This week many OI members chose to be here for the winter retreat and it’s been a great joy to be together with other OI members at this retreat. We just wanted to come and, if you were available, sit with you. If you have something you’d like to say to Order members, we’d love to hear it. If OI members have something to say, they can. If not, it will be a good time where we can sit and smile to each other.

INAUDIBLE, but Thay spoke about the importance of the OI starting a newsletter. Then he went on to talk about sangha building:

THAY: You don’t need to be a leader, but you must be an organizer, coordinator, a sangha builder. That’s the mission, the role, the duty of an OI member. There are those who have received the Five Trainings and those who have not received the Five Trainings. We have to bring them together in the community. If in that group there are good practitioners, we should inspire him or her to be a leader. We should avoid being the leader. That is the best way to do it. We should try to ask one or two to be leaders and those we select should embody the practice and lovingkindness.

When a person asks “This is the second training, have we made an effort to put it into practice during the last two weeks?” the one who asks the questions should be the one respected by the rest. Our speaker, our spokesperson, our OI member should be skillful. Just invite these people to do things. You can be a good sangha builder without being the leader. In the monastic sangha there are brothers and sisters who are very important they don’t have to be an abbot or abbess or dharma teacher. There are those who do not have the title of dharma teacher, but they do really well. I’m sure that this is an opportunity for learning the practice. We all make mistakes. We learn from them. The flourishing, the happiness of the sangha is a very obvious fruit of our practice. I think in our area there should be a day of happiness every two weeks. If you want to be a real element of the fourfold sangha, you must be honorable. If you have monks and nuns living nearby, that is good. If not, you must be honorable as a sangha. Essential for sangha is harmony. It’s easier with a group this size than with a monastic sangha of 250. When several hundred people stay together it is hard, but it is possible.

ASPIRANT: wanting an email connection with other members, was told that one was in place.

OI MEMBER: I think it’s important when people are starting a sangha, even when they are brand new, I have this idea, I think it would be cool if they could have a person who is paired with them because it can be very challenging. It can be done without that. It can build your strength. I know from personal experience.

THAY: It is most crucial. The sangha which meets every two weeks should have a very complete practice. The practice should be able to build brotherhood and sisterhood and joy. If there is some difficulty in a relationship between two members, we know how to help to resolve it before we can start our recitation. Before we start the recitation of the Five Trainings you ask the question, “Is there harmony in the community?” and if someone says, “No, there is not harmony,” you have no right to recite. That’s why the time and place for the recitation should be announced in advance. If a number of people decide without telling everyone, that is a transgression of the precepts. So it is very important that everyone knows where will be the place for the recitation and when. Then you can do sitting or walking first. When the time comes, after some chanting, the convener asks, “Has the sangha assembled?” Then the other person says, “Yes, the sangha has assembled.” Then the second question, “Is there harmony in the community?” The spokesperson should honestly say, “Yes, there is harmony in the community.” Then the third question, “Is anyone absent that has asked to be represented and has expressed that they have kept the Five Trainings?” Then they should allow the people to say “Yes, sangha member so and so could not come to the recitation. She has asked me, brother so and so to represent her. She has practiced the precepts well.” Then she will be represented. Those in the sangha can make some decisions and she cannot say “I wasn’t there, I do not like the decision.” She asked someone to represent her. That is the practice recommended by the Buddha two thousand five hundred years ago. It has been like that ever since. If you follow that kind of structure you can do it yourself. There are many things you can learn from the monastic tradition. During the old time, only the monastics would practice walking meditation and things like that. These practices now are being shared. So the monastic culture is being shared. This is a new step. The Buddha would be very happy.

This way of organizing the sangha is very important. Still in many other cultures, people have to come to the temple to have the monks recite the Trainings. But now we can be on our own. We can ask a sangha member to read the ceremony and preside over the recitation ceremony. Of course, from time to time we might like to invite the monastics to be with us especially if we have not mastered the techniques of the practice. But that is a way that can make the sangha strong and you’ll be contributing a lot to the fourfold sangha. Because if the lay community practices well and happily, the monastic sangha profits a lot. You know that in the Pratimoksha, the monastics are not supposed to go to the internet alone. It’s dangerous. It’s like going to the market alone. You have to go with a second body for your own protection. It does not limit our freedom. It protects our freedom, guards our freedom because it is safer.

We want to guard our freedom. That is why we practice. Now you can read and study the Pratimoksha, the monastic code. You can now recognize the difference between good monks and monks that are not so good. When you can look at monks with those kinds of eyes you will be better able to support them.

OI MEMBER: Dear Sangha, the sanghas in which I practice are all very new practitioners. No one has taken the Five Trainings. They know this sangha through me. I’m trying to grow them so can take that step. But they are so unaware of the larger sangha.. How can I introduce them in such a way so it is not my voice but the sangha speaking?

THAY: It is nice to create an opportunity where they can come to a retreat and be in touch with the larger sangha who have practiced many years. It will inspire them. There are those who are new to the practice who don’t have a lot of prejudices. That is a positive aspect of it. It is very easy to plant good seeds. If they already have ideas and prejudices it is very difficult. It is like new soil and new land and you can plant very good seeds. Although they have not received the Five Trainings they can understand, they can recite them. They have not formally received them, but they have received with their hearts and can practice as well as other people. You can bring videotapes to show them. Although the video cannot replace reality, it can be helpful.

OI MEMBER: Dear Thay, We’re trying to strengthen our sangha. We have a lot of skilled people in social activism. I wonder how you and the monastics make a decision as to how to initiate that practice and stay within the boundaries of the Fourteen Trainings? How, for example, is information shared about some injustice that is in the community that we could, as the sangha, address in someway. How does that decision get made or how do you decide where to go with the issues before you that one or two monks feel very heartfelt about?

THAY:I think the basic thing is to have a solid sangha first. If there is not love and understanding in the sangha you should not engage in work outside. If you have something solid, you can share. But before you have something, you have to practice. On the ground of a happy and solid community you can do many things. If we engage in too much work outside, we will lose ourselves. If there is no harmony or happiness in the sangha, the work is not meaningful anymore, and we are very aware of that. That is why we focus on sangha building first. Because when you are solid and you are happy, people begin to be happy already. Even if you have not done much, anything you say or do will have an effect. Even if you do little or say little it will have a more of an effect than f you do a lot but have no happiness inside.

OI MEMBER Dear Thay, we know that the circumstances that brought you to us, to work with us in the West were not pleasant. We just want you to know that we are very, very grateful. We love you, Thay.

THAY: You know that many Vietnamese had become boat people and many of them died. I intended to go to the West for only three months to call for peace. Before I left the chief of police said, “When you go there, don’t call for peace.” I was silent because that was exactly what I wanted to do. I did not say yes, but I stayed silent. It has been 38 years. It was not my intention to come and share Buddhism in the West. It is like the Buddha and the Patriarchs arranged it. I had to obey.

Every time I touch the earth I open my two hands and I say, “ Dear Buddha and dear Patriarchs, I have nothing at all in my hands. The little wisdom I have, you gave me. I am only your instrument.” And I feel very light and very free. I am not caught in pride and arrogance. I am very free a lot of light. I always do that when I touch the earth. That is why I can keep my humility, my freedom, my lightness. I think my friends would like to do that also. That way you can help the Buddha and the Patriarchs to help many people. I think my students, many of them, know that.

Without the Patriarchs and the Sangha, we cannot do much. It’s like Deer Park. It was not my intention to have the Deer Park at all. In fact, when I first heard of it, I was not happy. I did not want to come and look at the land here. I was not interested. But, finally, I came. I think I had to obey the decision made by our ancestors. And when you surrender to that kind of arrangement, you don’t have to struggle. You don’t have to fight to succeed. If conditions are sufficient that is realized. If conditions are not sufficient you are not unhappy about it. You can keep your heart calm. You don’t have to fight; you don’t have to be in despair. When I heard that the area around here was burning, I was in France. They said Deer Park could burn also. I said, “Well, it depends on the Patriarchs also. If they take care of it, they take care of it. If it burns, we practice elsewhere.” We shouldn’t make it a cow.

SISTER: One last question. We need to go to dinner.

THAY: We want to stay until midnight. (laughing)

OI MEMBER: As we go back to our Sanghas is there any message you want us to take back?

THAY: Yes. A happy sangha is the greatest gift you can give Thay for the Buddha also. Sangha building is wonderful. If you are free and happy you can build a sangha.

OI MEMBER: I have been sharing practice with some women in a prison in Connecticut. This weekend they are having a retreat. I just wanted to ask you to send them metta and support. They know where I am. It’s the first time it’s ever been done.

THAY: I often think of the administrators of the prison because they also suffer. If they suffer less, the people inside suffer less. That’s why it’s important to find a way to help them suffer less. If they have more compassion in themselves then the people inside will profit. There must be ways to do so.

OI MEMBER: The man who is the head of this program who works inside the prison, wants to do that.

THAY: Imagine prison guards teaching prisoners to do walking meditation. It would make the Buddha very happy. That would make that a house of love and transformation. Are we allowed to hope like that? It’s possible. Write an article. Speak to them and you are a bodhisattva taking care of those people who suffer there. Give them a chance to suffer less and transform.

THAY: We had a difficult retreat in Madison for police officers. It was wonderful. We learned a lot. Imagine police officers doing like this(bowing), doing walking meditation, breathing in and out. They received the Five Trainings and the Three Refuges in a nonsectarian way. We offered them without Buddhist terms. The text is available. We asked them to put it in the Mindfulness Bell. The form is universal.

OI MEMBER: I wanted to add A City University law school, working with public interest attorneys has started a contemplative program and had asked me to start the meditation program there. We started on Sept. 10,2001, the week of September 11 in New York City. So it was very powerful and I felt that many causes and conditions had come together to bring us there. To work with the people who are choosing to go in with very deep intention and commitment. There are people of color. Many are adult learners. Many are formerly homeless or even illegal immigrants and have chosen to go in and learn the law so they can go back to their communities and serve them. So their intention is very strong. Their compassion is very strong. They need a great deal of support and what you just shared, Thay, about finding ways to bring the practice in a nonsectarian way is so crucial. They are very hungry for the practice. They love the precepts. They love the practice. They are struggling with a great deal of facing suffering each day. So building the strength of that sangha is a great hope. It has given me a great deal of nourishment. I think it also demonstrates the causes and conditions that are beginning to come together in many areas in the law and justice in this country.

Meeting ends

THAY: I will see you for the walking meditation. We’ll walk in the full moon.

TNH: I was thinking of the Tiep Hien Order without a leader. It is like a bee hive without a leader. This is possible. There is no elder. We do not need an elder in order to give orders. We can operate like the neurons in the brain or the ants in the ant hill. It is perfectly possible, provided we have a very good network of communication. If we have good communication, that is enough. The bees they have their way to communicate. The ants also. We have many more facilities. If communication is there, then any group of brothers or sisters can start a project. And everyone will observe them and everyone will come and help, just like the termites the termites: when they see something going on, they are excited, they communicate more, they come, and they help build the colonies. This is possible. It is a very exciting kind of perspective. In the past we elected a leadership, but I dont think that we need it. We need something like a coordinating committee in order to get the information to flow, back and forth. And anyone in the order profits from the wisdom of everyone. And everyone can learn from the mistake of everyone. Therefore, anything can be helpful.

So, communication is the key word. Email is one of the means. I think if a member of the order lives beautifully, if her practice of trainings is perfect, is she can build a beautiful sangha, create greater happiness, that is also communication. Because very soon people become aware of that. Communicates very far. Very quickly. She may not need an email address. Because you cannot hide anything from anyone. Whether that is positive or negative. That is the very sense of community, of sangha. If you are happy, people know that you are happy. If you are not, people know that you are not. Our principle is that when you are happy then you have something to share. But if you are not happy, you cannot share much.

About twenty years ago a person from England came and asked Thay, Thay, when do you think a person is ready to be a teacher? That person came from Western Friends of the Buddhist Order. Thay said, Well, when one is happy. He was very surprised. He thought that Thay would say: You have to undergo five years of training, and graduate, and things like that, but Thay just said, When you feel happy.

Organizing is not the most important thing. The Vatican is very well organized. Over organized. There is a lot of suffering. I think Buddhism is the least organized religion in the world. That is why we have so much freedom. No one can excommunicate us. There is only one person that can excommunicate us, that is ourselves. So let us learn to see things in that light. Organizing is not the most important thing. To be there, practicing, and to be open for communication to fluid, to be possible, is very important. I think we can learn very much from the bees. The bees can dance. We can dance also. Communicate. Anyone can dance for us.

Can you organize a twenty one day retreat in America without the physical presence of Thay. Why not. A twenty one day retreat is much deeper. It is very difficult to give a five, six day retreat because you have to offer the basic teachings always, you dont have time to go deeper in other directions. But in a twentyone day retreat it is very nice. You have enough place to dig deeper. I think very soon we have to organize a retreat for scientists. And we have to resume retreats for children, for school teachers, for parents, for politicians.

In Australia, you can organize a twentyone day retreat.

On the last day of our twentyone day retreat, we will be chanting the name of Avalokita for expressing our gratitude. All members of the Order of Interbeing come up for the chanting. We have to rehearse a little today.

[Half hour rehearsal occurs.]

In Germany we have the Intersein center which is a very beautiful place. A little more than two hours from Prague and Munich. Plenty of fresh air, or woods, or paths for walking meditation. Many rooms for permanent residents and guests. There are now five community residents. The community has reached minimum community size. Our friends Karl and Helga are very careful in accepting new members. Because it is very easy to accept a new member, but not so easy to ask him or her to leave. Because when the practice is not good enough, then the quality of the community will go down. That is why it is very important for the Sangha to have enough time to recognize that this is a member that can contribute to the quality of being of the practice, because the Sangha is a refuge for many people. If we are not careful, it will be very difficult. So in the beginning we should only invite those who have the capacity of practicing and living in harmony together. A person who would like to become a permanent member in the Sangha should allow time for the Sangha to observe and to say yes. Sometimes only a month or two. Sometimes they have to try for six months in order to get a yes. Sometimes longer. That is our experience.

And sometimes we dont need such a person to ask for the status of permanent residency, because we see that if such a person becomes a member of the permanent Sangha, then that would be a plus so we just invite him or her. Please release your cows and come and stay with us. If you have a happy Sangha, you can help a lot. You have something to take refuge in to protect us and also to serve many people.

In Germany there is an opportunity and we are going to have a day of mindfulness later this month. There will be 600 people coming for a day of mindfulness. This is an opportunity to introduce the center to people. An opportunity for people to look and realize that this is a place for practice and not a boutique selling retreats. What we try to avoid is a boutique selling retreats run by a couple. Living like that is no community and that couple has no chance to practice. In a retreat is not real practice. When you are taking care of the retreat, you want to make the retreat a success it is like business. Retreat business. Only by living together according to the six togethernesses, the six concords, that we can get the transformation. Everyone has the same problem. When we come together like a group like this, we will experience difficulties because we are not used to being in community. So we collide with each other. We make each other suffer. But that is the only way to polish everyone. And suddenly we become smooth and beautiful and shining. It is like when you wash a bunch of chop sticks. You have to wrap all the sticks together, then afterwards every stick is clean and shining. That is Sangha life.

In the beginning you ask: Why have I come here. At home I had a lot of comfort. Nobody pushed me like that and you are tempted to go home. But you have made a commitment. What you are seeking for is not comfort, it is transformation. So you go on and accept the Sangha. And there you develop brotherhood, sisterhood, which is very rewarding. And when brotherhood, sisterhood is there, harmony is there, you become a refuge for so many people. You are now doing the work of the Buddha. And therefore it is the Order of Interbeing that has to take the responsibility of building the first lay Sanghas, lay communities. And Thay has some ideas to propose.

If you are in North America, then do some research, some observation, of the practice cetners that are not in america. We know in the past there were centers like the Rochester Zen Center, San Francisco Zen Center, Los Angeles Zen Center, the Tibetan Center in Colorado. So there should be a survey, an obseration, in order to see the strengths and weaknesses of every center. For us to learn.

And then there is a lot to learn from the monastic tradtion. Two thousand five hundred yearsof experience. We may like to begin with a sangha a five people really committed to sangha building. This is the real work, the real practice. The quality of the practice in a retreat depends on the quality of living in a sangha. Because this is a real practice, a twentyfour hour a day practice. And when they come as guests they see us living with each in harmony and happiness. They see our way of treating each other, looking after each other, they know, they have confidence. We know that Buddhism in the west begins by being lay buddhism. Many people think that they dont need monastics. Insight Meditation Society and other places think that it can be entirely lay practice. But many of us have experience that monastic communities are also very important. They serve as the base, the roots. And although the lay sanghas can be autonomous, independent, yet they have to relate to the monastic sangha. Becaue the tradition has always been like that. It is like the biksunni order always relies on the bhikshu order. The lay communities should rely on the bhiksunni and bhikshu orders. We dont need a lot of monastic communities, but we do need many lay communities to offer people an opportunity to see the living dharma. Because there are a lot of books and tapes and lectures they need to see the living dharma. There are many of us who are talented in creating a place. There are many of us who would like to devote our lives to building a sangha. So to have a lay sangha a little bit here is something we can offer to society. Because there is a real vacuum. As members of the Order of Interbeing I think we have to take the initiative. We make a study, we observe, the existing communities to see what we can learn from them and what we can avoid.

Our lay communities can always welcome the visit of monastics. There may be a place for monastic guests. It is like in a monastic community there is a place for those who come and visit. And we keep in touch. It is very important to look into. Monastic tradition translated into lay experience, lay culture. That is a part of engaged buddhsim.

Three sounds of the bell

There is a lot of Dharma talk in the air and there is a lot of air in the Dharma talk.

Today is 22 August 2001 in Deer Park Monastery.

There is a sutra with the title Yasoja – that’s the name of a monk, the Sangha leader. This sutra, Udanakarmad is found in the collection called Udana, Inspired Sayings.

Yasoja was a Sangha leader of a community of monks, about 500. One day he led the 500 monks to the place where the Buddha lived, hoping that they could join the three-month retreat with the Buddha. It was about ten days before the retreat began and they arrived very joyfully, thinking that they would see the Buddha and the other monks. There were lots of greetings, lots of talking and from his hut the Buddha heard the loud noise. He asked Ananda, “What is that noise? It sounds like fishermen landing a catch of fish.” Ananda said that the Venerable Yasoja had come with 500 monks and they were greeting and talking with the resident monks, which was why there was such a great noise.

The Buddha said: “Ask them to come to me.” And when the monks came they touched the earth in front of the Buddha and they sat down. The Buddha said: “You are to go away. You cannot stay with me: you are too noisy. I dismiss you.”

So the 500 monks touched the earth, went around the Buddha and left the monastery of Jeta Park. They went to the kingdom of Vajji, on the east side of Koshala, and it took them many days to reach this territory. When they arrived on the bank of the river Vaggamuda they sat down and then they began to build small huts for their rain retreat. During the ceremony of starting the retreat the Venerable Yasoja said: “The Buddha sent us away out of compassion. You should know that He is expecting us to practise deeply and successfully. That is why he sent us away. It was an expression of his deep love.”

All the monks were able to see that and they agreed that they should practise very seriously during the rain retreat to show the Buddha that they were worthy to be His disciples. So they dwelled quietly and practised very deeply, very ardently, very solidly. After only three months’ retreat the majority of the monks had realised the three enlightenments, the three kinds of achievement. One is about remembering all past lives. The second is to see the lives of human beings as other beings – how they have come and after a time they go – and to see this very clearly. The third realisation is achieved when basic afflictions within the practitioner have ended: no more cravings, anger and ignorance.

One day after the rain retreat the Buddha told Ananda: “When I look towards the east I notice that there is some good energy – the energy of light and goodness – and when I use my concentration I see that the 500 monks that were sent away by me have achieved something very deep.” Ananda said: “That is true Lord, for I have already heard about them. After being dismissed they settled down in the Rajghir territory and began serious practice. Now they have all realised the three realisations.” So the Buddha said: “That’s good. Why don’t we invite them to come over for a visit?”

The 500 monks, when they heard the invitation of the Buddha, were very glad to come and visit Him. After many days of travelling they arrived at about seven o’clock in the evening and found the Buddha sitting quietly. They found out that the Buddha was in a state of concentration called imperturbability. In this state you are not perturbed by anything – you are very free and very solid. Nothing can shake you, including fame, craving, hatred or even hope. When the monks realised that the Buddha was in the state called imperturbability they said: “The Lord is sitting in that state so why don’t we sit like him?” So they all sat down like the Lord, in the Jeta Park, very beautifully, very deeply, very solidly. All of them entered into the state of imperturbability and sat like the Buddha. They sat for a long time. When the night was very advanced and the first watch was finished, the Venerable Ananda came to the Lord and knelt down and said: “Lord, it is already very late in the night. Why don’t you address the monks?”

The Lord did not say anything and they all continued to sit. The second watch of the night had gone by and it was about two or three o’clock in the morning. Again Ananda came, knelt down and said: “The night is very far gone. It is now the end of the second watch. Please address the 500 monks.” But the Buddha kept silent and continued to sit. All the monks continued to sit also.

Finally the third watch of the night passed and the sun began to appear on the horizon. Ananda came for the third time and he knelt in front of the Buddha and said: “Great Teacher, now the night is over why don’t you address the monks?” The Buddha opened his eyes, looked at Ananda and said: “Ananda, you did not know what was going on. That is why you have come and asked me three times. This is what was going on: I was sitting in a state of imperturbability and all the monks sat in that state of being, not disturbed by anything at all. That is the best situation we can have. We don’t need anything else. We don’t need any communication. We don’t need any greetings. We don’t need any talk. It is the most beautiful thing that can happen between teacher and student. We just sat like that, each of us dwelling in a state of peace and solidity and freedom.”

I find that sutra very, very beautiful. The communication between teacher and disciple is perfect. What a student should expect from a teacher is nothing less than the freedom of the teacher. The teacher should be free from craving, free from fear, free from despair. When you come to the temple you should not expect small things like having a cup of tea with the teacher or having him say that you are a good person who has many merits and so on. These things are nothing at all. You should expect from a teacher much more than that. If your teacher has enough freedom, enough peace and enough insight, then that will satisfy you entirely. If he does not have any solidity, any freedom, then he should not be your teacher and you should not accept him or her as your teacher because you’ll get nothing out of him.

As a Dharma teacher or a big brother or sister in the Dharma what do you expect from your students? Again, you should not expect small things. You should not expect him or her to bring you a cup of tea, a good meal, a cake or some words of praise. They are nothing at all. You should expect from your student their transformation, their healing and their freedom.

When teacher and students are like that they are in a perfect state of communication. They don’t have to say anything to each other. They don’t have to do much. They just sit with each other like that, in a state of solidity, imperturbability and that is the most beautiful aspect of a teacher-student relationship.

I have found this sutra very, very beautiful.

A long pause

When a student practises well he can see the teacher in himself, in herself. Likewise when a teacher practises well he can see himself in the student. They should not expect less than that. If you always see the teacher as someone outside of yourself, you have not profited much from your teacher. You have to see that your teacher is in you, in every moment. If you fail to see that, your practice has not gone well at all. So too, if as a teacher you look at your students and do not see yourself in those students, your teaching has not gone very far.

When I look into the person of a disciple, whether she is a monastic or a lay person, I would like to see that my teaching has only one aim – to transmit my insight, my freedom and my joy to my disciples. If I look at her and I see these elements in her eyes, I am very glad. I feel that I have done well in transmitting the best that is in me. Looking at a student disciple’s way of walking, of smiling, of greeting and of being, I can see whether my teaching has been fruitful or not. That is what is called “transmission”.

Transmission isn’t organised by a ceremony with a lot of incense and chanting. Transmission happens every day in a very simple way. If the teacher/student relationship is good, then that transmission is realised in every moment of our daily life. You don’t feel far away from your teacher. You feel that he is, she is, always with you because the teacher outside has become the teacher inside. You know how to look with the eyes of your teacher. You know how to walk with the feet of your teacher. Your teacher is never apart from you. This is not something abstract: it is something that we can see for ourselves. If you look at a monk or a nun or a lay disciple and you see Thay in him, you know that he is a full disciple of Thay. But if you don’t see that, you may be a newly-arrived person who does not have any Thay within himself and is filled with curiosity.

When we look into ourselves, we can see it also – we can see whether our way of walking or smiling or thinking has that element of freedom, of joy, of compassion – and then we know that Thay has been taken into ourselves as a true continuation of our teacher. You don’t need another person to tell you: you can know it by yourself. And when you look at the other fellow you see it by yourself also. If the teacher/student relationship is good, then the transmission is taking place in every moment of daily life.

Every time we take a step we know, by ourselves, whether that step contains peace, joy, solidity or not. You don’t need your teacher to tell you. You know whether your step is a real step, containing solidity and freedom, or not. If your step does not have freedom, you know it doesn’t. If your step doesn’t have the element of solidity, you know it doesn’t. It’s not hard: it’s so obvious.

Your step is like a cup which can be empty and some juice or tea can be poured into it. If there is something in the cup, it is obvious. When there is tea in the cup, you can drink and enjoy it. First I make a step here, a step here, a step here (Thay takes a few steps as he talks). My practice is to fill each step with the element of solidity and peace. For I know very well that every step like that is highly nourishing and healing. When I make a step I say: “I have arrived” or “I am home”. So there is the element of arrival here and you know whether you have arrived or not. You don’t know how to enjoy every step you make because you’ve been running all your life. Now you have become a student of the Buddha, you want to make real steps and every step should be full of the element of arrival, full of the element of here and now, full of the element of stability, solidity and freedom.

In the time of the Buddha there were no aeroplanes, there were no buses, there were no cars. And the Sangha just walked from one country to another country. They spent time in many countries and yet they only walked. They had their way of walking and they were able to enjoy every step they made. The Buddha was a monk and his disciples were monks. They walked together like this from one place to another as travelling monks, stopping only for the three months’ rain. So they had plenty of time to practise walking meditation and wherever they went they inspired people because of their way of walking and sitting. You can arrive fully when you are sitting and when you are walking. You are not in a hurry, you are not looking for something else outside yourself. You know that everything you are looking for is in the here and now and that is why every step you make helps you to arrive in the here and now. That is why the teaching and the practice of arrival is so wonderful, so marvellous.

Our society is characterised by running. Everyone is running, running to the future. You want to assure a good future and since you see other people around you running, you cannot resist running. If you do not have peace you are not capable of being in the here and the now and touching life very deeply. Running like that, you hope to arrive. But running like that has become a habit and you are not able to arrive any more. Your whole life is for running.

In this teaching, in this practice, the point of arrival is not over there. The point of arrival is here in every minute, in every second. Life is a kind of walk: it can be found here, here, here, here and here, in every step. We continue like this (Thay walks slowly). So life can be found in a step and in the space between steps. If we expect to see life outside of these steps and the space between steps, we don’t have life. It is very clear, yet the great majority is running. That is why the practice of arrival is so important. It’s a drastic kind of medicine for healing our society because you carry, in each of you, the whole of society. The whole of society is running, and therefore we are running. So awakening can bring the desire to resist, to stop.

The teaching of the three doors of liberation is crucial: the door of emptiness, the door of signlessness and the door of aimlessness. Aimlessness means that you are not running any more. You are not running after anything at all because what you want to become you already are. What you are searching for is already there in the here and the now. Your peace, your happiness, your solidity, your freedom is available in every step. Aimlessness is your chance to stop. You should not run any more. If you think of gaining peace and freedom, peace and freedom are right here, right now. The belief that peace and freedom is in the other direction is an error. That is why every step you take should bring you to the place where freedom and solidity exist. Freedom and solidity are the ground for true happiness: without solidity, no happiness is possible; without freedom no happiness is possible. Every step can generate stability and solidity. Every step can generate the energy of freedom. If you are walking correctly, then the energy freedom and solidity can be generated in every step and happiness is there, in every step.

Another person looking at you walking is able to see whether your steps have the element of solidity and freedom. The Buddha need not tell you. You don’t need her or him to tell you .You yourself know very well whether the step you take has, or has not, the element of solidity. You are walking but you have already arrived, with every step, and walking like that is your daily practice. Arrival is achieved in every step. It would be very nice to send Thay a postcard to say: “Thay, I have arrived.” It is the thing that will make him happy. “I have arrived; I don’t run any more.”

The habit of running has become very strong. It is a collective habit, a collective energy. Mentally you find it normal to run but it is not normal because if you continue to run like that, happiness will not be possible, peace will not be peace. This contributes to the collective suffering and the individual suffering. So it is very important to learn how to stop.

The Buddha and his monks did not have a lot to consume. They did not have a bank account. They did not own big buildings and houses. Each monk was supposed to have only three robes, one begging bowl and one water filter. They travelled around with only these things. The monks and nuns of our time try their best to follow this example.

If you want to become a monk or a nun you should not have a personal bank account. No one at Deer Park has a bank account. No one has a personal car. Even the robes we wear do not belong to us: they belong to the Sangha. If you need a robe, the Sangha will provide you with one but then it still remains a robe of the Sangha. Even your body is not your personal property, it does not belong to you. You have to take care of your body because it is part of the Sangha body. Other monks and nuns have to help take care of your body and you have to allow them to take care of you. They can intervene in the way you eat and drink because your body belongs to the whole Sangha – the Sanghakaya. You don’t own anything at all, including your body, and yet happiness is possible, freedom is possible. Happiness is easier if you don’t own many things. Usually if you don’t own anything you are fearful, you are very afraid, you don’t feel secure. But the practice of a monastic is the opposite: what guarantees your wellbeing is not possessions but the giving away of all possessions.

I remember when Sister Thuc Nghiem, Sister Susan and many other sisters like Emilie became nuns. They took everything from their pockets and they gave it to Thay: 25 cents, the key of their car. To become a nun or a monk you should give up everything: you should not have an apartment or a car or anything. You have to donate everything before you can be accepted as an ordained novice and you are asked not to donate it to the temple where you are to become a monk or a nun but to some other organisation. One day Thay gave an exercise for all the monks and nuns: “Tell me of your daily happiness. Use a sheet of paper and a pencil and write about your daily happiness.” Many of them built up more than two pages. I remember that one of the things that Sister Susan wrote down was: “My happiness is that I don’t have any money any more.” That is true. Before she became a nun she handed over a very large sum of money but she had not had peace. She did not have happiness. She gave away all these things to become a nun and she gained a lot of liberty, a lot of freedom, and that is the foundation of happiness which is why she wrote “My happiness is that I do not have any money any more.” She really felt this happiness.

Three sounds of the bell

Many people believe that practising as a monk is the hardest path … but that is not the case. It is easy to practise as a monk or a nun. First you have entrusted yourself entirely to the Sangha. You don’t have to worry about anything at all – food, shelter, medicine or transportation. Also, everyone around you is practising – practising walking mindfully, enjoying every step. It would be strange if you didn’t do the same. So mentally you are transported by the boat of the Sangha and even if you don’t want to go in the direction of peace and freedom, you go anyway! You have left behind your family – your father, your mother, your friends, your job – in order to become a monk or a nun and your purpose is to gain freedom because you know that true happiness is not really possible without freedom. You aspire deeply to freedom and freedom here means freedom from afflictions.

Of course political freedom is enjoyable but if you not free from your afflictions then political freedom is not worth anything to you. Say you are a refugee who cannot go anywhere you want and it is your deepest desire to have an identity card or passport. You may wait ten, twenty, thirty years and still you don’t get that passport to become free, to go anywhere you want. There are other people who have that passport, that piece of paper, but who don’t feel any happiness and some of these people even commit suicide. Political freedom is enjoyable but if you not free from your afflictions – namely craving, despair, jealousy – suffering will still be there within and around you. That is why the purpose of the practice is to get free … to get free in order for the Kingdom of God to be available to you in the here and now. Get free in order for true life to be possible for you in the here and now … for the pure land of the Buddha to be available to you in the here and now.

Sometimes the pure land of the Buddha and all its marvels seem to be very close. In fact everything in us and around us is a miracle: your eye is a miracle; your heart is a miracle; your body is a miracle; the orange you are eating is a miracle; and the cloud floating in the sky is a miracle. If they do not belong to the Kingdom of God then to what do they belong? From time to time we have the clear impression that the Kingdom is here, is available in our daily life. But since we are running all the time, we do not have the freedom to enjoy it – it is not available to us.

I would say that the Kingdom of God is available to you but you are not available to the Kingdom of God. That is why we need to learn to live, to walk, in such a way that we become a free person. That is the meaning of all the practice.

To practise is not to become a Dharma teacher: a Dharma teacher is nothing at all. It does not mean to become a Sangha leader: to be a Sangha leader does not mean anything at all. What is the use of being the head of the big temple if you continue to suffer deeply? The purpose of practice is to become free and with your freedom, happiness is possible. With your freedom and happiness, you can help so many people for you have something to share, to offer to them. You don’t share your ideas; you don’t share what you have accumulated from your Buddhist studies. Even professors of Buddhism may suffer very deeply because Buddhist ideas have not helped them at all. What you need is freedom and, whereas Buddhist studies may be helpful, our happiness is the accumulation of peace, including what we study and the authority we are given in the Sangha and in society. Many people in our society are not truly happy and many of them commit suicide. Our way should be different: it is the way of freedom.

Is it possible to be free? Looking into the person of a practitioner, whether a Dharma brother, a Dharma sister or your teacher, you can see how much freedom he has, how much freedom and happiness she has. We would like to have true Dharma brothers and sisters because sitting close to them, living close to them, we profit from their happiness and freedom because their happiness is based on their freedom and not on anything else, like change, authority, power. What we profit from in a Sangha is the opportunity to do what the other people are doing, namely sitting, walking, smiling, greeting – all of these aimed at gaining freedom, at stopping.

What is the meaning of wearing a brown jacket? It’s not to declare that I am an ordained member of the Order. That’s nothing. It’s like the value of a student identity card: you got into a famous university and you were given a student identity card but if you don’t study, what is the use of having the identity card? Having the ID is about making use of the library, sitting in the classroom and having professors and the means to study. So, when you are ordained, you receive the fourteen mindfulness trainings and get the jacket. These are identity cards which allow us to profit from the Sangha, from the teaching, from the practice.

There are Dharma centres, there are monasteries, there are teachers, there are Dharma brothers and sisters who practise and being a member of the Order of Interbeing helps us to profit from all of these in order to advance on our path of freedom. With enough freedom we can make others around us happy. We know that practising without a Sangha is difficult so we try our best to set up a Sangha around us, where we live. To be an OI member is wonderful . To be a Dharma teacher is wonderful. Wonderful, not because we have the title of OI membership, or of Dharma teacher, but because we have the chance to practice and to organise.

As an OI member you have to organise the practice. Wherever you are it is your duty to set up a group of people to practise, otherwise it does not mean anything to be an OI member. An OI member is expected to organise the practice in his or her area – for five people, six people, ten people, twenty people – and to practise very reliably, at a local level and sometimes at a national level. You have to take care of the Sangha and support the Sangha because the Sangha is what supports you in your practice. So building the Sangha means building yourself. If the Sangha is there, you practise with the Sangha so as a Sangha-builder you enjoy the benefit, the opportunity to practise.

Being a Dharma teacher is also an opportunity to practise – you cannot not practise! You need to practise in order that your teaching has content. How can you open your mouth and give the teaching if you don’t do it yourself? The teaching is an opportunity: even if you are not an excellent teacher yet, being a Dharma teacher helps very much when you speak about the Dharma, for you have to do what you are sharing, otherwise it looks odd. It’s like a monk living with other monks: when everyone is doing walking meditation it would look strange if that monk did not do the practice. So, as a Dharma teacher, you have a great opportunity to practise.

Every member of the Sangha can be create favourable conditions for you, whether that member is good at the practice or not. A person who has a strong practice may inspire you to be at least like him or her and another person who is very weak in the practice may draw you to help them. So being a Dharma teacher is a good thing.

It would be strange if you got the transmission and you got a jacket and you didn’t build the Sangha to practise with. It would be exactly like getting a student ID and never going to the library or the classes, saying: “You know I am a student of that famous university.” So Sangha building is what we do and Sangha building is our practice. Sangha building means to identify elements of the Sangha and to invite and help each element of the Sangha to join the practice. You are like a gardener: you take care of, you help the growth of, every member of the Sangha. There will be members who are very easy to be with and to deal with and there will be members who are difficult to be with and to deal with but as a Sangha builder you have to help everyone. There will be members of the Sangha whose presence you can enjoy deeply. There will be other members of the Sangha with whom you have to be very patient.

Please don’t believe that every monastic or lay person in Plum Village is equally easy for Thay! That’s not the case. There are monastics that are very easy to be with and to help and there are monastics who are so difficult. But a teacher has to spend more time and energy with those who are difficult. You may find you get angry and you want to say “no” to these difficult elements. But that is to surrender. You cannot grow into a good Dharma teacher if you want only the easy things. In a Sangha there must be difficult people and that is normal. The difficult people are a good thing for you for they will test your capacity for Sangha building and practising.

One day you will be able to smile and you won’t suffer at all when that person says something unpleasant to you. Your compassion will have been born and you will be capable of embracing him or her within your compassion and your understanding. Then you will know that your practice has grown and you should feel delighted to be able to see that such a sentence, such an act, no longer makes you angry because you have developed enough compassion and understanding. So that is why we must not be tempted to eliminate the element whom we think to be difficult in the Sangha.

Sangha building needs a lot of love and compassion. If you know how to handle difficult moments, you will grow as a Sangha builder and you will grow as a Dharma teacher. Thay, speaking to you out of his own experience, can say that he has developed a lot more patience and compassion and that his happiness is very much greater because he has more patience and compassion. You should believe Thay in these respects. We suffer because our understanding and compassion are not great enough to embrace the difficult people. But with the practice, your heart will grow, your understanding and compassion will grow and you will not suffer any more. You will have a lot of space and you will give others a lot of time and space in order to transform. Thanks to the Sangha practising, thanks to your model of practice, those you found difficult will transform. That is a great success, much greater than with pleasant people. Love is not only enjoyment – we enjoy the presence of pleasant people. Love is a practice of generating more compassion and understanding. You must always remember that love is not just a matter of enjoyment. Love is a practice. And it is that aspect of love that can bring you growth and happiness – the greatest happiness.

There is no way to happiness; happiness is the way. Happiness should be found in every moment of your daily life and not at the end of the road. The end of the road is the stopping because life is now, in every second, in every moment. Peace is every step; happiness is every step. It is so clear; it’s so plain; it’s so simple.

Suppose I draw a circle representing my root Sangha where I was ordained in the Fourteen Mindfulness Trainings, where I had a teacher and many Dharma brothers and sisters. I was born of that place. The root Sangha is my spiritual birthplace and every time I think of it I should feel joy, pure joy and hope. Every time I think of it I feel inspired; I feel happiness. All of us should have such a place which we carry around within us, everywhere we go. That place is situated not just in space: it is internal within us. Those of us who do not carry such a place in our hearts do not have enough happiness. It is a pleasure to go back to the root Sangha and to be there. Because I have my function, my role in society, I am here. I am here but I hold my root Sangha within my heart, as a source of inspiration, a source of energy for me.

Around me I have built a local Sangha. I am aware that, although it is my local Sangha, it will be the root Sangha of many other people. Whether it is in Chicago, in Buffalo or somewhere else, my local Sangha will become the root Sangha for friends who come here to learn the practice. So the root Sangha is not out there: it is here in me. The seat of my root Sangha in me will help make this local Sangha into a root Sangha for others. I am a member of the OI. I have to make it into a home for those of my friends who constitute my Sangha here and my Sangha here reflects the image of my root Sangha there.

In my Sangha people know how to enjoy every step, every breath. They know how to take care of each other. They know that the purpose of the practice is to get freedom and nothing else. I build my Sangha out of love, out of my deepest desire. That is the path I undertake, the path of freedom, and I devote my time, my energy, into building the Sangha whereby the root becomes a reality. If brotherhood is not there happiness cannot be possible. The mark of an authentic Sangha is the brotherhood. Those who come to the Sangha do so not to become proficient in the Sangha but because they want to have brothers and sisters in the practice of freedom. If the practice is correct, then the brotherhood should be built and should be strong. It is that brotherhood which sustains us, to help us stand firm in our practice.

We know that a little further away there is another local Sangha and there is another OI member who is doing just what we are doing here. So, weekly, we practise with our local Sangha. We organise local events – days of mindfulness, short retreats, Dharma discussion, tea meditation, walking meditation – all at a local level. From time to time we invite other Sanghas to join us to make it into a regional activity.

So we have the local and then the regional level. And of course we combine our talents and experience with other OI members, with other Sangha-builders, to make the regional events. Everyone can contribute and everyone can learn a lot from activities on the regional level.

Then from time to time we organise, together with our root Sangha, national activities on a national level. You might use places like Deer Park, the Green Mountain Dharma Centre or Plum Village for your national activity. Finally there will be activities on an international level. Then we might meet with practitioners from Sidney, from Denmark, from Germany, from England and we can learn a lot from each others’ practice and experiences.

So there are four levels of practice: local, regional, national and international. Happiness should be possible at a local level, in our daily practice. We recognise and we take into account the difficulties, the suffering that is going on in and around us. Our practice is just to deal with what is … because the practice is not to get away from our real problems, our real difficulties, our real suffering. The practice, according to the path shown by the Buddha, is to recognise suffering as it is; to call it by its true name; and to learn the Dharma in such a way that the Dharma should be able to ease the deep causes of suffering, always. The division in families, the violence in schools and in society – all these have to be confronted with our mindfulness in order for us to see deeply the nature of suffering, how suffering has arisen, the making of suffering.

Illbeing, that is the first noble truth. The second noble truth is the making of illbeing. We should develop a deep and very clear understanding of the making of illbeing. We have to consider every cause that has led to the suffering – things like alcoholism and drugs, AIDS, violence, the breaking up of families. We have to look deeply into suffering to see exactly what are the causes. We have to call these by their true names. Understanding the nature of suffering is the practice – it is the second noble truth. When understanding of the second noble truth is deep, then naturally the path will emerge: the fourth noble truth – the path leading to the cessation of illbeing. This is the same as the birth of wellbeing. So with understanding of the nature of illbeing, the path leading to the cessation of illbeing becomes apparent. The third truth is just the cessation of illbeing.

It has been repeated and repeated that once the second noble truth is understood then the fourth noble truth will reveal itself. That is the true Dharma. The true Dharma should be embodied by the Sangha leader, by the OI member. You have to organise your daily life in such a way that that way of life can express the fourth noble truth – the path, the living Dharma.

It will bring great happiness if someone in the Sangha can embody the living Dharma. Your Sangha may be five people, ten people, twenty people, fifty people. If one of you can embody clearly the path, the living Dharma, that is wonderful. Then everyone can look to him, can look to her, in order to practise. Very soon the Sangha will carry the Dharma within itself; the Sangha will embody the Dharma. Once this happens, the Sangha will have become that most convincing element, the true Sangha, the living Sangha – the Buddha and the Dharma being contained within it. A true Sangha always carries within herself the true Buddha and the true Dharma.

So, if you are a Sangha-builder, be sure that in the Sangha there are those that can embody the living Dharma. They live in such a way as to make the Dharma apparent – the Dharma not only in cassette tapes, books and Dharma talks but the Dharma in the way they live their daily life.

So when considering training, OI members should remember that training does not mean taking in a lot of Buddhist studies, although Buddhist studies can be very helpful. We are looking for something more than Buddhist studies. At the Green Mountain Dharma Center, Sister Annabel offers teaching and training for OI members and for those who practice in mindfulness centers. She doesn’t just offer Dharma talks. People go there and practise walking and sitting and other practices so they see that the living Dharma is more than a set of theories.

We can organise training on a local or regional level so that OI members can learn, can be trained. Members-to-be can be offered a chance to learn also because after practising for one year a person might like to apply for ordination to become a member of the Core Community. If during that period of one year he or she has had no chance to train, then ordination would not be possible because it is based of the training and not on the desire to become a member of the Core Community alone. The desire is good but it is not enough. There should be training. So if you are a member of the Core Community, it is your path to train people in your local Sangha so that he or she knows what is the true Dharma, the practice and how to apply the Dharma in their family life and in social life. So the Dharma should be a very concrete way of life – the art of mindful living.

Many of you have met to talk about how to organise a regional event. This might be a gathering of seven or ten days for regional-level OI members and aspirants for ordination to come and receive training. You might ask one, two or three sisters from the root Sangha to come and help you. Or you might do it yourselves because among you there are OI members who are Dharma teachers, who are capable of training.

It is always possible to invite a few members of the root Sangha to come and help you and, of course, on a national level the root Sangha has to be involved in some way. There should be documents and materials to ensure that the training is done in very concrete terms so that during the training transformation can really become possible. In principle, OI members should be able to benefit in this way: to transform and heal during the time of training.

In any five-day, six-day retreat we see a lot of people transform – like the one we just offered at the University of Massachusetts when 850 people came for a retreat of six days. The quality of the retreat was very high and people enjoyed it so much. Reports on transformation came every day – many, many cases. Reconciliation was made among members of the family; reconciliation took place even with people who were not there, by a telephone call. If you had been at the retreat you would have experienced how the presence of those of us who have a solid practice is very helpful to other retreatants. There were at least 70 monastics at this retreat, which is quite a large number. Many OI members attended as well as other experienced practitioners. Then again there were so many people new to the practice who had just read books and came to a retreat for the first time with no experience of practice, of vipassana or anything at all. They simply took part and enjoyed it very naturally – like a stream joining a big river. They are very happy and from many streams of society and there were plenty of young people – about 28 young people took the three refuges. If you talk to people such as the sisters and brothers who attended the retreat you will hear many stories of transformation, and these make us very happy.

I remember one day I invited all the children to come to sit on my deck – something like one hundred of them – and I invited all the schoolteachers to come as well – 100 of them. I asked them to talk to each other about their expectations and experiences. It was so wonderful.

Many people cried during the retreat because they heard about their own suffering and they learned the practical way out of suffering. And they got a lot of energy and they got many good seeds in themselves watered. Many of them regretted that the retreat did not last longer.

So, on the regional level we get a training not only for helping other people but to help us also. At the end of a retreat we should come out as a stronger practitioner, a stronger Sangha-builder, a stronger and more skilful Dharma teacher. This should be organised regularly.

So please do use your intelligence, your power of organisation, in order to arrange this because Sangha building is the most noble task. The most precious thing we can offer to our society is Sangha. So everyone has to learn to be a Sangha-builder. There are many monks, nuns and lay people who are excellent Dharma teachers – who can teach Buddhism very well – in Vietnam and in other countries, but not many have the skill of Sangha building.

My fixation, my desire is that every OI Member should learn the art of Sangha building because Sangha building should bring you a lot of happiness. With Sangha building you acquire a lot of merit because what we need desperately in our society is Sangha where people can come and feel embraced and feel understood and learn to see the path of emancipation. A true Sangha is what we need because a true Sangha always carries within itself the Buddha and the living Dharma. It is the living Dharma that makes the Sangha into a true Sangha, a living refuge for us and for our society.

So if you have time left for discussion, please give your attention to the questions of training and Sangha building.

Three sounds of the bell

Guidelines for Dharma Sharing

1. Practice deep listening and loving mindful speech.

Topics emanate from our life and practice. It is best to avoid discussions which are theoretical rather than experiential. Our deepest aspiration is “to learn your (Avalokita’s) way of listening in order to help relieve the suffering in the world”. We can invoke the name of Avalokita before the Dharma sharing begins.

Even though we have the intention to listen deeply our mind will wander. Perhaps we are agreeing, disagreeing, feeling agitated, wanting to respond, drifting, etc. If we are mindful of our thoughts and inner dialogue, we can choose to come back to being present with the person speaking. Many in our Sangha use this as a training to become more attentive listeners for family and friends

Our speech, like our listening, is the fruit of our practice, a response from within. It is good for the atmosphere of the Dharma Sharing when participants take three breaths before speaking, to allow time for the previous person’s speaking to be fully received. Speaking from the heart about topics that emanate from our life and practice includes, speaking with awareness in a way that could be of benefit to others as well as ourselves. For example, speaking with kindness, in a voice that is clear and loud enough for everyone to hear including those with some hearing loss and connecting with others by making eye contact and perhaps smiling from time to time. We all benefit from hearing each other’s insights and direct experience of the practice.

Like the Five Mindfulness Trainings, the Guidelines protect us and offer direction towards the “North Star” of clear and compassionate communication.

2. Bowing

Before speaking we may wish to make a flower bud with our hands and bow. When we bow, or put our hand on our heart or use a signal we are comfortable with, we are signaling that we would like to share. The Sangha bows back acknowledging that we are ready to listen deeply. When we are finished we let the Sangha know by bowing/signaling again. Knowing that we will not be interrupted creates a safe and harmonious environment.

In place of bowing we can use an object, often referred to as “talking stick”, to pass around the circle. The facilitator might introduce this method if the group is very large and/or if the facilitator senses that there are participants who wish to share but are too shy to do so. It may be suggested that folks introduce themselves by name and if a person is inspired to speak, she/he will do so, if not they will pass the object on to the next person. If time allows it is considerate to send the object around a second time so that those who were not ready to speak have another opportunity.

3. Saying our name, each time, before we speak.

This practice fosters a sense of inclusion for newcomers as well as aiding those of us who might have some difficulty remembering names. We do this in our Sangha even when there seems to be only “regulars” present.

4. Avoid giving advice, even if it asked for.

In general it is helpful to always use the word “I” instead of the word “you”. Speaking from our own experience eliminates the opportunity to give advice. If someone asks for advice and a practice that we have worked with comes to mind it is fine to share our experience rather than telling someone what she or he should do.

5. All that arises is confidential, or “What is said here stays here”

Confidentiality secures the safety of the group and helps avoid gossiping. Also, after the Dharma Sharing time, if we want to talk to with someone about what they said in the group, we first ask if it is OK. Sometimes a person does not want to talk more about what they said and this is a respectful way to honor his or her space.

6. Refrain from speaking a second time until it appears that everyone who wants to speak has spoken.

This ensures an opportunity for everyone to speak and provides a space where we can benefit from all of our Sangha wisdom. We are encouraged to speak mindfully, “not too much and not too little” for the number of participants. Near the end of the time the facilitator may offer an opportunity for those who have not spoken to do so if they wish and may address any unanswered questions.

7. Share with the Whole Circle

Whatever we share is for the benefit of all those present. We do not engage in crosstalk with another participant . If we ask a question we ask the whole group and if we answer a question we speak to the whole group and not just the person who asked. If we ask a question we should not expect an answer straight away. Another topic may be addressed first and only when someone feels ready to address the question asked does it need to be addressed. However, if towards the end of the sharing, the question has not been addressed the facilitator can assure the group that the question has not been forgotten.

Image via Wikipedia

The first time I tasted peanut butter cookies, I was at Tassajara Zen Mountain Center in California, and I loved them! I learned that to make peanut butter cookies, you mix the ingredients to prepare the batter, and then you put each cookie onto a cookie sheet using a spoon. I imagined that the moment each cookie leaves the bowl of dough and is placed on the tray it begins to think of itself as separate. You, the creator of the cookies, know better, and you have a lot of compassion for them. You know that they are originally all one, and that even now, the happiness of each cookie is still the happiness of all the other cookies. But they have developed “discriminate perception”, and suddenly they set up barriers between themselves. When you put them in the oven, they begin to talk to each other:

“Get of my way.”
“I want to be in the middle.”
“I am brown and beautiful and you are ugly!”
“Can’t you please spread a little in that direction?”

We have the tendency to behave this way also, and it causes a lot of suffering. If we know how to touch our non-discriminating mind, our happiness and the happiness of others will increase manifold.

We all have the capacity of living with non-discriminating wisdom, but we have to train ourselves to see in that way, to see that the flower is us, the mountain is us, our parents and our children are all us. When we see that everyone and everything belongs to the same stream of life, our suffering will vanish. Non-self is not a doctrine or philosophy. It is an insight that can help us live life more deeply, suffer less, and enjoy life much more. We need to live the insight of non-self.

Tolstoy wrote a story about two enemies. “A” suffered greatly because of “B” and his only motive in life was to eradicate “B”. Every time he heart the name of “B”, every time thought about “B”s image, he became enraged. Then one day “A” visited the hut of a sage. After listening to “A” deeply, the sage offered him a glass of refreshing water, and then he poured the same water onto “A”s head and washed him. When they sat town for tea, the sage told him, “Now you are “B”.”

“A” was astonished!: ”That is the last thing I want to be! I am “A” and he is “B”! There cannot be any connection.” “But you are “B”, whether you believe it or not,” the sage said. Then he brought him a mirror, and sure enough when “A” looked in it, he saw “B”! Every time he moved, “B” in the mirror did exactly the same. The sound of A’s voice became the sound of “B”s. He began to have “B”s feelings and perceptions. “A” tried to come back to himself, but he couldn’t. What a wonderful story!

We should practice so that we can see, Muslims as Hindus and Hindus as Muslims. We should practice so that we can see Israelis as Palestinians and Palestinians as Israelis. We should practice until we can see that each person is us, that we are not separate from others.

This will greatly reduce our suffering. We are like the cookies, thinking we are separate and opposing each, when actually we are all of the same reality. We are what we perceive. This is the teaching of non-self, of interbeing.

SOURCE: The Heart of the Buddha’s Teachings, by Thich Nhat Hanh