Partner Flow

lesson from contact improv: appreciate the kinks

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Sat, 09 Apr 2011 20:08:00 +0000

This bit of wisdom (paraphrased through my perception) came by way of a Hilary Rubin's yoga podcast and has been rolling around my head recently as awonderful reframe for life experience:

Be grateful for the stuck spots, the tightnesses, the awkward places- they show us how our lives can be even more full...

My interpretation: If I can identify a stuck spot- whether in my body or in life- it will only increase my own potential as a human being to move through the world. If there is even more to be experienced in this life then why wouldn't I want to allow my time in this brief existence to be fuller, richer, deeper?

I'm not speaking to trying to get more of any of those things. Rather, they are the natural result of exploring life more deeply and becoming ever more appreciative of this short span on earth that we get to have.

I see that the hard part is when I know there's a kink somewhere, and the way to reach an outcome, assuming thats even understood (which usually its not), is not in sight or requires intense perseverance and patience.

Appreciating the kinks has been the approach that came to me in my own experience of exploring my physical body through the practice of contact improv. Many physical kinks became apparent, created from accidents and habitual ways of operating in my body (such as at the computer for long stretches of time). For many years the primary way I have engaged contact is as a healing modality- to do bodywork on myself through another person (and vice versa simultaneously- its amazing). Almost every time I engage another for a brief round of movement/stretching I end the engagement with a breath of air that feels like it fills my body much more deeply than was present before. The body's experience of this bigger breath is unmistakably tangible- its a fullness that permeates my entire being.

So now I seek the kinks...

If you were to think about it, what kinks in your life have you been grateful for? What are the kinks right now your future self will be grateful for? No matter where you are in the process, give yourself the gift of that gratitude right now. :-)

bless-zings!
~andres

The 'Ground'

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Wed, 23 Mar 2011 00:26:00 +0000

To paraphrase an adage, writing about Partner Flow is like doing math about wine tasting. It exists unto itself and while metaphors and similes can scratch the surface, it must be experienced through its own channels to be felt.

For as heady as I can get about it, Partner Flow, and movement in general, has at its core nothing to do with the mind. Which really calls out those of us who live in our heads, revealed in awkwardness and uncertainty in movements. The brain can't consciously control everything we do, especially in new movements, although it might try. At its best moments, in dance the brain is merely seeing the body move, sensing its dynamic motions and stepping in only to the degree that any moment may call for- to redirect from an obstacle, to take care of our own bodies, to engage in a set of intentions for any particular encounter.

Personal Groundedness...
I've come to see the term 'being grounded' as referring to an internal connection with the part of myself that does not change. As long as I am alive I still have breath and so I can always remember my breathing and ground myself with that. That very awareness alone has helped me focus when things got hairy.

There are elements from which the rest of me is derived- my values, my beliefs, my connectedness. The deeper I develop these aspects of myself, the more 'grounded' I feel. From an unshakeable sense of self, fearless acts can arise. Its funny that the very act of developing the ego can help dissolve it. The more solid I feel in who I am the less threatened I feel by the way the world can be. And interestingly, the more receptive I find myself being to approaching preconceptions that my identity might be hanging to. If my sense of self is not rooted in myself then I will always be bound to the whims of wherever the sense of self is being derived. (But I digress and will continue that road in the future).

'Grounded' Awareness...

I've come to understand an awareness as being 'grounded' when it is connected to one's actual experience. Spiritual epiphanies are the ones that don't come through reading the bible, they come when one literally has a physically palpable experience that shakes them from their worldview or at least gives a sufficiently solid understanding to base one's awareness. Eating chocolate is an entire universe away from reading about it. Which method would have you most convincingly recommending the chocolate experience to someone else? The purely intellectual will never garner the passion that direct experience can.

The awarenesses we take from any particular experience allows us to make higher level claims, abstracting the awareness into a perspective that moves beyond the original experience. This can be a negative if there isn't an awareness that the perspective is merely that, and not an actual reflection of the real world. But it is positive when it permits us deeper access to an awareness. The nature of the abstraction will define the individual. Examples of some heavy duty abstractions: the yin/yang symbol, the cross, astrology, all of science, Poor Richards Almanac by Benjamin Franklin ("Do what you ought, and not what you please").

To be grounded is to be at that place where the rubber meets the road, the place where life is happening. Me and my perception of reality meet at this interface. The more connected I am to my self and my experience, the fewer filters I carry to obscure the layers of meaning in any experience, the better I can work with whatever a multi- faceted reality has in store.

So there's 'groundedness in oneself' and 'groundedness of awareness'. So far its been the grounded awarenesses that have been the leading cause of my consciousness momentum. You feel it and therefore can confidently abstract. And then action follows.

The ground between two people...

We create, communicate, and translate abstractions of our experience to another, who passes the communication through their own systems. Considering the levels of filters that exist between two people, its amazing we can transmit and receive as much as we do.

In order to have true communication, there has to be a ground between two people. That can include language, shared experience, shared beliefs. Without this people might have no capacity to understand each other in any way...

The physical aspect of groundedness...
Goundedness connotes physical connection to the ground. Stabilizing. Anchoring. If I were to walk onto an inner-tube floating in a pool, I'd quickly discover its ungroundedness. The same inner-tube on land would have a measure of groundedness- it would yield a bit, but it has the actual ground to keep it from at least bobbing around, giving me more to stabilize myself with.

A grounded person can hold another on their shoulders whereas an ungrounded person might struggle against their imbalance.

Someone who is said to be grounded feels like a person who is solid, and thus someone from whom we can 'anchor'. We might feel that they are dependable, that we have a sense of who they are. We feel more comfortable building our own structures on the foundation that they create. In a co-worker this might look like someone who has a track record in their area of expertise- I might feel comfortable depending on their part in a project in order for my part to be worthwhile. A grounded person possesses a solidity of balance or character or purpose. The level of risk I might be willing to take is directly connected to my feeling of the groundedness of whomever I am working with.

And, as ever, the very nature of the groundedness maintains and fuels itself- the experiential connectedness to something be it one's center of balance, or the firm footing beneathe one's feet, or one's connection to their deeper purpose has one engaging those things even more, further solidifying the awareness. These experiences emanate from a person connected to their core. You can feel when you're in the presence of a solidly grounded individual. And conversely, a skittish person who avoids eye contact or someone who can never make rent are perhaps not people someone can rest themeslves or their commitments.

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So there we have a look at the idea of 'the ground'. I'll be referring to it as this blog progresses....

Where do you find your ground? What grounds you?

an exercise in beliefs

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Tue, 22 Mar 2011 00:22:00 +0000

I was rereading the fabulous book on Neurolinguistic Programming (Introducing NLP by O'connor and Seymour) and came across an activity dealing with beliefs that sparked in me deeper understanding around experiences I have recently been having.

The activity follows, stick around for it. There's important food for thought...

But first the prelude. We are creatures of our beliefs. Its not new news. It just never fails to amaze me how that plays itself out in our experience. There are moments in our lives when a belief we held tightly to, either one about ourselves or the world or both simultaneously, shifted drastically. From then on our perspective included the new belief and our life was shifted as a result of acting from that belief. We can all think of instances like this.

Its amazing to have our life energy liberated by something as simple, and as elusive, as a degree shift in how we perceive ourselves or reality. It truly can be like being removed from a prison- potentials and possibilities entering in where previously only constraint was felt.

So its interesting to note that all beliefs, including ones that seem the most important, such as one's belief in a particular deity, or in the feeling that killing baby seals is wrong (I put that in there for shock value), are limiting. By their very nature beliefs constrain the unknowable.

That is fine; constraint is not bad in itself. For instance, my mind can only take in so much- to simply get a grasp on what I experience, my brain heavily compresses 'reality' into a manageable size, which means there is always more data left out than is included. The limited focus my brain can manage narrows in on the bits that seem pertinent to me, which is influenced by (and simultaneously influences) the beliefs I carry.

Beliefs allow us to make broad-scale judgements and act accordingly. They can elevate our way of being- 'I am a good person', 'the world is comprised of love', or they can lock us up- 'I am stupid', '[whomever] is evil'. In their way, beliefs empower us in some form and give us the capacity to act without thinking, to take something for granted as being whatever way one is thinking it is (or ought to be).

The narrowing of reality isn't good or bad, neither is the the constraint- what's good is how this may free up our energy to move in more powerful ways, what's bad is how it may have us acting in hurtful ways or with less potent energy.

The world is neither as simple as we can come to perceive it, nor as stable as we might ever think. Even if the world were exactly the same with nothing else changing, we ourselves are an ongoing process, one that doesn't stop until the the moment we leave this existence (and even then...). As we grow, our perceptions shift- towards...wherever they shift towards. Hopefully the shift grants more access to the fullness of life. Sometimes, though, the self-lock up can get more severe.

Here's what I am realizing: To the degree that beliefs have shifted in my past, liberating the sense of who I could be, I must be aware the this process continues even now. To think that I know myself is to immediately reduce who I am able to be. There will always be ways to be an even fuller expression of my being. There will always be places where my ego is fighting for itself primarily and not for the general well-being.

There will always be a way to take a fuller breath, to expand more into who I am.

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The Activity

This activity offered me a point of reflection into the elements that have brought me be to who I am today. Everyone has experienced at least one ground shaking belief shift that has given them fuller access to life. The following activity has me looking at those moments with new eyes, and in the process looking into the limitations I currently carry.

Belief projection activity:

Think of a belief or 2 or 3 that limited you 5, 10, or 20 years ago and write it down. How did that shifted belief change your life? How might your life be now had that belief been maintained?
Take a moment to clear your mind. Stand up, walk around and take a few deep breaths.
Now think of a new belief that would empower you, that would enhance the quality of your life.
Look into a big, friendly mirror and imagine yourself acting as if this new belief were reality. How would your life be in 5,10, or 20 years? How would your life feel differently?

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Here's what I came up with:

Past limiting belief: 'I am not an artist'.

Wow. I can't imagine what my life would be like had I continued in this belief. There was a palpable moment when I was 28 when I literally gave myself permission to pursue art. 5 years later I had already had 4 years of being paid to do my art. I had made it across the country several times to create installations. I was living in an artist's cooperative that I co-founded. More pertinently, creative perception and expression become a way of living. Now 10 years later most of my work involves artistic expression of some sort. I have been to other countries to create my work. My art has become a way to engage and elevate others, which feeds my soul.

A belief that would liberate my energy: ' I have everything I need right now'

I have been exposed to this idea quite often and yet I can always find places where an internal response I might have it 'there's not enough...[whatever]'. That could be money, time, work, patience, experience...Whatever feels to be lacking is a reflection of whatever may be up for me at the moment. That recurring voice has me constricting around whatever I might have if it seems to be in limited supply. So generosity can become stifled.

I can see that incorporating this belief in my life would have me engaging the world with perhaps less restrictions on my own personal needs which might make my energy ever more available to offer to the world. I don't mean to say that I need to give more to the world necessarily, but I can see that more of me could be available when I let go of concerning myself about what I am lacking. It's hard to predict what any new belief will turn into years down the road, but I can see that I am only served by lessening the feeling of concern of not having enough. I am reminded of words I heard about the Buddha, that if he had only one bit of advice to offer it would be that if he was down to his last food, he would share his meal with another. He said that the benefits to both the giver and the receiver were incalculable. I like that thought...

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Let us be guided, not controlled by our beliefs. May what we choose to follow expand our potential and bring us more fully into our true selves.

-Andres 3/20/11

Partner Flow...for Lovers

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Mon, 21 Mar 2011 03:57:00 +0000

exploring Partner Flow to connect more deeply in heart and body

Give your relationship a treat and connect with your loved one through the body in a way that you may never have before. Spend some time helping each other feel really good without being sexual. Feel your body and feel their body become present to one another, moving in ways you probably never would have expected. While you're at it you will gain new perspectives on yourself and your partner and about how energy moves between people and within the world. Through cooperation we can create something beyond either individual. Activities we'll be doing:

deep, whole-body listening techniques
fun, simple games that can be done any time to bring our partner into stillness (or movement!) with us
energetically exploring our partner's bodies
gaining comfort in sharing weight
wacky ways to deeply stretch
deeply nurturing ways to hold each other
explore giving and receiving energy
wrestling and other feisty play

With an intimate partner benefits include:

deeper connection between partners
developing greater sensitivity to the physical being that is our partner
learning to engage or redirect energy rather than block it
tension relief- for self and relationship
increased physical health
expanding the range of energetic expression between intimate partners

FAQ's

What makes it for "Lovers"? We'll explore how contact improv can be a fundamental way to engage our intimate partners and our relating as a whole.
Don't have a lover right now? Bring a friend you feel comfortable with. All activities can be done from light to heavy, its up to your in-the-moment needs.
Is it sexual? That's the beauty of Partner Flow, it allows for connected, sensual exploration that is simultaneously platonic- we learn to engage our partner in a holistic manner, much deeper than the merely sexual. In any case, clothes stay on. :-)

Classes

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Mon, 21 Mar 2011 03:32:00 +0000

An overview of our current classes....

Follow the link for more information

- Partner Flow: Playtime!

- Partner Flow: Energize!

- Partner Flow: The Power of Now

- Partner Flow: Slow Down

- Partner Flow: For Lovers

Preparation list for attending a Playshop
...FAQ's

Partner Flow: Playtime!

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Mon, 21 Mar 2011 01:18:00 +0000

You work hard...give yourself a treat! Through light-hearted, playful movement we will explore our curiosity, spontaneity and abandon. Combining Yoga Principles with Contact Improvisation.

Unpartnered folks welcome. No experience necessary.

Upcoming Class:

Date:
Location:

...Party Instruction

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Sun, 20 Mar 2011 00:42:00 +0000

Feeling adventurous? Want to try something new for your event? Engage your guests with interactive performance. We costume-up and provide playful performance and dance instruction that gets party-goers moving!

Partner Flow is an amazing way to connect with others through the body. It's a fabulous way to bring a group together, to lower barriers and get energy moving. We offer instruction for groups of virtually any size, with a time of 5 minutes to full workshops. Contact us to see what we can do for your group.

Depending on the needs of the event, activities we'll generally do:

Playful ways to platonically connect
Wacky ways to deeply stretch
High energy yet deeply connected movement
Deep whole-body listening techniques

Partner Flow: Energize!

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Sat, 19 Mar 2011 02:49:00 +0000

Feeling run-down after a long day? Drop into your body, connect with others and enliven your evening! We will explore focused touch and guided movement that will energize you and leave you smiling and feeling connected. Combines Yoga Principles with Contact Improvisation.

Unpartnered folks welcome. No experience needed.

Upcoming Class:Date:
Location:

About Us

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Sat, 19 Mar 2011 00:19:00 +0000

Together we have over 15 years of group development and education experience working with a whole range of ages and backgrounds.

——————————————————–—–

Ember Dequincy
My curiosity and creative energy guide my continuous desire to learn. Upon completing my studies in Wildlife Biology at Humboldt State University, I discovered my love for educating the public and went on to develop and implement environmental education and interpretive programs for East Bay Regional Park District, Oakland Museum and YMCA in California and Hawaii. In my varied education endeavors, I noticed the importance of physical activity and body awareness as a vehicle for learning and well-being in my students. Inspired by this realization, I subsequently studied a variety of movement forms, including poi, trapeze, silks, contact improvisation, and even became certified as a hula hoop dance instructor, teaching hoop dance as a means to greater body intelligence and self-confidence. Currently I am in the process of attaining my Yoga instructor’s training. My rich and varied experiences have instilled in me a curiosity about life and the ability to offer this gift to others.

——————————————————–—–

Andres Amador

I have a far ranging background. After graduating college in Environmental Sciences I served in the Peace Corps where my main focus was developing environmental education materials to dovetail conservation efforts in Andean villages. Upon returning home in 1999 I became a computer consultant but left the field to pursue artistic and movement interests. From 2000-2005 I managed a San Francisco arts and performance cooperative. My backgrounds include Aikido, Tae Kwon Do, Yoga, Tai Chi, Flow Arts, Contact Improv, and Neuro Linguistic Programming. My artwork has been exhibited nationally and internationally. Recently I has become known for my large-scale, temporary, environmental art works which can be viewed at my personal website. I actively expand the boundaries of many disciplines. Seeing life holistically, I strive to access the sacred in all my explorations and work to convey the knowledge contained within my learnings and discoveries to others.

Partner Flow: The Power of Now

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Fri, 18 Mar 2011 02:50:00 +0000

Let go of your expectations! Being in the moment means having no attachment to how things are supposed to look or what shouldhappen next- it's accepting whatever is happening and working with that. Through playful and invigorating partnered activities we will explore presence in movement. Combines Yoga Principles with Contact Improvisation.

Unpartnered folks welcome. No experience necessary.

Upcoming Class:

Date:
Location:

Partner Flow...After Dark

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Thu, 17 Mar 2011 03:58:00 +0000

Exploring the sensual realm of Partner Flow

Spark the Fire and Move the Jujuwith Partner Flow After Dark...

Looking to....

Expand your physical experience beyond intimacy for the sake of sex?
Feel wholebody juice with your beloved?
Open up to playfully sensuous ways to engage in the bedroom (or anywhere!)?

Lets dim the lights, put on the soft music, andturn up the heat with Partner Flow After Dark. This playshop takes the Partner Flow fundamentals and adds a risqué touch!

Activities we'll be doing:

deep, whole-body listening techniques
energetically exploring our partner’s body
explore flirting & teasing while in deeply connected movement
wrestling, biting and other feisty play

Partner Flow: Slow Down

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Thu, 17 Mar 2011 02:45:00 +0000

Life moves so fast! Take the time to slow down: still your mind, deepen your breath, feel your body. This class focuses on experiencing each moment, each movement, more fully. We will explore a range of touch and motion through partnered exercises. Combines Yoga Principles with Contact Improvisation.

Upcoming Class:Date:
Location:

...Private Sessions

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Tue, 15 Mar 2011 00:43:00 +0000

Is your relationship losing its spark? Desiring to deepen connection? Learn a new language, deepen intimacy and have fun with your partner through this gentle, guided movement. Whether you're lifelong partners or brand new lovers, Partner Flow has something to offer you:

deepen connection with yourself and partner
improve physical health
release tension
increase self-confidence
play!

We create and maintain a safe space for you and your partner to reconnect, explore and discover new things about one another, and get a deep, yummy stretch...all through non-sexual movement!

Private sessions are tailored to meet your relationship needs. Contact Us for more info and to schedule your first session.

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Here's how others felt about their Partner Flow experience:

"I love the idea of other ways to connect and drop into your partner without words. I think it is a wonderful metaphor for life, to stop and breathe with your partner."

" I loved the safe and trusted space that you created from the moment we walked in. [We] felt able to open up and explore."

"It's a beautiful way to engage each other in a sensual way."

Private sessions are tailored to meet your relationship needs. Contact Us for more info and to schedule your first session.

Partner Flow: For Lovers

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Mon, 14 Mar 2011 00:57:00 +0000

Connect with someone you care about in a new way. Grab your lover or friend and join our playshop. Explore communicating through the body doing activities that energize and liberate tension in the body while playfully engaging your partner in new ways. Enjoy deep connection and yummy releasing on your next date night!

Unpartnered folks welcome. No experience necessary

Next Class:
Date:
Location:

Preparation list for attending a Playshop

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Sun, 13 Mar 2011 03:52:00 +0000

- wear loose clothing that is comfortable for you and your partner to roll around in
- avoid exposed zippers, buckles and scratchy seams
- bring a water bottle and come hydrated
- bring yoga mats if you have one
- come with satisfied but empty bellies. If you desire bring a light snack (fruit, nuts etc)
- come well rested- you'll get much more if you are alert in your body

one more step...!

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Sun, 13 Mar 2011 02:32:00 +0000

Thank you for your interest- and now...

One last step: You've been sent an email that contains a confirm link.

Your subscription is not complete until you click the link in the email to verify your email address.

thank you for joining us...

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Sun, 13 Mar 2011 02:29:00 +0000

Thank you so much for joining our list! We look forward to seeing your face at a future event :-)

Testimonials

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Fri, 11 Mar 2011 01:16:00 +0000

Here are some words we've received about our work:

"It realigns the meaning and purpose of touch for me. I enjoy the physical contact that is not sexually centered"
"It’s great to have lots of ways to shift energy that doesn’t involve talking or processing"
"I’m interested in the fun and nurturing aspects of this exchange.
"I honestly absolutely loved it!"
"It gave me a sense of confidence and well being. A connection with my partner that I would like to continue to have and also a deeper connection with myself."

Partner Flow...for Fun

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Sun, 20 Feb 2011 01:37:00 +0000

games that play with the intersection of yoga and interconnected movement

Partner Flow brings together core principles of Yoga and Contact Improv, creating a blend that you must experience to understand. Through cultivating a deeply grounded inner connectedness, connected movementbetween people becomes possible.

Once the basic principles are understood, there’s all sorts of directions it can be taken.

Partner Flow is an amazing way to connect with others through the body. It’s a fabulous way to feels one’s own body while bringing people together. Whether strangers, friends, or lovers, there is a form of Partner Flow that suits almost every situation.

...FAQ's

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Thu, 20 Jan 2011 01:42:00 +0000

What is it? Partner Flow is a core way to approach engaging another's energy, crucial to any contact improv play.
New to Contact Improv? This class is the perfect, gentle introduction to a whole big world.
A Contact veteran? Expand your range and sensitivity.
Is it difficult to learn? Since Partner Flow is about moving with the energy that's present, there's no one way to do it. It can be slow, fast, dancey, stretchy, smooth, and at times, awkward. As long as you stay engaged, it's all right!
Can anyone do it? If you are able walk of your own accord, you can do it!
How will I benefit? Partner Flow is physically healing in that it's likely to offer you one of the deepest stretches you've ever received. It's deeply connecting...to self and your partner. It also facilitates tension release, communication, intimacy, self-confidence and is FUN!

Body Maps

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Sun, 12 Apr 2009 02:04:00 +0000