Online Dating Rejects

Speaks for itself.

2015-08-26T07:33:00.001-04:00

Some good emails...

2015-08-23T16:20:00.000-04:00

Hookers and Blow

2015-08-23T16:16:00.000-04:00

So this guy emailed me. He thinks I'm hilarious, and then emailed me again after I viewed his wonderful profile to tell me "thanks for looking".

Jesus and Kids

2012-11-28T13:46:00.000-05:00

So this guy contacts me on PoF. Keep in mind a few things: 1) we live 2 hours away 2) I clearly state I don't want kids and 3) I clearly state I'm not religious.

These are some snippets in emails I received from him:

First - and this is just paraphrasing - he asked me right off the bat if I would reconsider the having kids things. WTF? Who asks someone that clearly doesn't want kids if they would reconsider, in a 2nd email reply? Ok...

He apparently Loves Teh Gays:

Also had 2 aunts and a sister who is Gay, though I love them with all my heart, they knew and I knew it was wrong, and even though it was their choice, they knew God didn't make them that way and they would be judged for it. And though I don't agree, and never will, I don't hate them for it. And ask them to come to church with me all the time ;-)

And he's a bit religious. Preach on, preacher!

Well, know this, the only thing we on Earth know about Heaven, Hell, and God Almighty, are written in those 66 books of the Bible. Funny how it's one 6 short, huh? And if your heart ponders these things even in the slightest Ms X, you need to settle it while your ticker, is, well, STILL TICKING!! Because according to the Good Book, it's too late when that happens. CHOP CHOP!! LOL!! ;-)

Triangle of Truth

2010-12-16T09:55:00.001-05:00

Some new ones

2010-08-24T14:24:00.002-04:00

Of course there's lots of fish in the sea, but you're the only one I'd love to catch and mount back at my place. hi im jose ;)

-----

Good Evening,

I hope you are doing well on this lovely Monday evening, here it
is approaching 10:30 pm and have to admit I am quite intrigued and
interested after reading your ad, and I have to admit and be
honest, I figured here is an intelligent lady someone that can actually
make a clear concise sentence, so she must have a head on her
shoulder and not use it only as a hat rack!!! I do have a warped
sense of humor might be all those years I was confined in
something long black and full of seamen, aka nuclear powered
submarine!!! LOL. what you thought I was saying something else!!!
So let me introduce myself, my name is David, and to tell you I am
Jewish!!! I have not been a practicing one for some time, but I do
follow the holidays, it can be a part hard when I spent nearly half my
life in the US Navy and served primarily on fast attack submarines.
Yes, one of those, retired Navy Chief, nuclear trained, so I am one of
those engineering types, and right now, I am residing in Columbia,
MD and work in Union Bridge, MD at the LeHigh Cement plant there,
I am one of their industrial electrician,and I am new to this area
too!!! Earlier last year I was working in Bakersfield, California and
moved here in May 2009, and I purchased a three bedroom condo
here, and yes, that is a long story I would be happy to tell later, that
can be a nice talk!!! Oh, I forget to continue about myself, I am now
50 years old, damned cannot believe I made it to 50 and tall, if
you think 6'3" is tall!!!! I have a close trimmed red beard, okay it has
more white in it now, damned approaching half a century but still
going strong. I am not a smoker anymore, I stopped cold turkey on
July 1, 2000, so it has been some time for a puff, and decided to
stop smoking the same day I was served divorce papers from
my ex wife, figured if I was going to get rid of one bad habit might ask
well make it two and get rid of the ex!!! Remember I did warn you
about my sense of humor!!! Yes, I am divorced and my divorce was
finalized back in March 2003 and I have two sons, 23 and 22 and
they are on their own, finished with college and living in Connecticut.
I am originally from Connecticut and a few days after my graduation
from high school, I left for the navy and did not return to live in CT
until I retired 22 years later from the Navy!!! And then during my
divorce I was a road warrior, doing field service work on industrial
boilers and burners and more!!!! So i am dependable and caring
man, and I did not run away from my responsibilities during
my divorce, so we all have a little bit of baggage but I am looking for
someone to cuddle up next to at night, someone I can share my
body heat and let just see what else we can figure out together,
someone to be part of my life, are you willing to find out more? And
yes, I love to kiss too, and snuggling on the sofa as we watch a DVD
together!!! And can always try to erase those bad memories and give
you some new and enjoyable ones!!

So let see here it is getting ready to head off to bed, but I found your ad
and wanted to say hello. And thinking and believing that a nice quiet
romantic evening while sharing a nice meal and a bottle of wine, enjoying
both the food and company is perfect, as we talk and get to know each
other. So I know quite a few places I love to see and traveling all my
years in the Navy I have seen the world, but I do enjoy cruising, a lot
different on a cruise ship instead of a submarine, LOL, do you just need
a passport and we can see the Caribbean for starters!!! And then during
the cruise, we can enjoy being together, sharing meals, enjoying a few
drinks at a nice bar listening to music, not too loud we have to be able to talk!!!

So let me keep this short now, and hopefully I will hear back from
you!!!

David

The latest received...it's a novel!

2010-08-20T10:05:00.000-04:00

It's been along week at work, and you're hoping for a nice, quiet Friday night and Saturday. Your first impulse is to go straight home after work and spend the entire free time sound asleep. But, your co-workers are going to happy hour at the bar in the DoubleTree hotel around the corner. Free cocktails until 7:00! Just pretend you're a guest. They do it all the time. You have a glass of wine, then another as you and your friends unload some stress and make fun of that self-important guy who's always telling everyone how to do everything a little better. After a few hours, a couple people leave, then another and another and next thing you know, it's just you. You were just starting to feel good and energized, a little buzzed, and everyone disappeared. You should probably wait a while before you drive home, so you move to one of the lounge chairs, take out your paperback book and read while rubbing your aching neck.

I've been sitting in the lounge area, reading myself, having a few cocktails and watching you. Watching you laugh and relax and interact with your friends. Watching your eyes light up as your evening seemed to be beginning, then seeing your mood deflate as they each went their own way. I bring you another glass of wine and try to start up a conversation. You're trying to get more sober, not more drunk, so you politely accept it with no plans of actually drinking it. We make small talk for a few minutes and I can sense you're not in the mood. A bunch of people come in, loud and drunk and sit all around us. "Let's go over there- it's quiet, we can both read in peace" I suggest, pointing to a set of chairs across the lobby.

We take our drinks and books and head over to the comfortable couches. We chat a little, and read and drink. There are long silences, but not awkward ones. I excuse myself for a minute while you're buried in your book. I come back a few minutes later and set two more drinks on the coffee table. You say thank you, but you have no plans of even touching that one. Rather than sit back down, I come up behind you and put my hands on your neck. You're startled, and a little freaked out by a total stranger with his hands on your neck. "You've been working on your neck the whole time you've been here. I thought you could use some help". It's a public space, there are people around, so you relax a little. You really do need it. I work the back of your neck, on either side of your spine, and up into your hairline at the base of your skull. I've had a few classes, so I know how this works. First some gently rubbing to get your blood flow going, then slow, deep pressure on the muscles and tendons, along the edge of the bones. I go forward to just behind your ears, pressing hard with my fingertips, then down your neck to your shoulders. You close your eyes and lean back a little as I work the outside of your shoulders and your shoulder blades, where the tension has built up. It's nice to have big strong hands doing this for you. You reach forward for your glass of wine. That makes me smile. I am good, but I am also bad, and you have just extended your stay for another hour or more.

You don't say much, you're just enjoying the soft music, the wine and the massage. I work my way back to your shoulders, then all the way down each arm. Slowly rubbing, stretching, finding the pressure points. I get to your hands, which feel small in mine. I turn them over, rub your palms deeply, and tug at each finger. You're completely relaxed, enjoying this unexpected massage from a total stranger, a world away from your typical friday evening. "This is a weird time to ask, but what's your name?" "Tom. what's your's?" "Sheri" "Well Sheri, it's very nice to meet you. I have a phone call I have to take so I'm going somewhere quiet for a while. I'll be half an hour. This here is a key to room 916. I hope to find you there, in bed, panties only in a little bit." I take my phone out, looking at it as I walk around the corner.

You can't believe you're doing this. No, you're not going to. Maybe. What the fuck? Maybe the answer is another drink. Hmmm....Another drink. A few sips in, and you realize every drink not only makes you have to stay longer before you can drive, but loosens you up and makes it more likely. When was the last time you did something totally crazy? Fuck it. You're gonna go. Stop thinking about it, and just do it. Another drink, just to be sure and you head up. Nervously you unlock the door and step in. You look around and everything seems normal. A quick stop in the bathroom to freshen up, and you're committed. You go into the bedroom, shut the door, undress down to your panties and slip under the covers. You lie there, heart racing, wondering if this is smart? What if he's a pyscho? What am I doing here? You think it's all wrong and decide to leave. But just then you hear my key in the door, and it's too late.

Rather than come in the bedroom, I head straight for the shower. I have no idea if you're waiting for me in bed or not. I didn't see you in the lobby, but you might have, probably did, leave. Oh well. But just the chance that you're there is exciting. I get out of the shower, towel off and brush my teeth. I wrap the towel around my waist, but you it does little to hide my rock-hard cock. God, I hope she's there...

I open the door and see you in bed, covers pulled up to your neck. You say "Hey. I'm here. Not sure I should be, but I am" I smile. "I'm not so sure either, but let's try to figure that out." I walk over to the bed, climb on and straddle you. I lean down to kiss you. A light, dry kiss on your beautiful, full lips. You kiss back, and your tongue slips into my mouth, flicking mine. I hold your face gently and kiss you again. Your hands go to my back and pull me toward you. You feel so good. I kiss your chin, and slowly down your neck. My hand brushes down the thin sheet. I can see your hard nipples pressing against them. I resist the urge to pull the sheet down and instead rub over them lightly with my fingers through the soft fabric. You let out a little moan and press up towards me. I move down a little kiss your breast through the sheet. I lick your nipple. I bite it lightly. Mmmmm....I must see....I pull the covers down, exposing your whole body. You squirm around slowly while I admire it and think of the fun we're about to have.

I kiss you again, then gently bite your earlobe and start from there a long, slow trail with my tongue. Down your neck...out to your shoulder...down the outside of your chest, around your beast, down to your stomach. I kiss your belly, then start up with my tongue. I love to feel the weight of your breast from below. I tease it, licking and kissing all around it, in slightly smaller circles, then look up at you as i flick your nipple with my tongue. Mmmmm. I lick and suck it. I kiss it. I suck your hard nipple into my mouth, biting it with my lips while rolling my tongue all around it. I slowly bring my hand up to the other one and squeeze it while using my mouth on this one. I take your other nipple between my thumb and forefinger and roll it around. You make the cutest little hot-girl-needs-to-be-fucked noises. You loosen my towel and it falls to the bed. My cock is hard and throbbing. I stand up and bring it up to your mouth. You have me so hot, pre-cum is already leaking all over it. I slide just the tip between your lips. I feel your tongue flick at it. I pull it back and you make a pouty sad face. "Not now. There will be plenty of time for that later." This first part is going to be about you.

I flip you over. Yum. The way your ass fills your panties is just spectacular. I start down at your feet, rubbing the bottom of them, making you feel even more relaxed. I work up slowly, spending a lot of time on your calves, massaging them deeply with my strong hands. You start to feel like a toy in my hands. We both kind of like it. I move up to work on your hamstrings, and part your legs just a bit. I run my hands slowly up them, over your ass, and give each cheek at rub down. I flip you back over, straddle you again and kiss your belly. I move down ever so slowly, kissing and licking. I can see the wetness showing through your panties. Mmmmm. i want some sooo badly. So very badly. I use my finger to lightly trace the edge of your panties. I rub your lips through them and you start to grind into my finger a little.

I bring my mouth down and give you a long, slow deliberate lick, parting your pussy a bit through the sheer fabric. I can feel the warmth and get a little taste. I want more. I grab the top of your panties with my teeth and left them up. I look up at you but your eyes are closed. "Watch. It turns me on when you watch", I say. I start to pull them down and I finally get to see your beautiful pussy. Your neatly trimmed bush. Your clit dying to be touched. I sit up and roughly pull them all the way down, and toss them aside. I bring my cock back up to your mouth and try to slip it in. You lick the head once, then purse your lips, shake your head no and give me a sly, sexy smile.

I go back down between your legs. You smell so good. I can't wait any longer to taste you. I remind you to watch and I put my mouth on your pussy, just below your clit. I kiss you and flick my tongue just a little, then another long, slow, deep lick that parts your lips and finishes on your clit. I kiss and lick your lips...one side, then the other, always from bottom to top so I can finish with my tongue on your clit. I spread your lips with my fingers, completely exposing your clit. I kiss it. I flick it with the tip of my tongue and nibble it with my lips. I use the wide, flat part of my tongue to lick in every direction as my hands slip under your butt so I can pull you closer to my mouth. You're so wet. You taste so sweet. You look down between your legs and see the muscles from my broad shoulders supporting my weight and my mouth on your pussy. I start sliding my tongue inside you and move my hands up to your breasts. I cup them and squeeze them gently, sensing their weight while my tongue slides in and out of your dripping wet pussy. I sit up for a minute and admire the scene. You are so beautiful, so exposed, so vulnerable naked on the bed, legs bent at the knees and spread, your delicious wet pussy begging for attention.

I move up to play with your titties some more. You grab them and squeeze them for me while I lick and suck at your hard nipples. You reach down between my legs and grab my throbbing cock, guiding it toward your pussy. Mmmm I want to be inside you so very badly. I press it up against you. I grab my cock with my hand and rub the head on your clit. I slap it lightly on your clit over and over. I use the head to slice your lips apart and slip just the tip inside you. Mmmmmm. You're so tight, but so wet and warm that I could so easily slide deep inside you. Instead I pull out and go back to kissing your belly. You nudge my face down and thrust up toward me. Your hot pussy is begging for attention, for something to be inside it...cock, finger, tongue, anything. I kiss and lick your inner thighs, coming oh-so close to where you want my tongue. I go to kiss your clit but stop just short and blow on it. I gently stroke your lips while blowing on your clit and every once in a while letting my tongue have a quick flick, a small taste.

I slide a finger deep inside you. I like to watch it slowly going in, then out. I pull it out a lick it. You really are delicious. I spread you lips with my fingers again and go back to sucking and licking your clit, while gently fingering you. Your moaning and thrusting is really making me want to cum. I want to fuck you hard and fast, but first I was to hear you cum, feel you shudder. So I keep sucking your clit, flicking it with my tongue and fingering you with two fingers. I drive them deep inside you and twist them, exploring you with my mouth and fingers while you hold my head in place between your legs. You thrust harder and faster and I keep licking until you scream in ecstasy and push my face away.

I crawl up next to you and spoon you for a few minutes while you recover. You're spent, but my cock is still throbbing and aching for some attention. I gently roll you over again onto your stomach and I stand by the edge of the bed. I bring my cock up to your mouth again, and you open for it. Your mouth feels so good, so wet on my cock. I watch you kiss and suck me, and I keep staring at your naked ass, you legs spread just a little. I want more of your pussy. I pull out of your mouth and you give me a sexy pout. I position myself at the bottom of the bed and start kissing up your leg again. As I get up above your knees, I spread them even further. Mmmmm. I can see your beautiful pussy, still red and swollen. That's what I want. I spread your cheeks and life your ass up in the air. You lean into my face as I kiss and lick your pussy, still dripping wet. I grab your hips and pull you into my face. So fucking hot, bent over, ass in the air for me to devour.

I love being behind you, the feeling of power and control. I tell you to play with your tits for me. I pull back to watch. You are so hot. So ripe to be fucked, bent over, on your elbows, pinching your nipples and grinding your wet, exposed pussy. I climb on the bed an bring my cock up between your legs. You lean back and take me all the way in. All the way. In, then out. I thrust deep inside you and hold you still. I pull out slowly. It's so hot to watch. My cock slowly slides out, glistening with you. I lie next to you and stroke my cock a few times for you, then guide your head toward it. I lift your leg so you can settle your pussy over my mouth while you take me in yours.

You lower your pussy to where I can tongue you and you take my cock in both hands. I thrust my hips as you kiss and lick me. It feels so good, I could cum any second. I thrust harder and faster and you basically just open your mouth for it. I fuck your mouth as you occasionally kiss the head and lick me. I feel an orgasm build. I open my eyes and see your pussy right in front of me. I want to lick you, but I can barely move except to try to stay in your mouth. I see and feel your hard nipples dragging along my stomach and that sends me over the top. I let out a moan as I cum. A spurt in your mouth, then you pull me out and use your hands. I cum for what seems like a full minute, all down your neck, your shoulders, between your titties. We both lie there in bed, exhausted and in disbelief over what we did...

Something from the ladies...

2010-04-29T08:12:00.001-04:00

Hello My Name Is brenda louis,I am new to this online relationship
seeking,How are u doing,Do you know that men and women are angels
created with only one wing? And they need to embrace each other to
be able to fly... I Hope to find my angel whom i can fly with
forever. Went through your profile caught my eye,Ur Picx really
look so great and good looking,I will like to get to know more
about u will like to know what u looking for in a relationship,As
for me i am looking for a Woman who is honest loving caring kind
hear ted open minded who has sense of humor understandable
considerate loyal polite calm and generous person who has a
prestige and integrity.i would like to see some others pictures of
ur self and i will also exchange mine with u as soon i get ur picx
or u could send me ur email where u would want me email me some of
my pictures to u.I look forward to hear from u soonest and see what
goes on from there or u can also hit me up at brendalouis83 at yah
Take Care

my mom tatted on my ribs..rip. i miss u.

2010-04-28T12:40:00.002-04:00

nuff said:

The Lord Told Me To Date

2010-04-13T14:41:00.002-04:00

I am James, a servant of God, and of the Lord Jesus.

My Self-Summary

Greetings, I'm James!

Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing.

If you need wisdom, ask our generous God, and he will give it to you. He will not rebuke you for asking. But when you ask him, be sure that your faith is in God alone. Do not waver, for a person with divided loyalty is as unsettled as a wave of the sea that is blown and tossed by the wind. Such people should not expect to receive anything from the Lord. Their loyalty is divided between God and the world, and they are unstable in everything they do.

God blesses those who patiently endure testing and temptation. Afterward they will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him. And remember, when you are being tempted, do not say, “God is tempting me.” God is never tempted to do wrong,c and he never tempts anyone else. Temptation comes from our own desires, which entice us and drag us away. These desires give birth to sinful actions. And when sin is allowed to grow, it gives birth to death.

So don’t be misled, my dear brothers and sisters. Whatever is good and perfect comes down to us from God our Father, who created all the lights in the heavens.d He never changes or casts a shifting shadow. He chose to give birth to us by giving us his true word. And we, out of all creation, became his prized possession.

What I’m doing with my life

Seeking first the Kingdom of God!

The first things people usually notice about me

I have been set apart as holy to the LORD my God, and he has chosen me from all the nations of the earth to be his own special treasure!!!!

The six things I could never do without

Believers who are poor have something to boast about, for God has honored them. And those who are rich should boast that God has humbled them. They will fade away like a little flower in the field. The hot sun rises and the grass withers; the little flower droops and falls, and its beauty fades away. In the same way, the rich will fade away with all of their achievements.

I spend a lot of time thinking about

I fix my thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. I think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise because my Lord instructs me to do so!!

Stop worrying about your life—what you will eat or what you will drink—or about your body—what you will wear. Life is more than food, isn't it, and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds in the sky. They don't plant or harvest or gather food into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. You are more valuable than they are, aren't you? Can any of you add a single hour to the length of your life by worrying?

And why do you worry about clothes? Consider the lilies in the field and how they grow. They don't work or spin yarn, but I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was clothed like one of them. Now if that is the way God clothes the grass in the field, which is alive today and thrown into an oven tomorrow, won't he clothe you much better—you who have little faith?

“So don't ever worry by saying, ‘What are we going to eat?’ or ‘What are we going to drink?’ or ‘What are we going to wear?’ because it is the gentiles who are eager for all those things. Surely your heavenly Father knows that you need all of them! But first be concerned about God's kingdom and his righteousness, and all of these things will be provided for you as well.

So never worry about tomorrow, because tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

The most private thing I’m willing to admit here

I have sinned and fallen short of the Glory of God, but the gift of God is eternal life!

I HAVE BEEN REDEEMED BY THE BLOOD OF JESUS CHRIST!!!!

http://www.okcupid.com/profile/servantofchrist?cf=regular

Today has been busy!

2010-04-12T15:04:00.002-04:00

Hi,

How are you today? l hope you are doing good. l just want to say Hi to you because l found interest on you. you looks so young and romantic dear. l would love to hear from you my dear. this is my yahoo I D,xxxxxx@yahoo.com, and i we like to have ur own I D too, ok... so have a nice day...

with love,
Smith

Ahhh...

2010-04-12T15:00:00.001-04:00

HELLO I WAS GOING THROUGH PROFILE ON HERE AND STUMBLE TO YOURS WHICH GOT ME CAPTIVATING COS YOU LOOK LIKE MY MISSING ANGEL....SMILE BACK AT ME...............YOUR PROFILE INTEREST ME WHY DON'T YOU JUST SMILE BACK AT ME WITH BIT OF SCHOOLING ABOUT YOUR GORGEOUS SELF

The Latest...

2010-04-12T08:58:00.001-04:00

we would get along good i can say that now,but you say he dont know me so get along how,then i say loving life ,knowing theres more then what is actually seen,the beauty of a flower ,the feelings that real deep music can evoke ,in us,the emotins two who feel each other can conjur in one another ,lets learn each other so much ,that when you glance my way i know all you want to say without speaking one w ord,let me read to you at nite by candle light,lets laugh so hard our stomaches hurt ,i got you ill say ma if you ever feel afraid,come into my arms ill give you contentness,any way thats all i have to say ,no its not a copy of anything i wrote for anyone else ,i have been on this site three days and was awestruck once i saw you ,hope your day was well sincerely ,Rick

Jeremiah was a Bullfrog

2010-03-26T09:53:00.002-04:00

Keywords Update

2010-03-26T09:46:00.001-04:00

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Sideways...it's not just a movie

2010-03-26T09:38:00.000-04:00

OMG!

2010-03-26T09:14:00.002-04:00

No explanation necessary!

Yeeeeeeeeee Haw

2010-03-26T09:07:00.003-04:00

http://www.plentyoffish.com/viewprofile.aspx?profile_id=18769025

Angry Businessman is back!

2010-03-26T09:05:00.001-04:00

He's obviously forgotten that he already contacted me and I chewed him out, so here's the latest:

I'm a good honest man and it looks like you're a great woman.
I seem to be having a bit of a tough time trying to find a good woman that actually want a man who knows what he wants out of life and exactly how to get it.
It's as if all most woman want these days is some long haired, tattooed bum that spends his non working hours in a drunken stupor at the local bar or in front of the TV.
I'm interested in getting to know you, take a look at my profile.
I hope to hear back from you.
Justin

Of course, I didn't reply then received:

What, I have to much on the ball I supose. Not interested in motivated men I suppose.

Couldn't resist a reply:

Hi, my name is Jennie, and I would love to talk to you. You can see more of my photos and talk to me at http://www.jenniedoescams.com. Enter your credit card number and I'll talk to you soon!

And another:

What, you think I cost too much money? I thought you wanted to talk!

One final one:

Come on, i'm interested in you. Let's get together. Why are you ignoring me? Men don't know a good woman when they see one.

Sadly, I received no reply.

Here we go again

2010-03-26T09:02:00.002-04:00

Got this one today:

sounds to me like you need to be tamed i think i haave the cure just for you good looking i graduated from smartass university so hoe are you todat

Taking a Hiatus

2009-12-14T09:47:00.001-05:00

So, obviously nothing really spectacular has come out of online dating these days. I've pulled my ads for now. I might post one on CL once in awhile for entertainment purposes. Before I go, I decided to clean out my inbox, so here are a few remaining gems:

I'm extremly good at what I do. W/M 45 6'4 7' Cock

To me the most memorable moments of love making or intercourse occurs during foreplay. Those moments when tongues and lips and gentle nibbles are felt prior to penetration.

I love going down on a woman to get her relaxed and enjoy having her legs over my shoulder while I am licking her clit and opening her up with my finger and rubbing around the area to find her G-spot!!! Also like going down around the ass licking it and getting her to grab my hair to get me back lick her clit and fingering her, opening her more and when she is ready for me to put my cock inside her, will have to tease her a little bit to get her a little excited and when the time is right start pounding the pussy and putting her legs up over my shoulders fucking the hell out of her.Those moments when your nipples are so hard they ache, you are wet with the anticipation of the next erotic sensual feel of a tongue against your lips. When your entire being is focused on the sensation that you are experiencing at that moment. Well that what I bring to the table. A magic tongue.

Opening you up and getting you fingers inside you but it does need a little lubrication to open you up, once thats done getting 1 finger in and teasing you and then the 2nd finger getting deeper and then the 3rd and by that time while inside you working and taking my time feeling around watching your face getting even more excited as I am finding that G-spot. Your face tells me if I am getting closer and closer and then having you erupted on my fingers and telling me to go deeper inside you.

--------

very charming guy, has a 4 bed room house drive a range rover

--------

Sounds like you may not be able to handle a good looking guy that is 54, and white. Good luck and have a nice day.

More Keyword Analysis

2009-12-06T16:52:00.002-05:00

First - to the gal I was chatting with at Omegle - my internet dropped out - you were hilarious, feel free to drop me an email, it's on my profile.

NEXT:

Num	Perc.	Search Term
14	17.50%	bare chested men
4	5.00%	BARE CHESTED MEN BLOGSPOT
3	3.75%	barechested men
2	2.50%	my photo editions online
2	2.50%	barechested older men
2	2.50%	online dating rejects
2	2.50%	your race affects whether
2	2.50%	dating nub profile
2	2.50%	online dating blogspot
2	2.50%	bare-chested black men
2	2.50%	best men's dating emails
1	1.25%	pof funny profiles
1	1.25%	black stud blogspot
1	1.25%	your race affects whether people write you back
1	1.25%	10 Stupid Things Men Do
1	1.25%	photo men blog
1	1.25%	online dating @hotmail 2009
1	1.25%	wtf online dating
1	1.25%	can you find out when the profile was created in pof?
1	1.25%	things to talk about in dating email
1	1.25%	when hot men say stupid things
1	1.25%	guys with cell phones
1	1.25%	online dating blog blogdspot.com
1	1.25%	photo funny edition online
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1	1.25%	craigslist jehovah
1	1.25%	online dating she saw picture of me
1	1.25%	bare chest photos Virginia
1	1.25%	rejects online dating
1	1.25%	scruffster
1	1.25%	stupid things to do with email address
1	1.25%	my first online date blogspot.com
1	1.25%	funny stupid things men do
1	1.25%	jehovah witness updates
1	1.25%	photo cropping funny online dating
1	1.25%	jehovah's witness alcoholics anonymous
1	1.25%	POF example profile
1	1.25%	pof douchebags
1	1.25%	dating blogspot
1	1.25%	online dating emails things to talk about
1	1.25%	stupid corporate emails
1	1.25%	what is a pof profile
1	1.25%	things to do with an email
1	1.25%	new profile on pof
1	1.25%	photo bare chest men
1	1.25%	reporting a profile on POF

Ahh...some fresh ones

2009-12-03T12:13:00.000-05:00

I haven't logged in for awhile, but here are a few choice emails I've received:
First, from a 46 year old that can't use spell check - I get this:

Snickerdoodles are nmy favorite cookie. I love to be outdoors and while I hate run, I love to bike.The Caribean is Paradise endless Summer. If you want to contact me view my profile first.

I love that his profile says:

Looking For: Short-term dating, Casual sex

and:

My Self Summary:

I am currently in the process of healing from a marraige gone bad. I have not dated in quite some time. I am looking for someone who is understanding of my limited time and wants to explore their boundries. I am intersted in the envirornment, whole foods yoga and mans connection to spirit. I used to scuba dive and would like to get back into that. I also like to hike and bike. I don't relax well (too busy) but perhaps with the right person I could learn.

You should message me if:

you could put up with someone who puts his kids first and does not have alot of free time, but loves to talk on the phone and wants go out to listen to live music, blues or rock and whatever.....;)

I think he's looking for phone sex. Yeah, sign me up buddy.

-----------

The next email I get was apparently a missed IM. Didn't know I had IM up, but oh well. It said:

how are you

Gee. That really makes me want to respond! Along with this, from his profile:

I'm really good at:

stuck in traffic

I THINK BRIAN REALLY WUNTS TO TALK TO ME

2009-11-22T18:24:00.000-05:00

WELL HELLO THERE

Nov. 22, 2009 – 6:16pm

MY NAME IS BRIAN AND I WOULD LOVE TO TALK TO YOU, YOU SOUND LIKE A CHALLANGE...IN A GOOD WAY, I THINK I CAN KEEP UP WITH YOUR PACE, EXCEPT FOR THE RUNNING--I WOULD RATHER BE AT THE FINISH LINE WITH FLOWERS AND A BOTTLE OF THE BUBBLY TO CONGRADULATE YOU..I HAVE ALSO DONE ALOT OF THINGS AS YOU HAVE, BUT THERE IS ALWAYS MORE THAT NEEDS TO BE DONE, IN NEED ADVENTYRE, THRILLS-SOMEONE SPONTANEOUS, THAT WILL EITHER DO IT OR HAS DONE IT, THERE IS NO CONTEMPLATING HERE!

MY PROFILE ON HERE IS NOT UP TO DATE, THEY ARE MY PICTURES, ABOUT ME QUICK:: 40 yrs old, 6'-0" TALL, LIGHT BROWN HAIR, HAZEL EYES, WEIGHING ABOUT 145, SKINNY/ATHLETIC, WILLING O TRY ANYTHING YOU THROW AT ME,

HOPE YOUR INTERESTED, HERS IS MY E-MAIL ADRESS::

www.BrianShellenberger@gmail.com

OR IF YOUR ON YAHOO

www.BLS_687@yahoo.com

HOPE YOU HAD A GREAT WEEKEND
LOOKING FORWARD TO HEARING FROM YOU BRIAN

Ahh, some fun profiles....

2009-11-22T18:21:00.000-05:00

I really like this one. I'm sure it's self explanatory, but I plan to immortalize the text from both his 'about me' and his 'first date' sections...I'm guessing "Rusheed" doesn't realize that he has put his 'form email' in the body of his profile instead of in an email. Then again, maybe he does and doesn't care...

Hi,
My name is Rachid "Rusheed". I hope you are doing well. I very much enjoyed reading your profile and upon finishing that , I decided to write to you. Like you, I believe things happen for a good reason and there is wisom to be learned from each act in our lives. It depends on us if we are capable to read between the lines and view thing with the vision of our minds and not only our eyes.. I am spirtual and I find peace and plasure in pondering, contemplating and analysing things. I can go on and on... Hopefully, I can hear from you and see if we have more interesting things to share.
Have a wonderful day. I am about to go out to Baltimore harbor, I love walking around the harbor, have a Potbelly sandwich and maybe a Haggen Daz Ice cream from the food court there and watch the boat from the bench... them make it back home... today is sunny and beautiful and I do not want to miss it ... Have fun! :) Rusheed.
PS: I changed my birthday on here by one year lol 1973 to 1974 so I can send you this message lol.

http://www.plentyoffish.com/viewprofile.aspx?profile_id=16397644

Also, a bitter woman for the collection:

Because the way to save your marriage is to 'get even' instead of 'getting a divorce'. My fave part is how she says she only plans to be with 2 men. Her affair, and her husband (who cheated on her). I guess she doesn't hate him enough to stop having sex with him. ha!

I am on this site mainly because my husband sees fit to fill out every god d*mn cheating website known to man, and thinks that I will never find out and I always do.

Well guess what mother ****er two can play this game
Let's see if the grass is greener on the other side

* Update- Let me clarify the meaning of "getting even" I am not the kind of girl that spreads her legs to a total stranger, I need to know you first and have some kind of feelings for you and also I need to be attracted to you as well, it is not just a one way street here. The person I choose to be with on the "side", since my husband doesn't seem to know the value of marriage, will be someone who respects me as a woman and does not go sticking his****in every woman he meets, I will be with one man only besides my scum bag husband. Ok let's just say I am looking for an affair NSA, if that makes any sense..........Thankyou! Any sickos out there that just want to meet and **** will immediately get deleted and blocked!

http://www.plentyoffish.com/member9978706.htm