One-liners

One-liners - Exercise caution when using sex toys.

Thu, 14 Sep 2006 21:16:36 -0700

Wind'ohs! Sucks More Cock Than A Toothless Hooker.

That goes without saying, of course. Windows XP (Which is what my laptop currently runs, but not for long.) is giving me nothing but trouble with certain CDs. As I have said before, I previously burned things I needed to have with me on a CD. Among these things were the scripts I had written for the comic. But my laptop will only read part of that CD, yet every other computer I have used reads it properly. And there are a few CDs that it won't read at all.

Fortunately, I was able to get the scripts I needed on to my USB drive and letter today's comic. On that note, in case anyone is wondering, Shishio's line in the third panel is supposed to be in a thought balloon. I know it looks nothing like one, but you try making one on a laptop.

Are you all reading Treading Ground and Jack of all Blades like I told you to?

I mentioned Treading Ground in a previous update, but it got buried under a lot of other things I mentioned, so I will, once more, link the three awesome strips I mentioned in that update, and a few more favourites besides.

Her Super Ex-Boyfriend

Also, the first act of Shooting War ended recently. Check it out.

by Shishio on Thursday, 14 September 2006 at 20:18:55

One-liners - Exercise caution when using sex toys.

Thu, 07 Sep 2006 23:17:10 -0700

Hello all.

Well I posted up this comic since Shishio has yet to appear. Maybe he got arrested for that comic? I'm sure he'll update us when he comes back. Anyways enjoy the comic.

Quote:
Well, I would feel rude posting this after what Datastrife wrote, since it would be pushed to the bottom, so I'll just edit it in here:
How's This For Blogging?
If you read the news posts, you will know that as of late, my personal circumstances have been such that I have been unable to letter the comic or maintain the site. And so I have been forced to impose on Datastrife, who was gracious and generous enough to allow the imposition. And I am, as I have said repeatedly, very grateful for his help.
But this past Sunday, I purchased a laptop. Last Friday, when I went to Futureshop to purchase a USB Drive, (Which was on sale for $19.99.) I picked up their flyer, which was advertising their Labour Day Sale deals. I noticed a laptop among these for only $499.99. I have wanted a laptop for a very long time, and I have actually been able to afford one for some time now, but I felt it would deplete my financial cushion (A very nice thing to have.) too much. And while I debated with myself whether to buy it or not, in all honestly, I probably made my decision as soon as I saw it in that flyer.
As I said, I have wanted one for a very long time, a desire that has only been fueled by having to rely on public access computers, and now that my situation has improved, and after having dealt with the frustration of being unable to work on my projects, and, let's face it, surf the internet as much as I want, I could no longer resist the temptation. Also, I had always planned on getting a refurbished one when I did finally make the decision to purchase one, but here Futureshop was offering brand a brand new laptop at the same price as an equivalent one would be at Factory Direct. And of course, assuming I can obtain a T4 from one of my previous employers, I'll finally be able to file my taxes for the last two years, which will more than cover the cost. And I used the word "and" way too many times in this paragraph. Hey, I don't claim to be a great writer.
So I went to FutureShop intending to buy the one for $499.99, and the salesman advised me to buy a slightly more expensive model, (For $581.99. It's actually pretty much the same as the other. The processor is a little faster, and it has twice as much RAM.) his argument was that Windows Vista would be coming out soon, and the more expensive model would be abe to run it. I clearly stated my preference for Linux, saying I was definitely not going to get Vista, and he later reiterated the Vista argument, which of course did nothing to convince me, but the thought that it would be wiser to spend a little more now to get more RAM than later pay a small fortune to upgrade or obtain a new laptop did.
And I must say, it is a very nice thing to have. It's great to be able to access a computer and do things I want/need to at my leisure. And to have more privacy whiledoing them. I mean, given the content of the strips, can you imagine how I felt typing scripts at a public computer station? Especially when I had to write strip nineteen. That was hell. And Wi-fi hotspots are more abundant than I expected they would be, which is excellent.
Anyway, I am, as they say in the vernacular, back in the saddle. Or at least as far back as I'll ever be. I will be lettering the strips again soon. How soon depends on how much work Datastrife has already done.
That's it for tonight. Sorry for blogging.
- Shishio

by on Thursday, 07 September 2006 at 18:24:54

One-liners - Exercise caution when using sex toys.

Thu, 31 Aug 2006 21:03:50 -0700

How The Mighty Have Fallen.

I have finally surrendered to the dark side and signed up on MySpace. Here is my page.

I never wanted to have anything to do with MySpace, given the reputation of the site and a great deal of its users, but I am apparently willing to do almost anything to promote my comic.

It's funny, I have never liked the idea of blogging, which is why I did not previously sign up on sites like LiveJournal and MySpace.

I know this is going to come across as very ignorant, arrogant, and insulting to many people, but I hope you will all believe me when I tell you that is not my intention. (Well, I mean to be a little insulting to a select group of people.) But I have to be honest here.

I remember when services like Live Journal and MySpace first appeared on the internet, and I remember how people flocked to them. And I remember knowing that a great deal of pathetic emo teenagers made liberal use of these services to make their pathetic, asinine writing available to an uncaring public as if they were important.

I wanted nothing to do with that.

As you can surmise, I have always looked down on blogging. (Emo/asinine blogging, to be more specific. Blogging is fine if you have something worthwhile to say and can say or write it well enough.)

And to be absolutely clear, I am not insulting everyone that has a blog. In fact, while I can't think of any, I'm sure there are some very awesome blogs and bloggers. (In fact, feel free to tell me about them.)

But despite the knowledge that I shouldn't be so bigoted, I can't help myself.

And yet, in actuality, I have, to some extent, been blogging for a long time, be it on message boards, any of the sites I ran before, etcetera. And of course, this site. Hell, I'm doing it right now.

Yes, I'm pretty fucked up, thanks for asking.

by Shishio on Wednesday, 30 August 2006 at 17:41:11

One-liners - Exercise caution when using sex toys.

Thu, 24 Aug 2006 21:32:45 -0700

You Know, He Never Answered My Question...

I would like to clarify some things:

My request for help from Canadian Lawyers was not made in jest.

I hate to reveal my plans before they see fruition, because for some reason, nearly every time I do that, they fail, but it seems necessary to say that I intend to publish the comic I spoke of in paper form. I may put it on the internet as well. And hopefully my having said that won't destroy all chances of it happening.

Thank you to everyone who got in touch in me, but I still wouldn't mind hearing from others. (The more opinions I have, the better.)

Second item of business. I wish to change my name, but am having a hard time making a decision. If you know of any resources that may help me, such as good naming sites, (None of that shitty baby name site bullshit.) please let me know. I would like a nice-sounding, unique name that would suit a caucasian male. Some names I like are (In no particular order.) Damon, Damien, Larsen, Brynden, Dorian, Elric, Hunter, Landon, and Bryant. (Yes, I realize those names aren't particularly unique. If I knew of some good ones, I wouldn't be asking for assistance.)

Third item of business. You may like Treading Ground. Here are some strips I particularly enjoyed:

Her Super Ex-Boyfriend, Superman in Gotham, Yaoi Explained.

See you next week.

by Shishio on Monday, 21 August 2006 at 09:01:02

One-liners - Exercise caution when using sex toys.

Thu, 17 Aug 2006 23:14:17 -0700

Anyone A Canadian Lawyer?

I have a legal question.

If you were doing a satire comic, and included a scene where an important political or social firgure was raped off-panel, could you face legal trouble? (Well, I suppose it's almost certain I would, I'm concerned about losing in court, and/or going bankrupt.) Is there a way to write such a scene so as to avoid such trouble?

Let's say, hypothetically speaking, that after expressing disagreement with the actions America took in Iraq (This is purely a hypothetical question, let's not turn this into a political discussion.) through my satirical writing, I then added insult to injury by including a scene where the president was raped off-panel by terrorists. What might happen?

(I figure I would get sued so hard my bank would explode, but I wanted to ask.)

If you know anything about this, please e-mail me.

by Shishio on Tuesday, 15 August 2006 at 08:52:24

One-liners - Exercise caution when using sex toys.

Fri, 11 Aug 2006 08:59:21 -0700

One More Thing.

In my previous update, I forgot to plug The Day It Snowed, which is about Waf's (Who appears in Jack of all Blades.) adventures before he joins up with Tsai.

by Shishio on Friday, 11 August 2006 at 08:23:39

Caulk Is Fantastic.

Since, other than thanking Datastrife again for his help, (Thank you Datastrife.) I don't have much to say, I'll talk about other webcomics.

The Perry Bible Fellowship has a new domain and sports a new website design. It is also the best webcomic I have seen to date. Check it out.

And once again, I will plug Jack of all Blades for the sake of the estimable Zachary Lewis, who has been a big help to me. I think of JaB as an 8-bit Theater light.

Also, three other comics I read, Darken, Sorcery 101, and Yirmumah have been spotted, as they say in the vernacular. Congratulations to their creators.

Finally, I want to ask what's up with the recent dearth of comments?

That's it. Thank you for reading, (And hopefully forcing the comic on everyone you know.) and all that.

by Shishio on Thursday, 10 August 2006 at 09:09:41

One-liners - Exercise caution when using sex toys.

Thu, 10 Aug 2006 23:02:04 -0700

Caulk Is Fantastic.

Since, other than thanking Datastrife again for his help, (Thank you Datastrife.) I don't have much to say, I'll talk about other webcomics.

The Perry Bible Fellowship has a new domain and sports a new website design. It is also the best webcomic I have seen to date. Check it out.

And once again, I will plug Jack of all Blades for the sake of the estimable Zachary Lewis, who has been a big help to me. I think of JaB as an [http://www.nuklearpower.com]8-bit Theater[/url] light.

Also, three other comics I read, Darken, Sorcery 101, and Yirmumah have been spotted, as they say in the vernacular. Congratulations to their creators.

Finally, I want to ask what's up with the recent dearth of comments?

That's it. Thank you for reading, (And hopefully forcing the comic on everyone you know.) and all that.

by Shishio on Thursday, 10 August 2006 at 09:09:41

One-liners - Exercise caution when using sex toys.

Fri, 04 Aug 2006 06:17:28 -0700

Lest I Forget.

Today's comic, as you can see from the credits, was lettered by Datastrife. So let's all thank him for helping out.

And we are back on Webcomic Battle today.

by Shishio on Friday, 04 August 2006 at 08:59:00

Don't You Just Love A Nice Breeze?

As I mentioned in the last update I posted, One-liners is now listed on Online Comics and Choice Comics. If you love webcomics and do not have an account on these sites, then you should be ashamed of yourself. Redeem yourself by signing up on these sites posthaste. And if you like One-liners, add it to your favourites and post comments, reviews, whatever.

Also, after a very disappointing start, I am participating in Webcomic Battle again. This time, I used the first strip, and I have had much better results. We have won our first four battles, but we have been taken off of the roster today. I guess an odd number of strips were entered, and they had to make room for a new one. But if you voted for me, thank you.

by Shishio on Thursday, 03 August 2006 at 09:24:45

One-liners - Exercise caution when using sex toys.

Thu, 03 Aug 2006 22:20:06 -0700

Don't You Just Love A Nice Breeze?

by Shishio on Thursday, 03 August 2006 at 09:24:45

One-liners - Exercise caution when using sex toys.

Tue, 01 Aug 2006 10:22:10 -0700

Stuff.

Hello everyone. I am participating in Webcomic Battle again, and am having better luck this time. The first strip has won its first two battles, although the one we are presently engaged in is very close at the moment. But that's OK, I got much more hits from the site this time.

I submitted One-liners to the index site Choice Comics, (Too lazy to find the link.) which is a new index site for webcomics. Check it out. Also, we are finally on Online Comics, so if you are a member there and like the comic, add it to your favourites. If you're not, sign up already.

by Shishio on Tuesday, 01 August 2006 at 09:12:05

One-liners - Exercise caution when using sex toys.

Thu, 27 Jul 2006 23:57:48 -0700

One-liners - Exercise caution when using sex toys.

Fri, 21 Jul 2006 00:06:52 -0700

Evisceration Is One Of My Favourite Hobbies

I'm not sure if this strip will be as well received as the others up to this point, but at least you get to learn something about me.

Also, as I said last week, I am leaving comic lettering and site maintenance duties to Datastrife. So let's all thank him for helping out. As of Monday, I have been away from my computer and regular internet access, and will most likely be for some time. But I intend to keep the comic running as scheduled.

by Shishio on Monday, 17 July 2006 at 08:08:15

One-liners - Exercise caution when using sex toys.

Mon, 17 Jul 2006 06:02:42 -0700

WCCA Winners.

Although the ceremony is behind schedule, the winners of the Webcartoonists' Choice Awards have finally been announced.

It's good to see that most of the comics I voted for won.

by Shishio on Monday, 17 July 2006 at 06:55:06

The Battle Has Begun.

And I am fighting Satan himself.

by Shishio on Sunday, 16 July 2006 at 00:37:32

A Call To Arms.

I would like to direct your attention to Webcomic Battle. Webcomic Battle is a site that randomly pairs submitted webcomics and invites visitors to vote for the best. There are multiple rounds held every day. To see them all, you either have to vote in every one, or keep refreshing the page.

I have submitted the seventh One-liners strip. It's profile is here. It has yet to be paired with an opponent strip, but when it is, I hope you will cast your vote on Webcomic Battle. If you think the strip I submitted is the better one, then vote for it. If not, vote for the other, or call it a tie. If I am to win, I want to do so fairly. All I am asking is that you take the time to participate in the battle.

Also, I have an important announcement. I am leaving the comic lettering and site maintenance duties to a man that goes by the name Datastrife. So make sure to give him almost as much respect and adulation as you would to me, because without his help, I might very well have to post blank comics with the script in the newsbox. And wouldn't that suck?

by Shishio on Saturday, 15 July 2006 at 20:03:36

More Dildo Goodness.

Here is the most, in my opinion, depraved One-liners strip yet. Will we ever top it? I think we can, but only time will tell. You guys seem to love your depravity, so I hope you will continue along the ride with us.

My advertising campaign ended today, so I want to welcome all our new readers (Yet again.) and say thank you for checking out One-liners. I also want to thank Ghastly, who, because he was extremely busy, kept the advertisement for the comic up on his site longer than I paid him to.

In other news, I have recently learned that One-liners is the largest direct referrer for Jack of all Blades, which is awesome, because I can feel like I'm somehow repaying Zachary Lewis, one of Jack's co-creators, to some small extent for helping with the site. I hope that I will remain Jack's largest referrer, so if you like fantasy comics, check it out. And if you like anthropomorphic penguins, check out The Day It Snowed.

Also, as you may or may not know, the final voting round for The Web Cartoonist's Choice Awards ended this past Monday.

Since I am now a webcomic creator, er, writer, (Close enough.) I had the honour and privilege of participating this year.

And because my opinions are of superlative importance, I would like to share who I voted for:

As great as it was to have been able to participate, it was also annoying as I had to evaluate all of the comics for the sake of fairness. Which means I spent quite a few hours reading a lot of webcomics. I realize that doesn't sound so bad, but since I was mostly reading to determine who I believed deserved to win in each category, it was something of a chore.

But I digress. Here are my thoughts on some of the categories:

Outstanding Newcomer:

This was a hard choice between Gunnerkrigg Court and Parallel Dementia.

Outstanding Artist:

This was a very tough choice between Michelle Mayo and Nicholas Gurewitch. Michelle Mayo is an absolutely incredible artist, her lineart and colouring are amazing, but I voted for Nicholas Gurewitch because he is such a versatile artist. That man is like unto a god.

Outstanding New Character Design:

I voted for Templar, Arizona because I feel its characters are the most realistic.

Outstanding Environment Design:

While I think the backgrounds in Templar, Arizona are very well done, I voted for Copper because it is more diverse in the environments it uses.

Outstanding Use of Colour:

I think just about any of the candidates could win this one.

Outstanding Writer:

I voted for Ryan North because he is able to write a plethora of comics using the same six panels over and over again. Limiting yourself that much, and still achieving success is quite remarkable.

Outstanding Character Writer:

Again, I voted for Templar, Arizona because its characters are the most realistic.

Outstanding Science Fiction Comic:

I might have voted for Daedalus Blue if its website wasn't fucked and I had been able to read more than one page.

So what are your thoughts? Who did you vote for? Or, if you did not vote for whatever reason, who would you have voted for? Discuss.

by Shishio on Thursday, 13 July 2006 at 23:01:13

One-liners - Exercise caution when using sex toys.

Sat, 15 Jul 2006 22:03:14 -0700

The Battle Has Begun.

And I am fighting Satan himself.

by Shishio on Sunday, 16 July 2006 at 00:37:32

A Call To Arms.

by Shishio on Saturday, 15 July 2006 at 20:03:36

More Dildo Goodness.

Also, as you may or may not know, the final voting round for The Web Cartoonist's Choice Awards ended this past Monday.

Since I am now a webcomic creator, er, writer, (Close enough.) I had the honour and privilege of participating this year.

And because my opinions are of superlative importance, I would like to share who I voted for:

But I digress. Here are my thoughts on some of the categories:

Outstanding Newcomer:

This was a hard choice between Gunnerkrigg Court and Parallel Dementia.

Outstanding Artist:

Outstanding New Character Design:

I voted for Templar, Arizona because I feel its characters are the most realistic.

Outstanding Environment Design:

While I think the backgrounds in Templar, Arizona are very well done, I voted for Copper because it is more diverse in the environments it uses.

Outstanding Use of Colour:

I think just about any of the candidates could win this one.

Outstanding Writer:

I voted for Ryan North because he is able to write a plethora of comics using the same six panels over and over again. Limiting yourself that much, and still achieving success is quite remarkable.

Outstanding Character Writer:

Again, I voted for Templar, Arizona because its characters are the most realistic.

Outstanding Science Fiction Comic:

I might have voted for Daedalus Blue if its website wasn't fucked and I had been able to read more than one page.

So what are your thoughts? Who did you vote for? Or, if you did not vote for whatever reason, who would you have voted for? Discuss.

by Shishio on Thursday, 13 July 2006 at 23:01:13

One-liners - Exercise caution when using sex toys.

Fri, 14 Jul 2006 00:05:16 -0700

More Dildo Goodness.

Also, as you may or may not know, the final voting round for The Web Cartoonist's Choice Awards ended this past Monday.

Since I am now a webcomic creator, er, writer, (Close enough.) I had the honour and privilege of participating this year.

And because my opinions are of superlative importance, I would like to share who I voted for:

But I digress. Here are my thoughts on some of the categories:

Outstanding Newcomer:

This was a hard choice between Gunnerkrigg Court and Parallel Dementia.

Outstanding Artist:

Outstanding New Character Design:

I voted for Templar, Arizona because I feel its characters are the most realistic.

Outstanding Environment Design:

While I think the backgrounds in Templar, Arizona are very well done, I voted for Copper because it is more diverse in the environments it uses.

Outstanding Use of Colour:

I think just about any of the candidates could win this one.

Outstanding Writer:

I voted for Ryan North because he is able to write a plethora of comics using the same six panels over and over again. Limiting yourself that much, and still achieving success is quite remarkable.

Outstanding Character Writer:

Again, I voted for Templar, Arizona because its characters are the most realistic.

Outstanding Science Fiction Comic:

I might have voted for Daedalus Blue if its website wasn't fucked and I had been able to read more than one page.

So what are your thoughts? Who did you vote for? Or, if you did not vote for whatever reason, who would you have voted for? Discuss.

by Shishio on Thursday, 13 July 2006 at 23:01:13