Once More Into The Void

McDonald's Mishagosh

noreply@blogger.com (Anonymous) — Thu, 30 May 2013 00:16:00 +0000

You would think that in today's climate where Social Media abounds company would be more accommodating in handling Customer Service issues. Especially when those issues are a direct result of interactions with the staff at their stores and restaurants. Sadly, this is not the case.

A few weeks ago, on April 27th, I walked into my local McDonald's to grab some lunch in between meeting with clients. I do not usually eat McDonald's because of my dietary restrictions (I live a dairy free lifestyle) but I had not eaten breakfast and was starving. I looked at their Dollar Menu and ordered a McDouble with no cheese and no pickles. I could not order a double hamburger since McDonald's does not offer that menu option.

I received my meal and sat down at a table. I unwrapped my McDouble to find no pickles and a big slice of cheese. I looked at the receipt and on the burger wrapper and both confirmed my order was placed properly by the cashier. I approached the counter and explained the error to one of the workers. She took the burger from me and went to speak to line cook. While I could not hear the conversation I did see the line cook start to laugh and walk to the back with the improperly prepared burger. Several moments later the same worker I handed the burger to handed me a new one. I returned to my seat, checked it and confirmed their were no pickles or cheese. I finished my meal.

After leaving the restaurant and heading towards my next client I became violently ill and had to stop at a store to use the restroom. Afterwards I cancelled my remaining appointments for that day and returned home.

I believe that the line cook did not prepare a brand new sandwich but simply removed the cheese and rewrapped the old sandwich. The next day I went to the McDonald's website (www.mcdonalds.com) and wrote a complaint through their automated form.

A few days later, on or about the 30th of April, I received a call from a representative from McDonalds. I could not understand everything she was saying because her accent was very thick but it was clear she was just reading from a script and going through the motions with no empathy for my situation.

"We here at McDonald's take customer service very seriously, sir."

"Tell me, do you know why I wrote my complaint," I interrupted. This was followed by moments of "ahhs" and "umms" and I heard paper shuffling in the background.

"You got sick or something, right?" she finally said.

I explained this did not make a good impression on me and politely ended the conversation.

A week later I received a call from Stephanie. Stephanie introduced herself as the manager of the store where I had the issue. She again apologized for the mistake. I explained that because of my dietary restrictions this was not a simple mistake, and I was lucky that I only got sick. Stephanie told me she she had talked with her staff and re-emphasized the importance of getting the order correct the first time. She asked me to please try her restaurant again and offered me a Be Our Guest card.

A few days later I received the Be Our Guest card in the mail. To my surprise the card was not for a free meal but a free breakfast or lunch sandwich. To me this seemed just like a major corporation nickel and diming, and doing the absolute least to retain a customer. In addition when I turned the card over I discovered that it was only valid at specific McDonald's restaurants and my local restaurant, where the issue took place, was not listed among them. To add insult to injury, three of the five restaurants listed were crossed out! I felt asking me to visit a restaurant that was not local to me in order to use the Be Our Guest Card was inconvenient and did not make me feel like I was a valued customer.

I decided to escalate the issue. I returned the Be Our Guest card in a letter I wrote and mailed to McDonald's Corporate offices on May 10th. I expressed my displeasure in the way McDonald's was choosing to handle this issue:

"I am extremely disappointed that McDonald’s has chosen to take this situation so lightly. There are many people who have dietary restrictions that require custom ordering. Enclosed, please find the Be Our Guest card you sent me as I will not be using it. I will not be visiting any McDonald’s restaurant in the future and will also make sure I let all of my friends with dietary restrictions know not to eat at your restaurants."

Several days later I received another call from the Store Manager Stephanie. She again expressed her sympathy that I was not satisfied. I explained my issue with the Be Our Guest and what if offered. Stephanie told me she had no control over the cards since they were a Corporate decision and she was only a franchise owner. She advised me that even though the cards say the are only valid a specific location "most" franchise owners are "pretty good" about honoring them. I explained that card did not state that and how was I, or any customer, supposed to know that. Stephanie asked me to please understand that her hands were tied with what she could do by Corporate policy and again assured me she spoke to her staff about getting orders correct. She again asked me to give them another try. I explained it was not worth my health to try again and this whole ordeal did not instill much faith in the McDonald's family. I told her that I appreciated the phone calls and the position she was in but I was not going to be frequenting any McDonald's any longer.

Yesterday, more than a month after the initial situation, I received a form letter from McDonald's Corporate Headquarters, signed by "David", advising me they received my complaint and that satisfaction is very important to them.

Really "David"? So far I count five failed attempts by McDonald's to make me, and others with dietary restrictions, feel like a valued customer. Putting a double hamburger on the menu and guaranteeing that french fries are prepared in their own deep fryer so there is no chance of cross contamination doesn't seem like a difficult thing to do. Giving customers who have had poor experience a less than $10 meal on the house to encourage them to visit again instead of only a $1.49 sandwich seems like a good trade off. Allowing customers to use the Be Our Guest cards at any location they choose instead of limiting their options seems like a no brainer to me.

When I was speaking with Stephanie she asked me to understand. I think you and McDonald's have it backwards, Stephanie. The customer does not have to understand. There are many dining options available who cater to customers with dietary restrictions of all kind. It is McDonald's that needs to understand they are not the only game in town.

I'll take my money to Subway, thank you.

Dairy Challenge: 2 Week Update

noreply@blogger.com (Anonymous) — Tue, 19 Mar 2013 20:13:00 +0000

It now has been two weeks since I started my Six Week Dairy Free Challenge. It's been an eye opening few weeks. I had no idea how many common, everyday items sitting on shelves in my pantry, refrigerator and freezer contained dairy or dairy by-products.

Over the first week (nicknamed my transition week) I threw out, gave away or cooked and gave to my room mate to bring to work with him tons of food. Some were obvious like frozen cheese ravioli and cheese blintzes, others surprised me. Here's a short list of foods I had no idea contained dairy or dairy by-products.

Quaker Instant Oatmeal
Nestle Instant Hot Chocolate Mix
Nutri-Grain Cereal Bars
Progresso Recipe Starter Cooking Sauces
Campbell's French Onion Soup
4C Bread Crumbs (!!)
Cheerios
Krustaz Pancake Mix

I also discovered that I could still eat fast food as long as I was careful. No more cheeseburgers at Burger King and Mickey D's but I could eat Whopper Jr's and Grilled Chicken Sandwiches. The local pizza joint became the equivalent of a meth den for me. Once my favorite place to stop and grab a quick, relatively inexpensive, lunch it is now "storefront non gratis" to me.

Subway is the friendliest dairy free fast food restaurant. There website has a breakdown of every sandwich, vegetable, cheese and sauce for allergen and dietary sensitivities and/or restrictions. To see a larger image of the chart on the right click here. Many of Subway's selections are dairy free or can be made dairy by removing the cheese or the sauce. My favorite sandwiches at Subway, the Black Forest Ham & Turkey, the Sweet Onion Teriyaki Chicken, and the Roast Beef are all dairy free if you remove the cheese.

Panera Bread also has some good dairy free options if you like salad. I met a few friends for dinner there the other night and got the Thai Chopped Chicken Salad. It was delicious and could have fed the entire state of New Hampshire!

As for non dairy substitutes for cow milk there are a bunch of choices: soy, almond, rice, coconut, hemp. After reaching out and asking for opinions I decided to try almond milk and I'm hooked. It has a creamier texture than the others and a nice nutty aftertaste. The vanilla almond milk stands up great to raisin bran and coffee! It's consistency is somewhere between 2% and whole milk. Overall, a very pleasant experience. And then I discovered liquid crack! Better known as chocolate almond milk. I could drink a container a day of the stuff.

This challenge has also stretched me as a cook. I needed to step out of my comfort zone and learn to cook differently and try different foods. An unforeseen byproduct of this challenge is thinking healthier about myself and my food. I started to buy fresh vegetables from the green grocer or the local farmer's market (yea, Union Square Market!!) and fresh fish to prepare that night. I have started to juice my own juice. Today I tried a combination of apples, red grapes, a banana, baby spinach and honey. It was a bit thick but very good.

Now for the vitals:

So far I've lost seven pounds! I have not changed any other aspect of my lifestyle. Before I started the challenge I did daily light calisthenics and stretching. I have not increased or decreased my morning routine.
I am sleeping through night. Before starting the challenge I regularly had bouts of insomnia. I would sleep for an hour or three a night and then wake up, toss and turn and try to get back to sleep. Since switching off dairy I'm sleeping like a baby. Well better than a baby actually. A baby wakes several times during the night. I slept like a baby before, not now.
My digestive health has improved. This is a delicate subject so let's just say the pendulum I used to swing no longer applies. I no longer need bran, Metamucil, or Pepto. 'Nuff said.
I have more energy.
I seem to be eating less. This is mostly an observation and may be biased but it seems like I am not snacking between meals and am eating smaller meal portions and not going back for seconds or thirds.

Until the next update, thank you for stopping by!!

6 Week Dairy Challenge: First Challenge

noreply@blogger.com (Anonymous) — Tue, 05 Mar 2013 18:35:00 +0000

Yesterday I wrote that I decided to take on a Dairy Free Challenge to see what effects it would have on my health, energy and weight. As a 47 year old man with a history of allergies, sinus issues, digestive challenges and forty pounds of excess hanging like an albatross around my waist I wanted to be proactive with my Quality of Life.

My first day went fine. A breakfast of oatmeal with vanilla and raspberry agave. Lunch was french fries and a large sweet tea from Mickey D's (I was running to see a client) and dinner was chicken pan fried in olive oil with honeyed carrots. Great, I could do this.

And then came this morning ...

I opened my refrigerator and saw dairy everywhere. A half full gallon of 2% milk. An open spreadable cream cheese. Margarine and butter. American, cheddar, mozzarella, and Parmesan cheeses. In my pantry there was products with whey - goodbye instant cocoa and granola bars! I opened my freezer and found frozen cheese ravioli and frozen pizza, not to mention the left over soups and sauces I froze after those dinners were over.

It was incredible just how much dairy was in my life.

I had two choices. I could empty my fridge and throw out almost everything or I could cook it all, eat a small serving as a farewell and then tell my roommate to take it to work. I couldn't throw it out and waste the food, not to mention the money that was already spent.

I boiled up the ravioli and couldn't eat more than two. The sight of them just turned me off. This week looks like will be a transitional week as I move from one lifestyle to a more healthy choice. I wanted to go cold turkey but the realities of how much dairy had infiltrated my daily life changed my mind.

It was an eye opening experience.

6 Week Non Dairy Challenge

noreply@blogger.com (Anonymous) — Tue, 05 Mar 2013 01:30:00 +0000

Last weekend I was visiting a friend of mine who lives in New Paltz, NY. Val has been a Vegetarian since she was in her mid twenties. She was telling me she decided to go Vegan as well. She has been Vegan since the first of the year and she swears by the results in both health and looks.

She mentioned that I should try to go Vegetarian or Vegan. I told her I love bacon too much and that I have a whole host of health issues that would probably make it impossible for me to do so. What, she asked, where my health issues?

I told her that I have chronic indigestion and heartburn. Intestinal and bowel issues. Chronic headaches and sinus issues. Not to mention a cholesterol tipping 400.

"Go dairy free," was her response.

"Dairy free? I love cheese and ice cream too much."

Val began to talk about various reports that showed why dairy isn't what the FDA said it was cracked up to be. She told me that milk companies add Aspartame to milk so it would be sweeter and more people would drink it, but no longer wanted to label the fact that the milk contained the carcinogen. Right now milk companies are required to label products that contain Aspartame. Studies have linked Aspartame, sold under the brand names Equal and Splenda, to cancer. Some researchers have found that artificial sweeteners alter brain chemistry and make people crave higher calorie foods, making people more prone to obesity and diabetes. I believe artificial sweeteners are a source of health related issues so this news made me more open to a dairy free lifestyle.

Val continued to tell me that since giving up dairy she slept better, had more energy, lower cholesterol and lost twenty pounds. I told her I would think about.

Later that night I did a little research with the help of Google. I found several articles like this one on HuffingtonPost.com by Mark Hyman, MD. Another article on the well known blog Vegan.com states:

"Dairy is bad news everywhere you look. Almost half of the calories in whole milk come from fat, and nearly all of its carbohydrates come from sugar. Worse yet, the fat in dairy products is every bit as saturated as the fat in beef. On top of that, dairy has absolutely no fiber or iron. And if all that were not enough, you might contemplate why the FDA refuses to answer the question about whether there is pus in milk products."

After one night of research I was ready to start my challenge. The question was where to find reliable information to help me steer in this new world I was entering. Was there alternatives to moo juice, cheese, and my beloved ice cream? Thankfully I found GoDairyFree.org.

This website is a wealth of information on everything you need to know about living dairy free. Product reviews, dairy free grocery store lists, favored products lists, and even fast food lists so you can know what chain restaurants to frequent or what to eat at Mickey D's, Chik-Fil-A, and Subway! Tomorrow I go shop for dairy free milk (soy and rice), dairy free cheese (tofu) and dairy free ice cream (coconut).

I've decided to take this challenge because I am no longer a spring chicken and I need to pay attention to my health before it requires me to do so. I will be posting regular updates so lets go to the vitals:

Weight: 173 lbs
Very high cholesterol
Chronic headaches
Sinus issues
Heartburn and indigestion
Digestive issues

It will be interesting to see where this lifestyle challenges leads. If you like to participate and see if a non dairy lifestyle is for you, there is a 10 day challenge over here.

The Soft White Underbelly of Christmas

noreply@blogger.com (Anonymous) — Sun, 23 Dec 2012 03:10:00 +0000

Seeing how this Tuesday is Christmas, it is time for me to dust off my personal tradition. I originally wrote this blog in 2007 when I was starting to put my life back together again. It is the story of the worst Christmas Eve I have ever known.

************************

I discovered this one Christmas Eve when I was dealing with my own demons. I couldn't sleep and instead of thoughts of sugarplums dancing in my head my mind was filled with images of murder and suicide. This scared me. After throwing a bottle of pills across the room I ran outside for some fresh air.

I stepped into the cold frigid early morning, the icy rain pelting my skin. I was greeted first by the cries of my upstairs neighbor. She was shrieking. Soul ripping cries of pain, beseeching God to, "bring him back. Please bring him back." I imagined she was clutching a pillow and davening. Thinking about a son or her husband.

As I walked around my community more cries assaulted my ears. A couple fighting. A mother crying. People drowning their pain in bottles. Everywhere there was despair and emptiness. These people, who plastered smiles on their face during the daytime, were living their own private hells on Christmas Eve.

After twenty minutes or so, I returned inside to the roaring silence. Alone, in the dark and in my own misery, I said a silent prayer for those like me. For those who Christmas is not a joyous remembrance. I cried tears of pain that night and fell asleep on the couch.

That night was seven years ago and still I remember. I no longer can look upon the holiday season as a warm embrace. From that night on I view Christmas with a touch of melancholia. Saddened, but still grateful for what I have.

Please remember your blessings not only on Christmas Day but everyday. Be grateful for your health and happiness and family.

Celebrate the fullness of your lives. Hug those you love. And take time to remember and pray for the silent cries of those less fortunate.

Five Minutes In Heaven

noreply@blogger.com (Anonymous) — Mon, 05 Nov 2012 21:29:00 +0000

In November of 1988 I was hit by car while crossing Francis Lewis Boulevard and the Sunrise Highway. The following story is a fictionalized account of the out of body experience that I had. Some may call this a Near Death Experience, I honestly don't know how to label it.

*********************************

The last thing I remembered hearing was the screech of tires and then the crunch of metal. I felt lighter, like Jenny Craig was finally working. A distant siren was blaring in the background and getting closer. I looked down. I saw myself lying in the street, bits of windshield scattered around me. There were cuts and abrasions all over my hands and face. Blood was everywhere. Strange I didn’t feel any pain. In fact, as I stood looking down at my broken body, I felt a calm detachment.

The car was totaled. Crushed like a beer can in the hands of a redneck on a Friday night. The siren got louder and louder and then fell silent. I watched the paramedics surround me, one shaking her head. It looked like they were securing me to a rolling table. An oxygen mask was placed over my nose and mouth. IV drips were attached to each arm. I saw myself being shoved into the back of the ambulance. The doors closed, the sirens blasted the skies and the ambulance raced off.

I didn’t even have to chase after it. I just thought about the ambulance and POP! I was in the back watching people monitoring my life signs.

“He’s in bad shape.” It was the lady paramedic who was shaking her head earlier.

“Blood pressure is seventy over fifty. He still is conscious. But dropping fast. Get him more blood and fluid.”

I thought how could I be both conscious and watching myself? I was having an out of body experience and not dead. Interesting. I looked down at myself. My mouth was moving. Was I talking, incoherent? I concentrated on myself. The words and thoughts came almost magically.

“One time one is one. One times two is two. One times three is three.” Too easy, I’m drifting.

“A, B, C. D, E, F, G.” Automatic, I don’t need to think.

“Z, Y, X, W, V, U, T” Q, R, S, T, U. “S, R, Q” Don’t slip into oblivion. Keep concentrating.

The ambulance stopped and the back doors opened. People came rushing through swinging doors and grabbed the table I was secured to and the IVs. I watched myself get rushed back through the same doors. Someone was yelling, “Ready O.R. 3”

O.R. 3 I thought and suddenly I was watching the surgeons. As I watched, one cracked my chest open and reached in to massage my heart, I could feel myself rising. I remembered the stories my mother used to tell me of being able to feel the soul of a body leave just before they died. She would place her hands an inch above the patient right before they passed and feel the soul push against her. I wondered if any of them felt me as I heard the heart monitor emit a flat beep.

It felt like swimming. It felt like soaring. I was everywhere and nowhere all at once. I was flying loop de loops and smiled. Free and happy.

I was moving towards a warm, golden light. Below me, the operating room had grown distant, dark and small. I saw someone on the operating table and felt a familiar tug but didn’t know why.

As I approached the warm, golden light I saw flowers and trees and butterflies and sunshine. My Uncle Irv was smiling. Aunt Ida hugged me. Ben shook my hand.

“Where am I?” I asked already knowing the answer.

“Home,” said Uncle Ben.

“Isn’t there a Gate with St. Peter or something?” I looked around.

Uncle Charlie laughed, “Only if you want it. You see Gary,” he continued. “The Afterlife is whatever you make it to be.”

Aunt Ruth walked up and grabbed Charlie’s hand. “Blue skies or crystal oceans. It’s up to you dear.”

“Even who you want to be with,” Irv said. “We’re here because you wanted us to greet you. In fact life is the same way. You are the creator.”

“And speaking of life,” Uncle Charlie said. “You’re not done yet. You still have much to learn and teach.”

“But what? What am I to learn?”

Aunt Ruth smiled, “Blue skies or crystal oceans. It’s up to you dear. As above, so below.” She kissed my cheek.

Again I was tumbling. Only this time there were no loop de loops. I saw the operating room grow larger and saw myself on the table. Above me the golden light still shone and it was still warm. I started to become aware of my toes and my fingers. I became aware of time. I became aware of myself. I felt integrated.

The heart monitor beeped. And beeped. And beeped.

The Not So Straight Path To Spiritual Awakening

noreply@blogger.com (Anonymous) — Tue, 21 Feb 2012 06:07:00 +0000

Spiritual awakening is not a one size fits all purchase. It's not a one and done event. The universe has a way of stretching you to meet your higher self. Even if you believe you are enlightened you will find there is still more to learn and share and teach.

My awakening started in 1988. I was 22 and was in a car accident that broke both my legs. The doctor's told me the damage was so bad that if I was hit by an American car, as opposed to a Nissan Sentra, the best I could have hoped for was paralysis. As it was, I would be able to walk again after intense physical therapy but I would always have a limp.

The doctor's were right. After three years of therapy, setbacks and challenges I was able to walk on my own without the aid of crutches, canes or walkers.

It was not a smooth journey. A few months after the accident my fiancee left me. Six months into healing, my bones were not knitting together as they should. After a year, my ankles were still weak. After two years the rod in my leg used to stabilize the bone was forcing it's way out. Even though everyone assured me this was impossible, it was happening and a second surgery was planned to remove the rod.

It was during those years my journey began. All the esoteric questions of "Who am I?", "Why am I?" were asked. As well as "How come bad shit happens to me? What did I do to deserve this?"

I started to read. I read everything. The Old Testament, the New Testament, and the Koran. I read about the Eastern philosophies of Buddhism, Taoism and Zen. I studied the works of Sigmund Freud and Carl Jung. I read Greek, Roman, Norse and Celtic mythologies, and the stories of Arthur and Merlin. Two books clicked with me and started to codify my beliefs into a way of life. Conversations with God by Neal Donald Walsh and Many Lives, Many Masters by Brain L Weiss, MD. It was Many Lives, Many Masters where I had my "Aha!!" moment.

Many Lives, Many Masters tells the story of Catherine, a patient of Dr. Weiss' who was undergoing hypnotherapy. During a session Catherine was regressed back to a past life. This was Dr. Weiss' first exposure to reincarnation and started him down his own spiritual path.

During one session Catherine was regressed to her death. While waiting for her to progress to her next life Dr. Weiss was startled to hear her start speaking in another voice. "Our task is to learn, to become God-like through knowledge. We know so little ... By knowledge we approach God, and then we can rest. Then we come back to teach and help others."

It was like a lightbulb went off in my head! This made sense to me. My soul started to sing. This was truth. For years I went to temple and for a few I went to church, but nothing taught to me there felt as right as the statement I just read. A calm peace descended on me. I had reached my first spiritual plateau.

But not the last.

As soon as my therapy progressed to the point were I could hobble along with a walker I started to socialize again. It was during this time I met my friend Deana. Deana was full of life with wicked eyes, a big smile and an infectious laugh. I was drawn to her immediately.

We started to hang out and visit new age and metaphysical bookstores. She loved crystals and I would like anything she did to get her to notice me beyond friendship. One night I watched as she read tarot cards for a bunch of her friends. "Here was a way in," I thought. "I could buy a tarot deck and ask her for lessons."

I ran out and bought The Merlin Tarot but when I asked if she could teach me Deana confided that she really didn't believe in tarot. She memorized the meanings from a book and put on a good show for some pocket money. I was crushed. I tried to teach myself but my heart wasn't in it. Still, the seed was planted for a later spiritual opening.

Many years passed and I had a on again, off again relationship with tarot. I found other ways to quell my spiritual searching. I discovered Tony Robbins through a late night infomercial and bought his Personal Power CD series. Through his CDs and books I discovered how my mind works and how to train it. I learned about anchors and pattern interrupts. I attended Tony's Unleash The Power Within seminar, as well as Life Mastery in Cancun, Mexico. I swam with dolphins and walked over 40 feet of hot coals.

At the same time I was learning about neuro-conditioning, I was reading the Conversations With God dialogs. The section where God explains The Tools of Creation and the Secret to Manifestation sounded a lot like what Tony was teaching in his CDs, especially his goal setting CD. I started to wonder how they could be so similar.

I also started to study Kabbalah and was learning about the Tree of Life. The diagram of the Tree of Life looked familiar to me. I grabbed my old Merlin Tarot deck off the shelf and pulled out the diagram cards that referred to the Three Spheres of the World and The Two Serpents. The images were the same!! The Tree of Life was identical to the images of the Two Serpents! The Three Spheres of the World hit the same major co-joined places. My second plateau was reached. Everything is the same. Or more correctly, one. Different cultures or times may call it different things based on understanding, but it's all the same. The only difference between spirituality, science, and magic is your level of understanding.

In 1999, I met the woman who would become my wife. I moved down to Jacksonville, Florida and in January of 2001 we wed. My wife came from a Baptist background so my tarot cards had to go back on the shelf. Even though my wife's family was Baptist, it seemed the women in her family shared a psychic gift, Her Grandmother was extremely empathic, her mother was precognitive and the best damn diagnostician I ever met. My wife could feel spirits. We spent many nights early in the marriage sharing experiences.

One night while my wife was showering, I was in the office on the computer. I felt a heaviness and a coldness hit me. Something felt off. I looked around and the office felt different. I sensed a presence of a girl. The wall behind the daybed was now redbrick. It was white painted drywall. The room felt hazy, as if it was between time and outside of reality. I walked over and felt the now brick wall. My fingers tingled. I heard my wife call me and answered I was in the office. I still searched the wall for the girl I was feeling. After around twenty minutes the trancelike feelings passed and I left the office to join my wife in the den. I found her sitting on the couch, drying her hair. She wanted to know why I was upstairs for over an hour!

"Why didn't you join me in the office," I asked.

Katie replied, "I walked in the office. You weren't there."

Another spiritual level reached. Although this one freaked me out.

In 2006 Katie and I separated, I was hearing the siren call of my Merlin Tarot but had not yet given into desire. "Why bother," I thought. "In almost ten years I've never connected with that deck."

I was walking my dog around the apartment complex and started to chit chat with an old Greek woman named Anne. It turns out Anne was a neighbor who lived across the parking lot. She had heard about my separation and told me she was sorry. She told me to bring Abbey back inside and then come over for a cup of coffee.

We were sitting on her patio smoking cigarettes and drinking coffee. I was unburdening myself of the miasma of mixed feeling I had towards my wife and the separation. Anne suddenly turned to me and asked, "Do you read the tarot cards?"

I was stunned. I never said anything about tarot and I just met this old woman 30 minutes prior. I told her I tried many times and was thinking about trying again. "Do it, " she said. "You have the gift. It's very strong."

That night I hopped on Amazon and bought my first Rider Waite tarot deck and a number of tarot books, including 78 Degrees of Wisdom by Rachel Pollack. I started the climb to spiritual plateau number four. It is years later and I have developed my empathic and intuitive gifts. I think I am reaching the top of that plateau.

But now life has let me now it's ready to ascend to another level of Spirituality. I have started a Spiritual and Tarot Consulting business. It is slow going and I have thought seriously about going back to a corporate 9 to 5 job.

I can feel I'm at a turning point and feel my logical self fighting with spiritual, psychic side. The universe has sent me several people to help me with my latest transition. Although I did not realize it until tonight, God has placed several woman in my path over the last few months. Each of the women are further along their spiritual and creative paths than me and each are here to help me, heal me, and teach me.

It's scary. This change feels different and more impactful then the others. Still, it looks like it's time to break the chrysalis and be reborn once again.

Thank you ladies. And be gentle.

The Soft White Underbelly of Christmas

noreply@blogger.com (Anonymous) — Tue, 20 Dec 2011 04:42:00 +0000

As this Friday is Christmas Eve it is time for my own Holiday tradition. I wrote this blog in 2007. I dust it off and post it every year to remind me of how far I have come and how grateful I am for everything and everyone in my life.

My hope is that by sharing this post you will, likewise, feel grateful for all you have in your life and that you will remember the less fortunate during this season of Peace and Love and say a little prayer.

Namaste -

*********************

I stepped into the cold frigid early morning. The icy rain pelting my skin. I was greeted first by the cries of my upstairs neighbor. She was shrieking. Soul ripping cries of pain, beseeching God to, "bring him back. Please bring him back." I imagined she was clutching a pillow and davening. Thinking about a son or her husband.

That night was three years ago and still I remember. I no longer can look upon the holiday season as a warm embrace. From that night on I view Christmas with a touch of melancholia. Saddened, but still grateful for what I have.

Please remember your blessings not only on Christmas Day but everyday. Be grateful for your health and happiness and family.

Celebrate the fullness of your lives. And take time to remember the silent cries of those less fortunate.

Fiends and Loathers

noreply@blogger.com (Anonymous) — Mon, 07 Nov 2011 16:17:00 +0000

It's been a rough stretch. Since December 2009, I have been downsized, evicted, lost a loved one and am trying to find myself again. I'm not going to lie - it's been a challenge.

With the exception of brief periods of contracted or temporary work, I am still unemployed with no money coming in. I have grown despondent over Corporate America and traditional employment. No longer wanting to put my future and my fate in other's hands. I decided to work for myself. The impetus to this decision was meeting a woman named Marguerite.

I met Marguerite several months ago at a Tarot Enthusiast get together. I have always been drawn to Tarot cards and have been reading for others for fun for over twenty years. Marguerite pushed me to read professionally. She helped me get my first reading gigs at psychic fairs, town fairs and in coffee shops. My confidence in my gifts and my skills grew and I knew I could succeed at this. I wouldn't be outrageously rich, but I could make a comfortable living doing what I loved.

Marguerite is also Wiccan. She is the High Priestess of a coven in upstate New York. Over the past few months I was welcomed warmly into their group. At no time did any covener try to convert me or turn me into a toad when I held to my own spiritual beliefs. I felt a kinship with these people. I felt safe and started to trust again. Trusting people by opening myself up and being vulnerable, and trusting people by entering into a working partnership with Marguerite.

Opening up is the hardest part of my journey so far. Since my divorce, very few people have seen my heart and soul, shared my hopes and dreams. People think I open up because I share things that happened in my life. But these are only events. Facts. When I share them, they are devoid of feelings. So beginning to open up again and share hopes and dreams, acknowledge weakness and be vulnerable in front of others was a big step.

It was also a wrong step.

My faith in the group and my decision to open up was mislaid. You see I kissed a girl. Unlike Katie Perry I didn't like it. Well really, the kiss never happened. As I leaned forward I heard her say no and then felt her cheek on my lips.

No big deal. It's what men and women do. You feel a connection with someone and you seize the opportunity. You take the chance. Sometimes you get kissed back. Sometimes you don't. It was what happened after.

I left to go back to the city and the rest of the coveners went to a local restaurant to eat. The next day I received an email from one of the group. He wrote to tell me he heard a rumor that I was interested in "the girl I kissed." He also let me know that while the others at the table thought I was ridiculous, and I was not in the same league as "the girl I kissed" he was on my side and he was rooting for me.

This got me angry. My private life was private. I quickly emailed him back asking what he heard and from whom. In my anger and before he could respond I also called Marguerite. I told her about the email I received and asked what happened over dinner. I wanted to know what had been said. She told me the "the girl I kissed" told her about the incident, the non kiss. Marguerite said that was all she knew and if I had any problems to talk with "the girl I kissed." I explained that talking with "the girl I kissed" was not necessary and that my private life was private. It was not public fodder and if it happened again I was gone. Out from the group and out from our business arrangement.

As I was ending my conversation with Marguerite my call waiting beeped. It was the friend who emailed me. I asked the same questions to him. He told me Marguerite told him about the non kiss and that others were discussing it at dinner. I asked him if "the girl I kissed" was at the table during these discussions. He could not remember.

What followed was several conversations of defer, deny and deflect. Many games of he said, she said, they said. It culminated with the friend who emailed me yelling at me and telling me I owed Marguerite an apology for ripping her a new one. He also told me I was a false friend and wanted nothing to do with me any longer.

After all the phone conversations I felt hurt and humiliated and very alone. I removed myself from all the social media sites that Marguerite had a presence. I was angry and frustrated and so damn tired of being strong.

All I did was was try to kiss a girl and got all this bullshit. It felt as if I was back in high school instead of being 45.

Sometimes I don't know if people are worth it. I want to believe they are, but then I get smacked upside the head with this mishagosh.

Have you ever hada Tarot reading? If so, how was the experience? If not, why?

noreply@blogger.com (Anonymous) — Sat, 22 Oct 2011 20:53:00 +0000

Have you ever hada Tarot reading? If so, how was the experience? If not, why?

Answer here

Five Minutes in Heaven

noreply@blogger.com (Anonymous) — Thu, 20 Oct 2011 05:18:00 +0000

This evening I attended an online Birthday Bash for psychic John Edward who turned 42. John created this free event to say thank you to all the followers of his newsletter. The evening was filled with questions and answers, personal anecdotes, and of course readings. While I did not get selected to get a read from John, the evening was fun nonetheless and the energies were great.

During the show, John mentioned that he is starting a new "Premium" section of his website called The Five. He listed the benefits and special content of the site, including a "Living Novel" exercise which sounds way cool. He also mentioned something called Five Minutes in Heaven. No, this is not the locked in a closet game we all played as kids. It is an exercise for us, you and me, to interact with John. We get to write stories based upon having only five minutes in heaven. What would you do? Who would you communicate with?

This also sounded cool. So cool in fact, that I stole the idea. After John's Bash was over. My brain was still on fire over the intriguing idea that he had given. Bolstered by Wil Wheaton's last post, I sat down and wrote for nearly two hours. Here is the result. I hope you like it.

******************************

Five Minutes in Heaven

The last thing I remembered hearing was the screech of tires and then the crunch of metal. I felt lighter, like Jenny Craig was finally working. A distant siren was blaring in the background and getting closer. I looked down. I saw myself lying in the street bits of windshield scattered around me. There were cuts and abrasions all over my hands and face. Blood was everywhere. Strange I didn’t feel any pain. In fact, as I stood looking down at my broken body, I felt a calm detachment.

I didn’t even have to chase after it. I just thought about the ambulance and POP! I was in the back watching people monitoring my life signs.

“He’s in bad shape.” It was the lady paramedic who was shaking her head earlier.

“Blood pressure is seventy over fifty. He still is conscious. But dropping fast. Get him more blood and fluid.”

“One time one is one. One times two is two. One times three is three.” Too easy, I’m drifting.

“A, B, C. D, E, F, G.” Automatic, I don’t need to think.

“Z, Y, X, W, V, U, T” Q, R, S, T, U. “S, R, Q” Don’t slip into oblivion. Keep concentrating.

It felt like swimming. It felt like soaring. I was everywhere and nowhere all at once. I was flying loop de loops and smiled. Free and happy.

I was moving towards a warm, golden light. Below me, the operating room had grown distant, dark and small. I saw someone on the operating table and felt a familiar tug but didn’t know why.

As I approached the warm, golden light I saw flowers and trees and butterflies and sunshine. My Uncle Irv was smiling. Aunt Ida hugged me. Ben shook my hand.

“Where am I?” I asked already knowing the answer.

“Home.”

“Isn’t there a Gate with St. Peter or something?” I looked around.

Uncle Charlie laughed, “Only if you want it. You see Gary,” he continued. “The Afterlife is whatever you make it to be.”

Aunt Ruth walked up and grabbed Charlie’s hand. “Blue skies or crystal oceans. It’s up to you dear.

“Even who you want to be with,” Irv said. “We’re here because you wanted us to greet you. In fact life is the same way. You are the creator.”

“And speaking of life,” Uncle Charlie said. “You’re not done yet. You still have much to learn and teach.”

“But what? What am I to learn?”

Aunt Ruth smiled, “Blue skies or crystal oceans. It’s up to you dear. As above, so below.” She kissed my cheek.

The heart monitor beeped. And beeped. And beeped.

Tough Decisions

noreply@blogger.com (Anonymous) — Thu, 03 Jun 2010 03:43:00 +0000

2010 has had a lot of ups and downs so far. More downs than ups.

It started with me being laid off from the job I had for five years and having to fight to get my unemployment. I finally did start to get my compensation in April but by then the damage was done.

Three months of rent, utilities, food, car insurance etc. out of savings: $4500 poof!
I had to address car and license issues: $1000 poof!
Trip to emergency room for heart attack: $2000 poof!

All of this added up to not being able to make my rent in May. I went and spoke to the Assistant Manager of my complex and arranged with her to pay both May and June's rent at the end of May on the 28th. When I arrived at the office last Friday with a check for $1200 in my hand I was told by the office manager that the assistant was let go for making arrangements with tenants she had no authority to do so. Further, the office manager refused to honor the verbal agreement I had entered into with the now former assistant manager. (I know, I know. Get it in writing!) She informed me that I was under eviction proceedings and the best thing I could do was to take my $1200 and find a new place to live. I was informed that the the eviction would not into default status until June 4th and then I had about a week or so before JSO (the cops) came to forcibly remove me from my dwelling.

I spent the Memorial Day weekend scouring craigslist and driving to see various properties. I was turned down on all of the places I looked at because when the prospective landlord called my current residency they where informed I was evicted. Today I looked at yet another place that was willing to look beyond the eviction situation but required one month's rent and a $300 pet deposit. All told, with the June rent I would need more than $1200 to move in!! Remember all that Poofing?

So now here we are. One week before I get tossed to the streets with nothing but the clothes on my back, my puppy and two cats. I called my family and friends begging for the $750 I was short to get to the necessary monies required to move. It seems money is scarce all over.

But all is not doom and gloom. My friend Austin offered to let me and my pets stay with him until I get back on my feet financially. The one hitch? He lives in Brooklyn, New York and I am currently in Jacksonville, Florida.

The decision I now face is to pack up everything and move away from the life I have built in Jacksonville. Over the last 10 years, especially since my divorce, I created a nice life with great friends. There is a little community called Five Points that is extremely diverse and creative. One of the coffee houses there has become a second home for me. It's a great little place to sit, have a cup of coffee and a smoke, talk with friends, listen to some great live music and just chill. It's also owned by a guy who worked for four and five star restaurants so the food kicks ass! I also was introduced to the world of independent wrestling and made some wonderful friends working in this unusual and tight knit community. I became involved with the community theatre scene and help create a wonderfully talented sketch comedy troupe. I had just started improv classes. I met great people all along the way.

I will miss them all and my heart is heavy. I have vacillated between staying and going all day. Some of my friends were understanding of my looming decision. Some took it hard. All were saddened.

As The Clash once sang, "If I go there will be trouble and if I stay it will be double." I need to make the final decision no later than Monday. I am leaning towards moving back north. There are pros and cons to both choices.

As I said, it's a tough decision.

Private Hells

noreply@blogger.com (Anonymous) — Sun, 30 May 2010 19:01:00 +0000

We all have our own private hells
Constructed from our fears and dreams
We blanket ourselves in darkness
And embrace each misdeed

Throwing off the covers of despair would show us the light
But the light just amplifies our own shortcomings

The choice is to stand in front of the mirror of the soul
To accept and forgive

or to remain in sweet penetrating darkness and sleep the sleep of helplessness

in dreams

noreply@blogger.com (Anonymous) — Sat, 22 May 2010 15:29:00 +0000

She comes unbidden to my dreams
Fiery hair, beguiling eyes, mischevious smile

She says nothing but seduces with her silence
A quiet girl with a fount of passion underneath

Standing still her promises are spoken through her soul
Eternal peace and contentment can be yours

The price is losing yourself in her eyes

Never to return

We can learn a lot from a duck

noreply@blogger.com (Anonymous) — Fri, 06 Mar 2009 13:51:00 +0000

Did you ever watch a duck on a pond?

They glide across the surface of the water effortlessly. Calmly moving without a care in the world.

What we don't see is the duck's feet pedalling quickly under the water.

It's the work we don't see that propels us forward.

Slow Cooker Black Bean Stoup

noreply@blogger.com (Anonymous) — Wed, 21 Jan 2009 23:24:00 +0000

It's 22 degrees here in sunny Jacksonville, Florida and that's perfect stick to your ribs soup weather. I had a bag of dried black beans and I love black bean soup so I decided to search the web (mostly food.com and a google search) for a recipe. I didn't find any that I liked so I opened my cupboards and refrigerator and played mad scientist. It came out pretty good. Feel free to try it and let me know what you think.

Slow Cooker Black Bean Stoup

1 16oz bag dried black beans
6 cups chicken stock
1 medium yellow onion (diced)
3 cloves garlic (sliced thin)
1 15oz can tomato sauce
1 carrot (shredded)
1 jalapeno (de-veined and de-seeded, diced)
3 tbsp chili powder
1 tbsp cumin
2 tbsp paprika
2 tbsp Kosher salt
pepper

2 bags Boil in Bag rice
tortilla chips (for garnish)
sour cream (for garnish)

Rinse and sort black beans. Place beans in slow cooker with three cups of chicken stock. Cook on high for two hours.
Add rest of chicken stock, vegetables, spices and tomato sauce. Stir soup mixture. Continue to cook on high for four to five hours. Puree soup in batches in blender or directly in the slow cooker with an immersion blender.

Serve over rice and garnish with tortilla chips and sour cream.

Serves approximately four.

The Secret

noreply@blogger.com (Anonymous) — Thu, 15 Jan 2009 20:16:00 +0000

The secret knowledge of the world is available to those who seek it
It matters not if you are a prince, pauper, beggar or thief
You need only to know how to ask your interest to pique it
You can change yourself - grow a new leaf

Alchemy is not about turning led into gold
It's not about getting rich
It's about transforming the young from the old
Soothing your soul and finding your niche

Do these things and you will find
You've become the Belle of the ball
And you will realize in your own mind -

There is no secret at all

The Jacksonville Social Tarot Club

noreply@blogger.com (Anonymous) — Fri, 02 Jan 2009 22:41:00 +0000

Ever since my separation and divorce I've become a bit of a Hermit. That would be the Major Arcana card that would best represent me. I know I need to come out of my shell and socialize again. To that end I started a Tarot Meetup Group in Jacksonville. The group went public this morning and our first get together is scheduled for January 25th.

If you are anywhere near Jacksonville, FL in the afternoon that day, join us. Grab a cup of java and join the fun.

The Jacksonville Social Tarot Club

The Soft White Underbelly of Christmas

noreply@blogger.com (Anonymous) — Fri, 26 Dec 2008 14:58:00 +0000

I know Christmas is a time of joy, love and family. A time of Peace on Earth and Goodwill towards Man. But there is another face to Christmas. One that is not shown on television, in Norman Rockwell portraits, or found in church pews. For many Christmas is a reminder of loss, of pain. It is a time that, by it's very family orientation; reminds people of what they lost. Or indeed, never had.

I discovered this one Christmas Eve when I was dealing with my own demons. I couldn't sleep and instead of thoughts of sugarplums dancing in my head my mind was filled with images of murder and suicide. This scared me. After throwing a bottle of pills across the room I ran outside for some fresh air.

I stepped into the cold frigid early morning. The icy rain pelting my skin. I was greeted first by the cries of my upstairs neighbor. She was shrieking. Soul ripping cries of pain, beseeching God to, "bring him back. Please bring him back." I imagined she was clutching a pillow and davening. Thinking about a son or her husband.

As I walked around my community more cries assaulted my ears. A couple fighting. A mother crying. People drowning their pain in bottles. Everywhere there was despair and emptiness. These people, who plastered smiles on their face during the daytime, were living their own private hells on Christmas Eve.

After twenty minutes or so, I returned inside to the roaring silence. Alone, in the dark and in my own misery, I said a silent prayer for those like me. For those who Christmas is not a joyous remembrance.

That night was three years ago and still I remember. I no longer can look upon the holiday season as a warm embrace. From that night on I view Christmas with a touch of melancholia. Saddened, but still grateful for what I have.

Please remember your blessings not only on Christmas Day but everyday. Be grateful for your health and happiness and family.

Celebrate the fullness of your lives. And take time to remember the silent cries of those less fortunate.

Vegas Vacation - An Embee Williams Adventure

noreply@blogger.com (Anonymous) — Thu, 27 Nov 2008 03:27:00 +0000

I awoke groggily, uncertian of the day or time. Hazy sunshine drifted through the dingy vertical blinds hanging on the window. Somewhere a siren sounded. I groaned and tried to rise. I looked down at my hand. It was pink and fuzzy and held a half filled bottle of Jack Daniels. What? In fact I was wearing a pink bunny suit!! Ears and all!! What did I do last night?

I remember arriving in Vegas and checking into my hotel. I walked the strip. Did some gambling. Took in some clubs. Bunny suit? Why would I be wearing a bunny suit?

I got out of bed and tripped over something on the floor. Cursing, I twisted to see what I fell over. It was a girl. A girl dressed in a skimpy silver bangled outfit and high heels. Oh my God, it was a hooker! There's a hooker asleep on my floor and I'm in a fucking bunny suit.

"Okay, remain calm." I grabbed the hooker's shoulder and gave a shake. She didn't stir. She must've been doing some really good stuff, I thought. "C'mon ... uhh," shit,. what was her name. "'Uhhh.. mam. Please wake up. You have got to go. I'll pay you for your time." But what I got for my money I don't remember.

The prostitute still didn't move. It was then I saw a small trickle of blood coming from her nose and mouth. "Oh shit! The bitch is dead. Oh Shit!" I started pacing. I heard the police siren again, closer this time. Were they coming for me? Fuck!!

"I've got to get out of here." I glanced around to take inventory of the room. My watch, wallet, car keys and cell phone were on the dresser, the dead hooker was on the floor. There were two glasses filled with melted ice and amber liquid on the nightstand next to the bed. A roach smoldered in the ashtry. I walked over, picked it up and sniffed. I don't smoke pot, I thought. Shrugging, I took a hit off the still lit joint and continued to take stock of the situation.

"Okay, Embee think. You have got to get out of here before the cops get here or the cleaning crew comes for the room. I need time to think." I snapped my fingers. The Do Not Disturb sign! I searched frantically for it. It was nowhere to be found. Finally, I opened the door and saw it hanging from knob. A maid turned from the down the hall. "Can I get you anything sir?"
"No thank you. I'm fine.
"Okay, I'll come to clean the room soon."
"No hurry," I blurted out. "I mean I'm relaxing and enjoying my vacation. Would you happen to know the time."
"9:30."
"Thanks." I slipped back into the room.

How was I going to get out of a hotel with a dead hooker without being seen? How did the hooker end up dead on my floor anyway!! One thing at at a time. How to get out? I sat on the bed and thought. I took a swig from the warm whiskey and thought. I took another hit from the joint and thought. I had it!

I grabbed my luggage, leaving one bag in the room. I opened the door and glanced up and down the hallway. No one. Good. I turned back into the room and looked at the hooker on the floor, "I'll be right back. Don't go anywhere."

I waited through an interminably long elevator ride to reach the lobby and walked to the front desk. "Leaving us so soon, Mr. Williams?" The too chipper clerk asked.
"Yes, I've got to cut my vacation short. Emergency back home."
"Well, we hope to see you back at The Beaches Casino on your next visit."
"Thank you." I handed the clerk my credit card and paid for the room.
The clerk asked for the room key. I started to hand it to him and said, "Oh I forgot a bag. Let me go back to the room, grab it and I drop off the key on my way to the garage."
"I can call a bellhop for you, sir." The damn clerk smiled.
"No! Uhh, no thank you. I could go back upstairs." I turned and started for the elevator.

I propped the dead hooker up on my hip and threw her arm around my neck. "God, dead people weigh a ton.." I started back down the hall. The couple in room 1405 were leaving their room. "Morning!" they loudly greeted me. "Great morning, ain't it."
"Morning," I whispered. "it would be a nice day except for the hangover. My friend here," I nodded toward the dead hooker I was dragging down the hall, "is still sufferring."
"Yeah," the business man next door ageed. "She looks dead on her feet."
*************************************
Will Embee make it out of the hotel with the dead hooker? Who killed her? And why is he wearing a pink bunny suit? These questions and others will be answered in the next installment of Vegas Vacation - An Embee Williams Adventure!!

I Know We Will Be Married

noreply@blogger.com (Anonymous) — Thu, 27 Nov 2008 03:01:00 +0000

When I met you for the first time you had yourself a man
But I fell in love anyways - against my better plan
Now I'm the kind of guy who would borrow, beg or steal
So before I go much further tell me, "Is your love for real?"

For I know we will be married - The invites have been written
I booked the hall yesterday - Please tell me you are smitten
I hired a photographer and baked the wedding cake
But not checking with the bride might be my big mistake

Now I could send you flowers, but he would send bouquets
I could give your hours, but he would give you days
I don't know how much longer I will sink before I swim
So please tell me that you're leaving - even on a whim

For I know we will be married - By Sandra Day O'Connor
If you don't want her as the judge she could be the Maid Of Honor
A Rabbi, Priest or Reverand - it's all the same to me
But I'll make a foolish bridegroom without a Bride To Be

So tell me that you love - through thickest and through thin
Just tell that you love me - if it only means in Sin
Tell me that you love me and it will be all right
We'll get married in the morning
And fight throughout the night

You're The Only Woman

noreply@blogger.com (Anonymous) — Thu, 27 Nov 2008 03:00:00 +0000

You ask me why I love you, as I look into your eyes
I tell you you're the only woman who can make me smile
I thank you for bringing meaning into my little life
I tell you all these tender things and that I want you for my wife

Cause you're the only woman who can make me feel this way
I'm so glad we met
Yes, you're the only woman who can brighten up my day
Meeeting you I won't regret

Holding hands and walking, just talking on the beach
I want to tell you everything, but the words seems out of reach
But still you are right near me, lying by my side
You fall into a peaceful sleep and I watch you for awhile

You're the only woman who can make me feel so glad
I'm so proud you're mine
Yes, you're the only woman, and now life it ain't so bad
Everythiing is fine

(Eight Bar Bridge)

Our life together will be one majestic grand parade
While other loves grow cold and die you know our love will not betray
I can't wait til forever to start eternity
I want you always by my side, you know I want you here with me

You're the only woman, who can make me feel this way
I do love you so
You're the only woman, who brightens up my day
I just wanted you to know

No Regrets

noreply@blogger.com (Anonymous) — Thu, 27 Nov 2008 02:57:00 +0000

Spoonfed morality and beliefs
Forks In The Road - Left or Right?
Jackknifed on a hairpin turn

Every decision draws you nearer to who you are
Every choice closer to destiny

There is no wrong
There are no false steps

There is only you and who you choose to be

Live in the moment
By the moment
For the Moment

Table your doubt
and Fill you Glass

Drink full of Life

No Regrets

Armor

noreply@blogger.com (Anonymous) — Thu, 27 Nov 2008 02:56:00 +0000

The Soul does not change
The innocence of Birth remains
Covered in the costumes of years

Dreamer, Artist, Architect
The Soul does not Change
We are as We were as Children
Laughing in Joy and Inspiration

Endless Loves we knew in Younger Days
Connections do not sever
Instead are buried 'neath the coverings of Life
Protections from Misdeeds of Betrayal and Lust

Chisel away the Leaden Armor of Lifetimes
To find our
True Self

Old Poem

noreply@blogger.com (Anonymous) — Thu, 27 Nov 2008 02:54:00 +0000

I am posting an old poem I wrote many, MANY years ago. I wish I could say that I found it in a box while cleaning out my attic. But sadly no, all the writing from my teens, twenties and thirties is gone; lost to many moves across three states.

Why this poem came back to my consciousness? Damned if I know, but something tells me that I need to share it. So here you are:

I watch you walk down the street
Your red hair blazing in the sun
Bouncing merrily in tune with your graceful stride

And I realize then that I love you

Not because you are the most beautiful
Nor because you are the smartest
Not even because of what you give me

But simply because you are you
And you take pride in that

The time you take to show me you world
The time you take to get to know mine

That is why I love you

And why I always will