Our Little Tongginator

Chinese New Year Chapter Books for Older Kids

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Thu, 04 Feb 2016 01:29:00 +0000

There are many lists about Chinese New Year books for preschoolers and young elementary students, but very few highlight chapter books for middle graders and tweens. There aren't many out there, but they DO exist. Here are a few of the Tongginator's favorites as well as several I've stumbled upon at our local elementary school library.

The Chinese New Year Mystery (Nancy Drew Notebooks) by Carolyn Keene. The third graders at Nancy's school are learning about Chinese culture during the Chinese New Year holiday. Nancy, George and Bess really get into the spirit of things, especially after they enjoy a traditional holiday dinner at the home of their classmate Mari Cheng. At school, the highlight of their celebration will be a dragon parade. Nancy's class spent lots of time creating the dragon out of feathers, sequins, gold tassels and red silk, but right before the parade the dragon disappears! Will Nancy and her friends be able to find the dragon in time for the parade? [typically second or third grade]

Happy New Year, Julie! by Megan McDonald. Ivy is the best friend of Julie, the "American Girl" from the seventies. I wish there was a Chinese-American AG rather than just a best friend, but at the moment Ivy is all they have. And she's great, I just wish she had a more starring role. In this book, Ivy celebrates Chinese New Year with her best friend Julie. (Although not CNY specific, Ivy also plays a major role in the book Good Luck, Ivy.) If your child is a fan of American Girl, then definitely include these books in your collection. [typically third or fourth grade]

In the Year of the Boar and Jackie Robinson by Bette Bao Lord. ALA Notable Children's Book; School Library Journal Best Book; Parent's Choice Silver Honor Book; Virginia's Jefferson Cup Award. Shirley Temple Wong sails from China to Brooklyn, New York during the spring of 1947. (Chapter One is titled "Chinese New Year.") Shirley is struggling to learn English, but then a miracle happens - baseball! Jackie Robinson, the first black major league baseball player, becomes everyone's hero. He proves that anyone - the grandson of a slave, a new Chinese immigrant - can make a difference in America. [typically third or fourth grade]

The Magical Monkey King: Mischief in Heaven by Ji-Li Jiang. We hear the fable of the irrepressible Monkey King every Chinese New Year. The story begins with Monkey's birth on the Mountain of Flowers and Fruits. After proving himself to the monkey tribe, who choose him as their king, Monkey tries to learn the secret of immortality, travels under the sea to steal a powerful weapon from the Dragon King, and wreaks havoc at the heavenly court of the Jade Emperor. Only Buddha can stop his mischief, and does so in a scene that works as exciting action and profound metaphor. This version is abridged enough so that the kids don't get bored, but is complete enough to be faithful to the full-length novel Journey to the West. [typically third or fourth grade]

The New Year Dragon Dilemma (A to Z Mysteries) by Ron Roy. Dink, Josh, and Ruth Rose are in San Francisco, home of the biggest Chinatown in the United States. They plan to watch the famous Chinese New Year parade and see Miss Chinatown ride by on a giant float. But when night falls and the fireworks crackle, Miss Chinatown goes missing, and so does her crown. The celebration is ruined, and the prime suspect is a friend! Now Dink, Josh, and Ruth Rose must clear their friend's name by finding the real culprit.Can the kids crack the case? [typically second or third grade]

Tales of a Chinese Grandmother by Frances Carpenter. All of the members of the Ling family, and especially the grandchildren Yu-Lang and Ah-Shung, love hearing stories told by their aged grandmother Lao Lao (Old Old One). She shares with the next generations tales of old focusing on the Ling ancestors who lived centuries ago. Each chapter details a different story - thirty in all. Several, though not all, of Lao Lao's stories focus on Chinese New Year holiday celebrations and traditions, including The God That Lived in the Kitchen, Guardians of the Gate, The Painted Eyebrow and Ting Lan and the Lamb. [typically fourth or fifth grade]

When the Circus Came to Town by Lawrence Yep. This book is based on actual events that occurred in the early twentieth century. Ursula loves living in tiny Whistle, Mont., or what her Pa calls the Back of Beyond, even though the circus won't ever come to her tiny town. She stays busy helping her parents run the stagecoach station, roams the wild hills and, after reading a penny dreadful that a stagecoach passenger leaves behind, invents a rollicking pirate adventure game with her friends. Everything changes when she catches small pox. Now all she wants is to hide her scarred face. But Ah Sam, her parents' Chinese cook, has other ideas. He brings to town a magical circus and finds a way to give Ursula the confidence she needs to face the world. In return, Ursula finds a way to make Ah Sam happy. She creates the biggest, best Chinese New Year celebration that )Whistle, Montana, has ever seen! [typically third or fourth grade]

The Year of the Dog and its sequels by Grace Lin. ALA Children's Notable; Asian Pacific American Librarian Association Honor; NAPPA Gold Winner; CCBC Choice; Five state award nominations, including the NCCB. It's the Chinese Year of the Dog, and as Pacy celebrates the holiday with her family, she learns that this is the year she's supposed to "find herself" and make new friends. These books are some of the more popular featuring a Chinese-American protagonist. If your child is a girl, and you only get one series, this is the one I would recommend. [typically third or fourth grade]

The Zodiac Legacy and its sequels by Stan Lee. While not precisely a book about Chinese New Year, The Zodiac Legacy and it's sequels give a nod to the Great Race and the twelve Chinese zodiac animals who placed first through twelfth. When 12 magical superpowers originating from the animals of the Chinese zodiac are unleashed on the world, a Chinese-American teen named Steven will join an epic global chase. While on a once-in-a-lifetime trip to Hong Kong, Steven suddenly finds himself equipped with the aggressive fighting prowess of the tiger. He teams up with his tour guide Jasmine and Jasmine's friends in a race to find the others infused with these rogue zodiac powers before Maxwell and his paramilitary goons get to them first. [typically fourth through sixth grade]

No One Talked There

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Mon, 19 May 2014 10:30:00 +0000

My two girls are so different when it comes to how they think and feel about adoption, and yes, that's taking into account their rather large age difference (over six years apart). You see, Squirt - at nearly four years of age - just doesn't want to talk about adoption or even China all that much - yet, before the age of two, the Tongginator was all about China and already feeling her losses quite heavily.

It's been a learning curve for me, navigating parenting a child who avoids the topic rather than nearly obsessing over it.

We don't talk about things with Squirt in the same way that we did with the Tongginator, mostly because Squirt never brings it up. I am sure to work in "I'm so glad we adopted you" as a regular part of our conversation, and Squirt will tell others "I was born in China." The only grief she's shared at this point in time is the sadness and anger she feels that I didn't "come get her sooner." But - really - that's about the extent of it. She's heading to pre-k in August, and kindergarten the following year, so I knew I needed to start broaching the topic with her more often while still following her lead. I don't want her to first hear that she has "a real mother" or "another mommy" from some kid at school.

Mother's Day was a great opportunity.

I pulled out a few adoption-specific books alongside other popular "mom books" like Mothers Are Like That; Llama Llama, Red Pajama; and I Love You the Purplest. We read several in the days leading up to and following Mother's Day. I reshelved most of them a few days ago, but I kept three favorites from the bunch in her book basket. One of them happens to be You're Not My Real Mother. Squirt loves this book for some reason.

I've known for a bit that I need to make sure Squirt knows that I'm not her biological mother before she heads off to school, even though she's very uncomfortable every time I try to broach the subject. I mean, she knows she's "adopted," but I wasn't sure if she really understood what that word meant. After reading You're Not My Real Mother yet again on Friday, I talked to her about it. I mentioned her friend's mom, who is expecting her third child in September. We talked about the baby growing in "a special place inside her tummy." And I told her that she didn't grow inside me.

TONGGU MOMMA: I'm your real mommy, just like in the book, but you also have a real mommy and a real daddy who live in China. We don't know who they are, but we know that for some reason they couldn't take care of you. You needed a mommy and daddy who could take care of you, and that's why Daddy and I were able to adopt you.

Squirt was quiet for a minute.

SQUIRT: Mommy... I didn't like the orphanage.

TONGGU MOMMA: I know, honey.

Although I didn't really believe she remembered not liking it. She was not even a year old when we adopted her. And we don't talk about it a whole lot because it stresses her out. I've never said anything harsh about her orphanage in front of her. And the Tongginator lived in foster care and has never visited an orphanage, so it's unlikely she's talked about it with Squirt, although maybe she has. Squirt has seen video of the day we met many times, but not any video and few photos of her orphanage. And then she floored me...

SQUIRT: I didn't like it. No one talked there.

No one talked there.

The thing is, she's right. No one DID talk there. The short video the Husband and I have seen (but don't actually have in our possession since we didn't film it) of her orphanage room - secretly shot the day after we adopted her - was nearly silent. Almost 20 babies/ toddlers sat in cribs in that room, just staring into space and/or quietly playing with their hands. The video footage we saw lasted nearly 10 minutes, and none of the children spoke. None of the children babbled.

None of the children cried.

None of them even cried.

Squirt was eleven-and-a-half months old at the time of adoption. I can't positively state that she has true memories of her time in the orphanage. I feel silly even mentioning the possibility at all. But that statement came from somewhere, and it wasn't from me or the husband.

No one talked in her orphanage.

And she hated it.

I gave her a hug, and told her, "you never have to live there again, Squirt. You are going to live with Mommy and Daddy and the Tongginator. We are a family forever and ever." She looked at me for a few seconds and then matter-of-factly stated, "okay. Next book."

And that was the end of it. So far.

I Have a Cold, Cold Heart

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Fri, 11 Apr 2014 11:00:00 +0000

This is a not-so-short PSA announcing that I just may shoot myself if I have to hear even one more off-key, beltingly loud version of Frozen's "Let It Go." I know you mommas of girls know what I'm talking about. I think every North American girl between the ages of three and 11 knows nearly every line of that movie and the entire! stinkin'! soundtrack!

And even some of the boys.

I actually loved the movie the first time I saw it. And the second. And even possibly the tenth. But now? Now I basically want to shoot myself in the eye every time I hear the opening strains of Christophe Beck's score. My poor husband, who must daily "play princesses" with the Tongginator and Squirt for at least ten minutes, is ready to create an eternal winter at Tonggu House just to avoid the reprimands. No, y'all, it's not me correcting the poor guy... it's the girls. They express their frustrations with him daily. Why, you may ask? Well, he dares to remain clueless of the movie's dialog. He knows the general plot, of course, so less ~~obnoxious~~ discriminating children would probably give his paraphrasing a pass, but my girls expect him to deliver his lines word for word.

Word for stinking word, y'all.

When he makes a mistake, their long-suffering sighs and impatient corrections chase their dad away faster than you can say "Oaken's trading post." Typically the girls assign him the role of Kristoff, but sometimes he must also fill in for Hans or Sven. The Tongginator is always Elsa, whereas Squirt waffles between Anna and Olaf. (Did I tell y'all Squirt chose to be a snowman for Halloween? Because she did. And that was even before Olaf came on the scene. For some strange reason, that girl LOVES snowmen.) When their high standards chase their dad away, the girls then revert to belting out various songs from the soundtrack.

I must confess, I can no longer tolerate "Let it Go."

Or even "Love is an Open Door."

Although even my frozen heart must concede that Squirt's version of "Do You Want to Build a Snowman?" IS priceless.

And then there is Squirt's gloves saga. She found elbow-length gloves in our dress-up bin about two weeks ago. Since then she's refused to do pretty much anything unless she's wearing her "Elsa gloves." I draw the line at bathroom trips and mealtimes, but the playground? School? Church? Trips to Target? Whatever - it's not worth the battle. The gloves wouldn't be so bad, except whenever she's wearing them, she holds her fingers at these funny angles, one can only assume mimicking Elsa as she shoots out imaginary ice and snow.

Squirt loves to run with her fingers splayed in front of her, arms stretched straight forward, with a blue tiara perched atop her head. Wherever she is. WHEREVER she is, y'all... through the mall, at the playground, down the aisles of our church sanctuary. WHEREVER. The Tongginator, on the other hand, only "plays Frozen" when ensured complete privacy (excluding immediate family members, of course). She tends to don a "cape" she created out of an over-sized scarf and run around the house, stomping her foot. I'm guessing she's imitating Elsa creating the frozen river/ocean/whatever body of water that is.

Please tell me I'm not the only one dealing with Frozen drama at my house. I know I can't be, if the barren store shelves that should be stocked with Frozen merchandise mean anything. I can't be alone in this. And if y'all don't hear from me again, it's probably because I'm recovering from a self-inflicted gunshot wound.

I'm just saying.

Awkward Conversation #327

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Fri, 14 Feb 2014 21:15:00 +0000

I don't know about y'all, but I try very hard to stay out of my childrens' social lives, especially the Tongginator's now that she is approaching ten. Every once in awhile, I might make a comment to the Tongginator about an incident with a friend, or we might role-play how a future interaction might go better, but I rarely talk with other parents about girl drama.

I believe in the "work it out yourselves" school of thought.

On Valentine's Day the Tongginator came home from a playdate. Now that I think about it, at what age do you stop calling these things playdates and start calling them "hanging out" at a friend's house? Anyways, the playdate. She's not my favorite friend of the Tongginator's for a myriad of reasons, but I've never said anything to the Tongginator about her except once to say I didn't exactly approve of how A. treats her mom. Usually I have to drag the Tongginator kicking and screaming from this friend's house, mostly because A. likes to run and hide when it's time to end. Today, however, the Tongginator and her friend were waiting at the door when I pulled up.

First clue.

The Tongginator was exceptionally quiet on the drive home.

Second clue.

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Sickness, Day Eleven

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Tue, 28 Jan 2014 15:02:00 +0000

We are heading into Day 11 of Sickness at Tonggu House and I'm feeling a bit twitchy. The Tongginator is back at school after a week lying on the couch, watching The Food Network and House Hunters and listening to me nag her about drinking enough. I swear this child is like a camel: she can go for days without drinking anything. Which is quite useful during long car trips, but not so much when she's trying to recover from a nasty cold.

Today Squirt entered Day Three of her pajama fashion show. And by this I mean I've carted her everywhere - the grocery store, the pharmacy, the Tongginator's school - wearing oh-so-stylish pjs. For example, this morning during our car ride to school she wore her jolly snowman pajamas topped with her Amber princess dress and a pair of dinosaur slippers. Thankfully we avoided drama this morning... and by drama I mean the type from momma... I guess all of those years parenting the "Princess-Butterfly-Rainbow-Girl Tongginator" taught me a few lessons.

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All or Nothing: We Deal with Both at This House

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Mon, 27 Jan 2014 21:25:00 +0000

Just when you (mistakenly) think you've got everything figured out, life throws you another curve ball. I've spent the past nine years walking through the minefield of "adoption and race stuff" with the Tongginator, trying my best to hear and support her voice. After years of wandering around, blindly trying to lead and follow at the same time, we've come to a good place, she and I. I have made and do make mistakes, of course, but I feel confident that we have a level of trust between us that allows her to express her opinions without fear of hurting my feelings, making me feel angry, or whatever. I hope I don't screw that up as she ages.

But I'm not just parenting the Tongginator anymore.

Because now I have Squirt, too.

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50 Books About Being Different

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Wed, 22 Jan 2014 13:49:00 +0000

I've been on a bit of a book kick this past year, probably because I got all riled up at our county library this past summer. It seems our library's "Summer Reading Program" isn't actually as advertized, and is instead a "Summer Activities Program." My Tongginator read all of the books on the rising fourth grader list, but was told by an oh-so-friendly librarian that she would not in fact receive the prize advertized for the READING program because she failed to attend an afternoon ACTIVITY sponsored by the library the previous week, a magic show oh-so-helpfully geared for preschoolers.

*banging head against wall*

Whatever. But now I'm on a bit of a book kick. I think it's extremely important to expose our children to books that depict a wide range of races, faiths, cultures, abilities and interests. One aspect of privilege is assuming that most of the people you or your children study in history classes and books will be of the same race, culture, gender or faith as you are. Exposing our children to fictional characters and historical figures that don't reflect their experience helps give our children a broader view of the world. It also encourages empathy. So here goes my list of fifty books about being different.

I hope your local library carries many of these titles.

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Yes, We are Alive. Who knew?!!?

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Thu, 16 Jan 2014 20:34:00 +0000

Tap, tap. Tap, tap.

Hello? Is this thing on?

(Corny, I know. Forgive me, y'all - I'm totally out of practice.)

Where do I even begin? I guess I should start by confessing that I have absolutely No Valid Reason for dropping off the face of the blog world. Except that Squirt gave up her nap before her second birthday. And I guess I'm just not as good at time management as many of y'all. No nap = little blogging time for Momma. And then there was the fact that - for more than a year - the Tongginator nixed any and all stories about her, as is her right. Plus the Husband wasn't too happy with the amount of time I sat in front of the computer each evening, probably because it had grown to astronomical proportions. To be honest, I - and everyone else in my family - grew exhausted just thinking about the blog, so I put it to the side for awhile.

And then life just kinda kept chugging along.

Until suddenly over two years had passed.

But one day last winter, I posted something on my real life Facebook account. It was something funny Squirt had said; and my friend and neighbor Mrs. O commented, "sounds like it's time to start up the blog again." Which got me thinking. And thinking. Especially since I received a few emails the following week from some sweethearts who shared bits of their personal stories with me, hard roads they are walking with attachment. And then several months ago quime posted on the Rumor Queen forum, asking if anyone had heard from me.

No one answered... not even me.

And it's been eating at me ever since.

We are all doing really well. The Tongginator somehow managed to become nearly-ten-years-old while I wasn't looking. She's still very much the Tongginator some days, but most of the time she's a strange mix of Tongginator/ tween/ proper young lady/ needy youngster. I don't know how she manages to pull that look off with just a pair of jeans, a sparkly t-shirt and boots, but it works for her. Fourth grade has been wonderful so far - for the first time ever, we didn't hear any "social concerns" during the fall parent/teacher conference. One real concern is perfectionism, which continues to plague her, causing her to have Meltdowns Of Epic Proportions should she fail to receive a "good grade," whatever that means. But she's enjoying school for the most part, especially chorus, writing class and violin. She learned to swim and ride a two-wheel bike last year, which made my momma's heart swell with pride. (It was a long time coming, y'all. She worked so, so hard.) She's learning to ride a horse. And the child who once couldn't get enough Mei Mei and Jade told me last summer that she's had it with Chinese School. She wants O-U-T out.

(How in the world did that happen?)

Parenting? There is definitely a learning curve, y'all. And once you feel you've mastered one child and/or developmental stage, another curve ball comes racing at you.

Squirt is three-and-a-half-years-old, which absolutely boggles my mind. She's very, very different from the Tongginator in personality, but man, oh man she still keeps me on my toes. This child loves to learn. And I don't mean pick up a few facts here and there, I mean she devours information like a t-rex devours a stegosaurus. And if that reference seems completely out of left field, it's because it is... for ME. But not for our science geek Squirt: she loves dinosaurs, and outer space, and Doc McStuffins and - Lord help me - insects.

Oh, and she also loves fairy tales and nursery rhymes, especially those centered on princesses. Because she likes to be consistent like that. And because she likes to drive her Womens' Studies Minor in College Momma Cray-Zee. I tell y'all, if I have to read Little Golden Book's "The Princess and the Pea" one! more! time!, the author may end up as black-and-blue as that princess. I never thought I'd say this, but I much prefer the Tongginator's butterfly stage to Squirt's Cinderella obsession. And no, she's never seen the movie. She loves James Marshall's version of the book.

(I'm wondering if she thinks she has too many chores for a three-year-old.)

The Husband and I are doing well, although we had to deal with another hospitalization this past spring, this time for the husband. He had another bout of pericarditis - same heart thing as last time, except this time his enzyme levels never rose above two, whereas last time they approached thirty. Basically that means this time he didn't Almost! Die!, it was just a major inconvenience for a couple of weeks as we dealt with a short hospital stay and home recovery time.

The good news is that Squirt has not been hospitalized for almost two years now. She narrowly avoided a hospital stay this past November for pneumonia, but several kids in our area came down with pneumonia this past autumn, so it wasn't too terribly concerning. Overall, Squirt's health is great... as long as she's completely gluten-free. We've had one accidental exposure and it was... not fun. She ended up having seizures and dealing with a severe infection that required a fifteen-day round of Leviquin. All from two measly little pretzels.

So we are careful.

And I cook a lot.

Like, a lot a lot.

Which means I won't ever blog like I once did, but I may pop in occasionally to check in with y'all. And because I absolutely love to write. I hope y'all are well. I hope y'all forgive me for killing my blog and then resurrecting it years later. I hope y'all are loving well, and looking forward.

I hope...

月圓, 人圓

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Sun, 30 Sep 2012 01:25:00 +0000

月圓, 人圓

Yuè yuán, rén yuán.

When the moon is round, families unite.

Happy Mid-Autumn Festival, y'all.

Not Mrs. Moe!

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Tue, 25 Sep 2012 07:00:00 +0000

A couple of weeks ago, little Squirt and I ran into a woman I know from church. I've chatted with her a few times and like her as a person, but we are no more than acquaintances. I'm hoping to grow the relationship into a friendship of some sorts, mostly because I like her, but also because her daughter and Squirt will end up in the same grade at school eventually, and - if I'm honest with myself - maybe even a tiny bit because she is Asian-American.

Anyways, back to the day two weeks ago that we ran into her.

Squirt took one look at her and shouted, "Not Mrs. Moe!"

Mrs. Moe is a friend of mine who lived abroad this past year but returned to our neck of the woods over the summer. She is Chinese-American and has three children (Eeny, Meeny and Miney), the youngest of whom was adopted from China. Squirt and Miney belong to a playgroup of four girls, dubbed the Fearsome Four, all adopted from China and with just 13 months separating the oldest (Miney) from the youngest (Squirt). Our four families live within 20 minutes drive of one another, each also have a third grader (three girls, one boy), and all feel pretty darn blessed to have these connections, both for ourselves and our children.

Anyways, back to the day two weeks ago that Squirt took one look at my acquaintance from church and shouted, "Not Mrs. Moe!" Like, five times. Five! times! she shouted it while I quietly sank through the floor. I finally had to come clean and just say it... "I'm sorry. My friend Mrs. Moe is Chinese-American and we saw her last Friday. I think Squirt is realizing that you are both Asian-American, and that you are different people."

My acquaintance from church took it in stride.

At least, I think she did.

(I was too busy sinking through the floor to notice.)

Later I couldn't help but acknowledge that this would not have happened if Squirt had more daily contact with the Asian-American community. I've tried to make conscious decisions about diversity, choosing Asian-American professionals often (such as our dentist, hair stylist, etc.), and seeking out different activities and events that lend themselves to a more diverse crowd. And I know I'm in a better place than I was six years ago - that's for sure - but this incident with Squirt has me questioning if it's enough.

I don't know the answer.

This past weekend, I repeated the "how diverse is your world?" exercise the Husband and I took five years ago at a transracial adoption parenting seminar. The results were much more diverse this second time, but I have to admit that most of my close friends are Caucasian; only three of my close friends are non-white. Then again, I'm pretty introverted, so it's not like my friends list is all that long anyways. But still...

Squirt shouting "Not Mrs. Moe!" showed me that I still have a long way to go.

How about y'all?

I Cannot Believe I...

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Wed, 19 Sep 2012 07:00:00 +0000

I cannot believe I forgot to blog all summer. I had good intentions, of course, but I didn't realize I failed to blog even once. Umm... sorry, y'all?

We are fine. And I've really, truly appreciated the emails and comments some of y'all sent my way, checking in to make sure that Squirt was medically fine and the Tongginator still large and in charge. Everything's been great, well, great *for us* anyways. I think I just got out of the habit of writing and completely... forgot.

(Do y'all think I'm experiencing early-onset menopause?)

(Because I'm thinking maybe.)

To catch y'all up on our lives, I thought I'd compile a list of all of things I never thought I'd do that I've done since June.

1. I read a book to Squirt while sitting on the... you know. Yes, I seriously did. She was whining, and I really had to pee, and she brought me the book, so I just... well.. I read the darn thing. It could have waited another 30 seconds, but it just seemed easier at the time to give in.

2. I signed up for TWO "mommy and Squirt" classes this fall: one music, and one music and movement, with an emphasis on movement. My introverted, tone-deaf, non-athletic self still can't believe I did that. But I did. I'm hoping maybe I'll drop a pound or two before the holidays because of all that "gallop like a pony" and "hope like a frog" ridiculousness. Only I'm using these classes as an excuse to up the chocolate intake, so maybe not. One can wish, however. Even if said wish is completely futile.

3. I watched the Tongginator swim the length of an Olympic-sized swimming pool with NO flotation device. Oh, I nearly cried, y'all. It took almost a dozen private lessons with a swim instructor who specializes in children with needs such as ADHD, autism and sensory processing disorder, but it finally happened! The Tongginator learned to swim! (I am so proud of her.)

4. Several weeks ago, two-year-old Squirt, in response to some (ahem) maternal correction, told me, "Squirt obey SQUIRT!" With all of the language delays we experienced our first ten months home, I sometimes doubted I'd ever hear her say a complete sentence, much less one as sassy as all that.

5. Squirt and I were fired from early intervention services the second week of July. Of course our therapists prefer to use the term "graduated," but what they really mean is "fired." And I'm totally cool with that. Squirt still has some slight gross and fine motor delays, but time and a little bit of effort on my part should resolve them within the next year or two.

6. I attended a celiac parenting support group all! by! myself! this summer and made several new friends. Two of the seven women I met are adoptive parents, and one is an adult adoptee. They made me feel welcome and I don't think I embarrassed myself too badly. Although maybe I did. But as long as I remain clueless about it, I'm totally cool with it.

7. Since the first week of June, I watched Squirt fight off three illnesses, without any need for antibiotics. Which means she is finally developing an effective immune system, y'all. Be still my heart. Seriously. BE STILL MY HEART, y'all.

8. I told the husband it was okay to purchase a new car. Even though I would prefer that he not. How in the world did my tight-fisted, financially cautious self get here? I do not know.

9. I managed to make a half-way decent gluten-free pizza crust. Of course my bread loaves still leave a lot to be desired, but the pizza crust (which is - ahem - flat) tasted pretty darn good.

I'd write a #10, but I can't think of anything. Forgive me for being a bit rusty in the blogging department. And I'd love to know how y'all are doing. I confess I haven't read blogs either this past summer, so I need y'all to fill me in... what's up in your lives?

20 words or less.

Go.

Teaching Shapes Through Songs

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Thu, 28 Jun 2012 12:13:00 +0000

So I promised to share with y'all my Shapes Songs as long as you don't make fun of my voice. Because, well, I'm not known for my singing ability. I mean, it's not horrific or anything, but that's because I did, like, seven takes of this little video until it was as good as it was gonna get.

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In Which I Shameless Brag About Squirt's Smarts

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Wed, 27 Jun 2012 07:00:00 +0000

Squirt is exploding developmentally, and I don't simply mean catching up. She! is! exploding! It's kinda freaky, actually, how fast her little brain is going, but it's wonderful to watch at the same time. (I continue to feel stunned by the changes brought about from a simple dietary switch.)

So what can she do now?
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Birthday Girl

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Mon, 25 Jun 2012 07:00:00 +0000

Tonggu Momma: Squirt, how old are you now?

Squirt: Eight.

Tonggu Momma: Squirt, your sister is eight. How old are you?

Squirt: I tree.

Tonggu Momma: You're not three. You're two. You're two now.

Squirt: Bye bye, One. Hi, two.

We must have had this conversation a half a dozen times this past weekend, y'all. Happy belated birthday to the strongest toddler I know. You have blessed our lives immeasurably this past year. Thank you for being a part of our family.

Thinking Out Loud About Attachment

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Fri, 22 Jun 2012 08:23:00 +0000

Two nights ago my introverted self went out on a limb and attended a support group for parents raising children with celiac and/or gluten-intolerance. I didn't know anyone there when I walked through the doors.

I left knowing I'd made at least two new friends.

I think.

(I mean, maybe they hated my snarky self.)

One of the women is a momma to two children, one biological and one adopted from Russia. Her biological toddler has Celiac. And her adopted five-year-old son? Her adopted son has sensory processing disorder and RAD. I know. I felt like we clicked, for obvious reasons. I think she felt the same, especially since she told me, "I've never met anyone in real life who has struggled with attachment issues before. I mean, I know people on-line, and it helps, but it's blowing my mind to meet someone in real life who has gone through what we are now going through."

She asked me how the Tongginator was doing, seven years later.
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Squirt's Toddler Apps

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Thu, 21 Jun 2012 07:00:00 +0000

Walkerfam 00 asked what toddler apps we used to quiet a restless Squirt. You know, during that "it would have been absolutely horrific without the iPhone" drive to Ocean City. For some strange reason, I feel a bit like I'm leading y'all into sin, but I'll share our favorites anyway. Because I'm evil like that. And because I truly don't think that handing an iPhone to a bored toddler - in rare circumstances - is all that bad of an idea.

Now, if y'all had asked me that six years ago?

When the Tongginator was a toddler?

Oh, my lands, would I have tried to hold back all manner of sanctimonious, judgmental comments. Because OF COURSE you don't hand an expensive gadget to a toddler. And OF COURSE you limit screen time - goodness, a one-year-old shouldn't even have any screen time. And OF COURSE you actively engage said child in finger plays and songs and games of I Spy instead of allowing them to zone out in front of a screen.

Umm... yeah... whatever.

(Oh, how the mighty have fallen.)

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Celiac is Out, and so is Minnesota

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Tue, 19 Jun 2012 07:00:00 +0000

Well, y'all... it's not Celiac. The doctor called two days before we left for our beach vacation to assure us that there is no possible way for Squirt to have Celiac. Not only did her initial blood tests come back negative, but so too did the endoscopy AND the genetic testing.

Which means - despite all evidence to the contrary - she doesn't have Celiac.

But she still has... something.

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What Happens When the Toddler Takes Control of the iPhone

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Mon, 18 Jun 2012 07:00:00 +0000

You live to regret it. And love it. All at the same time.

I didn't blog last week because we headed to Ocean City, Maryland for an extended family vacation. It's about a three hour drive with limited traffic, so it's not terrible. Then again, it's not a fun three hours when a toddler screams the entire trip while the eight-year-old wonders aloud - every sixty seconds - why the toddler won't stop screaming.

Hence the iPhone.
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Gluten-Free Bread Making for a Novice

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Fri, 08 Jun 2012 07:00:00 +0000

I have a confession, y'all. I don't care for Udi's. I know, I know... I must be INSANE, since every! single! person! eating gluten-free seems to love it. Well, except for me. No offense to Udi's or anything, especially since I have never tried it toasted, so maybe I'll experience enlightenment when I finally drop a slice in the toaster. But for right now... not exactly a fan.

Which leaves me striving to make my own homemade gluten-free loaf of sandwich bread.

A couple of y'all asked for the recipe I mentioned in yesterday's post. Well, I found it in a cookbook suggested by one of my 2005 Tonggu travelmates. Her family went gluten-free a little over a year ago and never looked back. When she heard about Squirt's medical issues and my quest for a gluten-free house, she kindly recommended a couple of things right off the bat.
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The Not-So-Perfect Loaf of Bread

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Thu, 07 Jun 2012 09:58:00 +0000

Y'all were so awesome in helping me feel less old, I thought I'd share a slightly humiliating story about myself. The quest for the perfect gluten-free loaf of sandwich bread continues at our house, but I finally perfected the mostly edible gluten-free loaf of sandwich bread.

It took a couple of weeks though.

These last few days, I've been playing around with one recipe that I liked. It tasted good. The consistency felt pretty darn good. But for some reason, I could NOT get that loaf of bread to rise more than three inches in height. Oh my lands, y'all, did I beat myself into a lump of dough trying to figure this out.

Until one day...

(Tuesday)

I realized that my recipe created a one pound loaf. And my bread maker? My bread maker is sized for a two pound loaf. I? Am an idiot.

This concludes your laugh for the day.

(You're welcome.)

2 and 38, 38 and 18

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Mon, 04 Jun 2012 07:00:00 +0000

I barely remember my birthday yesterday because I spent it in a drug-induced haze. No need to break out the cell phones to call our social worker, though. Because the drug? Was Nyquil. I haven't taken Nyquil in a number of years and oh, my lands, y'all, did I forget how much it knocks one on one's tushie.

At least it did me.

I turned 38 yesterday. The Tongginator is eight-years-old and in second grade. Squirt is nearly two, which means she will most likely graduate from high school in 2027, at the age of 17, almost 18. Umm... I'll be 53 by then. My momma? Was 38 when I graduated from high school.

I don't feel old, but I feel like an old momma.

The question is... should I?

A Child's Funeral

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Fri, 01 Jun 2012 07:00:00 +0000

In all honesty, I didn't truly know the sweet young girl our town buried yesterday, but my grief over her death feels as real to me as the grief I felt for Rosie. I met her just a handful of times, but I adore her little brother - formerly Twizzler Boy, now dubbed Opie - and have a friendly acquaintanceship with Opie's mom, Aunt Bea. Aunt Bea and I met during the Tongginator's and Opie's kindergarten year, as we spent many hours volunteering together in Ms. Confetti's classroom. We were inching towards friendship when doctors first diagnosed Opie's then fourteen-year-old sister with brain cancer.

And their life changed.

Profoundly.
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The Roller Skate Dog

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Thu, 31 May 2012 07:00:00 +0000

Just like last year, this past winter all of the children at the Tongginator's elementary school were given the opportunity to write a short story, whether it be fiction or non-fiction, so that the Parent-Teacher Association could "publish" these stories. The children spent several days this spring illustrating their stories before sharing them with classmates and parents this past Friday.

Unfortunately, I missed out, which brought about feelings of guilt and disappointment, but there was little I could do at the time. Doesn't change the fact that the Tongginator's story completely rocked the house. She opted to go the whole fiction route this time, although I'm a-thinking that maybe quite possibly the Tongginator is hoping to turn this fiction story into non-fiction.

Y'all decide.

Tear Soup

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Wed, 30 May 2012 07:00:00 +0000

I can't thank y'all enough for all of the support you have given to our family these past ten months. It means more than I can say. Except for a very few close friends and family, I've received the bulk of my emotional support from y'all. My church family has been great about practical help, especially when we've been in crisis mode, but it's my blogging buddies who have seen me through as I've whined endlessly about all manner of digestive distress, endocrinology enigmas and neurological nightmares.

Heh.

(I'm such a nerd, I know.)

Yes, it helps to write it out. It helps to process it. It helps me to feel more in control. It also helps me to keep things in perspective. Because - as hard as this has been for me and our family - there have been huge blessings that have come about as a result. (More on that sometime soon.) And it helps to remind me that there are so many people out there who are dealing with much greater losses than my doughnut and pasta deficiency.

Take this family, for example.

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Well, I've Never Spent Memorial Day Weekend Like THIS Before

noreply@blogger.com (a Tonggu Momma) — Tue, 29 May 2012 07:00:00 +0000

Squirt is giving me grey hair. I mean, she is really, truly giving me grey! hair!, y'all.
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