Our Little Tongginator

To Go or Not to Go

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Thu, 02 Feb 2012 08:00:00 +0000

Oh, how I love y'all! I barely blog now; I rarely return emails; and I don't even pop onto Facebook more than once a week. Yet still y'all come out of the woodwork to commiserate with me about high school reunions and all that is zitty. (Yes, I just invented a new word. Thank you very much for noticing. Zitty, pertaining to all things teen angst. Rhymes with... well, y'all know what it rhymes with.) I'm not sure what I've decided about my 20th high school reunion, but regardless, y'all helped me unload the self-reproach, so whatever decision I make will be guilt-free. And yes, I'll share once I decide one way or the other.

On to other news...

Squirt has given up her naps. At 19 months of age. She no longer closes her eyes in the middle of the day. At 19 months of age! She plays quietly in her crib for about an hour each day around noon, but she refuses to fall asleep while the sun is up. AT 19 MONTHS OF AGE!!! I'd like a moment of silence, please.

(I hope you are being silent right now.)

(Unless, of course, you are sobbing on my behalf.)

At least this explains why I rarely blog or return emails anymore. Squirt barely napped for me our first six months home, but I didn't realize she was gonna completely give them up before her second birthday. Two weeks ago a momma on Rumor Queen asked for advice about her newly-turned-four-year-old, who recently began resisting naps. I'm sure I'd love this momma in real life, and that we'd be the best of friends if we ever met, but can I just tell y'all how much I wanted to dive through the computer screen and do a little strangling when I read that message?

But I'm not bitter.

Okay, maybe just a tad.

The Tongginator napped for me every! single! day! until I forced her to give them up a few months before kindergarten started. I secretly rolled my eyes when others complained about their children not napping. Or staying up until after nine at night. Sitting on my high horse, with an air of smugness floating around me, I thought, "Consistency, y'all. Sleep begets sleep." Oh, how the mighty (or once thought she was mighty) has fallen. Children are different. Some children won't sleep no matter what you do. Some children just want to go, Go, GO!

Like Squirt, for instance.

Which reminds me...

Guess where we went yesterday?

The shoe store! To buy Squirt's first REAL pair of shoes!

(And yes, she is carrying a TV remote in her hand.)

(Thank you very much for noticing.)

Because Squirt is just go, Go, GO all the time now.

WALKING.

And not sleeping.

Excuse me while I spend the next ten days finding every parent I ever secretly labeled as too lenient, so that I can prostrate myself before them, begging their forgiveness for my judgmental thoughts and pleading with them to share their wisdom on all things No Nap related.

I Think This Makes Me Officially Old

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Mon, 30 Jan 2012 08:00:00 +0000

I know a lot of y'all are gonna laugh at me because you left this milestone in the dust long ago. I mean, most of y'all adopted from China, and I realize I'm a spring chicken in the China-adoption community. But I still feel old, as in searching for the gray hairs (found! one! in! my! eyebrow! yesterday!) and rubbing extra lotion on my hands old.

This past week I received a Facebook group invitation.

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Favorite Gross Motor Toys for Developmentally Delayed Toddlers

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Fri, 27 Jan 2012 19:02:00 +0000

A significant number of internationally adopted children arrive in their new homes with at least mild gross motor delays. Many of them are late walkers, but even those that can walk often lack core strength and/or the coordination of similarly aged children. The Tongginator did not walk until almost 19 months of age. Much of that can be attributed to her probable premature birth, but her significant sensory issues did not help matters. Squirt, now 18 months, began walking two days before Christmas (woo-hoo!). We attribute her gross motor delays solely to institutionalized care the first eleven months of her life. (Even the almost-hip-displasia came about as a result of life in a crib.)

For those unfamiliar with the term "gross motor," it doesn't involve skills such picking your nose or licking the trash can or throwing toys into the toilet bowl. Although ~~maybe~~ it totally should. No, gross motor simply means large muscle movements such as sitting, crawling, walking, jumping, and on and on. Recent studies show at least 33% of internationally adopted children display significant gross motor delays at the time of adoption, and many more display mild delays attributed to a lack of core strength and/or exposure.

Squirt's been plugging away for the last six months, working with me and with a physical therapist, building her core strength and gross motor skills. Several toys helped us along the way, so I thought I'd share our top ten favorites that promote gross motor development. I included toys that can easily accommodate a child's growing abilities, since most internationally adopted children move from delayed to all-caught-up fairly rapidly. I'd love for y'all to include links to your favorites in the comment section below, along with why it's a favorite. Here are the favorites of Tonggu House, in no particular order (and no, I did not nor will I receive any financial gain for these recommendations):

The Bilibo.

Squirt loves this funky toy. At first we'd place a small ball in the bilibo so that Squirt could rock the "bowl" back and forth to get the ball rolling and spinning. Then we started throwing bean bags and balls into the bilibo. Now she loves to use it as a "chair" sit-n-spin and also to try to climb on top of it when it's flipped over. I know before long she'll be using it as an actual sit-n-spin. The bilibo is a world favorite. It's won several international awards in Germany, Switzerland and the UK.

Sensory Balls.

Y'all can get any brand of sensory balls; this just happens to be the brand we have, since my sister-in-law gifted Squirt with these for Christmas. Bumpy balls are easier to catch and grip, which is what makes them so much easier for children who have gross motor delays. I'd also recommend getting a package of assorted sizes, since toddlers and preschoolers tend to perform different actions with different sized balls.

A Ball Drop.

The brand we have (linked above) received mixed reviews because the pieces separate when children place their weight on it as they learn to pull up, stand, squat, etc. This was never an issue for the late developing Tongginator or Squirt, but I can see where it would be for most children. Regardless of the brand you pick, a ball drop of some kind is a good option. I like this brand because it doesn't make scary noises, and you can add to the set as your child ages. It not only encourages gross and fine motor skills, it also teaches cause-and-effect.

An Acrylic Shoe Mirror.

Okay, so this sounds a little funny, but this - more than anything else - got Squirt to raise her head when she was laying on her tummy, and to sit when she wanted to lay down. She loved, Loved, LOVED looking at herself in the mirror this summer, and she still uses it occasionally, stopping to squat down and check herself out. This past summer Squirt's therapist recommended a floor mirror of some kind. I could not seem to find one that was large enough and clear enough (most baby mirrors aren't actual mirrors). My friend Dory, a former buyer for Ann Taylor, creatively thought "shoe mirror." It was absolutely perfect! In fact, our therapist now recommends shoe mirrors to many of her clients.

My First Toddler Play Kitchen.

What I love about this toddler kitchen is that it isn't too tall. Most plastic play kitchens are not suitable for toddlers because their short little selves can't even reach the pretend counters. This toddler-sized wooden kitchen is great for short one-year-olds. The Tongginator used it back in 2005, and Squirt continues to enjoy it today. We are careful to use appropriate food and dish accessories (no! choking! hazards! allowed!), but otherwise this is perfect to encourage standing, bending, opening cabinets and all manner of things. One word of warning: if you have a child pulling heavily to stand, know that this kitchen may wobble a little or even tip over. It didn't happen to Squirt, but watching it - I'd say it's a possibility. Add a few soup cans to the cabinet and it should solve the problem.

A Shopping Bag or Purse.

Another odd one to include, I know, but bear with me. We don't actually own the purse linked above (Squirt's purse is no longer for sale), but a toddler-friendly purse or shopping bag is excellent for encouraging gross motor development. Just place a few heavy toys in the bag and - wham! - your child will carry a bag low to the ground. It's important for children to learn to walk while carrying items, especially with hands at waist-level or below.

Kids Safety Trampoline.

I love this toddler trampoline because even non-walkers can climb onto it, pull to stand using the safety bar, and bounce away. Squirt has yet to actually jump, but she loves to climb on and off, and to bounce on this trampoline. I love it because it looks and feels exceptionally safe (and I'm one who hates kid trampolines). Added bonus: Santa brought this for Squirt several weeks ago, and it only took "him" five minutes to assemble. My one blech about this is that it does take up quite a bit of space (35" by 35"), but I guess that's life with a toddler.

1-2-3 Grow With Me Walker/ Ride-On Toy/ Shopping Cart.

Tonggu Grammy and the Colonel gifted this little gem to Squirt over Christmas, but truly any "grow-with-me" walking/ riding toy would do. This one is exceptionally easy to push, with wheels that glide smoothly over most surfaces, but it's also a major pain to assemble (just ask my dad - heh). I also like that it has a toy dump for each option (ooh - let's throw the toys in there!). Squirt's still using this as a walker, but we'll probably switch to the ride-on option before her second birthday. When it comes to walkers and internationally adopted toddlers, in my opinion why bother purchasing "just a" walker that your child will use for such a short period of time while he or she plays developmental catch-up?

A Pull Toy.

At the moment, the Tongginator loves this pull toy more than Squirt, but whatever. Any pull toy will do, but I happen to love this Egg Tumbler by Holgate that appeared in Squirt's Christmas stocking. The "egg" rolls round and round while you pull it behind you. I also love that it's wooden instead of plastic. I have nothing against plastic toys, but I do have something against a toy room filled with only plastic toys.

A Push Toy.

Our family happens to love Educo's Butterfly Push Pal Push Toy, but really any push toy will do. Push and pull toys really encourage gross motor development, so be sure to include one of each in your toddler's arsenal of toys. At this point - as a relatively new walker - Squirt simply loves chewing on the stick; however, my seven-year-old Tongginator, formerly known as The Butterfly, loves how this toy's pretty wings flap up and down as it's pushed along. I love that it's not annoyingly noisy. It's a new national favorite - it won an Oppenheim Best Toy Award in 2011.

So what are all y'alls favorite toys to encourage gross motor development?

Finding Her Way

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Mon, 23 Jan 2012 08:00:00 +0000

Last week, the Tongginator flipped through our DVD collection before stumbling upon Lisa Ling's National Geographic documentary China's Lost Girls. After reading the blurb on the back, she asked to watch it. The Husband and I discussed it, finally opting to allow her to view it with us watching alongside her. We did skip over the scenes related to female abductions, but otherwise the Tongginator sat at the kitchen table, eating her snack while the DVD played. I asked if she wanted to talk about anything, both during and after the show, but she shook her head no. She didn't even appear to be watching the documentary, seemingly more absorbed in her food than anything else. And that was that.

Until this weekend.

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Standing Tall, But With My Head in the Sand

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Tue, 17 Jan 2012 08:00:00 +0000

Last week Squirt graduated from physical therapy. Well, she mostly graduated from physical therapy. I don't think I've mentioned this before, but Squirt received a developmental assessment from our state's early intervention program back in July. Every state has some form of early intervention program - in Maryland it's called the Infants and Toddlers Program, or ITP for short - and your child can receive FREE therapy - IN YOUR OWN HOME - if he or she qualifies.

Squirt definitely qualified.

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Jimmy Choo Who

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Fri, 13 Jan 2012 08:00:00 +0000

With everything else going on around here (you know, my zombie-like state due to baby-refuses-to-sleep exhaustion), I might possibly have forgotten to mention the Tongginator's Big News.

She got glasses, y'all.

She's been wishing for glasses since the start of school this year, but all of the conversations centered around fashion. You know, "so-and-so got glasses over the summer and they look super cute. I think I need to wear glasses, too." With comments like that, I didn't take the whole glasses thing too seriously. Because the teachers at school don't call the Tongginator "the jewelry hound" for nothing. I thought the Tongginator simply sought another accessory option.

Turns out I was wrong.

I took her to the eye doctor on New Year's Eve eve. And I found out my little jewelry hound didn't simply want glasses, she actually needs them. The optometrist diagnosed her with a level two prescription, which means she's been running around looking at this for the past few months:

a level 2 prescription ranges

from 20/80 to 20/200

(No wonder she's hated math class for a year now. She couldn't see the stinking equations.)

I started to really hate myself during the eye exam two weeks ago. Because I pride myself on listening to my little Tongginator, to really absorbing what she thinks and feels. Except this time I brushed her comments aside as if an annoying gnat buzzed in my ear. But then... as she and the certified eye technician carefully selected her frames from the final two options... this conversation occurred:

TECHNICIAN: I think I like these frames best. They suit your face.

TONGGINATOR: I like them, too. I want to get these.

TECHNICIAN: Okay, I'll write you down for the Jimmy Choos. Are you sure this is the pair you want?

TONGGINATOR: (completely overwhelmed with excitement) These are Jimmy Choos?!?!!!

TECHNICIAN: Yes.

TONGGINATOR: Wow. Jimmy Choos... I'm gonna have Jimmy Choo glasses.

TONGGU MOMMA: Jimmy who?

TONGGINATOR: Jimmy Choo, Mom. Jimmy! Choo! He's a famous designer. *sigh*

TECHNICIAN: Uh... wow. (looking at me) She knows who Jimmy Choo is?

TONGGU MOMMA: (shrugging my shoulders) I guess so.

The technician looked at me in stunned bewilderment.

TONGGU MOMMA: I know, I know. It's pretty obvious she didn't get it from me.

The child loves her new Jimmy Choo glasses. Because they are Jimmy Choo. Oh, and maybe possibly because now she can actually SEE, but I think that's secondary in her mind.

Suddenly I don't feel so guilty anymore.

I'm Like the Bride of Frankenstein

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Wed, 11 Jan 2012 08:00:00 +0000

Yesterday afternoon, the fun began...

First I felt little hands patting my back, as if to say "I want to play pat-a-cake." Then two toddler fists grabbed fist fulls of hair and yanked. Hard. A diapered tushie clamored onto my neck. A book was shoved into my face. A certain someone shoved her most annoying sound toy in my face before literally and figuratively pushing assorted buttons.

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Because I Am Known For Geniusy-Ness

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Tue, 10 Jan 2012 08:00:00 +0000

A couple of years ago I created an anonymous Facebook account in order to keep up with all y'all Facebook addicts. Only I'm Not Too Bright, so I named my account "Tonggu Momma TMblogs."

(Excuse me while I sink through the floor now.)

(I mean, even "Tonggu Momma Blogs" would have been better than that.)

Anyways, the brilliant minds at Facebook finally caught up with me. Because users aren't supposed to use pseudonyms on personal pages, but they are allowed to do so on website pages. Hence the big change. If y'all were friends with "Tonggu Momma TMblogs," feel free to switch over to my new Tonggu Momma page since the previous account will soon disappear. And consider this a huge thank you for subjecting yourself to ridicule these past few weeks? months? years? as others looked at your friends page and thought, "what the heck kind of name is Tonggu Momma TMblogs? who is my friend friends with???"

Evidently you are friends with an idiot.

Me.

But at least your other Facebook friends won't know once the switch is complete.

All Riled Up Now...

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Thu, 05 Jan 2012 08:00:00 +0000

Okay, so maybe I'm overreacting a bit, which is why I'm turning to y'all, asking for opinions and advice. How would you feel if your local mall gave you the brush-off after you complained (twice!) about this...
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Am I Angry?

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Mon, 02 Jan 2012 08:00:00 +0000

Since Squirt's as yet unexplained provoked tonic-clonic seizures last month, a handful of people have approached me to ask if I feel angry or frustrated about the situation. You know, because the husband and I adopted through China's non-special needs program, with it's astronomical five year wait, yet here we are parenting a child with still undetermined medical special needs. Most asked the question from the perspective "are you angry at yourselves for remaining in the non-special needs line instead of switching to the much faster special-needs program?," but a small few dared to go the whole "are you angry Squirt ended up having medical special needs when you requested a healthy child?" route.

(For the record, the first question doesn't bother me, but the second question... well... ticked off would be a good phrase.)

But the answer is no, to both questions.

I am not sorry we remained in the non-special needs line. For us - as crazy as this sounds to many of y'all - it was an act of obedience. While we believe the long wait led to many changed hearts and actions in regards to China's special need program - which we regard as wonderful - we also believe God called us to remain within the non-special needs program. No, we do not believe that God's Plan A for Squirt's life involved our family (we were definitely her Plan B), but we do think that God's Plan A for us - for me, for the husband, for the Tongginator - involved Squirt specifically. And we feel the Lord blessed us hugely with confirming glimpses of His plan: both in Squirt's birth date and her cribmate. I also believe that the five year wait, as difficult as it felt, created a stronger family unit that could better welcome Squirt. The Tongginator truly needed the extra time, and I grew so very much through the entire process.

I am not sorry we ended up adopting a child who does have some medical and developmental challenges. There are no guarantees in life. I don't think it's wrong to wish and pray for a healthy child, but neither do I think it's a personal right. Adopting is not shopping for a child; it is committing to a child. We committed to Squirt the day we signed the referral papers, and even more so on the day we signed her adoption papers. At that point, less than twelve hours after meeting her, we didn't know she'd be developmentally assessed as a three- to five-month-old at thirteen months of age. At that point, I'd never heard the terms hip displasia, renal reflux, tonic-clonic seizure or reactive hypoglycemia. At that point, I never imagined that I would watch my child undergo two ultrasounds, a VCUG, a C/T scan or an EEG, all within six months of meeting her.

But am I angry?

Hell, no.

I am blessed... so very, very blessed. Squirt is an amazing little gal, with a sweet spirit and an indomitable will. Yes, it's been a steep learning curve for me. And yes, I may fret a tad now and then about the medical unknowns. Her medical needs are quite probably mild, but it's the not knowing for sure that worries me at times. And yes, I may bemoan the daily wrangling involved with giving an angry toddler a morning glucose test. Many parents deal with much worse, of course, but I know only what I live.

But no, I am not angry.

I'm Squirt's mom.

How can I be angry about a blessing such as that?

Top 10 Photos of 2011

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Sat, 31 Dec 2011 22:54:00 +0000

Every year I torture myself with the impossible task of finding ten photographs that tell a great story without showing the faces of my two precious girls. Because I spill enough personal stuff around here without flashing their names and faces across the blogosphere. It felt a tad more difficult this year because life felt busier than usual. I mean, I only took a dozen photos during the entire month of September, y'all.

Twelve. Just 12.

Ah, well. The year is over tomorrow and I promise to do better in the coming months, mostly because my favorite (and pretty much only) Christmas gift this year was a Tamron zoom lens (18 to 270mm). All y'all say ooh... aah... oh. The lens doesn't help with this year, however, so bear with me. It was slim pickings, for sure.

#1 Am I A Terrible Momma For Snapping
This Photo Instead of Helping Her Up?

At least I didn't laugh at her. Much. (And no, she wasn't hurt.)

#2 Momma Don't Do Wedgies
(At Least, Not Anymore)

The Tongginator looked oh-so-classy during our annual Chinese

New Year celebration. And yes, y'all, I hate the dress. The

Tongginator begged to wear it. She wants to look like her friends.

#3 Love At First Sight

Oh, how the Tongginator fell in love with her mei mei on

referral day. She had no expectations, no preconceived

notions. She just LOVED her sister... oh so much.

#4 Because We Are All About
Modesty At Tonggu House

I really have no words for this photo except to say

that Tonggu Daddy was teaching her how to play

miniature golf. And ONLY miniature golf.

#5 It's Not Empty Anymore (But
It's Not Clean Anymore Either)

Squirt's room, just a few weeks before we traveled.

#6 The Tongginator Has Big Plans

I love how the Tongginator chose to write her end-of-the-school-year
book about meeting her mei mei. And the timing? Was perfect. Everyone
shared their stories with their classmates just one week before we left for China.

#7 Meeting Squirt, Only We Didn't
Yet Know She Was Squirt

Because she didn't leak at all. She had a dry diapers, with no drool
and - most surprisingly - no tears. The tears came later that night.
The drool came later that week, as she cut her first tooth. And the
pee... well... the pee never seems to stop.

#8 Thank Goodness I Have
Friends Who Aren't Lazy

If not for Canuck K and a few other friends, my gals would rarely craft
and never make a mess. Not because I care if they smear paint all over
their sweet selves, but because I'm too darn lazy to clean up the aftermath.

#9 Squirt Meets Nanny P

I just love this photo. I don't know why.
Maybe it's my little one's pot belly.

#10 In Which My Squirt Proves
Yet Again How Strong She Is

This one may surprise y'all. But I felt so happy when I snapped
this photo because I'd just learned Squirt would be discharged soon.
And oh, how she impressed me that week with her strength and resilience.

Check out my Top Ten Photos from 2008, 2009 and 2010.

Year in Review: 2011

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Fri, 30 Dec 2011 11:00:00 +0000

In honor of the second-to-the-last day of 2011, I present to you Our Little Tongginator's year in review:

In January, I took some heat for continuing on the path of our second adoption. It seems that several people viewed my willingness to listen to differing opinions about adoption as an actual anti-adoption stance. Umm... no. And I explained it all in my Why Continue? post. I also got all up on my soapbox with my parenting post Neither Constant Criticism Nor Constant Praise Works. Oh my lands, y'all, was I sanctimonious last January or what?

On the last day of February, I learned that we were next, Next, NEXT for a referral. Little did I know that our "next" status would last an entire month.

March was a time for authenticity. I exposed my anal-self to y'all when I confessed to my children's book addiction and my *blush* Tonggu House Dewey Decimal System; whereas my newly turned seven-year-old Tongginator stunned y'all with her wisdom about The Secret of Happiness.

In April y'all just embraced us as we celebrated the adoption referral of our future daughter. You laughed with me as I experienced The Call on April Fool's Day, praised God when we realized what our family was doing on the day mei mei was born, and cried with me as I struggled while waiting to receive travel dates.

Y'all got me through the month of May with your Best Packing Tips and ideas for the Tongginator's China Scavenger Hunt List. Oh, and the Tongginator gave us all a fit of the giggles when she asked me "How do they MEET?"

June brought us Mei Mei. And a glimpse of God's plan in all of that waiting.

I didn't blog all that much as summer turned into fall, since our family continued to adjust to life with Mei Mei. In July, however, I did share about a few medical issues, including the Infamous Pee and our initial concerns about hip dysplasia.

Our Little Tongginator kinda turned into an informational blog during the month of August. I guess that's all I had time for, since Squirt ended up so ill she was hours from a septicemia diagnosis. Helping a Family Who Recently Adopted and Adoption Links for School appeared to resonate the most with y'all.

And in September, Mei Mei morphed into Squirt. Plus, I got real with y'all when I wrote Confessions of a New Mom.

I can't believe I didn't write a single post in October. How the heck did that happen?

I shared more about Sweet, Sweet Squirt in November. And many of y'all identified with my post on Two Roads, about the vast differences in our attachment journeys with our two girls.

December still feels surreal to me. It brought One of the Worst Days of My Life, but it also brought a moment of such profound sweetness when the Tongginator decided to share her Cardboard Testimonial.

I don't know what 2012 will bring in terms of this blog. I had hoped to return to blogging daily when school hit this past fall, but that didn't happen. I don't know whether it's Squirt keeping me busy or if my priorities have changed that much, but I figure I'll take it month by month. I enjoy writing, and don't seem to have time to craft a book at this stage in my life.

Thanks for walking through 2011 with our family. Y'all made me laugh, cry, think and generally kept me mostly sane during a year of tremendous change at Tonggu House. I cannot thank you enough.

Thank Goodness They Were Red, Like My Cheeks

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Sun, 25 Dec 2011 01:15:00 +0000

Well, y'all, I didn't think anything could ever top the ballet recital nose picking incident, but oh how wrong was I. Because tonight during our church's Christmas Eve worship service, while the Tongginator sweetly sang Angels We Have Heard on High with the other children, she decided to fix a little something that irked her. Yes, y'all, her sensory self simply couldn't take it a moment longer, so she took matters into her own hands.

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The Tongginator's Testimonial

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Thu, 22 Dec 2011 08:00:00 +0000

Last year the Husband and I made A Big Decision about Christmas. We decided to stay home through Christmas morning. I am so very glad we chose this new tradition for our family because - for the first time - the Tongginator will participate in a Christmas Eve program at church. Every year prior to this she's watched longingly as angels and wise men walked past her while a narrator read from Scripture. She's wistfully mouthed the words to famous carols as other children worshiped in front of the congregation. She's watched her cousins chat with friends on Christmas Eve during the cookie hour.

But this year? This year we'll be home.

She. Is. Thrilled.

Not only will she sing with other children during our evening service, she's also doing something that will touch y'all in a huge way. This month our pastor led a sermon series on miracles, with the final two sermons in the series occurring on Christmas Eve and Day. Several weeks ago he asked the congregation to prayerfully consider sharing cardboard testimonials during the Christmas Eve service that signify miracles in their lives.

Y'all, my seven-year-old asked to share one.

My SEVEN-YEAR-OLD.

The Tongginator first spoke with me about sharing her cardboard testimonial. When I spoke with our pastor to ask his opinion, he felt absolutely thrilled, especially since she's the only child in the congregation to do so. In fact, y'all, he told me his heart absolutely melted when he heard her words. Now at this point in her life, my Tongginator has not chosen to be baptized, but still, she recognized a miracle in her life, and she wants to share it with our new church family.

Her cardboard testimonial will read:

waited my whole life for a sister (five LONG years)

*******

blessed with Squirt, my new baby sister

The tears, they well up every time I think of it.

My husband and I are the ones who are blessed, by both of our girls.

Fish Lips and Pizza

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Tue, 20 Dec 2011 09:41:00 +0000

It's been a long time since my little Tongginator made me laugh out loud... she's definitely growing up into Quite The Big Girl. But every once in awhile she somehow manages to give me a fit of the giggles. Like last week, while we reviewed a school assignment together.

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Grump... Grump... Grump

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Mon, 19 Dec 2011 12:05:00 +0000

I really hate giving Squirt the glucose test every morning. There is just something so wrong with purposefully making your child bleed, even if it's only a tiny drop of blood.

What do y'all hate having to do?

Answers From a Baby

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Fri, 16 Dec 2011 08:00:00 +0000

Here are parts ONE, TWO, THREE and FOUR. And can I just tell y'all thank you... thank you so much for all of your prayers and emotional support this past week. It would have felt like a much more difficult week without y'all. Every! single! comment made me feel better. Thank you to everyone, especially those who shared personal experiences, and those of you who've been praying for us.

The Tongginator came home on Saturday, and it felt so very good to have both my girls tucked snugly in their beds that night. We had a relatively uneventful weekend, and on Monday morning we all headed out to drop off the Tongginator at school before driving to meet with the pediatric neurologist. I briefly spoke with the Tongginator's primary teacher and her math teacher. They were wonderful about her absences the previous week, and had sent home many assignments on Friday with another second grader from our bus stop.

Which was very helpful.

After we left the school, we headed to Annapolis to meet with the pediatric neurologist. This was the guy everyone said we needed to see. He came highly recommended and, at first, we couldn't get an appointment with him until February. But some calls were made, and the husband didn't take no for an answer, and all of a sudden we were seeing him less than a week after Squirt's seizures.

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A Night in the Hospital

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Thu, 15 Dec 2011 08:00:00 +0000

Here are parts ONE, TWO and THREE. Oh, and just so y'all know - so you don't grow concerned - Squirt has been home since last Thursday, and has been seizure-free so far. We saw a pediatric neurologist on Monday morning, and I'll write about that visit tomorrow.

I know many of y'all have spent dozens of nights in various hospitals and Ronald McDonald houses. Me? Not so much. There were those several nights back in November of 2006 when the husband became a Rock Star in Cardio. And... well... that's about it.

Adding one night to a count of three doesn't seem like such big of a deal.

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Acronyms Galore

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Wed, 14 Dec 2011 08:00:00 +0000

Here are PART ONE and PART TWO. Oh, and just so y'all know - so you don't grow concerned - Squirt has been home since last Thursday, and has been seizure-free so far. We saw a pediatric neurologist on Monday morning, and I'll write about that visit as soon as I have time.

Squirt dealt well with all of the testing, mostly because the Ativan completely knocked her on her little diapered tushie. She didn't even have a clue about the CAT scan. They allowed me to sit next to her during the scan while the husband waited just outside in the hallway. A CAT scan is pretty basic, since you just lay still and let the machine do all of the work. Now... if Squirt had been awake during the test... oh my lands. Because the phrase "just lay still" doesn't seem like a big deal unless you're talking about a toddler.

And Squirt is very much a toddler now, despite the fact that she's not walking yet.

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The Shock Sets In

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Tue, 13 Dec 2011 08:00:00 +0000

You can read PART ONE here. Oh, and just so y'all know - so you don't grow concerned - Squirt has been home since Thursday, and has been seizure-free so far. We saw a pediatric neurologist on Monday morning, and I'll write about that visit as soon as I have time.

I clamored down from the ambulance oh-so-gracefully, as only Tonggu Momma can do. Of course I forgot the diaper bag, so the driver ran after me, carrying it, as I trotted to keep up through the maze of hallways. We arrived in the pediatric ER at 10:05 AM and immediately the questions began as they placed leads all over Squirt's body and inserted a peripheral IV line.
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One of the Worst Days of My Life

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Mon, 12 Dec 2011 08:00:00 +0000

It poured here last Wednesday morning, so much so that the husband - who planned to work from home that day - offered to drive the Tongginator to school so that I wouldn't have to take Squirt out in the wet weather. Since Squirt continued to slumber peacefully upstairs at 8:40 in the morning, I gratefully waved them both off and sat down to read email and enjoy a cup of coffee.

That lasted all of 10 minutes.

I can't believe how much happened during the next half hour.
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Holiday Humor

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Thu, 08 Dec 2011 08:00:00 +0000

Long-time readers know how much those of us at Tonggu House adore the Fish family of five. If you've yet to understand the appeal...

Behold their neighbor's house, all decorated for the holidays.

Behold the Fish family's house, also all bedazzled for the holidays.

Oh, how I love them.

Definitely Not a Brain Surgeon

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Wed, 07 Dec 2011 08:00:00 +0000

So Mrs. O reprimanded me a few days ago because of my newly horrible blogging record. I told her that I don't blog all that much anymore because my days consist of an endless stream of "in... out... in... out," although sometimes things get really exciting around here with a 15 minute version of "up... down... up... down" or "head... toes... neck... teeth... head... toes... head... and your head again."

I feel like a brain surgeon.

Or maybe just a urologist.

Because if I'm not playing endless rounds of peek-a-boo, or singing the twentieth version of Itsy-Bitsy Spider, then I am of course talking about the pee.

Because yes, y'all, it's still an issue, although much less of one. It's less about medical stuff and more about Squirt's amazing ability to pee on people. Or floors. Or the couch. Or whatever. Until Squirt, I never knew girls could actually shoot up at the person changing their diapers. The doctor tells me that all is anatomically correct with Squirt, she just possesses unusual agility that makes the upward Arc of Pee possible. In the past three days, Squirt has peed on me and on the bathroom floor. She's also spent more than two hours at the doctor's office while we waited for a urine sample.

I hate those bags.

Every time I bring in a urine sample, I invariably hand off the cup to someone who has yet to meet our Squirt. They look at the pitiful amount of urine moistening the bottom of the cup, and tell me to give it another go. They Need More Pee. But then - miraculously - someone who knows Squirt always rounds the corner of the desk just in time to tell me not to bother. Because they know how much Squirt loathes The Bag. So she holds it; then she gushes. Which means the bag tears off.

And the pee spills out.

Making things rather challenging, since we have to obtain a urine sample from Squirt every time she runs a fever. Even if she's simply teething. Just to Be Sure. Which is why we were at the doctor's office yesterday for over two hours.

I received a call at 5:08 PM yesterday telling me that Squirt's pee was clear. Approximately five minutes later, Squirt let loose. And by let loose I mean she has a stomach virus, if you get my meaning. If you don't, let me just say that I threw away her clothes. I almost threw away my clothes, but at the last minute I changed my mind and ran them through the sanitize option in our washing machine. She had a bath. I had a shower. And we are calling the carpet cleaners in the morning.

Ah, well... at least it wasn't another urinary tract infection. And now you understand why I'm not blogging all too often anymore. Because who in their right mind talks about pee and poo and spiders this much?

I? Am totally brain dead.

MIA Anniversary

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Tue, 06 Dec 2011 09:00:00 +0000

The husband traveled out of town for work over the weekend. He was supposed to arrive home last night, just in time to celebrate our thirteenth wedding anniversary. Instead, he arrived during the wee hours this morning because he missed his connecting flight in Dallas. In fact, everyone on his plane missed their connecting flights in Dallas because the flight out of Oklahoma departed two hours late.

And not! one! single! person! complained.

Instead they quietly made other arrangements, trying to grab any of the final flights of the day or make last minute hotel reservations. The husband felt fortunate to have grabbed the last flight into Reagan, even though he flew out of BWI. Which meant he had to grab a cab to take him about an hour away to the short-term parking lot at BWI before driving home early this morning.

And still we didn't complain.

Because the reason his flight from Oklahoma to Dallas took off late? More than half of the individuals disembarking the plane in Tulsa required assistance leaving said plane. They needed walkers. And wheelchairs. And escorts.

They were all wounded American military personnel, returning from the wars.

They deserved no complaints.

A Thanksgiving Wedding

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Mon, 21 Nov 2011 16:49:00 +0000

I've been such a terrible blogger, I know I haven't told y'all that Ring is getting remarried. Or should I say that he did get married, since the ceremony occurred this past weekend. I know, I know - horrible blogger - blah blah blah. Anyways, the ceremony occurred this past weekend, in a beautiful tiny cedar chapel with many relatives and a few friends gathered close.

It was beautiful.

So beautiful, in fact, that Rosie's momma, who flew in for the ceremony from Florida, said, "I think I liked this service better than the first." Yes, y'all, she really is that sweet. And it was beautiful. The bride looked gorgeous; the children looked adorable; and Ring teared up while standing at the altar, waiting for his fiance to walk down the aisle.

As difficult as it felt, I am so blessed that the Husband and I got to witness it.

And it was difficult because Rosie was never far from our thoughts. And because now begins a new chapter in Ring's life. He and his bride traveled to Canada this week for their honeymoon (she's Canadian). When they return, they'll be moving into their new house. A house that is not right next-door. And the children still attend a private school rather than the Tongginator's local public school. Which means we'll hardly ever see them.

I just hope we still will see them.

Because I had the most precious conversation with Posies at the reception. Oh my lands, y'all, I forgot how much these two children stole my heart. We spent a lot of time together, the twins, the Tongginator and me. (Ring's sister and I split the childcare while Rosie was at her most ill.) With Squirt home in June, and Ring and the twins living one town away while the new house was being built, we hardly saw them over the summer and into the fall. But Posies hardly skipped a beat when she saw me. Her face lit up like a Christmas tree, and she ran across the dance floor to barrel into my arms. I scooped her up, and then:

TONGGU MOMMA: Posies, I have two things to tell you.

Posies nodded solemnly.

TONGGU MOMMA: The first thing is that you look like a princess today.

She glowed.

TONGGU MOMMA: And the second thing is that both of your mommies were and are so lucky to have you as a daughter.

POSIES: (a small grin peeked out before slipping away) Miss TM?

TONGGU MOMMA: Yes, honey?

POSIES: I really miss my mom.

TONGGU MOMMA: Oh, I know you do, sweetheart.

POSIES: (grinning again) But guess what? I have a new mom now, too!

Yes, Posies. Yes, you do. And she will be amazing, just as your first mommy was.