Paralyzed with JOY!

"Wicked" x2

2025-11-22T12:12:00.001-06:00

Last year, Chandra and I went to see "Wicked" together, and we both LOVED it! Chandra insisted that I wear pink, since she was wearing green. I obliged.

When we were discussing going to see the next movie this year, I said, "I will wear green, and you can wear pink." Chandra obliged, and she even did her nails in pink and green. She totally commits. 😋

I made this Facebook/Instagram post when I shared our "Wicked" pictures:

"Wicked For Good" = SO good! 🥰 Chandra is so fun and the best movie buddy. We're just 🎶🎵 'two best friends'. 🎵🎶 I love her infectious personality. She has definitely influenced my life 'for good'! 🩷💚

She really is my bestie! 💕

Spiritually Whole

2025-11-17T12:14:00.001-06:00

I heard a talk earlier this year given by Camille Johnson, the woman who leads my church’s women’s organization. She spoke about the biblical parable of the ten lepers, recounting how all ten lepers were healed—but only one was made whole. She then posed a question that struck me deeply: If healing and wholeness are not the same, can one be made spiritually whole by Him [Jesus], yet not be physically or emotionally healed?

She reminded us that the Master Healer will mend all of our afflictions—physical and emotional—in His time, but she also asked, “In the waiting to be healed, can one be whole?” Over the past many months, I've thought about that question many times.

On this 22nd anniversary of my car accident, I can truly say that I have been made whole. Not the kind of whole that allows me to “take up my bed and walk” as is spoken of in the fifth chapter of John, but a wholeness that fills me with a peace and joy that make my physical challenges easier to bear.

If I had to sum up my accident and the effect it had on my life in one phrase, it would be this: what broke me physically healed me spiritually. The physical change that took place on November 17 was instantaneous. The spiritual transformation is ongoing. I am a work in progress and I am profoundly grateful for the wholeness I’ve found along the way. 💖

A PSA to keep you safe!

2025-11-01T11:00:00.001-05:00

Now that it’s November—the month that changed my life forever—I thought it was the perfect time to share this visual PSA I created [see images below]. I hope it will make people pause and think when they are behind the wheel.

I was just 19 when my car accident happened; the girl who ran a red light and T-boned me was only 17. I’ll never know why she failed to stop at the red light—maybe she was adjusting the radio, reaching for her phone, or simply lost in thought for a moment. Whatever it was, that split second altered the course of my life. I’ve never harbored anger or bitterness toward her. In truth, it could have been me who made that same mistake. My only hope is that what happened served as a powerful reminder to her to stay alert, stay present, and always keep her eyes and mind focused on the road.

A brief pause before entering an intersection (especially when you are the first car in line) to make sure all cars have come to a stop is such a simple thing to do, and it could save you a real hassle! Parents, please share this post with your teen drivers. If my story or this message can help even one person be safer while driving, then my aim for creating this PSA has been accomplished. 💖

Highlights of 2024

2024-12-25T11:20:00.002-06:00

Merry Christmas, family and friends! 2024 was a pretty good year, and I have no complaints. Here are a few highlights:

– In April and May some of my dear friends came to visit me while they were in St. Louis. Gotta love reminiscing with wonderful friends!

– I saw my second [and last] total solar eclipse in April. Spectacular!

– I turned 40 in June and enjoyed a few days with my sister Annette, who came from NY to help me celebrate.

– Reading the weekly emails from my nephew Ethan who is doing missionary work in Guyana (South America).

– Seeing Wicked at the movie theater with Chandra.

– I became a great aunt a few weeks ago when my oldest niece, Kim, welcomed a baby boy (Malachi).

– Remaining happy, healthy and hospital-free all year.

I hope 2025 brings happiness and JOY to all! 💖

Bucket List: Complete!

2024-04-09T20:16:00.002-05:00

When I experienced the total solar eclipse back in 2017, I was blown away with how amazing it was, and it exceeded my expectations, since I didn't really know what to expect. I felt so lucky and blessed to live right smack dab in the path of totality. With all of the excitement and eclipse news coverage in 2017, I learned there would be another total solar eclipse that would pass very close to where I live on April 8, 2024. That date stuck in my mind—it was easy to remember, because that's the day my good friend Lacee would turn 40—and I was determined to be in the path of totality so I could experience that celestial phenomenon for a second time. I told my mom that seeing the total solar eclipse on 4/8/24 was the ONLY thing on my bucket list, and that I could die a happy woman after seeing it. (Sure, there are tons of things I would like to do, but with my limitations, most of them are not feasible. Plus, I am a happy, content person, and I don't have a lot of wild, "bucket list"-type dreams.)

Yesterday was the day! Days prior I began praying, asking Heavenly Father to please help the weather conditions be favorable for optimal eclipse viewing, and He answered! There were minimal clouds, and none that obstructed our view of the eclipse. Back in 2017, totality lasted for a maximum of 2 minutes and 25 seconds, but this time totality lasted for a maximum of 4 minutes and 10 seconds. I didn't want to drive all the way south to Jackson or Cape Girardeau, Missouri, so we settled on Ste. Genevieve. We have a friend that lives there, and she was gracious enough to allow my mom, my sister Chandra and her kids and me to come watch the eclipse with them.

I seeeriously underestimated the amount of traffic there would be! My mom and I wanted to follow Chandra down to our friends house (since we've never been there before), so we planned to leave for Chandra's house about 11:30 AM. (The first contact of the eclipse began at 12:45 PM, and totality was at 2 PM.) One of my friends let me know before 8:30 AM that traffic on the highway was crawling, so my mom and I left for Chandra's house at 10:15 AM (instead of 11:30). It usually takes us 15 minutes to get down to Chan's place, but it took us an hour! After she loaded her kids in her van, it took us another 45 minutes to drive less than half a mile just to get back on the highway. 😕 I was starting to wonder if we would even make it to Ste. Genevieve on time. Thankfully, the traffic really picked up once we got out of Jefferson County. The traffic was still heavy, but we were at least moving along at a speed of about 50 miles an hour, instead of sitting in gridlock.

Totality was AMAZING! There are really no words to describe the phenomenon. But spectacular, breathtaking, awe-inspiring, and out of this world are just some of the words I can think of to describe the eclipse. It's something you see and feel. The sky definitely got darker this time, as opposed to 2017, and I could feel the temperature drop. I was almost chilly in my long-sleeved shirt when the sun was completely eclipsed by the moon. The 2 minutes and 44 seconds of totality flew by! Something that surprised me during both eclipses is just how bright the sky gets as soon as there is the tiniest sliver of unobstructed sun after the moon moves enough to let sunshine out again.

I was so grateful everything worked out so I could go. I was so happy to be able to experience the eclipse with Chandra's kids. I know Rosie won't remember it, as she is not even 18 months yet, but hopefully Christian (8) and Ruby (6) will remember it. I made sure to take a picture with them to help them remember this special, supernatural event long after the details start to get fuzzy in their minds.

I just reclined my wheelchair and enjoyed the show!

My friend snapped these pictures for me on her cell phone:

One of the best parts of the eclipse was that it was a fun event to unify and bring people together. That was special, especially since [some] people in the world seem to have gotten so mean, nasty and divisive in the past 15-20 years. I just want people to be happy and to get along, even if they disagree on different political and social issues.

Another happy thing related to the eclipse was getting to reconnect with two friends that I dearly love. Nate came to town to see the eclipse, and he and our friend Laura came over to visit with my mom, Chandra and me. We had a great time reminiscing about all the fun times we've shared over the past 15+ years that we've been a part of each other's lives.

A huge shout out and THANK YOU to my amazing mom for making this dream of mine come true and for driving FIVE hours round-trip in traffic that was very slow. It took us about two hours to crawl home with all of the other eclipse watchers that were heading home.

The next time a total solar eclipse will be visible from the United States won't be until August 2044, and that one will just barely hit the US (only Montana, North Dakota and South Dakota will see it). I sure hope I am dead by then! Sure, I will only be 60, but my desire is to die young!

November 17, 2003: 20 Years Later

2023-11-17T05:00:00.001-06:00

Today is the 20th anniversary of the car accident that changed my life. (To read more about my accident, click here.) I have been anticipating this anniversary for years. I was just 19 years old at the time of my accident, so I have now been paralyzed longer than I was able-bodied. That's crazy to think about. Sometimes I still can't believe this is my life… I never would have imagined that my life would turn out this way.

The first few years after my accident were very difficult for both my mom and for me, as we both learned how to navigate our new life. We both experienced a lot of loss and went through a grieving process. It was hard having to let go of most of my dreams and the plans I had made for my life, while everyone else I knew was still moving forward with their normal lives. I would never want to go back and relive those first few post-accident years again! As difficult as it was, with the help of family, a few good friends, and my faith in God and His plan, I was able to make my way through the aftermath of the most difficult thing I'd ever experienced.

I've always maintained that breaking my neck was the worst thing to happen to me physically, but the best thing to happen to me spiritually. I guess you could say that what broke me physically healed me spiritually. I'm ashamed to admit this, but God was not the number one priority in my life prior to me becoming paralyzed. I was letting other things like school, work, and friends take priority in my life, and I wasn't making as much time for my relationship with God as I should have. There is nothing like almost dying to give you a good wake-up call to force you to examine your life and think about what is most important. While I would have never wanted to go through everything I have, I'm grateful for the opportunity to make spiritual progress that I wouldn't have made (or made as soon) without going through this trial. The things I've gained outweigh the things I've lost.

Here is a quote that expresses my feelings about why God allows difficult things to happen to us:

Our Heavenly Father, who gives us so much to delight in, also knows that we learn and grow and become stronger as we face and survive the trials through which we must pass.

- Thomas S. Monson

Even though my life is very physically challenging, and I've experienced a lot of disappointment, loss and frustration in the last 20 years, my quiet, simple life is still pretty great. I'm grateful to be alive and to have more time on earth to continue to grow and improve. I'm grateful to have more time with my amazing mom and my wonderful sisters. I'm so glad that my 27 nieces and nephews actually get to know me, instead of me just being a name and a photograph of their aunt that died in an accident long ago. I'm grateful for the wonderful friends I've made in the last 20 years that I wouldn't have met if my life had ended years ago. So even though this isn't the life I imagined, I'll take it!

Finally, a verse from one of the apostle Paul's letters to the Corinthians:

For our present troubles are small and won’t last very long. Yet they produce for us a glory that vastly outweighs them and will last forever!

- 2 Corinthians 4:17 (NLT)

2022: The Highs and the Lows

2023-01-02T20:01:00.003-06:00

I thought I would make an update, even though I "retired" from blogging several years ago. I get emails from random strangers every now and then from people that used to follow my blog, and they tell me how much they miss it. That always makes me feel a little guilty, but I just felt like I said everything that needed to be said, so I hung up my blogging hat! Anyway, here is an update with the highs and lows from the year:

2022 started off on a rough note because I got sick the last few days of 2021, and I actually had to have my mom take me to the Emergency Department in the middle of the night. The good thing about going to the hospital in the middle of the night was that we didn't have to wait in the waiting room (even though it was pretty busy for 3 AM), but the bad thing was that we got NO sleep that night! The long story short was that I had a double whammy: influenza and pneumonia. I was having trouble getting a deep enough breath, hence the reason why we went to the ED in the middle of the night. I absolutely hate being in the hospital for a multitude of reasons, so spending six days in the hospital wasn't the way I wanted to bring in the new year. I had to be on oxygen for several days to keep my O2 saturation above 90. I kept having setbacks that prevented me from being well enough to go home, and they thought I would have to go home on oxygen. On Friday night, January 7, I feel like I was miraculously healed, and when I woke up on Saturday, I finally felt well enough to go home.

I spent the rest of January and all of February recuperating and hiding out. I didn't go anywhere! COVID was raging, and I did not want to take any chances of getting sick again and landing back in the hospital.

In March I decided to seek out an ENT that specializes in trachs to try and get help for a problem that started around 2018. Around that time, I'd started noticing air leaking out of the stoma, or hole, in my neck that my trach goes in. The problem grew worse and worse over the past few years, and it really started impacting my life in a negative way. I could breathe okay and I wasn't short of breath; however, so much air was leaking out around my trach that it was making it even more difficult for me to speak than it already is, since the air was leaking out my stoma instead of going up through my vocal cords. (I haven't been able to speak "normally" since my accident, and it can be really difficult to hear me since I speak so softly.)

I found a wonderful ENT that I really like, and she seemed very knowledgeable. Again, the short story is that there hasn't been an easy fix for this problem. My doctor doesn't really know WHY I started having this problem after having a trach for so long with no issues. I had surgery in April, May, and July to try and fix the issue. During my first surgery in April, my doctor did a bronchoscopy after I was sedated, and she found a stenosis (narrowing) of my airway, so she didn't continue with the surgery. Instead, I had to go get a CT scan of my neck, so she could determine what was causing the stenosis. I went back and had surgery again in May to open up my airway. My doctor thought that would fix the problem, and I was so hopeful. However, the air leak problem returned a week after the surgery after the swelling went down. I went back for more surgery in July, and this time my doctor did a stomaplasty to make the opening in my neck a little smaller. As with the surgery in May, one week post-surgery the problem returned. My doctor has also done some treatments in her office where she removes my trach and uses a needle to inject "filler" into the tissue inside my stoma to plump it up so that the air can't escape. This has helped somewhat, but it isn't permanent, and it reabsorbs and loses its effectiveness. Is it too much to hope for a permanent fix?! Not being able to speak loud enough to be heard is a handicap in and of itself. This issue is still ongoing.

Several of my sisters and their families came to visit over the summer, and that's always something I greatly look forward to. My 19-year-old niece, Kate, stayed with my mom and me for two months over the summer during her break from college. She made some money, my mom and I had extra help and companionship, so it was a win-win all the way around. With Kate around, she and my sister Chandra were able to stay with me and take care of me so my mom could take a couple of trips. She went to go see my grandma in Minnesota in June, which was wonderful, since my mom hadn't been able to go see her since 2019 with all of the COVID restrictions at the retirement community where my grandma lives. My mom was also able to go to Texas in July to be there for my oldest niece's wedding.

In August, I had surgery again to remove some kidney stones. I've had problems with kidney stones ever since I became paralyzed, and I always dread having surgery to remove them because it's frequently complicated. But it's a necessary thing, so I went into it hoping for the best. I've gotten some bad infections after kidney stone-removal surgery in the past, so I asked my doctor if I could stay overnight and have 24-hours of IV antibiotics, just to cut down on the chance of me getting a post-op infection. The surgery went great, and I was moved to my room. Long story short, my blood pressure plummeted and they couldn't get it to stabilize, so I had to spend two days in the ICU. I did get a post-op infection, just as I feared. I was in the hospital a total of seven days, and I had to get a central line so I could finish my 14-day course of IV antibiotics at home. Have I mentioned how much I hate being in the hospital?! The beds are incredibly uncomfortable, I don't have all of the things that make me more comfortable and my life easier, the food is not good, and it's just SO boring! Fortunately, my mom always stays with me the entire time. Nurses do not have the time or know-how to take care of someone that needs as much care as I do.

While I was in the hospital, my grandma from Minnesota was feeling poorly. She went through a lot of tests, and she was ultimately diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. She died exactly three weeks later. She was 93 and she lived an amazing life, and my grandpa died in 2019, so it was her time to go. Still, we all miss her very much. My sister Sharon came up from MS in October so she could help our sister Chandra take care of me, while my mom and her husband David went to my grandma's memorial service. The three of us sisters had fun together, and I'm so glad Sharon could come so my mom could go celebrate my grandma's life with the rest of our family.

On November 7, I became an aunt for the 27th time when Chandra had her third baby: a little girl named Rosalie Rae Coleman. (Rae is my mom's middle name.) Rosie is beautiful, and we couldn't be more happy to have her in our family. On November 17, I commemorated the 19th anniversary of my car accident. I was 19 at the time, so that means I've now been paralyzed for half of my life. Crazy!

In December we enjoyed the holidays. We went over to Chandra's house after church on Christmas Day, and had a wonderful time. Sharon, her husband, and their six kids visited for five days after Christmas, and we had a blast.

2022 was a very busy year filled with way more appointments than my mom and I would've liked, but it wasn't all bad, and we feel very blessed. So long as God is on our side—and He is—we can conquer ALL things! 💖

Stone-Free & Fully Vaccinated

2021-04-10T11:52:00.000-05:00

I can't believe we are already well into the month of April; 2021 is flying by! This year has been going well for me, although, I have been hospitalized twice. In February, I started having pain in my left flank, and I was pretty sure it was due to kidney stones. This isn't my first bout with stones, so I knew the signs. The pain got so bad that I actually had my mom take me to the Emergency Department on Valentine's Day. After doing a CT scan, the doctor discovered that I passed a 6mm stone from my left kidney, through the ureter, and into the bladder. No wonder I'd been in pain! I was admitted to the hospital and I stayed for two days.

A couple of weeks later, I had a telehealth appointment with my urologist. She is a stone specialist at Barnes Jewish Hospital in St. Louis, and I know I am in capable hands under her care. She told me that I had a lot of other kidney stones in my left kidney, and she needed to do surgery to remove them. (I tend to produce a lot of tiny kidney stones, the size of granules of sugar, which only grow larger if they aren't removed.) My doctor was actually taking a vacation (her first in over five years), but she squeezed me in to her already busy schedule before she left.

My surgery was on March 12, and it was supposed to be outpatient (however, that didn't happen). The good news is that my surgery went very well, and my doctor was able to remove all of the kidney stones in one surgery (she thought she might have to do it in two surgeries). The bad news is that I always produce infectious stones, and I had a bad kidney infection that was resistant to all oral antibiotics. SO, I ended up being hospitalized for an entire week, and I had to get a PICC line in order to come home, since I was on IV antibiotics for 10 days. All's well that end well, though. Even though I never look forward to being in the hospital, and away from all of the comforts of home, there were a lot of blessings, and things could've been a lot worse. I'm very grateful to be stone-free again, but if my past track record is any indication, I'm sure this won't be my last experience with kidney stones.

***

I also received my two doses of the Moderna vaccine in March. I prayed and prayed about the vaccine last year, and I asked Heavenly Father to inspire the scientists working on the vaccine, and to help them know just what to do in order to create a safe and effective vaccine to protect people against the SARS-CoV-2 virus. I do believe my prayers were answered, and I truly believe that this vaccine coming about so quickly can only be described as "miraculous." I love how scientists around the world were working together with a common goal for the good of humanity.

I'm grateful that I was able to get the vaccine, and that I didn't have to travel a far distance or have to wait in long lines. And I'm grateful I didn't have a bad reaction, either. My mom and my sister, Chandra, both felt lousy the day after the second dose, but it only lasted about 24 hours, which is a small price to pay for the protection and peace of mind having the vaccine brings.

Gratitude: Day 6

2020-11-26T11:19:00.001-06:00

Happy Thanksgiving! I've saved the best for last on my week of gratitude posts (I skipped the first day, which is why there have only been six). There aren't sufficient words to express my profound gratitude for my Savior, Jesus Christ. Just like the sun warms and gives light and life to our planet, Jesus gives light, warmth and meaning to my life. There is no pain, sickness, disability, disease, loss, addiction or any other bad "thing" that you or I could or will ever experience that Jesus has not experienced first. He was resurrected after His crucifixion, and I know one day I will be resurrected, too! I don't know if other Christians believe this, but I know some day in the next life our spirits/souls will be reunited with our bodies, and there will be no more disabilities, diseases or imperfections. This fills me with so much hope and joy!

"He is the light, the life, and the hope of the world. His way is the path that leads to happiness in this life, and eternal life in the world to come." (– The Living Christ)

Gratitude: Day 5

2020-11-25T12:16:00.002-06:00

I am grateful to be alive! Last week marked the 17th anniversary of my car accident, and while I would never have chosen this life, I'm grateful for my accident and for the trials that resulted from it. It was a catalyst for personal growth, and I'm a much better person now than I was 17 years ago. I've said this before, but I'll say it again... I would never go back and change things if the trade-off was giving up the personal growth and everything I've learned on this journey. I'm grateful for my God-given gift of joy that has enabled me to carry on with a grateful heart and an eternal perspective. God is good, and He knows what I need!

Gratitude: Day 4

2020-11-24T11:36:00.022-06:00

I'm grateful for family! I love my sisters (all six of them) so much! I wish they lived closer, but I'm grateful for our family chat, email, and video calls that keep us connected. I'm especially grateful for my sister, Chandra, who lives here locally. I ADORE her, and no matter how much time we spend together, it's never enough. I never tire of her! Here are all of my sisters, except Kristin:

Of course, I have to mention my gratitude for my angel mother. She has devoted her life to caring for me, and she does such a fantastic job! I'm glad we get along so well, since we have to spend so much time together!

Finally, I'm grateful for my nieces and nephews. I always wanted to be a mother, but since that didn't work out for me, being an aunt is the next best thing. I love my nieces and nephews—all 26 of them! My sisters are doing such a good job raising them, and they are growing up to be such good, smart, funny, talented and caring people. Family is truly a blessing!

Gratitude: Day 3

2020-11-23T12:58:00.003-06:00

I'm grateful for assistive technology and for the brilliant minds that create it. With so much that I physically can't do, it's nice that using a computer is something I can do, thanks to assistive technology. Even though I can't use my hands to type on a keyboard or move a mouse, I can use my voice to dictate emails, give commands, and use something called a head mouse to navigate around on the computer. I spend the majority of my free time on my laptop each day, and there's very little I can't do on a computer that an able-bodied person can. It gives me back some of the independence I've lost, which feels great!

The Healing Power of Gratitude

2020-11-22T13:46:00.000-06:00

This past Friday, Russell M. Nelson (prophet and president of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints) shared a special message with the world. In his message, he said, “Counting our blessings is far better than recounting our problems. No matter our situation, showing gratitude for our privileges is a unique, fast-acting, and long-lasting spiritual prescription.” He also encouraged everyone to flood social media with expressions of gratitude, complete with the the hashtag #givethanks for the next seven days. I'm not sure why, but I always feel shy and embarrassed when it comes to sharing feelings publicly on Facebook. I know I shouldn't care what other people think, but I do! That being said, I decided to just get over it, and to join in on flooding social media with a wave of gratitude. SO, I thought I would share my week-long journey of gratitude on my blog. Here are my posts from yesterday and today:

I am grateful for modern-day miracles. I have been praying nearly every night for the past many months that God would work a miracle and inspire the scientists who are working to develop a vaccine for COVID-19. Instead of taking years to create a vaccine (that is said to be 95% effective, I might add), it has been developed in a matter of months. I truly believe that this is a miracle and an answered prayer. I know some people are leery of vaccines, especially one that has been developed so quickly (which is a valid concern), but for me, I rather take my chances with a new vaccine rather than the disease.

Today I'm reflecting on how grateful I am for the wonderful friends I've made over the years. So many of them have made me want to be a better person. When we get to the other side, I think we will be surprised to learn that it was no coincidence that certain people were placed in our lives. My friends have really enriched my life and have made it much more enjoyable. I'm especially grateful for my special friends who are my helpers. I could just cry thinking about how much I love them for being willing to serve me. They are truly being God's hands, and I'm sure they have invisible halos above their heads, because they are angels!

Goodbye, Alex!

2020-11-08T19:59:00.007-06:00

I was saddened to hear the news this afternoon that Alex Trebek died today at the age of 80. He was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer last year, and I knew he would most likely die, since pancreatic cancer is so deadly (that's what my dad died of). Part of what kept Alex going during his illness was his work on Jeopardy!, which he had been hosting since 1984. Alex was still in the studio filming new episodes of Jeopardy! as recently as 10 days ago. He was a one-of-a-kind icon and will be greatly missed!

I loved watching the Jeopardy! The Greatest of All Time tournament earlier this year. It was great fun to tune in each night, and I was so happy that my old pal Ken Jennings won the tournament. Ken gets my vote to fill Alex's large shoes as the host of Jeopardy!. I doubt this will happen, but if I had my way, it would!

Quarantine Update

2020-05-06T12:02:00.000-05:00

I thought I would make a short post with a little update on how I am doing, since I've had a few people contact me to check up on me. I am doing well. I certainly never expected to be living through a pandemic, especially in the modern age that we live in! Even when Covid-19 started wreaking havoc in Wuhan, and then spread other places, like Italy, I never expected things to get like that here in America. I guess I was naïve!

Even though we've had a stay-at-home order where I live for the past six or so weeks, my day-to-day life really hasn't changed too much. Home is my favorite place to be, and I much rather stay home than go out. I haven't minded the restrictions and I haven't felt stir crazy in the least. I view this as a blessing, because I know there are some that have really struggled with the quarantine. My social needs are still getting met, since I have a few close friends that come over in the mornings to help my mom get me dressed and up, since that is a two-person job. This gives my mom and me a chance to visit with some of our favorite people. And thanks to technology, I can also video chat with my sisters and a few close friends.

I have been worried about getting coronavirus. I know most people get it and are able to get through the sickness at home and don't have a severe enough case to warrant hospitalization, but would that be true for me? I am in extremely good health for a quadriplegic that is paralyzed from the neck down and unable to breathe on my own, so I hope I would be okay if I got it, but you never know. Some healthy people get the virus and are critically ill, and even die, so I don't want to take any chances! I can't have my mom getting sick, either, since I rely on her for my care. We are being careful and cautious, and I pray every night for a continued blessing of protection to be on me, my family, friends and loved ones. We do all we can, and rely on God for the rest!

I hope everyone stays well. Prayers for those that are struggling physically, mentally/emotionally, and financially. We can get through this!

Welcome to 2020!

2020-01-15T13:35:00.000-06:00

Happy New Year! My holidays were great, and I hope everyone else's were, as well.

Christmas 2019 was a little different this year, since we didn't have any out-of-town company with us on Christmas Eve or Christmas Day. My sister Sharon and her family have spent Christmas with us here in Missouri for the past decade, but this year they opted to have Christmas at home in Mississippi. Most of Sharon's kids have never spent Christmas in their own home (or they are too young to remember it), so this Christmas was a new experience for us and for them! I still had a wonderful Christmas, even though it was different. It was kind of nice to not have to get up super early in order to get dressed, up, and ready by 8 AM. (I know 8 is rather late for most kids to start opening Christmas presents, but it takes me a while to get up and ready, so that's why we always held the kids off until 8.)

My sister Chandra lives close by, so she and her family got up and opened presents at their house, had breakfast, and then came over to my house about 11 AM. Christian and Ruby opened a few presents from my mom and her husband, David, and from me, too, of course. After that, we talked and visited for awhile, and then our good friend Paul joined us for a late lunch/early dinner. It was a great day. The only bad thing about this Christmas, is that I don't have a single picture to show for Christmas Day! But here are a few pictures of Chandra's family on the Sunday before Christmas:

Sharon and her family came the day after Christmas and they spent a week with us. We had such a nice, relaxed visit. I just love talking and hanging out with my nieces and nephew! I seriously have some of the best nieces and nephews around. Christian enjoyed having cousins to play with, and everybody loved sweet Ruby. Unfortunately, I started feeling poorly the day Sharon's family arrived. I don't know what was wrong, but I had a fever off and on for a couple of days, a bad headache and body aches, and I just didn't feel well. I went to bed earlier than usual for an entire week, and after several days of rest I felt back to normal. Whew... nobody has time to be sick, especially when family is around!

One special thing that happened while Sharon's family was here was that her oldest daughter, Elizabeth, chose to go through the temple (where we make special covenants with God). I was so glad she chose to do this at the St. Louis Temple, so that my mom, David and I could be there. That was a special day that I will always remember.

We also got together with some of the other cousins/grandchildren on Sunday afternoon, so there was more fun cousin time for the kids. This isn't the best picture, and we didn't have everybody in it, but at least this shows some of the cousins together:

We have started a new decade and a new year, and I hope it brings many good things for me, my family, and for all of you!!

Room Makeover

2019-12-07T11:03:00.000-06:00

Something that has kept me busy this fall is redoing my bedroom. My house is a two-story, so after I became paralyzed, the living room became my bedroom. I've lived in this room for nearly 16 years now, and have wanted to redo it for many years, but I didn't think it would be a possibility because I knew it would be a lot of work--too much for my mom to tackle (especially since I can't even help with the physical labor!). To make a long story short, I finally got my wish to give my room a new look. I spent hours and hours scouring the internet for just the right paint, furniture, lamps, curtain rod/valance, artwork, and more. After about two months of online shopping, planning, de-cluttering, cleaning out, painting, organizing, etc, things are finished.

I forgot to get good "before" pictures. Shoot! We'd already started taking my room apart when my sister snapped these first few pictures on her cell phone. They'll at least give you an idea of what things looked like before the transformation. You can also consult this post from back in 2010 to see some other pictures of what my room looked like at one time.

Here is the big reveal. It's definitely not going to make any design magazines, but I like it, and feel like it is a big improvement.

The verse in the middle frame below is Philippians 4:13 (I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me). Truer words have never been spoken!

This valance looks more green in person, but it was hard to capture the true color. I love the curtain rod with the marble accents on each end. We put up new trim, as well, which looks really nice. (I don't have any pictures of the trim.)

I have a lot of medical supplies that we need to have close by, so these cubbies and baskets help keep things organized. I also have a closet, hutch, and an area in the basement to keep our stock of other medical supplies. You can also see the Good Shepherd on the wall watching over me. :)

We also replaced the knobs on the cabinet, which had yellowed with age:

I was sitting in my recliner, which is just out of frame, but I didn't want to be included in the pictures.

This project would not have been possible without two of my very dear friends, Kellie and Jessica, who helped my mom and me with every aspect of my room. They were amazing, and I'm so grateful for their friendship and help. Things wouldn't have gone nearly as well or as quickly without their assistance.

My room definitely isn't high-tech, grand, or like the "afters" you would see on an HGTV program, but it suits my needs. It's sure a lot more than some people in the world have, so I'm just grateful for a comfortable home, and to have a roof over my head. I know if I play my cards right, I will earn a heavenly mansion one day, so I'm holding out for that!

Update

2019-11-18T14:34:00.002-06:00

To say I have fallen off the blogging bandwagon would be an understatement, since I haven't made any new posts in months! I just feel like my blog has pretty much run its course, and that I've said everything there is to say. That being said, I know there are a few people out there that still follow my blog, so I just wanted to make a post to assure everyone that I'm alive and well. Still here. Still paralyzed. :)

I enjoyed several visits from my out-of-town sisters this summer and it's always a treat to spend time with my sisters, nieces and nephews, all of whom I adore so much. I also enjoy having my sister Chandra and her adorable kids, Christian and Ruby, over several times a week. I treasure this time with them, because I know when Christian and Ruby are both in school full-time, I won't be able to see them near as much.

Here are a couple pictures of Christian's first day of preschool. If you look closely, the sign says that when he grows up, he wants to be a dogcatcher. Christian LOVES the movie The Secret Life of Pets, and he likes to play "dogcatcher." He is also enthralled with the trash truck, and he loves to watch YouTube videos with me of trash men collecting trash. I think you can pretty much find videos of anything on YouTube! Christian also turned four in September.

Christian wanted to be a dinosaur for Halloween, and Ruby was a sweet little wolf (a she-wolf).

Yesterday was the 16th anniversary of my car accident. We celebrated by getting some pizza from Papa John's on Saturday, and my mom made a chocolate cake with the most delicious chocolate whipped buttercream frosting that my sister Kristin told me about. That's a dessert worth being paralyzed for! 16 years later, and I'm still grateful for my accident. It has resulted in a physically challenging life, but it was also a catalyst for spiritual progression, and it was exactly what I needed at that time in my life to add some fuel to my empty gas tank. God is good, and He knew what I needed, I know I'm a better person because of what I've been through.

Ruby is ONE!

2019-03-20T10:59:00.000-05:00

Ruby turned one on March 7. The past year has flown by! We celebrated her birthday by having a little pizza party for lunch, since Ruby really likes pizza (smart girl!). My mom and I also gave Ruby her birthday present.

I don't know what was going on in the picture below, but when I saw it, I thought it was hilarious. Chandra and I thought a perfect caption for it would be "When it's your sister's birthday, and you find out there are no presents for you." Actually, Christian really wasn't upset; he was excited to help Ruby open her gift.

Ruby isn't walking yet, but right before she opened her present, she kept standing up and she'd put her arms out, almost like she was riding a wave on a surf board. She did it multiple times, and it was so funny to see her standing there like that. I kept waiting for her to take a step, but she didn't.

She had two different birthday crowns from the dollar store, and looked adorable in both of them.

Chandra isn't looking in the picture below, but Ruby looked adorable, so I had to include it. The other two pictures turned out too bright, but they're going in the blog post, too!

We tried to get a picture of Christian and Ruby, but kids are hard to photograph! Christian sure loves Ruby, and I hope these two will always be friends. I love it when Christian sweetly says, "Hey little Ruby girl" in a soothing tone, or when he says, "She's just a baby."

Since Chandra's husband couldn't come over for lunch on Ruby's birthday, we had Ruby's birthday dinner this past Sunday. Chandra made bacon-wrapped pulled pork and homemade coleslaw for dinner, which is one of my favorite meals. It's SO delicious! We had "Ruby Red Velvet" cupcakes for dessert.

Christian was in a funk and he refused to put his shirt back on for the pictures. Oh well.

Ruby mostly just mashed her cake around in her hands, but I think she licked her hands a couple of times, and seemed to like it.

Here are some more pictures from the last few months of Ruby's life:

Here's a cute story about the picture on the left: We got snow in January, and Christian loved playing in it. The next morning the first thing he did after waking up was rush to the window to see if the snow was still on the ground. It was. :)

Ruby loves to play outside and crawl around in the grass:

All dressed up and ready for church!

We sure love our little Ruby girl!

Elizabeth Turns 18

2019-01-28T14:30:00.003-06:00

Sharon's oldest, Elizabeth, turned 18 on December 27. It's so hard to believe little Elizabeth is now a legal adult! This is her last Christmas at home before she goes off to college next year. Crazy!

We had a nice birthday dinner for her:

Time for presents!

Sarah made an adorable college survival kit for Elizabeth, and she wrote a poem to introduce/explain each of the items in the kit. Rachel (in pink) helped by holding each item up as Sarah mentioned it in her poem. It was such a sweet gift!

This is one of those infinity scarves with a zipper pocket in it for your cell phone/keys/wallet/ID/Chapstick, etc. It's just a nice way to have a few things with you, but you don't have to carry a purse. Perfect for college life!

Elizabeth also got a nice Better Homes & Gardens cookbook. She also got Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban (the large illustrated version). The illustrated Harry Potter books have really cool pictures in them.

The whole Leigh gang, and then a picture of Elizabeth and Chan:

I sure love Elizabeth, and I'm glad I get to see her a couple times each year!

Lazy Sunday Afternoon

2019-01-22T20:30:00.000-06:00

This is a post with some pictures from back on December 23. It was a Sunday afternoon, and we were just enjoying hanging out as a family after we got home from church. I wanted to take a few pictures since I was up and looking presentable. Here I am with my sister, Sharon. We both had sweaters on that were the same shade of red. The next picture is of me and my niece, Elizabeth.

And here I am with Chandra:

Chan and sweet Ruby:

Rachel was crocheting, and her skein of yarn was a bit tangled. Her dad was helping her untangle it, so she could roll it into a ball. Christian was assisting. It was a group effort!

Kate was reading Les Misérables, but she stopped to smile for the camera. I thought the pictures below of Spencer and Ruby were cute. I loved how they were smiling at each other:

Christmas 2018

2019-01-17T22:39:00.001-06:00

Well, I've really been procrastinating making a blog post about Christmas. I'm lazy, what can I say?! SO, I will just do a quick post, mainly with pictures and with a few details here and there. I had a great Christmas, and it was wonderful to spend it with my sister Sharon and her family. I'm grateful that they make the trip up from Mississippi to spend Christmas with us. Chandra and her family also spent a lot of time over here. Christian loves seeing his cousins. :)

It's really hard to get good pictures in this room, so some of them are better than others, but at least I can look back in the future and remember what was going on.

Rachel made these adorable little aprons for herself and Emi. She did it all by herself. I love how creative she is!

Christian asked for two things for Christmas: a scooter and an orange clock to hang in his bedroom. (We have no clue where the second request came from!) He got both, but wasn't interested in smiling for the camera:

Ruby got a doll that says, "I love you."

I made Elizabeth a personalized mug from Shutterfly with pictures from her life. I wish I would've gotten a better picture of her with it, but I didn't. I'm so glad she liked it, though!

Emi gave me her gingerbread girl that she made at school, and I gave her a rock painting kit:

Sarah got a large stack of books for Christmas:

Chandra and Mom working on Christmas dinner, and Christian and Rachel painting:

One of my favorite Christmas gifts came from Sarah (she is 13, and she plays percussion in band). Sarah gave us her Christmas present one night after dinner was cleaned up. She'd previously asked everybody what their favorite Christmas song was, and she composed a medley that she entitled "Mistletoe Medley" consisting of 13 or 14 different Christmas songs. She played it on her bells (small xylophone), which she'd brought with her. It was SO sweet, and she did such a great job. Sharon said that Sarah had been working on her piece and had been practicing since October. Sarah's hard work and thoughtfulness really touched my heart, and I couldn't help but cry while she played. We convinced her to give us an encore performance a couple nights later, even though she didn't want to.

Ruby Recap: 7-9 Months

2019-01-09T19:39:00.001-06:00

I'm so late in posting this, since Ruby is now 10 months old, but I'll still make a short post. Ruby turned nine months old on December 7. Chandra never seems to have enough time to take monthly pictures of Ruby, like we did with Christian, but we do have a few pictures from the last three months, which I will share in my post.

Ruby started solids at six months. She wasn't crazy about them at first, but has since started liking them:

Chandra took the kids to the park a couple of times this fall, and Ruby enjoyed swinging:

I love these pictures:

Mommy's little girl:

More cute pictures:

Ruby's first Christmas! Here she is at the church Christmas party:

Ruby and Grammy:

Goodbye, Grandpa

2019-01-08T00:02:00.002-06:00

Goodbye to my sweet grandpa, Warren "Zim" Zimmerman (March 13, 1922-January 3, 2019). There are so many wonderful things I could say about Grandpa. Here are a few details about his life:

– Purple Heart recipient after he was nearly killed when a bomb exploded 3 feet from him when he served in the Army in World War II. (Grandpa impacted many people's lives in a positive way, which wouldn't have been possible had Grandpa not survived! Thankfully, God knew what He was doing.)

– Husband to my grandma, Helen, for 68 years.

– Father of four, grandfather of 15, and great-grandfather of 34.

– Beloved teacher and elementary school principal.

– Volunteer: after he retired in 1984, he spent countless hours volunteering at schools, church and the hospital. He even volunteered in a prison, teaching English to Hispanic inmates. He taught another incarcerated man to read.

– Some of Grandpa's hobbies and interests were sports and fitness—he especially loved tennis—and he exercised all the way up until the end of his life to stay physically fit. He also loved traveling, gardening and photography. He also had quite a collection of shells.

– Three words I would use to describe Grandpa are: gentle, loving and kind.

High school graduation (1940) and Army during WWII:

Marriage to my grandma, Helen (1950), and a picture around 2010:

My high school graduation (2002), and a picture from 2005:

Visits from Grandma and Grandpa in 2012 and 2016:

Celebrating Grandpa's 94th birthday in 2016:

The Zimmerman family—Grandma and Grandpa, my mom, and my uncles, Rick and Steve (my uncle Scott died in 1994 at age 38—he and Grandpa are now reunited). And my mom's last trip to Minnesota to visit her parents (October 2018):

I will miss Grandpa, but I am comforted knowing that he is in a much better place, and I will see him again! ❤️

15 | "Silver" Anniversary

2018-11-17T14:33:00.000-06:00

Today marks the 15th anniversary of my car accident, which means I've been paralyzed for 15 years. 15 years is a long time! I'm calling this my "silver" anniversary.

A couple years ago I read an article in Meridian (an online magazine) with an analogy comparing the trials and sufferings of mortal life to the process a silversmith uses to rid silver of impurities. This excerpt is kind of long, but worth the read:

In Malachi 3:3 we are told that the Lord “shall sit as a refiner and purifier of silver.” There are some great lessons here for us. For centuries, silversmiths would put broken, crushed ore into a fiery furnace and turn up the heat to melt off the impurities. Are we not broken, rough, and filled with impurities?

Silver experts knew which impurities would melt off at which temperatures. And the refiner had to be vigilant and watch carefully, because if the temperature got too high, the silver could be ruined. This is exactly how the Lord watches over us, with constant attention to the details of our lives. He knows every pain, every sorrow you feel—in fact, he took those upon himself in atoning for us. He also will not allow us to be tried beyond our ability to withstand it, if we turn to him for help.

But one of the most beautiful analogies in this process is how a silversmith knows when the silver is done—he sees his reflection in it. And Christ will see his reflection in us when all our impurities have melted away, and we have truly given our hearts to him.

When harsh challenges arise, we still have a choice. We can be as a wisp of paper thrown into a fire and quickly consumed, or we can choose to be silver, and allow that trial to refine us, and make us into something better than we were. We can sink into despair and self-pity, adopting the victim role, or we can be fearless and faithful, determined to triumph.

James E. Faust once said, “Here then is a great truth. In the pain, the agony, and the heroic endeavors of life, we pass through a refiner’s fire, and the insignificant and the unimportant in our lives can melt away like dross and make our faith bright, intact, and strong. In this way the divine image can be mirrored from the soul. It is part of the purging toll exacted of some to become acquainted with God. In the agonies of life, we seem to listen better to the faint, godly whisperings of the Divine Shepherd.”

If you are struggling with a problem (or several) right now, ask yourself: Am I going to be paper or silver? We get to choose.

So often people look at their less-than-ideal, challenging, or unfair circumstances and they just get bitter and angry, and fail to use it as a springboard for growth. Anger and bitterness are normal reactions, of course, and they are justified for a time, but after a while you just have to accept things and make lemonade out of the lemons life has dealt you. With the Lord's help, I have allowed the challenges I've experienced as a result of becoming paralyzed to shape me into a better person than I was in my pre-paralysis life. There's truly nothing like adversity to expedite personal growth! For this reason, I'm so grateful for my accident and all it has helped me become. I've always maintained that the worst thing to happen to me physically, was the best thing to happen to me spiritually and emotionally, and I'd never change things if it meant forgoing all of that growth.

So the next time something bad happens to you, just consider it your own time to become a little less like paper, and a little more like silver.