Ones for Wheeler

For Chris Kreidl

2011-11-11T12:33:00.000-08:00

As a child of veterans, how appropriate that I post a blog on Veteran's Day. I am also a veteran blogger as I at once had three blogs--my favorite being a Coffee Commuters blog in which I co-wrote with my friend Lind Say. Well, I don't recall her writing more than one post, but she contributed by modelling and posing with bikini baristas.

Note that ever since I've became a competitive cyclist, I've been ridiculed for not drinking alcohol, eating only salad and apples, and I've even been called "Not Fun"! Can you even believe that? These comments aren't coming from people who are jealous of my cycling abilities or my enormous salary--though they may be jealous of my large ass--but instead from people who miss the days when I would go out drinking and stay out late and start shenanigans and howl at the moon and get up and go play outside all day. But now instead I'll respond to invitations of "fun" with "As if!!! It's my recovery day," or "I might pull a hammie." or "I might gain an ounce." I do, however, spend an incredible amount of time on the internet, googling ailments, watching Netflix on my ex, ex boyfriend's account (At what time is it not important to note which generation of ex you are referring to? And could I instead say, my ex twice removed? What does twice removed even mean? I'll google it later.), downloading to Strava, and reading Facebook.

Anyway, my life sort of reminds me the Revenge of the Nerds--but only when they get moved to the gymnasium and they all just lie around, play cards, or perhaps watch Poindexter rehearse on his violin. (The rest of the movie is WAY more exciting than mine today.)

And this Revenge of the Nerds reference is appropriate because I am now residing in Tucson, Arizona, for the winter. And while I was riding through the University of Arizona campus yesterday, I was listening to Simple Minds radio and was strangely reminded of Revenge of the Nerds. I thought it was the combination of the 80's music and the college campus but I quickly found out from my real life friend--not google or a Facebook friend that I've never met--that the movie was filmed here in Tucson and that's why it looked familiar. That made my day.

By the way, this is totally what our pep talks are like during stage races.

Anyway, so Chris Kreidl, who reminded me on Facebook that I haven't blogged in two months, my life is a bit uneventful at the moment, which is why I haven't blogged. And I could take a small tidbit and blow it up into a multi-paragraph, comical blog post--but it's Veteran's Day for vet's sake! Take a moment and thank your vets for their service. (P.S. I thanked my mom, ex-marine, who served in the first Iraq war, for her service. And she said, "What are you talking about?" so instead I thanked her for her service as an employee at Stewart's Ice Cream shop when she was young.)

Being a CTS Athlete

2011-09-08T14:33:00.000-07:00

As a pro athlete, I have very high expectations of my coach, Jason Tullous, at Carmichael Training Systems (CTS). We've been working together almost a year (one of the longest relationships I've ever had in my life) and I would definitely give him a "Like" on Facebook. After I recently migrated to Colorado Springs, he must have thought I'm ready to take my training to the next level because he arranged for me to take a tour of the CTS "headquarters"

I thought it was just going to be a meet and greet and didn't think too much about it. I was about to discover, however, that to become the best, when choosing a coach, you must look beyond the laymen fundamentals of boring stuff such as experience, proven success, a customized training plan, and regular feedback. What matters even more are all the perks that come with these fundamentals. Yes, it's these perks that when combined with the right coach, will give you that edge you need to take it to the next level. Here are the perks I learned about...

1. Fountain Sports Drinks and Gels

Hard day of ASDFJKL'ing? Have a drink and perhaps a gel from the buffet tray.

2. Indoor Race Simulations

Don't tell Levi Leipheimer, but this CTS client totally kicked his ass in this stage of the US Pro in Colorado (I saw it!). And yeah, she is reading a magazine.

3. A Wattage Cottage Workout Room

Watts don't grow on trees. You gotta build strength to break 2000 watts on your recovery rides.*
*Breaking 2000 watts on your recovery rides is not endorsed by CTS but rather hyperbole used by the author to portray an element of humor.

4. An HGH Room

Sleep is required for lots of HGH, so why not put a massage/bedroom next to your cubicle?

5. Yellow Jerseys

You don't necessarily need to have earned it yourself--you just need to have one.

6. A Personalized Cubbyhole

This dude won't be back for awhile, so I've agreed to timeshare his space. (I think the walnut shade really looks nice with my jacket.)

7. "Retired Pro Seek n' Find" Picture Books

Jeff was convinced he was in this book but could only find half of his arm and a centerfold of his teammate.

8. A Smiley Support Staff

Special Ops guy Jim Rutberg, and Adam Pulford, the guy who set up my training account--no, he doesn't read my daily training (a.k.a. diary entries), not even the laughable "boo hoo I'm going to crack entries." I asked.

Anyway, so yeah, it was a good day to see what all goes into the CTS operations and meet some of the staff who cross checks my training plans. I felt pretty cool to get the VIP treatment and like I was some famous journalist with my expensive iPhone camera, snapping pictures and asking poignant questions like "Can these computers access the Internet?" and "Really, now, what's a high maintenance client--like how many calls exactly?"

Oh yeah, I forgot to mention that Chris Carmichael and I are like best friends now. Yeah. Whatever, you know, no biggie. Well, OK, I didn't actually meet him but I took a picture of his office, so you know...it's like the same thing...

Seriously, I want to be friends with anyone who has two desks in their office. Don't you?

Morning of a Pro Cyclist

2011-08-24T23:51:00.000-07:00

My interactions with my teammate, Jo Kiesanowski, are too good to keep to myself. They are deserving of a movie. (I've never made an Xtranormal movie and sigh when I see yet another one online, but I couldn't help myself.)

Falling Down

2011-08-22T23:53:00.000-07:00

Ever since I started cycling in 2009, I've gotten a lot of crap for not knowing much about the history and who is who in cycling. I remember one of my conversations with my friend, Kele, who mentioned Kristin Armstrong, and I stared at her blankly. She was appalled--not in a "Oh, ha ha, you're cute type of way," but more in a "I want you to push you off your bike into those thorns" type of way. (In my defense, I had only been cycling about six months at the time. P.S. I was told once in a corporate review that I needed to work on not being defensive. Noted.)

Anyway, I googled Kristin and after phishing through results and images, I learned she wasn't "Kristen" and she also wasn't Lance's wife (I knew who Lance was, of course....Note: Defensive). And I really did feel embarrassed that I didn't know who she was, given she is a prominent figure in the women's peloton. I spent some time researching other women cyclists and teams, and some of my friends would tutor me without being patronizing. And after some time, I felt pleased with my progress and equipped to chime in "Oh yeah, wasn't it just great?!!!" during the next social hour about Famous Cyclist X, who won Race Y that I can't pronounce during a year before I was born or when I was listening to Michael Jackson's Bad tape regularly...as opposed to randomly in the 2011s.

Anyway, but it turns out that as I continue racing and think I'm rapidly expanding my wikipedia of cycling, I am constantly hearing names and races of people I don't recognize. And I could just sit there and nod and give the "Oh, totally. I'm SOOO engaged in this conversation," nods but my attention span just can't handle those types of conversations. So, if I hear Davis Phinney and say, "Hey, is he the dad of Taylor Phinney?" I then immediately find out that no one is impressed that I know who Taylor is but they are more appalled that I don't know who Davis Phinney is. And this happens over and over and over and over again. And back to Google and YouTube I go to figure out how I could be so stupid and not know these facts, forgetting that I just learned what a derailleur was in 2009 and I can proudly point out a top tube on a bike like a 1st grader pointing out California on a map. (Am I being defensive again? I'll never get that Star Employee of the Quarter parking spot--this actually exists--at this rate.)

So, hey, it's true. I like to be liked, but after so much "Bah ha ha ha--get this, Jennifer doesn't know who Blah von Blah Blah Blah is. Mwhahahah." I had enough. I guess I had a Michael Douglas Falling Down moment (You don't know what that is? Ba ha ha ha, you're so stupid) where I parked my car under the LA freeway, grabbed my briefcase, and decided I had had enough. My "Oh I'm just a dumb cyclist who doesn't know what I 'should' know" mindset became "Hey, I'm Jennifer F-in' Wheeler. I was in a SRAM commercial with Nick "I-won-Flanders" Nuyens (I googled him before writing this.) Who the hell are you?"

My Falling Down liberation moment

I took this new liberating outlook to Tour of Colorado since I'm in Colorado Springs with my teammate, Jo Kiesanowski, and tried it out with some Bike Industry A-Listers.

I'm Jennifer Wheeler. And, uh, your hand is like covering up a sponsor.

I'm Jennifer Wheeler, and you're too tall for this photo.

I'm Jennifer Wheeler. I make the faces here, buddy.

Orange Hair Guy. Yep, that's it. No introductions needed.

I'm Jennifer Wheeler. Who the...oh and you're my team director. Er...how's it going?

I'm Jennifer Wheeler. Oh and I love you--no snotty attitude needed.

I'm Jennifer Wheeler. Who the hell...gave you those ribs? chomp chomp chomp

I'm Jennifer Wheeler, and we're posing for your new Twitter profile pic.

I'm Jennifer Wheeler. And we're working on pronouncing "Roar" and "Parrots" correctly.

And I guess the lesson I learned is that I actually prefer to meet people for the first time without knowing who they are and/or much about them, so that I can form my own impression without it being clouded with random bike facts or gossip--and girrrrrl, cyclists can gossip.

That way I won't ever want to ask Bob Roll (Zing! Name drop!) to say "Tour "day" France" or I won't feel embarrassed for asking if this dude in the Radio Shack kit on the Echelon Gran Fondo charity ride is Chris Warner or Horner, and most importantly I won't lose my "gift of the gab" that will only work with a loose filter that isn't worried about saying something dumb to someone who is really important. I can just be a normal human and say everyday things like, "Hi. C'mere and get your photo with me. I wanna put you on my blog."

P.S. *whisper* I'm writing this in Jeff Pierce's (ZING!) basement. (I'm not held captive. He's married to my teammate who I'm staying with in CO Springs.) (Oh and I googled him a while back and that stage he won in the Tour. I can't pronounce it.)

SRAM Develops "The Schneider"

2011-08-02T18:37:00.000-07:00

I'm in Chicago for Tour of Elk Grove. So, in between my acclimation sessions of drinking hot Americanos outside of hipster coffee shops and checking Facebook to see if I, too, have been tagged in High Heels magazine, I thought hmmm... maybe I could visit my sponsor, SRAM.

What I thought would be a quick tour around the headquarters turned into an interview, modelling session, and bloopers reel. Once I realized what I had gotten into, I quickly took a moment to remember the lessons I've learned from America's Next Top Model and my teammate and worked that shoot.

The visit started by meeting all the SRAMees (Or is it SRAMers? Or is it SRAMies?) and seeing where they test products from the future, have meetings in rooms named after cities, develop components that float in the air...and where they eat food. Queue US Weekly mag's "Stars are just like us"

Then quickly after my kitchen tour ended, I heard the click of a new Canon, the flash of a light, and despite my resistance, my jazz hands busted out from my pockets, and soon after came what has been coined as "The Schneider."

The Schneider has been passed down generations, originating in the 1500's from the contrapposta stance.

My teammate, Sam Schneider, has made some minor adjustments, particularly because the wide stance of the legs was not very flattering for females--especially females with muscular legs, and in the process, has perfected the pose, thus creating The Schneider.

As professional cyclists, we have many media photos and as you can see, well, my stance has taken some time to perfect.

However, with many hours of lessons and practicing, I made my Schneider debut and nailed the pose at the SRAM shoot--so well that you don't even notice that I'm whispering "OMG! OMG! OMG!" I did, however, think about a quick post up in victory after this moment. (I'm pretty sure I can do two hands OFF the bike.)

So, thank you, SRAM for the tour and for the now patented "The Schneider." P.S. I also listened to a program on This American Life today called "When Patents Attack"--I'm just sayin'...

Here is the SRAM Road Diaries Interview. You, too, can support "The Schneider," by liking Team TIBCO and SRAM on Facebook. Word.

I Lava Strava!

2011-06-15T14:24:00.000-07:00

What? I saw that on a license plate somewhere. Really. No...I didn't. I've lied to you. It's true. I made it up...just a few seconds ago. Hard to believe, yes, I know.

That was my poor introduction in an attempt to make this news even more awesome than it already is...(and Fresh Prince says)...Drums please!....I have Strava and Garmin discount codes for you! They work, too. Use them because I get credit when you do! Yay for credit...and scratch and sniff stickers from the days of elementary school that look like grapes w/ eyeballs and say "Grape Job!"

(If you don't know what Strava is, go to the Website or skip down to my Q&A.)

Here is an example of an easy ride I did, just cruising around Mercer Island. (What? No, I didn't photoshop anything. 5,000 watts is pretty typical for me with a 130bpm heartrate, give or take a few watts.)

Strava Subscription Discount Code
Promotion code is: TTJENNIFER10
If you do not already have a Strava account, go to www.strava.com and click on "Sign Up" and create your account. Once logged in, click on "Free Plan (upgrade)" in the top-right of the nav bar. You will see a box to enter your Gift Certificate.

If you already have a strava account, click on your settings in the upper right corner of the page, and then click to "Account." Then click "change plans" and enter your promo code on the following page.

Garmin 500 Discount Code
Promotion code is: TTJENNIFER25
Step 1: Go to https://www.strava.com/register/bundle. Create your Strava account and enter credit card and shipping information.
Step 2:Click on the link "Have a promotion code" just below where you enter your credit card info. In the box that appears, enter your promotion code.

Step 3: click on the "Sign up" button at the bottom and confirm the price of $224 (plus CA tax if applicable) on the next page

Now then, here is the Strava Q&A...

Q: What is Strava?
A: It's an online bike club basically where you can upload your rides (with a Garmin or the Strava App on a smartphone) and then compare rides and compete against others who have ridden that ride. You can also look at Pro riders and follow them in tours to view their data, speeds, etc.

Q: I record all my data in a journal. Why would I want to publish my data on the scary Internet for others to see?
A: Because journals are like paper checks--get with the now, Granny! But seriously, it's a great place to keep all your data and compare your PRs on rides you do every day. The program compares your speeds/distances and informs you if you got your PR and shows you how far off or AHEAD of others you were on rides. Plus, I don't know why people are so secretive of their training data. Do you really think others are taking the time to analyze your data and create a training plan exactly like yours so that they can beat you in the next race? I don't think it really works that way. If it did, I will probably beat Ben King from Radioshack in his next race because well, I saw that he did 5x10s on Strava...and I did those, too...once....

Q: I already pay to use another program to house my data. What makes this better?
A: Well, in most programs you have to go back in your calendar to compare your progress. For example, I usually do my shorter intervals on the same stretch of road for consistency. To compare my workouts in the "other" programs, I would have to pull up my current workout and then make notes of my speed/power/HR and then fish through my workouts until I found the last time I did that workout and then compare the numbers manually. In Strava, it will automatically show you your previous performances on that stretch and give you little QOM trophies or medals--which are basically as good as the "Grape Job!" stickers I mentioned earlier.

Q: I ride for fun and am not fast. I'll never get these virtual medals, so what's in it for me?
A: Well, besides all the other features I described, it's a great place to record your rides and look at maps of the distance you've covered. It tells you all the features like elevation gained/loss, average speed, and even estimates your power for you. Strava also has several competitions and sends out REAL prizes--instead of just virtual medals--to those people who have recorded the most feet climbed (it doesn't care how fast you've climbed), the farthest distance ridden, and the most rides on a monthly basis. There's a leaderboard where you can see your progress. So go climb a mountain 7 times a week and you'll probably get some cool schwag.

Q: Is "I Lava Strava!" the best rhyme you could come up with?
A: Yes. You have a better idea? I'd love to hear it. Seriously. I don't hate, just congratulate.

And to close, the source for my "Drums Please!" quote

Bring on the Wolf

2011-06-09T22:14:00.000-07:00

The past few weeks I've just been training for nationals. I think there must be a full moon coming or something because I just started to think about Teenwolf.

This will probably happen at my next race. Probably on the ramp before the TT. 5-4-3-2-1 and Hello Teenwolf!

Look how similar we look...

I'd also like to give a shout out to the celebrity appearance of FRANCIS in the Teenwolf video above. "Francis is busy! He's having his bath!"

Pee Wee vs Francis

Oh tee hee hoo hoo. I'm sure the 100 degree heat in a couple weeks in Georgia (where nationals is occurring) will wipe the silliness right off my face, right into the puddle of sweat below me.

Frankie Says Relax

2011-05-16T13:33:00.000-07:00

A lot can change in a month. I've learned so many lessons in the past month and my mood has been such an emotional roller coaster that I just wanted to wait until I was grounded before I posted again.

So here come the personal lessons. (Do you see a trend with this? First year of pro cycling, every post about lessons learned? Hmm...and to think I thought I knew everything...)

Lesson for the Month: Frankie Says Relax
This past month, I have podiumed three times. Each of the three times, I had a relaxed attitude going into the race, thinking, "Well, let's give this a go today, shall we?" Minimal expectations, little thought, just a "Here goes nothing" approach. Every time I bring a clean chamois in case of a potential podium, I don't race well. Every time I try to pump myself up and visualize my success, I don't do well. I do well when I relax and just go out there and have fun.

Let me tell you the stories of my podiums. Gather round.

1.Sea Otter Time Trial 3rd Place

That morning I had worked with the mechanic to try to fit my Shiv. We cut the bars and tried to get myself in a suitable position. I remember him riding by me and trying to evaluate my position. Then we saw a snake on the driveway (That's not relevant to the story. I just thought I would share.) Anyway, I was like BAH! We'll give a go. I pre-rode the TT course for my warm up and listened to some music and really just was feeling like what do I have to lose? Nothing. So I just held on tight and went for it. There were times flying down the the hills, especially before the sharp turn for the climb, that I was bouncing on the saddle thinking "Ohhhhh, F*****CK!" I wasn't quite used to the stiff carbon shifters and for the life of me could not shift into the small ring. I remember the course marshall waving at me frantically to try to indicate there was a left turn approaching. I think he might have been fearful for his life, as according to my Garmin at that point I was approaching 47mph. (I don't use K's yet. That's saved for 2nd year pros.) Anyway, I was pleased with my result and my first podium.

2. Sandy Springs Crit in Speedweek: 1st Place

This was a big one for me because it was my first NRC win. This one was the last of seven crits at speedweek and instead of being a designated workhorse, my director instructed us all to look for opportunities. I attacked a bit in the beginning of the race, but my legs were really feeling shitty that day. There was a little hill to the finish and I'd feel it each time up the 40 laps. I wondered why I was getting gapped after turns and realized that I was still overgeared. I tried more spinning (putting it into an even easier gear than I thought I needed, and I was FINALLY able to not lose ground). Anyway, after that, I just sat in patiently. I wasn't planning anything. I was just chilling and staying relaxed, watching people--especially the sneaky ones (You always have to know who the sneaky ones are...), evaluating moves--did I mention I was RELAXED? Anyway, then I saw a move go at two laps to go, and it felt almost like instinct when I made a move to bridge to it. I basically just rode as hard as I could for two laps and ended up with the win. I wish I could have been more relaxed to do the W salute instead of the one-hand fist pump, but well, whatever. I guess you can take the girl out of the derby (i.e., Arsenio Brawl+victorious jam=fist pump), but you can't take the derby out of the girl...

3. Tour de Grove: Dutchtown Classic: 3rd Place

So this was an epic day for me. The day before, Saturday, was a rainy crit. It was my second crit ever in the rain and well, after fishtailing, I was riding on the back for most of the race, scared and tense, praying that I would make it through without killing myself. It was horrible. It felt like I was starting over in racing--which was unfortunate because I had such a great race the day before. Anyway, so after checking four weather stations, watching the forecast by the hour, hoping it would be dry, my wishes were not granted and I had to race another rainy crit on Sunday, this one with downhills that led into turns. I had searched on the Internet for advice and texted friends, one who told me to HTFU, and realized I had no choice but to throw myself into the race because by golly, I wasn't going to be that kitten on the back again. I said, "Well, I'm going to be either crashed out or winning, but I will not be on the back again."
So, I went into the race with a F-it attitude, thinking it can't be worse than yesterday, here we go. After a lot of attacking, I ended up in a break with 2 of my teammates and 4 other girls. We had one of our top sprinters in our group, so it just made sense for my teammate Kendall (a.k.a. Ripper Ryan) and I to rotate on the front and kill it to make the break stick, protecting our sprinter. Because we had 3 riders in the break, we had a bit of obligation to drive the break. Anyway, I just put my head down and killed myself to make that break stick and get a gap on the peleton. We ended up with 1:10 on the bunch--with my teammates in the peleton killing any attempts to bridge to the group. I led my teammate up the finishing hill for the win and ended up rolling in for 3rd. I was like "Hot Damn! We won! And I'll be, I got 3rd. Cool."

So, lots of lessons learned on this day. 1) Don't underestimate yourself in the rain--or ever. If all these people can do it, so can you--well unless you're totally hopeless...it just might take you longer. 2)Relax. Don't brake. And push down real hard with your outside foot around those turns. 3).It kicks ass to work your ass off and pull out the win. I get as excited for my team winning as I do for myself winning, especially when I can contribute. It's a really cool feeling.

Oh and fyi, I didn't pack a clean chamois that day. There's nothing like standing on the podium in a soaking wet, dirty chamois in the rain...but I wouldn't know because we decided not to get pneumonia and go with pants.

Lessons in the Life of a Neo Pro

2011-04-14T22:59:00.000-07:00

Being on the road in my brand new lifestyle reminds me a lot of Josh Baskins (Tom Hanks) in the movie, Big. All of a sudden, I have opened a world of adventure, stress, excitement, and responsibilities. Here is a letter from Josh to his parents. It's funny how it parallels my life on the road now and role on the team.

"Dear Mom and Dad,
They said that I could write you and let you know I was okay. So far, they're treating me fine. I've got enough to eat and I'm perfectly safe. They say that I'll get out of here in about a month. In the mean time, it's a lot like camp! I watch TV and even get outside once in a while. I know you miss me. But try not to worry. I think this experience might even be good for me. I love you very much and I know that I'll see you soon."

Josh Baskins (Tom Hanks) after his transformation in Big

So, in case you haven't seen the movie and just continue to think I'm a weirdo, I'll highlight some differences. I've definitely gone from the "lead singer" on the local scene in racing to the sound check guy in a band. It's definitely a behind-the-scenes role but still an important one. I leave my ego at the door and look for opportunities to chase and kill, nab sprint or QOM points from other teams all for my GC leader or to make sure my sprinter isn't sprinting for 2nd or 3rd if there is a break down the road. My past few races have consisted of me doing my job for the first 3/4ths of the race and then blowing, watching the finish from afar. I think much of this is due to me still learning the ropes and/or doing my job well. I try not to look at the results behind the top few riders and when I do, I sort of keep one eye open, cringing as I scroll to page 2 or page 3 and see my name. Then I think, man if I could have just hung on, maybe I could have helped in the finish-- but we always think "what if" after the race, right?

It's funny how last year when I would ride these races, I would sit in and watch and wait, thinking well if I chase that I won't have any for the finish and now my first reaction is chase and kill, chase and kill--what's a finish? On a pro team, you sacrifice. You accept that other people have strengths and you pay your dues and work so that your team can reap the rewards. I learned that if you have a shitty day, you don't unload your frustrations with your individual performance on your team (you cry and boo hoo over the phone to your boyfriend on an isolated walk far far away from the team :)) You think of covering moves as a way to get stronger so that you can contribute more to the team later. Team sports. Wow. First, roller derby, now cycling. Maybe I should have played basketball as a child instead of running because it probably would have been a better parallel.
So, guess what? There is no "I" or even "Jennifer Wheeler" in team. Pshaw! I'm like an expert at "Words with Friends" (a.k.a Scrabble on my iPhone), and I couldn't find it.

But to be a better contributer, I just need to add a little more smarts to the mix--and some fitness (This week marks 8 weeks back on the bike after my 5 week sabbatical after my surgery! Woo hoo, upswing baby!). You know, smarts like attacking at the right time and from the right places, reading the race, chasing the right mix of people, etc. Perhaps all these things could keep me out of the corner in the dunce hat after the race.

But alas! Tomorrow is a new day and a new race. We will see. It's all new to me--and yes, I often wonder, um, why am I doing this again? Oh yes, because you don't want to miss an opportunity in life to see what might be. And when I try to figure out what to sell next to support myself or find the energy to fit in an hour or two of contract work at a stage race, I think, you do this why? Because you want to see your picture in Cycling News--no, because you should seize the day--no, because you like the cute outfits--no because you get to ride a pimp bike--no, because you don't want to miss an opportunity in life and say, I wonder what might have happened if...--hmm, yes, that's it.

In the meantime, check out these celebrity sightings!

A picture in VeloNews magazine

Protecting Sam (our sprinter) in Sunny King

Controlling the front in the fastest neutral of my life at Redlands

Getting my collar "popped" at the SRAM video shoot

People magazine's "Celebs are just like you" when they forget their sunglasses photo

Racing Life

2011-03-30T17:24:00.000-07:00

Last week was my first race at San Dimas with Tibco and first race on a pro team. It is all quite an experience and I'm still taking it all in. I often can't believe this is all happening, but I think I'm managing just fine. Here are things that are different now.

1. I have slept 12.5 hours in the past 20 hours. I have been super tired after my first 3-day stage race. I don't feel sick and my legs feel OK, but all I've wanted to do is sleep. But naps=Human Growth Hormone (HGH) production so every time I sleep, I feel like a Kindergartner again, waiting for the Sleeping Fairy to come along and sprinkle magical HGH on all the well-behaved children, sleeping during nap time.

Needlepoint courtesy of Park Avenue Needlepoint

2. I complete volunteer and sponsor work. Yesterday, we went to Kimberly Elementary School to talk about being a pro women's cyclist. It was so cute how the kids would ask questions like "Why are your clothes so tight?" "Why do you wear sunglasses?" We asked the kids how much they thought our bikes weighed. One kid guessed 100lbs, the next 150 pounds. I almost fell over imagining myself hauling a 150-pound bike up a hill.

Showcasing the Shiv and Amira

Today's sponsor event consisted of: "I'm Jennifer Whee...wait...I'm Jennifer Wheeler of Tibco...of Team Tibco...and I chose SCHRAM...no SRAM, yes SRAM. And cut!!!"

3. I have a job on the team. Before the races we'll discuss tactics and some strategies to get there. My job basically has been to cover attacks, take away points from other teams if we can't set our GC leader up, and to create breaks in hopes for a breakaway or counter attack. You know, standard bike stuff. What's different now though is that people are counting on me to do my job. For example, they can't expect the GC leader to chase an attack and then also go for a sprint. I need to make sure I'm up there to help. This was a bit difficult for me in the road race. I found myself not setting up for the climb and being in a bad position several times, which caused me to use so much energy to fight my way back up on the climb. I ended up getting popped right before the last lap after an attack. I spent the last lap working like hell to make sure I finished as close to the pack as possible--I couldn't get time cut. I was needed in the crit tomorrow. When shit happens, like a mechanical or a crash, you can't just quit or call it a day. People are counting on you. That's definitely a cool and motivating feeling.
Anyway, it turns out I did my job well the next day at the Criterium. I got a mention in Cycling News as a "notable aggressor," which was a really cool thing for me as a newbie.

Photo credit Jonathan Devich: http://reviews.roadbikereview.com/tag/san-dimas-stage-race

Photo Credit Jonathan Devich: http://www.cyclingnews.com/races/san-dimas-stage-race-ne-1/stage-3/results

4. You go back to the days of high school sleepovers. Pillow fight! No, not really--wastes too much energy. But you do end up sharing a room with several women and mingling with your friends post race. And just like in high school, we watch chick flicks and make jokes about how each other's mama's are so fat, etc. And I may have cried while watching The Proposal. But I may not have, too...We also complete "homework" assignments on the road. Several of the women on the team are in college, some have coaching businesses. We play computer lab in the morning and catch up with the world and complete "homework" assignments before and after racing. Luckily, I get paid for my homework assignments. I'm seeing just how lucky I am to have completed all my schooling and found a job to fall back on before all this cycling business.

Sam, Carlee, and I into the movie

Oh, Lauren, you don't say!

5. You get coaching scholarships. Carmichael Training Systems (CTS) has a scholarship program where they award a certain number of scholarships to "aspiring athletes." This includes testing, nutrition, etc. I applied and got one! I'm working with Jason Tullous who is based out of Tucson, so when I'm there periodically I can have some face time, etc. The big thing I'm doing is trusting the coaching and not adding or modifying as I see fit. That's new to me, but I hear that at some point you have to realize that you actually don't know everything--or in my case--barely anything and put your trust in someone who does. EEEEEEEEEEEEGADS! No, it's not hard for me at all...not at all.

6. You get homesick. I really miss Seattle. I've been in Tucson since December and home maybe a total of a week in a half. I miss my boyfriend, I miss my friends, I miss the trees and the green parks, and cool air, and Mt. Rainier, etc. I'm looking forward to my trip home after Sea Otter in April.

I'm sure this list will increase as the season progresses...stay tuned.

And after four takes...

2011-03-15T10:57:00.000-07:00

I finally said my name without stuttering. I was so excited and forgot my words. But regardless, it turned out to be an awesome video for an awesome bike fit experience.

I'll talk more about this experience in a bit. But in the meantime...

Supermodels

2011-03-12T16:12:00.000-08:00

Aren't we just gorgeous?

Photo Credit to Larry Rosa

Something to Share

2011-03-09T14:24:00.000-08:00

Is there something you'd like to share with the rest of us, Amazing Larry?

(Don't worry--I'm not missing my bike.) All I'll say is that my life often makes me feel like this:

Who Needs a Vespa if you can have a BERMAN?!!!

2011-03-05T20:56:00.000-08:00

I got me a Berman! But just for a few days.

A Berman

I'm excited because one of my friends is passing through town again and FINALLY I'm able to ride with him. You see, I, too, used to be a Berman. You might recognize my Bermanese from magazine covers such as 2011 Bicycle Paper Northwest Race Guide. (Hee hee, snort snort *blush *blush)

Wait did I say covers as in plural? This was my first...Ok. Ok. I was once on the front page of my family newsletter growing up (My sister and I would make newsletters to let my mother know the status of the household.), but I was the editor, too, and quoted myself so it really doesn't count.

Pulling that Clip Art Floppy

Anyway, back to the story of my Berman. So Berman had to do a 4-5 hour workout consisting of tempo, base, tempo and sprint intervals. So, it worked out well because I could sit on his wheel and still maintain my tempo pace. It was human moto-pacing! All was well in the world of Wheeler.

But then my Berman started to create chaos by re-routing the tempo down a 15-mile dirt road. I got to the dirt road and immediately put on my brakes when I saw a sign that said "Pavement Ends Ahead" and then "No Pavement for 50 miles." I said calmly, "Amelia doesn't ride on dirt. She's a lady."

But the Berman didn't want to hear this and began his escape.

Berman Escaping

And, of course, I will not be left out, so Amelia Roadhart and I sucked it up and began the trek. At first I was a bit overcautious as I had never ridden a road bike on gravel and bumps for so long. And during the first couple passes over the ruts and rumble strips, I swooned and said to Amelia, "Lawdy child! I do believe I have a spell of whiplash!" but not really--just a little drama practice.

But then we got the swing of it and I let go of the brakes, took pressure off the handlebars and followed the snaking tire track of the Berman ahead of me. After a few miles, we were flying, and Amelia Roadhart became Amelia "Dirt"hart for the day, and I had visions of me showing up to a cyclocross race or the X-Games on my Amira--because I'm sure they're all JUST LIKE THIS ROAD. I was in the zone. Bunny hopping and gaining a mad 3cm AT LEAST. I was very proud of my steed and my wheels and tires for taking the abuse. Not once did I think I was going to fall or worry about popping my tires. Thinking about falling=falling.

I guess you could say I was in the zone, until I pulled up to this carnage. Berman Down! Berman Down!

Carnage

I traded a tube for a modeling expose of Amelia "Dirt"hart and myself.

Hands on the Hips and Pop

Finally the Berman was fixed and then we proceeded to finish the final hour of intervals on the 5 hour 96 mile ride. Yep. It was an epic day.

One deserving steak with Christy and Berman. See video below.

"You know, my blood don't lie..."

2011-03-03T10:50:00.000-08:00

Enter Shakira....Exit Shakira (This is MY BLOG, DAMMIT!)

Anyway, the test was great. CTS put me on a stationary bike adjusted to my fit and then gradually increased the watts in 3 minute increments until there was a spike in the amount of lactic acid in my blood. So the routine went like this:

ME: Pedal, pedal, pedal and watching a screen to make sure my RPMs stayed at 90 (a number comfortable to me during the test).

CTS: Nod, nod, alcohol swab, wipe finger, PRICK (it didn't hurt but I still feel it deserves all caps.) Ask me my level of perceived exertion. I said...between gasps for air... "EASY, like a 1 on a scale of 20!" ...Then they added 5 or 6 to record an accurate number. (Sort of like when a short guy tells you he's 5'8" you assume he's actually 5'6".)

ME: Wait 60 seconds and then peek at the reading on the lactic measurer thingmabob. See it is still under 3.5 and think "HO YEAH!" like Peggy Hill!

Then this process continued until my measurements jumped from 2.1 to 3.7 to 5.1 to 8.7 in the span of 12 minutes. I made it further than I thought. And used the results to come to the conclusion that prior to surgery, I was a BEAST. Not like Christian the Lion beast but more like Simba during the fight scene with Scar in Lion King. Wait--did I really just make a Disney reference and expect people to be intimidated?

I'll come up with a better analogy after the next test when I'm asking where the gun show is--flex, flex, flex.

Talk later. Gotta work, then ride, then work. It's 80 here. I'm aiming for another euphoric sunset ending to my ride.

In the News

2011-03-01T08:07:00.000-08:00

It's been awhile since my last post. But just to update you quickly, here are a few highlights of my life in the past couple of weeks:

1. My life is awesome. I love my new Specialized bike, Amelia Roadhart. I see now that people who were riding $3500 bikes were at a severe disadvantage to those riding $7200 bikes. Seriously, it just exudes fast and I feel a difference in every component, every jump, etc. I feel fast on my training wheels! Perhaps because they're Reynolds and pimp, but still they're training wheels! I'm also getting used to SRAM. I feel like SRAM had created a cool persona with its different operating system. Is it like Apple versus Microsoft? Now I just "tap, tap that" to shift, but you know I'm always just single tapping because I NEVER shift into easier gears. Mash hard or go home!

2. Getting back in shape sucks big time. Lots of irritation after several hours on the bike. For example, "M-Fer! How much longer is this shitty road? Grrr... I'm in the middle of NOWHERE...nowhere...nowhere...and have hours and hours and watts and watts to go! AHHHH!" But then after a certain point, I'm thankful for sticking it out and think about putting training in the bank.

I have a LT test today--thank you Carmichael Training Systems (CTS). I like to say what happens in CTS stays at CTS...unless the results are really really good. I've never had a blood sampling test done so I guess i can't fake it till I make it. "These colors don't run!!!"...wait, I mean "The blood don't lie!!!!!!"

(I saw a Harley with a full size American flag suspended from the back of the bike the other day and thought "These colors don't run!" Oh and I'm back in Tucson for a few weeks because it decided to snow in Seattle. I need to have words with "it.")

What else? That's about it. Just cycling, putting in hours at MediaPro--thank you for letting me work remotely. I couldn't do this all without them. (If you're a corporate person reading and ever need elearning, you know who to call...)

Oh and I'm waiting for my fat suit to get loose so I can unzip it and step out. Apparently, when you go from doing nothing to full gas, your muscles eat up a bunch of water and your entire body looks like this for a few weeks while adjusting--well, that's what I'm telling myself.

"Jinny! Is that you in that fat costume? Well, git on outta there and get some dinner!" (Dinner is lunch, supper is dinner. Breakfast>Dinner>Supper. I learned that in high school when working in Kevil, Kentucky on a tobacco farm. "Come get you some dinner. We're having bologna sandwiches!" on Bunny Bread, of course.

Yep. That's about it. Random thoughts.

Is the Chicken Local?

2011-02-19T15:04:00.000-08:00

At team camp, we visited the Voler factory yesterday. The visit reminded me of this video:

See, the thing is that with Voler, the chicken is, in fact, local and free range and grass fed, etc. And if our kits had names, they'd be called Colin and they'd be well-liked among the other kits at the factory--just like in the video.

OK. So let me explain it outside of the metaphor for everyone not in Portlandia. The Voler factory is NOT like what you might think of when you think of a clothing factory. You might think sweat shop-like conditions with foremans and hard hats, billions of sewing machines, low wages, anonymous employees, stereotype, etc. But in fact it was nothing like that. And, yes, Voler is a sponsor, but a damn good sponsor with damn good business practices. So today I'm interrupting my blogging routine of monologues about food, surgeries, and Toddlers in Tiaras to write a prose sonnet, if you will, about Voler.

On our tour, we started in the design department, which was filled with samples of each jersey they've every produced--several Tibco jerseys as well. The Macs were lined up in a U-shape and there were the typical funny posters and trinkets you might find in a design room. They showed the intricacies put into creating a design that could fit a jersey from a size x-small an XX-large. Turns out I'm a small. I've never been a small. I love Voler--just like all the other gals who thought they were mediums in the world.

The print process

Then we moved to the print room, the cutting room, and the sewing room. It seemed they had about 50 employees tops in all the departments total. The president and vice president walked around and talked to the employees in Spanish, knew EVERYONE's names, and introduced us to the heads of the departments. Turns out most of the employees had worked at Voler for 10+ years, some even 20. They had incentive programs, benefits, bonuses, etc. Gerardo showed us how he sews chamois into each pair of shorts and how they sew their signature flat seams on their shorts. Another employee showed us zippers, and another elastic cuffs. They were so fast and efficient and smiling and making jokes. They liked their jobs, their coworkers, and were proud of their products. That was cool because as a half-time corporate world person who walks fast to appear busy--I understand the importance of morale in producing quality.

I mean, besides the Voler clothes being pimp--or really am I just pimp in those hot pink Rudy shades???? Could it be both?--what really stood out to me was the way they treat their employees and how everything was made in the Grover Beach location we were standing in--not shipped in from China or Taiwan. (Well, the chamois was made in Italy...)

My model pose

And how when you buy Voler clothes, you're supporting wholesome business practices, and quality control, and a company that acts like a team rather than a sweat shop.

But maybe I just have a crush on Gerardo. Seriously, you should have seen the love and care he put into each stitch, showing us how he makes sure every seam lines up and there isn't pull/stretch...sigh...I told him he should put labels in the shorts that said, "Sewn with love by Gerardo."

Gerardo sewing a flat seam

So, the point is that after taking my tour, next time I buy cycling clothing--just like with my chicken, I'll ask if it is local.

She Wore "Lemmon" ...

2011-02-16T07:04:00.000-08:00

I leave for Tibco team camp today. It's a 10-hour drive from Tucson so I'm breaking it up into two parts. I gotta say, although I'm excited about this huge step into the beginning of my cycing career--I mean, it's meet the team!!! Get your kit! Practice your killer secret sleuth team dynamics!--I'm also sad to be leaving Tucson. I met a lot of awesome people here and had a bunch of highs and lows as well.

Well, as part of my bid farewell, I rode up Mt. Lemmon as far as I wanted to. I made it 3 miles and decided that was enough. I mean, heck, today was the first day I could ride in the hoods without pain in my side. It was fun to be riding again, but my heart rate in the 80 degree weather was about 180 while pushing about 200 watts. I could still talk but it made me realize a few things: 1) My body was stressed. It was like WTF, Jennifer! I was liking our walks at 85bpm!!! 2) I used to be in f-ing great shape before this. 200 watts was something I could sustain for hours and hours and I didn't respect that before. (I swear, baby--come back to me and I'll treat you so good!) and 3) It's going to be a painful 6 weeks. Oh boy howdy.

It's really quite amazing how your body becomes accustomed to entering the pain cave on a daily basis and then when you take it away from that environment during injury or illness, it quickly learns the new way of resting and resists with all its might when you start dragging it back.

Word.

A Response on Food

2011-02-14T12:36:00.000-08:00

I received an email from a friend/reader who wanted to talk more about nutrition. The reader said since i've been body conscious since I was 9--it was more like 11--that maybe I could share some of my research/knowledge to drop a few lbs, so he wouldn't have to spend his working hours or free time looking into it. (Isn't that sort of like what a coach does? Hmmm...) The reader is already healthy and super fit and looks way young for their age, but has perhaps fallen into traps. But since I have no formal training in the subject at this point, and am not a doctor, I can only go off of what I've read and my experiences, so this is what I said.

Dear Reader,
Hi Caller--welcome to the program...and thanks for writing.... :)

First tip, don't eat three desserts at XXXXX* house. I'm watching you. (*XXXX=Anonymous location)

I feel like we're in AA meeting--more like an FA meeting-- Food Anonymous. Don't worry your secret dark passenger is safe with me... (I've been watching Dexter--OMG, I love that show. I stay up all night watching it online--not a good idea for weight loss. I know, Dexter? Get with the now! But can you believe the Ice Truck Killer was his brother?!! I cried. I miss the Ice Truck Killer.)
Ok. So I'm in the same boat you are about struggling with diet, but this clean eating approach seems to be the least taxing on the mind and make the most sense from a natural perspective. The more I read about it, the more interested I get. I guess I had a hunch about these things all along (like drinking beer, drinking diet coke, eating fake sugar and loads of desserts was bad) but when someone confirms it for me in a way that also incorporates health, performance, and hot body image, I tend to listen more.

What THEY say, is that nutrition makes up about 80% of your performance, whether you are an athlete, model, etc. (I like to think that then training equals another 70% for a total of 150% (who makes the rules for how large of a percentage you can have?) so eating well, and putting clean fuels in your body is like the difference between feeding a race horse a bunch of sugar cubes and little water versus whole grains, etc.

I think the problem is that we tend to make excuses for ourselves saying, what's one beer? What's two beers? I'll have a piece of cake, etc. etc. And then these excuses add up and it seems like every other day or every day we're putting some junk in our bodies. So how to stop that? For me, it's diving into the details to be convinced that everything you put into your body has consequence--some little, some big, some positive, some negative.
So instead of just avoiding the basics--saturated fat and high fructose corn syrup--and then eating more greens, etc.--easy--I've been researching more about the other stuff I put into my body on top of the good stuff. And I found a lot of my food has sugar in it. Almost everything else I eat besides the obvious fresh stuff. ANd i wouldn't be surprised if I just ate loads of candy, but I couldn't believe how everything has sugar in it. Look in your pantry. So next I wanted to know more about sugar and its effects on your body.
Everything I read talks about how sugar spikes insulin and raises cortisol levels (the stress hormone), and as an athlete cortisol equals SLOW. It talks about all the systems it taxes and you just gotta think that if your body is being taxed on a regular basis, it's probably not able to perform at its best. here's an article about it: http://www.healingdaily.com/detoxification-diet/sugar.htm --there are tons. I haven't completed my research. And i'm not a doctor. But this is an Food Anonymous meeting--we're not experts here. Just sharing our experiences. But any doctors should weigh in--like moseto.

I think about all the sugar we pump in while racing and training and wonder if there are healthier alternatives? Like juice with some natural electrolytes (I think these are salt and potassium concentrates or something), or raw bars (ingredients dates and nuts), and other things that pull from natural sugars. They say it's hard to avoid sugars, but choose some that are less refined or in their natural state--such as agave syrup, honey, maple syrup--all taken straight from the plant without processing, organic sugar in the raw if you need sugar.

With this in mind I started to look at the stuff in my cabinets that I like to eat mindlessly. gluten-free healthy granola, organic multi-grain cereal, bread, banana chips, etc. The second ingredient in the cereals was Evaporated Cane Juice. What? I thought these were healthy and organic? Sugar was even in the canned black beans from the store. It was in all the bread, everything. So what do I eat?

Well, a big part of this clean eating, is making your own food from scratch. Beans--instead of canned, buy the bagged dry beans and cook them in advance. Choose quinoa and brown rice over breads/pastas. Ezekiel sprouted bread made from barley and other grains that are less processed than refined flour. ANd fill up on apples. Tons of apples. I eat about 4 a day actually. The pectin creates a gel in your stomach and keeps you full.

But I knew this stuff--everyone knows this really. But the biggest difference is trying to combine a protein and carb in every meal. Lately, I've been having 3 meals and 3 snacks--maybe 4 snacks. I eat when I'm hungry or every few hours instead of grazing all day on cereal/snacks or having huge meals then fasting.

I haven't been thinking as much about the calories anymore because I know i'm putting good stuff in my body. It's relaxing. I look at the crappy food for what it is...crappy food. And honestly after reading all the negative reviews on stuff I didn't really think of as "harmful," it's less tempting to eat bad stuff. For example, I almost put creamy balsamic vinegar dressing on my salad, and then saw it had a slew of ingredients, including sugar (maybe High fructose corn syrup). Instead I put a dollop of organic plain yogurt (which has pectin in it) and some balsamic vinegar and an avocado to keep it moist. It was good.

But you also have to really plan ahead and have snacks available. I find if I know I'm going to eat in 2 or 3 hours I dont' ahve an urge to fill my plate so high because I know more food is coming. It's a nice feeling.

Here's an example of my meals yesterday. There are a lot more great "eating clean" type recipes. I just haven't had the time to get my grocery lists and make stuff--Dexter is really time consuming. You know how incorporating new recipes into a lifestyle can take time.

Breakfast:

Coffee
1 cup cooked 7 grain oats (Montana Bread Company)
1 cup plain fat free yogurt
1 apple chopped really small
cinnamon
a few almonds for crunch
Snack
Apple with peanut butter (the kind with only peanuts)

Lunch
Salad with veggies with avocado and nuts (would have liked chicken breast)
1/2 sprouted grain bagel w/peanut butter (carb+protein)

Snack
Energy Bar made with only dates and nuts

Dinner
Kale salad with pine nuts, feta, tomatoes, olive oil, red peppers
steak
baked sweet potato fries (cooked with salt/pepper and olive oil)
Snack
plain yogurt mixed with blueberries and an apple with some cinnamon

Anyway, we'll see how this goes. But I know just like with any change, it's going to be hard. I think it's just important to make a trend of eating clean. Also, check out this podcast that inspired me. Here's the podcast http://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/eat-clean-diet-podcasts-tosca/id286347543 I downloaded it for free on itunes and listened to it on a ride. If you can get past the "chick" stuff, she actually says stuff that is interesting. I'm not sure if I buy her theory on sugar clumping up in the body because sugar gets dumped into a vat of HCL, but Dr. Internet does confirm that sugar may be harmful. And people might say, oh only in large quantities! but if most everything you eat a day contains sugar, isn't that large quantities?

Drink water. Drink water. Drink 120oz a day! I've been doing to try to speed up my belly recovery, and it seems to help. And you probably drink too much beer. Just sayin'...
Hope that helps.

Sincerely Yours Forever,
Jennifer

Eating Clean

2011-02-12T06:48:00.000-08:00

In other news--I rode an hour yesterday continuously with minimal pain. Sweet!

Ok, back to the blog. A recent hobby of mine is finding and downloading free podcasts on iTunes. After I had listened to all the free This American Life's, Ricky Gervais, and dabbled in a few NPR podcasts, I started looking for some on diet and nutrition.

I already know a ton about nutrition--as I have a history of counting calories since 1995ish in high school--my poor brain. I know how many calories are in a pound, how many calories are in a gram of fat, protein, carbs, etc. I have read almost every book about metabolism and every other pitch out there. Even with all that, I have still always been attracted to the eat clean angle. Perhaps because it is pure and it's really how you're supposed to eat. Plus, every time I drink a diet coke, I have a feeling a guilt like I KNOW this is not good for me. (I don't feel that way when I eat cake though--chaw chaw chaw--so bring on the Valentine's CAKE!) Maybe I feel that way because diet coke burns going down your throat if you haven't had one in a while? But it's so good. I'll go to a bar and order a diet coke--it's like going on a binger. "Awww man, I had 8 diet cokes tonight. I'm wasted! PARTY!" Everyone thinks I'm drunk anyway, so it's not like I'm just sitting in the corner sipping my diet coke and wishing I was at home watching Dexter--my newest fling. I'm cheers-ing with my diet coke! Yeah! Next round of sodas are on me!

Anyway, I digress. End diet coke fantasy.

So I ran across this Tosca Reno podcast about how she was 40 and took on a challenge from Robert Kennedy (he owns Oxygen magazine and other fitness mags)--part of it was eating clean. I had seen her before in some fitness magazines, but I liked reading about her because she's over 40 and so I thought about my mom and her struggles to stay fit. I mean, she was the one who got me into sports in the first place. She used to drop me on 3 mile runs and I would cry and say, "You're trying to beat me on purpose!" Then the next summer I'd drop her and she would cry and say, "Jenny, why do you always have to go fast?!" Maybe in an upcoming blog I'll write about how I thought it would be a good idea to ride rental mountain bikes up Haleakala and after a few miles she cussed at me so loudly that the families in the rental vans would rubberneck as they drove by. I would push her just enough where she was cussing BUT still riding. A few minutes more and she would have thrown her bike off the side of the volcano.

Anyway, I digress again... the eat clean principles are:

Eat 6 meals a day--I already do this. Does cake count as a meal though?
Drink at least 2 liters of water a day--I already do this.
Cut out all processed foods, including sugar--Diet Coke doesn't have sugar....what? Wait...do you think it's processed?!!!??!!!
Mix complex carb with lean protein in every meal--Not a new principle for me. I just don't do it.
Buy a bunch of Clean Eating books--Don't need to! I have then Intertrons! Mwahahaha. There are tons of eating clean blogs.

So, will I be doing this? Can I cut out diet coke? Should I cut out diet coke? Is restriction good for my personality? No. But even so, I can make changes and see how it goes.

Speaking of clean eating, here is a muffin recipe. People have been asking for it cause the muffins are good for snacks on the bike. I originally got it from http://enlightenedcooking.blogspot.com/ and I modified it to fit the needs of a vegan-tarian way back when and have kept the changes cause it's better. OH but it has sugar and stuff and doesn't really follow the rules. But I guess writing it down doesn't mean I'm eating it.

Green Muffins That Taste Good

1 and 1/4 cups wheat bran (I use Bob’s Red Mill Miller's Wheat Bran)
1 and 1/4 cups white whole wheat flour (I use King Arthur brand)
2 tablespoons ground flaxseed (flaxseed meal)
1 and 1/2 teaspoons baking soda
1 and 1/2 teaspoons ground cinnamon
1 teaspoon baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
2/3 cup packed dark brown sugar
2/3 cup dried blueberries (or dried cherries or cranberries or raisins)
Chocolate CHIPS!!! As many as you'd like.
1 tablespoon roasted walnut oil OR some type of oil
1 and 1/3 cups unsweetened applesauce
1 or 2 large very ripe banana, peeled and broken apart
2-3 heaping handfuls of fresh spinach (I use pre-washed bagged spinach leaves)

Preheat oven to 400°F. Line the cups of a standard 12-cup muffin tin with paper liners, or spray with nonstick cooking spray.

In a large bowl, whisk the bran, flour, flaxseed meal, baking powder, baking soda, cinnamon, salt, and brown sugar until blended; stir in the dried fruit, nuts, and chocolate chips.
Place the oil, applesauce , banana, and chopped spinach into the blender. Blend at medium speed until smooth, then pour over the dry ingredients. Stir gently just until moistened.

Spoon the batter into the prepared cups. Bake for about 18-20 minutes until just set. Cool. Makes 12 muffins.

Skillz

2011-02-09T10:00:00.000-08:00

I am taking on the schedule of 30 minutes in the morning, 30 minutes in the evening (abort if there is pain). So this sunny morning, I went for my first ride. Since it feels most comfortable the higher my body, I've decided to think of this setback as an OPPORTUNITY to work on my mad hands-free skillz. I can do most of the 30 minutes without hands! Pro! I can even pedal around corners hands free!

I'm so pro, it's sick! Boo yah!

Oh and I've moved on from the Lilith Fair to Junior Boys:

Music

2011-02-08T18:41:00.000-08:00

All was on the upswing...until it wasn't.

I walked 14 miles, one day, rode 30 minutes another, etc. etc. I was positive and just kept working at it. The Ricky Gervais podcasts helped. Brilliant! Amasing! as he might say. I also read the first chapters of several books on Amazon--read the first chapter for free!

(Oh and speaking of products, Google cancelled my advertising campaign. Apparently, there have been invalid clicks. There's no detail--just form letters. Ok. So now you'll just have to come to my blog for the great posts rather than the GREAT ads. But really, how many times can you read about hernia repairs when all we really wanted were ads about Pajama Jeans and Tajazzles.)

So, on Saturday the process continued and I hiked 7 miles (roundtrip) to bring a bottle of tequilla to the Tequilla Tree at Single Speed Arizona--all the while enjoying my podcasts. Then I went home and went for a ride with my roommate. We spun easy and I felt good so I decided to commit to a loop. Bad idea. After 49 minutes exactly I started to have pain--like worse than I had had. So, I just sat up and rode home as slow as I could. It ended up being a little over an hour and 20 miles. More than I had gone. It felt so good before that. I was euphoric! I didn't do anything crazy and my watts stayed low and my hands up high, etc.

Since then my stomach has hurt when I sit. But it's more pain in my back. I'm worried that all this pain in the left might actually be my kidneys so I've been drinking a ton of water...starting today.

Anyway, since then I've also had really really low moments--you know the crying, the curling up in bed, hating the bike, wanting to quit it all so I didn't have any pressure to heal. I wanted to go back to my other job, I wanted to take the safe route, and quit trying to accomplish tasks of such epic proportion. I was tired of having to call Regence every day to see if my application had been processed after 45 days. I was tired of waking up with a new pain and wondering what I'll have to deal with next. Depressed about watching my body become soft as if all my hard work was just disappearing a day at a time. My mood was up, down, up, down, and honestly, I hadn't felt so depressed in so long. This huge opportunity for me, one that I had earned and worked hard for, just taken. it felt unfair and hopeless. Dramatic? Sure. But it's how I felt. I was just tired of being strong.

But today, after having a terrible day with bad pain in my back, internet researching, water drinking, etc. and general fatigue, I decided to get up and go on a spin. And during the 37-minute sunset spin, I listened to some music that reminded me of 1996 when I was in Kentucky training for my junior year of my high school running career. I trained harder that summer than I had ever trained. Running 50+ miles a week on hills, watching my diet (probably obsessively since I didn't eat anything past 4:00 p.m. and did hours of step aerobics in the evening if I did). I worked on a tobacco farm with my brother during the day and then would come home exhausted but still go run into the sunset because I was determined.

Everything I did that summer was about trying to be a better runner. I felt like deep inside I knew I could do it. Before that summer I was the 5th or 6th runner on the varsity squad and I was determined to be the best possible. All the sacrifice and workouts, which seemed huge to me at the time, paid off. I had a breakthrough and was the best runner on the team that year. I made it to state and placed in the top 20. I medaled in the mile in track at state and qualified for three events. That was a huge deal to me because our state was all divisions so it was the cream of the crop of Indiana. After that summer I got calls from colleges, Brown, Purdue, IU, and Eastern Kentucky where I ended up going because of the scholarship opportunities.

Anyway, when I trained in the summer of '96, I remember listening to Sarah McLachlan's "Fumbling towards Ecstasy" album over and over and over again. So, on my sunset ride tonight, when I listened to songs from that album today (I had one of the songs in my head for some reason), it brought me back to that summer. I felt an overwhelming sense of strength and release on the ride as I was just flopping over the pedals. I thought about why all of this was impacting me so much when after all it was just bicycling. But I realized that it's the process of all of it that feels so impactful. It's the process of sacrificing so much to chase something with an unknown outcome. It's the discipline and drive that goes into every day where you make hundreds of decisions to try to improve yourself, never letting yourself say, I think I'll just sit around today and maybe tomorrow. Or maybe I'll take up that offer to go camping for a few days. Every conscious action revolves around your ultimate goal without rest. And when you do rest, it is planned and an intentional part of improvement.

So when your life is consumed by this fight for something big, when the process is delayed, or taken away, the feeling of hopelessness and loss is HUGE. And that's why I feel so terrible and i can't say, well it's "just cycling" because I have made it who I am, so that's like saying, well it's just my life.

And that's why for the past couple of days, defeat has been creeping in. I have been snubbing the bike, saying what's the point--it only brings me pain. Woopie. I get to flop at 70 watts for a few minutes. Blech, take me to my safe place. My boyfriend said my bike situation was like if I were a commercial farmer who was limited to growing a lima bean science project in a pot on a kitchen counter.

But today on the bike, I felt better mentally. The music took me back to my place of strength and I felt motivated in that instant to keep pressing, feel the process, and find the mental toughness to pick myself up again--even if I am suffocating in my girdle as I type this. I think every day, I have to just look to find this place and keep having the hope that it will pass. You can say that it will pass, but when you get knocked down enough with problem after problem, it's easy to let that hopelessness creep in. I realized that this is all part of that other side of training of great athletes--the one about taking a beating and getting up again, pushing through a different type of pain.

I'll end with my favorite pep talk. It nailed my feelings and I felt comforted, so I want to thank my friend for this:

"I'm sorry this is so hard on you. I know how hard you have been working towards it, how much has been put aside and/or sacrificed for cycling. To have this setback has got to feel like that sacrifice was wasted, and that has got to feel beyond shitty. The only comfort I can offer is that it is a setback from your goals, not a nullification of your efforts. You will achieve your goals, it will just take longer than you wanted. Doesn't it always?"

And here were my 1996 favorites. Yes, I'm admitting that I listened to Sarah McLachlan. I know I'm supposed to be all cool and stuff--well, at least in my mind--but now you know why these songs hold a dear place in my heart.

Portlandia

2011-02-03T13:16:00.000-08:00

In between my walks and work, I've discovered a new show called Portlandia.

I can't get this song out of my head..."The Dream of the 90s is Aliiiive"

Walking and Eating and Eating and Eating Some More

2011-02-01T11:17:00.000-08:00

I had a small breakthrough the other day when I could ride my bicycle, hold the bars, and experience no pain for 10 minutes. Albeit I had a strong tailwind--I realized this when I turned around--it was still an awesome moment. Soon after my euphoria quickly disappeared when I started to feel stiffness and twinges of pain in my lower left gut.

This has been a pattern for the last couple days. I can go a few more minutes but honestly, I don't want to push it. What's the point of completing 20 minutes versus 22 minutes in recovery zone, especially if there's a chance that I'll hurt myself.

So instead I've taken up walking. My speed is about 3.2 miles/hour. Today I walked 5 miles--totally comfortable, no stiffness, no pain. I'll still dabble on the bike just to keep my legs moving and because I like wearing Lycra...

I think that if I didn't have so many HUGE things coming up for me--like the beginning of my FIRST season as a professional cyclist--I wouldn't worry about not being able to ride the bike. But right now I have to put those mainly self-imposed pressures aside, I have to realign my goals, and not dwell on how good of shape I was in before this surgery.

When I look at my severely swollen belly and wince in pain as the muscles stretch to accommodate all the fluid, the thought creeps in "Maybe I shouldn't have had this surgery right now..." I've really been working on not giving these thoughts my energy, as it's completely pointless to worry about what's going to happen next week or what happened in the past. But damn, it's still really hard, and although I'm generally pretty positive, I want to be honest and admit that I have really tough moments, too. For me the tough moments are usually followed by moments after I've just eaten dinner and then soon after eat seven Girl Scout Samoas and a half a bar of chocolate and wonder what I might eat next.

Yep, with all the required down time, my past eating problems are creeping in as well. The ones where food consumes my thoughts and I wake up and start calculating what I'm going eat all day. Exercise usually helps with this--I eat to fuel my body. I eat when I'm not hungry to prepare my body for a ride, etc. I pay little attention to the thoughts that I might be eating too much when I burn 3000 calories a day. I eat based on a plan to fuel myself not based on my hunger because often I'm not hungry until 3 days later and at that time I haven't given my body enough protein to rebuild my muscles, so how can I trust that it knows what it wants, especially when I'm making it perform in ways that aren't natural? Um, I really don't think our bodies were designed to exercise 25 hours a week and or digest 4-5,000 calories daily. Maybe I'm wrong, but I remember some scientific study about if you want to live longer, eat less to preserve your systems. I think it's sort of like if you exercise regularly, you end up building the strength of your heart so that it only needs to pump 40 beats per minute. It seems it would break down faster if it was constantly required to pump 80 beats per minute. But like I said, I'm no doctor. These are just musings.

Anyway, now that my primary exercise is walking, my food obsessions have arisen once again, but this time, I'm taking some time to figure it out at a deeper level. I've come a long way since high school and college when I either puked or ran 10 miles in the middle of the night with my precious but also enabling roommate to compensate for my overeating or negative body image. I'm so FAR from that time and that feels really good. But I still have issues, as do many many many many athletes and non-athletes. You really don't have to be starving or puking or putting yourself in danger to have food compulsions or obsessions. But oh wouldn't it be nice to be one of those people that without even thinking about it, 90% of the time just eats till satisfaction? How freeing would that be?

Of course, I know where my obsessions stem from, but that doesn't solve my problems. My coach recommended some good books about getting to the root of compulsive eating behavior--Geneen Roth's books--one which is called "Breaking Free from Compulsive Eating." It's really interesting because it talks a lot about trusting your body. She gave some examples about looking at your watch to see if it's time to eat (I do that.) or eating at specific times during the day instead of just waiting until you're hungry. Or feeling disappointed if you miss a meal. (It feels like either an accomplishment or gives me anxiety if I miss a meal.) Anyway, the point is that really, these food thoughts shouldn't consume me so much. I'm trying to learn how to eat until satisfaction rather than eating until I've filled an emotional void, until I find something better to do, or until I've reached my caloric goal.

It's a process, just like anything else. We'll see where it takes me.

Toddler and Tiaras

2011-01-28T21:06:00.000-08:00

It's on Netflix, Watch Instantly. I found myself rooting for Kaleigh (pronounced Kay-lee) for the Grand Supreme in the Little Miss Georgia pageant.

Seriously, what's the matter with me?