Kneale Mann | Leadership

We Can’t Ignore It

2026-04-09T12:09:00.022-04:00

There’s a shift happening right now. We don’t fully understand it or where it’s going, but ignoring it isn’t an option. Artificial Intelligence isn’t just a headline. It’s changing how we work, think, create, and value ourselves. And the number of self-proclaimed experts on the topic are growing daily.

The Pressure Is Real

AI can write, design, analyze, and automate faster than we can. Tasks that once took hours now take minutes. If a machine can do what we do, where do we fit? People said that about the automobile and the personal computer but this is much different.

As Fei‑Fei Li (Stanford Institute for Human‑Centered AI), said, “AI is not just about machines, it’s about augmenting human potential.” Even powerful tools are meant to empower, not replace us. We shall see.

Where Value Is Shifting

AI can replicate patterns, but it doesn’t live a life. It doesn’t feel uncertainty or wrestle with tough decisions - that’s where real value lies. For now.

Oren Etzioni (Allen Institute for AI), reminds us: “AI is neither good nor evil. It’s a tool. It’s a technology for us to use.” Technology itself doesn’t define value - people do. We win by using AI as a tool while doubling down on what makes us human: judgment, taste, experience, and curiosity.

Authenticity Wins

As AI makes content easier, authenticity becomes more valuable. When everything sounds polished, what’s real stands out. Deciphering what's real is the challenge.

Kevin Scott (CTO Microsoft) notes: “We underestimated how fast AI would go from fun to essential.” The shift isn’t coming; it’s already here, reshaping expectations.

Don’t Replace Ourselves

AI can help us move faster, but it can’t build trust or replace relationships. Yet.

It’s a tool, not a strategy. The risk may not be that AI replaces us. Life is more than output and efficiency and AI still can’t define meaning. At the moment.

Or I may be full of it because we don’t know what’s next.

Quiet the Critic

2026-03-24T14:08:00.000-04:00

Self‑doubt has always been one of my biggest challenges. Even when things seem on track, I catch myself hesitating or wondering if I’m really capable. Self-doubt shows up in big decisions, creative work, or even everyday choices.

Up to 85% of people feel like imposters at some point. A 2020 study in Personality and Individual Differences found frequent social comparison fuels hesitation. Recognizing this helps us notice patterns and adjust before it slows us down. Easier said than done.

Small Wins Matter

Breaking big goals into smaller steps - called “success scaffolding” - is surprisingly effective. A 2018 Journal of Experimental Social Psychology study showed celebrating tiny wins boosts confidence and reduces anxiety. Tracking small milestones makes even big challenges feel manageable and builds momentum. The way you speak to yourself sets the tone for what you achieve.

Clinical Psychological Science found neutral, compassionate self-talk (“I can figure this out” instead of “I always fail”) strengthens resilience. Catching negative thoughts and reframing them - even out loud—helps you respond differently under pressure.

Track and Interrupt Patterns

Logging moments of self-doubt helps you spot triggers like perfectionism or looming deadlines. Awareness turns automatic hesitation into intentional action, giving you the power to act instead of freeze.

Small wins, kinder self-talk, pattern tracking, and leaning on constructive feedback help you move forward despite doubt. It’s not about being fearless - it’s about choosing progress over fear and trusting yourself along the way.

Sometimes we have to build confidence.

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Priorities and Aging

2026-03-10T14:21:00.000-04:00

I’ve noticed my priorities have changed a lot over the years. What mattered most in my 20s doesn’t carry the same weight today, and I suspect you’ve felt that too. Life has a way of reshaping what feels urgent versus what feels meaningful. What was SO important years ago barely makes a blip now.

Research shows that as we age, our values and goals naturally shift. A 2017 study in Psychology and Aging found that older adults tend to focus more on meaningful experiences and relationships, while younger adults emphasize exploration.

Small Shifts Create Big Clarity

Even small adjustments in priorities can make a big difference. The same study found that people who consciously reflected on what mattered most experienced less stress and greater satisfaction. Taking time to list our top priorities can help us act intentionally instead of reacting to every demand or distraction.

When priorities feel unclear, it helps to ask, “Does this align with what matters most to me?” Research from Developmental Psychology shows that aligning decisions with personal values increases well-being and long-term satisfaction. Pausing to reflect before saying yes to something can save time, energy, and emotional strain.

Patterns Reveal What Matters

Tracking how we spend our time and energy helps us spot what consistently feels rewarding versus draining. Awareness of these patterns allows us to focus on what truly contributes to growth, relationships, and fulfillment, rather than what just seems urgent in the moment.

Even as priorities shift with age, we can stay intentional about what matters most. And what's important today may not be years from now.

Let's make today count.

Respect

2026-02-17T15:57:00.000-05:00

Respect is often framed as politeness or being nice; when in reality it's one of the hardest disciplines in business — and one of the most effective. Respect shows up before a deal is signed or a problem appears. It’s how we listen when someone disagrees. How we talk about people who aren’t in the room. And how we behave when pressure is high and patience is low.

In my work with business owners and managers, one pattern is consistent: organizations that struggle to grow often struggle with respect. Not from bad intentions, but from underestimating its impact. Authority gets confused with credibility. Speed gets mistaken for effectiveness. Respect is assumed instead of earned.

It Doesn't Just Happen

Respect is built in small, repeatable moments – being prepared, showing up on time, answering clearly, giving credit, owning mistakes. These actions don’t draw attention, but they quietly shape culture. Respect must also flow both ways.

Leaders who demand it without giving it create compliance, not commitment. Teams that feel respected think harder, solve problems sooner, and care more about outcomes. It also means being honest. Not blunt for ego’s sake, but clear to prevent confusion.

Beat Them with Kindness

Ghosting may be the new “no” and a way to avoid difficult conversations. And most of us do it – intentionally or unintentionally . Avoiding tough conversations may feel right in the moment, but it usually creates bigger problems later. In business, respect becomes a competitive advantage.

Customers notice it. Partners remember it. Employees protect it. It turns transactions into long-term relationships and reduces friction before it becomes conflict. We don’t earn respect by demanding it. We earn it by practicing it – especially when it’s inconvenient. And once it’s part of how we operate, everything else gets easier to build.

I say with respect, of course. ____________________________________________________________

It's Business. It's Personal.

2026-02-09T15:35:00.006-05:00

If you’ve spent any time around me in a boardroom or mid-conversation about growth, you know I believe one thing deeply: Business is personal. Not transactional. Not automated. Personal. I work with numerous business owners and managers across different industries.

Some run multi-generational companies. Others are scaling fast and trying to manage growth without losing control. Different pressures. Different personalities. Same truth. The businesses that win are the ones that make it personal.

It’s Not Just Marketing. It’s About Meaning.

Marketing is not an event or a campaign; it is an essential piece of your business. We can talk strategy, positioning, and ROI all day. But beneath that, we’re talking about legacy and the responsibility they carry. That’s personal.

When you understand that, you stop selling services. You start building partnerships.

You are the Brand

Business owners often underestimate how much they matter to their marketing. People don’t just buy products. They buy stories. Trust. Connection. Why you started. What you believe. Why you care. That’s not fluff. That’s differentiation. And in a crowded market, differentiation is oxygen.

AI, automation, and efficiency tools are everywhere. I like them. I use them. But you can automate distribution. You cannot automate connection. The businesses that thrive won’t be the loudest; they’ll be the most human.

Actions Speak

How you treat staff. How you answer the phone. How you handle complaints. That is your brand. Culture leaks into the marketplace whether you plan for it or not.

When I meet an owner, I ask: “Why did you start this?” The answer is almost never money. It’s family. Freedom. Pride. Impact. It's especially interesting when you pose the same question to their team. Then you find out what it means to work there far beyond the paycheck. People rarely do business with logos; they do business with people.

And that will always be personal. ___________________________________________________________

A.I. + A.I.

2026-01-23T11:00:00.012-05:00

We hear about AI everywhere. Chatbots, algorithms, self-driving cars – they’re changing the way we work, learn, and communicate. It’s impressive, sometimes a little intimidating, and often makes us wonder: if machines can think, what’s left for us?

But here’s the thing – artificial intelligence can process data, predict patterns, and solve problems. Actual intelligence? That’s deeper. It’s curiosity, creativity, empathy, and the ability to connect the dots in ways no algorithm can.

The Limits of Machines

AI can crunch numbers, recognize faces, and even write essays. But it doesn’t feel. It doesn’t care about context the way we do. It doesn’t understand a joke, a story, or why a moment matters. Actual intelligence is messy, human, and unpredictable – but it’s also what makes innovation, leadership, and culture possible. Machines can assist, but they can’t replace insight, judgment, or intuition.

The future isn’t about choosing AI over us – it’s about how we use it. When artificial intelligence augments actual intelligence, we unlock new potential. We work smarter, not just harder. We ask better questions, notice patterns we might miss, and focus on the ideas that truly matter.

Curiosity Over Automation

Our greatest advantage is our minds. Let’s stay curious, keep asking questions, and remember what makes us human. AI is powerful; actual intelligence, fueled by creativity, empathy, and awareness, is what shapes our world.

AI and AI are here to stay. The machines will get smarter and more intuitive. They are not fads and the bottle was crushed years ago. Use AI and AI as tools and allow your own input and thoughts to have a voice as well.

We live with machines; but life is built on us. ____________________________________________________________

Scrolling Through Life And Missing It

2026-01-06T11:00:00.008-05:00

We live on our devices. Clips, viral videos, news alerts - they’re everywhere, and they grab our attention like magnets. Did we see that thing? Did we hear about that guy?

Sometimes it feels like we’re keeping up with the world, but are we keeping up with ourselves? Hours slip by while we react, scroll, and double-tap, and the life happening right in front of us quietly passes by.

Missing Moments That Matter

Life isn’t a feed. The laughter around the table, the quiet moments at sunrise, the small gestures that mean the most - they aren’t trending, and they aren’t going viral. When we’re glued to our screens, we risk missing the very moments that make life rich.

Relationships weaken, opportunities pass, and our own story gets lost among everyone else’s highlights. That doesn’t mean we ditch tech entirely. Devices are tools, not life itself. The trick is balance. Let’s take a walk, have a conversation, or just pause to notice what’s happening around us. Being present, opens doors: we see people, ideas, and moments we would have scrolled past.

Finding Life Between the Notifications

Ask questions, notice details, and truly listen. Life is happening, whether we’re looking at it or not. When we reconnect with our own world, the digital one becomes less distracting and more of a choice rather than a habit. We live on our devices - but life is happening for us, right now.

Let’s not miss it. ____

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Work + Love + Other Life Stuff

2025-12-21T00:00:00.015-05:00

It’s often said we should find something we’re passionate about and do it. We'll cool let's do that! Now why are we unhappy again? Oh yeah, because we often have absolutely no idea what are truly passionate about and worse how to even achieve it.

In his book, “Love + Work”, author, speaker, and consultant Marcus Buckingham examines how our lives and our careers are forever intertwined. He writes finding something we love doesn't mean it's going to be nirvana all the time but rather we will find love within it and the challenges will be easier to overcome. Have you ever lost track of time doing something? Yeah that.

Buckingham also reminds us no one will ever be exactly the same as each of us. No one who has ever existed or will ever exist will be exactly like you. Celebrate that.

Perfection is impossible.

We live in woke times. Some have deemed themselves the grand jury of all opinion. Here's the deal, I won't judge you, you don't judge me, and we'll be good. You do stuff you will love most of the time and I'll do that same. I may love auto racing but I won't insult you if you have a passion for flower arranging. It's not my call!

No one has any right to tell you what you think or feel, nor does anyone have the right to tell you what or who you love. Life is not a zero-sum game to be won. As its own name defines, it is living breathing inaccurate flawed experience. Yet for some reason we measure ourselves against perfection.

This is your life. Tell her how you feel. Look for another line of work. Stop letting others decide for you. Love who you want, do what you want, don't let others tell you what's best for you. I'm not proclaiming I don't have that doubtful voice in my head most of the time which I wish would shut up, but let's see if we can shift our thinking together.

That might be a good plan. ____________________________________________________________

Ghost and the Machine

2025-12-05T14:53:00.007-05:00

You’ve probably noticed it. It’s likely been happening since the dawn of time, but it feels like it’s ramped up in recent years. Many of us hoped the world would become kinder and gentler after Covid - but in many ways, the opposite has happened.

Everyone’s “busy.” Everyone has too many priorities, too many choices. It’s become a comfortable excuse when we simply don’t want to do something.

My mom had a vivid phrase for when we went back on our word, she’d threaten to tan our hides. If you said you’d take the job and show up on time, you did exactly that.

If you or anyone you know works in fast service, you’ve probably heard the stories - people not showing up for shifts. When I was a kid, that was unthinkable. You did what you said you were going to do.

Sorry, I’m Busy

Now to the big one: ghosting. You start a promising conversation with a potential client, things seem to go well - and then they vanish. No replies, no calls, no explanation. No one is that busy after the third or fourth follow-up. Maybe they hope you’ll give up - and often, that’s exactly what happens. But here’s the thing: it’s not about being busy; it’s about being respectful.

Difficult conversations are difficult. But if you’re too afraid to say no, don’t say yes or maybe in the first place. The old saying holds true - a fast no is far better than a slow maybe… and miles ahead of an unprofessional ghosting.

Leave a message after the beep.

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What's For Dinner?

2025-11-18T15:04:00.013-05:00

We've heard the old saying ‘starve a fever, feed a cold’. As leaders, what would happen if we applied that to our lives by feeding our passions and not giving any table scraps to our fears? Yes, easier said than done but worth a shot.

Some organizations, for all their efforts, become a dysfunctional environment. This is where I can help. Some don't want to be helped and it's best we leave them to their misery. Perhaps there is an underlying issue that needs to be put on a diet.

Often, much of what we may fear isn’t the big scary monster but simply something we haven’t tried or an instance where we need help from others or a bit more experience. We may have fear while others navigate it with ease and can help us. There will be times the roles are reversed but we need to starve our fears together.

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Moola Don't Move Ya

2025-11-04T14:54:00.011-05:00

How often do we talk about motivation in business and relate it to a monetary reward? Some say all you have to do is create an award system of new titles and higher compensation and everyone's happy.

Dan Pink has been studying human motivation for years; he's written books on it; and speaks all over the world about it. He explains in his 2009 Global TEDTalk about the science of motivation. Lose the carrots, lose the sticks, and learn more about people.

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Your Important is Important

2025-10-17T14:34:00.000-04:00

I was in a situation last week where three of us were out for lunch. One buddy is going through a horrific divorce and the other friend doesn't know him all that well. Cue the awkward when friend number two decides to drop into friend number one's situation (which has been going on for two years) and lob a bunch of advice. Suffice it to say, the lunch ended abruptly.

Hey, intentionally or unintentionally, we all do it and often we don't mean it. We want to help, offer some advice, and without proper context, purpose solutions. The most difficult challenge in the human condition is our emotional health.

What makes you doubtful might not register on my radar. Which gets us back to the compassion of others. So, let's try it this week. Ask someone how they are doing and wait for the answer.

You might help someone more than you know. __________________________________________________________________

Shame is No Friend of Mine

2025-10-03T14:18:00.001-04:00

If you got a call from a friend or loved one who asked you to help them as they had just broken their arm, what would you do? You would obviously drop what you were doing, drive to their location, and take them to the hospital.

Here's another scenario. What would you do if that same friend or loved one called you to say they were having some emotional issues? Dr. Sangu Delle shares his story about a dear friend who needed his help.

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Change is Gonna Come ...For You

2025-09-17T14:02:00.007-04:00

Change is a concept that seems to drive us, win elections, looks great on a coffee mug, and creates stress.

We hear the word and feel two immediate and visceral responses: things will improve for us and everyone will need to change but us. Things need to change; I'm fine!

We love the idea of it; the cozy non-committal nature of talking about it. It's as if the world was covered in magic dust and all is well. "They need to change." "We need to bring about change." "Change is gonna come." It all sounds so good.

Someday does not appear on the calendar

To most, change is about control and standing still while others make the shift. You may be one who thrives on change but be careful when you want to instill it on others. They too may like the theory but will define it to fit their own convenience.

Who among us admits to be part of the problem? We want things to change but often under our rules and our guidelines. And whenever you include anything or anyone outside of your own mind, the grip must be loosened or collaboration is a challenge.

Actual change verses talking about change is the key.

Life's Simple Lesson

2025-09-05T16:22:00.005-04:00

Our minds are filled with a myriad emotions, thoughts, and distractions. AI is here to save the day, end the earth, change humans, we don't know. There are millions who won't eat today. Senseless bullies causing famine and death. And we don't even know what to say, think, do, that won't offend someone.

I am fortunate to be in the top 1% living in a top 1% country - an awesome place called Canada. Some days I want to help everyone; others I want to hide under the covers. Did our ancestors feel this way during world wars? Has technology changed to protect the narrative? Or are we dealing with first world problems?

Some of the best advice I've ever gotten is to just do something that will help someone. You aren't solving word hunger; but you can help one person. Lend a hand in some way to someone may be the message we need to hear most.

It's worth a try.

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Want Next What

2025-08-18T16:20:00.000-04:00

You've said it; you’ve heard it; you’ve been asked it - what do you want? It’s a huge question and most of us have a list. It’s too much to ask. I want to be financially stable. I want a puppy. I want to have millions. I want to retire. I want to live in a lakefront mansion and sip iced tea all day.

We all dream of winning the lottery. We all let our minds wander to places where we perceive our problems will vanish and life will be endless bliss. It's like the old story of the nine year old boy who is once asked; "So Sam, what do you want to be when you grow up?" and Sam quickly replies; "I wanna be rich!"

Tougher Done Than Said

It took me years to grasp the concept of the fear of success. It sounded counterintuitive. The fear of failure, to me, is easy to understand. You don't want to fall on your face or run out of money or have to give up things you have your life. The embarrassment of failing is terrible. But, what about our fear of what we will do if what we try actually works? How will you handle the responsibility of that dream coming true?

The marketing genius Seth Godin once challenged that it's easier to fail small. Complaining about the fact we never amount to anything or we're not meant to win or no one ever gives us a break, is way easier than the unwavering persistence required to achieve something we want.

It's Way Too Big

In my opinion, it's easy to say you want a Bugatti Veyron because odds are pretty good it will never happen. It's much more difficult to identify the small shifts we need to make every day to get to the bigger dreams we possess. My business partner and I have been working on a project for close to a year. There are days we wonder if we are out of our minds. But each day, you push a bit more, ask a little bit more, and keep at it. Giving up now will only make us forever wonder what if we had kept going.

You have dreams. You have things you want to accomplish. You have stuff that may feel a little out of reach. But I'm willing to bet if you suspend those for just today and think about what you could do right now to get what you need right now or your next want, over time, those bigger things will come clearer into focus.

Let's try that and see what happens.

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Dinner by Committee

2025-08-06T16:14:00.004-04:00

If you have worked a day in your life, it is fairly safe to say you have worked alongside others. In some cases, those experiences have been enjoyable while others have not. You may have had to endure an arrogant selfish boss while other situations have been filled with giving collaborative coworkers.

We seem to enjoy looking at things “on paper” but they get all wobbly when we add the human element and often it’s because we are unclear about the mandate. Often there is a struggle among conflicting agendas or someone comes in and plays the “I’m the boss” card. None of these scenarios are effective, productive, or long lasting business success models. However, sadly they are far too common.

But what happens when you ask a group of people to build a structure out of spaghetti, string, and a bag of marshmallows?

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P is for People

2025-07-21T16:12:00.000-04:00

Anyone in marketing can recite the four P's which are product, price, placement, and promotion. But how do the four P's apply to company culture and leadership?

Practice

Have you ever been to a sporting event or seen a live play or concert? Have you watched a great movie? Do you have any experience meeting someone else who is successful in business? Do you find motivation from people who show talent and prowess in a particular discipline? In each case, someone spent years honing their skills to make it appear effortless. Yet we are quick to criticize from the comfort of our 20oz beer mug in the 300 level. Now think about your skill set and what you can bring to any situation. Did you learn and execute all you know immediately?

Patience

If you enjoy writing, reading a good book may give you more determination to work on your own novel. You may know someone who went back to school and emerged with a whole new career path. Seeing others succeed may give you reason to study their process to improve your business.

Persistence

It requires working nights and weekends, writing ideas on scraps of paper you later find in the laundry, networking well, reading incessantly while life blends with work. No successful person in history has gotten it right the first time. And no one does it alone.

Play

There are many ways to be successful. What's important is to be organized and have a strategic plan. It is equally essential not to settle for good enough - that's what the other guys do. It's critical not to rest on the past or think we have all the answers, that's where danger resides. And it's okay to get a little messy once in a while, take some chances.

Let's add a fifth – Purpose. __________________________________________________________________

More Useless Facts

2025-07-07T16:03:00.003-04:00

It's been a while, so let's do another list of useless facts that will not get you the job, impress potential partners, or get you that awesome gig at the AI development firm.

But they are fun nonetheless;

Earth's rotation is changing speed. It's actually slowing, and this means that, on average, the length of a day increases by around 1.8 seconds per century. C'mon, I don't have all second!

Allodoxaphobia is the fear of other people's opinions. It's a rare social phobia characterized by an irrational and overwhelming fear of what other people think. So keep your opinion to yourself.

M&Ms are named after the businessmen who created them. Forrest Mars and Bruce Murrie. Just a few handfuls for me, thanks.

The world's longest walking distance is 14,000 miles. You can walk from Magadan in Russia to Cape Town in South Africa. It requires no flying or sailing—just bridges and open roads. Bring comfy shoes.

A jiffy is an actual unit of time. It's 1/100th of a second. And a peanut butter brand.

The shortest commercial flight in the world takes place in Scotland. Regional airline Loganair flies between the islands Westray and Papa Westray. The journey is just 1.7 miles and takes 90 seconds. Baggage claim is about 90 minutes.

There are more than 1,000 types of bananas growing in the world. These can then be divided into 50 categories. Gonna need a bigger freezer.

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Flight Fear Fight

2025-06-25T15:46:00.007-04:00

In my experience, if we are currently faced with something we think we can’t accomplish, we can get clear on what we want, what drives us, and what makes us happy. Then we ask those around us for help, or we freeze in fear and nothing gets done.

The word selfish was always a tough one for me. It conjured up images of self-centered people who would take for themselves at the expense of others. These were loud arrogant people who would think nothing of walking over someone for their own gain. But the word selfish also means being self-aware and self-seeking.

Let's Dig Deeper

To seek more of one’s self is to get to the core and underlying meaning of our existence. And while we get clearer on who we are and what we want, the challenge is not in saying yes but rather in saying no to things that weaken our purpose.

I've discovered it can be helpful to find a quiet place to focus on what is important. Finding that quite place in this busy lizard brain is my challenge. Allowing gratitude for those who help takes practice. There are people in our lives right now who want to help.

We just need to pay attention and accept their help.
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Stress and a Couch

2025-06-09T15:40:00.003-04:00

Merriam-Webster defines stress as to cause or experience physical or emotional tension. It's not an object we can put in our hand or pour into a glass. It's felt on an emotional level, but it can be just as real as a punch in the face. A lot of people are talking and writing about stress these days. A global pandemic will do that.

You have family and career and health and finances and deadlines and all the other items on your list called your life. The layers seep into each other and affect the results of everything. If you're stressed about the health of a loved one, your work is probably going to take a second seat. If you have financial issues, your family may suffer.

Real or Imagined?

You have a deadline for today. A client is waiting and it absolutely has to be delivered. That's stress. Add to that, your boss has called you four times to remind you of the deadline and adds revisions each time. That's added stress. Your partner calls and your child is sick. Then the client calls and wants to ditch the whole idea and start over. That's about when you're ready to throw your laptop.

I have mentioned this several hundred times on this site, but if I talk about self-inflicted, self-doubt, or self-stress, I know of it only too well. That's where we get into the weeds, as my business partner would say. The client has changed the scope, the kid has the sniffles, and your boss has added useless additions to the deck that is now scrapped.

Reversed Delegation

A former boss walked into my office one morning just to say hi and see how was I doing. He could tell I was stressed. He asked me what the issues were and if he could help. I admitted I simply had too much on my plate and I didn't want to miss a deadline.

I usually have a written to-do list next to my laptop and he asked to see it. He grabbed a pen and started putting a line through a lot of the items and handed it back. But I needed to know how he could just arbitrarily take stuff on my list.

Their List

He said he had been in most of the meetings where the items were raised, but for some reason I had added them to my to-do list. He told me to send them back to the people who came up with them, ask them to flush them out, and bring them back to me with more ideas of how to accomplish them. He said most of the items will disappear. He told me I was suffering from a serious ailment – reverse delegation.

The lesson for me was that real deadlines can cause stress but self-created ones that shouldn't be on our list only complicate our lives. Stress is part of life's recipe but we don't need to add any unnecessary ingredients. We can discuss not making everything on our to-do list a top priority in another post.

Stress is part of life. Adding more than necessary isn't required.

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Return Policy

2025-05-21T14:07:00.002-04:00

It's been widely reported that the difference between us and the rest of the animal kingdom is apposable thumbs and the ability to reason. And wouldn't it be so much easier if that was the only difference?

We human types are complicated creatures and I suspect our reasoning minds add way more complication than is required to live a successful and contented life. We want more money to buy more things; we want to climb company ladders to achieve bigger titles; we want a nicer house than Bob across the street; the list is endless and most of it is useless to finding happiness or contentment.

More More More

When we get our first apartment, it's usually filled with hand-me-downs from our parents or family. I think I was well into my 20's before I purchased my very own set of new cutlery (silverware) which went nicely with my very own set of new dishes and cups.

Fast forward many years and many moves and many sets of dinnerware, and now I have stuff I actually don't even remember buying and why is that? Are we seeking something we can never catch? Is last year's car not good enough for us? Do we really need that food processor that will grate cheese in seconds?

Less is More

I think one of the sources of our unhappiness is that we have no clue what we want or what we'll do when we find it. I recently had to return some items I bought online because they were the wrong size. As I was dropping them off at the courier place, I realized two things – I didn't need the items and have no intention of re-ordering different sizes. What is that? Boredom? I'm not sure.

I guess we can make the case for just about any decision. That's why you can buy a McLaren supercar in hot pink. Our reasoning minds aren't always sound in their decisions. So while we search for something we'll never find, perhaps figuring out what we need and dumping the rest is a good first start?

Perhaps my parents' old couch was all I needed?

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Hope So

2025-05-06T14:03:00.004-04:00

It’s been often said that hope is not a strategy but I wonder if we should automatically throw it out. Hope pushes us forward; it keeps our minds active toward potential results and solutions. As we get to the end of our lives, regret can be one of the worst emotions we can feel, so as long as there is hope, we can carry on.

This is not to suggest we can survive simply on hope because without effort and action, it will be an empty exercise. However, if we remain hopeful, we will keep trying to find solutions, relationships, business concepts, and career choices.

In Other Words

Synonyms for hope include; confidence, courage, anticipation, faith, and optimism.

If we replace any of those words when we feel we are looking at what we want, perhaps it can change our perspective. And if evidence becomes overwhelming that hope for a certain outcome isn’t going to go our way, we should find strength to keep hope in our minds and hearts for the next time around.

Time gives us experience and hope gives us life to our dreams, plans, ideas, and relationships. Life can be hard, business can be challenging, and leadership can be a struggle. If we keep our hope at the forefront, we can take our experiences and passions forward when circumstances don’t go our way.

Let's stay hopeful.
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Stay Out of the Shallow End

2025-04-24T13:58:00.002-04:00

Some of our most memorable experiences are unplanned. Like the time I ran into a buddy from college with whom I hadn't seen in probably fifteen years. He had gotten married, had a daughter and twin boys. His business was doing well and he had just been awarded a customer contract that was pretty much going to set him up financially for the rest of his kids' lives.

We had coffee and caught up. He had done all these things since our silly days of college but deep down he hadn't changed a bit. I was suddenly taking stock on how I didn't have millions and he suddenly said; "So, what was it like to meet all those rock stars years ago?" I didn't have a lifetime of money in the bank or three awesome kids.

Look at you!

He went on to tell me about my accomplishments. My college friend wasn't comparing; he was sharing. He had humility toward his success and was more interested in mine. While I was comparing bank accounts like a shallow idiot.

We all have a story to tell. You may not think you have much to share at a college reunion, but you have done some things others may remark on. It doesn't matter if you haven't been on the radio or built a multi-million dollar company.

Zero-sum

There will always be people richer than us, slimmer than us, younger than us, and more "successful" than us. And there will be plenty who feel that way about us. My friend said it was no contest if he ever had to choose between his business and his family. No success was worth losing them.

If we can stop comparing for a moment and cherish what we have and have done, perhaps we won't focus on scarcity but rather abundance. It was great to see my old pal again and he taught me a lot that day.

A look oudside can give us better perspective inside

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Two Wheels and a Trunk

2025-04-11T16:00:00.001-04:00

I was thinking about a situation that happened a couple of years ago that sucked. Life moved on but I still think about it. I've asked numerous people if they have events they relive in their heads over and over again. The answer is almost always yes because most of us do. But why is that?

I'm not suggesting we don't relive happy memories, but the challenges seem to cut deeper for some reason. Is it perhaps because we are still learning a lesson? I know this, the more we try and not think about those events, the more we think about them. If I was to ask you to not think about an orange elephant riding a motorcycle – good luck getting that image out of your head!

Beware of the Lizard Brain

I'd consider myself a fairly smart dude, so why can't I just tell myself to stop letting something that has already happened, which I cannot change, continue to bug me? It has to do with the part of the limbic system in our brains that is in charge of fight, flight, feed, fear, or freeze. It is our survival mechanism which decides what we do next if we are experiencing stress. It's why we can't seem to get started on the project even though we know the deadline looms.

If we have a situation, current or past, real or imagined, it will react immediately. If we are experiencing or have experienced pain, it will focus solely on that moment. When I think of that event, it's as if I am reliving it over and over again.

Negative vs Positive

Perhaps this is more prevalent in Western culture, but we seem to do it more often when remembering negative situations over joyous ones. Do we think we don't deserve joy and need to pay for pain? I'm obviously not a psychologist but I think there's something to that. Our frontal lobe is in charge of reasoning, motor skills, higher level cognition, and expressive language. So our complicated brain starts to fight with itself.

I've started an exercise and like most when you begin, I'm terrible at it, but I'm trying to think of five positive things in my life or events that have happened whenever a negative thought or memory crosses my mind. When I can do it successfully, it actually works. So perhaps you can try it if you can't seem to get past a negative event in your past.

I wonder how the elephant balances on that motorcycle?

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