open enough for me to work and have my computer set up. Long ago I broke the habit of buying junk food and keeping it in the house. I've said it time and time again.. if someone in my household wants junk food, then they can go to the store and buy the single serving of cookies or candy or whatever suits their fancy. I plan the meals, I do the grocery shopping, I am fighting a life long battle of bad eating, therefore, I get a say so of what foods come in my home. So.. what is my problem you ask? LOL! Well.. lemme tell YOU. I can find a 'loop hole' in everything. You can't possibly overeat fruits and vegetables.. nah.. that's not my problem. My problem is grabbing a handful of almonds, popping a bag of popcorn or just mindless munching even on the good stuff when it's not 'time' to eat. If I know I'm going to be working out of the house I'll grab my snack needed for snack time and head out.. but what about those times where I'm spending a few hours working at the house on my advertising, planning workouts, or researching something? When I'm deep in thought or contemplating something I feel the need to 'crunch'! Does anyone else have that urge? I sometimes find myself getting up from my desk to stretch my legs or get my creative juices flowing and I wander over to the cabinet! Old habits die hard I guess! GAH! It really seems silly when I think about it. There will always be new obstacles to overcome. This is a life long journey. To overcome this mindless eating that I so easily fall into, I've decided to be a little dramatic. Imagine that. -_- I tend to go all out on things if you haven't noticed. For instance, this very blog. I began blogging because I needed to be accountable to someone other than myself or my family. I needed to be accountable to people who wouldn't just let me sweep it under the rug. So my solution to this problem is to pack my lunch. Yep.. simple as that. Just as before when I'd get ready for my work day, I'd pack my lunch bag full of snacks and lunch for the entire day. I went to work and only had what I packed. So this morning, I started that routine all over again. I packed my lunch with my snacks and headed out to my first appointment this morning. Sure, I had lunch at home, but I already knew EXACTLY what I was having because all I had to do was pull it out of my lunch kit. :D My home office is still in my kitchen, and yeah.. I felt a tiny bit silly pulling out my lunch from my lunch kit in my own kitchen.. but who cares. It's for the greater good. lol! Soon my office won't be in my kitchen tho! So it all really makes sense you see. ;)

Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, "I will try again tomorrow." - Mary Anne Radmacher

Time FLIES When You're Having Fun!
Where does the time go? It seems like just yesterday we were talking about New Year's Resolutions and new beginnings. Now we're in the middle of spring! Little League Baseball and Softball is in full swing, fairs and festivals are in town and the days are getting longer. Let's do some calculations.. If beginning January 1st someone started their lifestyle change by making better choices and being more active 2-3 times a week.. it's possible to lose 2 pounds per week. By now more than 25 pounds would be lost! Wow! It really puts things into perspective doesn't it! With 25 pounds gone, you fit a little better in the rides at the fair, sit a little more comfortably in the seats at the movies, and have the energy to frolic in the glorious sunshine! So.. now here's the question.. When does your new beginning start? ;)

Let the Sun Shine Down on Me

2011-03-10T13:41:00.000-08:00

Spring is in the air and the days are starting to look brighter and brighter! Sunshine just gives me such energy! On beautiful days, such a this, I want to be running around the park, roller skating in the school parking lot, jumping on the trampoline.. SOMETHING! I wasn't always this way, but it seems like with every passing season since I first began this journey, I find more and more exciting things in life! The more comfortable I become in my own skin the more things I want to do. Things I've never tried before. Now it's time to put those things into action.. no more cheap talk.. it's time to conquer the world!!! Or at least just my bucket list. =) One thing that I inherited from my dad was tenacity.. that and the inability to carry a tune in a 10 gallon bucket.. but moving on. When I feel strongly about something as I do with my workouts and lifestyle change.. I grab the bull by the horns. A good friend once told me that there are two things that motivate people.. fear and desire. I have no fear. ;)

All Eyes on Me
Since I changed my career, I have told the story of my journey over and over. I've used it in advertising my services.. which could be the very way you found my blog! There is a method to the madness here.. not only does it do a good job at advertising where I've been and how I might be able to help people.. but more importantly.. it KEEPS me accountable. There are more people who know my story now more than ever! My before pictures are out there.. They've seen where I've come from.. I know where I came from. I can't ever forget that. I'd love to tell you that once you lose weight and eat healthy that all those cravings and temptations just vanish.. but unfortunately they don't! It is much like a drug addict.. it's always there. Sure.. I feel WAY better when I eat healthy versus eating junk.. but sometimes my cravings and temptations get the better of me! I can't stand to walk past the cookie place in the mall because I smell all of that sugary goodness! Now.. I KNOW that if I eat one of those cookies I'll feel so funky.. but it's the smell that draws me in. So.. if you see me in the mall and it looks like I'm holding my breath.. it's because I am! I just keep my head down, hold my breath, and walk right on past! It's my tactic! LoL!
With my life getting off of a regular 'work' schedule, there is more of a risk than ever before! I was used to bringing just what I needed to work and eating only that. There were no temptations because I packed only the healthy things. Now that I am out and about most of the day, or doing work in my home.. it is easier to fall back into old habits if I'm not careful. How do I overcome that?? Well.. I'll tell you how.. I continue to plan. I take my snacks with me in my gym bag, I keep healthy things on hand, I plan for everything that goes into my mouth so that I'm not eating on the fly or starving before the end of the day! It has been years since I gave up something for lent.. so this year I decided to give up my beloved sweets. No chocolate, no candy, no cake, no pastries, no cookies, no ice cream, etc.. etc.. etc.. If I'm craving something sweet it will have to be something more natural, like fruit or yogurt. I did this because it is a vice.. it's my weak spot.. it's the guilty pleasure that starts small and gets out of control. I'm letting all of that go and the outcome will be GREAT! We don't have to have a season to start something, but I found the perfect opportunity to take care of another facet of my journey.

READY! SET! GO!!
Just about this time last year I was running everyday and training for the Gusher 5K. This was a challenge for me. I had never run ANYWHERE before! Not even to the mailbox! This was something a friend had challenged me to do and I'm so glad she did! Not only is it something I can cross off of my list, but it really opened the door for me. I never thought I had the confidence to do something like that. I mean.. to RUN a 5k? I never in my wildest dreams believed that I'd be running in a race. Now don't get me wrong.. I wasn't there to cross the finish line first. I wasn't competing against other people.. You see, I was competing against myself. I was competing against the mindset that "I could never do that".. against the "I'm just the fat girl who can't run".. against the "You'll look like a fool if you get out there with all those 'athletic' people". Guess what?! I WON! I won the battle in my mind! I finished that race.. I ran start to finish.. in my own personal best time. It was a wonderful feeling.. a true 'High'. There is nothing like it. Since then I have only run one more 5k and yes, it was AWESOME! Pretty great feeling, I'll tell you! This year I signed up for a Warrior Dash and will be running that next weekend. A Warrior Dash is a fun 5k run/obstacle course. I know it seems a little crazy, but again.. stepping out of my comfort zone and doing something I've never done before. This is a great thrill for me! Wanna know what else excites me?? My kids will be there watching! Yes.. I am leading by example, be healthy, be active, follow your dreams. It may sound so cliche, but I am living proof. Sometimes, you just have to walk on Faith.. step out onto what you feel deep down in your soul. Wish me luck! This Warrior Dash won't be easy.. and I may look a little silly at the end, but I'm betting you won't be able to capture the feeling of accomplishment! ;)

I hope you all enjoyed this blog.. I've enjoyed writing it. New and exciting things seem to be happening EVERYDAY! Don't let life pass you by.. get out there and dance in the sunshine!

Planning for Success

2011-01-30T20:48:00.000-08:00

What a wonderful year this has been so far! There have been a lot of quick changes in my life and I find myself on the go way more than before! This month has come and gone already and I've barely stopped to take a breath! Let's see a show of hands of people who feel the same way. I have been working hard on my new career path which luckily includes working out, but without any real plan things get crazy! I teach Zumba several days throughout the week so I'm definitely getting good workouts in; but as of late, my meal planning and eating habits leave something to be desired. Nutrition is the backbone of my lifestyle change. It fuels my workouts and my active lifestyle. Without the fuel I am worthless. I have been very fortunate that my weight has not increased, however.. my weight has not decrease either. While I have a lot going on in life, I still must focus on the goal. Thank God I'm not where I used to be, but I'm still not quite where I want to be. I've not gone buck wild and gone back to my old habits, but when you're on the go and trying to grab healthy on the fly it doesn't always workout so good. I have to make a plan for success. The plan that I had a year ago won't work for me now. My lifestyle is more active and my body requires more of the good stuff! So.. time to invest some very important tools. Pencil and paper.

"T" is for TRACKING Boys and Girls
Research shows that people who track their food intake or keep a food diary will lose more weight in the same amount of time than a person who does not track their food intake. WHY?? Because we are accountable for EVERYTHING we put in our mouths. Why are we so afraid to write it down? Does it say keep a food diary and share it with the entire world? Nope. Is it because we think we can lie to ourselves? That one cookie or one bite of your child's peanut butter and jelly sandwich isn't all that bad? That if no one saw me eat it, then I really didn't eat it? Yeeeeeaaaahhhh.. that's probably more like it. LoL! I learned early on through Weight Watchers that tracking equals success. I tracked everything I put in my mouth for a solid year and a half. Then I got into a routine where I was eating the same menu of foods week after week. It was easy for me to see my intake.. it didn't vary much. But like life.. things changed. Sometime between then and now, my daily activities changed, my workouts changed. But I never went back to tracking and make the adjustments. I know that I had the GREATEST success when I tracked not only my intake, but my activity as well. Tracking helps with so much! I am accountable to myself for everything that I eat and do. There is no reason to lie.. I am the only one seeing it. I can remember when I was tracking and I'd have a night out or just let loose and drink myself silly I'd write notes to myself saying things like "LAWD what WERE you thinking??? BAD NITE" or "This was an awful stressful day.. HALP!". This would show me my own eating patterns.. stress eating, happy eating, I don't give a crap eating. It's all there! I was able to learn from my mistakes and make progress. It was also a GREAT tool to help me plan meals when I was tired of the routine I was in. I could go back a few months and see a meal that I had made that I'd really liked that I'd forgotten about! It is a great thing all the way around. It coaches you through your ups and downs. As of this very day, I began tracking again. The good, the bad, and the terribly ugly.

SCREAM it From the Roof Tops!
In 2008, I made a commitment to myself to become healthier and lose weight. I had to make myself accountable to someone.. EVERYONE. If I just told my best friend, husband, or mother that I wanted to lose weight they would just smile and nod and when I failed they'd never mention it again. They would never come back and really hold me accountable. I had to have a greater accountability.. thus.. my blog. :) I really use this as another tool.. a journal. I talk about my ups and downs.. occasionally I go back and read them. I knew that by posting the first blog that someone would read it and hold me accountable. Now.. was I expecting someone to haul me to the town square if I failed? Of course not! But what has happened is that people occasionally follow my blog because they are interested in the progress I've made. Turns out.. I've got some pretty awesome cheerleaders out there! I've never been one to put my business out there but this was different. It turned out to be one the best tools and motivators I'd ever had. I get excited about my progress and OTHERS get excited about my progress! Who knew?! People really DO want you to succeed! ..and for those who don't.. to hell with them. ;) I've never EVER had anyone come up to me and say "Tina.. you don't look like you've lost weight. Have you given up?" But every time I see someone who knows my story or hasn't seen me in a while, they compliment me. Yes.. even on my worst, fat, unsexy feeling days.. someone will compliment me and that will turn my whole day around. It makes me refocus. It is a wonderful tool to have. While blogging may not be for everyone, if you are interested in losing weight, I encourage you to tell people! Tell LOTS of people! They are more supportive than you think!

I am AWESOMELY excited with the direction my life is heading. I wouldn't change a thing! So.. I'm NOT.. I'm getting back to the tried and true, tracking and accountability. I've come a long way and there's NO going back. It's time to progress further through this journey I call my lifestyle revolution. So.. WHO'S WITH ME?!?!?!

A Fresh Start

2011-01-02T20:14:00.000-08:00

Happy New Year! Here's to a New Year of New Beginnings! As much as I enjoy the holiday season, I am so glad the festivities are over. It is so challenging to keep on track with everything with all the Christmas parties, special lunches, goodies and what not. Not to mention getting in your regular workouts! Now that all of that is over it's time to refocus on my goal. I have lots of things lined up for the new year to help me and hopefully others do just that!

The Kinda Good, Not So Bad, and the Down Right Ugly
Christmas 2009 was a huge lesson learned. I got a little confident about my weight loss and decided to make all KINDS of goodies for everyone.. mainly meaning me. That year I gained 10 pounds in a two week period. I felt AWFUL! Not only did I feel sluggish and bloated for days because of all of the junk, but I couldn't stop eating it! It was like being on a bad ride! This year I came into it with that lesson learned and vowed to not do anything like that again! I did pretty good with keeping on track as long as working lunches, Christmas parties or emotional eating wasn't involved. L O L! One good side of my former job was that we didn't have a whole lot of person to person interaction.. most of my relationships with work were by phone or email. I didn't have to worry about goodies passing through my office.. THANK YOU BABY JESUS.. nor did I have to attend company Christmas parties. So.. it wasn't a COMPLETE disaster. Many times when I was out I would try for the better choices.. but then there were times when I'd have dinner and think that I'd just go ahead and enjoy the food.. which is fine, but I saw this pattern where it was starting to happen more and more. That's me and my constant battle. If I'm not careful it can sooo easily get out of hand. Yes, my life has changed tremendously.. Yes, I make better choices.. and Yes, it's still something I'll have to deal with forever and ever, Amen.  There's no switch. The temptations I had before are still tempting to me now. I've learned tricks and tips on how to control my temptations and how to not give in. I have also learned a hard lesson of how much it takes to get it all off. There's no magic pill.. I'm still me.

I Have This Cake and I Will Eat It, Too
While holiday festivities can be fun, it can also bring on an array of emotions from one end of the spectrum to the other. I've said it before and I'll say it again.. "Hi.. I'm Tina and I'm an emotional eater". When I'm happy, I want something fun and festive.. margarita's even! When I'm sad, I want comfort food.. and chocolate. ;) If I'm stressed, I'll grab anything I can find. When I'm pissed, I want something crunchy. See how I even analyze my food cravings!? LOL! Well.. long, emotional story short.. I was left with a whole German chocolate cake. This just SCREAMS danger! I wish I were like my kids.. I'll cut them a piece of cake.. they'll take like 2 bites and then they're done. Isn't that just special. Me.. I'm like licking the plate to make sure I got every bit of chocolate icing there is to get. Oh.. and then there's the whole "I don't need a plate because I'm just gonna take a bite or 12" thing. Does any of this sound familiar?  I finally had to dump half the damn cake in the trash. Isn't it awful that my kids don't get to enjoy these things because I just can't deal with it? Well.. tough. :) I know what works for me and what doesn't. If I'm truly having a craving.. different from temptation.. that is one thing. But the temptation of just seeing it out on the counter or smelling the sweet, sugary, chocolaty, goodness is a whole different story. If I could just muster up the 'courage' to walk away from it and leave it there.. then all would be well. But it is difficult for me. It's best to just not have it in the house. PERIOD. So.. in the trash it went.. upside down.. smashed.. get it. :) Aaaaaaanywho.. moving right along..

On Your Mark.. Get Set.. GOOOOOO!!!!
Well, I'm off and running on my new career. Yay! I'll spare you on how flippin excited I am because I know you all haven't heard it near enough. ;) This new year not only brings on a new career for me, but new challenges, as well! I'm going to be participating in a Warrior Dash and a relay marathon. What is a Warrior Dash you ask? It's kind of like a 5k, but it's more than running.. it's an awesomely muddy and uncomfortable obstacle course! It's gonna be GREAT! I'll admit I was a little intimidated at first.. I mean, these people just look so athletic! But after a little encouraging I decided to just go for it. It doesn't matter if I finish last as long as I finish. I will also be apart of a running group who will be running the relay in The Gusher this year. This is also a new challenge. I can do a 5k.. I've met that goal and feel so accomplished! But by being apart of this team, it means that I have to run 5.25 miles. That's a couple miles longer than a 5K (3.1 miles). I'm a little nervous about it.. but it will be great to be apart of a team! I'm telling you.. never in my WILDEST dreams did I ever think I'd be doing any of this with my life! It is a very, very awesome feeling.

The End of Chapter YR 2010 - Most Frustrating Year EVAR
I've gone back and read my ups and downs over the last year. It's not been easy.. in fact, it was pretty freakin frustrating at times. My weight on the scales doesn't seem to be moving in either direction significantly, but my body is still ever changing. I've ditched the "weight" goal and have gone for more of a fit goal. Meaning..   that HALLELUJAH.. I am FINALLY comfortable in my own skin! Sure.. we can all find things we'd like to fix and work on. And you won't be catching me in a bikini ANYTIME soon.. but I am happy with me. I think for the first time ever, I'm truly ok with what I see in the mirror. Not just ok.. but excited! I love the woman I see before me, no matter what anyone else thinks. Besides.. it was never about them anyway. So.. here's to a happy, healthy, fit new year! I hope you, too can be happy in your own skin. If you're not.. what are ya gonna do about it? ;)

A Year of New Beginnings

2010-12-22T18:12:00.000-08:00

Don't ya just love the New Year? No matter what you're going through, no matter where you are.. it's a New Year. It's a time to clean out your closet and start fresh. Hell.. we could do just that with every new day, but there just seems to be something about a New Year. It's a target far enough away to prepare ourselves for what's about to happen. Many of you will resolve to be healthier this year, some will resolve to be organized, start and plan to follow a budget; but for some it will be major changes. Well, you can put me in all of those categories! I know it's been a LOOOOONG time since you all have heard from me and I'm positive you're just chompin at the bits wondering what it is that I've been up to. If you know me, you should know by now that I don't give up that easily. ;) Since the last time I blogged, so much has happened and I am soooooo ready and excited to share it with you all! Now.. let's see.. where shall I start......

"The More You Prepare, The Luckier You Appear" ~ Terry Josephson

Dream a Little Dream
In September, I spoke of "A Bright New Tommorow", but I had NO idea just how bright it was gonna be! I had aspirations, once upon a time, to become a nutritionist or something in the health and fitness field, but that quickly dissipated after gaining weight, getting married, gaining more weight, having children, gaining more weight, working a full time job, and oh.. yeah.. I gained more weight. BUT, after two solid years of eating right and working hard to lose everything I had gained over the years and THEN SOME, I realized what I wanted to be when I grew up! Since I graduated from high school, I worked toward a career as a nine to five pencil pushing momma because I thought that that is what I was supposed to do; little did I know that my lifestyle revolution would take me on a journey that I had only ever dreamed about!

"Dream as if you'll live forever. Live as if you'll die today." ~James Dean

WHEN I GROW UP..
I'm 32 years old and FINALLY know what I want to do with my life! In November, I turned in my notice at my job to embark on a new career as a dance teacher, fitness instructor, and personal trainer. I set out to become a certified Zumba instructor; and because of a very generous, kind woman who barely knows me, but has faith in me and what I am doing, I am able to attend a course at Cooper's Clinic in January to become a Certified Personal Trainer! EXCITED does not even BEGIN to describe how I am feeling these days! I feel like I'm walking in the clouds! There have been a couple of personal trials that I've gone through.. I could sit here and tell you how nervous I am about quitting my job and how I hope that I can do this.. but I'm not. ;) I know that this is what I was made to do. I am so unbelievably at peace with quitting my stable job to start a new career. I don't know all the details, I can't tell you exactly what the future holds, and I can't tell you my 5 year plan.. but what I can tell you is that I know deep down in my SOUL that I will be successful. I may not make millions and become Madonna's personal trainer, but I will be HAPPY! Doors have been opening all over the place for me! There is alot of opportunity and I have lots of things in the works for and in my community. I am so excited to see what the New Year will bring in for me. I. Can't. WAIT!!

"Don't be pushed by your problems. Be led by your dreams.”~ Unknown

When One Door Closes..
It is SO true that when one door closes another one opens. I chose to close the door on my career, but all KINDS of doors are flying open!! I am currently teaching Zumba at a couple of locations and still teaching dance, as well. In the New Year, I will be teaching more Zumba classes and will be apart of a gym in my area! I am very excited about the possibilities out there! If the good Lord is willing and the creeks don't rise, after I pass my Personal Trainer Exam I will be training at a gym in Fannett! This just thrills me to NO END! I want a career that I very much enjoy and will allow me to be available for my children whenever I need to be. This has always been very important to me, but I've always been in a job where if I left then I'd be leaving someone hanging or feel guilty for not getting all the work done before I left or blah blah blah. My dream is to one day become a strength training and conditioning coach. Ideally I would LOVE to work at a University training athletes! How AWESOME would THAT be????? But.. baby steps.. baby steps. Who knows what the future holds, but I am UNBELIEVABLY excited to find out! ;)

What will the New Year bring to you?

“Keep your dreams alive. Understand to achieve anything requires faith and belief in yourself, vision, hard work, determination, and dedication. Remember all things are possible for those who believe" ~Gail Devers

MISS ME???

2010-11-29T12:01:00.001-08:00

I'm still here and have LOTS in the works! I'll update later this week so STAY TUNED!!! EEEEeeeekkk!!

A Whole New World

2010-09-22T20:02:00.000-07:00

As they say in Weight Watchers, "This isn't a race it's a marathon"! I have learned a new meaning to that over the last several months. The first time I heard that statement was close to two years ago. At that time I was losing on average about two pounds a week and I thought, "Hey.. this marathon thing is really working for me! ;) " I carried on with that kind of weight loss for a good year and then I hit a few bumps in my road and it seemed to get harder and harder. Then as you all know I hit this brick wall. I haven't had any real significant weight loss in a few months. My "marathon" wasn't so much fun as it was frustrating! For a long time this motto, to me, meant that a slow weight loss is good and long lasting. No one needs to lose a huge amount of weight fast because it will cause a SLEW of problems. As of late, I have come to realize that this motto isn't just about the speed at which one should lose weight. There is so much more behind this meaning. When I think of a race, I think of something quick.. fast.. in the moment.. and then it's all over with. It's a sprint from the 50 yard line to the goal line. It's the rabbit trying to catch the carrot. Aaaahhh.. but a marathon. A marathon is slow.. paced.. long lasting.. something that you'll remember forever. It's winning the Superbowl. It's a lesson that will make you grow and will forever stick with you. My marathon has changed from my pushing so hard to make the numbers on the scale go down. My marathon will last me a lifetime. Just like a marathon runner, I have trained and trained. I have met new friends on my route. I have become weary and lost focus at times. I have had my cheerleaders cheering me on. I have learned new things about my life, about myself, about my strength, my endurance, my determination, my confidence and on and on. Being in a marathon gives you time to think and reflect on yourself and your life and I gotta say.. it's getting more and more exciting!! Don't get me wrong.. the numbers on the scale still matter and I still look forward to seeing them drop more and more, but I refuse to let it get me down. Instead I look at the big picture and the wonderful road ahead!

Breaking Boundaries

The numbers on the scale have bounced back and forth over a couple of pounds, but my body is ever changing. I have continued to have some pretty exciting breakthroughs! A few weeks ago I was able to fit into a size 6 jeans. I can't even explain to you how weird that is to even type that. It is an unbelievable feeling. Coming from the size 24 jeans that I started in.. just makes it unimaginable. Just this past week by a total accident I discovered that I fit into a SMALL t-shirt! I have such mixed emotions! Every time I step on that scale I am so frustrated that it just hoovers over the same mark week after week after week. But then great things are happening and progress is still being made.. just in a different way. How can I argue with that? Don't answer that.. I'm sure I'll find a way. I will continue to keep pushing forward in my everlasting marathon. Just because I reach my goal doesn't mean I've crossed the finish line. ;)

A Bright New Tomorrow
A couple of months ago, I was approached with an opportunity to teach a dance class. For those of you who don't know me.. I have always loved dance. It's my thing! I've danced since I was a young girl all the way up through high school. I had looked into being on the Lamar University dance team after I graduated, but unfortunately I didn't meet the requirements.. meaning I was too fat. At that point I gave up pursuing anything that had to do with dance. I was too fat and didn't want to hear anymore rejection so I just stopped. I didn't try to lose weight. I just went on with life. Well here I am 15 years later and a few pounds lighter teaching 6 dance classes a week and looking to teach more! But I'm not stopping there! This has opened up something inside of me that I've had buried for a while. I was too scared of rejection to go for it before, but now I am working toward getting a few fitness certifications and a personal trainer certification so that I can do what I love doing. I still want to go back to school, but baby steps.. baby steps. I believe there is a great opportunity for me out there, not only to support my family, but to have a gratifying life! I am very VERY excited about what my future holds. I'm looking forward to what lies ahead for me!

Wish me luck on my marathon! Are you sprinting? Or are you taking it nice and slow? ;)

F-I-R-E UP! That's the Way We Spell FIRE UP!

2010-08-03T14:43:00.000-07:00

I think summer time is my favorite time of the year. I have enjoyed the kids being out of school and our schedules are a little less hectic. It's nice to take a weekend getaway on a whim without having to worry about ball practices and dance recitals. It is the laid back life that I've always loved.. with that, comes laid back meal plans.  There aren't "school nights" driving the family to eat at a specific hour so we can get homework done and get to bed at an early hour. Instead you're planning vacations! Weight loss, like vacations, takes much preparation and planning. While on your travels there are ups and downs.  There are very exciting moments.. like the anticipation of what is to come and all the places you will visit. There are a few lulls.. like the car ride down a long highway with nothing but trees or open land to look at. There will be moments when you take a wrong turn and get lost and have to back track a couple of miles because you zigged when you should've zagged. It's no secret that I have been going through ups and downs.. some really exciting moments, a few lulls, and even a couple of detours. It's enough to make you CRAZY! In my previous posts you have seen where I have been analyzing myself and why I'm not losing like I did in the beginning. I've analyzed such factors like, adding more weight to my workouts, more cardio, changing my eating, plateaus.. you name it! I've given myself excuses as to why I'm not losing, vowing that I'll analyze that and change.  I want nothing more than to reach my goal and lead a healthy happy lifestyle forever and ever amen. But it takes WORK!  Constant work.  Just when I think I have it all under control, I am quickly reminded that I'm not invincible. It's not an obsession, but it is something that HAS to stay at the forefront of your mind. It may not be a HUGE battle every second of the day to stay away from the junk.. but all it takes it a few compliments and a pat on the back for all of your hard work and you start to think that one day of cheating won't hurt you. Then before you know it, one day turns into a day and a half.. turns into Friday evening through Sunday at lunch and maybe dinner if you weren't TOO bad over the weekend. ;) Sound familiar? Yep.. it's the game. We all play the game. Well.. if this is a game.. I want to be the CHEERLEADER!

The Only Way to Not Go Back is to NOT GO BACK!

These are my mother's wise words. I don't ever intend on going back to the way I was before.. overweight, miserable, and unhappy. I have worked very hard and continue to work even harder. Maybe I'm too tough on myself, but I'm afraid to let up. It's not easy mentally or physically and I'm terrified to let it all go to waste. If i have a lax attitude, it'll be too easy get back into old habits.  I'm not perfect and I will cheat, have emotional moments, have 'what the hell' moments, etc.. so by setting my expectations so high it gives me a little cushion before I get out of hand. So yeah.. I have my moments of letting loose and splurging (or over splurging in some cases) but I reign it in by being hard on me.   Is this making ANY sense? Because it all does in my head. LOL! :D

The Devil Made Me Do It

Along with less hectic schedules and laid back meal plans, summer time brings back yard bbq's, gatherings, parties, and drinks on the patio. In the beginning, I had realized how many empty calories alcohol had and that I was really wasting my "Points" on such crap. I could handle a drink every now and then, but when I would go out and really party it up.. not only was I dealing with the empty calories and tons of sugar in the drinks, but I was also having to deal with the late night drive thru and let's not forget the day after. Who doesn't eat crap when you have a hangover. Jack in the Box has never tasted so good! I was so focused on the effects of one night of drinking that I had quit drinking so much so often (and no.. I don't have a drinking problem).    Well.. since my favorite season has rolled back around and I'm gracing my presence at all these different social gatherings, I've let myself slip back into the drinking habit. It doesn't have to be every weekend, but just a night/weekend here, there, and everywhere really starts to add up. Over this past weekend there were two nights where I drank more than I should have and dealt with the day after effects. No fun I tell you. It effects my eating and my workouts. I am sabotaging myself. I'm fooling myself into thinking that just a "night out" won't hurt me. In reality, a night out won't hurt you.. it's the repeated nights out.  That continuous accountability that I've talked about before really helps.  I may be trying to fool myself.. but once you step on the scale there is no more fooling.  Do you really know how fast junk and alcohol for a weekend can pack on the pounds? LOL! I mean.. really .. it's SICKENING! So who was I really fooling? LOL! NO ONE! I am ashamed to report that I packed on about 6 pounds over the weekend. I don't enjoy sharing that information, but it is what it is and I've always said that I would be accountable for my actions. Was this a vacation weekend? No. Was this a super exciting weekend that I'll never forget or regret? Umm.. newp. It was just another weekend with another gathering with some really great people. Was it worth the added weight and added work I'll have to do? Hell to tha NO! Damn you SATAN for putting that alcohol and hot links to my lips! BAH!

I have stepped back, looked at myself, analyzed, re-analysed.. and now I'm just going to humble myself, keep my head down and work hard. It is so hard to keep focus when life gets in the way.. but that's just another excuse.. and I'm FRESH OUT of excuses. I'm still not giving up on my goals. It may not happen in the time frame I've set for myself, but the point is to TRY and get there. So here I go.. one step at a time! ;)

P.S.

This blog and weight loss journey is brought to you by the Good Lord himself, because without Him there would be no weight loss journey. :)

Lighting a Fire

2010-07-12T18:46:00.000-07:00

We've just returned from a great weekend getaway in The Big Easy! We had so much fun that I think I might move there! LOL! We parked the truck when we got there and walked everywhere! The next time we saw our vehicle was when we were pulling out of the hotel. It was a great experience and I am already planning the next getaway there! Now.. let's get down to bidness. I'd love nothing more than to tell you how I was well prepared and stayed on target the entire time with only little splurges.. but that's not how it went down. Sure, I tried picking the healthier choices here and there, even split a few meals with my husband, and I'm happy to report that I didn't drink myself to the verge of death as I've done in the past; but the reality of it is that there was some pretty awesome food there! It was also very rich and it didn't take long for me to realize that my appetite isn't the same as it once was. We went to one restaurant where the waitress went on and on about how 'good the food was mainly because of all of the butter that it was cooked in'.. and boy was there some butter! As you can imagine, it was challenging to make healthier choices in a place known for their fine cuisine! I could also tell you how awful I feel and how I hate myself.. but I'm not! ;) Wanna know why? Because I enjoyed myself! I didn't hate it one single bit! I tried to be cautious and not over stuff myself, but I enjoyed my vacation and the food that went along with it. I didn't abandon all that I've learned, but I did live a little.. and that's okay. I don't do this everyday. I don't feel that I "deserved" it either.. food isn't my reward. My reward was having a wonderful vacation and being able to be comfortable in my own skin and loving the new me! That being said.. I am back to reality and it's time to get this mutha back on track!

Complacency is a BEAST!
A few short weeks ago, I had finally broken my plateau. I had a consistent loss for a few weeks in a row. But I see myself becoming complacent again. I know that I'm not yet where I want to be, but the thoughts of "you've come along way" or "you don't need to work SO hard" start to creep in. That is one of the scariest things YET! It's time to shake off those "you deserve a break" thoughts and get to work! I set a goal a looooong time ago to lose 100 pounds.. and even though I'm not there yet, I'm ready to set a new goal. I feel like a new person and should re-evaluate where I am and move forward. No more looking back! I'm gonna drive this baby home! This week I've started a new 'diet' (gawd I despise that word) plan. As I've said before, I thirst for knowledge. To be successful, you have to accept change. What worked for me 9 months ago doesn't work for me now in both my 'diet' and my workouts. If I don't grow how will I ever reach my goal? In this 'diet' I'm learning, not necessarily to change what I'm eating, but more a change in how I eat it. It has a direct effect on the hormones in my body.. a hormone called leptin that sends signals to the brain that there is fat on the body. When your leptin levels are high then your body recognizes that there is fat, but when your leptin levels are low then your body tends to think that there isn't fat to be lost. Needless to say.. after my vacation, my leptin levels are through the ROOF! LOL! But that's okay.. it's all apart of my plan! ;)

Embracing Who I Am
It seems that the closer I get to my goal and the more knowledge I gain, more people have asked me for advice, tips, motivation, etc. While I am far from being an expert on any of this, I do know what's worked for me. I know my own body. I know what my weaknesses are. I know what my strengths are. I know how to motivate myself. I KNOW ME! By being confident in myself, I think it draws people to want that same confidence. Not necessarily to be me.. but they want to know what it takes to know themselves! I'm always ready to give people ideas about what works for me regarding workouts and meal ideas.. but I've honestly always felt silly about it. I felt like "who am I to give anyone advice"... well, I've finally come to accept and embrace who I am. I am a woman who has worked very hard for a long time and over came a huge obstacle that many people find frustrating. I am a woman who works for a living and raises two children who has stopped making excuses for myself. I am a woman who is proud of what's been accomplished and enjoys so much more in life. I am a woman with perseverance and determination to get to the next level. I will no longer be embarrassed about what I've learned along the way. THAT is who I am!

Setting a New Goal
As I've said earlier, it is time to re-evaluate myself and set new goals. This is kinda skeerin' me.. but I have to make it public. I have to be accountable. My new goal is to lose 25 pounds by October 15th. It is a realistic goal.. but rest assured that it will be no easy feat. It will take continued hard work and constant awareness of what I am putting into my body. This will bring me to a 117lb weight loss. That is seriously an entire healthy grown adult. I WILL reach my goal. Wish me luck.. I'm on the road home with a LOAD of knowledge!

If You Want a Revolution..

2010-06-29T21:40:00.000-07:00

This Gatorade song has become my new theme song! I have evolved in so many ways. It's not just a change in the way I look and feel, it's a change in my thinking. A REAL CHANGE. There is only one thing that hasn't truly changed yet and that is the way that I view myself. I've said it before and here I am again saying that I know I don't look like the old me and I don't feel like the old me. I can see it when I look in the mirror, but it aaalmost doesn't feel like me. I know it's hard to understand and just as difficult to put into words. I put on these great new clothes that I'd only dreamed of fitting into and I still find things to criticize myself about. After you get to a certain point in gaining weight you try to not look in the mirror too long! I would make sure from the neck up I was "RED CARPET READY", but from the neck down was a different story! So one fine day years ago, I got rid of the full length mirror thinking that I'd get a new one. Since I wasn't too interested in seeing all of me, it wasn't such a priority. About a week ago, I bought the first full length mirror in 5 years. I know that I've glanced at myself in the mirror at the gym or in the department store, but again I was afraid to look for too long. I hung my mirror up and stepped back and looked at myself.. REALLY LOOKED AT MYSELF for the first time in years! I swear to you, I almost didn't recognize me! It is fun.. but it is very weird to see myself in a body that I've never seen before. I didn't looked like this when I was younger. Unfortunately, I am still a woman who has issues. I still see so much that needs work, but the bottom line is that I have to learn to be comfortable in my own skin. That is a new goal for me. To learn to not nit pick every single thing about me, grow to love the me I've become. It's not as easy as you might think. The harder I work, the more critical I am of myself. I am learning throughout my journey that there is an evolution all the way around.. Mind, Body and Soul.

The heart and soul of my adventure.. EXERCISE!!!!

My workouts keep me on my toes! I am currently alternating a workout laid out for me, tabata, and weight training with my trainer. I LOVE challenging myself.. finding my limits and pushing them just a little more. Last week I did a max out dead lift of 205lbs! My personal best! I'm pretty excited about it! I love strength training! Who knows.. in a different life maybe I would've tried to compete, but for now I just want to keep pushing my limits.. Compete against myself. It helps that I have a couple of cheerleaders to workout with, too! I find that alot of the time I don't give myself enough credit and often under estimating myself, but it's good to have a good support line to help motivate me to keep pushing on. Everyone needs that support! I look forward to every single workout to see what boundaries I can push!

It's just food, right?

Um.. except for chocolate. Chocolate is the devil. This is another huge area where I've evolved. I started out with baby steps. I would make my portion healthier rather than changing up the whole family's dinner. Once it became a habit to choose the healthier foods, I was ready to try new things! Here's the deal.. if you can strip away everything you think about food.. realize that food truly is fuel.. get back to basics.. then you can really start enjoying your food! Who knew?? Sort of like a food detox. you clean out your life.. you clean out your closet.. so get rid of all the trash and clean out your cabinets! Get back to the basics. Eat for a purpose.. not just for pleasure. Once you get there.. you really will find pleasure in the fuel! I feel like for the first time in my life I have a clean pallet! I am beginning to enjoy things more and more in their whole and natural state. Almonds without all of the salt.. veggies that are still a little crisp and not cooked down to mush. It wasn't this way in the beginning.. It took time to get here. So if you're not here yet.. don't get discouraged.. YOU CAN EVOLVE!

I learn new and exciting things every single day! I feel like this wonderful adventure is a road of constant exploration and discovery! Good luck on your exploration! Let me know what you find! 'K? ;)

Remember.. You can't lead by force. You lead by example.

It's Not Just a Journey, It's an ADVENTURE!!

2010-06-15T17:42:00.000-07:00

I suddenly feel like my life really began 18 months ago. I have had ups and down, losses and gains, plateaus and huge break throughs! But more importantly, I think I found my true self! I never imagined that by just changing this facet of my life, that it would allow me to have the confidence to open up more and realize what I want out of life. This has been more fun than stompin' baby chickens! I don't know where this road will end, but it has taken me through so much. I had a realization in the beginning that this wasn't a fad diet, nor was it a bid to get skinny by pulling my bun off of my cheeseburgers. This was something that was going to last. This adventure has allowed me to do things I'd forgotten I loved and things I didn't even KNOW I loved! This is too exciting to keep to myself and I love sharing what I've been through with anyone who will listen! Every now and then I get someone to change their way of thinking about exercise and food and that is the most AWESOME feeling! I truly believe that more and more people really want to be healthy! A junkie doesn't really wanna be a junkie and the same applies here!

The Fat Old Me is Gone FOREVAH!
This past weekend we bought a new dresser for our bedroom. I was so excited about it and immediately started going through our clothes and picking out what to trash and what to keep. I didn't realize how LIBERATING this would be! I pulled every single stitch of clothing I had out of tubs, drawers, and closets. I have culled my closet a couple of times since I've started my journey. When I'd get into a new size, I'd take the older clothes and set them aside only holding on to tshirts, undershirts, and just comfortable lounge clothes. After all was said and done I had given away 4 large garbage bags full of clothes and thrown away at least 2 bags worth of clothes! When I walked back into my closet, I had one single lonely shirt hanging in there. LOL! I had really cleaned out EVERYTHING this time! Not a shred of my "fat clothes" left! Now.. don't fret.. I'm not walking around nekkid. I did have my usual, but limited, wardrobe which couldn't fit into my closet for all the CRAP I had in there! While I was at this whole spring cleaning thing.. I was going through things that had to be put up into my memory boxes. I came across my engagement pictures from 2000. I once remember looking at those photos and wishing I could look like that again. The sad thing is.. I was still very heavy then, but before I'd started losing weight I had allowed myself to get so far gone that I wanted to look like a less fat version of myself! CRAZINESS I TELL YOU! I was showing my husband the pictures and was telling him how I couldn't BELIEVE that I had once longed to look like that again! I never really knew how heavy I was.. not even at my heaviest! I know NOW that I really wasn't as happy as I thought I was. I only thought that I felt great.. but that was a HUGE lie! I can't imagine spending a day in my old body ever ever ever again. I hadn't really planned on sharing before and after photos until I've reached my goal, but I just don't think you can appreciate my entire story until you see it with your own eyes. So.. I'm doing something I've never had the nerve to do before. TAKE A PICTURE! EEK! This is scary stuff! LOL!

Here are a couple of before pictures.. PROCEED WITH CAUTION!

This picture is Juuuuust before I began my crazy journey.

This picture is me in January 2009 and was down 15 pounds. I thought I was one hawt momma!

This is some of my most recent pictures. I may not be to my ideal weight or look like Twiggy.. but I have to admit that I'm pretty darn proud of me.. and THAT is what counts the MOSTEST!

Okay.. I'm not all that brave to post anymore. But you can see the difference. Right?

Knowledge isn't just power, it's EMPOWERING!
I have recently been finding myself researching foods and what makes my body tick. I mean.. you can't do brain surgery without first knowing how the brain works. RIGHT? I have reached this new level in my adventure! I thirst for more knowledge! It helps me understand why I feel the way I feel. I am really in touch and aware of myself. I understand how foods effect me.. and IT's AMAZING what you can find out! PLUS!!! I can plan meals better! I've read a book called "The Mediterranean Diet". Now WAIT! Before you shut me down.. I've never in my entire life read a "DIET" book before. In fact, I despise them. Atkins didn't do it for me.. the whole eating a t-bone steak and bacon for every meal sounded good for like a day. The same with other books, like 'The South Beach Diet' and any of those others that claim they will be the last diet book you will ever read. In fact, I was so un-interested in reading "The South Beach Diet" book that I bought the Cliff's notes and skipped to the recipes! Then I was so disappointed in the so called recipes because it wasn't something that I could work into my families lifestyle. I have three children.. er.. I mean two children and a husband.. and I am still the cook in the family. This is MY lifestyle change and although my goal is for my family to be healthy, I can't shove it down their throats. In my quest for knowledge, I realized that I need to EAT TO LIVE NOT LIVE TO EAT! All of this information has opened my eyes about how to become a healthier person and use foods to fight against the very things that are have plagued my family (cancer, heart disease, diabetes, high cholesterol, etc) for generations! You don't have to study like a college student on finals night, but just look up some information.. you'd be surprised at what you THINK you know. LOL!

I was so excited about sharing the knowledge that I had with others who wanted more information that I had began my facebook group. I was ready to spill it! I didn't realize that by doing so that I would get so much more information and motivation! I am very very excited about finding the new me! My new life looks pretty exciting and I don't wanna stop anytime soon! Feel free to join me in finding the new you! ;)

The Best Laid Plans..

2010-06-04T10:16:00.000-07:00

Well.. let's see.. I planned our camping trip for 3 weeks. I made list upon list to make sure we didn't leave out ANYTHING! I made meal plans in advance so that I could stay on track. I packed bug spray, bathing suits, PERFECT meals, first aid kit, coffee pot, YOU NAME IT! I would've packed the damn kitchen sink if I could've fit ONE MORE THING in that truck! Unfortunately, our vacation was ruined by the rain.. we made it to the campgrounds in the pouring rain and decided to stay in a hotel instead. We woke up this morning hoping for better weather only to find out that the clouds were only circling over us and that it will rain all weekend. We loaded the truck back up and and headed home. I am down, depressed, aggravated, grumpy.. I was SO needing and looking forward to some time away and playing in the sunshine. We are here at home.. my junk food junkie is DYING to come out. This is another one of my weaknesses.. EMOTIONAL EATING. BLEH! I was so well prepared for the camp and had all my meals laid out. I was set up for total success, but things don't always turn out the way we plan, right? All I want to do (and frankly.. have been doing all morning) is sit here and whine. I have caught myself so many times going into the kitchen to find stuff to graze on. Luckily, I come to my senses and have stuck to fruit and almonds. But even then, I have to consciously walk away from it. My husband is on HIGH ALERT and knows that I'm wanting to feed off the trash. I told him to ask me where I was going every time I walked into the kitchen. It's a thing we do! ATTENTION: He does this out of TOTAL support. He knows how hard I've worked and knows that if I were in my right mind I wouldn't want to throw it all away! LOL! While sitting at my computer cancelling the reservations for the remaining nights at the camp, it occurred to me that I should blog about it. I don't have any interest in eating healthy at this very moment.. in fact quite the opposite. Those Star Crunch and Dorito's are looking MIIIIIIGHTY appetizing right now. LOL! I know if I talk it out and tell myself that it WILL NOT make me feel better that I can regain my focus. TRYING. REALLY. HARD. :D Believe it or not.. I'm already feeling better! As I am typing this, my husband asks why I am blogging.. he doesn't understand this emotional eating. AZZ. My daughter overhears this conversation and she asked me about emotional eating. I told her that it was something that makes about as much sense as putting on mascara just because you're watching a baseball game. The two don't go hand in hand and make no sense at all. She gets it.. let's hope she's more like her daddy in that department!

Turning it Around
I will put on my game face. This isn't the vacation that I had hoped for, but I have to it for my own sanity! I will put my big girl panties on and deal with it. I will continue with the healthy meals and snacks I had planned. I will continue to be active by jumping on the elliptical in a bit.. also a GREAT stress reliever! ;) The rain should be cleared up by tomorrow, we are making plans to take the kids to the beach. I am going to try my very best to be flexible so that if things don't workout to my expectations then I can just roll with the punches. I AM going to make the best out of this! There is no sense in whining about it and hurting myself or sabotaging my diet.

Life's Not Always a Bowl of Beautiful Fresh Red Cherries
I could sit here and whine for the rest of the weekend about how things didn't go my way. I could quietly eat my junk while no one's looking and tell you all what an awesome job I did, but that would just be lying. Right? I can lie to you.. but I can't lie to myself. The truth is.. I'm sure I'm not the only one that goes through these struggles. And I may go through this type of thing for the rest of my life. What I have learned is that binging on junk food will not make my weekend ANY better.. not one single bit. I'll bet that it won't even taste as good as I think it will.. but I'd probably finish the bag of cookies or chips anyway. At the end of it all I will be upset with myself for losing control. I WILL win this war. This isn't just about losing 100+ pounds. This is about so much more! This is about being 100% healthy even when I don't want to. Sure.. we can all have our splurges on special days, but why "splurge" on the crappy one's too? This is the new me and I will overcome it and not give into my temptations!

Writing this blog at this very moment has helped me tremendously. It has put my focus back where it needs to be. I know that I have to be accountable for my actions. Those of you who read my blogs and ask for information or just how I am doing is what drives me! Thanks for 'listening' to me spill my guts. It helps more than you could imagine! Soooo.. here's to a great weekend! Good luck to you all this weekend with your own battles!

Let the Summer Games BEGIN!

2010-06-01T14:12:00.000-07:00

Summer time is upon us, kids are out of school, and vacation plans are in the works! Our family takes mini vacations throughout the summer, so if I'm not careful this can be dangerous! The first of our mini vacations begins this weekend and not a moment too soon! We are leaving Thursday and taking the kids camping at the lake! If I stick to plan this can be a great success! I have made 565431651 lists to prepare myself. I've made a camp site list, a packing list, a grocery list, an activity list, and it should be no surprise.. a menu for the weekend. Since we're going to be one with nature an' stuff, this is the perfect time to be active. There is a 'hiking' trial (and I use that term loosely), swimming, and a road that circles through the park! I see some REAL opportunities to keep active! YAY! I am working on coming up with a few morning time activities that will help me burn some fat! Someone told me, "just remember you're on vacation, so just relax!". Well, to be totally honest, I find it very relaxing! A good early morning workout right on the lake sounds so refreshing to me, and I'll be back at the camp in time for breakfast and coffee, rip roaring ready to ROLL! We'll see how fabulous that sounds in 80 degree East Texas heat and humidity.. BUT I have to at least TRY, right?! LOL! If you don't hear from me by Wednesday of next week... SEND HALP!

I Scream, You Scream, We all scream for.. CHOCOLAAAAAATE!!!!!!
Okay.. so it doesn't rhyme.. in the gruffy words of my late Paw-paw LeBlanc.. "Big deal". If there's ever a time to splurge, it's on vacation. RIGHT?!?!? WRONG!!! I cannot take a 4 or 5 day vacation from eating right. REALITY CHECK.. I will not be putting tofu on the grill or putting bean sprouts on spinach leaves. I'm CAMPING for Christ's sake! LOL! I will tell you how excited I am about putting squash, asparagus and chicken on the grill; making cold avocado sandwiches; and eating fresh fruit right out of an ice cold cooler! What could sound more refreshing on a hot summer day? Besides, if I want to get in some morning exercises, Star Crunch and Dorito's just won't do. I am arming myself for battle! This is one of the toughest challenges faced when trying to change your lifestyle. There will be situations throughout my entire life where it is going to be a struggle with my will power. I've got to stay focused. I'm taking a vacation from work, stress, and chauffeuring children to dance recitals and baseball games.. NOT from my health! Fat does not take days off or cut you ANY slack. SWEET BABY JEEBUS JUST KEEP ME AWAY FROM THE SMORES!!! Lawd halp us all..

Confessions of a Recovering Overweight Drama Queen
This past weekend I celebrated my (8th Annual) 24th Birthday. :) My husband took me out for dinner and drinks. We split an order of some oh so delicious lamb chops and I had a side of grilled asparagus. It's a shame that the healthy food didn't cancel out the glass (or four) of wine that I had. :-/ BUT...... I DID make the waiter take back the chocolate cheesecake after I had two small bites! DID YOU HEAR THAT?????? Did you just HEAR what I SAID!? I GAVE BACK CHOCOLATE!! That's gotta count for SOMETHING, right?! :D /sigh.. Alas, sweets are still my down fall. This junk food junkie still exists somewhere inside of me. All I can do is smack her around every now and then and show her who's boss. Sometime that betch wins the battle, but I will win the WAR!

I am VERY EXCITED to report a 2 pound loss last week, bringing me to a total of 91 pounds gone! It is a struggle.. but I have to keep my mind right. Wish me luck on my vacation.. I will update you all next week on how well I stayed on target.. PRAY FOR ME!!! :D PLLLLEEEEEEEEZE! ..and good luck to you all in your weight loss journey this week.

A Turning Point

2010-05-26T18:40:00.000-07:00

I have reached a turning point on my road to a healthier lifestyle. I have had an overwhelming response to my many posts of food pictures, blogs, healthy meal suggestions, etc. It is the coolest thing since Greek yogurt! ;) When I began this over a year ago.. I knew the weight had to come off. But I didn't really realize what an impact this would make on my life. I didn't get the whole picture right away. I just knew that I was not happy with myself.. no matter how much in denial I was. Throughout the last 18 or so months, I've hit some very important milestones. I've accomplished things I had never even dreamed of. I have gotten into sizes that I'd never gotten into my whole adult life! I have pushed myself more and more to reach my goal.. and the more results I see the more motivating it is! I have some really terrific friends and a great support group which has also helped motivate me along the way. My biggest support is here at home.. though it wasn't always that way. When I made the decision to lose weight.. I very quickly made a plan of action that started with joining the gym and having someone to be accountable to. The only way I knew to make myself accountable and to not give myself an "out" was to tell MANY people. I told a huge group of my "internet friends", I blogged about it on my myspace, I signed up at Weight Watchers, I got a trainer.. all for the sake of accountability. I know that you can tell a small group of your closest friends and if you don't lose any weight or decide to give up.. that they'll let you save face and never bring it up again. I had to get out of that "loop hole" thinking. I had to bind myself to my commitment. There is NO WAY that I could tell this many people that I gave up. I have too much pride for that.. we probably all do. The funny thing is.. I didn't tell my husband right away because he'd heard me so many times talk about how I was going to start eating right, losing weight, etc. He knew that I was full of crap.. that the thought would last about a day.. and then POOF! gone.. I knew the only way to keep him from doubting me, was by showing him. Like they say.. Actions speak louder than words. And so it began..

The Chocolate Incident
Some days I feel like a recovering drug addict. There are just somethings that I can't touch or it will send me into a downward spiral in a matter of one day. IT'S CRAZINESS I TELL YOU! Well.. like a pipe to a crackhead.. chocolate seems to be my drug of choice lately. There are some of you that will totally get what I'm saying here.. and then there are the rest of you. The people that we love to hate.. the people like my husband who can watch a piece of chocolate cake grow mold on it before he ever has the urge for another 'sliver' of it. To all of you.. I loathe you and hope you choke on your dry moldy cake! LOL! I kid.. I kid.. The people like me can't allow stuff like this into our homes to sabatoge what we've worked so hard for! My tastes and cravings are constantly changing! While I've always been a huge fan of chocolate, it wasn't really truly my weak spot until recently. Or let's put it this way.. I didn't KNOW it was my weak spot until I took my blinders off! LOL! I don't descriminate! I will binge on chocolate pudding, poptarts, cereal, cookies, cake.. whatever is at my finger tips. I know that I know that I KNOW I will feel like holy hell afterwards.. but it doesn't stop me. The only way around it is to not keep it in my cabinets. Now sure.. when there is a party or whatever.. I can try and keep myself restrained from gorging on it.. but once the party is ovah.. in the trash it shall go. I don't care if it hairlips the POPE! This HAS to be done! My hubs may not be too happy about it.. but he'll get over it. It'll be moldy anyway. :) ..bastard. Anyway.. moving on..

Continuous Accountibility
There are the ones that have been there to offer their support from the beginning. The people who have read my blogs and kept up with me all along.. who are probably all sick and tired of hearing me go on and on about how much fun working out is, how eating healthy CAN be exciting, and probably secretly hope I choke on my hummus. :) I thank you all anyway. ;) From time to time, I see someone I haven't seen in a while and they start inquiring on how I lost so much weight and start reading my blogs, etc. In the last two or so months, I have realized that there are more eyes on me than I thought! I am seeing people that I haven't seen since last spring's ball practices, dance recitals, or whatever activities that come around once a year. Since my last blog on my myspace (and yes I still use it, but only to blog really.. now I have this! So.. buh-bye myspace!) I have had so many people asking for suggestions for meals, asking how I did it, do I have any advice, etc. I LOVE IT! Not because of the compliments.. althought I admit.. it does make me feel good.. Who wouldn't! Right?! It is so exciting because more and more people want to be healthy and help their family be healthy! I am so excited when people realize that you don't have to have Oprah's chef on staff, cook meals from stuff you've never heard of, or eat tofu to be healthy! It's not rocket science, but sometimes we need little reminders or someone to give us a new perspective on things! The more recipes I share, the more workouts I do, the more information I gather the more I realize that I HAVE made a lifestyle change! ..AND IT IS VERY EXCITING! I have turned my life around from the old me! Of course I still have to battle my demons ((coughcough))CHOCOLATE((coughcough)) but I can work through this! This is something that I can do for the rest of my life! The payoff is a long healthy active life and leading by example for my own family! It may not be all gone.. YET.. but it will be and I will have gained a new outlook on life and an awesome attitude! I am very excited about my new lifestyle revolution! Here's to weight lost and knowledge and happiness gained!

If you're on facebook.. I'd love for you to join my page and share your knowledge! :D

http://www.facebook.com/?ref=home#!/pages/Your-Lifestyle-Revolution/127576733921891

If you want to read past blogs.. go to http://blogs.myspace.com/luckyace7

ENJOY!