Outrageous Blog

My son has a potty mouth

Johnny Outrageous — Fri, 17 Oct 2008 04:48:30 +0000

My six year old son is learning to read. Yesterday he pointed at a picture in a zoo book and said, 'Look at this! It's a frickin' elephant!' I took a deep breath, then asked...'What did you call it?' 'It's a frickin' elephant! It says so on the picture!' And so it did..... ' A f r i [...]

A Good Use For The Hadron Collider

Johnny Outrageous — Mon, 13 Oct 2008 19:50:29 +0000

Finally a good use is found for the Hadron Collider.

Humor - TIME TO REVAMP YOUR PORTFOLIO & LIQUID ASSETS

Johnny Outrageous — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 05:38:20 +0000

TIME TO REVAMP YOUR PORTFOLIO & LIQUID ASSETS If you had purchased $1,000 of shares in Delta Airlines one year ago, you will have $49.00 today. If you had purchased $1,000 of shares in AIG one year ago,you will have $33.00 today. If you had purchased $1,000 of shares in Lehman Brothers one year ago, you [...]

Office Humor, or kidding on the square?

Johnny Outrageous — Wed, 08 Oct 2008 16:37:39 +0000

EFFECTIVE AUGUST 1, 2008 NEW OFFICE POLICY Dress Code: 1) You are advised to come to work dressed according to your salary. 2) If we see you wearing Prada shoes and carrying a Gucci bag, we will assume you are doing well financially and therefore do not need a raise. 3) If you dress poorly, you need to learn to manage [...]

Political Correctness In America - Served With Humor

Johnny Outrageous — Thu, 03 Jul 2008 20:00:44 +0000

Due to the climate of political correctness now pervading America , Kentuckians, [...]

Funny Nutritional Advice…. From Doctor Johnny Outrageous!

Johnny Outrageous — Fri, 20 Jun 2008 19:15:13 +0000

Q:I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life; is this true? A:Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that 's it... don't waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can extend the life of your car by driving [...]

Stop Buying Penis Enlargement Pills, Creams, Lotions, Potions and Pumps

Johnny Outrageous — Sat, 03 May 2008 16:50:54 +0000

All you small penis owners need to listen up. NOTHING you rub on it will make your penis larger! Okay, it will make it grow, but not beyond your normal boner size. All that stuff is simply a way to separate a fool from his money. If you really need a bigger penis, you will [...]

I’m part of the new white minority

Johnny Outrageous — Fri, 02 May 2008 15:46:44 +0000

It’s that time of year and the carnival has come to town. I loaded my kids up and away we went. The lines were terribly long this year and it seemed everything we wanted to do meant we had to wait 15 - 20 minutes before we could begin. A great time was had by [...]

Schools, a Breeding Ground for Stupidity.

Johnny Outrageous — Thu, 01 May 2008 16:32:01 +0000

I was dropping my kids off at school this morning when I noticed the sign they had posted in front of the school. The 15 foot sign read: “Inspiration and Genius are the same thing” My offical response to the school and to all those who conspired to erect this sign: “Stupid people get inspired to do stupid things [...]

Why Gas Prices Are So High… OUTRAGEOUS PICTURES

Johnny Outrageous — Sun, 30 Mar 2008 01:35:34 +0000

Brace yourself…. This is fracking Insane (Yes… fracking… I love Battle Star Galactica) Construction on this this thing is finally complete. As you can imagine it has taken years to build something of this magnatitude. This is what it looks like now that is completed. Notice how small those 12 - 16 foot tall palm trees appear [...]

The Village Idiot - George Bush - Ruler Of The Most Powerful Nation On Earth - VIDEO

Johnny Outrageous — Thu, 13 Mar 2008 16:27:39 +0000

English does not appear to be George Bush’s first…second… or even third language. Seriously… How could you dipshits elect this man to run the USA? I didn’t vote for him. I told everyone he was an idiot. SURE …. NOW you all agree. Now that you elected him and RE-ELECTED him…. it took you 7 years to [...]

Back Up! Jodie Sweetin is about to Bust Out of her top!

Johnny Outrageous — Wed, 12 Mar 2008 17:31:23 +0000

Stephanie Tanner showed up to the launch of the Pink Taco restaurant in Los Angeles with a full house to show off her massive new funbags. Yes… this is the boobs first public appearance. I can still remember when she was 8-years-old and asking Bob Saget about puberty. ha ha ha Inside sources say that [...]

Monthly Payments Screw Us!

Johnny Outrageous — Tue, 11 Mar 2008 06:21:15 +0000

You probably have noticed by now that you get paid for every 2 weeks of work. If the month is longer… you make more money… if it’s shorter… you make less money. Because you get paid by the hour… or BY THE DAY. BUT My rent (or mortgage payment) is due BY THE MONTH. They don’t care [...]

Victim Of The Old Gay Soap Trap

Johnny Outrageous — Thu, 06 Mar 2008 00:04:56 +0000

I got a good workout today at the YMCA. I swam 20 laps and just about every muscle in my body was aching. After my swim, I limped my sorry ass back to the showers singing the words to I’m coming out by Diana Ross. I was soaping up my hair because I am [...]

Vote on which company in America sucks the most!

Johnny Outrageous — Sun, 02 Mar 2008 08:48:59 +0000

I voted and you should to. VOTE ON WHO SUCKS HERE It was tough for me to pick between AT&T (for spying on us citizens for the gov.) or Comcast (for screwing us all on net neutrality) or Bank of America (for stealing money from me every month for over a year) In the end, Bank of [...]

The RIAA is Coming For YOU - Funny Pic

Johnny Outrageous — Sat, 01 Mar 2008 21:02:41 +0000

Windows Vista Sucks My Nuts! - Again!

Johnny Outrageous — Fri, 29 Feb 2008 22:26:50 +0000

I am a power user. I have a lot of windows open on my computer at the same time. I usually use nothing but the best computers from CustomPerfect.com but they don’t build laptops, and today I am working on my crappy Gateway laptop. If I had a choice in the matter, I would [...]

My Mom’s Diary Revealed! -Funny Humor Of A 40 Something Woman!

Johnny Outrageous — Fri, 29 Feb 2008 18:30:50 +0000

Keep in mind, this is my mom’s personal diary! My sister bought my mom a week of personal training at one of our local gyms. This is my moms week long diary entries. Try not to laugh — to hard! Dear Diary, For my birthday this year, my daughter (the dear) purchased a week of [...]

Outrageous - Moding A DeLorean With A Mac

Johnny Outrageous — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 07:37:43 +0000

Okay, this is just insane! I love it!This is the ultimate computer mod! Computer Mod Pictures Here

Why There Will Never Be Peace In The Middle East!

Johnny Outrageous — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 00:16:59 +0000

I was at a coffeehouse the other day and overheard a conversation between a father and his son. The son, who appeared to be home from college, asked his dad, “Do you think there will be peace in the Middle East?” The father put down his paper and said, “You can’t get along with your mother, [...]