With this year being a Presidential election year here in the United States, more and more people are following the issues and the political process which I think is a good thing. But as a result of this, many people are sharing their thoughts and opinions on particular issues which is within their right as far as I’m concerned. The big question is whether or not it’s the smart thing to do.

At least over here, the political climate is what I describe as “toxic.” Twenty years ago, senators and representatives would fight it out with each other on the floor of the capital building but then afterwards, go out for dinner or drinks together, leaving their political affiliations at the door. Today, that’s not the case. Our representatives in congress keep to themselves or their own parties (yes, there are a few that reach across the aisle and befriend “the enemy”). When one party proposes something, even if it’s something good, the other party either picks it apart or shoots it down.

Unfortunately, this lack of tolerance has spread outside of the Washington beltway. I’ve seen some pretty nasty squabbles between people in situations such as public restaurants, during their kids’ sporting events and of course, online during interactions on Twitter and Facebook.

Every now and then I’ve been tempted to post my thoughts on a particular issue – and believe me, I have a lot of thoughts and strong opinions on things. But I’ve resisted because of this environment. I vent enough about things to people in real life so I don’t feel the need to vent online. However, sometimes I do feel the need to respond.

Many people see social media as their outlet to act like a spoiled six year old. Because they are not directly talking to someone they feel that they can get away with being condescending, arrogant and immature. I often find people preaching tolerance for new ideas one moment and hypocritically calling for the heads of anyone that doesn’t agree with them the next moment.

I’ve long since stopped airing my political beliefs publicly, but back when I did I tried an interesting experiment. A local news site had a forum for political issues and I’d frequently post there. I found that arguing with people rarely changes their opinions. In fact, it has the opposite effect – it makes their beliefs stronger. So I changed my tune and used my human relation skills instead to have civilized discussions.

Rather than telling people they were dumb or wrong, I’d ask them why they felt the way they did and politely explained my position. Within a week of this, many of the people that I had considered enemies became friends. We would discuss the issues but we also started getting off topic – we would often talk about things that we each liked. We wouldn’t always agree politically, but we respected each other.

Two examples come to mind. In one case, a woman who I had previously battled with over a particularly controversial issue logged in simply so she could share that she had finally landed a job she was pursuing. She wanted to thank me for some advice and I was thrilled for her. It was hard to imagine that only a few weeks prior to that we completely disliked each other.

The next incident occurred where I posted, without a lot of information, that I was simply against an upcoming law. Someone replied back with a very personal attack and before I even saw it, another person who I had previously battled with jumped in to condemned the personal attack. He said that while he may not agree with my stance on the issue, that I deserved better than such a personal attack.

So the bottom line here is to take the high road and resist stooping to others’ levels. You’re more likely to be taken seriously if you respect the ideas and opinions of others rather than trying to humiliate them.

Related posts:

1. A quick note about politics
2. Public Speaking Success: Five Ways to Turn a Boring Talk into an Interesting Talk
3. Quality: The Most Essential Ingredient of Your Online Presence
4. Three Painless Ways to Avoid “The Boring Talk”

One of the benefits of improving your speaking skills is that you can actually uses these skills to make money, even a living. It’s a great way to put your speaking skills to use and can be rewarding in more ways than just monetarily. If you feel comfortable speaking to groups, becoming a professional speaker can be quite lucrative provided that there are people willing to pay to hear what you have to say.

Professional speakers can make money a number of different ways. We’ll talk about some of them, both the obvious and not so obvious.

Speaker Fees:

This is the most obvious way that speakers make money but it’s also the most difficult. When you first start out, you need to build your brand and get your name and message out there. Often to do this, you need to start by speaking for free hoping that each free gig leads to another gig that is either a paid one or one that puts you one step closer to speaking to a group where someone in the audience might consider paying you.

Some people say that you need to speak to between 50 and 100 audiences (not including Toastmasters clubs) to finally land a paid speaking gig, but I believe that number is significantly less. If this turns you off, don’t let it. It’s good for new speakers to start off giving free speeches so that they can work out any issues with their talks without the pressure of delivering a paid talk. There’s less pressure on you when you’re not getting paid for a talk than there is when you’re getting paid $1000 – however, that doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t put forth your best effort.

You can further reduce the number of free speeches you need to give by speaking to groups where members of the audience have an interest in your topic and the ability to bring you in to speak. This means finding audiences that may include potential buyers. Depending on your topic, it may be to a local conference related to your area of expertise or it could be a small business organization. Clubs like Rotary or Lions are a great place to start and depending on your area and the size of the club, may contain buyers in the audience.

Product Sales:

This is the second most popular stream of income for speakers and for some, it’s their biggest source. Products are easier to create today than they ever were. In the past, you’d need to go into a recording studio to record an audio program or connect with a publisher to create your first book. Today, you can purchase a small voice recording device (if you have a smart phone, you might already have this capability) or a microphone for your computer and create an audio program that you can sell on CD and/or digitally.

If you have an idea for a book, there are a number of services out there that take a document created in one of the many common word processing formats and turn it into a printed book or electronic book (ebook). Many of these services have no upfront costs and only charge you a percentage of the sale.

Coaching:

Reduce the audience size for your program down to one and you now have a coaching program. Many speakers offer to work one on one with people in need of their expertise. Even though you’re working with a smaller audience, keep in mind that coaching can be more challenging because you need to be able to help that person with their own particular needs. The most challenging part of a speech is the question and answer session and coaching is essentially one giant question and answer session with some prepared material as the basis for the session. But if done right, coaching can be an effective and rewarding source of income to speakers.

Website Revenue:

There are three ways speakers make money with their websites. The first one is to sell their own products and services through their web sites. This may require some extensive knowledge in web technologies or tools such as a shopping cart. One major benefit of this is that it can greatly increase your reach. The downside of this is that you’re among the millions of sites competing for people’s attention.

The second option is to sell other people’s products and/or services for a commission – this is known as an affiliate program. The upside of this is that the person who’s services you’re selling often has the sales mechanism in place so all you need to do is refer people to their website and you collect a small commission. And on top of that, you don’t have to go through the trouble of creating your own products. The downside is that you make less money per sale.

The last method is through advertising. This typically means that you display advertisements for other sites on your site and you make money when someone clicks on an ad. It’s much harder to make money through advertisements these days because most people either automatically ignore ads or they use software to block them. The other downside is that you’re redirecting people to someone else’s site, often for just a few pennies. Still, if you can get enough traffic to your website, it can represent a decent income stream for you.

So these are the four basic ways speakers can make money. If you’re just starting out, consider which options will work out best for you. There are speakers that make their living from just one of these methods while others use all four. It’ll take time for you to figure out which methods work best for you, but you’ll never know until you try.

Related posts:

1. Can a Book or Audio Program Make You a Better Speaker?
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3. Transitioning From Toastmaster to Professional Speaker
4. Don’t Be a Matt Foley Speaker

I see a lot of motivational quotes from my friends on the various social media services that are related to living life to its fullest or making the most out of your day. Thinking like this is a great attitude to have but it is one of those things that are easier said than done. After all, we often get caught up with our day to day tasks and by the time we get around to making the most out of our day, it’s practically time for bed.

I’ve been thinking a lot about this lately because I definitely haven’t been living life to its fullest. I’ve been living in more of a reactive mode where my life feels like an endless pile of papers and lists of tasks that I need to get to. So of course, fun has taken a back seat. So out of frustration (which can be a fantastic motivator), I’ve created a list of seven things that we can all do to make the most out of our lives.

1. Wake up with the right attitude.

To get the most out of your day, you need to wake up in the right mood. If your first thought when your alarm goes off is “crap, I need to go to my stupid job!” then you’re starting your day in a manner that sets you up for misery. Consider how you wake up on a day when you’re leaving for vacation on while you’re on vacation. You’re probably excited, imagining all the fun you’ll be having and all the exciting things you’ll be doing.

The trick is to do this every day. As soon as you wake up, think about the good things that you can look forward to that day. It can be something big like going out with friends after work or something small like your dog running to greet you when you get home. Try to think about three things each morning (and they can be the same things from day to day) like this – and, if you need a little help think about them the night before, write them down on a sticky note and put it on your alarm.

2. Do something that makes you feel good about yourself.

We spend far too much time beating ourselves up over the things that we do wrong. It could be anything from smoking to overeating to giving in to being lazy. Life is not easy and we live in stressful times so it’s easy to succumb to our vices. So instead of focusing on the bad things that you do, try to do something that makes you feel better about yourself. This can be something as simple as dressing up so you look your best (even if you don’t receive any complements, it’ll boost your confidence), hitting the gym, making a healthy meal substitution at lunch or complete a task that’s been lingering on your to do list that bothers you.

3. Reward yourself.

Again, we live in a stressful and highly competitive society so it’s easy to fall into the trap where we’re focused on all of the things we need to do and leave little (if any) time for things we want to do. Make a list of treats (or guilty pleasures) for yourself and reward yourself every day. It can be food related (just remember to keep it in moderation or you’ll regret it), playing video games, goofing off on social media, reading for pleasure or anything else you enjoy. If you don’t take time out and treat yourself from time to time, you’ll start to resent your goals and the work you do. So treat yourself from time to time.

4. Minimize your time with negative people.

Negativity is as contagious as yawning. When you’re in a group of people that’s complaining, it’s hard not to feel the same way and join it. That’s why it’s important to avoid them as much as possible. If you spend your lunch complaining about your job with your coworkers, it might feel good to get things off of your chest but how will you feel the rest of the day? In this case, you may want to consider eating with a different group or finding an activity to do during lunch that puts you in a better mood such as exercising or reading. Again, this is easier said than done because sometimes you have no way of completely avoiding the negative people in your life so try to do this over time. For example, skip one lunch with the pity partiers each week for three weeks and then start skipping two. Or communicate with negative people via email rather than in person or over the phone.

5. Spend more time with positive people.

Again, we all live in different situations so not all of us have clubs of positive people that meet every day near where we live or work. But you probably have noticed that some people that you interact with day to day seem to be more positive than others. Try to spend more of your time around these people rather than those that always talk negatively. In the event that you don’t have people in your life that are positive, use social media to connect with people with the right attitude. Twitter is full of people that post nothing but inspirational quotes and Facebook and LinkedIn each have groups for people who are positive minded.

6. Watch your language.

What you say, whether you mean it or not, has a lot to do with how you feel. If you find yourself putting a negative spin on things or taking down about people, stop it. When asked about something, try to always find something positive about the situation no matter how bad it is. So if a project is behind schedule, you could say something like “at least we’re realizing it now so we have time to adjust and minimize the problem.” Again, it’s tempting to add to the misery when people are talking down about something so it’s often better to say nothing at all.

7. Watch your body language.

Smile. Smile again. Keep smiling. It’s very difficult to be upset or angry when you have a big grin on your face. Try it. There’s a lot to be said about body language and how it affects others around you, but the simplest thing to do is smile. About ten years ago, I was waiting in line at a supermarket and the people in front of me caused all sorts of problems (they were arguing over ten cents on a number of items) which was annoying me to the point where I wanted to scream. A college-aged woman got in line behind me and she smiled and said “hi” to me, despite the annoyed scowl on my face. She instantly changed my mood and we had a nice conversation while we waited. Her simple act not only kept her from being annoyed at a frustrating situation, but she also brought me around.

If you have trouble making yourself smile, think of something funny or watch a funny movie. I chose the photo at the beginning of this post because it reminds me of a fun time at a fun place (even though I had gotten laid off a week before that photo was taken). So think of fun and happy memories.

Moving from a negative attitude to a more positive one takes time and effort so don’t beat yourself up if you catch yourself chiming in on a pity party or sulking because something didn’t go your way. The key to any change is to make gradual shifts so that you develop positive habits. And it’s okay to be negative or upset at times. Things like a job loss or loss of a loved one often require a period of mourning. While there are people that are able to keep positive during even the toughest of times, not everyone can easily get to that point. You know you better than anyone else does, so if going cold turkey and just eliminating all negativity from your life works starting right now works for you, then go for it. Otherwise, take it in strides and make small but constant changes. I recommend starting with the first point of waking up with the right attitude as that will help you lay a strong foundation for a positive day.

Related posts:

1. Inspiration: Life is Too Short
2. One More Mailbox
3. My Will to Live, R.I.P.
4. Nighttime Courage

Speech contests are a huge part of Toastmasters and can be interesting to watch. While I’ve never competed, I’ve had the pleasure of acting as contest master and chief judge (on separate occasions, of course) and have really enjoyed being a part of them. But the big question about speech contests is whether or not it’s worth all the time and effort.

Like anything, it really depends on your goals. I know people that make thousands of dollars for each speaking engagement they do, yet have never participated in a speaking contest. I also know of people who have won the Toastmasters World Championship of Public Speaking that haven’t been able to leverage their win to create a successful speaking career. But on the flip side, I know people that haven’t participated in contests that have struggled to make a career out of speaking and people that have won contests and have done well for themselves. And of course, there are thousands of us in between.

I don’t believe that winning a speech contest means you’re a phenomenal speaker. As I’ve discussed in prior posts, I don’t have a lot of faith in the way the contests are judged – mainly because I disagree with the type of people that typically judge Toastmasters speech contests about what constitutes a good speech. But two incidents particularly negatively affected my opinion on speech contests.

The first incident was at a district speech contest where I felt the winner won because of the triumph she described in her speech rather than the quality of the speech itself. The second incident was when I was area governor and chief judge at my area speech contest. I noticed something that I had suspected for a while – that there are some people that will vote for who they like (such as a friend or fellow club member) rather than for who gave the best speech. I’m not saying that this happens all of the time, but I’m not confident that the contest winner is the best speaker, or has even given the best speech in that particular contest.

With all that being said, doing well in the contest world takes a lot of effort and sometimes a lot of luck as well. The process of creating a speech, practicing it to ensure it meets the time limit (which is probably the most important lesson of participating in a speech contest) and dealing with the result, good or bad, is certainly valuable. Focusing your time and effort just to tell potential clients that you won a speech contest, might not be the best use of your time.

Does the title matter?

Truthfully, being able to tell people that I’m a World Champion of Public Speaking would be a huge plus since I teach people public speaking skills and people are impressed by awards and titles. The fact that I’m not a World Champion of Public Speaking doesn’t harm me as I’ve taught these skills for over five years now and I have a number of success stories that I can share from people that I have worked with. But the title would definitely help.

As much as I hate to admit it, people just aren’t excited about public speaking. If you’re in sales or another line of work that requires you to give presentations, it might impress your boss and/or your coworkers but it won’t help you much with your customers. They care about what you’re pitching to them, not how good a speaker you are.

Confidence

Winning a contest is a great boost for your confidence – there’s nothing like going up against some great speakers and coming out on top. Losing, on the other hand can be a different story. Losing a contest to someone better than you can be an eye opener and may motivate you to become a better speaker. Losing to someone that you think isn’t that good, or worse, feeling like you were robbed, can destroy your motivation. So it really depends on your personality.

Popularity

There’s no better shortcut to the top in Toastmasters than winning speech contests. If you want to become a household name in your area or want something to put on your “resume” to help you run for a district office, than speech contest success will definitely help you.

One thing that amazes me is how few people outside of Toastmasters have heard of the organization. This can work to your advantage (“my speech was the best in the whole area”) if you spin it a bit. But don’t be shocked when you tell a potential client or employer about a big win and they think that Toastmasters has something about making toast (the kind with bread).

The Verdict

Like anything, it really depends on your goals. If you can leverage your contest success so that it translates to success in other areas, then by all means go for it. Otherwise, focus that time and effort on something that will help move you closer to your goals.

Also keep in mind that the judging of speech contests is very subjective and what constitutes a good speech to the judges of a contest may not necessarily be something you could deliver to a paid audience. In all of the contests I’ve seen, I can’t think of any speech that jumps out at me as something that someone would pay for (even if extended to keynote length). However on the flip side, many of the contest participants I’ve seen are good enough speeches that they have been hired to give speeches on their area of expertise. So look at your own situation and decide whether participating in a speech contest is something worth trying.

Related posts:

1. Public Speaking Success: Four Speaking Experts Worth Checking Out
2. Public Speaking Success: How to Give a Great Speech
3. How to Hire a Toastmaster For a Speech
4. Toastmasters Success – Taking Your Speaking to the Next Level