kendra may

The Happiest Christmas Tree

noreply@blogger.com (Kendra) — Sat, 23 Dec 2017 04:07:00 +0000

One Christmas when I was about 9, my siblings and I rallied together and wrote a Christmas skit with a thrilling story line surrounding Santa's sleigh - it was too small to fit all the presents in! Whatever was he going to do? Capturing the superb acting and daring theatrical effects, my parents filmed our first stage performance and from that point on every year until I was married we performed a fresh new skit, boasting new characters, themes, settings. Now that my family is spread out and us siblings aren't often together on Christmas, I've carried the tradition on with my little family. We're not quite to the ages yet where the kids can write and memorize lines, so we're sticking with music videos for now. Here is this year's film - I'm the Happiest Christmas Tree.

Beach Camping 2017

noreply@blogger.com (Kendra) — Fri, 30 Jun 2017 23:42:00 +0000

Well I break this 3 year blog silence to debut our beach adventure. This time we had two more kids in tow! Crazy that the last time I blogged Clive wasn't even born yet! IG has dominated my family memories the past few years - much quicker outlet for documentation :)

a report on beach camping with two littles and a 27 week pregnant lady

noreply@blogger.com (Kendra) — Mon, 07 Jul 2014 22:43:00 +0000

I was super duper nervous to go beach camping for 5 days. Taking two kids, one who naps atleast 2 hours during the day and both going to bed at 7:30, plus other factors of eating habits and sun exposure and stuff, it all just sounded like camping was a recipe for tantrums, overtired, sick, whiny, kids. Then, add on me with a watermelon belly I just thought WHY ARE WE DOING THIS? But I already knew the reason why - family reunions and you just have to go to those things, ya know? And I'm so glad we did! The kids did AWESOME!!! Like, completely knocked it out of the park with their awesomeness! They slept through the night, I took Warner back to the trailer for daytime naps, they all played well with their cousins, Ev thrived at the beach and loved the waves - they just killed it and they were awesome for the 5 hour drive there and back!

Probably my favorite part of this whole trip was seeing my kids act all grown up and totally doing things that the big kids do. Not even acting the part, but legitimately doing big kid stuff. Like Warner up there with the parachute - he totally got the concept of holding the parachute and tossing it up and down. And both kids are scooter pros, and were in on the cousin jokes at the table. It was adorable to watch and just made me so proud of them for growing up to be such stellar people!

Every day they had a craft for the kids to do. So cute!

Lots of dirt was involved with this boy! Right when we pulled up to the camp site and got Warner out of the car, he ran to the camp and just ran his fingers deep into the ground, letting the dirt run all through his hands and fingers. Total boy.

The beach was absolutely dreamy every day we were there! I was so impressed with Evelyn's courage in going in to the water! The girl was rolling in the waves! Warner hung back by me and basically had an anxiety attack if he even watched Evelyn walk down to the water, let alone see her get in the ocean! It was kinda sweet - he would clench on to my suit when she got in the waves and whimper out "Eh-when" (evelyn) as he was genuinely concerned for her safety and thought she'd never come back.

Nights were for riding scooters, throwing balls, and eating grub. Warner has three adorable older boy cousins who are so good to him! Cohen was so cute and played catch with Warner for a really long time, and Warner just loved it!

Love these shots of Ev and her cousin, Hunter. They were laughing about something like eating a tree or other nonsense, but they had a good case of the giggles and it was infectious!

Twinners! Ev's new scary face.

And dusk was for smores ;)

Thanks Oakden Family for such a fun trip! Until next year!

Oh, and here are some of Warner's mad scooter skills. He really gravitated to this pink scooter, mostly because it was his perfect size over a razor.

a gosh darn update!

noreply@blogger.com (Kendra) — Sat, 21 Jun 2014 06:40:00 +0000

Well, I have been lovingly scolded by dear friends for not updating the blog, so here I am. I am SO GLAD I AM HERE! I have been wanting to update this part of my life for so long, but the saying "my life has been so busy" really has been true around here and I knew that if I ever sat my bum in this chair with the intent to write, I would have millions of hours of things to spill out, so I never dared click "new post." But Jared is out of town, and finally at 11pm I found some time to sit here and cap what has been going on.

Starting with a timeline of sorts - We found out we are having another BOY!! I am beyond thrilled! This pregnancy has been the sweetest experience with Evelyn and Warner. Ev loooooves talking about the baby. Jared has done a wonderful job at teaching her "life skills" for when the baby comes to make things easier for me - getting dressed by herself, clearing her plate for meal time, buckling herself in to her car seat - stuff like that. She also loves to talk about "the baby" in her tummy. Today on our way to the pool she said "You can take the baby in your tummy and I can take the little tiny baby in my tummy!" "Ev, you don't have a baby in your tummy. You have to get married like me and Dad when you get bigger and then you can have a baby in your tummy," I replied. "Oh," she sadly responded, looking like she was genuinely feeling empty for not carrying a child, "and then I can get taller and a baby can kick me in mine tummy, too?" Both she and Warner are constantly stroking my belly and kissing it. I'm feeling really confident this time around that baby boy will be completely welcomed and loved by his siblings. I am not confident, however, that I will be able to juggle 3 kids. More on my struggle with two kids in another post.

Although we've been here in Sacramento almost 6 months and I'm feeling rather familiary with the city, I still don't feel settled. Most of that has to do with a job opportunity Jared had back in DC. It was a year long hiring process, one we started before we even left Virginia. Jared made it to the final stage, flew out to DC and everything. My in-laws even offered to watch the kids while I flew out with Jared to DC for the interview, but I was so confident that we were going to be back there by the end of the year with this new job that I didn't take them up on it. Then we got the news that Jared wasn't a finalist.... and we both cried. This one was a real stinger. Yes, we have a job now that we are extremely grateful for, but this was our DREAM JOB!! and we were SO CLOSE!!! SO close! It took me a good week to not cry multiple times a day over that disappointment. But oh well, we've moved on and now look forward to staying here in California closer to family. Funny thing, all of the sudden this huge state makes me feel claustrophobic. I always saw our family as a migrant one, living all over the country, even internationally. Now Jared and I both feel exhausted from trying to pursue that route (that route being working for the government as a federal agent, diplomat, analyst), and so California here we are to stay. Virginia is wonderful. I miss the trees, the summer fireflies and crickets humming, our little condo that was oh so beautiful, the culture, the city, the history. I mostly miss our friends. I loved that our friends were just as dear to us as family. I haven't been able to replicate that here, yet. I miss Oak Marr Ward. I miss playgroups and Evelyn having a social life. But I should stop lamenting because life is great, but "don't it always seem to go that you don't know what you got til it's gone?"

The main reason why I have been MIA on here is because of the success I have found in my own little business, Swankaroo. This venture has proved to be AMAZING and I love being a business woman and contributing a good amount to our family's income. It is a tough balance, though, to try and juggle all these roles that I, like most women, are called to carry - mother, wife, cook, launderer, housemaid, accountant, teacher, friend, sister, aunt, Christ's disciple, doctor, and many more. But I do love the creative outlet I get out of Swankaroo. It has been a big blessing.

Sheesh, what other nonsense can I plug this space with? Warner got his first haircut! Beat Ev to that milestone ;) I love having a minivan. I love that Ev loves listening to Vampire Weekend with me, but hate that the Frozen soundtrack is played at least two times daily. Evelyn is swimming like a champ again this summer - so proud of her! She still gets an amazing reaction out of onlookers, and when they ask how old she is and I say three, I always want to follow up with "yeah, but she was totally swimming like that last year at two years old!" Warner is the sweetest brother. He is always thinking of Evelyn. If he gets a snack, he asks for one for Evelyn so he can give it to her - always melts my heart!! He adores her.

So I guess that's enough to fill in the spaces of what's been going on. Nothing extraordinary, but every day I feel like I'm rolling out of bed to hike the longest journey of my life.

Is it tacky to post Easter pics a month late?

noreply@blogger.com (Kendra) — Tue, 13 May 2014 11:00:00 +0000

Better late than never, right? Quickly, we had a great time over Easter with both of our families. While it can be really tough sometimes to juggle activities with both grandparents around holidays, it really is double the fun.

But mostly I want to focus on that last picture there of Evelyn. When did she get so big? And that smile she's putting on there? That's not her usual smile. The first one in this stack of photos is her typical one, but this last one is different. She looks IDENTICAL to her dad when he was little. They have the same eyes and cheeks. She even looks like she has Jared's barrel chest her, which she certainly does not, Miss Petite! It just always strikes me when I see such a resemblance between her and Jared because it reminds me that she is made part of each of us. Literally. She is half me and half Jared. That is mind blowing! I've said it once, and I'll say it again, but I love creating people. The coolest job.

San Francisco

noreply@blogger.com (Kendra) — Mon, 12 May 2014 11:00:00 +0000

Last weekend Jared and I took our first solo trip together since having kids! I have been planning this trip for about 9 months - not our itinerary, but just LET'S GET AWAY WITHOUT THE KIDS PLEASE planning and an opportunity presented itself! While I have been anxious to have some time with just Jared, it was funny how the nights before we were to leave I slept horribly and was so nervous and sad to leave them. I was mostly worried about Warner because he is my baby and he is rather partial to me, and the thought of his mom just up and leaving just broke my heart, but wouldn't you know it the kid did just fine without me! I don't think I ever would have taken this leap of leaving them if my wonderful inlaws weren't so kind to give up 3 days to come spend with Evelyn and Warner. I knew they were in good hands, and once we got in the car to drive to San Francisco I didn't look back ;)

The first stop of our journey was to Alcatraz. The place was much more fascinating than I thought it would be! I really wish I had read up on all the hardcore criminals that were locked up in there before we went. Machine Gun Kelly? The Birdman? Creepy Karpis? Yeah, not so knowledgeable on my gangster trivia. I also had no idea that Alcatraz was home to Native Americans for 18 months during the 60's. Or that families of the guards LIVED on the island. Gasp - give me a heart attack as a mother!! No way would I ever feel like that would be a smart idea to transplant my kids within 200 feet of crazies! But the tour was super interesting... and windy.

Next we decided to walk up the 377 steps up Telegraph Hill to reach Coit Tower. We had heard it was worth the walk with gorgeous homes, fauna, flora, and views of the city. Just about 30 steps in, my pregnant self in tight jeans almost reconsidered the path we were on, but I'm glad I pushed through because it really was amazing and not all that strenuous of a climb.

Next on the list - Pier 39, Fisherman's Warf, and Ghirardelli. I don't think I need to even caption this portion because the pictures do justice to how beautiful the waterfront is.

And then we rode a cable car.. or two.. or three! It truly is a unique way to travel, especially if you catch a super packed car and you are squished in the middle like sardines. Luckily our third time was a charm and we jumped on one where we were on the outer ledge, catching a PERFECT view of the city as we glided up and down the hills.

And what's a trip to San Fran without the Painted Ladies? This was by far disappointing. The houses are totally rundown and in need of desperate restoration. But the homes surrounding Alamo Park are gorgeous! This city has some killer architecture. The Palace of the Fines Arts there below? Stupendous.

This city is truly a gem. I've been to New York, London, Paris, and Rome - those are all grand and have definitely captured my heart. San Fran might be up there on that list. Can someone please write a complimentary song to "Empire State of Mind" for San Fran? "Golden State of Mind.....?" Til' next time!

cosmically orphaned

noreply@blogger.com (Kendra) — Sun, 27 Apr 2014 22:07:00 +0000

I was enriched today during Sacrament Meeting, which is so rare these days, and not because of the message of the speakers but because I am often distracted by two kids climbing off and on my lap, putting together puzzles, making sure one kid doesn't eat the crayons, picking up cheerio snack crumbs, and all other things that come with taking two toddlers to an hour silent meeting. But today Evelyn sat on Jared's lap, and Warner laid his head on my shoulder a good portion of the meeting and I could actually listen. The speaker was wonderful, and gave a very insightful talk on the importance of music in religion, and the sacred nature of which we can offer prayers to God via a hymn. He then gave this quote that just struck me to the bone, which I think is so beautiful and truly puts into words how I often feeling about my God.

"I get impatient with dogma and dictum, but somewhere way inside me and way beyond impatience or indifference there is that insistent, infernal, so help me, sacred singing - All is well, All is well. My own church, inhabited by my own people - I would be cosmically orphaned without it." Emma Lou Thayne

I would be cosmically orphaned without it - that has been ringing in my heart over the past hours. How true that statement is. Last year, if you recall, I had a bit of a tussle with my faith in God. Less than a year later, my heart and circumstance stands in a different place - in a better place, in a more humble place, more grateful, more rejoiceful place. I, too, can find my heart singing "all is well, all is well." I tried putting faith on the backburner for a bit, and I did feel lost. There is nothing worth abandoning God for. Truly without my religion I would be cosmically orphaned, lost in this vast universe without purpose, love, direction, and true joy. God is good.

how reading books on parenting is really loony

noreply@blogger.com (Kendra) — Wed, 16 Apr 2014 14:00:00 +0000

Haha! My bestest friend sent this to me, and I just died with laughter. While I admit to having read a good handful of parenting books, it is pretty funny to look on as an outsider at how loony it is to really expect one method or book to have the answer on how to raise a perfect child ;)

our own magical world, but not disney

noreply@blogger.com (Kendra) — Tue, 15 Apr 2014 21:20:00 +0000

Ok, treadmills really need to tone down their beeping of buttons. You know, when you push incline, speed, weight, WHATEVER, it dings. This causes a lot of anxiety when you are confident doing your thing at your own speed, but then someone comes on the machine next to you and holy cow, starts pushing the crap out of the buttons and all you hear is beep beepbeep beepada beep beep beep beep beep beep, and then you're totally intimidated thinking what type of superstar am I now competing with right next to me?! What's their incline, what level did they choose, am I running faster than them? I hope they look over and see that I've been on here for 20 minutes already, so I totally already did my sprinting at super speed thing, which is why I'm not going turbo right now... and also - i'm pregnant, so, ya know, I can't run that long before my bladder wants to explode. But wait, do I look pregnant or just fat right now? Ahhh, then they start pushing more buttons - what does it all mean!? So then I push buttons and we're all just trying to out ding the other one with our beeping until finally I get off the treadmill and head over to the weights so they can think "wow, she lifts weights, too" :)

Annnnyyywayyy.... We are really enjoying our new city. Sacramento is super family friendly with the most amazing parks! We bought a year pass to Fairytale Town because it is the most charming play place. Having been built in the 1950's, Fairytale Town has this antique-y feel to it, but it has been so well-maintained that it's not run down and creepy but rather magical. It is a gem of a place!

Being the family photographer is a tough position. Looking back at these photos I'm disappointed that these are the only ones I took. They totally don't do the park justice. They have live animals for Little Bo Peep, Three Billy Goats Gruff, Peter Rabbit, and the Three Little Pigs. They have a playground in "Sherwood Forest," a slide and well on "Jack and Jill's Hill," Cinderella's Coach, Jack and the Beanstalk Slide, and Evelyn's favorite - the Crooked Mile, and so much more. But while taking photos, I was also taking video, and trying to be a partaker of the moment and not the mom behind the lens. But here is Fairytale Town documented on the blog to look back on years from now when we reminisce about our time spent there.

uh, what a dull ending. my blogging skills are really rusty...

teenage love dreams and we're having another baby

noreply@blogger.com (kendra may) — Sun, 30 Mar 2014 23:16:00 +0000

The other night I couldn't sleep. I was tossing and turning, which is quite regular for me, unfortunately. A lot of things have been weighing on my mind, namely how to run a small business (which branches off into worrying about the quality of my work - is it worth what people are paying, how to make sure the IRS doesn't come after me, quickening production, hiring employees), attempting to balance running said business and my number one job of being a mom (which branches off into anxiety about how much time I am spending with each one of them everyday, was I on my phone too much around them, did I stimulate their creativity enough, am I too rigid when it comes to discipline, trying to let some things roll off my back, questioning Evelyn's educational level and thinking of a preschool curriculum that will work for for us), to yet again our family's future and Jared's career (yes, Jared was blessed with a great job at the beginning of the year, but some other even greater opportunities have opened up that have us on the fence of what to do), to church callings and feeling like I'm falling short of being a Christ-like example, to lastly just feeling overwhelmed by all this stuff and thinking "will life ever calm down?"

In my tossing I turned to my left side, and my eyes fell upon the other person in my bed who was so calmly sleeping. I laugh every time I watch Jared sleep because he sleeps like a super model, always perfectly positioned with arms up, which make his muscles look like they are flexed, and pouty lips. There is no one who looks better when they sleep than him. Annnywayy, too mushy? I'm in the moment of recounting my exact thoughts, so that all had to be included to set the mood. I was sleeping next to a gorgeous man, which brought a smile to my face, and I felt very lucky. My mind then left all the troubles that it was previously occupied by and drifted back to a summer June night just about 6 years ago. Jared and I had gone out with some friends and it was late into the evening, or I guess early into the morning at that point. Jared was my ride home ( I cleverly planned that one), so we were parked outside my house. We talked for a good 45 minutes in his car, and I thought I had an inkling that he just miiiiight kiss me, so i stayed in there as long as I could until I reached a point where I realized I must have been wrong, unbuckled my seat belt and said I was heading in. As I looked at him and said bye, I just remember him leaping forward and giving me a big smackaroo. My heart felt like it was going to explode and the rest is history.

Imagine this all playing out like a movie scene or something where the screen flashes white and all of the sudden you are brought back to the present moment, because that's just how it happened. I was lying there in bed, having those young love emotions just stirred up in my heart and brought back to the surface, when I was snapped back to real life gazing at this man who I have now built my life's foundation with, thinking how lucky we are to have our story. And how giddy and humorous I find it that we started out as teens and now we have not just one, not just two, but THREE children that are ours. I've put it out there on all my social media outlets but here that i'm pregnant with baby numero tres coming this September! We are excited, albeit, intimidated about the prospect of having three littles three years and younger, but we are feeling rather blessed that this third child will indeed be joining our family. And now child number two is tugging on me, so I guess I'll end here. What was the point of this post? I suppose the most significant thing is to document here that we have a third child on the way, and that I still have gushy teenage feelings for my husband, yet my mind is very consumed with adult things. Sure. That was the point.

2 month catch up!

noreply@blogger.com (Kendra) — Sun, 23 Mar 2014 22:42:00 +0000

Gah, I've clicked over to this space here just about every day since the last post and thought "today will be the day when I update!"... but it never gets done. Life has been SO BUSY lately, and blogging hasn't been on the forefront of my mind, which is so totally weird because I used to live and breathe blogging. Trying to play catch up for the past two months sounds exhausting. Uhhhh, sounds so boring, even though life has been nothing but. My main journaling platform these days has transitioned from this blog to instagram, an instant and brief way of documenting life. Part of what sounds exhausting right now about blogging is that it is a redundancy of what I've been instagraming, but I really need to get back into the swing of writing in this space. I've missed my writing outlet, because heaven knows I have a lot on my mind and heart to share! Since moving to Sacramento, things have gotten rosier for us. Life has taken a turn for the best in all kinds of ways and we are feeling very blessed.

So where to start? Let's just start with what a beautiful day yesterday was since that is fresh on my mind and I just uploaded those pics, k?

The weather yesterday was picture perfect. Not too hot, not too cold, just right in the mild 70's. Not a cloud was in the sky. Evelyn had been asking for some time to go to the beach. Living 2 hours away from the nearest sand bar, it really wasn't quite a quick trip option for us. So on Friday night I looked up some spots along the American River by us. I found something on YELP about Paradise Beach, supposedly this stretch of river bank that you can wade in. The pictures looked convincing enough to pass off as a beach, so we packed up our gear, grabbed the sunscreen for the first time in months, and rolled up to what was a surprisingly beautiful sandy shore. The kids were in heeeeaavveeennnn!

It's crazy that when I look at these pictures, I don't see a baby anywhere in sight. Warner is a full-blown toddler boy who has hair just about as long as his sister :) For yesterday morning, that little river beach lived up to it's name - Paradise.

the magical world

noreply@blogger.com (Kendra) — Tue, 28 Jan 2014 22:57:00 +0000

Last week, just days before we moved, we hit up Disneyland with my family. We had to make it in before Ev turned three so we didn't have to pay for her ticket :) Jared and Warner were supposed to come, but we decided the day before that the two boys would stay home since Warner was breaking in FOUR TEETH and was a crankster. I was sad they wouldn't be there, but once we got to the park I felt fortunate to have this time to show Evelyn the magical world without the distraction of brother. It was sooo nice to just be able to share in that moment with her.

I was so impressed with how well Ev did at the park! It was fun to share in the day with Grandma & Grandpa, Aunt Boo, Aunt Jay and Uncle Luke, and especially baby Shane! I felt like the worst mom for taking Ev on Pirates and Haunted Mansion - she's told me every day since that she doesn't want to do those rides ever again. BUT she totally braved a real rollercoaster TWICE with her stuffed bear, Brownie. Brownie is always a good companion when she does things outside her comfort zone :) We didn't mean any princesses. Ev isn't quite into that yet, although she would have loved to have met Anna and Elsa, but the line for meeting the FROZEN characters was TWO HOURS LONG!! Yep, didn't do that one.

We had such a wonderful time! Thanks Grandma & Grandpa for making it all possible!

job. we got one. and that's a big blessing.

noreply@blogger.com (Kendra) — Mon, 20 Jan 2014 03:57:00 +0000

The blog has been silent, but life has been nothing but. 2013 was a bittersweet year for our family.
We had a lot uncertainty and it was a year of endurance spiritually, financially, and emotionally. As 2013 came to a close, we were hoping to start the new year off on a different foot, but we received some news just before Christmas that threw everything off track again. As January 1st rolled around, I had a pit in my stomach. I couldn't handle another year like we just experienced. My heart was feeling rather hard toward any inclining of the spiritual nature, and everything from my soul to squishy thighs I mentioned here felt unbalanced.

One night two weeks ago I was sitting in my parents garage, hovering over my sewing machine and stitching bags for my shop (I don't think I ever mentioned it here, but I've been crazy busy with my new business Swankaroo! It's been one of the better and more promising parts of 2013), when I listened to a BYU devotional given by Jeffrey Holland, an apostle of Jesus Christ today, entitled "cast not away therefore your confidence." Drawing parallels from Moses' experience on the Mount, and leading the children of Israel across the Red Sea, and then wandering in the wilderness, Holland's message is full of many wonderful insights, but my favorite excerpts are these:

“And Moses said unto the people, Fear ye not, stand still, and see the salvation of the Lord. . . . The Lord shall fight for you.”

In confirmation the great Jehovah said to Moses, “Speak unto the children of Israel, that they go forward” (Exodus 14:13–15; emphasis added)...

After you have gotten the message, after you have paid the price to feel his love and hear the word of the Lord, “go forward.” Don’t fear, don’t vacillate, don’t quibble, don’t whine. You may, like Alma going to Ammonihah, have to find a route that leads an unusual way, but that is exactly what the Lord was doing here for the children of Israel. Nobody had ever crossed the Red Sea this way, but so what? There’s always a first time. With the spirit of revelation, dismiss your fears and wade in with both feet. In the words of Joseph Smith, “Brethren [and, I would add, sisters], shall we not go on in so great a cause? Go forward and not backward. Courage, brethren; and on, on to the victory!”

I wish to encourage every one of you today regarding opposition that so often comes after enlightened decisions have been made, after moments of revelation and conviction have given us a peace and an assurance we thought we would never lose. In his letter to the Hebrews, the Apostle Paul was trying to encourage new members who had just joined the Church, who undoubtedly had had spiritual experiences and had received the pure light of testimony, only to discover that not only had their troubles not ended, but that some of them had only begun....

The reminder is that we cannot sign on for a moment of such eternal significance and everlasting consequence without knowing it will be a fight—a good fight and a winning fight, but a fight nevertheless. Paul said to those who thought a new testimony, a personal conversion, or a spiritual baptismal experience would put them beyond trouble, “Call to remembrance the former days, in which, after ye were illuminated, ye endured a great fight of afflictions” (Hebrews 10:32; emphasis added).
Then came this tremendous counsel:

"Cast not away therefore your confidence, which hath great recompence of reward.
For ye have need of patience, that, after ye have done the will of God, ye might receive the promise. . . .
. . . If any man draw back, my soul shall have no pleasure in him. . . .

. . . We are not of them who draw back unto perdition." [Hebrews 10:35–36, 38–39]

In 40 minutes I was taught how to soften my heart, which I had been attempting to do for a whole year. I felt a huge burden lifted as I just... gave it all over to the Lord. I never fully used or understood Christ's invitation to "take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light" [Matt 11:29-30], but I suppose that is what happened that night. Not that I gave up my concern for our future and became whimiscal about anything, but I just trusted and chose to learn from our experience as much as I could.

Not more than a week later, Jared got a job offer. He got hired on the spot! We will be relocating to Sacramento this weekend! Jared will be the Security Operations Manager for Johnson & Johnson at one of their pharmacutical facilities. We are feeling very humbled, blessed, and excited for this opportunity. We still have some other balls up in the air, but we are feeling the most optimistic we've felt in years. I have learned to "cast not away therefore your confidence, which hath great recompence for reward."

virtual christmas card

noreply@blogger.com (Kendra) — Tue, 24 Dec 2013 05:29:00 +0000

Because I know what you all wanted for Christmas was a photo session of our family :) Thanks so much, Christa, for such beautiful keepsakes!

a haiku for my legs

noreply@blogger.com (Kendra) — Wed, 18 Dec 2013 22:19:00 +0000

Jared and I were talking about haikus the other day, and how we like their simplicity for telling a story. So here I present to you my beautiful prose about the evolution of my thighs.

Skin used to be tight

But now it has turned squishy.

I do not like that.

I can't believe my body is showing signs of aging. I for sure have noticed my metabolism slowing down. My calories are starting to catch up to me, especially now that Warner is weaned. Like, seriously, the texture of my skin has changed from silky seal to.. I don't know, frumpy?? Boy, this sucks...

portraits of an almost 15 month old

noreply@blogger.com (kendra may) — Mon, 16 Dec 2013 12:30:00 +0000

Does this post even NEED words after looking at that gorgeous smile?! Good grief, kid! I feel like I should just leave this post as a pictorial only, but I posted a photo of Warner on instagram the other day and I had a friend comment that she didn't even recognize him because he is SO MUCH BIGGER than when we moved from Virginia! Warner boy is sprouting so quickly from infanthood to toddlerhood. What's with my kids deciding to both grow up so rapidly?! So before he grows another inch over night and turns 15 months on Thursday, let me quickly document Warner at 14 months.

::THINGS YOU LIKE::

:::Electronics! Anything with buttons! You don't limit yourself to just the phone and kindle, oh no, you must touch EVERYTHING with buttons - the garage door opener, the thermostat, portable heater, baby monitor, keyboard, cd player, radio, lightswitches. You are a gadget magnet!

:::Animals. Stuffed or real. You love grandma and grandpa's rabbits! Every morning it is someone's duty to take you out to spy on the bunnies.

:::CHOCOLATE & TREATS & MARSHMALLOWS. You are my child.

:::Playing duck duck goose or chase.

:::Cars. Dirt. Planes. Dirt. Water. Dirt.

:::Brushing your teeth (more like just chewing on your toothbrush)

:::Wrestling. You especially like it when Dad throws you on to the bed in a pile of pillows. You come out giggling and signing for more.

:::Recently you've started a thing for chapstick. You've come up with your own sign for it, and you like putting it on your lips and other people's lips. You do a pretty good job about not eating it, which I can not say the same about your sister.

:::You like to give love. You are so good about spreading happiness wherever you go.

The world is a better place because of you, Warner Bradley!

trim up the tree with Christmas stuff!

noreply@blogger.com (kendra may) — Thu, 12 Dec 2013 16:19:00 +0000

Decorating the tree was a big deal as a kid. We always did it Thanksgiving Day. While my parents cooked the feast, us youngin's broke out the ornaments and created a beautiful masterpiece, that no doubt my mom would come back and re-do later, but we felt it a huge responsibility to be the first to arrange the trinkets on the evergreen.

Since we are staying with my parents this holiday, it was fun to go through boxes of their ornaments and talk about the memories a good handful of them held. While watching Evelyn and Warner decorate the tree I just had this impression that this is going to be the BEST Christmas. They are both old enough to identify with the magic of this holiday (Warner's owl oooOOs at the lights are one of my top ten favorite things), but young enough not to expect anything. Like, every thing is just awesome - no disappointments, no high hopes for presents, no anticipations - just raw in the moment reactions and amazement. It's all pure joy! I am so loving being on the parent side of Christmas :)

portraits of a sickly girl

noreply@blogger.com (kendra may) — Mon, 09 Dec 2013 12:30:00 +0000

Three days ago Evelyn came down with a fever, which was sad, but also wonderful. This girl never EVER cuddles with me. Her vivacious spirit is always on the go, leaving me and my fragile "you're-growing-up-too-fast-please-stay-little" heart always in constant anxiety, forseeing that this fireball independent girl sees little need for mother's craddling. And as if it were a blessing for my aching heart (Evelyn and I had a hard week. I cried often. I was worried about our relationship), she up and got sick and doesn't want me to leave her side. She is so passive, agreeable, peaceful, loving, patient, still, and cuddly. She has been so tender, and it is just what I needed. Not the fever, but to know that she loves me and values me as much as I do her.

Also, she looks serene and beautiful when she is unwell, doesn't she? Portraits of a sickly girl pre-bedtime.

YOLO!

noreply@blogger.com (Kendra) — Thu, 05 Dec 2013 19:14:00 +0000

YOLO!!
Sometimes that little slogan can come in really handy. Like when your toddler is being super defiant, hitting her brother, ignoring all your pleas for obedience so we can avoid disciplinary action, then crying because her shoe fell off but really she's frustrated by all the negative attention she's getting, and I tell her I want to give her loves and kisses but can't when she doesn't listen to me, and she goes into hysteria, and all I can try to do to avoid completely losing it is think "YOLO!" This one life is all I've been given and this is the only time in my life where we'll be in this rearing stage, so just laugh it off. Sometimes that mentality works, sometimes I'd rather just cry pull my hair out.

You know, I can't tell you how many times I've super duper wanted to drop the big bucks on a pair of Google Glass. I think it truly could save my sanity. While I am not fully certain of all that specific technology is capable of, I am 100% certain it is NOT catered toward stay-at-home-mom's like me, but I could be it's biggest proponent with that discrete video recording feature. So many times through out the day when a) we're 10 min late getting to where we need to be, I could just flip that little glass switch and record the potty break we had to take, the running away while trying to get shoes on, scrambling to get snacks together, the melt down in the carseat b) spending 15 minutes getting lunch ready, only to find that today was not the day when Warner wants to eat anything, then spending another 20+ trying to get something into his mouth c) recording myself to see how I sound like a broken record with "Don't hit your brother! Don't push him! Just leave him alone, go find another toy! Don't take that from him! Share, please!" - all that recording could really save my case if I ever have a mental breakdown one day. I'd have proof!

But that sounds awful, and no one wants to hear me complain (although you just did since you read this, but I can't delete it because it's my raw thoughts and I'm being honest. This gig is hard). But I will say there are other spontaneous moments when I wish my eyes could just record tender moments into my brain. Well, they do, I guess, because that would be memories, but I'd like a hard copy video rendered of all the sweet things my eyes spy, too. Like when Evelyn gives Warner a hug and says "I so wuv you, hansome boy!", or when Warner grabs a spatula and with a wide grin charges for my leg, pokes me and says "dah!" and then moves on to poke Dad and says "dah!" and we realize "holy cow! This kid is playing duck duck goose!" and he pokes everyone in the room, or when Evelyn says to me for the first time "Yous look pwetty, Mama", or when I announce we are going to say a prayer and Warner folds his arms ALL BY HIMSELF!!! Now those are the moments when a quick tap of the finger to my Glass would be instrumental to bottling happiness. But for now, they are bottled here on this blog.

I can completely say that I love this gig and just about everything there is to it. If I really disect my frustration, I find a completely deeper than deep layer of love behind it. Everything, EVERYTHING, I do is for the love of this two beautiful babes of mine, even down to the discipline. Now the key to all perpetual happiness would just be for Evelyn to listen to me the FIRST time and for Warner to eat everything on his plate, but hey, I was a kid once and I know that ain't how the game plays out ;)

homesick.

noreply@blogger.com (kendra may) — Mon, 18 Nov 2013 02:43:00 +0000

One of my most darling friends in Virginia just had her first baby the other day. I wish I could be there as she enters this new phase of motherhood. I saw one of my other bestest friends post on facebook that she just ate the most delicious pumpkin pie that my other wonderful friend made, and my heart sunk a bit at the thought that we'd been a part of the annual pre-thanksgiving feast in prior years, and of course the celebration was going to go on without us, but I was sad we weren't there to partake. I still get emails from playgroup, letting me know that everyone is getting together at the park on such and such date, friends congregating without me. My calendar continues to notify me that preschool is going on Wednesdays, and my sweet tooth reminds me that I'm missing Wegman's pumpkin spiced donuts season right now, dagnabit! The closest thing that I've come to in the past months since we've left Virginia to feeling "home" was at my local Trader Joe's when I struck up a conversation with my cashier and I told her we just moved back from the DC area and she said, "Oh, I used to work at the TJ's off Pickett!" My mind was blown because that was my TJ's and we just started talking about the parking lot there, how crazy it is, and I got all nostalgic for that ridiculous shopping strip mall!

Although it has been wonderful to be home with both our families, the more real it becomes that we are not on vacation. That we are not going back home to Virginia. That when Evelyn asks to "go back to Evelyn's house," we can't. That our friends were truly more than just friends, but they were and still are, like unto kin.

I am reminded daily how beautiful it is that humans can impact one another for good - so much good.
My heart carries the markings of so many who have engraven themselves on my life imprint forever with their energy, goodness, comfort, laughter, friendship, and love.

I better log off before I fry my keyboard with my tears.

I'm homesick for you, Virginia.

Southern California

noreply@blogger.com (Kendra) — Wed, 13 Nov 2013 19:25:00 +0000

So I put a 1970's filter on these photos, and isn't it marvelous? Totally gives off an incredible vibe and makes me nostalgic for a life in the past that I never lived because I wasn't even a thought in the 70's but this filter is just plain perfect for Southern California. Moving on...

About a month ago now (ah, I am so far behind on blogging!) we drove down to visit my sister in San Diego for a couple of days. On our way down, we stopped off at the second of our three hometowns, Santa Monica, and were able to meet up with friends we hadn't seen for two years! We picked up right where we left off, and it was fun to see our girls play together. We wished we lived closer, but it was nice to pick up right where we left off and know that any time, any place we can always be besties.

My sister lives in a beauuutiful city, with a beautiful home, and a beautiful family. She just had a baby 4 months ago, and we had to get down and meet baby Shane! Somehow I only took a limited amount of photos during our trip... what is happening to my blogging spirit? Even my camera has been neglected! For shame!

a report from Tink and Pan

noreply@blogger.com (Kendra) — Wed, 06 Nov 2013 17:12:00 +0000

the big fresno fair

noreply@blogger.com (Kendra) — Tue, 29 Oct 2013 12:00:00 +0000

I totally used to knock my hometown, thinking it was kinda unrefined and dull, but I'll say we've been busier the past month than we ever have been and Clovis has kinda bumped up a lot of knotches in my book of coolness. We've really been loving being back! I will say that there is no other fair like the Fresno Fair. Jared and I had been looking forward to it for weeks, well, years kinda if you count the ride "the Zipper." It is such a classic ride, yet over the past 5 years we haven't been able to find it at any of the carnivals we've gone to, so we were soooo happy to see it in operation again!

This fair year was particularly exciting because our niece (only 4!) was competing in the Mutton Busting World Championships! I seriously had no idea that a sheep could be so scary and charge that fast! I was impressed that kids had enough guts to hang on for dear life. I kinda wanna put Evelyn in it when she's old enough.

Yeah, it was a good time. Was I saddened when we left without eating a single fair food, especially fried oreos? Yes. But boy did we have a rockin' time! Thanks Grandma & Grandpa for treating us!

sunday evenings are for rabbit hunting and duck duck goosing. oh, and some swinging, too!

noreply@blogger.com (Kendra) — Mon, 28 Oct 2013 12:00:00 +0000

I sat on a wire chair about 5 feet away from Evelyn as I watched her. She approached Warner, whose legs were dangling motionless, she said "ooooOOHH kay Warner, yous want to go hi-wore? okay, okay." She then ran behind the swing and you would have thought someone was tickling Warner's belly or something the way he started giggling. He did a rapid bounce and excited squirm the minute Evelyn placed her hand on the back of the swing, like some electric bolt of anticipation was running up his back. Warner loves swinging, but he loves it most when his big sister is pushing him. He gets such a rush, and I do too just watching all the energy going on between them. I sat there looking at them, Warner with his big grin, and Evelyn with her grin, too, both of them happy. A bit later they made their way over to the play car together. Evelyn has started calling Warner "handsome boy." Warner crawled over to the back of the car and stood up and began pushing it. "Dood dob (good job) hansome boy, dood dob!" Oh, shot to my heart! I wanted to freeze the two of them right there and just, I don't know, cry from joy? It really is the little things.

And here I break from the tenderness to share with you a triumph of other sorts. If you follow me on instagram, then you saw a couple weeks ago my post about my parents having 2 ginormous hares that roam freely in our backyard. I had caught one of them, but the other had been rather illusive and dodging my attempts at "capture." So I was determined one evening to pet the darn thing, and after an enthralling "hunt" I could declare victory! The kids LLLLOOOOVVEE the bunnies. Like, love. Evelyn gets a good portion of her daily exercise chasing them around the yard all day, and Warner, well, that kid signs bunny the moment we walk downstairs in the morning.

And what evening isn't complete without a game of duck duck goose? Evelyn had never played before, so once she got the hang of it, she was a'chucklin'!

i'm not dead, just 3 weeks behind on blogging!

noreply@blogger.com (Kendra) — Sun, 13 Oct 2013 23:09:00 +0000

Chellooo blogging world! Good grief, I feel like I'm coming back from the dead since I've been absent for a couple weeks now. This has never happened to me before, the feeling of "oh I'm so far behind in blogging how will I ever catch up I think I'll just quit," but I am trying so hard to muster up the energy to keep this space going right now. Let's play a quick game of catch-up.

Soo... we moved. Really far. We said a tearful goodbye to our home in Virginia, a place we had grown to love, along with so many wonderful friends. I'm still living in vacation mode and it hasn't hit me yet that we will not be returning, but once it does I am going to be a wreck. On the plus side, we relocated back to our roots in California. That has been more fabulous than I had anticipated. Every day we do something with either set of grandparents and the kids see their cousins a couple times a week. Having family around is definitely something we are not accustomed to, but we like it!

Our first weekend back we hit up our local farmers market. Our little "old town" is small but super charming. Evelyn jumped on her first pony ride and squealed with delight the whole time!

Two of the many nice benefits of having so many extra familial hands around - 1) someone to always hold your kids. I occasionally forget I have two children (i kid!) because someone else is always holding them and I'm looking at my empty arms and hands thinking "what is this feeling of freedom!?" and 2) Jared and I can get a couple more snapshots TOGETHER.

Ok, next on the camera roll... Warner's birthday! Yes, his real birthday was back on the 19th, but we "partied" on the 22nd with family.

At first he didn't like the cake. He was so cautious and deterred by it's sticky nature. He poked at it, examined it, cried about it, threw the cake off the plate on to the grass. But once it fell on to the green reeds, I dunno, maybe he liked that presentation better but he ate it! And THEN he licked his plate clean :)

Annndd I have to stop there before this post becomes the longest pictorial overload in the history of blogging. Uh, I actually hate this post. Not the photos or happenings, but my writing. So blah and just all "here's what we did." Not fun, but it's taken me three days, THREE DAYS, to find the time to get these photos up here. I'm actually in the middle of something else that has been taking up a ton of my time, but I'm super excited about it and hope I can launch it soon. Til then, I'm stuck typing lame-o recountals.

Ok, so, we also went to the zoo and Ev hand-fed a giraffe and pet a stingray and Warner had a stare down competition with a sea lion and rode a comodo dragon. Tada! Coolness.

Ok, for realz, this post is done now.