Onwords™

2009 Read With Kids Challenge

2009-04-09T14:49:00.005-04:00

The 2009 Read With Kids Challenge, sponsored by Reading Is Fundamental (RIF) and US Airways, has officially taken off!

From the RIF website: "This year, the Challenge aims to collectively log 5 million minutes spent reading with children from April 1-June 30. Reading books with your kids is still important despite the fact that kids today read everything from text messages to endless Web sites on the Internet-- sometimes it takes a good old-fashioned book to help them advance their reading skills."

Log on today to create a team or begin tracking your individual progress.

Sally Bacchetta - Freelance Writer
Freelance Writer
Parenting

Why is it...

2008-09-02T15:16:00.001-04:00

Why is it that a Puerto Rico t-shirt on a white person or a PR flag bumper sticker is assumed to be a souvenir of a fun vacation, but a Puerto Rico t-shirt on a Latino person or a PR flag on their car is taken as a sign of hostility or that they're not "a real American"?

Why is it that NARAL has been re-named several times, with less emphasis on abortion with each successive name? Originally called the National Association for the Repeal of Abortion Laws, then the National Abortion Rights Action League, the National Abortion & Reproductive Rights Action League, and now NARAL Pro-Choice America. If you believe a woman has the right to abort the life within her, why take "abortion" out of your name? Why call it "reproductive freedom" or "reproductive justice" instead of "abortion"?

Why is it that Bill and Monica were none of our business but Bristol and Levi are? (Spare me the skew that it's different because the Palin's purport to be conservative, religious, etc.) Are other people's sex lives our business or not? Gay, straight, teen, adult, John Edwards, Elliot Spitzer...? It's a 'yes' or 'no' question.

Why is it that so many self-titled Christians express and demonstrate extreme intolerance, when according to the Bible, Jesus calls us to peace?

Why is it that so many self-titled Muslims express and demonstrate extreme intolerance, when Islam is a religion of peace?

Why is it that some people defend Muslims in general while attacking Christians in general for the same behavior?

Why is it that people from both major political parties seem convinced that the other party controls the media?

Sally Bacchetta - Freelance Writer
Freelance Writer
Parenting

Sarah Palin: What does the VP do?

2008-08-28T15:58:00.000-04:00

The joke of the week has been vice presidential candidate Sarah Palin's statement that she doesn't actually know what the vice president does. The real joke, however, is the one played on the American public by the media, who overwhelmingly have taken Palin's quote out of context for no other reason (that I can think of) than to make Palin sound stupid and unqualified.

I don't know if she is either stupid or unqualified; I haven't heard enough from her to know. What I do know is that what Palin said - when taken in it's entirety - makes her sound challenging and productive.

She may or may not be those things, but any media who think I'm too stupid to figure it out for myself is unqualified to call what it reports "news."

What Palin really said:
When Larry Kudlow of CNBC's "Kudlow & Co." asked her about the possibility of becoming McCain's ticket mate, Palin replied:
"As for that VP talk all the time, I'll tell you, I still can't answer that question until somebody answers for me what is it exactly that the VP does every day? I'm used to being very productive and working real hard in an administration. We want to make sure that that VP slot would be a fruitful type of position, especially for Alaskans and for the things that we're trying to accomplish up here for the rest of the U.S., before I can even start addressing that question."

It seems obvious to me that her question about the VP position was rhetorical. Like labeling some crimes "hate crimes." What the hell are the others? "Love crimes"?

Sally Bacchetta - Freelance Writer
Freelance Writer
Parenting

Word Burning

2008-01-01T06:08:00.001-05:00

I'd like to add a few to this list of overused words and phrases from Lake Superior State University.

Download - As in "Thanks for letting me download all of that."

Undocumented Worker - Non-citizens who enter any country illegally are illegal aliens. A kid with a paper route who hasn't gotten working papers yet is an undocumented worker.

Irregardless - Always used to mean "regardless", so just say "regardless".

Pro-Choice - Unless you provide equal financial, political, educational, emotional, social, and physical support to women who choose life for their unborn children, it's not really pro-choice. It's pro-abortion. Why not say that?

Personal - "My personal opinion." "My personal friend." "My personal favorite." If it's yours, of course it's personal.

Knowingly - As in "I never knowingly took steroids." Irregardless of your celebrity status, you're responsible for what goes in your body. Right, Jamie Lynn?

Clinton

Sally Bacchetta - Freelance Writer
Freelance Writer
Parenting
Motherhood

Drunken Monkeys

2007-08-07T07:04:00.000-04:00

Too bad Spam messages aren't ever as funny as their subject lines.

Some of my recent favorites:

Some millstone promiscuity
Jonathan, a gill
Fannie, or cardboard
Raymond deactivate
Lou incomplete
Him housewares but smoky
Quite dominion but millionth
Half candidate in reproach
She amulet the embellish
Friends he accumulated
Some frame the ankle
Inventive with relish

Sally Bacchetta - Freelance Writer
Freelance Writer
Parenting
Motherhood

Disorder in the Court

2007-04-23T08:00:00.001-04:00

These are from a book called Disorder in the Court and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters who had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place.

ATTORNEY: What is your date of birth?
WITNESS: July 18th.
ATTORNEY: What year?
WITNESS: Every year.

ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
WITNESS: I forget.
ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?

ATTORNEY: How old is your son, the one living with you?
WITNESS: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.
ATTORNEY: How long has he lived with you?
WITNESS: Forty-five years.

ATTORNEY: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo?
WITNESS: We both do.
ATTORNEY: Voodoo?
WITNESS: We do.
ATTORNEY: You do?
WITNESS: Yes, voodoo.

ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his
sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?

ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he?
WITNESS: Uh, he's twenty-one.

ATTORNEY: She had three children, right?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
WITNESS: None.
ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?

ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?
WITNESS: By death.
ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?

ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?
WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard.
ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?

ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a
deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.

ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you
go to?
WITNESS: Oral.

ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
WITNESS: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was
doing an autopsy on him!

ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
WITNESS: Huh?

ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check
for a pulse?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY: But could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.

Sally Bacchetta - Freelance Writer
Freelance Writer
Parenting
Motherhood

It Was Just An e-Greeting

2007-02-14T08:23:00.000-05:00

It read, "Let our lives be our Thanksgiving".

I've been turning that phrase over in my mind for the last eight hours.

Is my life my Thanksgiving? In some ways, yes.

I give thanks each morning for the blessings of another day: to hear my daughter play in her crib and see my husband across the breakfast table; for the ability to taste fresh fruit and touch warm laundry and smell the rain.

I give thanks each afternoon for the confidence that the schoolbus winding through my neighborhood carries only children, not bombs. I know that such confidence is a luxury. I give thanks for the ability to bend and stretch and walk without pain, and I'm grateful to have enough food to prepare dinner for my family.

I give thanks each night that I live in this country, where despite religious, political, racial and social discord, I am free to believe what I want to believe and free to speak it openly.

Is my life my Thanksgiving? In some ways, no.

In line at the bank, I'm more likely to feel impatient with waiting than grateful that I have money to withdraw.

Bagging leaves in my yard, I sometimes feel annoyed at the chore rather than grateful for the beauty and wonder of mature trees.

My To Do list is too long, the weekends are too short, and my family too far away. Or I'm blessed to have a full life, two days off every week, and reasons to roadtrip to eight other states. It all depends on how I look at it.

It was just an e-greeting, but I'm keeping it in my Inbox. I may need the reminder a few days from now when I'm scrubbing crayon off the wall.

Sally Bacchetta - Freelance Writer
Freelance Writer
Parenting
Motherhood

Challenges of the English Language

2006-01-02T08:22:00.000-05:00

Ah, the challenges of the English language.
Can you read these correctly the first time? Have fun!

1) The bandage was wound around the wound.
2) The farm was used to produce produce.
3) The landfill was so full, they had to refuse more refuse.
4) Please polish the Polish furniture.
5) He could be in the lead if he would get the lead out.
6) The soldier chose to desert his dessert in the desert.
7) Since there is no time like the present, it is time to present the present.
8) A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
10) I did not object to the object.
11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
12) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
13) They were too close to the door to close it.
14) The buck does strange antics when does are around.
15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
17) The wind was too strong for us to wind the sail.
18) I shed a tear upon seeing the tear in the painting.
19) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.
20) I need to intimate this to my most intimate friend?

Sally Bacchetta - Freelance Writer
Freelance Writer
Parenting
Motherhood

Cast a "spell"

2005-12-13T08:17:00.000-05:00

Olny srmat poelpe can.

cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg.
The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at
Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a
wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in
the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it
wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey
lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh?
yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt!

if you can raed tihs psas it on !!

Sally Bacchetta - Freelance Writer
Freelance Writer
Parenting
Motherhood

Church Bulletins

2005-12-04T08:37:00.000-05:00

Always proofread! Check out these announcements that actually appeared in church bulletins:

This morning's sermon: "Jesus Walks on Water." This evening's sermon: "Searching for Jesus."

Our youth basketball team is back in action Wednesday at 8 pm in the recreation hall. Come out and watch us kill Christ the King.

Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our community. Smile at someone who is hard to love. Say "Hell" to someone who doesn't care much about you.

For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.

Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24th. So ends a friendship that began in their school days.

Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children.

Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you want remembered.

Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 pm. Please use the back door.

Ladies Bible Study will be held Thursday morning at 10 a.m. All ladies are invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B.S. is done.

Sally Bacchetta - Freelance Writer
Freelance Writer
Parenting
Motherhood

Signs

2005-09-09T07:00:00.000-04:00

Choose your words carefully...

Sign on a Proctologist's door-
"To expedite your visit please back in."

On a Maternity Room door-
"Push. Push. Push."

At an Optometrist's Office--
"If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right
place."

In a Podiatrist's office-
"Time wounds all heels"

On a Gynceologist's door-
"Dr. Jones, at your cervix."

On a Septic Tank Truck in Oregon-
"Yesterday's Meals on Wheels"

And don't forget this sign at a Chicago Radiator Shop--
"Best place in town to take a leak."

Writing: A Ticket to Work... or a Ticket Out

2005-08-21T09:29:00.000-04:00

A survey of 120 major American corporations affiliated with Business Roundtable, employing nearly 8 million people, concludes that in today's workplace, writing is a "threshold skill" for hiring and promotion among salaried employees. Survey results indicate that writing is a ticket to professional opportunity, while poorly written job applications are a figurative kiss of death. Estimates based on the survey returns reveal that employers spend billions annually correcting writing deficiencies.

Download the report:
National Commission on Writing for America's Families, Schools, and Colleges

Sally Bacchetta - Freelance Writer

RFID: Spychips

2005-08-05T15:44:00.000-04:00

This excerpt from my RFID blog illustrates the power of words to form impressions.

"It's not easy for me to say this, but I'm apprehensive about Katherine Albrecht's book Spychips: How Major Corporations and Government Plan to Track Your Every Move with RFID.

It's the book's description on publisher Nelson Current's website that gives me pause: 'An explosive exposé on how... this seemingly innocuous commercial maneuver will inevitably turn our society into a Big Brother nightmare.", and "..., Spychips explains RFID technology and reveals the history and future of the master planners’ strategies to imbed these trackers on everything—from postage stamps to shoes to people themselves—and spy on Americans without our knowledge or consent.'

'inevitably turn our society into a Big Brother nightmare... master planners’ ...'

I hope that Spychips is a testament to Albrecht's talent and experience, and not the hyperbolic caricature this description suggests. I hope that the book illuminates the actual, substantive complexities of a radio frequency culture.

I don't want Albrecht to be another advocate-gone-zealot, pimping overblown Orwell references that ultimately (and probably unintentionally) undermine thoughtful examination of RFID.

Those of us who seek transparency can not afford to subordinate language to advance our agenda.

That was Orwell's nightmare.

Sally Bacchetta - Freelance Writer

Permanent Press: Keep Your Company in the News

2005-08-01T16:56:00.000-04:00

When is your best advertisement not an advertisement? When it's a press release.

In the competition for consumer attention, a well-written press release is one of your most important marketing tools.

A press release puts you on the front page of the public mind. It is an opportunity to build name recognition and generate interest in your company without delivering a sales message.

Read more in my freelance writer website column.

World Book Day 2005

2005-06-27T11:52:00.000-04:00

Can you envision a day without any written communication? Think about it. No newspapers, no ‘to do’ lists, no magazines, memos, phone messages or e-mail. Not even any road signs or restaurant menus. Can you imagine a week like this? A year? For the 860 million adults who do not know how to read this sentence, lack of written communication may define their entire lives.

Since 1995 the United Nations Educational, Scientific and Cultural Organization (UNESCO) has worked to erase that statistic. Through its annual World Book Day, UNESCO illuminates the issue of illiteracy and encourages cooperation between the publishing and educational sectors, promoting the importance of reading for both individuals and society.

World Book Day 2005 marked UNESCO’s latest, and most comprehensive, literacy effort. Included in this year’s reading initiative was the Spread the Word campaign, a program designed specifically to advance adult literacy.

Free Spread the Word postcards were available in libraries, bookstores, coffee shops, magazines and newspapers. UNESCO asked people who enjoy reading to use the postcards to encourage their friends and family members to read, by sending personalized recommendations of their favorite books.

Children, too, play a vital role in promoting literacy. That is the message UNESCO conveyed with their World Book Day Book Tokens. Through the generous support of National Book Tokens Ltd., school children throughout the world received special tokens to exchange at participating bookstores for a book or audio book of their choice. UNESCO recognizes that children’s natural enthusiasm for learning is a key factor in developing a lifelong appreciation for reading.

Since the beginning of written language, people have used writing to define, clarify, influence and preserve their cultural norms and history. Technological evolutions mean more information is communicated in less time, and those who lack basic literacy skills fall further behind. World Book Day is an annual opportunity to close the gap.

Visit my freelance writer website column for more information.

Word Play - Palindromania

2005-05-16T09:22:00.000-04:00

A palindrome is a word or phrase that reads the same forward and backward. RADAR, NOON and RACECAR are single word palindromes. They're fun and fairly easy to think of.

The real challenge lies in forming palindrome pharases. MADAM, I'M ADAM and A MAN, A PLAN, A CANAL -- PANAMA are two well-known examples.

The following list of palindromes is excerpted from www.fun-with-words.com.

Don't nod
Never odd or even
Too bad – I hid a boot
Rats live on no evil star
No trace; not one carton
Was it Eliot's toilet I saw?
Murder for a jar of red rum
May a moody baby doom a yam?
Go hang a salami; I'm a lasagna hog!
A Toyota! Race fast... safe car: a Toyota
Are we not drawn onward, we few, drawn onward to new era?
Doc Note: I dissent. A fast never prevents a fatness. I diet on cod
Anne, I vote more cars race Rome to Vienna
Sums are not set as a test on Erasmus
Some men interpret nine memos
Campus Motto: Bottoms up, Mac
Madam, in Eden I'm Adam
Oozy rat in a sanitary zoo
Lisa Bonet ate no basil
Do geese see God?
God saw I was dog

Send me your best original palindromes for a future feature!

Write On! - Key Components of Successful Business Communication

2005-04-25T21:30:00.000-04:00

Written communication is often the first impression you make on potential customers, business partners, or employers. Because of its significance to your marketing message, it is one of the most important aspects of your business. more

Tennessee Williams

2005-03-26T09:14:00.000-05:00

Tennessee Williams was born on this date in 1911, forever changing the world and our words.

Williams brilliantly expressed the best and the worst of human nature in his plays, poems and stories. Among his twenty-five full length plays are "The Glass Menagerie", "A Streetcar Named Desire", "Cat on a Hot Tin Roof" and "Night of the Iguana".

For his genius use of the written word, Williams received critical acclaim (two Pulitzer Prizes and four New York Drama Critics Circle Awards) and unshakeable status as one of America's greatest playwrights.

Click here for a complete list of Williams' writing.

Scarlet Letter

2005-03-16T12:23:00.000-05:00

Nathaniel Hawthorne's The Scarlet Letter was first published March 16, 1850.

His story of a seventeenth-century Boston community is as relevant and compelling today as when it was then. Through the alienated but self-actualizing young Hester Prynne, and her idolized but tortured lover Arthur Dimmesdale, Hawthorne contrasts the competing forces of society and self-determination.

Clearly, Hawthorne understood the nature of conflict between society and the individuals who comprise it. When the interests of the individual oppose the interests of the community, to whom is the individual bound? To the Self or to Society?

What happens to Society if everyone serves the Self?
Can the Self evolve authentically in servitude to Society?
Which is the greater moral imperative, and how is it best resolved?

The Scarlet Letter is a masterful presentation of the inevitability of this conflict. Hawthorne writes with characteristic surgical precision of the impossibility of enlightenment by preservation. Ultimately, one must be sacrificed for the other.

Sally - Freelance Writer

International Women's Day 2005 - A Writer's Reflections

2005-03-08T13:46:00.000-05:00

It’s a great day to be a woman and a writer. Today is International Women’s Day 2005. It is the 94th annual celebration of the power of women to create change.

Today I honor the women who have changed me with their words. I thank the women who have listened to mine.

My mother taught me to love words. She was my first librarian. Right before my young eyes she nourished page after page of strange black print into colorful people and irresistible adventures.

My sisters and brothers taught me the power of words. “We’ll take turns opening our Christmas presents. We’ll go oldest to youngest”, my older siblings used to say. “First, last, bigger, smaller, more, less, mine, yours... I’m telling Mom.” The power of words.

The authors of my childhood – Louisa May Alcott, Judy Blume, Beverly Cleary, Louise Fitzhugh, Esther Hautzig, Lois Lenski, Laura Ingalls Wilder – made me want to write.

My teachers – Marty Colburn, Charlotte Randall, Jeannie Giorgioni and Alma Read – made me want to write well.

I am an evolution of all the women who have touched my life with their words. In celebration of International Women’s Day 2005 I want to express special gratitude to:

Emily Dickinson for startling me with the beauty of structure and economy.

Maya Angelou for teaching me to ripen.

Clara Barton, Anne Frank, Sally Hemmings, Helen Keller, Rosa Parks, Sally Ride, Sacagawea, Elizabeth Cady Stanton, Harriet Tubman, and Emma Willard for compelling the world.

Mariane Pearl for reminding me to embrace life. “By killing Danny, terrorists took my life as well but could not lay claim to my spirit.” Mariane Pearl, April 2002 (Mariane’s husband, journalist Daniel Pearl, was brutally murdered by terrorists in February 2002).

Jane Denton for shaping my earliest impressions of hope. Jane’s husband, Admiral Jeremiah Denton, was a POW and leader of American resistance in the Communist Vietnamese prison camps from 1965-1973. During that time Jane raised their seven children, mobilized our Virginia Beach community, and never, ever gave up.

Mother Teresa for convincing me of the utter fortitude of grace.

Glennda Dove for teaching me that making music requires more than reading notes.

My Ganny for her willing struggle to write to me after her stroke.

Thanks to all of you for making me a better woman and a better writer.

Happy International Women’s Day!

Sally - Freelance Writer

The Power of the Written Word

2005-03-06T11:06:00.000-05:00

Words are the foundation of our interactions with the world. I plan to explore this topic through a series of posts dedicated to the impact of words.

Check back soon or visit my freelance writer website column for more information.