One Perspective One Blog

Need Therapy? Try to get a new job.

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Tue, 01 Nov 2011 00:45:00 +0000

I have decided that interviewing is really therapy.

I have never had a therapy session so I could be a little off in my comparison but in my job search experience over the last few years, it has felt more like therapy. If you make it pass the gated phone interview and are invited to a in-person interview and this is where the magic happens. Your interviewer will take you back to where your career started and bring you up to the present time. As you begin to describe your responsibilities, you take a trip down memory lane but something unexpected always seems to happen.

As the interview progresses, a question will be asked that requires some deep thought. You begin to run through your experiences in your head and then start to answer the question and then it happens! You have an Oprah Ah-Ha moment. You realize that your whole life changed based on one occurrence in your childhood or one interaction with a co-worker. Or you realize that the reason you act the way you do is because your first boss or a school mate treated you a certain way. Or you realize that your parents raised you to think a certain way and that is why you grew up to be good or bad at something. Each interview opportunity causes a person to have a different story come to life for them.

One moment you are talking out loud about something related to the job and all the sudden you have a moment of clarity about something in your life. It is usually something so simple that you can't believe this is the first time you have ever made the connection. When the interview is over you are thankful for the opportunity to be considered for a job but that isn't the only thing you got out of it. You are secretly grateful because you just had a break-through moment in your life that would not have surfaced any other way.

So the lesson here... the next time you feel like something isn't right in your life maybe it is time to start looking for a new job. You will get the answers you need during one of your interviews. It is a lot cheaper than therapy. When the interview process is over they could end up paying you or you may never have to see them again. Either way, you will feel a little more complete. It is a win-win.

RSVP Yes means you are coming, right?

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Mon, 15 Aug 2011 00:44:00 +0000

I discovered a pet-peeve. I usually don't sit around thinking about what kind of things bother me but when something happens that catches your attention in a bad way, it can raise that issue to a whole new level of awareness. It causes you to clearly define the offensive behavior for future reference.

This newly discovered pet-peeve is something that everyone does usually without any harm or bad intention. We do it to try and not hurt or disappoint people but it always runs the risk of doing just the opposite. So what act could be so damaging? Not saying no.

How many times do you get invited to go somewhere, do something, or participate in an activity that you really don't want to do? How many times do you come up with some excuse about why you can't go? All the time, right? We do it so we don't hurt people's feelings or disappoint anyone. Here are some classic scenes from the movie, Yes Man starring Jim Carey to help illustrate this: http://youtu.be/dk15ya0nzAk?hd=1 and http://youtu.be/XvKz7efhE2c?hd=1

Sometimes people say yes and then don't show up. Sometimes people will say yes and then, at the last minute, have a conflict conveniently pop-up. Sometimes people show up but they can't stay long. It seems like we would rather feel guilty about lying than mildly disappoint someone. Where is the good in that? Doesn't this fall under the two wrongs don't make a right category? Why is it that we can't just say no?

What makes this phenomena the worst is when you are on the other side of the invitation. When you invite people to do things and you know they are lying to you in order not to participate. It feels gross and it cheapens your relationship. For acquaintances, this behavior isn't welcome but it seems to be more easily forgivable. Where it really crosses the line and this action becomes unacceptable and very harmful is when it happens between close personal friends. When it is someone you have known for a long time and trusted, and they tell you a lie to get out of something, it really hurts. What does it say about your friendship when you can't be honest with each other? What else are they not being honest about with you? Can you trust them moving forward? What ends up as an attempt to not hurt someone's feelings ends up really hurting the friendship. It is a major withdrawal from your friendship bank account and it is very difficult and time consuming to try and replenish the situation.

Is it worth it? Just two little letters can prevent this pain, n-o. Saying no means you don't have to lie. Saying no means... you don't have to do anything you don't want to do and be stressed about it. Saying no means... you don't have to feel guilty about making up an excuse. Saying no means... you might disappoint someone in the short term but you actually enhance your relationships with people because you were being honest with them.

Be real. Be honest. Just say no... or yes, but follow through. You will be surprised what happens. The more genuine you are with people the better your relationships will be and that is what life is all about in the end.

The Worst Game Ever Invented

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Mon, 08 Aug 2011 00:59:00 +0000

You always hear people saying they are playing a "waiting game." Everyone plays this game at some point in their life. Based on my own experience, I believe it is the worst game ever invented.

Most likely if you are waiting on something and it feels like time is standing still, it is a situation that you want to have resolved as soon as possible. It could be exciting news or news that could possibly change the direction of your life. The longer time goes by and you don't know the news, the longer you live in a state of complete distraction.

Other than not being able to move forward, the worst part of waiting is the situation is totally out of your control. If you are waiting and feeling tortured about it then someone else probably holds the answer to your situation. You can't call and bug them, sending nagging emails, or try to rush things along without the risk of sounding desperate, being annoying, or possibly influencing the outcome to not be in your favor depending on the situation. So you have to wait.

Here are some tips on making the wait more tolerable:
1. Find something else to do during the wait. This will help time go faster and keep you productive. It is amazing how many chores you can accomplish or how satisfying it can be to check off some of those home projects. Find something that will tie up your thoughts or go get lost in a movie or conversation with friends.

2. Take a moment to acknowledge that you never had control of this situation in the first place. God has a plan for you and His will is better than anything you can come up with or desire. Even if you get the answer you have been waiting for and it isn't what you had hoped you can rest easy because all things work together for good for those who believe. So no matter what, everything will be just fine. Just believe, really believe, and you will be able to relax.

3. Take what ever step you can take. What is the next step if you get your answer? Can you research anything? Can you get ready? Can you plan the next step without implementing anything? Maybe take a moment to write things down. Drawing a decision tree, make a plan A or Plan B diagram, create a list, and just let your mind and thoughts progress.

Waiting can be a great training tool for developing patience. God could be working things around during your wait time to make the answer better for you. Waiting is the worst game ever invented but you don't have a choice in whether you experience it so you have to try and make the best out of the situation. You will wait for something important at some point so choose to make the situation as good as it can get. So what are you waiting for?

3 Signs You Are an Instant Gratification Addict

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Fri, 24 Jun 2011 01:29:00 +0000

You can get almost anything at anytime on the Internet. With invention of the Smart Phone and tablet things are now available anywhere you go. The more readily the information and services are the more we seem to want and the less tolerant we are to wait for anything.

The question is, do we need things immediately or do we just want it because we can have it? Have we become greedy for information and pleasure? Everyone wants to experience pleasure in their life. Pleasure feels great but it doesn't last very long. That is why we keep seeking it and often push the limits of normal behavior to try and squeeze every last bit of pleasure out of everything. They say good things come to those who wait... so why can't we wait? Are we addicted to instant gratification? Here are 3 signs:

1. Lack of Self Control
Do you have a hard time stopping certain behaviors like drinking, eating, speeding, spending, or talking about yourself? This could be a sign that you want to feel as good as can, as soon as possible, and as much as possible no matter the consequences.

2. Gossip
Do you find yourself participating frequently in conversations about other people? Do you make it a point to share any details you know about certain people at work or in your family? This could be a sign that you need to feel good by making other people look or sound bad. You may feel more superior when you talk about the questionable behavior of other people.

3. Desires are too Strong
Do you have to have the latest technology gadget, fashions, celebrity news, or information? Do you often find a way to justify the purchase of things that you really don't need? Do you have to know everything about what is happening in the news or inside of a company? You may be passionate about something but love it so much that your desire has reached an unhealthy or obsessive level. Knowing everything you can about one subject can make you feel good.

If you have some of these signs and experience them on a daily basis you may be addicted to Instant Gratification. While some of this behavior could be harmless, some of it could be causing you to act in ways that others perceive as questionable.

Here are some things to consider to help curb the need for instant gratification:

1. Acknowledge there is a problem. Admit it and begin recognize what it looks like.

2. Set boundaries so that you are not tempted. Don't go to bars. Don't eat dessert. Don't buy anything for 30 days, Turn off your phone at meals and meetings.

3. Set limits of time, portions, spending, etc. only allow a specific amount of time to spend on your passion or behavior, i.e. once a week, once a day for 30 minutes, etc.

4. Get help. Find an accountability partner or speak to a counselor.

5. Look at the root of your behavior. Is there something else missing or not right in your life that this behavior is covering up that needs to be addressed? Find it and address it.

6. Think bigger. Instant is small but waiting for something better is bigger thinking and could be more of an investment in your future.

7. Pray for guidance. God is big and can help you see how blessed you are and how to be content with what you have.

8. Spend time on more important things that add value to other people or to your future such as: Volunteer, take a class, read a book, exercise, teach, spend time with kids or seniors.

9. Go cold turkey! For example, cancel your text plan, give up sweets, be silent for hours, return the gadget to the store. Take drastic action to jump start your new line of thinking.

10. Make sure the person you are talking about is in front of you or always assume that what you are saying will be heard or scene by the person.

Start seeking joy rather than pleasure. Joy is God given, longer lasting, and usually it is a better experience than anything you can imagine on your own. Joy is harder to find but usually well worth the wait. Let go of the need for instant gratification and embrace the process of things happening at their own pace.

Big Adventure - London, Day 9

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Sat, 28 May 2011 03:10:00 +0000

Sunday, May 8, 2011

5:30am came very quick. Michele checked her bill and checked out and our taxi was waiting on schedule. We were both half asleep but were able to take in a few more sites on our way to the airport. It was the only day that it rained our whole stay. The hotel arranged the taxi so we were charged a flat fee of 50 pounds. It ended up being cheaper and quicker than the train when we split it.

When we got to the airport there was plenty of time so we checked in and went through customs. Once we were on the terminal side we located the Delta VIP area and ate some breakfast. Our first class seats were amazing. We each had our own seat one behind the other. The seats reclined flat, had their own TV monitor with a remote control, and a built in massage feature. They offered champagne, orange juice, and mimosas as soon as we sat down. Once we got in the air they just kept serving us food. Delta had US Airways beat hands down! I watched about 3 movies, read a little of my book, took a short nap, and began writing this journal about my trip. The flight was so smooth and went a lot faster than I thought it would.

We arrived in Miami around 3pm (8pm body time) and had to go through customs again. We claimed our luggage and rechecked it. One of the benefits of first class is that you get priority handling on your luggage. I was feeling pretty good once we got to Miami but by the time we left I was slowing down. It had been a long day.

We had a quick flight from Miami and landed in Orlando around 6pm(11pm body time). Dad picked me up in his truck and I told him all about my trip. He had been texting me all day letting me know he was tracking my flight, where my baggage claim was, and whether or not my flight was on time. He dropped me off and I felt so relieved to be home but so mixed up on time. I stayed up late to try and make sure I slept in the next day. Thank goodness I took Monday off.

I really had a good time. London was such a great place to visit. The culture there was comfortable and it felt like such an interesting place. Belgium was so pretty but it wasn’t as contemporary in style. It was a nice place to visit but I don’t want to live there. I think I could live in London for a short while but there were certainly some key things missing there that the American way just seems so much better. The flight to and from Europe wasn’t so bad although first class made a huge difference. It is worth the upgrade for that long of a flight so I am going to start saving for next time.

I learned a lot about myself on this trip. I learned that I have a good sense of direction and can probably go anywhere I wanted to with enough research and the right travel buddy. I also learned that I like to travel and with all the excitement happening around you it is possible to live through major time change relying on pure adrenaline. Hope you enjoyed the blog!

Until the next adventure...

Big Adventure - London, Day 8

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Fri, 27 May 2011 02:39:00 +0000

Saturday, May 7, 2011

We got up early to execute our plans and again grabbed breakfast at a nearby café. This time I had a somewhat traditional English breakfast of eggs and ham. When we got to the bus stop we learned it didn’t get to our stop until 10:30am. Our plan was in jeopardy... so we walked to the next bus stop at Buckingham Palace and it was the same situation. We hadn’t anticipated this wrinkle and we knew we just had to keep moving. We continued to walk until we got to the Kensington area and were finally able to get our bus. We had walked about three quarters of the way there and were already tired. Michele had accidentally spilled her hot chocolate on her shirt so the short bus ride was needed to rest and regroup. We got off and went to the TK Maxx store where we looked around and Michele found a suitcase for the trip home. We still had time to follow our plan as long as the Palace tour went quick. So we walked to the Palace with a giant empty suitcase. Luckily, they let us check it at the front while we walked around.

Michele with her new suitcase

Me not taking a photo inside K.P.

Kensington Palace sat on the edge of Hyde Park and was really beautiful from the outside. It was smaller and older looking and felt like it was in the country. They were refurbishing the landscaping in the front but it still looked like such a quaint place. When we bought our ticket the lady made a major point that the tour wasn’t a memorial to Princess Diana. I don’t think we were expecting it to be but we were shocked at what we found anyway. It reminded me of a whimsical children’s museum. Each room was empty of furniture but had some type of misunderstood carnival haunted mansion set up in it. The place was musty and dark and the room setups were ridiculous and made no sense. It really felt like they had messed up a very historical building with an crazy storyline that was so out there it was inappropriate. It felt like it was disrespectful of any royal family member that had lived there. It was a major disappointment so we didn’t stay long. By the time we exited it was already 11am.

Our bus ticket was expiring and we needed to make up some time so we decided to take a taxi to Westminster Abby. When we got there a huge line of people were waiting to get in. We had wanted to drop the suitcase at the hotel but we didn’t want to miss getting in to the Abby so we just went directly there. Michele and I had been in line for about 40 minutes and were about 40 people from the entrance when an older man who worked at the Abby approached us. He told Michele that she couldn’t enter with the bag because it was too big. Michele was really upset and I felt horrible about it. She got out of the line and sat down with her bag. I got out of line to join her but she insisted that I get back in line and go in without her. I felt awful! She was so angry and so disappointed. I wanted to stay with her and be supportive but I also wanted to go the Abby. I was in London, the royal wedding happened a week ago here, and I didn’t know if I would ever get a chance to see it again. So I went in by myself feeling guilty but excited.

Me not taking photo inside W.A.

The place was so beautiful on the outside and I had seen so much of it on TV just a week ago. As the line entered the building I noticed there were several stone tributes to people on the walls. They were really big with people’s names and stories on them and they seemed to be placed kind of randomly next to each other. I paid for my ticket and proceeded inside. The stain glass windows were gorgeous and the place had ceilings that were so tall. I desperately wanted to take some pictures but there were signs indicating it wasn’t allowed and workers wandering around telling people to turn off their cameras. I was able to take some awkward shots but nothing of significance. As I walked around I couldn’t help but notice that the place was a crypt. There were so many stone boxes full of dead people. Even on the floors there were stone on top of places where people had been buried. It was like the biggest indoor cemetery I had ever seen.

I walked to the area where the main alter was. I couldn’t believe I was standing in the same place where the Queen and the entire royal family was just the week before. The alter area looked so much smaller than it did on TV. It was so ornate with wood and gold. On TV you just didn't get to see the detailed gold. Behind the main alter area was there was an area surrounded by crypts from dead Kings. This is where the couple went to sign their papers. There was a big chapel behind that area with stained glass windows all around it. To the side of the main alter was a walkway and courtyard. The floors and walls were covered with more monuments of dead people. One segment of the walkway had a small gift area and coffee shop. It seemed really out of place. I walked back into the Abby where the main aisle was located.

The main alter area looked really worn and the aisle that Princess Catherine had walked down just a week ago was so narrow. The section closest to the alter area was for the choir. I always thought it was weird that the choir faced each other in rows of three or four and that they were located in the middle of everything. Must have been an old cathedral thing. The main aisle was divided in half with a little room with a gate. The gate was trimmed in ornate figures and shapes including a lot of gold trim. During the wedding the orchestra played on top of the room. I walked out of the back of the Abby where the Prince and Princess had walked out to board their horse carriage. I passed by the Tomb of the unknown soldier and the Coronation Chair. They were in the process of preserving the chair that had been used to coronate so many kings and queens. As I walked out of the building I took a ton of pictures of all the details. It was truly an amazing structure but again it didn’t feel spiritual at all. It was a cemetery for one thing but just like the cathedral in Gent it was just too ornate. It felt like the emphasis was out of whack.

I walked around to the front of the building to find Michele. I tried to reassure her that it wasn’t that big of a deal. I told her it was full of dead people and played down how beautiful it was to try and help her feel better about the situation. She had calmed down and said that she wanted to go back to the hotel. We were both out of cash so we tried to flag down a taxi that took credit cards. We found one at a stop light and hopped in. Luckily the hotel was just a few blocks away.

We returned to our favorite hang out—the hotel lounge, to grab some lunch. Michele had more fish and chips and I had a greasy ham and cheese sandwich. We talked a lot and she had a couple of beers to try and relax. We both grabbed some more money to exchange to prepare for our taxi ride to the airport early the next morning. Feeling rested and refreshed we decided to press on.

We walked to the London Eye taking kind of the long way around so we could get some more sight seeing in. We cross the Jubilee Bridge and walked right into a bunch of street performers. They were really lame. There was a street dancer getting a pretty good sized crowd but everyone else was really bad. There were two people dressed as Mickey and Donald. There was a man dressed in a frog suit peddling a stationary bike and then there were people just dressed up standing around with a bowl for money in front of them. It was kind of sad looking but people were donating so I guess it was working for them. We approached the London Eye and Michele was getting nervous. She was very afraid of heights but one of the respected ladies on our Belgium trip had talked her in to going on it. We bought our tickets, got in line, and about 15 minutes later were hopping on board our bubble. It was moving so slow and was really steady. We didn’t feel any movement at all the whole ride. The scenery was gorgeous and I took a ton of pictures. I felt fine inside the bubble except when I looked at the machine itself. It made me a little woozy. As long as I was looking at the horizon I felt fine. Michele felt so comfy that she stood up and took some photos. I was glad she went on it. I think she would have regretted it later.

After the ride we walked back to the hotel and began to pack up things. Michele had decided we needed to get up at 5am to catch our 6:30am taxi. We didn’t eat dinner because we had had such a late lunch but on our walk back to the room we stopped at this tiny grocery store next to Westminster Station. It was a one aisle narrow room and I bought some yogurt. As the evening went on I began to get more and more hungry but I didn’t want to eat at the lounge again. I ended up eating anything I could get my hands on in the room. We packed everything and watched some TV then went to bed. It had been a whirl-wind day and our time in London was just about over.

View from the top - Parliament & Big Ben

Big Adventure - London, Day 7

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Thu, 26 May 2011 01:52:00 +0000

Friday, May 6, 2011

We grabbed some breakfast at a coffee shop just down the street from the hotel. We ate it as we walked to Buckingham Palace about 10 blocks away. The streets were so interesting. Such a mix of new and old and you could just feel the history around you. We passed some local pubs, Channel 4 TV station, a private school, a church, and several walk-up town homes. They were so cool. We got to the palace about 10am and began taking lots of pictures. I have seen that place so many times on TV but being there in person was just cool. The royal wedding of Prince William and Kate Middleton had happened exactly a week before and the whole world was watching. There were still some barricades and press boxes on the grounds but that was all that was left from the event.

The famous changing of the guard was scheduled for 11:30am so we headed to the gift shop. Just outside the shop was a bus stop for the double-decker bus tours. We had looked up the details online ahead of time but checked with the man at the bus stop for costs. We bought our tickets right there on the street and then headed back to the front of the palace to watch the Changing of the Guard. The area went from just a few people standing around to a ton of people!

The Victoria Statue was packed with people and there were about 5-6 people deep standing in front of the palace gates. We saw the marching soldiers line up inside the gate, a marching band, and armed soldiers that all walked in front of the palace. It was just like the 3 o’clock parade at Disney! There were so many people waiting and trying to get a photo and it seemed like they just came out of no where. After the armed group came bye a bunch of people on horse were next. They all went inside the palace gates and lined up in silence. Then one of the soldiers that had a bunch of medals on his jacket started yelling information to the rest of the group. A few at a time started moving around. It was interesting but at some point Michele and I decided we had had enough so we went back to the bus stop and waited for it to arrive.

We took the tour bus to the London Eye area on the River Thames. The walkway along the river had little food shops, the entrance to the London Eye, and a River Cruise. Our bus tour price included a cruise so after we grabbed a bite to eat then boarded a big boat to take a cruise down the river. The River Thames is filthy green. Turns out it has a huge high tide (about 8 ft) and runs right through the middle of London out to the ocean. It was a relaxing ride and we had an entertaining narrator. We got off the boat at the Tower of London. As the boat was turning around to dock we were able to get some great shots of the London Bridge. It was just like I had seen on TV except I hadn’t noticed all the blue trim on the bridge and despite what you have heard... it is not falling down. We didn’t take that tour but instead went inside the Tower of London.

Inside we walked around a lot looking at the old buildings and learned that this was not a happy place back in the day. There was a lot of history around imprisonment, torchure, and death. We toured the Jewel Tower and saw the royal family jewels including crowns, scepters, and tons of gold entertainment and serving pieces. We also toured the Armory Tower where we saw lots of royal armor and gunnery. It was interesting but it was about five or six stories tall with no elevator. It felt like we were never going to reach the bottom on the way out. We were able to catch our double-decker tour bus right outside the Tower complex. We were both really tired from walking so we rode the bus for a long time just taking in the sights. We rode past several memorial and tribute statues, Downing street where the Prime Minister lives, Margaret Thatcher’s house, the very expensive Mayfair neighborhood, through the theater district, and passed the National Gallery. We rode the bus so long that by the time we got off it stopped running for the day.

There are not a lot of places to eat near our hotel so we again ended up eating at the hotel lounge. While we were there we used my iPad to look up theater information and plan our last day in London. After we discovered the tickets were just too expensive for the shows we were interested in, we gave up on that idea. We wanted to go to Kensington Palace, Westminster Abby, and the London Eye for our last day. Michele was really concerned about her bag so we also researched what our options were to replace the bag. Turns out there was a TK Maxx (the UK version of TJ Maxx) right next door to Kensington Palace. We were both shocked and amazed. So our plan was to get going in the morning and catch our tour bus at 9am to get to the Kensington area, buy the bag, go to the Palace, drop the bag at the hotel, then go to Westminster Abby before they closed at 1:30pm. It was aggressive but we felt we could do it. We called it a night and prepared for a jammed packed day.

Big Adventure - Belgium, Day 6

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Wed, 25 May 2011 01:44:00 +0000

Thursday, May 5, 2011

First day of Vacation! After Belgium, I had made arrangements with one of the girls at my office, Michele, to spend a little extra time in Europe. I have known Michele for a few years but I really didn't know her that well. I was looking forward to getting to know her and was so happy to have found someone to travel with me. We took a taxi to the Brussels airport to catch our 12:10 flight on British Airways. Our taxi was late because of traffic and we got caught in it on the way there during morning rush hour. During our ride we talked about the last three days and about some work stuff trying to pass the time. Our flight to London was about an hour long and involved us going back through customs. I got a stamp in my passport when I left Brussels and a new one in London when we arrived. We arrived at the London Heathrow airport about 12:10. London is an hour behind Belgium so we left and arrived at the same time. We were still screwed up on time so I didn't even notice the extra hour. The London airport was huge but we found our way to the Express Train on the lower level.

The Express Train was very comfortable and took us Paddington Station where we needed to switch trains to the Underground to go to Westminster Station near our hotel. We were both so hungry by the time we got to Paddington Station but none of the food options looked appetizing so we just kept moving. The station was really crowded which made traveling with luggage a bit of a challenge. To make it worse, we had to cross over the track we were going on to get to the right side of the platform and there were no elevators. I managed with my luggage but Michele’s suitcase was really big and heavy. There was no way she could get it up the stairs so thank goodness some random guy helped her. Just when we thought it was over it turned out that once we went up the stairs we had to go down them too. Michele was approaching the 'over-it' phase so she just bounced her bag down the stairs one at a time until she got to the bottom. I am sure someone watching us found the whole thing quite amusing but at the time we were not laughing. (Well, at least one of us... )

We finally made it to the train and boarded with a big sigh. It reminded me of a scene from Seinfeld when the whole group was on the subway. As we were riding Michele noticed that she had a hole in the bottom of her big piece of luggage. Nothing had fallen out but it wasn’t going to make it on a plane again with out some attention. Luckily, the train stop at Westminster had elevators. It was just as hard to walk through because of how busy it was but we managed. As we exited the station to get to the street we parked our bags on the sidewalk and a just rested for a moment while we got our barrings. We both looked to the sky at the same time to see the golden face of Big Ben. Bam! It was right there! Welcome to London! It is a moment that I won't forget. We were so crazed with the luggage and train situation to suddenly be greeted with one of the most recognizable buildings in the world was a shocking moment.

Big Ben

We needed to find our hotel and with all our bags we knew we needed a taxi. Every one of them only took cash. We had just gotten into the country and hadn’t have time to exchange our dollars for pounds. I got my iPhone out and looked at where we were and it turned out we were 5 blocks from the hotel so we walked-bags in hand, advertising to the world that we were tourist!

Mint Hotel

We were tired, hungry, and grumpy by the time we checked in. Not a good combination to test our patience at the front desk. We got the key to the room and went upstairs to see how we did booking online. The room was small but clean. It looked like a super nice Ikea dorm room. The bed appeared to be a king bed so we went back down to the front desk to be reassigned. It turned out that they just push together two twin beds. Housekeeping came to the room and unzipped the twins and remade the beds-viola! The room had an Apple computer in it that served as a TV and computer. I also had free Wi-Fi for my iPad--loved that! We went right to the hotel lounge and got food. Michele got the fish and chips she had been talking about for hours and I got a burger. Once we were hydrated and full we both felt so much better. We were both in disbelief that we were in London. It was "surreal but nice..."

It was too late to go to any of the attractions so our first evening we decided to go to the famous Harrod's Department Store. We were finally able to exchange some money at the front desk for our taxi fair. It was an incredibly heartbreaking experience with the exchange rate. Our taxi ride was about 15 minutes and drove us right by Buckingham Palace on the way to the Kensington area. We couldn't believe how close the palace was to the street. The store was amazing. It was five stories tall with a different department on each floor. We spent a lot of time on the toy, pet, candy, kitchenware floors and the Harrod's Brand area. It was so crowded but so exciting. We both went a little crazy with shopping but Michele got several gifts including a barbie-like doll of Princess Catherine for her mom. We must have been there for hours just wandering around. It was the perfect first evening activity. We returned to the hotel and just got appetizers for dinner. It gave Michele and I a chance to talk and plan the next few days. By the time we got back to the room we were both exhausted and called it a night.

Big Adventure - Belgium, Day 5

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Mon, 23 May 2011 23:46:00 +0000

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Last day of meetings! It was my turn to present information about social media. I felt good about my presentation and got lots of questions and comments. The other people from the different countries presented their activities in social media too. It was all very interesting and I liked meeting people who were doing similar work. It was the last day of the bad cafeteria for lunch and then more presentations in the afternoon.

Bruges

Burges Canal

We wrapped up the day and traveled by bus to the city of Bruges which was about an hour away from Aalst. It was another little village town with cobblestone streets and old beautiful buildings. Our bus driver dropped us off because of the narrow streets again and we walked a few blocks to the restaurant. There was a chocolate shop about every three buildings and lace and textile shops about every 10 buildings.

The restaurant, Duc De Bourgogne (Duke of Burgandy), was so old and so fancy. It was on a canal. Thank goodness the menu had already been determined because everything was in French. We had more goose liver as an appetizer, salmon and shrimp with mango sauce, and the main course was duck. I was so full. Dessert was a chocolate mousee. Each dinner I sat with a different group of people. It was nice to get to know everyone and here all their funny stories about work. We also talked a lot about the cultural differences were had each been experiencing on the trip. It was fun to hear everyone's perspective.

Duc De Bourgogne

It was an enjoyable dinner and we walked backed through the low lit streets of Burges to catch our bus. About half of the people on the bus were asleep when we returned to the hotel late that night. Everyone stopped in the lobby before going to their room to say our goodbyes. It had a been such an interesting experience. I was very grateful to have been invited to be a part of the meetings in Belgium but I was so excited to be headed to London on vacation the next day!

Duc De Bourgogne at night

Big Adventure - Belgium, Day 4

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Mon, 23 May 2011 00:39:00 +0000

Tuesday, May 3, 2011
Official Day two was another early bus ride and day full of meetings. We ate at the cafeteria again... totally gross! After lunch we all took a tour of the Tupperware plant. It was interesting to see how the products were made, tested, stored, and distributed. I took some photos and video to commemorate the tour. It was an impressive operation. After the tour it was back to the meeting.

We left at 5pm to travel to Brussels to eat dinner. The bus ride was rough. We got caught in rush hour traffic in the city and the driver kept up a steady back and forth movement to ensure everyone was car sick. We finally stopped because the bus couldn't fit on the road we needed to get to. Everyone got off the bus so relieved to be breathing fresh air and in the process was hit with some pretty cold temperatures! The sun was out but I wore my leather jacket almost the whole time we were there.

We began to walk on some serious cobblestone sidewalks gruffling under our breath about the bus ride. With my head down watching where I walked, I was totally taken by surprise when I looked up to see the entire group in this large courtyard. It took my breath away. It is called the Grand Place and it is one of the biggest tourist destinations in Brussels. The courtyard is lined with guildhall buildings from the 13th century and city hall. The buildings were huge and so ornate, so tall, and some trimmed in gold. It was breathtaking and made the horrible bus ride totally worth it.

Restaurant - La Maison du Cygne

Grand Place - Maison du Roi

Grand Place Courtyard

Everard 't Serclaes

We entered the restaurant and climbed a winding staircase to the top floor. Our restaurant, La Maison du Cygne, was one of the buildings in the courtyard. Just outside the entrance was a famous bronze statue called the Everard 't Serclaes. Touching the arm of the statue was suppose to bring you good luck. Since we were headed to dinner I let the other people in the group do all the touching. The interior was wood with enchanting chandeliers and wall treatments. It looked so elegant. The private room where we were seated had four large tables. Our appetizer was thinly sliced beef with a blob of vanilla ice cream and lettuce on top. Turns out the beef was raw and the ice cream was mixed with parmesan cheese. The menu called it L’Incontournable Carpaccio de boeuf Marine’ a’ l’Huile d’ Olive, Basilic et Glace au parmesan. It didn’t taste too bad but I just couldn’t get the raw part out of my head so I kept it to a sample size. The main entrée was lamb and potatoes and it was followed with a sampling of cheeses and crème brulee for dessert.

The food was super fancy but the service was super slow. I was told that slow meals was the European way. I normally would be fine with that but I was so tired by the time we reached 3 hours I could hardly keep my eyes open. After some lively conversation at my table and the need to stretch, I excused myself to go to the restroom. When I got to the hall where the bathrooms were the labels on each room were in French and there was no sign of the little skirt or pants figures. So I guessed! Luckily, I guessed right! We wrapped things up at the restuarant and began our walk back to our bus. The courtyard was lit up like a palace. It was an amazing scene. We ended up back at the hotel around 11pm but the experience was very memorable and well worth it.

La Maison du Roi at night

Big Adventure - Belgium, Day 3

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Fri, 20 May 2011 03:09:00 +0000

Monday, May 2, 2011

Aalst

Our first official day started at 8am and the jet lag made it feel like 2am. I just pushed through it. Breakfast was quick. I grabbed an apple yogurt, which I discovered is much more runny than US yogurt, and some cereal and joined the group on the motor coach bus for our journey to Aalst. Aalst was a very small town industrial looking area. There were plenty of homes but a lot of businesses, warehouses, and plants. It was about a 30 minute drive to the Tupperware Plant where our meetings were being held. I loved looking at all the surroundings on our drive. The highway was lined by a very rural looking homes and fields. It was very green and reminded me a lot of Indiana. Each day we would drive by three huge, super-techy windmills. They were so big and so out of place.

Giant Wind Machines

Scenery on our Route

Once we arrived at the plant we would head to our conference room for a full day of meetings. My meeting buddy was Simone from Tupperware Italy. We sat by each other every day and would make funny comments to keep things light throughout the day. Lunch was at the employee cafeteria. It was pitiful but it was free.

That night we traveled back to Gent for dinner at another local restaurant called T Pakhuis. It was an old warehouse that had been converted to a restaurant. We were seated on the second floor and were served a set menu. We had the shrimp appetizer again plus a spoonful of cheesy potatoes which were just plain awesome. The second course was Goose Liver! I tried it but I would never order it. It was gray and tasted like fancy bologna that was almost spoiled. The main entree was cod wrapped in seaweed seasoned with fennel. I was so hungry that I ate it, but I discovered that I am not a fan of fennel. Dessert was a sampling of tiramisu, chocolate cake, mousse, and pistachio ice cream. The evening was full of interesting conversation and I left full and ready for bed.

After dinner, we walked back to the hotel taking in all the buildings and the town at night. The buildings were all lit up and magical looking. It actually looked like a scene from a murder mystery but there wasn't any fear or scary music. It was quite the romantic scene except that I was surrounded by people I barely knew from work!

All the streets we walked on in Gent were cobblestone so walking in heels was a bit of a challenge. Luckily, I was able to do some tip-toe moves and I made it back to the hotel without twisting an ankle.

Gent at night

Big Adventures - Belgium, Day 1 & 2

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Thu, 19 May 2011 03:48:00 +0000

I found out in late March that I had been invited to attend a worldwide marketing conference for work. It was in Belgium the first week of May. I always try and document my trips but I just keep it for me. A friend of mine recently pointed out that this would be good blog material. Funny enough, I had a blog! This was my first time traveling to Europe so the following posts are all about my adventures.

Day 1 & 2

Saturday, April 30, 2011, Dad took me to the airport to catch 1:45pm flight to Philadelphia, PA. I met up with Michele from work at the Orlando airport. We flew to Philly to get a connecting flight to Brussels, Belgium via US Airways. Thanks to work, we got to fly 1st Class. I am not sure I will be able to fly coach ever again. You are treated so well and I enjoyed every minute of it. They gave us goody bags, a pillow, a blanket and kept feeding us the whole flight.

The long leg of the of the flight was about 7.5 hours long but luckily it was overnight so all we really wanted to do after dinner was sleep. That proved to be a bit of a challenge because the chairs just didn’t recline enough and the air circulating was so dry that it made it very uncomfortable to breathe. I managed to get a little sleep and we arrived at about 8am on May 1^st (2am Orlando time). We made it through customs without issue and I officially got the first stamp in my passport. We grabbed our bags and met up with some other work people waiting on a ride to the hotel in the city of Gent. We shared a ride with Paul (Asia) and Anshu (India). It was about a 40 minute ride but I was so out of it that it didn't matter. I was like a zombie and thank goodness when we got to the Marriott in Gent our rooms were ready.

Marriott Gent

Canal in Gent

I slept for about 2 hours and then met up with the group to take a tour of Gent. What a beautiful city! Everything looked like a scene from a movie except it was the real deal! Things were so old and so ornate. Buildings are just not made that way any more. There was so much detail and the materials have lasted for 1000s of years. The tour was good. We ended up going to the giant church near the middle of the city called the Saint Bavo Cathedral. The main tower was so tall and when you walked in it was open all the way to the top. There were brick buttresses, arches, artwork, sculptures and lots of wood and stone materials. The decor was so ornate and represented many different religious symbols, people, and stories. It was beautiful but I found myself feeling very indifferent about the religious connection. This happened to me in Montreal too. It was beautiful but for me, it just seemed like the emphasis was on the building and not God. I took lots of pictures and our guide on the tour kept asking questions about world history that no one knew the answers too. He would ask us the trivia questions about European History and everyone in the group was silent. Partly because we were mostly American, but partly because we were all so jet lagged we were ready to nod off.

Outside the Cathedral

Inside Cathedral

After visiting the church we decided to go to a local cafe called Krokantino for real Belgium waffles and beer. The waffles were awesome! Light and crispy and fresh, not heavy like Americanized waffles. The people I was with seemed to really enjoy their beer too. Michele and I returned to the hotel to rest and then met up with the group at 7pm for dinner. We walked to a building across the street from the hotel to a restaurant called De Witte Leeuw. It was on the other side of the river Lys canal. The hotel was located on a canal that ran throughout the city. The buildings were made of stone and wood and had very steep sloping roofs. They looked like an old village town that you would see in a Christmas display! Dinner was chicken and potato soup with some shrimp appetizers, rolls, and ice cream with hot fudge for dessert. It was my first taste of Belgium chocolate and it was everything it was said to be!

It was awesome weather the whole day.

Restaurant, 4th building from right

It was bright and sunny with a cool breeze and about 70 degrees. We stayed at the restaurant for several hours and returned to the hotel for the evening. I was exhausted. Once I got caught up with email and Facebook I tried to sleep. It was a six hour time difference so the jet lag was pretty bad. I couldn’t believe I was in a different country. It was like a dream. It was like I was experiencing time travel.

10 Signs You Are Rude

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Sun, 19 Dec 2010 21:47:00 +0000

There is no excuse for being rude. Situations may be stressful, you may be having a bad day, or you may be completely frustrated, but that doesn't mean you have gained the right to be rude to anyone. Being rude means you have lost control of your own emotions, you are completely oblivious, or you don't care about people's thoughts and feelings.

Most people experience moments of being rude during a low times in their life but a few people are rude all the time. Sadly, the "all the time" group, probably doesn't even know they are being rude. It has become a way of life. The people around them find it easier to ignore the rude behavior rather than to point it out. They ignore the behavior because it shortens their interaction time with the rude person and avoids any confrontation. However, when this behavior goes ignored, it sends the message that how that person is treating you is acceptable and makes certain it will be repeated.

Getting the feedback that you are rude is jolting. No one wants this label. With the right tone and timing, pointing out to someone that what they said or did was unacceptable has a way of dramatically changing how that person interacts with you in the future. Why do we let people be rude to us? Why is it so hard to tell them?

How can you tell if you are being rude? Below are the 10 signs you may be being perceived as rude by other people:

10. You are always late
9. You don't return phone calls or emails
8. You ignore people that you know so you don't have to talk to them
7. You don't tell people when plans change and they
      show up based on the original plan
6. You interrupt people when they are speaking
5. You wait to the last minute to complete work and make
      your emergency someone else's
4. You are brutally honest with people not because it is
      the right thing to do but because it makes you feel
      better about yourself.
3. You purposely leave people out of conversations or
      meetings to gain power from knowledge
2. When someone is out of work for a day or two you are more
      concerned about how their absence will effect your work than
      you are about the reason they have to miss work
1. You don't listen to what people say

The cure for rudeness... stop thinking about yourself, start thinking of others, and tell people when they are being rude to you. The opposite of rude is being kind, mannerly, polite and respectful. Start a routine of respecting other's time, finding ways to care about people, and refusing to ignore rude behavior. What is your label?

Taking Steps to Prevent the Victim Mentality

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Sat, 10 Jul 2010 18:41:00 +0000

Victim: one that is acted on and usually adversely affected by a force or agent

Once you are a victim your life is never the same. Your life comes to an abrupt halt and is forced down a path that you never thought you would have to go. The new path is really bumpy at the start. There are potholes, obstacles, and it is hard to see in front of you but easy to see what you have had to leave behind.

No one wants to be a victim but inevitably we all will be one in our lifetime, if not many times. Whether it is an attack, a burglary, a broken heart, job loss or something else, we all will experience it at some point in our lives. The severity will vary with each person and each incident but there only seems to be two results of being a victim. Some people are able to move on with their lives and continue down the new path of their life while others get caught going in circles at the beginning of their new path.

When you are going in circles it holds you back from greatness. You waste precious time rehashing the past and remain unhappy for a long time. When you take action, take steps, you are using your time wisely and you can turn your focus to things that will bring you or other people happiness.

So how do you know which victim group you are in?

The people that get caught going in circles demonstrate some common behaviors:

1. They talk about their situation every day. They are continually trying sort out what happened and in the process seek empathy from other people.

2. They think that other things that happen in their life all relate back to the moment their life changed when they became a victim.

3. They focus on trying to undo what happened. They think that if they could just go back in time and fix the situation things would be back to normal again.

The people that are able to keep going on their path and move on also demonstrate some common behavior:

1. They accept their new path and keep taking steps to move further down it.

2. They try not to talk about their situation all the time and prevent people from even knowing that they are on a new path. They just want their new path to appear to be normal. They talk about their situation when there is a better story to tell.

3. They learn from their experience and try to help others by preventing them from being a victim or by helping those who need to take those first steps down their own new path.

When you are sent down a new path in your life, one that you would not have chosen, you have a choice to make. It is completely normal to feel emotional, that the situation was unfair, and that it didn't have to happen. Being a victim comes with confusion and emotion and it takes time for your heart and mind to heal. However, being emotional and confused doesn't mean you can't start taking steps onto your new path. The more steps you take the more the healing happens. Everyone has to take steps at their own pace but what is most important is that the steps are happening. If you stop moving forward you can get stuck going in circles.

You can't go back in time but you can choose how you spend your time moving forward. Your new path is your new normal. Just keep taking steps.

Top 5 Signs You Are Stuck In Your Ways

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Sat, 19 Jun 2010 14:39:00 +0000

Over the last year or so I have encountered a large amount of people that are stuck in their ways. This condition comes in a variety of forms but they all seem to have one thing in common: victims can only see life one way. They are unable to deal with change easily and have difficulty buying in to new ideas. When presented with a new idea, they often will seem receptive at first but quickly come up with reasons why the new idea won't work. They usually end up doing exactly what they have always done.

Unfortunately this condition can be contagious. Carriers will try and influence their co-workers but are not always successful. Co-workers will recognize when someone is stuck in their ways because they become frustrated working with them. It feels like the victim can't see the bigger picture, always seems to shoot down new ideas, and easily becomes uncomfortable when discussing change. At times, having a meeting with someone with this condition feels like you are hitting your head against the wall.

I never want to get this condition. I don't want to be the person that people don't want to work with and doesn't get invited to important meetings because they think I will slow down progress. So how do you know if you are stuck in your ways?

Top 5 Signs You Are Stuck In Your Ways:

1. You talk about the past everyday.
Do you find yourself always saying things like: "we used to do it this way," or "we tried that a few years ago," or "when Susie worked here everything worked" or "it is a lot better than it use to be." When your frame of reference is always focused on your past experiences and storytelling you may be stuck in your ways.

2. You think that new people joining your company need time to conform to the company culture before they can really make an impact.
Sometimes new people notice things that are out of whack before anyone else. Have you noticed that you tend to disregard new people's opinions until they gain more experience in your organization? Do you feel like the new people have a lack of respect for everything that the company has accomplished in the past? Do you find that the new people are complaining about the way the company does business or how a certain process works? If you tend to think new people are negative unnecessarily you may be stuck.

3. You have been in the same job with the same company for more than 7 years.
Does the thought of having to pack up your office make you cringe? Have you applied and interviewed for a different job over the last 7 years? Have you been asked what you want to do for your next job and not known the answer? If the thought of changing jobs makes you nervous or anxious you may be set in your ways.

4. You have a routine at your office that you do everyday.
Is there something you have to do everyday before you can begin working? Do you have desk items or a favorite coffee mug that you panic when you can't find it? Do you park in the same spot, take the same route to your office, or use the same bathroom stall? Do you eat with the same people at lunch at the same table every day? If you answered yes to any of these questions, you may be stuck.

5. You are hesitant to volunteer for new project because it means more work.
Are you skeptical of new projects or always thinking about all of the problems the project is going to run into? Do you feel that taking on a new project would be too disruptive to your current work? Would the new project be too disruptive to your schedule? If you answered yes to any of this questions, you may be stuck.

So how do we avoid getting stuck in our ways or how do we get un-stuck?

I think as we get older, we will naturally get into a groove with how we spend our time and energy. We find life shortcuts that work and we stick to them. At what point do these familiar things cross over into a paralyzing and unproductive situation? There are some preventative steps you can take. No one wants to be or wants to work with victims of this condition.

Here are some suggestions that can help:

1. Keep Learning
Take a class at a local college, read a book, attend leadership training, or take the time to learn a new computer program or web site feature. Subscribe to a blogger or podcast, join an organization outside of work you are passionate about, or spend time with someone you want to learn from at least once a month. As long as you are learning you will have an endless supply of ideas and new stories to tell.

2. Break Up Your Routines
Take a different route to work. Use a different mug or skip the coffee break at 3pm. Keep mixing up how you spend your time. The fewer routines you have the more you exercise your mind. Try something new everyday and create variety in your life.

3. Surround yourself with others that are not stuck
New people that join an organization are going through change. They could use a friend to help them adjust but they can also be great people to help you see the same things from a new perspective. Listen to the new ideas or their experiences from other companies. You may be able to pick up something you can use or improve your work. Who are the people in your organization that you feel are innovative? Get to know them and find out how they approach their work.

4. Take on work that is new
Force yourself to learn new things by seeking out new projects. You will get to network with new people, explore new areas of your company, and add valuable experience to your resume or year-end review. Not only will new work help you stretch your brain but it might help you end up with some great recognition or a promotion.

5. Interview
Always be aware of your tenure. Staying at a job or the same company is not a bad thing as long as growth is happening. One great way to keep you on your toes and get you using your critical thinking skills is to apply for a promotion. Don't just do it to do it. Be sure you are applying for something that you want to consider doing. After the interview process is over make sure you get feedback on why you were or weren't selected. If you like what you are doing or feel it isn't the right time to switch jobs, schedule informational interviews with people that you want to network with or just learn more about their business or job.

Just being aware of your own tendencies is half the battle. Treating this condition is a personal thing. No one can cure this condition unless they want to be cured. Hopefully now, you feel like you have a taste of the right medicine.

What do you do to make sure you are not stuck in your ways?

The Big Screen Litter-Bugs

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Wed, 09 Jun 2010 02:20:00 +0000

I love going to the movies. There is something so exciting about being in a large room with a ton of people watching a film on a huge screen. We like to be entertained together. I have recently been to a lot of movies and I can't help but wonder about something each time I go.

At what point did it become okay to leave your trash for someone else to clean up?

We are taught as kids to clean up after ourselves. It is against the law to throw trash on the road and highly frowned upon to throw it on the ground anywhere. So why is it okay in a movie theater? The employees of the theater even make it easy by standing with bags as people walk out and the trash bins are always available. I have never worked at a theater or even been in a custodial-like job but watching people pick up after grown adults just seems so wrong. No wonder a box of $.25 popcorn costs $5. The theater has to pay someone to pick it up and throw it away.

This just seems like a no-brainer.

Use Passion For Good

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Tue, 27 Apr 2010 02:59:00 +0000

I recently discovered the newest excuse for less than professional behavior in the workplace... proclamations of having passion. Passion is: a strong liking or desire for or devotion to some activity, object, or concept.

Maybe you have witnessed this excuse? When a topic or decision is being discussed in a meeting and someone: begins talking over people, interrupting, speaking loudly, strongly disagreeing without regard to others' feelings, ignoring others who try to express their thoughts, using sharp edged language, or getting frustrated when they don't get their way. Lately, I have heard from several people that the reason a certain people act this way is because they are passionate about the subject at hand. When did being passionate about something make it okay to be unprofessional? When did this become acceptable workplace behavior?

I was always under the impression that having passion about something was a positive thing. People long for spending more time with things or people they are passionate about in life. Passion creates and endless supply of energy that people need to do great things. Finding what your passionate about is an amazing process. You can't plan it, force it, or buy it. When you realize what your God given passion is and you are able to live it there are few levels of joy that can match the feeling. So how can this priceless feeling of joy turn into a situation where it hurts other people in the workplace?

The moment someone disrespects another person in a meeting the passion that person has about the subject matter at hand becomes useless and unwanted. The so-called passionate person quickly becomes viewed as out of control, rude, disrespectful, and not a team player. It becomes difficult to work with this person because of how they make you or others feel. You can find yourself not wanting them involved in projects or discussions because of how they dominate the conversation and how they cause a loss of momentum with the work. You will begin having side conversations with the other people you need to work with on projects and only bring in the passionate person at the end of the process. You end up spending more time managing this person and being less productive.

At no time is having passion about something an excuse for disrespecting people or for being unprofessional at work. Being passionate and professional are not mutually exclusive things. When you put them together you will find greatness. You will see people flocking to work with these kind of people. Passionate and professional people have huge networks, get assigned to big projects, and are always invited to meetings or to be apart of the decision making process. They are a pleasure to work with and they inspire you.

Are you the one others manage or are you the one that people want to work with? Be passionate about your work relationships. Be passionate about how you treat people. Use your passion for good.

The Cure For Worry

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Mon, 09 Mar 2009 00:06:00 +0000

I am a recovering worry-aholic but I have found the cure.

Every time you are in the throws of uncertainty you start to worry. People try to help you by telling you not to worry. Which at that moment, is probably the hardest if not the most impossible thing for you to do.

With the uncertain times happening in our economy and the drama that is on the news every night it is hard not to worry. None of us know what the outcome will be and jobs, investments, and the comforts of life are all at risk.

People say, "try not to think about it" or "stay busy." While these are good tactics they are only temporary because the worry has a way of creeping back in to your thoughts. You can only stay so busy for so long and trying not to think about it means you have to think about something else which if you could do that you wouldn't be worrying in the first place.

Is there a cure for worry? A 12 Step program? A quick-fix pill? Does it take hyponotism or therapy? No, not for me. It was simple and it was right in front of me the whole time.

Let Go - Give up Control.

It was brought to my attention recently that I wasn't in control and never had been. The tighter I tried to control things the more stressed I became. Once I fully understood that the person really in control was more experienced, in the know about what going on, and had my best interest at heart it was easy for me to let go and trust Him.

I still have my moments but they are short-lived now that I know what what I need to do. By trusting and letting go of the control I can live with uncertainty without the fear and without the paralyzing physical effects worry can bring. Now I have peace and confidence that things will be just fine no matter what.

If you need to know this worry-free helper He is easy to find. Just close your eyes and pray and He will be there. God is the worry warrior. Let Him fight the battle for you. After all, He already knows the game plan and has a perfect record.

25 "Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? 26 Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? 27 And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life? [7] 28 And why are you anxious about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, 29 yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. 30 But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is alive and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? 31 Therefore do not be anxious, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' 32 For the Gentiles seek after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. 33 But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. 34 "Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.
Matthew 6:25

Not a Fan of Halloween

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Sat, 01 Nov 2008 15:12:00 +0000

I don't like Halloween.

My mom wasn't a big fan either which may have had some influence on my lack of affinity for it. Now that I am all grown up, I can honestly say I don't like it. Part of my dislike comes from the idea that Halloween glamorizes evil things but there is one thing that bothers me more. It really creeps me out when people dress up and pretend to me something they are not. Actors do this all the time but it doesn't bother me because I know they are pretending. I go to the theater expecting to see people portray characters and they are on a far away stage or movie screen. With Halloween, people are dressed up and standing or sitting right in front of me. I don't know if they are pretending to be someone else or if this is who they really are and this is their moment to break loose. I find this unsettling.

It seems like Halloween gives people permission to break the rules of appearances and behavior and I am forced to accept it. I went to a public building yesterday where any other day I know I would have found professionals happily doing their job. But on October 31st they came to work dressed as a cheerleader, Elf, Graduate, Golfer, Punk Rocker, African Royalty, a Sheik, and a few others that I had no idea what they were trying to look like. It just didn't fit. These people looked ridiculous. It is one thing to go out at night and join in the Halloween tradition of treat-or-treating or attend a Halloween costume party but at work... there is no reason for it.

I am all about having fun at work or going to a party with friends but Halloween isn't one of those times where you will see me going all out. Talk to me about Christmas or the 4th of July! Those are my holidays no special clothing required!

Better to be Safe or Generous?

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Sun, 12 Oct 2008 02:56:00 +0000

Better to be Safe or Generous?

I was driving around town today and found myself being propositioned for money by two very different types of people at two different stop lights. The two people were in the median of a busy intersection asking drivers for money.

One person was an older man, with dirty skin, long hair, and something wasn't quite right with his eyes. He was holding a sign written on cardboard asking for help.

At a different light about 10 miles away, I found a middle-aged woman holding a white bucket with a sign on it referencing a local church and asking for donations.

Both people were aggressively weaving between waiting cars and really working the crowd. I have seen this kind of thing a lot lately around town. Especially the men with the cardboard signs.

I was always told not to acknowledge or communicate with a homeless person for safety reasons. I was also told that the chances of a homeless person having an addiction or mental problem were really high. It was suggested that that if I really wanted to help them that you were suppose to give them food rather than money. This way they won't use the money to buy more alcohol or drugs and will benefit by having a good meal.

As far as the woman representing the church, her cause seemed noble but I couldn't help but wonder why this was necessary and if standing in the middle of the street was really the best way to go about raising money. I even wondered if she was really representing the cause she said she was or if she was just using that as a front for personal gain. It seemed strange that there were only two people with buckets at this big intersection. If it was such a big fund raiser, where were the other members of the church? I would rather give money directly to the church or organization to make sure the funds get to where they are suppose to go. Not to mention how dangerous it is to be stepping in and out of traffic!

What I found really surprising today, was the amount of people rolling down their car windows and donating! At the light with the man the car in front of me emptied his car of change right in the man's hands. At the light with the woman, the car in front of me gave her a stash of bills--maybe $5.

This got me thinking... was I being stingy with my money or just safe? Am I a tight-wad or just a smart citizen? What are your thoughts?

Is it Still Cool?

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Sun, 05 Oct 2008 22:14:00 +0000

Is riding around playing loud music from your car still considered cool or am I just getting old?

I was listening to the latest CD from TobyMac (a contemporary Christian music guy). He has a great sound and a great message to share. The best part is you can actually understand his lyrics! His music is so energizing and it really gets you going. Why do you instantly feel the need to turn it up?

When they started putting radios in cars I can imagine this was the thing to do to show off your new gadget. Now, everyone has a radio, CD player and MP3 connection in the car so why do we still need to crank it up? Is it about the music? Is it about a need to feel the beat in your body from the bass? Is it to get attention or a way to share with others what you are in to?

When I am driving and I hear people blasting their music I always have thoughts about how silly and immature those people are yet today I found myself among them. It is no secret how bad prolonged exposure to high volumes are for your hearing and I certainly don't advocate doing this often.

Nothing is wrong with appreciating a good song or wanting to share it. Maybe the instinct to play it loud is just a way to tell everyone driving around you, "You can be cool at any age and there is nothing like a good song--check this one out!"

Daytime TV - What is it good for?

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Fri, 19 Sep 2008 02:27:00 +0000

I had an extra day off this week and was able to catch some oldie-but-goodie reruns. A few episodes of the Andy Griffith Show, the Cosby Show, Little House on the Prairie and Home Improvement. What happened to these kind of shows? They all had such good messages for the whole family and they each had strong dad characters. Watching these shows is like putting on your favorite robe and slippers and eating apple pie.

Now we watch reality show dads and dysfunctional family chaos and call that entertainment. Or during the day it is soaps and talk shows that all portray dysfunctional relationships and glamorise lifestyles that are unhealthy and leave everyone unhappy.

Is this really how the world is today? Are the days of story-lined family lessons and after-school specials gone forever? Are they not interesting anymore? Is the norm the abnormal? Why do we all get so sucked in to the rubber-necking happening on TV?

I think I will stick to my old shows. It does make me wonder what the re-runs of the future will be like. Will reality show reruns be as interesting to people as they are now or will we still be watching Andy Griffith and Bill Cosby?

Surprise!

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Sat, 30 Aug 2008 21:30:00 +0000

Since the recent announcement of the Republican Vice President pick I got to thinking... when was the last time I was surprised? I can't remember the last time I experienced a genuine - I had no idea moment. Not that this is a bad thing. Part of me likes to be surprised but there is a strong part of me that likes things to be predictable or expected. But for a moment last night I was amazed and delighted about the fact that something was fresh and new on the news. It was actually interesting.

Between the news shows over reporting and gossip magazines being super nosey, most public figure behavior is rarely a surprise. People are hounded by these types of media who try and piece together a story. We hear about small pieces of information along the way and then at some point the whole story comes out to no one's surprise. There has been so much speculation about the VP picks. News shows have analyzed things so much that they seem to think they had figured everything out.

So imagine my surprise when all of the news networks had no idea that Governor Sarah Palin was the VP pick. It was sort of fun. I had forgotten what is was like to hear something for the first time and think to myself, Wow! I had no idea.

In all our fascination with knowing every intricate detail of a public figures' lives have we been missing out on the simple joy of being surprised?

Listen to Mom when it comes to voting...

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Fri, 25 Jul 2008 12:48:00 +0000

Words of wisdom from my mom... "I was at the clubhouse yesterday picking up the mail when a neighbor volunteered that he wasn't voting. I have learned NEVER to encourage people to vote. He said both of the candidates were awful and that he really wanted to vote for Hillary..."

I am not a big fan of either presidential candidate this year but the thought of not voting never crossed my mind. There was too much effort put into my right to be able to vote to even consider not doing it. One of the main reasons I will be voting is out of respect for those who fought for this right. That being said, it would be irresponsible to just show up and fill in the bubbles without thought just because I can. Just as important of the act of voting itself is making sure you are educated on the issues and the candidates.

Even though you don't like any of the candidates they are our choices-they are it! Figure out which one most represents your views and concerns because they are all we have whether you like them or not. Placing a vote in an election means you care deeply about our country and if you can't determine which candidate would most represent your views or concerns then you shouldn't place a vote. It would be just as disrespectful, irresponsible, and unpatriotic to show up and place a vote without some level of conviction, as not voting at all.

So the next time you here someone say they are not going to vote, don't encourage them to vote, encourage them to get educated and take full responsibility for their right to vote.

John McCain

Barack Obama

Can Excellence Be Taught?

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Sun, 13 Jul 2008 20:39:00 +0000

I had the opportunity to spend some time with my nephew this past week. We were doing chores at my house.

I don't think cleaning house is anyone's favorite activity but it is always better when you have help. When your 6 years old, it is only fun if it is a game or if you get to use the cool tools and gadgets. We started pretty well when we got out the attachments out for the vacuum. That lasted about 10 minutes before he got bored and wanted to watch TV. I ended up finishing the job and pushing him to finish all the other assignments he was given. I wasn't really expecting a significant amount of work to get done but I was surprised by his behavior.

At work, we all have to do things we don't like to do from time to time. We have all been in those situations where we were so excited to take on a project and then realized half way in to it that it wasn't exactly what you thought it would be. When this happens at work though... you just do it. You push through and complete the task. If your boss asks you to do something, you do it and you do it to the best of your ability.

This got me thinking... how do you teach people to do the best they can with everything they do? There are sure plenty of people out there who didn't get this lesson growing up and once they reach adulthood is it too late? I have worked with a few people in the past who were content with average or the minimum. As a leader, can you develop the habit of excellence in an adult?

As an Aunt, how much do you push a lesson of excellence with kids? I shared this story with someone else and they said, "he is only 6, what do you expect?" I understand that he is still very young, but don't you have to start developing this type of attitude from the very beginning? How do you instill excellence in children so they grow up wanting to work hard and putting their best effort towards everything?

Are they learning the right lesson if you keep making them do the job over until it is done right? How do you develop the habit of excellence in kids without coming across as a control freak or leaving with them with feelings inadequacy? How do you keep from becoming that parent the child describes in therapy as an adult as, "no matter what I did it was never good enough for them?" How can you correct the child in a way that they will want to do their best not because of a fear of getting in trouble with the parent but because it is the right thing to do?