Open Dialogue

Hello forever old blog of mine

2015-09-13T16:27:00.001-07:00

Note: none of these posts are new. I just pulled them for a few days off of the blog because I had not used the blog since, literally 2012 (I was 19 and oh so dedicated and had even realized how far the feminism rabbit hole runs. I'm like to the paoint wheere I talk in concept and terms and feminism itself is implied but not a term I actually use at this point). A lot has happened in these years. I promise to update though.

Another war?

2012-03-05T23:18:00.000-08:00

Is what I've been hearing. this time, on women. If you're a tumblr addict (like myself), and watch the feminism tag closely, then you'll have see the ever increasingly popular phrase "The war on women." I find it shocking that NOW women have declared this war. Don't get me wrong, i'm extremely happy people are coming to realize we need to stand up and do something, but none of this is "new". What's changed is because of how non-assertive and silent we've been for quite a while (I know there's been people doing things, but lets be honest, on a MASS level, it's been ignored), this has allowed misogyny to bloom, the stereotypes the evolve into a strong prejudice and men like the Republican candidates to assume positions of power leaving us, defenseless.
The war on women, it's here baby, it's happening, and we gotta do something about it.
If I told you that you could change things, you'd probably be all "...you're stupid" and if I told you that you have the power to do something, once again you'd probably be hitting the block button or exiting this page. So I'm not gonna tell you that.
All I know is that, if I do something, and you do something, then we'll have done something. And that is all that matters.

What. A. Shame.

2012-03-04T00:09:00.000-08:00

I've been browsing through events to participate in that involve empowerment, women, feminism(s) and things of that nature and I'm really disappointed. There are pockets, here and there of blog event, but all are spaced out (time wise) and noncontinuous blogs. It's like they were empowered to do it, did it for a while, then after the event(s) either lost interest or feel satisfied. It's a shame that there's more web events centered around women's "fitness" (I use the term loosely because generally it turns into a "you're-not-skinny-enough" issue), appearance (i.e. make-up, modeling, clothing) and dating (generally encouraging only heterosexuals).
It's a shame that in this age of technology we're still not seeing more empowerment, support and education.
See, there is nothing wrong with fitness, expressing your style or dating, but it becomes a problem when it's limited to that' when there isn't any alternative, no solid positive empowerment. This is increasingly becoming more and more problematic.
You know, I will get back to this theme later (the limitations of things regarding women- not the blogging events). It is part of a much bigger problem....

Today, it's a a wee bit different.

2012-03-03T20:05:00.001-08:00

Instead of honoring a woman of history (or who should be in history), I'm highlighting a team of young women who made an outstanding Media Matters video about being a young black woman in America.
Directed and filmed by Kiri Davis, produced by Reel Works Teen Filmmaking, special thanks to Urban Academy High School and all the young women involved! Thank you for sharing your experiences and thoughts! I hope you enjoy A Girl Like Me, as much as I have. :)

Oh, dear Rush Limbaugh,

2012-03-02T23:39:00.001-08:00

I'm upset Rush. Do you wanna know why I'm upset? Really, go ahead, ask.
I've heard, from a little birdy called the Media, that you called a Georgetown student a slut.
And, no no, that isn't all I heard. I'm told you went on, elaborated, that by paying for their [her] contraception, one would be paying for their [her] sex. This is where, correct me if I'm wrong, you felt privilege enough to proceed to say that that made her a prostitute? I'm appalled. Oh, and it gets worse. You concluded with because you'd be paying for the sex, it's only rational that they'd [she'd] "post the videos online so we can all watch" (Limbaugh, thestar.com).
Don't try defending yourself to me! I heard what you told the Media!
“Amazingly, when there is the slightest bit of opposition to this new welfare entitlement being created, then all of a sudden we hate women! We want ’em barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen, and now, at the end of this week, I am the person that the women of America are to fear the most" (Limbaugh,thestar.com). Well, wouldn't I hate to bust your bubble, but it doesn't make you the most fear. What it makes you is the target of the anger you've incited in all, women, men and intersex individuals. You didn't just infuriate a few "small" people, you've insulted women's sexual freedom, men's too [considering that if their partner doesn't want a child and he doesn't want a child, and you've decided that abortions are morally wrong, sooo...you're forcing both parties into parenthood too?] , you've clearly shown through these actions how very little respect you have for women's rights, and how little you know about birth control to start with. My dear Rush, "new" this is not, makes me ponder how much you know about American history really... Degrading and humiliating anyone is not a slight opposition Rush, it's a person, malicious attack . You do realize how this reflects on you, don't you? I suppose not, but I will let you know that that nomination to be president, yeeaah, it ain't coming your way hun.

Glady looking forward to not seeing your name on the ballot,

Silla

Feminism basics, 101, novice, something to start you off with at least.

2012-03-02T22:18:00.000-08:00

                  Part of the reason I started this blog is because of the appalling lack of general knowledge I’ve been seeing online. I’ve seeing groups basing all their actions and ideas on some ridiculous stereotypes, mind you, I wouldn’t mind so much if they weren’t creating so much resentment among men and other women along with making life difficult for those of us that do have the basics covered and are trying to move up on the knowledge bar past intermediate to proficient and beyond. If there’s ANYTHING you don’t understand, leave me a comment and I’ll try to clarify (I do find it a bit hard to dumb down stuff, which is why when I write I talk to my brother or mother because they’ll let me know when I’ve lost them or made no sense to someone who either doesn’t have the vocabulary terms or understanding of it yet).

Feminism: (dictionary meaning) the advocacy of women's rights on the grounds of political, social, and economic equality to men.

This is as rudimentary as it’s going to get when defining feminism. After this it’s generally defined as;

- a collection of movements aimed at defining, establishing, and defending equal political, economic, and social rights for women.

                 Please note it’s a collection of movements, which means there is no one true and only feminism as you see so many swearing by (example. I am a radical feminist. NOTE. It’s much more complicated than I’m making it sound, see my I Am. post for a breakdown of what I, personally, stand for as a radical feminist who also believes in other forms of feminism as well). That said, you’ll notice that when I refer to feminism, I add a (s) at the end, or I’ll use adjectives like “generally,” “hegemonically,” “ideologically,” “many” and “almost all,” but I will not say “all” or try to speak for all, because, well, I can’t and I shouldn’t (so, if at anytime I do, please feel free to call me on it and I’ll apologize and fix it because I truly strive to avoid doing that). The reason I don’t approve of the “spokesman” routine (speaking for everybody under a massive umbrella term) is because it leads to exclusion and can result in denying someone’s experience because it doesn’t fit your own.
Now that we have a basic understanding of feminism(s), let’s turn our attention to what makes it a collection, an active group, a physical movement itself, the people themselves, feminists.
                   It’s a term I’ve seen many hesitate to use in relation to one’s self, often tipped toed around like a slur or derogatory term because of the negative condensations due to all the stereotypes and prejudice attached to it, that does,come to mind when you say the word (i.e. bra burning, non-shaving, man-hating, lesbians- none – except the hating men part, are actually bad things by themselves [If someone wants to burn their bra, it’s none of my business, have fun; but generally due to their expense in the first place, most just don’t wear it if they don’t want to], but have all been used to devalue and "degrade" feminists by making them their “must be” truths).

Feminist: (n) A person who supports feminism. (ad) Of, relating to, or supporting feminism.

Note, no sex or gender is even implied in the fundamentally basic definition of what a feminist is. As you can see, it builds apon block one (feminism).

This is as basic as basic can get. If you did not know this stuff before, you do now, congrats: You've leveled up! You are now a novice! If you did/do have this knowledge, it's great to review and refresh your brain (healthy too, keeps the eye on the prize). So take your time to digest this knowledge, this'll be here for you to come back to review.

AND! If you happen to know any great feminist online communities, that would be FANNNNNtastic if you shared it with us.

Highlighting The Empress of the Blues

2012-03-02T19:30:00.001-08:00

The Empress of the Blues, Bessie Smith, was born into poverty in Chattanooga, Tennessee in 1895, started performing on the streets with her brother Andrew at age 9 to support their (by then) parent-less family. She was given her by Ma Rainey in a dance/singing company, and began her recording career in 1923 despite the amount of discrimination against her. Bessie was large framed, almost 6 feet tall, nearly 200 pounds, very dark-skinned and -something a LOT of people, books and sites seem to magically look over and forget, bisexual. That same year she met and married Jack Gee, while their marriage was full of infidelity on both sides, years later, after catching him with one of her backup singers, she chased him down a railroad track in New York with a shotgun in her hand (THAT is my favorite Bessie story ever). This is probably why you'll see her described as a rough, crude, violent woman, even though she was know to give money to her family and friends on a regular bases to help them support themselves (I'd consider her rather generous). Needless to say, that marriage did not survive, although they never divorced. Bessie become the richest African-American woman of her time, however, this was short lived, for she died in 1937 in a car accident, with her lover Richard Morgan (Lionel Hampton's uncle). Since her death, her music continues to win over new fans and collections of her songs have sold well over the years. Smith has been immortalized in numerous works, including Edward Albee's 1961 play The Death of Bessie Smith.
This is just a glance in to who Bessie was and her life, I strongly encourage you to check out this L I N K to listen to a sample of her music followed by a longer and more indepth look at her life (there text, but for ya'll who, like me, are more visual learned, there's an AWESOME video MiniBio- which started with her singing).

Honoring Elizabeth Horton Sheff

2012-03-01T14:09:00.002-08:00

This month I would like to honor different women for their accomplishments, contributions and strength. I am NOT going to write about the women we learn about every single year because there're some many more women from all over the world, poor/middle class/rich, of color, disabled/abled, LBTTQQ... that go without recognition ever single year for their AMAZING achivements and lives.
I will kick it this all off by honoring....

Elizabeth Horton Sheff, the woman who brought the Charter schools case to superior court and won a landmark decision regarding civil rights and the right to education. Although she is responsible for Connecticut having charter and magnet schools and (on a national level) for charter school's receiving publicity and becoming more acceptable, you won't even see her name on Wiki and you'll be lucky if the case itself is mention in history books. The case, better known as Sheff vs. O'neill, is under her son's name, for he was her inspiration for fighting for equality in the school system. Her argument was, although Brown vs. Board made it illegal to racially segregate schools, due to red lining in the 60's creating pockets of communities with share ethnicity and race which still culturally affect major cities across the USA (or more specific to the case, Hartford, CT) school districts became racial divided and have fluctuated very little since. These communities were racially divided, which means they were also denied opportunities to advance beyond their social class; today these communities continue to be impoverish, which is reflected in the amount of tax revenue collect in these areas. The low tax revenues reflects directly in the access to resources and funding available to the schools in the districts. On these grounds being required by law to only attend the school in your district without any alternatives available violates the Brown vs. Broad ruling and it's on these grounds she made history. The case was opened in 1989, a year later while there was no progress in CT, the awareness it generated was reflected in Minnesota's passing the first charter school law in 1991, California became second, in 1992.

Recently, I'm aware that she's on the Hartford Council Board, responsible for a district-wide essay compitition held in 2007, which had ask students why diversity is important to the school system (I know this because I was one of the top 3 winners of this compitition my freashman year of high school and met her at the awards ceremony) and she is a constributor to the free SAT prep program for the inner city youth of Hartford (a program I participated in, twice).I attended one of the first magnet schools founded in direct result of the superior court ruling.

She is a living hero, who may not be in the history books for her constribution to racial equality and the right to education, but to me she will alway be a hero worth honoring (I own her my high school education, my high SAT and ACT scores and the cash reward prize that paid for my college deposit).

Thank you Elizabeth Horton Sheff,

My life would be very different right now if you hadn't stood up and created change.

I do not own this picture of her; it's from her website, http://uhaweb.hartford.edu/SHEFF/About%20Me.html

Yeah,

2012-03-01T05:23:00.002-08:00

He drove a white truck,

Couldn’t tell you the make or model because I wasn’t paying attention.

I was minding my own business, waiting to cross the street, my mind on the
subway club swinging from my wrist and how very delicious it was going to be
once I got the chance to eat it.

So when this 60 something year old man pulled up to the intersection, pausing
to turn on to the main road, I paid absolutely no mind,

Encompassed within that pausing moment, that head to toe glance, things were
written on to my body.

Labels, categories, stereotypes,

all of my sudden “must be” truths.

The feeling must have swollen up so intensely inside him he couldn’t help but
verbalize his aggression.

My mind, once thinking about food and it’s many flavors, was snatched away as
I was now to walk home under the weight of his judgment.

SPIC

laid thick and heavy upon my chest, as I was left standing stunned stupid with
shock on the corner.

No, I wasn’t surprised; I have been branded with this word before,

But before this time, it was never truly acknowledged as something that hurt
me by others.

When you’re several shades of gray, others have a tendency to push you away
from the side of the spectrum they’re located at. At least, that’s been my
experience.

Not white enuf, not dark enuf,

So when racial slurs have been thrown my way in the past, those who identified
with parts of me decided I am not whole enuf for it to matter, my experiences
were

m a r g i n a l i z e d .

Now it’s different, now I am in a culture where strangers call me brown,

Where being me as a whole, being

m u l t i r a c i a l

Is respected, my experiences

i n c l u d e d ,

Even if my listener doesn’t fully identify with or understand my position.

It makes things easier,

It makes things harder.

I am

2012-03-01T01:07:00.000-08:00

A Radical Woman of Color Feminist.

It focuses on dismantling the patriarchy as a system of power. Now, if you’ve read definitions produce by groups like MRA (Men's / Father's Rights Activist), which state that “Feminists taught you that your history with men was of unremitting evil; that you were chattel, slaves to men who held all power and shut you out with extreme intent. They even gave it a name. Patriarchy” then you’ve been mislead by common stereotypes and prejudice generated by major sexism. Now, I’m not against groups that focus on detoxicifying and redefining masculinity, because part of the overall solution is also to improve things for men too (libaration is not superiority) and I realize that much of these misunderstandings comes from a place of hurt in their lives. Patriarchy is a system of power which favors and rewards the male gender, holding it as a primary authority figure central to social organization. No, it is not a system men run, think of it more as a system set up hundreds of years ago that runs on its own, a system in which we are all born into and perpetuate without the realizing it. It screws us all equally in different ways, where is has withheld rights and access to representation and media equality for women, it is also responsible for the gender roles dividing up expectations between all genders, the tough guise men are expected to embody without thought about the consequences on a hegemonic level (dominant values/ideas of the masses) and the interactions and appearances we expect of the ideal two genders/sexes.

If from that you assumed that as a radical feminist I am for discussing and dis-empowering gender roles, than you would be correct. NOTE, I am a radical feminist, but I cannot speak for all who identify as one as well.
But I do understand why the feminist community itself has it's reserves about it. One half is completly because there are extremely toxic and bad radical feminist. I am not going to defend them. They can be racist and cissexist and uphold sex binaries. Not going to erase that. But the other half is that because racism and cissexism and heterosexism weren't actively apart of mainstream feminism until recent times (and even then it's pathetically weak)- the history of radical feminists of color and LGBT+ are completly taken out of the dialogue.

Now that You have a basic understanding of what I stand for, I'll elaborate on other things I personally support as a feminist. I am for abortion rights (I don't use the term pro-choice because not everyone accepts the term and is offensive to those, who historically, weren't given one and have had to suffer from eugenics movements), against slut-shaming, for positive body images, multiracial feminism, trans feminism, multicultural feminism, believe in sexual freedom, and the study masculine theory as well.

I enjoy discussing feminism and the various types because in the process I generally learn more about my comfort zone, what's out there and how others feel about different issues. I like to find creative ways to respond to criticism and especially to negative actions/comments. Instead of getting worked up- as I've seen many do- I like to dissect what they've presented and use it as a tool of discussion and understanding.

Online, there's about a thousand different places you'll find negativity, animosity, discouragement and people willing to silence and disrespect others for talking about feminism. It's outrageous how discussions turn into debates in a blink of an eye, which is why I encourage you to seek out information and knowledge, so that the next time you encounter a critique or ignorance, you can utilize what you've learned, your experiences and thoughts to not only defend, but engage the person(s) in discussion and come to a productive understanding even if you are still in disagreement.

Let's change the stereotypes. Let's break the cycle. Create your own open dialogues.

Dialogue.

2012-02-29T22:16:00.000-08:00

It’s a simple enough word, but takes serious skill to utilize.

Through out my posts, I will try my best to utilize dialogue to engage and discuss issues (such as feminisms, racism, classism, sexism, genderism, heterosexism, ect.) and discuss my own experiences with those that apply. I strongly believe that everyone, no matter how much pain and hurt they’ve experienced, are capable of love. That is not to say that one should not be held accountable for their prejudices and bigotry. Change is not easy, it doesn’t come over night, and requires recognition and accountability and discussion is a key part to creating it. That said, it’s also the reason I created this blog.

After joining a series of different feminist groups online, I was really disturbed but the lack of conversation and the amount of hurt being expressed through malicious, hateful posts. To me, hate has no place in feminism(s) (or in any type of group with the goal of equality and change), it isn’t a solution, it is an expression of hurt and ignorance. Hate, however; is not to be confused with confronting a prejudiced person.

I would really appreciate feedback and discussion because that is how I learn and expand my own understanding of other’s views and positions. I welcome your comments.

Sooo… let’s start the Open Dialogue.