Ozark Follies

Hello?

2010-04-27T08:11:00.002-06:00

Hello?
Is anyone out there?
Can you hear me now?
Ground control to Major Tom?
Yoooou Whoooo!

Can it possibly be that It's been 2 years since I posted?
I do believe that I completely forgot that I even had a blog!
...Let alone trying to remember the password to access it!
Darn you Facebook! Oh how you woo'd me!
I need help. I bet there is a 12 step program out there for this addiction.

Well, if there is anyone still out there who is still signed up for notifications for this Follie of mine, or just happens to stumble upon this by mere chance.....
I say
HELLO!
Howdy!
Hola.

Wow, 2 years. That's Eight, count them 8, seasons! That's like 50 tornado sightings, 6 months of snow, 10,000 chigger/tick bites, and 2 deer seasons... ago.
So much has changed, and so much is still the same.

We are still here on our remote hill top just outside of our town. City Boy is still working, by the grace of God, and I'm still busy , if not more, than ever.

Big Dog is a senior this year. He graduates in a couple of days. He's still tall. So far he's topped out a 6'5". Let's just say step ladders are not needed in this house as long as he's around. Which won't be long! Big Dog joined the Navy and will ship out in October.

Barbie Girl is really growing up. She's 11 now (and can I just say for the record...a total drama queen) Things finally came to a head at the school and I finally had to say enough was enough. Between the constant battle with strep throat and other illnesses, the LICE and the failing to help her with her learning issues.....not that any single one of these weren't enough.....I bit the bullet. I jumped into the depths of the unknown. I rested it all in God's hands.....and I chose to Homeschool Barbie Girl. ( hence my " more busy than ever" comment) But ,praise be to God, She has not had a single case of strep throat or Lice since we started homeschooling and she's managed to complete 1 years worth of learning in 1/3 of the time. That's not say it's all been rosie. Spending 24/7 with a drama queen does grate your nerves. I do believe I've spent more money on Advil, and have more gray hair, since we've started.

We still have our critters. Chickens, ducks, dogs....but we also have some new members to the Funny Farm. COWS. Yep. Bovine beauties. Milk makers. Steak givers. Wonderful, Amazing, gorgeous Black/brown Cows. Job # 250 Keeping or Cows. In another year we'll add Milker of Cow to that list of job titles.

Listening to Barbie Girl singing "Victory In Jesus" in the shower reminds me of another thing that has happened around here. We had the sheer joy of seeing BOTH kids baptized. God has been good to us and we are grateful and thankful for His faithfulness is taking care of His children during these tough times. And out church family has been an amazing source of comfort and support and a glorious blessing to our family.

Things around here are still the same, but there has been a great change.
We're still here.
Kids are still kids.
We still have critters.
and I'm still learning how to live out here.
BUT...
God has kept City Boy working
God has allowed my children to thrive and prosper educationally
God has added to our farm and provided us a means to keep them fed
God has allowed me to continue to stay at home

Do you see the change?
If not, I'll give you a hint.
It's the First word of the last four sentences.

Yes, we, as a family, have put HIM first in our lives and He has blessed us for it.

So if anyone is still out there, let it be known that change can be good.
But for now, it's time to start taking my Advil...er I mean, start school for the day, and then smile because I remember I have a coupon for Clairol hair coloring.

Blackberries....and B---?

2008-09-04T06:58:00.005-06:00

OK So I don't have any pictures yet....It's taking longer than I thought to get this new computer all dialed in and my programs straightened out....plus fighting the guys for it ( new toy, they must play) and let's not EVEN begin to talk about how Vista won't let you play ANY of your old CD games..ACK! City Boy now mad that we ever got the darn thing cause he can't play any of his shoot 'em up games.

So until I get some pictures going I'll leave you with this story.........

Blackberries.....City Boy LOVES them. I mean L-O-V-E loves them. And he loves for me to make blackberry cobbler. And because I love City Boy, I make it for him. Simple enough right?

We just happen to live in a place that blackberries grow wild. So in my mind that's a win-win thing.
Now I have a love-hate relationship with blackberries. And it swings back and forth depending on what I'm doing. I love making cobbler for City Boy and seeing him smile....I hate the stains left behind cause... it.... is ....messy.

But seeing as how they're practically FREE around here and Me being into the whole farming -living off the land-mentality ( key word there is MENTAL) I thought I take the kids with me out blackberry pickin'.

I had mentioned to one of our friends about wanting some blackberries. They offered to let us pick some from some patches they knew about growing on their property.
Now, these are WILD blackberries mind you. Not some greenhouse nursery THORN LESS variety with berries the size of golf balls....Nope, just wild falling bramble with thorn ready to suck your blood and rip your clothes and claim you for their prey.
No, really. They ARE.

But I digress,
So with the plan all set up, the kids and I were going to meet our friend early one morning and she would take us to all the patches she knew about. So the kids and I prepared.

Jeans. check.

Boots ( there might be snakes) check.

Long sleeved shirts ( ugh it's August) check.

Gloves. Check.

Bags. check.

Bucket. check.

Bug spray ( ticks) check.

All set and we're off.

We have just finished with a hot spell and this was one of the first "cool-er" mornings and with long sleeve shirts we were thankful.
When we got to the first blackberry patch we found that the heat spell hadn't been very kind to the blackberries. Most of the vines were dried out and brown with loads of dried blackberries still on them, BUT towards the MIDDLE of the patch it was still green and there were blackberries to be had.

So Big Dog, Barbie girl and I put on our protective gear, grabbed a bag and in a last minute thought applied bug spray to our ankles and waist lines to keep the tick from crawling in our clothes.
The bramble was waist high and Big Dog and I ventured our way as far into the middle as we could while I had Barbie girl pick in an area closer to the outside. I didn't want her to get stuck in the bramble and not be able to get out and those thorns HURT.

We picked all that we could reach. I had taken the glove off of my pickin' hand for dexterity reasons and by now my thumb and first few fingers we a lovely shade of fuchsia.
Having picked all we could, we moved on over to another location and met with the same scene. Dried out patches and very little blackberries.
Not to be discouraged we picked and moved to another location and picked all that we could and finally called it quits.

The kids and I went home, changed clothes and started washing and sorting our bounty. We managed to bring home a total of five cups of blackberries. Meager by any stretch of the imagination but just enough to bake ONE blackberry cobbler for City Boy. Washed, dried, flash frozen and waiting for that special time the black berries were finished and we could see the prize of our hard work. But Our REAL surprise came later. About midnight that night.

After such a morning and all the work after, not to mention summer, with two kids at home all day, by the time evening rolled about I was tired, so I flopped into bed and promptly went to sleep.
Around midnight.....I woke up from an itch. Nothing new here. Mosquito capital of the world. But this was different. My belly, groin area ( I mean ALL of it), thighs, legs..were all on fire from itching. I got up and walked to the bathroom. Dropped my pajama pants and gasped.

From my waist down to my toes I was covered in red bumps that itched like there was no tomorrow. I did the best mental evaluation I possibly could at midnight and concluded that NO, I did not have the chicken pox, mumps and measles were ruled out , poison ivy was eliminated too. Then it struck me as I heard the other bathroom door open and close. Dear God, I'm not the only one itching. It can mean only one thing.

CHIGGERS.

In my city girl wisdom, and LACK of country girl knowledge, I recalled that before berry picking the kids and I only sprayed our waist line and ankles for TICKS. It did not even cross my mind to be concerned with CHIGGERS and so unknowing exposed our vulnerable and evidently tasty bodies to the lunch menu of the most vile bugs on earth, chiggers. They must have see us coming and true lunch buffet for all.

Now, chiggers for any of you who are unfamiliar with them, as I used to be, never having had to deal with them in So CA, are a mite. The adults are called red bugs ( real original) and the infants are chiggers. Chiggers get on you, through your clothes or whatever , nothing stops these little buggers and they bite you. They leave an itching bump that will bother the dead. And it lasts and lasts and lasts for MONTHS. As the days go on they do itch less and less, but not enough and certainly not soon enough.
Mind you this was early August, It's now early Sept and I STILL have them and they STILL itch.
Worse yet, both of the kids were suffering too. So now here we are, Suffering, horribly and to make matters worse, after we counted, we came home with more chigger bites than blackberries!

City Boy still hasn't gotten his blackberry cobbler yet. I can't go to the freezer and look at them with out itching.
The kids are healing faster than I am, but that's OK. they whine more.
Blackberries and I still have a Love - hate relationship and right now the pendulum is stuck at HATE.
I'm sure and the itching and memories fade I'll love 'em again, and City Boy will get his cobbler, maybe.

Lesson learned? Check.
V.

M.I.A.

2008-08-26T08:54:00.005-06:00

Wow! have I been MIA

Things have gotten so busy and top that with two...count them TWO complete computer crashes the last one finally managing to get me a new computer and hence back online to write again. Of course school having started last week does help ALOT!
FREEDOM AT LAST!

So...November, huh? I left you hangin' since November. Man, am I a slacker.

So let's see. December netted us Snow, more snow and ice.

So kids were out of school for winter fun. Christmas came and went and Barbie girl did surprisingly well with getting only homemade gifts...good thing too it'll be the same this year also.

Had another birthday in January *sigh* Barbie girl is starting to wonder why I have birthdays but every year we tell her I still 25. Wonder what she'll think when she can finally do the math. She had a birthday too, by the way. She's now 9.

In March we started having problems with our neighbors. BIG Problems. Let's just say the cops were called out, I no longer watch the L kids and we don't wave to anyone on this road anymore. Since then the L Family has moved out. I pray daily that the other will leave as well.
In the midst of all the discord, Big Dog came to live with us!

Boy, was that a stressful thing, Trying to get the paperwork filed in So Ca from HERE, when he's was still in Tenn. UGH! Lots of prayer and determination. And God pulled it off. I drove to Arkansas to meet him while the rest of his family were moving from Tenn. back to So Ca.

I was actually worried abut being able to get to him because of all the rains we have had, but that particular day it held off raining until after we had gotten back home. We have had the wettest year on record so far and all the flooding we saw sure convinced me of that. It's rained so much that it flooded under our house. We only found out about it when it shorted out the water well controls that are under the house. I sent City Boy under there to see what was up cause we had no water he came back reporting that there was about a foot of water under the house. So we had to go buy a sump pump to pump it out. After that, anytime it rains I have to go check if it flooded or not. You see, there is an underground river, under the bedrock, under our house. Our house was built during severe drought years, so no one knew it was there. But this year the rains were so high that the underground river filled until it seeped up through the ground, right under our house. Ahhh, the joys of living in the country!

We registered Big Dog in high school asap and he was able to complete the last quarter of the school year here. We really are thankful that we have such a small community here. Most of the people, that work at the school ,go to our church and the high school Principal is also in my Sunday school class. It's nice to know that we have extra eyes looking out for him and Barbie girl.

We've had a few new additions here on the farm and a few losses. Spring time brought us a few young roosters, which promptly entered freezer camp shortly after learning how to crow and a couple of new hens. In April we lost one of our girl ducks, Super Duck. In sorrow and anguish to that loss I immediately put 3 duck eggs under the first broody chicken I found. Later we were blessed with two new baby ducklings . As cute as it was I really should have known better. I happened to stumble upon a hidden duck nest in one of our burn piles and it had about 13 duck eggs in it, ( it's hard to make a living selling eggs if your employees are hiding all the inventory!) but in a moment of sheer stupidity I put all 13 of those duck eggs under a broody chicken. The good Lord blessed us again 22 days later and we now have 10 ducklings running around long with the original ducks and the 2 rebound ducks. Having lost yet another female duck just the other day to a coyote ( RIP Notch) and City Boy having sent one to the freezer camp ( it couldn't get it through his head he was a duck, NOT a rooster and my chicken hens hated him) I believe we now have a total of ...da da tada..... 15 ducks! I lost a few chickens here and there, one to a hawk and one to the rooster/duck, yea..don't ask but all in ll things are good. Our biggest (and will be bigger) addition is our new PUPPY.
"Gabby" is only a couple of months old now, but she will be HUGE. She's a Great Pyrenees. We got her for the sole purpose of guarding the chickens, but so far she's just been a house dog. Damn, my soft heart.
As for the rest of us, well City Boy and I have started becoming very active in our church and I am the Church Librarian ( no snickering please) and I help out in the kitchen during our bi monthly church dinners, City Boy helps out with odd jobs and helps with the serving at the dinners, Big Dog works with the youth group and helps out the with media equipment during Sunday services and weds. night youth group. Barbie Girl just has fun.
She's just started the 3rd grade and I believe that this will be a good year for her also. Big Dog is now a Junior. We looked at class rings for him this week. And at the moment he's thinking real serious about joining the Navy when he graduates. I pray he does. I feel it will be the very best choice he ever made. City Boy is working hard as ever, which is great considering the housing crunch, he works around here breaking his tractor and trying to fix it and helping out our friends who live on the NEXT road.
City Boy and I had a great time helping our friends with their cattle. We helped to sort, tag, vaccinate, and castrate about 18 calves. Good times, good times. It was dirty, smelly, sweaty, hard work and I'd do it again in a heart beat. We've offered to help them with their miles and miles of fence mending that needs to be done because of the Great Ice Storm of 2007 and as a thank you they've given us a cow, that we had butchered. City Boy named the cow "Barbie" short for Bar-B-Q. So now every night the family asks... " Are we eating Barbie for dinner?" or "is this meat Barbie?" To an outside this has gotta sound strange if not wrong on many levels, but for us it's just funny.

Well, Fall is right around the corner, and the garden is just about done. The chores are still plentiful and there are lots of projects to start and lots left to finish. the Almanac is predicting a very cold and snowy winter for us this year so I think I had better start my winter preps sooner than planned.

I guess that's it for right now. I promise, promise PROMISE to write more....and soon. I've got to reload some programs on this new computer so I can get my pictures back, when I have it up and running I've got some great pictures to show you.
TTFN
V.

life in a nutshell...or acorn? part 2 November

2007-11-30T08:56:00.000-06:00

I'm back. Did you miss me?

When we last left this story I left you hanging onto the edge of your seat just waiting to see what the month of November brought us.

Ahhh. November. The glorious month that brings on the transition from Fall to Winter, Thanksgiving feasts, the smell of fireplaces, icy ponds, hot chocolate, pumpkin pies and rifle smoke.
Yep.
November around here means DEER HUNTING SEASON. yeah baby!
City Boy and I had been preparing for months for this upcoming deer season. We bought a tree stand and had been cleaning up some of the damage from the ice storm in the back woods so we would be able to see any of the deer back there to hunt them. Just before season opened we had a nice cold snap. The wild turkey were out and about, and with our property opened up in the back now, the turkey really enjoy scratching around out there and I enjoy watching them. We had picked up a pair of binoculars and it's sure nice to see the turkeys close up ...and from the warmth of the house. But back to what I was saying....I was watching the turkeys one morning, to my surprise out walks a nice, I mean nice 8 point buck. I'm thinkin' yeah, this is going to be a great hunting season this year.
Another day as I was wandering through the kitchen I heard the ducks quacking at the back of the house...kind like the quacking noise they made on that dreadful night...so I walk outside to see what was up. The ducks were quacking, but the chicken were wandering around like no big deal, clucking merrily, the dog was running around on the deck, so, I look in the direction the ducks are looking and I happen to gaze upon one of the largest bucks I have ever seen eating happily away at the base of some tiny oak trees. It had no care that I was outside talking to the critters or that anything else was going on. I thinkin' deer season is gonna be easy pickins this year. Heck, I can hunt from the back deck. Or maybe take the ducks hunting with me, they sure know how to spot 'em.
The afternoon before season opened, City Boy and I hopped on the 4-wheeler so he could show me exactly where he placed the tree stand. As we started to take off, out jumps a doe in front of us.
Now, I'm just jumpy with anticipation.
But, that night.... it didn't get cold, a warm front came in. Deer don't move around much when it's warm and for those 2 weeks of season, it got down right hot. I never saw another deer all during season.
City Boy did eventually bag a deer, a doe, a female deer...ray, a drop of golden sunnnn....ooops sorry I broke out in song there, and our new neighbor Mr L bagged 2 the same day and gave us one. So I put on my butcher hat...not the cool white paper one Harold wears but my pretend one as I change jobs...and I proceeded to assist Mr L with disemboweling and hauling the two deer out of his back woods, then carrying his donation back to our place to be skinned and butchered. In the mean time City Boy had come back home to drop off his kill to be skinned and butchered. Remember me mentioning how hot it was? Well during a normal season with cooler temps the proper procedure is to skin and hang the deer for 3-4 days before butchering it. With these hot temps you can't, the meat will spoil. So from bullet to steaks wrapped and in the freezer, I, single handily, processed 2, count them 2 deer in one day. * slapping myself on the back* Now if I can just muster up the energy to grind some of it into burger.....
Oh and P.S. the day after the last day of season... it turned cold again!*sigh*

In the mean time........... Barbie Girl got sick again. This time with Strep. and she got it BAD. She was sick all through Thanksgiving running 104 temps. It was getting kinda scary. Thankfully, and thank God, She's back in school now and seems to be feeling fine. I on the other hand am down in my back again, but life around here won't let me slow down. I've taken on watching "The L's" 2 boys, 7 and 9 years old, after school for some extra cash and my crochet hook is flying to try and finish up some Christmas gifts and the oven is always hot from baking goodies.

So until next time...that's life here.... in an acorn.

promised photos

2007-11-30T08:24:00.000-06:00

So I promised you some before and after photos. These are not the greatest, but I will get some more later....BEFORE

After.
Notice the lack of cedar trees? Woo Hooo! I feel less clostrophobic already.
This is just for your enjoyment...or it would be if it were a better photo. This is the sky/treeline I can see from my back deck....it was all lit up in red and gold as the sun was coming up.
And these are pics of a storm that was just to the south of us and caused a tornado in a town less than 7 miles away. In the second pic you can see the start of the tornado between the trees.

And moving on to my creative-ness:
This is a floor rug made entirely of plastic Wal-Mart bags..the yellow strip is a Dollar General bag and the brown is a Bass Pro Shop bag.

Here is a Dragon I crocheted for my nephew for Christmas.

A Pig for Barbie Girl and a Horse for another nephew

A shrug for Barbie Girl and the lacy pattern of a scarf I sent to my sis. Barbie Girl ended up with one just like it.

Life in a nutshell....or acorn?

2007-11-30T07:21:00.000-06:00

OMG!

I can't hardly believe it's been 2 months since I blogged last...and leaving you all hanging with the promise of more photos.
Bad me! *spanking myself* Bad...bad...bad me.

So what been happening out here in the boondocks? Let me dig deep into my memory bank and see what I can recall.....
(everything goes all swirly and I see a younger better looking self and things come into focus)

WAIT!!! This is supposed to be a flashback, not a dream sequence! Wake up girl!

OK. so why don't I just skip the drama and jump right into the happenings.

October came and went with good and bad days just like any other month, but it left us with a bad taste in our mouths.

On the good side we got 2 sets of new neighbors....on the bad side we got more neighbors.

City boy and I, being the wonderful people that we are had a neighborhood get together at out home so everyone could meet. Well, OK. we did it because we're just plain nosey and wanted to check everyone out.

The neighbors closest to us, "The L's" invited us to a Halloween party at their place. So City Boy, Barbie Girl and I dressed up and introduced our new neighbors to the wonderful world of Beerguritas ( thanks UpChuck). We drank and par-tay-d and we were worshiped for this newfound liquid gold. so we are now excepted into the many social circles of our small and very cliquish community.

BUT, the aftermath of the party and the consequential hangovers were not what left us with a bad taste in our mouths....well, it did, but not the one I'm referring to.

Tragedy struck the chicken house. Actually the duck house, but the ducks weren't in it. Don't you just wish I'd just say what I mean?

I had managed to hatch out 10 chicks in the incubator. They were now old enough to go outside, but not big enough to be in the big chicken coop, so I kicked the ducks out of their house and put the little babies in it. understand now? good.

But then.................

We were visited by a midnight snacker. And we lost all the chicks.

The remaining evidence wasn't 100 percent clear on what did the snacking, but I had a couple of ideas. In the mean time, City Boy and I patched up the duck house. Snacker-proof. or so we thought.

With the chickies gone there was no need for the ducks to remain in the "bighouse" so I put them back in the duck house. They were a bit hesitant to return there, I think they could still smell the carnage. But in they went and they were locked up for the night.

I save you all the details...but The midnight Snacker came back for another meal. This time he found the ducks. Persistent quacking at 3 AM allowed me to interrupt The Snacker's attempt at a meal.

I found The Snacker trying to get away with this one. The Snacker turned out to be a huge-ass 40 someodd pound raccoon. Man, do they grow 'em big here! At 3 Am it's hard to assess the damage very well, but all ducks were accounted for and I shoo'd them into the "big house", locked them up tight and went back inside to put on some better pants and some boots and set up my stake-out. I didn't have to wait too long before The Snacker returned for his missed meal. At this point I'd LOVE to be able to say that The Snacker had had his last meal and that I cured him of his lead deficiency, but alas holding a spotlight while trying to shoot is an acquired skill I don't posess yet. The Snacker got away, but at least he was empty handed. The Snacker did eventually meet his demise, but from the loaded end of my new neighbor. Thanks Mr L. I knew I liked you for some reason.

As daylight came, I went out to inspect the damage done. All but 3 ducks were badly hurt. I brought each one into the house examined their wounds, applied "Blu-Kote" and put each one back with a prayer. It was pretty worrysome for the two males for a couple of days. But for God's grace they all have survived and are now doing well..... and still living in the "bighouse".

Barbie Girl was sent home sick from school the day before Halloween. She missed school and all the parties they were having and ended up having to stay home Halloween night. We went ahead and let her dress up and then City Boy hid behind every door in the house with the candy bowl and let Barbie Girl knock on each one and say trick or treat. City Boy played up his part and Barbie Girl had a good time despite having to stay home.

I'm going to take a break right here, cause I have to pee and I need more coffee. But I'll be back with more photos ( I Promise) and what happened in November.

stay tuned.

But that's life out here

2007-09-21T10:29:00.000-06:00

Fall is not quite "officially" here yet, but I can smell it in the air and that makes me happy. I'm so ready for summer to be over.

It's been a while since I "blogged in" so I thought I'd hop in here to let you in on the "goings on" around here.

Barbie Girl is doing well in school and I'm feeling that this might be the year for her. I think (knock on wood) that she eneded up with a good and caring teacher this year. As of this moment, so far, so good. But I must confess her new school year sure started out a bad one.

The night before school started Barbie Girl decided to let me know she was having some issues in the bathroom but not to worry because she wasn't going to miss the first day of school. Despite red flags going up in my mind I let her go. Bad Momma....bad, bad bad...momma. But I did call the doctor that morning and they wanted to see her right away. So off I go to pick up Barbie Girl...from school....the very first day.... She was only there a total of ten minutes. *sigh* Doctor's visit came back with results of a whopping kidney infection *double sigh*

Luckily she recovered fast with no side effects.

One week later................
she was running fever with headache, congestion and cough. 3 more days of school missed....the day she finally returned to school.....Barbie Girl got on the bus giving her mommy a hug and a kiss and a special surprise.....her cold.
And boy, did I get it BAD.
Thankfully? I got it over the Labor day weekend so I was allowed 3 full days to be sick and then the family annouced I was no longer allowed to be sick and to get back to my duties and the laundry. They desperately wanted real food, clean clothes and a floor they didn't stick to. The sink was full of dirty dishes and the refridgerator was empty. My alotted sicks days had been used up and I had to get back to work. That's life out here.

I struggled through the week, managed to go grocery shopping and planned City Boy's birthday dinner...he turned 36....I finally got over the cold a week later.
For City Boy's birthday present he decided to have some work done on the place. This involved heavy equipment and a huge mess. That's life out here.
I promise to put up some before and after photos as soon as I can get them out of my camera. We both agree we like the end results.
I went on a crochet frenzy...I have photos of that, too. .. and inbetween cough and crochet stitches I did manage to hatch out 9 chicks in the incubator from the abandoned eggs of the chicken mamas. The last one hatched right before the noon-time bandit struck again.
I lost 2 chickie-mammas, 1 chicken and 2 babies.

THIS. MEANS. WAR!
I was very happy to know that we have a coyote season around here. *insert evil laugh here*
That's life out here.

So in a nut shell....the garden is done, the ducks are duckie, the chicken are...well, you know, less in numbers but still pecking, the temperature is cooling and we are all doing better.
Lots of work still left to do and winter to prepare for, but that's life out here.
City Boy took me out to lunch today, in town...It's been over a year since we've been out just the two of us. Our lunch date was cut short when the butcher called to say our pig was ready.
Yeah.
Our pig.
We ordered a whole pig to be butchered at out local meat market. It's so cool. We have a meat market, with a butcher just like Sam the butcher from the Brady Bunch. He's a real character too. Even wears the white paper hat. Ya don't see that in Southern CA.
So City Boy and I walked across the street from the grill house to the butcher shop, I did say we live in a small town, and said Hi to Harold the butcher. I was hoping his name would be Sam, but it's Harold and that's Ok too. We said Hi, picked up our pig and Harold stopped us to let us know he had half a side of beef he needed to sell too. Soooooo, I now have 600lbs of meat in my freezers. I think I'm good for a while...as long as the power doesn't go out..........but that's life out here and I still like it........well, except for the noon-time bandit....but his day is coming *evil laugh*

Creative

2007-08-22T10:55:00.000-06:00

Just so you don't think that I spent my whole summer cleaning garden dirt out from under my fingernails......

Here are just a few new things that were created here at the farm....................... This was our 2nd batch of chickies. Both of these hens took on the job of mothering 4 chicks. Unfortunately both mamas and 2 of the chicks were victims of the noon-time bandit.... a.k.a. coyote.

This was my surprise yesterday!This was my surprise last week. I know you've seen pictures of eggs before. But these are special eggs. They're DUCK eggs!From left to right: Average Lemon, young duck egg, large chicken egg, Americana chicken egg, egg fart.

yes, you read that right. and yes, I know a lemon is not an egg, It's just there for perspective for sizes. A young duck egg is the size of a medium chicken egg. An adult duck egg is the size of the lemon. And on the end is the egg fart. It is really a "missed" egg. It is an egg without a yoke. funny to say....funny to look at....and absolutely useless.

But just so you don't think my critters are the only thing around here being creative.....I made chicken salad.

Actually this is the left overs from my garden after all the cole crops finally bolted. There's lettuce, cabbage and broccoli down there.
Here's my home grown black-eyed peas. It's about the only thing left producing in the garden now, beside cherry tomatoes.

You know, I never really, I mean really, got the concept of hothouse tomatoes. I mean tomatoes grow like crazy and practically anyone can grow them. It's one of the easiest things to grow, really. But this year I finally understood why we have hothouse tomatoes.

Lettuce matures in May/June.

Tomatoes July/August.

I mean, COME ON. How's anyone supposed to have a salad if these things mature in different MONTHS? Someone far wiser than me thought of hothouse tomatoes and I bow down with my dirty fingernail and sunburned head to this genius. Now I need a hothouse.

Huh? What's that?

You say that's still not really my creation?.........

How about THIS....

Before and After.

Just look at the nice sturdy fencing AND a gate surrounding the chicken coop. Not to mention the little duck house attached to the side.

Still not creative enough????

How about this?
Homegrown...Homemade...Home canned Dill pickles. Yummmmmm.

What's that?

You say it still wasn't creative enough?

Wow. Tough crowd.

Ok. Try this one.

A hand crocheted Barbie colored sweater for the Barbie Girl.

Am I getting any closer? Am I creative enough yet?!?

Well, here's what Barbie Girl created.

How creative is that? Huh? Huh?

Figures. I just knew she'd win.

Ups and Downs

2007-08-21T12:24:00.000-06:00

The days are finally getting shorter..... and cooler....the chores are getting fewer... and I'm finally starting to find time for myself.

What are these all signs of?

The beginning of SCHOOL!

yes. It's official. As of Aug 16th, Barbie Girl is in 2nd grade. I can finally relax.

I can finally get something DONE again.

I can take some more pictures again.

I can...

I can BLOG again!

Now, don't get me wrong. Our summer was good. It was full of ups and downs....lots of ups...and lots of downs.

We started our summer with our very first batch of home hatched chickies. We ended up with 15 new babies. UP.

We lost 8 hatching eggs to the rain waters. We flooded pretty bad. DOWN.

Big Dog came to spend a month with us and showed up just in time to see a new batch of eggs hatch. UP.

We drove to Arkansas to pick him up from the airport. DOWN.

We stayed at Grand Country Square in Branson, Mo on the way back home. UP

We spent the next day playing every miniture golf course we could find in Branson. Our own mini PGA gold tournament. UP.

I won the tournament. UP.

We came home to a drowned chickie. DOWN

The Mama and another chickie turned up missing a few days later. DOWN

The other batch of hatching eggs started hatching. 3 new chicks. UP

We took the remaining hatching eggs ( after the mama quit setting them) and put them in our incubator and hoped for the best. We were able to watch 2 chickies hatch out of their shell. It was way KEWL! UP

My garden took off like wildfire. There was veggies coming up everywhere. The kids were able to experience where veggies come from and how to havest them. We had a blast digging up potatos. Everything tasted SO GOOD UP

We had a great time visiting with Big Dog. UP

We did some dight seeing in a near by big City. A big storm came in as we were leaving. We end up side by side with a tornado on our way home. VERY FREAKY. A bolt of lightning struck so close to our truck that we felt the heat from it inside the truck. SCARY!

This was very awesome and freaky so I give it a UP and DOWN.

Big Dog had to go backto So CA. DOWN

We drove to Arkansas again. DOWN

As you can see...Ups and Downs. This was, by no means, all of our summer.

Big Dog moved to Tennessee after he returned to So CA. He started High School Aug 13th.

Barbie Girl tried my last nerves and lost her swimming privileges.

Our male duck Cheeps finally figured out that the white things running around yelling QUACK were girls and suited him better for mating than the chickens.

Cheeps also figured out we have a pond and what to do with it.

A coyote showed up and hung around snatching chickens every afternoon for a week. I lost my favorite hen Lucy. The new Mama and 2 babies another 1st batch chicky and 2 more hens. I hope it choaked on a chicken bone.

R.I.P. Lucy

So, the garden is done. The kids are out of the house. Mama can finally get some rest. and get out and take some more pictures!

See you soon.

My Newest Profession

2007-04-03T12:30:00.000-06:00

Living out here, 30 minutes from the nearest town, often leaves a girl to rethink her grocery shopping strategy.
There is no longer such thing as a "quick" trip to the store. I can no longer just load up into the truck for a day of silliness and window shopping.
I now have to plan this glorious event days in advance. School and weather must be taken into consideration, current pantry stock and gas prices must factor in also.
I can't afford the prices of the nearest grocery store, so the store I frequent is actually a 70 mile round trip, and consumes a minimum of 5 hours to "get 'er done".
Perishables and my beloved ice cream are no longer bought without care. During the summer, some never make it home alive and so I have turned to the desperate attempts of trying to make our own sweet cold treats at home.
Our meat supply has been greatly helped by the local wildlife and my job title #245 - butcher.
Making a lot of things from scratch has helped stretch our food supply and our number of weeks between grocery trips.
Another thing that has got me pondering our edibles is the seemingly endless news about recalls on food....people food AND pet food.

So City Boy and I stuck our city minded heads together and came up with a country solution. We ( meaning I) are gonna grow our own food.

yep.

A garden.

Job Title #246 Gardener

Now let me tell you, as sure as a California desert grows tumbleweeds and rattlesnakes, the Ozarks grows trees and rocks.... neither of which are beneficial to having a garden. Our solution has been to build raised garden beds. the hardest part about this was actually finding enough dirt to fill them with. Top soil is like gold around here....except a gold vein is easier to find. But after a forestry excursion into our "back 5" we found some usable loam.

There are 4 of these boxes and they measure about 4x8.

The next obstacle to having our own food was to keep it away from the critters....owned or otherwise.

Wildlife abounds here and the last thing we want is to become a grocery store for them. So a fence was decided upon.

City boy used cedar trees for the posts. Most of these were tress that had fallen or had damage from the January Ice Storm. At the time my my blogging this the fence area has been completed, but my lazy butt just hasn't gone out and taken pictures of the completed project. OK. the truth is I ran out of batteries for the camera and see reasons above for why I haven't made a quick trip to the store for some more. lol

I have managed to get a few things planted. Some even before the fencing was finished.

If you look closely in the above pictures, one of the boxes has an old screen door on top of it. I had just planted peas and didn't want the chickens to get in there and eat them. the good news is, it worked. The peas have sprouted and the screen door is no longer adorning my garden bed.

I also planted potatoes right away.

And I've started lots of seedlings indoors to be transplanted to the garden beds at the appropriate time. So far my tomato plants are doing best.

Now, there might be some skeptics out there that just don't believe that a city girl like me would get her hands dirty with a garden that doesn't involve highly pruned rosebushes.....

But I'm telling ya...the proof is in the pictures!

Things have been sprouting like crazy around here. We've been blessed with some 80 degree temps the last few days. I have honestly been able to "watch" the grass grow. With our latest rains and the warm temps, I swear that the grass is 3 inches longer and hour after I mow it. BUT obviously the weatherman didn't realize I had already started my garden because he forecast below freezing temps this week and SNOW on Thursday!

Oh well, live and learn. If I lose everything during this....I'll just call it PRACTICE.

There are some things that I'll never be able to grow....hmmm coffee comes to mind.....and toilet paper.............and there are a few things that I miss finding readily available as I did in CA. such as citrus and avocados. So for now it look like the grocery store and I will still have a love/hate relationship....that is until I get a greenhouse where I can grow citrus and coffee and I can convince City Boy that the native "flannel plant" around here is a great alternative to toilet paper.

I've Been Busy

2007-03-23T07:33:00.000-06:00

I've been busy.
I don't mean just lately, but for a long while now.
I know.....I know. Some of you are thinking. Good gosh. How can that be? You don't work, you stay at home all day and play on the computer.
IF ONLY that were true. well, ok sometimes that's true. But most of the time it isn't.
Moving out here to the Ozarks has added a few more job titles to my list of mom, wife, chicken wrangler and internet surfer.
I have been busy. Really. AND I have proof.
(bet ya never saw THAT coming)

One of my new professions is.....Butcher.
Trust me. It's not a glamorous as it sounds. But I'll take you through the process..well mostly. I'll leave the really gorey stuff out.

BEFORE:
This is what our first deer hunting season brought us. This nice buck was taken in our own backyard by City Boy.....and in our yard is where my butchering journey begins......this is also where we fastforward through the gorey part....and you'll just have to take my word for it that, YES, I did do it. YES, it was gross, but I lived through it and the end product is worth doing it again.

Next, let me introduce to you my antique, swap meet find, muscle aching, hand cramping, love/hate, all purpose meat grinder.

AFTER:

Mmmmmmm.....doesn't that look lovely?

In that bowl is about 10 pounds of ground deer meat after it's first go around with the meat grinder. Because deer meat is so lean, and what fat there is on the deer doesn't taste all that great, I'll later add some beef fat and run it through the grinder again.
Now let me tell you. That there is a real work out. So much so, that I've had to break up my joyous meat grinding sessions into different days with almost a week apart to give my arm time to recover. After my first session, I whined and cried like a baby. God, I'm a wuss.

So far I've ground up about 40 lbs of deer burger and I've still got steaks and roasts left....but I'm running low on arm strength at the moment.
City Boy tried to help out one day. He did the grinding while I removed fat and grissel and cut the meat into strips. He later annouced that we should invest in an electric meat grinder.
That's City Boy slang for "damn, this is making my arm tired."
I guess putting up with him in the kitchen was worth that announcement....but I haven't seen a new grinder yet. ( I wonder....if I let him help with the housework if he'll announce I need a maid? Yeah. like THAT would ever happen!)

Someone might ask.......What do I do with all that deer meat?
Well, there's the typical ham...er, deer burgers.
Venison chili
Venison stew
actually I use it in place of ground beef wherever I can.
Here's my lastest creation with it......

That's breakfast sausage links y'all. YUM! I just pulled them outta the freezer to snap this picture. I forgot to take one yesterday when I finished. I made sausage patties also, but they don't photograph well.

Who'd have ever thought that this Southern California chick would ever become a wild game butcher?

I have butchered some of my chickens in the past, and plan to do a few more here soon. But honestly, it's just not as exciting as wild game.

Wild Turkey Season opens soon. I hope I get to be busy again.

The Absence of Mind

2007-03-14T06:47:00.000-06:00

Good Lord! it's been a month and I haven't blogged anything!

OH the Horrors!..............The agony!...................the cramping of brain cells!

Actually my excuses are more like....

Oh the Stomach Pains!..... Grab the Puke bucket!

The lack of power......the twisting of funnel clouds!

The scratching of heads......Ewwww! the bugs I found!

but not necessarily in that order.

So as you make have deduced...

Life got in the way.

Spring has arrived here in the Ozarks. With it came our first couple sets of Severe storms that brought with them a few misplaced tornados. Thank the Lord, our closest scare was to be forced out of bed at 4 Am and into our designated storm holdout. Here we hung out for about half an hour listening to every sound that filtered it's way into our hideout and we each mentually calculated how long we could keep holding our morning urine before we busted. But, the storm passed us with no ill effects and each made it to the bathroom in time with no damage to our kidneys or each other. Many others were not so lucky. Including a 7 yr old girl from Missouri and a dozen people, including many children, from Alabama. My heart felt sympathy goes out to those families.

We were also recently blessed with a visit from the "flu bug". Barbie Girl brought it home from school and proceeded to spend the next 2 weeks on the futon in the office. Her second day back to school, I came down with it. Let just say...it was N-A-S-T-Y. I do recall one morning waking up feeling particularly crappy and asking City Boy to PLEASE shoot me. I guess it's a good thing he had no mercy for me and didn't comply. But I will keep that in mind should he come down with it later.

My very first day of feeling like a human again was to be enjoyed by spending the day with Barbie Girl and City Boy in the near by Big City doing some Spring lawn and garden shopping....but that came to a screaching halt when Barbie Girl asked me to brush her hair and I found and insectular party going on all over her scalp. Can I just say.....EEEEWWWWWW!

Now, just for clarity.....I have major issues with bugs. Knowing this, we still moved to the Ozarks....land of bugs and snakes. I know. Go figure. I've gotten alot better about the bugs around here as long as they stay outside.

So....the thought and proof that there were creepy crawlies in my house, just waiting to jump out and get me and mine, sent me into a hysterical meltdown. We won't factor in that I had just spent a whole week feeling like absolute dog crap and was too sick to even have coffee in the morning...and now I have to deal with BUGS in my HOUSE?!?!....and on Barbie Girls' HEAD?!?!?

Yeah. Ok. I yelled. I screamed. I almost cried. But I composed myself and proceeded to completely tear apart my house. Anything and everything in the house that could be washed was taken and piled into the laundry room. Barbie Girl's bedroom was stripped bare and completely sanitized. All the while she was forced to walk around with mayonaise coated hair and a Glad freezer bag placed over her head and saran wrapped in place. An Ozark shower cap.
I washed and mayonaised hair like a madwoman. City Boy left me to my rantings and went to the Big City without us.

Today, Barbie Girl headed (no pun intended) back to school, and I have my quiet time back. With the coming of warm tempertaures again, City Boy and I have been working diligently on my new garden area. It's almost finished and today I get to put in my first seeds! I'm also hoping to get out and about with the camera and if I'm extra good today, I may even get the little beasties loaded into the computer. Until then I'll leave you with some pictures of the January Ice Storm, so you can apperciate the coming of Spring as much as I do.

It Did It Again

2007-02-05T07:18:00.000-06:00

Last night.......It did it again.

I didn't want it to........My GOD! WHEN will it stop?!?

I can't take any more of it. I want it to just go away.

But I know it won't. At least not for a while. Those awful people said it might even do it again.

Why Lord? WHY?

I'm a wuss.

Growing up in where I did in California didn't offer many chances to live with snow. We were lucky if we saw evidence of the white stuff every 5 -6 years. The only times I can remember seeing it sticking and staying of the ground in any amount was back in 1974, and it happened again in 1999. We didn't get to really see it snow. It happened in the middle of the night, and most people woke up to it when they heard their trees cracking and the limbs falling on their house. No, there wasn't that much snow, just unaccustomed trees. Snow was such a rarity that they shut the whole town down that day.

This is not to say that we never saw or played in snow every year. There are plenty of places around us that recieved gobs of the white wonder. We'd bundle up. Fill the trucks full of "stuff" and snacks and blankets. Set off for our 1-3hour drive with our caravan of friends and family and spend the day sledding and playing snowball fights with the kids. We played hard, or at least the trees we ran into were hard...but when we all tired out , we climbed into our warm vehicles with our wet clothes and drove home to our houses that were not surrounded by snow.

Now, the snow follows me wherever I go. It's in my truck, in my house, in my shoes, in my freezer.......yeah, freezer. Homemade snowcones. Yummmmm.... Oh,... um.... back to my bitching....It's everywhere!

I can't drive in this stuff.

I'm a wuss.

So I take the 4-wheeler anywhere I need to go, as long as I don't leave OUR road. Oh, and a 4-wheeler is a QUAD to all you west coast folks.

They don't say QUAD aroun' these parts. It's F-O-U-R W-h-e-e-l-e-r or they start lookin' at you all funny like.... and say stuff like..."is you one of them there Call-i-for-ni city folk?" at which I just smile pretty like and reply " Nope! I'm from TEXAS!"

Construction Jargon #1

2007-02-04T08:24:00.000-06:00

Construction Term: Blue Room

What It Means: A sanitary name for the common color of the very unsanitary temporary structure. Great works of literature are often written in these rooms.
a.k.a Port-A-Potty

Meet She-She

2007-02-02T14:31:00.000-06:00

This is She-She.

She was found in a box, with two other puppies, left on a construction site in the city. The box said

For Sale: $3

She-she was so tiny she fit in City Boy's tool bags.

Here's She-She now. The "country" dog.

She-She's a Mutt. The other puppies that were in the box when she was found were undoubtedly rottweiler and chow-chow. But I swear she's part deer.... part cat..... part jack rabbit, too.... and ALL bark. She loves to play fetch , swim in the pond and playing with our closest neighbor's dog.
She-She rides in the truck with Barbie Girl and I down to the bus stop every morning. She goes absolutely balistic if she happens to see and kind of wild critter...she has the undeniable urge to chase them.

She-She helps me with my critters and is my personal companion.

She is the eater of all things.... cleaner of all things dropped....scapegoat(dog?) of all thing stinky-butt related....and the sole reason why I vacuum daily.

A keeper of critters

2007-02-02T13:41:00.000-06:00

I'm a keeper of critters. Right now, mainly chickens.

Yeah. Chickens.

I never gave a flip about chickens before. I hated them. I didn't even like KFC. Give me good 'ol beef anyday. Keep your chicken. But something weird, something wonderful and very strange came over me when City Boy and I were looking at buying our new home here in the Ozarks. A lightbulb flashed in my head and I blurted:

"I wanna keep livestock! No. No, wait! I wanna get chickens"

City Boy didn't have much to say about this. He knew in his heart that there was no way I would ever get chickens. I didn't like chicken. Ever.

I bought my chickens from some local Mennonites. I came home with five - 1 year old Buff orphington hens in a borrowed cage and some chicken feed. I called City Boy at work...

City Boy: "Hello."

"Hi honey." in a sugary-sweet voice "Are you going to be working late today?"

City Boy: "Not today. Why?" pause "What do you want?"

"Nothing really. I just need you to build a chicken coop when you get home. These girls can't stay in this cage for long cause I need to give it back to the Mennonite folks."

City Boy: "Huh? Girls? What cage?"

He knew in his heart I'd never get chickens. Ever.

More about Me...

2007-02-02T08:34:00.000-06:00

My name is V. This is my website. Welcome to my Ozark Follies.

I was born a poor California city-girl......no, really.... I was.

Married. A typical soccer mom (MILF). Had a little house in the middle of town. A career. Took my daughter to ballet classes, my son to football practice and even had play-dates....

Now, I'm living on a remote hilltop in the middle of the Ozarks....with no cell phone!

I'm a thirty-something SAHM, mother of two and wife, to the love of my life, City-boy.

I was the baby of my family - read "spoiled" - and was a model student....I wasn't a popular kid...but I didn't fit in with nerds either, so I wasn't noticed much...at least not until I got pregnant in high school. Then everyone knew who I was.

I didn't like living in the city....I dreamed of being a country girl, a cowgirl, and riding horses.
Now that I'm here, I don't have a single horse, I'm definately NOT a cowgirl and I have no clue what I'm doing.

Sooooo.....
I spend my days learnin' how to live out here in the country....doin' things I could never have done in the city...let alone, in California.

Let me introduce you to:

MY FAMILY

City Boy works away from home in the nearest big city. He is a work-a-holic and is VERY good at what he does. He works in a construction-type trade and brings home some knarly jokes. I promise to share them with you.

Here's a picture of City-Boy

I'm the mom of two.

The oldest being the cause of my sudden high school popularity. Big Dog, still lives in the city. Big dog is cool, he's goofy as all-get-out, but he's cool, way cooler than me. He's also on his way to making the family history with his size. Just in the last year he passed me in height by a foot. And I won't even get started on his FEET....size 13...enough said.

The youngest joined us on our adventure East.

Here's a picture of Barbie-girl.
Barbie girl is the wearer of all things pink and frilly. I don't think there's an ounce of tomboy in her body. She is my exact opposite except that she's got a smart mouth like me.

A disclaimer about Barbie girl.... as I post more and more pictures, there is bound to be a few that show Barbie girl with little or no hair. Barbie girl is a cancer survivor. There. It's out. Now leave it alone.

As for what I look like? Well.... I prefer not to take pictures of me. So I'll leave that to your imagination.
I will tell you I've got red hair.